Losing Control
by StupidLeeches
Summary: "Let Love In" series, story 1. Embry Call isn't interested in an imprintee; or a girlfriend, for that matter. Enter Lillah Hunter, a Forks native returning after years of being away. She's the last woman Embry wants to meet. So why cant he stay away?
1. Chapter 1 Play with Fire

**Chapter 1 "Play with Fire"**

**Disclaimer: **We don't own anything that SM wrote (characters or plot lines). We do own some Twilight Pocket People, a million copies of each book and movie and two nice new crisp Wolf Pack posters. Oh, and we own Lillah and Carter. That's about it.

**A/N: **This story has been a long time coming. We really hope that you enjoy reading it as much as we enjoyed writing it. _Finally_ it's here, with an extra special thanks to dailyicandy.

**Lil-lah**, Variant of Lily: Lily flower, a symbol of innocence; purity and beauty.

_Heart of mine, __  
__Be still__  
__You can play with fire,__  
__But you'll get the bill__  
__Don't let him know__  
__Don't let him know that you love him__  
__Oh, don't be a fool, don't be blind__  
__Heart of mine_  
"Heart of Mine" - Norah Jones

-0-

I place a tray of sandwiches on the kitchen table and run to the door as soon as I hear the doorbell ring. I'm excited to finally meet Rachel Black face-to-face. Principal Green has teamed us up as co-coach's of the Forks High School cheerleading squad for the upcoming school year. I called Rachel yesterday to invite her over to my house for us to meet and discuss plans for the team, she happily agreed.

When I open the door, I'm surprised. I shouldn't be, I've never fit the typical description of a cheerleader myself, even in high school. I have never been perky, blonde or tan, but for some reason, I assumed Rachel would be. Instead, she's about five inches taller than my five foot three frame. She has rich, reddish-brown skin, long, straight black hair, and wide-set, expressive eyes. She's not a typical cheerleader, but she's still beautiful. I feel short and fat next to her, but I still put on a welcoming face.

"Rachel, I presume?" I extend my hand to shake, but she scoffs, pulling me in to a tight hug.

"Lillah! It's so nice to finally meet you! And to have a co-coach that isn't ancient. Bless Mrs. Cope, but if she told me one more time 'This is how we've always done it' I think I would have pushed her off the cliffs!"

I'm surprised by how friendly she is, making me laugh despite my nerves, "I'm glad to help, and to prevent you from having to push Mrs. Cope off the cliffs. I'm pretty sure that would mean jail time. Come on in."

Rachel follows me into the kitchen, laughing along the way, "True, jail time would be bad. So I thank you for coming along before I had to go to extreme measures. My fiance would probably also thank you, I think he'd lose it if I were in jail. This is a beautiful house. You're husband isn't going to mind me being here, is he?"

"Oh thanks, it was my grandparent's house. No husband or boyfriend to worry about. I do have a roommate, my cousin Angela. But she's out with her boyfriend, Ben, right now." We sit down at the table, where I've put out snacks and drinks.

"Help yourself."

"Thanks! So, Lillah, that's an unusal name."

Rachel's smile is genuine, which helps to put me at ease.

"Yeah, my mom's favorite flower is the lily, but for some reason my dad didn't like the name 'Lily'. My mom suspects an ex-girlfriend," I laugh softly.

"So, instead, she found 'Lillah'. Dad agreed and here I am. My dad always jokes and calls me his 'innocent little flower'. It was cute at eight, at twenty-one, it's a little embarrassing!"

Rachel wrinkles her nose, "Ugh, dads! They mean well, but still!"

I have to laugh, because I get the feeling Rachel feels my pain in the Dad department, "Exactly!"

"Are these cucumber sandwiches? Yum! Paul hates stuff like this." Rachel grins, trying a sandwich.

"Paul, is that your fiance?"

Rachel's smile lights up her face as she flashes her left hand at me. A simple, yet very pretty, diamond ring sparkles on her ring finger.

"Yep! We are getting married next spring."

"Lucky you. So tell me about yourself." I nibble on a cucumber sandwich, too excited to get to know Rachel better to eat much.

"Oh, not much to tell. I grew up on the reservation in La Push with my dad, brother and twin sister. I've lived there my whole life, other than when I went to college. Came back home, met Paul, love at first sight and we've been inseparable every since. I taught for a few years at the school on the reservation, but moved up to teach at Forks High School last year. I teach the subject most people hate; math! But I balance out my math nerd ways by also being a cheerleading coach."

Rachel smirks before continuing, "See, boring story. Now I want to know all about you. Especially how someone as adorable as you are could possibly still be single! The boys down at the Rez would love you."

"Why do you think that?" I suppress my laughter. I like Rachel so far, she has a vibrant personality and seems genuine, but I think she's way off base on this one.

"Have you looked in the mirror? Fair skin, strawberry-blonde hair, petite and curvy, and are your eyes grey? Girl, you are the complete opposite of a typical Quileute woman. The boys would eat you up. But enough compliments about how pretty you are, tell me your story!"

I hesitate, "There really isn't much to tell."

"Shush! I want to know it all. How are we supposed to be best friends if you don't tell me all about yourself?"

I have to laugh. Rachel is pushy, demanding, and obviously blind if she thinks I'm pretty, but I have to admit, I really like her. I take a deep breath, then launch in to my story.

-0-

I was born and raised in Forks, as were my parents before me and my grandparents before them. I spent a lot of time with my grandparents while my mom and dad worked hard to provide for me. I wasn't spoiled, but both my parents and grandparents doted on me. If I ever asked for anything, within reason, it was willingly given to me.

At the age of ten my dad was offered a partnership at his law firm, which meant we had to move to Seattle. In my ten year old heart and mind, it was the end of the world. I hated the idea of having to leave my grandparents and the few close friends I had there. My parents enrolled me in Seattle Prep. It's a prestigious school, and I should have been honored to have gotten in, but I spent the summer before my first school year there moping and brooding. Eventually I begged my parents to allow me to go spend a few weeks in Forks but they wouldn't hear of it, they wanted 'family time' and took me on vacation instead.

When I started sixth grade that fall, I kept to myself most of the time. The kids at Prep weren't very welcoming, to say the least. They were all privileged and they used that privilege against other people, including the teachers. I was not into cliques or the 'mean girl' persona at all. Not many of the girls understood that and after while, they steered clear of me. To be honest, I really didn't mind at all, I was happy and well adjusted whether they wanted to be my friend or not.

The next summer my parents finally allowed me to spend some time back in Forks. My best friend and cousin, Angela and I spent day and night at our grandparents' house. I loved being back _home_. Most kids would complain about the near constant rain, wanting to vacation somewhere sunny and warm. Not me, Forks was my safe place and I wanted rather desperately to be back there some day.

Angie and I would play this game where we would pretend we were two single women sharing this beautiful old house. We'd 'throw parties' and pretend to be college students at Peninsula Community College. As I grew older, my fantasies turned a little. I would tell my grandmother I wanted to live in the house one day with my own family. To marry someone and raise my own house full of children here, just as she did. She would smile and pat my hand, telling me we can never control fate, only enjoy the life we have been presented with.

I spent every summer in Forks until I reached my sophomore year of high school. The counselor at Prep informed me it would be great for my transcripts if I were to participate in some extra curricular activities. The only activities with openings were cheerleading and yearbook. I grudgingly signed up for both, the former was not something I looked forward to, the latter I didn't mind so much. I was 'hired' to take random pictures of the student body throughout the school year. I loved being behind the camera instead of in front of it, so it wasn't too big a deal.

Around the same time I started dating a senior boy named Carter Baldwin. He was the football captain and wouldn't hear of dating someone outside of the cheer squad. He also wanted someone with family connections, lucky me, I fit the bill to a 't'. Carter's family was one of the founders of the infamous Starbucks Coffee conglomerate and he expected everything in life to just be handed to him. I honestly have no idea how he floated through high school because Prep wasn't an 'easy' school with courses you could just coast through. I studied my ass off every day, even doing extra credit projects, so I could fast track through high school.

I didn't really have close friends at school, not even the girls on the cheer squad, whom I spent a good bit of time with, so I decided to graduate early and move on to college with Carter. I thought, at the time, it was a good idea moving on before most everyone my age. I'd gotten a little bored in my classes by my final year at Prep and hungered for more of a challenge, even taking basic college courses. Of course, Carter and his friends heckled me about being a bookworm, but I enjoyed learning more than I cared if they made fun of me. My parents and grandparents, who were all much more important to me, told me often how proud they were of me.

Looking back, it was not my best plan to stick with Carter, he was a less than stellar boyfriend. He was a safe guy to date because I wasn't really in love with him. And he was your typical jock that oogled other girls and made rude comments, even when I was around. But it's not like I was looking for a great romance, because honestly, I believed Carter when he told me no other guys would be interested in me.

After my high school graduation I followed Carter to the University of Washington. I lived in the freshman dorms while Carter's parents rented him an apartment. They assumed we would share it but I didn't feel comfortable living with him. Carter and his friends talked about the parties they planned to throw and I knew I didn't want to be caught up in that. I also knew I'd be able to focus on my school work more if I wasn't in an apartment that had a revolving door. The girl I ended up with as my roommate was pretty nice and enjoyed school as much as I did.

During the start of my freshman year my grandfather passed and a few months later, my grandmother passed as well. It was so sad to lose both of them so quickly but my mother confided in me that she felt my grandmother died of a broken heart. After their passing, I became so determined to make them proud that I dove deeper into my studies, declaring my major early on.

My parents were supportive of my choice even though I didn't follow in their footsteps of studying Law. I chose history and decided I wanted to teach. I had a passion for learning and wanted to pass that on to others but it also meant I would be taking college courses for a while longer than Carter. We began to spend less and less time together. He was fully invested in the party side of the "college experience" and I rarely went out with him. When I did, I felt like I was his shadow more than anything. He would ignore me until he was drunk, then he'd turn handsy and grabby.

As we got further in our college careers, I began to approach the subject of our future. Each time I would mention it, Carter would brush me off. I felt like it was time for us to grow up and start discussing what we would do after graduation. I tried talking to him about it many times and he made it crystal clear he didn't want to get married or have a family. Ever. Carter also wouldn't hear of moving to Forks, which was _my_ dream. I came to realize that nothing I wanted mattered to him. To be honest, it probably never had, but I was so focused on school I hadn't bothered noticing. After that things were pretty much back to 'normal' for he and I. Him partying, me studying.

Around the middle of our final semester I discovered Carter was cheating on me. I'd left a book at his apartment and needed it for a class that afternoon. I swung by his place, using the key he'd given me to let myself in. When I walked into the living room I didn't see him but my book was lying where I'd left it the night before. I grabbed it and turned to leave but stopped when I heard noises coming from his room. His door was shut, which I found odd considering his roommates didn't appear to be home. The sounds slowly became louder during the short amount of time I stood there, contemplating what to do.

I might not have had a lot of experience, but I knew what sex sounded like. I quickly walked across the living room before I lost my nerve. My heart was pounding when I placed my hand on the doorknob of his bedroom and turned it, quietly pushing it open. I gasped when I saw Carter in bed with a girl I recognized from a few parties. She noticed me first, alerting Carter to my presence. I turned and fled from the room, Carter chasing after me, slamming the front door before I could open it all the way. Words were exchanged, including him telling me no other guy would ever want me. I'd known Carter was only with me because of what he thought my family connection could provide but I didn't think he'd stoop so low. He called me a few names he always threw at me when he was drunk. When I walked out he slammed the door behind me, yelling "fat frigid bitch" at me through the door.

I found out from a few mutual acquaintances Carter had been cheating on me for a while. For most of our relationship, in fact. Not that I really should have been surprised by this revelation, considering all that had taken place. Honestly, I wasn't what you would call 'upset' by the break up. I spent the rest of my semester studying and preparing for a plethora of papers and exams. I felt lighter, even with my course load. I asked myself over and over why I hadn't broken things off sooner.

I finished my college career at twenty-one years old with my Masters degree in education in hand. I went back to my parents house in Seattle and immediately began looking for jobs. My main focus was something in the Forks area, even though I knew a teaching position would be hard to come by there. I sent out as many feelers and resumes as possible and was elated when I received the call from Mr. Green. I came down for the interview on a Wednesday and by Friday I was packing up my things.

My grandparents had willed the house to my parents. They'd originally thought to sell it, but instead, remodeled it and gave it to me as my graduation present, making sure to tell me that they, and my grandparents, were extremely proud of my successes. I was pretty elated, knowing I would be living in the house that I had so many great memories in.

It was easy for me to cut my ties with Seattle and move back to Forks after everything that had taken place. My parents were going to be close enough for as many visits as I wanted but I would be able to start over.

A week before my big move I called Angela to give her the good news. She surprised me by asking to be my roommate. For years we'd talked about living together after my graduation; she even brought it up during her visit to Seattle last Christmas. But I thought she and her long-time boyfriend, Ben Cheney, would be living together by now. The two of them have been dating since high school and are completely in love and adorable.

My parents helped me move my things from Seattle to Forks at the start of this summer. I was excited I would be able to spend time there getting settled and hanging out with Ang before the school year started.

And then a few days ago Mr. Green asked if I would be interested in co-coaching the cheer squad, having noticed I'd cheered at Prep. I didn't want to seem ungrateful for my new job and happily accepted. I figured if not me, they'd stick an elderly teacher in the slot and I hated that thought. He sent me your contact information and here we are.

-0-

Rachel is wide eyed, but so engrossed in my story that it takes her a moment to realize I've stopped talking. She frowns slightly, "I don't like this Carter person. He seems like an ass. You deserve way better than a cheating jerk like that."

I shrug my shoulders, not wanting to comment on Carter.

"So what have you been doing other than getting settled in this big house."

I have to laugh, "It really is a big house. Great for a family, but a little too much for two single girls, one of whom is gone a lot."

Rachel nods, but doesn't say anything.

I smile, remembering her question, "In my free time I've begun to read the stockpile of books I've collected over the past few years. I also began working out, lifting free weights to tone my arms and running daily. I can't lie, Carter's past comments about my weight stuck in the back of my mind but mostly, I'm doing it for me. I wanted to get into shape and really, after I started a routine, I found I enjoyed working out."

"Good for you! I love running, you should come join me on the beach some time."

"Really? I'd love to," I nod and smile.

"I also planted a small vegetable garden in the back and placed pots of flowers out front. I think it makes the house look like someone really _lives_ here again. In the evenings I love to sit in the swing on the screened in back porch and look out over the yard or curl up and read."

I smile thinking about being in this house. It still sends a thrill through me knowing this place is all mine. That it's now _my_ home. My life may not be exactly like I had hoped, with marriage and children, but I have so many blessings to count.

-0-

School has been in session for a few weeks now and I can't believe how much I'm enjoying myself.

A couple of days ago Rachel and I were discussing our classes over lunch. I mentioned to her I'd like to explore more of the local area, that I was especially interested in the local tribe. I knew La Push was probably rich in culture and legends and I found it extremely fascinating. Rachel casually told me her father is a Quileute elder and that she'd see if he would set something up for me. I felt bad using my connection with her for my gain, but I was too excited to refuse her. That night Rachel invited me to dinner at the diner with her and Paul. She gave me the happy news that Billy, her father, had agreed to speak with me on Saturday.

Paul and Rachel seemed to be the perfect pair, as far as I could judge. He teased her endlessly and she returned his attentions in kind. It was obvious they loved one another deeply and I couldn't help but smile watching the two of them. Paul was huge, both tall and broad, but not fat, he looked like he was all muscle, a strong and handsome, _man_. He had a good natured personality and I was immediately at ease in his presence. I had a fantastic time at dinner with them. We lingered for a while, talking about work and our families before taking our leave.

I was so anxious about my visit to the reservation I could barely sleep and woke at dawn Saturday morning. I'd hoped to spend a little time with Angie this morning but she must have stayed the night at Ben's again. She'd been staying the night at his place more frequently the past week. We've only seen one another in passing once since last Friday. I don't begrudge her the happiness she's found with Ben, for sure. But I do find myself wishing I had someone to spend my time with. Not necessarily a boyfriend, but at least a friend.

So now here I sit at my kitchen table, chewing thoughtfully on a bite of Lucky Charms while I fiddle with the 'toy' from the box. It's a friendship bracelet with a dozen beautiful, bright colors intertwined. I place my spoon in my empty bowl and wrap the bracelet around my wrist, tying it gently.

I glance over at the clock on the stove and realize I'd better get moving. I'm meeting Rachel at a car repair shop in La Push and she's going to lead me to Billy's house so I don't get lost; since I have zero sense of direction.

I clear away my morning breakfast dishes and move to my bedroom to dress. Jeans, a t-shirt and hiking boots and I pull my long strawberry blonde hair into a ponytail, my weekend wardrobe staple. On the weekdays I might be girlie, but on the weekend I like to relax and be low key - one more thing that proves to me I wasn't meant to be with Carter. I was definitely not the 'trophy wife' type of girl, which is what he was looking for. He wanted arm candy; I am definitely not some brainless bimbo.

I grab my camera - my _baby_, and leave the house a little bit early, planning to stop at different places around La Push before meeting up with Rachel.

I drive across the Forks/La Push line and immediately the atmosphere is different. There is a feeling I can't quite explain. My Camaro, an impractical car in this climate, trudges along slowly. I'm in no hurry now that I'm actually here. I want to take it all in, not miss any of the beautiful scenery.

La Push is a quiet place, not overly showy and definitely a 'simple' community. It is sparsely covered in small houses and not many businesses. That doesn't take away from the magical feeling I get just by being here. I feel like I'm a part of this land and I wonder if I'm the only newcomer that has crossed the line and felt this way.

I pass a few small businesses before I see the garage with a sign plastered over the door. It reads "HWService" in large letters and "Hot Wheels Service" in small print below. I spot several guys, including Paul, just as they walk out of the building. I notice Rachel approach them and wrap her arms around Paul, who smiles happily and kisses the top of her head. The rest of guys are all as massive as Paul is. "So I guess it's not just him that is the size of a house," I whisper to myself.

I pull over in front of the building across the street from where they are standing and climb out of my car. My eyes roam over the face of each man, most of them laughing happily. They are all native; dark hair and eyes, with beautiful copper skin. My eyes travel to one of the guys and he's frowning. _The jokes must be at his expense_, I think to myself as I walk across the road, toward them.

There is scuffling back and forth between two of them, Paul and someone I don't know. I laugh quietly as I watch them. I've always been amused by the guy-friend dynamic. It makes me wish I had brothers when I see them interact.

I lift my hand to wave, to catch Rachel's attention. But just as I reach the back of the line of cars parked in the lot of the garage, I freeze. Paul is shaking and the guy he was play fighting with pushes Rachel behind his back protectively. I don't have time to take my eyes off of him and to look at his companions. Everything starts happening in slow motion.

His vibrating body looks strange to my eyes, like he's having some sort of odd seizure. I see Rachel reach out around the mountain that is standing in front of her and Paul backs away while another tall male moves toward him, arms spread wide. I can see his mouth moving but I don't make out the words because my body and my mind are frozen with fear. I don't even know what's going on but my instincts are screaming at me to run and don't look back.

My legs begin to shake from the inside out and I can't tear my eyes away from Paul. His face begins to change and it no longer appears completely human. My eyes travel down his body and I notice it looks like he's growing and his clothes are coming apart at the seams. The slow motion stops suddenly and Paul appears to explode in front of my face. In his place, there in front of me, he transforms into -

_Surely my eyes are playing tricks on me. Maybe I need to have my contacts replaced._

_He's turned into a massive silver animal?_

I blink several times over and over, trying to make sense of what I'm seeing. The other guys surround Paul - a wolf? My brain is still trying to catch up. I don't even have time to process anything because I'm being swept up into arms that I didn't even see coming . I look over my rescuers shoulder, back at the group of people, trying to see more even though I'm freaked out by what _might _be in front of my face.

_A man, just turned into a gigantic wolf. In front of me. Surely I didn't see__ that.__ I must be dreaming. _

_It's the only explanation._

Suddenly I'm pulled tightly to a rock hard chest. Arms wrap tightly around my waist and someone lifts me off of my feet just as my knees begin to give way. I hadn't even realized they I was falling. He's whisking me away before I can even protest. He runs with me in his arms, whispering words my brain doesn't absorb but I can feel the vibration of his chest.

Just as quickly as he carried me away he stops and sits down. I'm shaking like a leaf and I can't pull air into my lungs. All I can tell myself is 'Don't pass out'. I don't risk lifting my face where it's buried in his chest. I need time to calm my nerves before I can even look up at him.

He is rocking me back and forth in his lap. I feel pressure on the top of my head and his hand moving up and down my back. My heart begins to slow it's racing beat. I start taking deep breaths once I'm finally able to make my lungs function. I am oddly, immediately, comforted by his touch, his scent. I wait for several minutes before I feel like I'm capable of actually moving. I lift my head to look at him when I hear people approaching us rather loudly. My hands are gripping his shirt tightly, my knuckles white and my fingers cramping from being clenched so tight.

I look up at him and can't control the gasp that comes out. He has beautiful russet colored skin, short shiny jet black hair and deep dark brown eyes - All things that now that I'm so close to him, I can see more clearly. I can't force myself to look away from him. All of the men were handsome from afar but up close, he is breathtaking.

A flush begins to creep up my neck when his hands begin to move from my back to my sides, brushing the sides of my breasts. I feel like I'm running a high grade fever and it has nothing to do with what I've just seen. No, that is the furthest thing from my mind now. It is all about this huge man that has taken me away. _This has never happened to me before_. I have never had such an immediate reaction to a man, especially not a stranger.

I stammer out words that probably don't even make sense. I am pretty sure my brain isn't connected to my mouth. He has melted my senses. My eyes drift to his mouth and when his tongue flicks out to glide along his bottom lip I want to lean in and kiss him. I don't know him - _But God I want to_. Thinking _that_, doesn't help. I'm overwhelmed by both what I've seen and now by what I'm feeling. It doesn't make sense - How can I be so scared one second and so connected to someone the next when I can't even comprehend what I've seen?

His arms adjust me in his lap when he beings to talk to me. He tells me Billy is coming and he will explain everything. I can't figure out what he means at first and then I realize that he is saying that Billy will explain what happened to Paul. My brain is so disjointed that each thought I have is scrambled.

I don't answer him right away and he tightens his arms around me, trying to comfort me further. I gasp when he pulls me closer because I feel something hard against my butt. I frown slightly until I realize what it is I'm feeling. He's _hard_. And it is most definitely not something in his pocket. He's turned on. _Because of me? Impossible._ I don't even know how to act. I have never had someone have this reaction to me this quickly - ever. Not Carter, not anyone.

I'm overwhelmed by the desire I'm feeling coursing off of him and into me. It's coming in waves and I want to feel more, I _need_ to feel more. I move against him on instinct, something I didn't really know I had until now. I don't know what it is I'm seeking. Maybe I want him to react even more or maybe I want him to tell me to stop because we are complete strangers. _Except I don't feel so much like he's a stranger_. Just one more twist of my hips and I'll stand up. Possibly.

I can't force myself to glance at the loud group coming toward us. I vaguely make out the sound of Rachel's voice, calling my name. Instead of looking in her direction I focus on the dark brown eyes staring back at me. They are wide, mirroring my own and then suddenly, his expression changes to anger. Someone places a hand on his shoulder and he pushes me away, practically dumping me on the ground in his haste. My legs are still shaky beneath me and he has to help me stand. This doesn't make sense. His face had been dipping toward mine and then suddenly he can't wait to get away from me. I move a few steps back, stumbling into someone else.

There is a deep male voice in my ear, barking out orders gruffly to everyone and then Rachel is by my side tugging my arm gently, asking me to follow her. I don't want to take my eyes off of my saviors face. I trip over tree roots and rocks as we walk from the beach and across a wooded area, away from the main road. There are houses scattered along the way, small and homey looking. I notice that most of them have flowers and gardens in their slight backyards.

I look around at the strangers surrounding me. If the men looked big earlier, they look gigantic now that I see them all up close. I glance at the one that picked me up and I see him staring at me, eyes squinting into slits. I turn my head quickly, rubbing my chin on my shoulder and allowing my loosened hair to fall into my face. I'm not quite sure what I did to piss him off, but it must be something huge.

We approach a small red house and everyone slows their walk for a man in a wheelchair to roll himself up a ramp and onto the porch. I stop while they all continue their journey and Rachel pauses next to me, speaking quietly into my ear.

"Come on, Lillah. This is Daddy's house and he'll explain everything," she takes my hand in hers and squeezes it gently. As I look toward the house I don't take my eyes off of the back of my saviors head. He walks through the front door and just before he disappears, he turns his head slightly and glares at me. _What the hell?_

"R- Rach, what happened?," I stammer at her, turning my body away from the house. I tell myself to remember to thank her later. To thank her for being my friend and for standing by me while I have a mental break down because I'm pretty sure that at some point, I will. Hell, maybe I'm having one right now. Maybe this is all an illusion. Except, I know it's not because I can still feel the heat of a strong male body and his scent is still in my nose.

"I think that it would be best if you listen to what Dad has to say."

Rachel nods her head toward the house and I turn to see a beautiful middle age woman standing alone, waiting anxiously on the porch. I glance back at Rachel and slowly nod my head and we go up the stairs. She introduces me to Sue Clearwater, a tribal elder and we both follow her into the house.

-0-

Billy's living room is small and barely fits bodies of the 'normal' size. The over-sized men that fill it make it seem like a doll house. I look around the room, surprised I'm even able to take it all in. It's a nice place, simple but comfortable. I feel instantly relaxed.

As I look around I peer into the faces of everyone gathered, nodding to each of them in turn even though none of them speak. Every man that meets my eyes is incredibly gorgeous. It's unreal. It's like I'm trapped in a movie. _Last of the Mohicans_, perhaps? Or maybe _Dances with Wolves_?

I notice there is a new female and she's sitting next to a male. I realize he is 'Deep Voice' from the beach when he says "hello". The female's face is scarred on one side but she's breathtakingly beautiful. She has the same beautiful skin the others do but it's her eyes that really draw me in. They are soft and friendly. Deep Voice has her pulled into his side tightly and she smiles faintly at me. I find myself hoping I'll have the opportunity to talk to her later. My eyes slide from her back to the face of Deep Voice and he's frowning deeply, looking to his right. He doesn't even look at me anymore and that makes me nervous all over again.

My eyes automatically drift in that direction and I see Rachel's Paul, kneeling on the floor. He has much the same look on his face, along with one that is a little pained when his eyes meet mine. Rachel skirts past me, touching my back as she moves. She goes to Paul and he pulls her down to sit on his bent leg. She kisses his cheek and wraps her arms around his waist, seeming to comfort him.

Still I glance a little further down the line and there is another face, looking just as angry. This face is young and handsome and I picture him smiling and carefree. I realize he's the guy in the other picture on Rachel's desk at school. Her brother, Jacob. I follow his line of sight and make it to yet one more face. This one unfamiliar but he seems to be more relaxed and he smiles at me just a little, much the way Deep Voice's girl did. Then he quickly glances to the right with everyone else. _What in the world is going on?_

I realize most of the house is full of men. Huge men that could become angry that I'm here. Men that could very well turn into what ever creature it was Paul became. It puts me on edge and I begin to ask myself if I'm going to end up getting killed here, in this house full of strangers. My knees start shaking all over again.

I feel Rachel reaching up and tugging my hand gently but I can't tear my eyes away from who is next in the circle. It's "Cranky Pants", as I've dubbed him. Everyone is glaring at the hulk of a man that picked me up and carried me away. I don't get it. One would think that the anger would be more directed at the one that turned into - well, what he turned into, instead of being directed at my knight in shining armor, as it were.

Cranky Pants is glaring at me again when I meet his blazing eyes. I bite down on my bottom lip and my brow wrinkles in thought. I am over taken by a need to go to him, to make sure he's 'okay'. I want to comfort him like the other females are doing with their mates. The thought is absolutely ridiculous because I'm the one that should be upset. Not to mention, he's a complete stranger. I start to open my mouth to apologize for whatever infraction I've committed because he looks so pissed at me. I'm interrupted by a throat clearing behind me and I slowly turn around.

-0-

Sue Clearwater introduces the man in the wheel chair. He is Billy Black and now that I can study his face, I see the resemblance between him, Rachel and Jacob. The young guy that smiled at me grabs his chair and moves it next to Billy, who forces me to sit even though I politely decline. When I respectfully do as he asks my right leg begins to bounce instantly and my hands clench into fists on top of my thighs. I can feel all eyes on me as I look down into my lap.

A rough hand covers one of my fists and pats gently and awkwardly, trying to put me at ease. On my left, I hear my name spoken by the voice I now know belongs to Sue. She reaches out and touches my back, rubbing it soothingly. I glance over at her, giving her a half hearted smile, hoping the worried look on her face disappears. I don't know her at all but I don't want to see her distressed.

Taking a deep breath I close my eyes and turn my head to Billy before opening them again. I can't manage to look at anyone else in the room, especially Paul and Cranky Pants. I'm afraid I might have some sort of freak out session. The latter seems like a likely option because I'm pretty sure I've already lost my mind completely.

I nod at Billy, letting him know I'm open to listening to whatever it is that he has to say. I'm really hoping, in the back of my mind, that he's going to pinch me and I'm going to wake up from the most bizarre dream I've ever had.

But no, that doesn't happen. "You should know that our people are proud of our heritage. We pass down legends from generation to generation. I want to share with you some of them to help you better understand what you've witnessed," Billy begins in his strong voice.

And that's where it begins. Billy and Sue both proceed to blow my mind even more, telling me things I never thought to hear come out of the mouths of rational people.

I stare back and forth between them, a blank look on my face. I am unable to really believe any of this but I don't really see why they would come up with a huge fabricated tale either. Billy pats my hand a few more times and looks into my eyes, trying to gauge whether or not I'm going to run screaming, I'm sure. He talks for what is probably hours but I lose all sense of time while listening to him.

The part of my brain that loves to learn things, that loves history, is wrapped up in his tales. The rational part of my brain is having a bit more trouble with the idea that grown men shape-shift into wolves to protect their tribe and their land from _vampires_. As Billy and Sue's stories come to an end they both spend the last few minutes making sure I understand how important it is for me to keep this a secret.

Like I'd go spouting to the few people I do know. They'd surely think I'm insane if I even uttered the words 'werewolf' or 'shape-shifter'. I almost blurt out my thoughts but I don't want to offend them any more than I possibly already have. I try to assure both Billy and Sue and the room at large that I'm not about to tell their secret. I see them relax and nod at me in acknowledgment. All of them except for Cranky Pants, that is. He just continues to glare.

When I meet his eyes again I feel my temperature rising automatically, the same way it did when I looked into his eyes on the beach. I move my hands back and forth across my thighs in agitation and then up to my hair. I can only imagine the catastrophe on top of my head. I pull the hair tie out and pull it back up with crisp, studied movements. Cranky Pants frown grows even deeper and he turns away from me, looking at Deep Voice and then down at the floor.

"Do you have any questions?" Sue's voice grabs my attention and I look over at her and smile weakly.

"No, I don't think so. Maybe I will later?" I hesitate only briefly.

"Of course, dear. You are welcome to come to me or Billy with any questions. I'm sure that Rachel would be happy to help you as well."

"Thank you, for everything. I know how hard it is for all of you to share something like this with an outsider. I promise, I won't let any of you down," I tell her earnestly and look around the room again, hoping that they believe me. I hear Cranky Pants sigh deeply, he is still looking at the floor but I imagine him rolling his eyes at my oath. While everyone else might trust my word, he clearly does not.

Abruptly, Rachel stands from Paul's lap and tugs the hand of Deep Voice's girl. Rachel swoops over to me, grabs my hand and jerks me toward the front door, pulling me out onto the porch before I can stop her.

"Rachel, what are you doing?" I demand in a shaky voice.

"We're going for a walk, just us girls," she explains in a 'duh' tone and nods her head toward the other long haired woman. "This is Emily Uley, she's Sam's wife and we're going to explain a few things that Billy left out. Now, come on."

Rachel jerks her head in the direction of the beach that we'd come from.

"Okay, okay! God, you're pushy," I grumble as I follow behind Rachel. Leave it to Rachel to act like this is an every day occurrence.

A little giggle escapes Emily's mouth and I grin shyly at her as we walk along.

"She's gotten her moxie back, Rach. I think she'll be okay."

Rachel stops abruptly and then leads us to the right. I follow her quietly, not having a clue where it is she's leading us.

"Yeah, I think she'll be just fine."

We finally stop, mostly because Emily sighs loudly and tells Rachel we don't have to go to China to talk.

"Rachel, do you care to explain what it is that you feel like I need to know? What else could Billy have possibly left out?" I ask. Now that I'm away from the guys and with just Rachel and Emily, I'm feeling like I can ask questions and talk.

Rachel drops down on the ground and Emily and I follow suit. I look at both girls, waiting patiently for them to expand on the story. I have a feeling this is going to be a doozy. Nothing compared to what Billy told me already, although it is pretty mind blowing. Rachel nods at Emily, who smiles at me and then begins to explain something she calls "imprinting".

I stare at Emily and Rachel, a theme I'm noticing is happening a lot with this group.

"Lillah, I'm Sam's imprintee and Rachel, she's Paul's. Imprintees and their wolves have a connection that is beyond just a normal human relationship. It is sometimes an instant connection, when you first meet - Other times, it takes a while. For Sam and I, it was the first," Emily pauses in thought and then continues, "For Jared and Kim, who you have not officially met yet, it took a bit of time. There is no real 'rule' for that part of imprinting. Do you understand?" she asks and I nod, my eyes wide.

"For the imprintees, it's, well, I guess the only way to explain it would be it's 'love at first sight'? But for the wolves, they become something different when they imprint. They feel bound to us, and we feel bound to them too, but for them, it's unexplainable." Emily glances at Rachel and frowns, seeming frustrated with something.

"When a wolf imprints, we are the only thing that matters to them, we are their world and they would do _anything_ to protect and care for us." Emily stares into my eyes and I feel like she's trying to communicate with me silently.

I almost tell her 'I don't get it' but she continues on, "They are our protectors and we have to be together, there is no question of that. We can never be apart because if we are, it feels as if half of our heart, our soul, is missing." Her voice drops to a quiet murmur. "It is much deeper than just being in love with someone."

Emily continues explaining as best she can but she keeps telling me it's not easy for someone else to understand. I thank her over and over even though I don't really get why she's explaining all of this to me. We sit in our little circle on the ground talking quietly about the wolves and shape-shifting and the reasons they are here, when I feel like someone is looking at me.

I lift my head, looking over the tops of Emily and Rachel's and stare unblinking at the edge of a line of trees. There is a wolf standing there. At first I assume it's Paul and he's watching over Rachel. Then I notice he has a darker colored fur, deep grey. There is some part of me, deep down inside that is talking to me. I just _know_ it's Cranky Pants as soon as his eyes lock with mine. We stare at one another in recognition and I feel the heat and flush rising on my chest again before he turns away.

_What is happening to me? How could I recognize him so easily? _I want to see him again, I want to taste his lips. I want him completely and I don't even know his name. This is something I've never experienced. The question is, what the hell do I do now?

-0-

**A/N:** So there we have it. Chapter 1. We really hope that you enjoyed it. Feel free to leave feedback and a review! Next up: Embry's POV!!


	2. Chapter 2 Nothing You Ever Planned On

**Chapter 2 "Nothing You Ever Planned On" **

**Disclaimer: **We don't own anything that SM wrote (characters or plot lines). We do own a killer sports car that would make all the wolves at the shop drool. Oh, and we own Lillah and assface Carter. And Eli, who you'll meet at the end of this chapter. That's about it.

**A/N: Sorry for the delay. We'd planned to post this sooner but life got in the way ;) **An extra special _THANK YOU_ to the awesomest beta ever. She deals with our horrible run on sentences, horrid grammar and repeated "hey, we changed stuff, beta this version instead". We love us some dailyicandy. Any mistakes are our own.

_It's a shame that I would pretend __  
__Before making amends __  
__It's a shame that I can't __  
__But nothing you've ever planned on __  
__Ever turned out __  
__But nothing you've ever planned on __  
__Ever turned out the way you planned __  
_"Close Your Eyes to See" - Circa Survive

**EPOV**

It's another beautiful day; if it wasn't so rare here, I'd almost be sick of it. But sunny and 75 is a rare combination in La Push, so my friends and I are heading out for some cliff diving this afternoon. Thankfully, our boss, Sam, has no qualms about shutting the shop down early, even on a Saturday, so we can all enjoy the last few days of summer. We're lucky it has stayed so warm through September. Usually by now it's down in the fifties with rain, rain, and more rain.

Nothing beats spending the last few days of an Indian summer, on the Quileute Reservation, cliff diving with my friends.

We are waiting for Rachel to join us outside Sam's shop; as we wait, the guys start in on their favorite topic: my dating life.

"So who'd you sleep with last night, Embry?" Jared smirks at me as he nudges Paul.

Paul quickly follows Jared's comment with one of his own, "Yeah man, what poor lady's heart did you break last night?"

"Guys, really," finally, Sam, the voice of reason jumps in to save me. _At least that's what I thought_ until he continues, "Why do you assume he only broke _one _girl's heart last night?"

I turn to Jacob, since I know he can't NOT say something, "Guys, lay off of Embry. It's not his fault he hasn't imprinted yet. I mean, we already took all the best girls! What's the old saying, Embry has to fuck a lot of frogs before he can imprint?"

I watch the four of them crack up and hit each other as they laugh at their own jokes. When they finally settle down I count off, "First, jealous? Second, I never kiss and tell. Third, I don't sleep around, I am very honest and upfront with the women I date. And finally, I don't date these women so I can find an imprintee. Now, I know this is shocking to you pussy whipped fools, but some of us don't want to imprint. I'm quite happy with my life just as it is."

Jacob straightens up and tries to compose himself, "Man, Embry, trust me when I say, it happens whether you want it to or not. It's not like you can control imprinting. It just...happens."

Sam turns to me with a frown on his face, "Yeah man, imprinting isn't a choice, and it's amazing. To have someone that is just _perfect_ for you; your soul mate. Well, there's nothing like it, I don't care how many women you 'date'."

I shake my head as I listen to the same shit they've been spouting for years now. I would argue with them, but really, it's a waste of breath. They are all so absorbed in their women; they can't understand how I can be happy without someone in my life. I don't need the responsibility of someone depending on me to take care of them, not anymore. My taking care of a woman stopped the day my mom lost her battle with breast cancer.

Now I just want to enjoy my life, part of that is enjoying beautiful women. Many of the benefits of being a wolf make me attractive to the opposite sex: tall, strong, and what they all described as 'ruggedly handsome'. I assume that's a nice way to say 'poor but hot'.

While I'm not poor, I don't need a lot in life to survive. But all the women I've dated are the same, shallow and only concerned about money and sex, in that order. They see my thirty-five year old truck, my grease stained t-shirts and jeans and they assume I have nothing except a big dick.

Of course, I do, have a big dick that is. I've never had any complaints, but lately, this assumption had begun to really eat at me. It would be nice to be appreciated for more than just the good time we can both have.

Even worse, recently I noticed I'm not having that much of a good time. Yeah the sex was good, and I always made sure both my partner and I were 'satisfied', but it was becoming almost routine. When the need struck, I would go to a bar in a nearby town, sit quietly until, inevitably, some woman would approach me. We would go back to their place, I'd make sure we both got off, and leave. Never to see her again.

Since becoming a wolf, I've never had to chase a woman; they have all happily approached me. I've always been very honest and upfront with these women. All I want is the one night, and without fail, they agree.

But never, with any of those women, have I felt like they respect me. Oh sure, they wanted it, but that was all. I was simply scratching the itch we both had. As much as I hate to admit it to myself, it is starting to wear on me. I'd like to actually be respected by a woman.

_I have to stop talking to Rachel, Kim, and Emily_. I love the imprintees like they are my sisters, but they are getting in my head. They are turning me into a chick, thinking about respect, Jesus!

I shake myself from this thought to hear Paul mention a new friend of Rachel's that she wants to introduce me to. Paul informs me that Rachel thinks it would be 'fun' if we could all double date. I roll my eyes, looking at Rachel questioningly as she joins our group, "Another double date, Rach? Why can't you just let me be single and happy?"

"This friend is different, Embry. I have a feeling you'd really like her. She's smart, funny, and beautiful. Besides, how can you be happy single? Who's going to take care of you when you are old and grey?" Rachel smiles wide at me as she attaches herself to Paul.

I chuckle and can't resist, "Rachel, you've seen me phase, I'm already grey, I just need to get old."

"I actually have to back Rachel up on this one man, her friend is _hot_." Paul laughs loudly when Rachel playfully smacks his arm for his comment.

Rachel turns back to me, rolling her eyes at my lame joke, "You know what I mean. I just want you to be as happy as the rest of us are."

For some reason, this statement by Rachel sets Jacob off, "Happy? Is that what you call it?"

Paul's hands start shaking before Jacob even stops speaking, "What the fuck is your problem, Jacob? We aren't doing anything wrong. I love her, she loves me, we are getting married in the spring, what the hell do you want from me?"

I look at Sam and Jared, knowing this is turning ugly quick. Jacob steps forward, getting in Paul's face, "I want to stop seeing you fucking my sister when we patrol. Can't you keep it in your pants for a few more months? I don't want to see that in my head or to see my sister walking down the aisle about to burst with your baby!"

Sam, Jared and I circle around Paul and Jacob. We can all tell Paul is on edge, his entire body shaking. He growls at Jacob, saying through clenched teeth, "We aren't fucking idiots, Jacob, we use protection. You're precious sister won't be pregnant. Have a little fucking faith in me!"

Before he can even finish his statement, Jacob is grabbing Rachel and pulling her away from Paul and behind his body. Sam, Jared and I tense and move in front of Jacob, more to protect Rachel than Jacob, because we all know what is coming next.

And then it happens, Paul phases right in front of the shop, his clothes exploding as the wolf takes over.

Over the sound of Paul snapping at Jacob and the others trying to calm Paul down, I hear a small gasp. I look up to see a stunning strawberry-blonde move her hand from what looks like a wave to cover her mouth. I turn back and realize she has her eyes locked on the massive silver wolf that is Paul. When I look back at her, she is blinking rapidly, as if she's trying to clear the image from her mind.

Moving on instinct only I start running towards her. I'm scared I won't make it to her in time; that Paul, in wolf form, will beat me to her. I have to protect her. My mind is screaming as I run faster and harder than I ever have in my life; _No! Not her! I have to get to her. She can't get hurt. I need her safe. Please let me reach her in time. Please don't let Paul attack her_.

It's like I'm moving in slow motion and will never reach her. Then she's finally in front of me, close enough for me to touch. I pull her into my arms just as I see her starting to sink to her knees. I pick her up easily, since she weighs next to nothing, and run towards First Beach. I mumble against her ear as I run, "Shhh, it's ok. I've got you now. Don't worry. _Please _baby stop shaking, I promise it will be ok. You're safe now, I promise."

I find a driftwood tree and sit down quickly, holding this tiny woman against my chest, rocking her back and forth. I alternate between tucking her head under my chin and gently running my lips across the top of her head as my hands caress her back. Her body is quivering and it sounds like she can't inhale deeply enough, I think she's hyperventilating.

Several minutes pass before I feel her start to calm down, her breathing becomes a little more even. She lifts her head from my chest to rest it against my shoulder, and begins to loosen her death grip on my shirt. She speaks as her hands slowly, gently, smooth out my shirt, "Thank you. I- what happened back there?"

I take a breath to respond to her question but can't continue as her scent overwhelms me. My nose suddenly has a direct connection to my dick, the more I inhale her scent, the harder I become. That's when my other senses kick in; I feel the silky softness of her hair against my chin, the heat of her sudden blush against my neck, the swell of her breasts as, without realizing it, my hands have moved from her back to her sides. I've been attracted to women before, but nothing like this; so swiftly, and just by her scent, her touch.

I adjust her in my lap, trying to calm down, not wanting to scare her with my raging hard on. I hear the others coming our way but I can't focus on them. I feel the heat rising on her skin, against her shirt. I smell her body chemistry begin to change. I know, without even seeing her that she is just as turned on as I am. She shifts slightly and I feel her soft ass brush against my rock hard dick. _Shit._

Except, instead of freaking her out, it turns her on more. Her hands are moving lower down my chest, she's twisting in my arms so that my hands are now very nearly cupping her full breasts and her lips, oh her lips. She mumbling things and as she speaks her lips are moving against my neck, teasing me with the softness that I want to feel crushed against my own.

But before I can do anything more, I hear my friends approaching. I can tell it's more than just our little group from before, I hear Sue with them and Billy calling after everyone to bring us both back to his house for an emergency tribal meeting with the elders.

"They are coming now, everyone, they'll be here shortly. Billy will explain everything to you." I lean back, taking her chin in my hand to lift her face so I can look her in the eyes, explain that everything really will be ok. I also want to tell her that I would love to continue what we have started here, later, after the meeting. _Because, God do I want to see her again; I need to see her again._

But I don't say any of these thing, because the instant our eyes connect, I'm hit with it. I see in her eyes what I didn't realize was going on while I was saving her. It dawns on me, the reason I needed to get to her so fast. I'm truly fucked, I've just lost all control over my life.

This woman, this tiny, pale, beautiful red-headed woman is the one woman I never wanted to meet. The one woman that can, and will, destroy my life. In that instant I know who she is, even though I've never met her before. I don't know her name but I know her.

She's my imprintee.

-0-

I can't move, time seems to stand still. I'm lost in her grey eyes. I see her soul, and I know, without a question, this woman is mine, she was made for me alone. If I just lean forward, let my lips touch hers as they are dying to, she will follow me. She needs me just as I need her.

But as I start to lean forward, the selfish side of me screams: _I never wanted this! _

And I didn't. I never wanted to be tied to another woman again. Never wanted my life to be about making sure someone else was happy and comfortable. _I like my life, damnit! _How dare she come around and ruin it.

It's too much, I can't think with her sitting here on my lap, my whole body telling me to hold her, claim her, posses her. The rational part of my mind fights my body, forcing those limbs to move against what they are screaming to do. I'm able to push her off of my lap and into a standing position, not so gently. I can tell she is still unstable on her legs, but thankfully Sam has arrived and she is able to lean back into him. I stand up and adjust myself, looking down as the rest of the group arrives.

"What the hell was that all about? What did she see? Jesus Christ, Paul! You have got to learn to fucking control your anger! And you, Embry. You know the rules, what the fuck were you thinking? Come on, Billy wants to see us at his house right away, damage control, tell her the legends, swear her to secrecy. Shit this sucks." Sam is pissed, and not just at Paul. It's almost like _I _am the one that has done something wrong. I'm not the one that phased in front of an outsider, a complete stranger. I saved her life. I _had _to save her life.

I can't look Sam in the eye as he continues to chew my ass out; not because I agree with what he is saying, but because he'll know right away what has happened. I don't want him to know; I don't want any of them to know that I've...I've…_I can't even say it._

Rachel steps into the small space I've forced between the red-head and I. Rachel gently tugs her hand, pulling her away from me. I want to reach out and grab her, tell Rachel to stop, _she's mine_, but I don't. I can't.

I watch as everyone starts walking towards Billy's house. We take the shorter route through the woods so we can avoid the main roads and make better time. I bring up the rear of the group; feeling her eyes on me every time she looks back. I don't think anyone else notices, but I do. Feeling her eyes on me again I can't help but look up; her eyes appear worried and questioning my reaction. She shouldn't have been there, she shouldn't have been forced into this…_reality._ I know without question that she deserves, and is accustomed to, better than what I could ever provide her.

This thought fuels my anger more as we walk into Billy's house. I turn back to glare at her, still standing next to Rachel. _Who the hell decided she is the one for me_? I can tell, despite her jeans and t-shirt, this woman has never had to work hard for anything in her life; whatever she wants has been given to her.

I take my place in the circle of chairs in Billy's living room. Keeping my head down, but feeling everyones eyes on me. Without looking, I feel her as soon as she enters the room with Rachel and Sue. Sue goes to sit next to Billy while Rachel aims for Paul. _He's the idiot that caused all this._ I know everyone is angry with Paul, but they are also angry at my actions, taking her away like that. They want an explanation but I can't give them one without revealing what has happened.

I can tell for a moment she isn't watching me, so I chance looking up. I see Emily curled against Sam, giving her a small smile. Of course Emily would welcome her. Then there's Rachel and Paul, Rachel comforting the idiot. _He really doesn't deserve someone as wonderful as Rachel._ But seeing them supporting their men, I am instantly jealous of what Sam and Paul have. I want to pull her away from Rachel, onto my lap. I want her comforting me as much as I want to be comforting her. I want to stand up and protect her; _I want her to stand up for me and by me_. What am I thinking? I don't want that from her, I don't want it from anyone.

Besides, no one has ever stood up for me. Sure, Jake, as my alpha, has my back but other than my mom, I've been on my own for most of my life. I've never needed anyone. I've never wanted anyone else in my life, until the second our eyes met. That is the reason I am angry. As she turns to look at me again I feel hatred pouring off of me, floating towards her. I hate being angry, but in that moment I hate her more. I hate her because I know I need her and I want her by my side. _Always_.

-0-

Jared, ever the chivalrous one of our group, offers her his chair, moving to the back of the cramped living room. She at first refuses but then settles down between Billy and Sue in the now vacated chair. I watch both of them attempt to comfort her before they begin. I tune out as Billy tells the stories that I've heard so many times over the years.

I'm focused on her reactions. Thankfully Billy doesn't mention imprinting this time. Normally he does, but not today. I wonder if he's left it out on purpose. _Does he already know?_

He can't, none of the guys can be aware. All they know is that I'm acting out of character. I'm sure I can blow them all off after the meeting by just saying that I haven't phased in a while and I'm antsy; that they can all understand that. Plus, I was worried about a stranger seeing Paul phase. Both are valid reasons for my actions, but neither are the truth.

She seems to handle the stories ok, considering. She makes a little speech about keeping our secret. I can tell everyone else is relieved at this. Not me.

I look up at her just as she blushes again, her cheeks turning pink as our eyes meet. She pulls her hair back and I'm hit so hard with my need for her that it catches me off guard. It takes everything in me to stay seated. I fight my body's urge to cross the small room and take her in my arms. I force myself to turn away from her. I can't look at her any longer, I hate her for making me want her.

I turn to the next safest face, Sam. Only, he isn't so safe. He stares at me, his eyes burning with questions, before he turns to her and then back to me. His eyes narrow with suspicion. I shake my head only for him to see before looking away again, my gaze returning to the safety of the floor. I sigh, hoping that Sam hasn't guessed the truth. _I don't want this. _

Sue asks if the red-head has any questions. Thankfully she doesn't right now, but "maybe later". She once again promises that she won't let any of us down, that she'll keep our secret. Everyone else may feel relieved by her words, but I know she is a liability to the tribe. It would be one thing if I were to accept her as my...but no, on her own like this, she's a risk to all of us.

Rachel quickly stands up and grabs first Emily's, and then her, hand. The three of them rush out of Billy's house. As soon as they leave, everyone starts in on me. _Fuck my life._

"Embry, what the _hell _man?! Why did you take her away? You know when something like this happens we have to bring them straight to the elders." Sam, as always, is the first to lay into me.

Jacob, thankfully has my back, "Sam, calm down, this isn't Embry's fault. I'm sure she was startled when she saw Paul phase. Embry, the ladies man, actually noticed and helped her, while the rest of us dealt with Paul."

I snarl at Jacob's use of 'ladies man' before Paul cuts me off, "Yeah, but why take her away? I didn't even notice her when I phased. It wasn't like she was in danger from me. What made you leave with her?" Paul asks the question I can't answer. Not without revealing the truth.

Jared chimes in finally, "Man, just because Embry is the nicest one of this group and actually was concerned about her, doesn't mean we have to jump his ass."

Billy lifts his hand for silence, "It's done now. No need to blame Embry or Paul for this. Fate wanted her to see us for what we are. For some reason she needed to know. It is not our place to question that."

Everyone grumbles but slowly gets up to leave. Even Sue heads out before I finally look up from the floor. I nearly jump when I see that Billy has rolled over right in front of where I'm sitting. He seems to be waiting patiently for me to look at him before he will speak what is on his mind.

I look up and he says what I'm dreading, "I didn't tell her about imprinting, it isn't my place. I won't tell anyone, but Embry, no matter how much you fight it, it's not going away. She is the woman for you. The others will figure out, and quickly. The more you fight it, the worse it will be."

I shake my head, "I can't Billy, not after losing my mom. Besides, you saw her. I'm sure someone like her would never want to slum with someone like me. She doesn't fit in our world."

"Embry, don't assume the worst of everyone just because you've only met the worst of humanity so far. We all know most vampires kill, but that doesn't mean there isn't a small group that can rise above, as we have all experienced. Besides, how do you know what she wants and expects? Just because she isn't one of us doesn't mean she wouldn't fit in here. She is part of our tribe now."

Billy's speech, while meaningful, doesn't sway me, "I can't Billy, there may be a few good ones out there, but I haven't met them yet. And she isn't part of our tribe. Not if I don't accept her."

Billy shakes his head, "All I'm asking is that you don't write her off, give her a chance to prove whether or not she is worthy of your acceptance. You might be surprised."

I laugh at the absurdity of what Billy is suggesting, "What, you want me to be friends with her? With my imprintee?"

Billy, like always, plays it cool, simply shrugging his shoulders and rolling back towards the kitchen, "If that is what it takes for you to give her a chance. Remember, imprinting is not just about romantic love. The best relationships have a strong foundation of friendship. Friendship seems to be working for Jacob and Renesmee. Good luck Embry."

And with that I walk out of Billy's house. None of the guys are waiting for me. I assume that after everything, they have all bailed on going to the cliffs. They are all probably curled up with their women. _Assholes_.

I'm too keyed up to go straight home to my simple apartment. I decide to head toward the cliffs. But instead of driving there as we had originally planned, I go to the other side of Billy's house and pull my clothes off, shoving them in the pouch I always have around my ankle before phasing. I'm thankful I'm the only one phased right now. I really don't need the other guys in my mind as I sift through all of this.

I start running but I'm not paying attention to where I'm going. I'm thinking about those moments on the beach before we were interrupted. How close I was to leaning forward to take her lips. How perfectly her soft, curvy body fit in my arms. How her smell overwhelmed me. _What was the deal with the connection between my nose and my dick_?

In that moment, her scent hits me again. I look up and realize that instead of the cliffs, I've followed her scent directly to the beach, not far from where we were just a few hours ago. I see her, Rachel, and Emily sitting in the sand together and I'm suddenly hit with all the things I would not let myself think in human form.

_I want to go to her in my wolf form, run my nose along her delicate neck and just inhale. I want to phase back to my human self, pick her up and take her back to the driftwood tree, let her hands run all over my body as I lose myself in her. I want to see the beautiful blush that I saw on her cheeks bloom across her entire body as she screams my name in ecstasy. I want to make her mine in every way possible. _

In my wolf form, I don't care about all the things that weigh me down as a human. In this form, I am an animal, and all I can think about is being with my mate. _I want her. I need her._

Just as this thought crosses my mind, she looks up. Instead of the fear I'm expecting, there is recognition in her eyes, like she knows it's me. _That can't be. _Then the recognition turns to desire; her cheeks flush, and I'm starting to think it's caused by me. I know I can't stand there a moment longer, or else the desires of the wolf will override the logic of the man. I can't let that happen.

I bay softly, almost a whimper, before turning away quickly and heading for my original destination, the cliffs.

-0-

I give the wolf call as I approach Sam and Emily's house a few hours later. While Jacob is my alpha, Sam and Emily's house is still the main place where we congregate. I shake my still slightly damp hair off one more time before walking in. I see Quil in the living room playing with Claire.

Claire looks up from the Barbie she and Quil are currently dressing and runs to give me a hug, "Uncle Bry! Look at the pretty dress Barbie has on. You should come play with us."

I smile at the shortened version of my name. Claire knows my name, she's eight now, she can say it, but I'll always be 'Uncle Bry' to her. "I see the pretty dress, but I think Quil is having fun, I don't want to interrupt."

Quil flips me off and I just shake my head, giving him the same response as always, "You are the one that picked a child, not me! Enjoy your Barbie's. Are Sam and Emily around?"

Claire gives me one last hug before returning to Quil. Quil points towards the kitchen, "Emily's cooking dinner, Sam's out patrolling. I think he's a little freaked after what happened today. I hear you carted some blonde off to First Beach. I thought you liked to keep your women away from the reservation."

I glare at Quil, pissed that he isn't totally off base. If the others hadn't arrived when they did, I'm not sure I would have been able to stop us from going further. But he doesn't need to know this, "Don't believe all the rumors. I was just trying to keep her from going psycho. And she wasn't blonde...more of a red-head."

Quil laughs as I head into the kitchen, calling after me, "I don't need rumors. I'll know what really happened next time we patrol together, just remember that!"

I turn the corner into the kitchen and see Emily cooking away. I smile when I see baby Eli in his bassinet. I walk over to peek in, grinning when I see his eyes are wide open. He giggles up at me as I speak in a softer voice than I normally use, "Hey buddy. How's it going?"

"Embry, it's his nap time, let him sleep. There's food on the table or you can stick around for dinner, it'll be ready shortly." Emily playfully swats at me, smiling when I roll my eyes are her attempt to 'hurt' me.

I move to the table, grabbing a muffin left over from breakfast, "How can that little guy get any sleep in here with loud mouth Quil always hanging around? You should let me babysit some time. I'll teach him all the stuff he needs to know, not that pansy crap Quil goes on about. We can watch football games together."

Emily rolls her eyes at me, "You guys and your football. Don't worry, Sam already has all of that covered. I swear, Eli came out cheering on the Seahawks. There's no way in hell I'm letting you watch my infant son without supervision, preferably a woman. And Leah does not count as a woman. I love my cousin, but she is just as bad with babies as you are."

I gasp in mock indignation and shove another muffin in my mouth, "I am not bad with babies! Eli loves me. Just because I nearly dropped Claire _once_, you have no faith in me. Guess I won't be babysitting any time soon. Since there are no 'women' that you would approve of to help supervise. Your loss."

Emily looks over at me and I know I'm in trouble with that last statement. She and Rachel seem to share a brain when it comes to setting me up. Any time I mention my lack of a woman, they start matchmaking, "What about Lillah?"

"Who's Lillah? Not another one of your Makah friends, right?" I swallow the muffin and reach for some bacon.

Emily turns off the stove and comes to sit in front of me. If looks could kill, I'm pretty sure I'd be a pile of ashes right now, "What do you mean 'Who's Lillah?'"

"Is that name supposed to mean something to me? I'm really sorry, Em, I don't recognize the name. Who is she?" I honestly have no idea what she is so upset about, it's rare for Emily to ever lose her cool.

Emily slaps my knee and I'm pretty sure she would punch me if she didn't know it would cause her more pain than me. She says in-between slaps, "Lillah. Is. The. Woman. You. Rescued. Today."

I don't say anything. I'm too stunned. Lillah. Yeah, that would be an appropriate name for her. Nothing simple, no, she would have to have a fancy name. I feel the rage that I had been able to work out of my system with the cliff diving return. I try to remain calm as I see Emily hasn't taken her eyes off of me.

"So the trouble maker has a name? Lie-lah?" I intentionally adjust her name, because I know, deep down inside, she has to be lying. She won't keep our secret, she's a liability.

Emily frowns and then leans forward, looking into my eyes, "She is not a trouble maker. She seemed to be nothing but nice. Unlike you. What do you have against her, anyway? And what were you doing down at the beach earlier? Don't play dumb with me, Embry Call, I've seen you boys phase enough, I recognize all of you."

I stand up quickly, unable to handle Emily's curious gaze. I run my hands through my now dry hair and pace the length of the kitchen, "I don't trust her. She's an outsider, she shouldn't know about us. I was just there...keeping tabs on her. I should probably go, thanks for the food, Emily".

I head for the back door, but before I can go, Emily grabs my hand and I turn back to her, "If she is the one you imprinted on, Embry, then she isn't an outsider. She is one of us. I recognize that anger, Sam acted the same way. He hated that he imprinted on me, because he was finally working things out with Leah. No matter how much you plan, life changes, Embry. You can either fight it and let the anger rule you, or accept it and see where it takes you. You might be surprised."

I shake my head, trying to clear the thoughts that are running through my head, "I didn't...she's not...I don't want..."

She lets go of my hand, turning back to check on Eli, not looking at me as she speaks directly to the baby, "Your Uncle Embry is in denial, Eli. But don't worry, he'll come around soon enough, they always do. Maybe soon your Aunt Lillah can help him babysit you."

I hear Eli coo at these words from Emily. I turn back to the door, knowing I can't lie to Emily if I'm looking her in the eye, "I'm not in denial Emily. I...I didn't imprint on her."

I hear her sigh as I open the door, "Fine, Embry. You can lie to me, but you can't lie to yourself. Remember, I recognize the signs as an imprintee as well. I saw how she looked at you. She recognized you, even in wolf form. She may not know exactly what is going on, but she isn't stupid. She feels drawn to you. Neither of you can deny that."

I shrug my shoulders, not saying anything more as I head out the back. I would phase and go for another run to clear my head, but I know Sam is out there. If Emily is suspicious, that means Sam is too. I can't chance him seeing the thoughts that are racing through my mind right now.

I slowly walk back around front to my truck. As I start the truck up, I see Claire peek out the front window, smile and wave at me. I wave back, but I start to daydream as I drive the familiar path between Sam and Emily's house and my place.

I see a little girl in my daydream, younger than Claire, three or four. This little girl is fair skinned with dark auburn hair. She's waving at me as I leave in the morning. Her strawberry blonde mother, _my wife_, is standing behind her, smiling as she waves with one hand and rubs her swollen belly with the other.

I pull up to my quiet apartment and just sit in my truck, sighing as the daydream fades and reality sets in. As nice as that daydream was, it's never going to happen. I have to accept that particular dream can never be, because if I don't accept it, if I let her have control, she will destroy my life.

-0-

**A/N**: Oh Embry, it's a good thing we love your stubborn ass. Emily and Rachel are two pushy imprintees. Can't wait to see what kind of trouble they stir up. Because you know they will!

This will come up more later, but (in our story at least) Embry lost his mom to breast cancer. For more information on breast cancer, and what you can do to help, check out Susan G. Komen for the Cure at (www [dot] komen [dot] org) and don't forget your monthly self-breast exams!


	3. Chapter 3 Better Off

**Chapter 3 "Better Off"**

**Disclaimer:** We only own a few things. A pack of Trident Layers gum, an iPhone, Lillah, Carter and Eli. We definitely do not own Twilight or SM's characters. We just like to *wiggles eyebrows* play with them.

**A/N:** We know that the first two chapters were full of repetition but it was necessary to get Embry's POV. Don't worry, once Lillah and Embry start interacting more, we'll get bits and pieces from each side but rarely will we repeat things. That is, assuming they ever get their stuff together! nibbles finger nails I'm more nervous about this chapter than I was with the very first. 

_And maybe someday_

_We'll figure all this out_

_Try to put an end to all our doubt_

_Try to find a way to make things better now and_

_Maybe someday we'll live our lives out loud_

_We'll be better off somehow_

_Someday_

**LPOV**

After the day and night I've just had, I don't have any intentions of getting out of bed until around noon, if ever. Since it's pouring rain outside, I decided to take a day off from my morning run. I took a shower earlier, right before I climbed back into my warm bed. This has been the extent of my movement this morning. _Thank God for lazy Sunday mornings._

I had a series of dreams all night long. Some I can't remember; where others are still vivid in my mind. Of course all of them were about 'Cranky Pants'. I feel the blush creep up my neck and over my cheeks when I begin to see flashes of the dream that lasted longest.

In the dream, I was in the shower. I heard footsteps and a male voice calling out my name. My dream self wasn't frightened in the least, she knew who it was. The shower curtain slowly eased back and I smiled at the handsome face that appeared around the edge. He was smiling too; he was also naked and _fully_ aroused.

I flop over on my bed trying to clear my head, avoiding the fact that I dreamed about his naked body, his arousal and what it would feel like to have him join me in the shower. I can still feel his hands all over my skin, the water coursing between our bodies.

I rub my hands across my face, trying to get rid of the images that are floating behind my eyelids but it doesn't help. He's stuck in my brain and there is no way to get him out.

He stepped in the shower and he kissed me like I've never been kissed in my entire life, full of passion, love, and need. I want to _live_ that moment over and over again. I'd like nothing more than to have it be real, just once.

After he pulled away from my lips he growled out my name, telling me that he wanted to fuck me against the shower wall. The next thing I knew, he was lifting me up, wrapping my legs around his waist and sliding into me, inch by precious inch.

I sigh deeply when I realize that rehashing my dream is not going to help me at all. I am just getting turned on all over again, an ache spreading through my body. In all my life, even as a teenager, I never had sex dreams. _Dear God I hope that this is not a reoccurring theme_. I'm pretty sure that this guy is going to drive me out of my mind.

I'm surprised when my phone rings because it's still pretty early; cringing at first, afraid to look at the caller ID. Recently I've been getting texts that I'd rather not receive.

I'm relieved that it's Rachel calling to ask if I'd like to join her, Kim and Emily for breakfast at Forks Coffee Shop. I tell her that I'd love to join and jump up to get dressed. _Thank goodness for the distraction_.

I pull on a pair of jeans, an old band t-shirt, and my chucks. I'm trying to be as comfortable as possible, plus I don't want to seem like I'm trying too hard to make Emily and Kim like me. _Which I am, but that's beside the point._ Other than Rachel I haven't had a close female friend and I would be lucky to have this group of ladies in my life.

In the past, my lack of female companionship was because I was so tied down with Carter - he only wanted me to be friends with the 'right' girls. After that fell apart, I was so focused on school work that I didn't notice my lack of friendships. At the time, I didn't really put much thought into it. To be honest, I didn't care but now it is something that I wish I had more of.

Needless to say, even now that I've moved to Forks, I don't get out much, preferring a quiet evening with a book on my back porch to a 'night out'. My biggest fear now is the women here in Forks and La Push will see me as something that I'm not - a spoiled rich girl with high priced clothing and everything handed to her. It's true that I grew up privileged but I have never used that to my advantage or against others.

After finishing up my few simple morning tasks I grab my car keys, cell phone and camera, throwing them in my cute little canvas bag and lock up.

-0-

On my way to the diner, I make a quick call to my mom to see how she and dad are. We chat for a few minutes and then she chastises me for talking on the phone while driving. I laugh and tell her to give my love to dad and hang up.

I pull up in front of the diner, placing the hood of my jacket over my head before jumping out of my Acura and make a run for it. _I should have thought twice about leaving my hair down_, I think, as I fight with the wind that has started blowing. As soon as I step through the door I hear Rachel call my name over the loud chatter that fills the small restaurant.

I love this place - the atmosphere, the cooks and waitresses; they all treat me like I'm a local and not someone new. Rachel and I come here a lot for lunch and I'm comfortable enough that I hang my dripping jacket on the coat rack by the door. I wave at one of the waitresses that calls me by name as I walk back to the corner table that we grab whenever possible.

Rachel is sitting with Emily next to her and they both smile at me when I stop next to the table. Emily introduces me to Kim, who I learn is Jared's wife.

I glance next to Emily and see a baby carrier. My eyes grow wide and I smile brightly as Emily 'introduces' me to her cutie pie baby boy, Eli. I had no idea she and Sam had a baby.

Kim stands so I can sit on the other side of Eli. He is probably the cutest baby I've ever seen; golden brown skin, chocolate eyes, and round cheeks.

There is a sudden ache that begins deep down and spreads up into my heart when he smiles at me. His tiny fist clutches my index finger with a strong grip. It's been so long since I've even entertained the idea of wanting kids that I'm taken aback by my reaction. While I'd been with Carter I'd let that idea go, not wanting to push him into something that _he_ didn't want. I smile at Eli when I realize that if I want a baby, I don't have to ask permission.

"He likes you," Emily says, she is smiling at me as I look up at her.

"You are in trouble, Emily. He's going to be a real heartbreaker," I grin, as I look down at him. He looks me straight in the eyes, smirks and then coos; making us all laugh. Emily tells me that he's six months old and he's already ahead of the 'curve' for his age. I don't find this too surprising, considering what I've witnessed and learned so far.

Once we settle down I turn to Kim, realizing that with the baby talk, I didn't get a chance to really talk to her.

"It's great to meet you, Kim. I think that maybe Emily mentioned you yesterday... when she and Rachel were talking to me on the beach?" I glance at Emily for confirmation and she nods her head and smiles. Kim grins at me shyly and I see a slight blush cover her cheeks.

She looks only a few years younger than Rachel and Emily. She has a rounded face, high cheekbones and long black hair. She has a way about her that immediately puts me at ease.

"I ordered for you, I hope that's ok, Lillah. A veggie omelet and wheat toast," Rachel speaks suddenly and I notice that there is a cup of coffee and a glass of orange juice in front of me. Just one more reason why I love this place, they know what you want before you can even think to ask for it.

"I am a creature of habit," I laugh and Rachel smirks because she rarely orders the same thing, unlike me - _I_ rarely order something different.

Rachel doesn't waste any time. She begins talking about what happened yesterday. I figure that now is as good a time as any and I admit that I do have a 'few' questions. Most everything on my mental list from last night orbits around Cranky Pants and that annoys me beyond belief.

"The guy that carried me to the beach, who is he?" I ask right off. Our food is brought over to the table and passed around before anyone has the chance to answer.

"That's Embry Call," Rachel informs me around a bite of her cherry smothered pancakes.

Baby Eli giggles out loud at the mention of the name. Rachel rolls her eyes and grumbles about men sticking together, no matter their age.

"Funny, I thought his name was 'Cranky Pants'," I mutter, looking down at my omelet.

I glance back up at Rachel, Emily, and Kim and gasp, putting my hand over my mouth. I can feel my embarrassment flushing my cheeks bright pink. _I can't believe I just said that in front of his friends._ It's probably not the best way to form bonds and friendships, degrading one of their... wolves.

Emily, Rachel and Kim glance at one another, looks of surprise on all of their faces. Then suddenly, they all three burst out laughing. I can feel my blush darken, setting my face on fire as I apologize over and over.

"Oh honey, no. That was probably the best nickname I've ever heard for one of them. Don't apologize, we aren't offended. At all," Emily squeaks out between fits of giggles.

I rest my elbows on the table top and place my forehead in my hands. I am pretty sure that somewhere down the line, this will be brought up again, hopefully not in the presence of... Embry. I can't bear to have him hate me even more than he already does. _Which doesn't make sense. Why should I care what he thinks of me?__  
_  
I feel a hand on my back and glance up. It's Kim, who is now biting her bottom lip in an attempt to hold in the laughter. Perfect.

"It's really ok," she smiles at me genuinely, "We've all said much worse about them. We are the last to judge anyone when the guys are being jerks."

I smile weakly at the other two women that I quickly find myself liking. They are easy to talk to, funny, nice - all things I'd be lucky to have in friends. I silently tell myself not to get ahead and to just enjoy my time with Rachel's girlfriends. I tune back into the conversation going on around me and start spouting questions once everyone calms down again.

"So this 'imprinting' thing, how does it happen? How many of you are there?" I start off slowly, simply, giving them time to ease into what I'm really wanting to know.

The girls take turns explaining things to me, sometimes in vast detail, other times not. We talk for so long that I lose track of time. When I check my watch I see we've been here over two hours. Knowing these three women may not have all day to talk to me, I become impatient to start asking about 'CP'. I don't want them to realize what it is that I'm after so I've been biding my time, but I'm not sure how much longer I have.

There is a long pause after a few minutes of steady conversation and Emily looks at me expectantly. A glance at the three faces of the girls tells me that I am not fooling anyone with my casual behavior. _Here goes nothing_.

"Have all of the wol...guys; do you call them wolves or just guys?" I lean in and whisper, not really sure what the protocol is, "Are they all imprinted?" I ask and lean back against the booth seat.

"We call them both, actually. Obviously in public, we refrain from the 'w' word," Kim smiles softly at me.

I nod my head in understanding, wondering how hard it must be for them to keep such a huge secret like this.

Emily clears her throat, catching my attention as she prepares to answer my question, "No, they aren't all imprinted. The last lonely wolves are Seth and Leah Clearwater, they are brother and sister" she explains, hesitating before adding, "and Embry."

I take that information and let it soak in slowly, storing it away for the future, "Is there a reason why they aren't imprinted yet?" I'm especially curious that it's just a few of them.

"Well, we don't know really. There isn't really a rule about how old they are when they imprint. No one ever thought a girl could be a wolf. It was believed to be a male trait only," Rachel conveniently leaves out Embry, knowing that is who I am most curious about.

"And Embry is just a wolf whore," Kim mutters quietly but I still manage to catch it.

My body stiffens and I hear Emily and Rachel snicker lightly.

"Kim, he's not so bad. Embry just hasn't found the right one yet," Emily comes to his defense.

"Oh please, Emily, he sleeps with anything on two legs!" Rachel rolls her eyes and picks up her recently refilled cup of coffee.

These are not things I wanted to or expected to hear. My emotions go on a roller coaster ride, much the same way that seeing Eli for the first time made them do. I don't like it, I don't like the pull I feel towards Embry and I don't like that he is possibly dating other women. I have no idea why it would bother me and it baffles me even more that I reacted to him so strongly yesterday.

I tell the ladies I need to make a quick run to the restroom because of the copious amounts of coffee I've consumed all morning. In actuality, I need a little break, a chance to gather myself so that I don't reveal anything to these three. I have a feeling if I were to say something that might make them suspicious, they'd never let up until they found out the truth. _That I'm attracted to someone I can't have, I can't be with.__  
_  
Emily, Rachel and Kim laugh when I climb from under our table. I didn't want Kim to move from her seat and I knew the jostling and movement might wake Eli. I grin at them when I stand and brush off my hands before heading toward the opposite corner of the diner.

After I finish my 'business' I stand in front of the sink, washing my hands and looking at myself closely. I am so different from the three ladies I'm sitting with. Wavy strawberry blonde hair, grey eyes, pale skin and a sprinkle of freckles across the bridge of my nose. I glance down at my body, frowning at what I see.

I'm jealous of how beautiful and lithe their bodies are compared to mine. I am short, petite, if you will, and curvy. They are all unbelievably beautiful. Their skin tone, their deep, expressive eyes and their glistening, straight black hair. Imprinting aside, I can see why those guys don't like to let them out of their sight.

I lean closer to the mirror as I dry my hands. I am out of my league. Embry would never date someone like me. I frown at that thought and ask myself, "Where did that come from? Don't even go there, Lillah. It's not happening." I pull my tube of lip balm from my pocket and glide it across my lips. "No more stalling," I tell myself and turn to pull the bathroom door open.

-0-

As I walk out I'm not paying attention to our table because I'm looking around the diner for our waitress. I've just decided I want to order dessert for us to share, even though it's still just mid morning. I approach the table and stop abruptly when I notice someone new is sitting in our booth, talking to Eli animatedly. This someone is a male and I know who it is before I ever hear his voice or see his face.

"What are you doing with all of these ladies, dude? You should be hanging out with us guys. We'll go to the shop, do manly things. Have a few beers, root beer for you, and watch some classic football games," he tells Eli seriously.

I can't help myself and I chuckle quietly and smile at how cute it is. He is drawing me in.

Rachel, Emily and Kim all three look up at me at the same time. Embry is mid sentence when his attention is pulled away from Eli. Embry's mouth is left open when he sees me, his face immediately dropping from a bright playful smile to a deep dark frown. _Well, guess we know where I stand with him_. His mouth snaps shut and he turns away from me abruptly, speaking hurriedly to Emily about something I can't make out. _Great_.

I'm not sure how it is this is only the second time I've been around him and I still feel like I'm interfering in his life in some way. I stand back for a second and watch the three girls, who all have confused looks on their faces.

Embry and I are officially introduced and I mutter a polite hello. When our waitress approaches to ask if I'd like more coffee, I decline, making an excuse about needing to go.

My right hand drops loosely to my side as I reach around Embry to touch baby Eli. As I turn away I catch a strong, distinctly masculine scent and it makes me pause. It's not cologne or aftershave or anything unnatural. It is all him. And it is the best thing I think I've ever smelled in all of my life.

I face him, confused that a man's scent, _his_ scent could catch my attention so easily. I feel something hot touch the back of my hand. I look down to see Embry's fingers brush mine.

Without realizing what I'm doing I twist my wrist slightly to thread my fingers with his; the palm of my hand against the back of his. Instead of allowing me to do that he takes my hand in his, wrapping my wrist with his long fingers.

My breath is stuck in my throat and I look up at him. His face is mere inches from mine and then he looks down at our hands. His fingers are playing with the little 'friendship bracelet' I retrieved out of the cereal box yesterday, twisting it around his fingertips. He smirks, one corner of his mouth lifting just slightly and I wonder what is so funny.

It all happens so quickly that I half convince myself I'm imagining things; he's not touching me, leaning into me. The heat of his body surrounds me and we stare at each other for several long seconds before there is a high pitched squeal in front of us. _Eli_.

Embry's face goes dark and he blinks, his eyelids reminding me of shutters, closing me out. He drops my hand quickly, as if I've burned him even though it's _his_ skin that is scorching hot. I berate myself because I have somehow made him angry _again_. Embry turns his back to me, as I shake myself out of my stupor before speaking.

"Rachel," I dread speaking, "I'm going to head out. I have a few errands I need to run before it gets too late," I tell her, hoping they all believes the lie.

She knows my obsessive nature and that I never wait until Sunday to get things done. "I'll call you later tonight or see you at school tomorrow."

I look around the table at Emily and Kim and thank the girls for allowing me to have breakfast with them. Lastly, I turn and run a finger along Eli's cheek and smile at him softly. I'm dying to touch Embry's cheek as well, but instead I shove my hands in my jean pockets and turn to leave.

Walking away from Embry is probably the hardest thing I've done in a long time. I don't know what it is about him that makes me want to stay. He's like a magnet and I can't control my own body for the force of his pull.

I run out of the diner, forgetting my jacket but not wanting to go back in to grab it once I realize my mistake. I need to get away, far away and fast. I start making a plan in my head, hoping that maybe when I get home, Angela will be there. I want to spend some time with her, watch movies and have dinner later. Mostly I'm just hoping I can keep my mind off of the man that I'm leaving behind.

On my drive home I decide to stop by the grocery and pick up some snacks - ice cream, chips and cookies. All things a girl needs when she's mooning over a boy. _I'm so pathetic_. I roll my eyes at myself as I hurriedly throw my purchases in the passenger seat and close my door.

Right about now, I'm really wishing I'd gone back for my jacket.

-0-

Angela has just gotten home as I finish changing into dry clothes; I pounce on her, greedy for the company. We immediately prepare some snacks for ourselves and pop in the first movie of our marathon, _The Breakfast Club_. Any time either of us has ever had a bad day, be it with a boy or work, we have the same routine. I glance over at her and smile sadly, thinking about how I've missed her lately. She looks at me questioningly but I shake my head and assure her that it's nothing.

When the movie ends we take a break so Angela can grab another diet soda and a bag of Red Vines. I make a break for the bathroom grabbing a blanket off of the foot of my bed as I walk back through my bedroom towards the living room. After we are back on the sofa she looks at me seriously.

"What's up with you, Lah?" she asks, using the name she gave me when we were kids, when she couldn't pronounce my whole name.

"I'd say you broke up with someone or were having boy troubles if I didn't know you aren't dating," Angela's brow wrinkles, deep in thought as she studies me closely.

"No, it's not a guy," I lie, "maybe it's the rain." I shrug my shoulders, trying to be casual.

"It could be the 'back to school blues'," I suggest, knowing she'll see through thelies right away. She knows that I love both the rain and school.

"You know you can share anything with me, Lillah."

"I know that I can, Angie. I'm fine, honestly, I just needed a girls day is all," I meet her steady gaze, hoping that I've managed to smooth away the sadness on my face long enough for her to believe me.

After she seems like she's convinced we settle back down and start a new movie. I cuddle up on one end of the couch while she's on the other.

The last thing I remember is the face of Molly Ringwold in _Sixteen Candles _while she chatters on the phone to her best friend. I must have fallen asleep on the couch because the next thing I know, I am dreaming of 'him'.

-0-

There are flashes behind my eyelids as I see him running toward me with purpose, much like he did the first time I saw him. Only this time, it's with a different mission. He's coming to sweep me up in his arms for another reason. We've spent the morning making love and I'm preparing breakfast in the kitchen, in _our_ kitchen. I tease him that we need to regain some strength and energy in order to try a few more of the things he's been whispering in my ear.

This man, I've come to realize, is _completely_ insatiable. Of course I don't mind so much, but sometimes it still shocks me.

He turns off the gas stove and growls out that he isn't hungry for the eggs I'm scrambling. _Well, okay then_. I stumble back against him, sighing happily when I feel him hard against me. He kisses along the bend of my neck and I moan his name. It's highly possible I'm never going to get enough of him.

He lifts me up and carries me to our bedroom, dropping me on the bed, making me laugh when I bounce on the bed. He pushes himself away after kissing me gently and then he's gone. I hear a door slam shut and it dawns on me, I'm waking up. _No. I need more._ My eyes squeeze shut and then I open them back up quickly when I feel the bed shift beneath me.

Suddenly he's close to me again and I relax, thankful my dream hasn't come to an end. He is amazing. I can see every laugh line on his handsome face. He has beautiful well-toned skin. It looks soft to the touch and my fingertips itch to touch it. Lifting my hand I reach out to him. His hand meets mine, bringing it to his face, to his lips. He kisses my palm gently and I cup my hand around his cheek, running my fingers along his smooth face.

A hesitant smile spreads across my mouth and I pull him closer because I can't stop myself. I'm drowning in his eyes and I want to feel his soft pillow lips against mine. _Fuck it_, I think to myself, _I'm dreaming anyway_. I prop myself up on my other arm and lean closer, hovering my mouth over his, waiting for him to make the next move.

This dream doesn't vary much from the ones that I suffered through last night. I find myself wishing he was going through the same torture.

Dream Embry's eyes slip shut slowly and he leans toward me. I can feel his breath on my face, smell his sweet and spicy scent. I already know his kisses will taste the same way before he makes contact. _Ah, bliss_.

He presses his lips to mine and there is a part of my brain that screams out what my mouth can't, "Finally! Oh God, FI-NAL-LY." He runs his tongue along my bottom lip, asking me to open my mouth to him. I would pretty much open anything to him, any day and any time as long as he just keeps doing what he's doing.

Now I have him right where I want him. Or almost. Just a little further and he'll be on top of me, making me feel things only he can.

I am fairly certain I never want to wake up. I'd like to just continue to dream about him for the rest of my life. Surely dreams are better than any reality I could ever have.

He presses his chest against mine as he leans into me. The tank top I'm wearing is paper thin and I can immediately feel his hot skin against me. His hands are in my hair, clutching it. My own hands reach up to grip his hair and tug gently. I'm silently asking him to lift himself up and move his body so it is cradled between my thighs. All I can think about is having all of him against me, feeling him hard and hot in my hands as I explore his skin. Only he doesn't allow that, he is in control and he doesn't move from his kneeling position on the floor.

My nipples strain against my shirt, the ribbed material rubbing against them. There isn't enough air in the room but I don't want him to pull away from me, to end this. I'm afraid I'll wake up any second and I don't want to lose this. But he does pull away slightly, smirking when I whimper in protest and he tells me that he's not leaving me. _Not yet at least_.

Embry looks at me closely, studying my face but I'm not having any of that. I reach up and pull him back down to me, needing to feel his touch again. He shakes his head at me, pulling my arms down gently; placing them at my sides as he slowly slips his hands under my shirt. My stomach muscles clench involuntarily. This is too much. _I shouldn't allow him to touch me. He is too perfect and will be disgusted._

Much to my surprise he keeps going, his hands drifting higher under my shirt. I watch his face, looking for any signs that he might find me as unattractive as Carter always did when it came to this.

But he doesn't stop and he surprises me even more by placing a kiss on my stomach, on top of the fabric of my shirt. His hands slip beneath my shirt until he's cupping my breasts gently.

He looks pleased, aroused even, and I am both flabbergasted and turned on. He tells me that I am perfect and that I was made for him. I have to bite my tongue to keep from telling him he should get his eyes checked if he thinks I'm anywhere close to perfect.

Why am I fighting this? This is _my_ dream, after all. I should allow him to tell me what I desperately want to hear him say. I won't get that when I'm awake.

His hands feel so amazing on my body. I can feel the differences between our skin. Mine is smooth and soft and his hands are rough and calloused from working. Even though he has massive palms and long fingers, I can feel my breasts overflow his warm hands. I look up at him, unable to take my eyes off of his face. Just seeing his reactions to touching me has me burning for him.

My breasts grow heavy beneath his hands and I push my chest up slightly to meet him. Embry gently takes my nipples between his thumb and index finger and sends sparks of electricity down through my stomach. He tugs gently, twisting my puckered nipple between his fingers and it sends waves of heat to the juncture of my legs. I think I could die right here and be happy.

Without realizing it, I'm suddenly speaking out loud, praying I don't wake up. I have never regretted words so much in my life. He is suddenly pulling his hands from beneath my shirt, pushing away from me and moving across the room. It's as if he can't get away from me fast enough. His response is harsh and painful, cutting me swiftly.

I blink several times and sit up, gasping when I realize that I have _not_ been dreaming this entire time. No, I am wide awake. At least for parts of what I thought were just fantasies. I can't even believe this is happening after only meeting him yesterday. It feels impossibly right and I don't have any idea why.

He paces back and forth across the living room and I wrap my arms around myself, trying to guard what I'd been holding close to my heart since he'd carried me onto the beach. I'm even more sure now that I might have feelings for this man, this _stranger_. I take several deep breaths and run my hands up into my hair, tugging it gently as I try to calm myself.

Embry turns around to face me finally; his face is now blank and doesn't show any of the emotions it did before. It makes my heart pound and I'm scared.

Not that I'm afraid of him, but because I know he's probably going to tell me he can't stomach the idea of touching me again.

Instead of yelling, as I expected, he tells me very calmly that he is sorry and that he hadn't meant to touch me without my consent. Although, I'm pretty sure I was more than consenting, I don't disagree with his words. The last thing I want is to start an argument with him.

He gestures to my jacket and tells me that he had brought it and my cell phone to me, as a favor to Rachel. I guess I now know where I stand with him. If she hadn't asked, he certainly wouldn't be here now. He didn't want me in any way, shape or form. If I hadn't practically attacked him, he wouldn't have kissed me. I swallow thickly, clearing my throat before I thank him for bringing it over. I also thank him once more for being my savior yesterday. Except now, after thinking about it all night, I'm not really sure I had anything to fear from Paul. But I am definitely not safe with Embry here now.

I'm instructed by him to call Rachel because she's probably worried about me and that Angela is out for the night. Then another apology comes. I feel my chest caving in more, trying to shelter my heart when he says that this, him kissing me, won't happen again.

I finally admit to him that I don't understand why he's so angry at me and I make another promise that I won't tell anyone their secret. I'm hoping this will ease the tension between us. I say this with as much earnest as I can because it's the truth and I want him, I _need_ him, to believe me.

In response, he tells me that I'm an outsider and that I shouldn't have been there. That I shouldn't know their secret. This makes my heart ache and I find myself blinking steadily, trying to push back the tears that have suddenly sprung into my eyes. He wishes I'd never been there, he wishes he'd never met me.

He moves toward my coffee table, pulling something from his pocket and throwing it next to my jacket. It's the same friendship bracelet that I pulled out of my cereal box yesterday. We both like the same cereal. _Big deal, we share a common taste with millions of other people._

I want to say these words to him but I can't really make my voice work. I'm afraid if I speak, I'll burst into tears. Then I become angry with myself because I should not be letting this man control me so much. I stopped allowing someone of the opposite sex to use me as a doormat when I moved away from Seattle. Not only that, but I don't really think I should be getting this upset about a simple kiss and rejection. I barely know him. Actually, I don't know him at all.

I'm left with an ominous warning that he'll be watching me, making sure that I keep my promise and then he turns and walks away. I hear him slam my back door as he leaves the house. I sit, staring down at the cereal box toy he's left behind. The silence in the house is deafening and I find myself wanting him to come back. _This is a huge complication._ I tell myself that I have to stay away from him to remain unscathed.

The time I spend on the couch staring down at the table drags on and I don't honestly know how long it lasts. Finally, I force myself to stand, picking up the jacket from the coffee table. I mean to put it in the coat closet in the hallway, but as I go to hang it up, I realize it smells like him. I hesitate but I know I should just hang up the jacket and close the closet door. I grab an empty hanger angrily and thrust the jacket into the closet. After I slam the door I turn and walk into my bedroom, sending Rachel a quick text, telling her that I'm going to relax for the rest of the night and I'll see her in the morning. After that is taken care of I head into my bathroom, shedding clothes as I go.

My plan is a searing hot shower that will hopefully wipe away the feeling of his hands on my stomach and breasts. Too bad I can't do the same for my mind and heart.

-0-

Lillah & Embry's friendship bracelet: farm3[dot]static[dot]flickr[dot]com/2554/4145316821_d9841921ce[dot]jpg

**A/N:** Hope you enjoyed! Please let us know what you think! 


	4. Chapter 4 I Only Wanted

**Chapter 4 "I Only Wanted"**

**Disclaimer:** We only own a few things. A couple of crazy dogs, a TV that doesn't recognize the remote signal (have to actually get up like it's 1985) & Lillah, Carter and Eli. We definitely do not own Twilight or SM's characters (if we did, we'd have a rockin' new TV, know that!). We just like to "play" with them.

**A/N:** Thanks as always to our AMAZING beta Daily_i_Candy! She puts up with a LOT from us! This chapter does have some overlap with chapter 3, but trust us, you want to see E's POV! Assuming they ever get their stuff together, once Lillah and Embry start interacting more, we'll get bits and pieces from each side but rarely will we repeat things.

_I only wanted, only wanted just to touch you_

_I couldn't bear it, couldn't bear it if you leave_

_It doesn't matter, doesn't matter if I scare you_

_I only wanted, only wanted someone else's skin_

_To feel you there_

"Blotter" - Stone Sour

**EPOV**

"Embry? Embry where are you? I need you, Embry."

The sound of her voice, saying she needs me, causes me to sit up straight in my bed. I've just fallen asleep, crashing in my bed after my patrols. I rub my eyes, trying to clear my mind, "Lillah? I'm in the bedroom. How...how did you find me?"

And then, there she is, walking into my room. Her hair is loose, falling in waves over her shoulders. She's wearing a pink nightie, the same color her cheeks turned yesterday when we would make eye contact; the same color they are turning now.

She has a silk robe over her nightie, with the belt barely tied. They fall well above her knees, showing off enough of her creamy thighs that I'm already panting thinking about those thighs encircling my hips.

She walks closer to me, playing with the belt, not quite making eye contact with me, "Just like you found me on the beach yesterday, I followed your scent."

I slide to the edge of the bed and she stops just in front of me. I have to touch her, feel her. I reach out, pulling her by the belt of her robe until the bottom edge of her nightie is teasing the tip of my straining cock. Leaning forward, I run my nose along the column of her neck, inhaling the scent that is uniquely hers. But there is something even more appealing to me; her raw _need_ for me. I see her nipples pucker under the silk of the nightie. I untie her robe, and slide it off her shoulders, letting it fall to the floor. She is standing before me in just the pale silky nightie and I'm overwhelmed.

My need for her is all consuming; it's so powerful that I know I can't be the gentle lover I want to be for her right now. For the first time in my life, I don't want to just have sex with a woman. I want to make love to her, only her. I can't, it's too much; one touch and I know I will be lost in her.

Before I can tell her what I'm thinking, she leans forward, capturing my face between her hands and brushing her lips softly back and forth against mine, "It's okay Embry. Let me help you. I want to help you now so it can be slow and amazing for both of us."

I shake my head, unsure what she is saying, until she starts kissing down my chest. I try to protest, "Lills, no, you don't have to..."

She continues down my stomach, until she kisses the tip of my cock. She wraps both her hands around it and looks up at me, her smile bright, her grey eyes twinkling, "I know I don't _have_ to Embry. Believe me, I _want_ to."

She runs her tongue around the tip, and then her hands tighten their grip as she lowers her mouth down on me. I nearly cum at the sight; as it is, my hands bury themselves in her hair. I mean to pull her off, not wanting her to feel she _has_ to do this, but I hear and feel her moan in pleasure as my tip hits the back of her throat.

My grip on her hair tightens as I start moving her head in a slow rhythm that allows her to adjust to my size. But she doesn't want slow. She starts moving faster, her teeth lightly grazing the underside of my cock as she moves up, her tongue swirling around the tip just before she takes me deeper in her mouth.

"Lills! I can't hold on - fuck, baby, I'm going to..."

_BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP _

I reach for the alarm clock on my bedside table, ripping the plug out of the wall and throwing the alarm across the room. I hear it splinter into a few pieces as it hits the wall, but I don't care.

_What the fuck was that?_ I've had wet dreams before but nothing like that. It was so damn real; I could feel her skin, her mouth around me.

I look down and see that the raging hard on wasn't a dream. I haven't woken up with wood this bad since I was sixteen. I consider a cold shower but know that isn't going to give me the relief I need. Since my alarm clock is now destroyed, _thanks to her_, I check the clock on my cell phone, ten a.m. Shuffling my feet, I slowly heading towards the bathroom, resigned to the fact that I'm going to have to take care of this issue on my own.

I turn the shower to hot before stepping in, the warm water relaxing my tense muscles. Reaching down I begin stroking, letting my thoughts slip back to the dream. The steam surrounds me as images from the dream flash through my mind. _Her blush. The silkiness of her nightie. The nipples of her full breasts puckering just from my gaze. Her scent. Her desire. Her hot mouth around me._ I'm losing control quickly, the intensity of the dream still fresh. I smack the palm of my free hand to the wall, screaming out as I cum, "LILLAH!"

Resting my head against the cool tile for a few moments, I try to catch my breath while collecting my thoughts. _What the hell am I going to do? She's invading my dreams. I just had one of the best orgasms I've had in years at just the thought of her mouth on me. What the fuck am I going to do if she actually does touch me?_

I shake my head and quickly wash up. Stepping into the bedroom, I get dressed in my usual jeans and t-shirt. Walking into the kitchen, I grab the last box of Lucky Charms from the cabinet. I pour the contents into a bowl, only to find there are just a few pieces left, along with the prize.

Pulling the prize out of the bowl, I snicker when I see it's a 'friendship' bracelet. Instead of setting it aside as I normally would, I shove it in my pocket, thinking it might be something cute to give to Lillah, to make her smile.

I know I shouldn't be thinking about making her smile, I should be concerned with figuring out if there is any way to ignore an imprint. I want to ignore her; I'm angry with her for coming into my life. I had everything I wanted; I didn't need her to make me happy.

But I _can't_ ignore her. She's all I've thought about from the moment I first saw her. In my mind I see her on the beach with Rachel and Emily yesterday. Before she recognized me, she looked so happy, comfortable even, being around them. I want her to feel that way around me, relaxed, comfortable, and happy.

Thankfully, before I can investigate that thought process any further, my stomach alerts me to its current empty status. I pull on my boots, grabbing my keys and cell phone, then head out to the truck. I make the short drive to the Forks Coffee Shop, smiling when I see Emily's car in the parking lot.

When I run in to the diner, my t-shirt gets soaked by the rain. Unfortunately, that is life on the Olympic Peninsula; beautiful days are few and far between here. I shake my hair out as I walk in, waving at Emily, Rachel, and Kim sitting at a booth near the back. They motion for me to come over and I realize that Emily has Eli with her.

I stop by the counter to put in my order then head over to their table. The ladies all have their heads down as I approach, but look up simultaneously when I reach the table. They all look around, like they are expecting someone, "Am I interrupting anything? Are you waiting for someone to join you?"

Emily smiles slowly before looking at both Rachel and Kim, who have their heads down again, "No, you're not interrupting, Embry. The only person we were waiting for is you."

She moves her hand in Kim's direction, indicating she should scoot across the seat, "Please, sit, and make yourself comfortable."

Kim moves over and Emily pushes Eli's car seat down towards me so I can talk to my favorite little man. Eli smiles wide as I talk to him. When I pause, he giggles loudly, but he's not looking at me. Then I hear a noise behind me. I look up to see Emily and Rachel looking directly over my shoulder.

I grin, thinking Sam must have been in the restroom and that is why Eli is giggling. But when I look over my shoulder I see Lillah, not Sam. My anger is quick - _How dare she invade my friends?_ As quickly as that thought passes another comes to my mind - _It's her fault I had to take care of myself like that this morning. I haven't had to do that in years. _

This woman is trying to ruin me, she's fucking changing my sex life, and I haven't even kissed her. Any other time I would have just gone to another town and found a willing woman to help me with that issue. But no, thanks to her, now I can't think of anyone else. I only want _her_ to touch me. _FUCK!_

I lean towards Emily, speaking low so Lillah can't hear me but the other women can, "You knew she was here and you didn't tell me? Don't you know she's... You should have told me she was here."

Trying to remain calm, I look away from three prying pairs of eyes. I hate that she has the power to make me so angry just by being here.

Rachel clears her throat. I look up from my careful examination of my fists on the tabletop, "Embry, meet my friend, Lillah Hunter. Lillah, your rescuer, Embry Call."

Emily giggles and mumbles, "More like Lillah, meet your wolf."

I glare at Emily before turning to nod in recognition, not quite making eye contact, "Hi."

She also nods, keeping her head down as she chokes out her own "Hello" while her cheeks turn bright pink.

I hear the waitress ask Lillah if she wants more coffee, but she declines. She steps forward to rub her thumb across Eli's plump cheek. He grins wide at her. _Traitor._

She starts to turn to leave but pauses when she faces me. She looks puzzled, like she's trying to figure out a difficult math equation. Without thinking, I reach out to her, my fingertips gently sliding across the smooth skin on the back of her hand.

Just that small touch sends a spark of electricity through me. I don't care that we are in a public place, I want to pull her onto my lap again, start up where we left off on the beach yesterday. I want to crush her lips to mine tasting the lip gloss that I can tell she just applied.

I want to throw her in my truck and take her home to recreate my dream from this morning. But that's not all I want. I need to feel her under me, pulling me deeper, calling my name as she clenches around me. _Jesus, I'm hard as a fucking rock again._

She looks startled, then glances down at our hands and seems almost relieved. She has intertwined our fingers together, but I quickly move my hand up to her wrist, lifting it towards my mouth, needing to taste her skin. I pause when I feel something familiar around her wrist. I look down and smirk when I see she's wearing a friendship bracelet just like the one in my pocket. I let my fingers focus on the friendship bracelet while I return my gaze to her eyes.

I notice that her eyes get darker when we are close, or touching. I wonder how dark they will be when she...

A high pitched squeal next to my ear startles me out of my train of thought. _Eli_.

I close my eyes, knowing that, without even thinking about it, I've been pulling her closer to me. Both of us are leaning into the other, completely unaware of our friends around the table.

I'm acting like a selfish ass, I know this, but I can't stop myself. I want to be with Lillah but I don't want the complications that she brings. I know I need to stop before she gets hurt. I don't want to hurt her. It's not her fault I never wanted to imprint.

Worst of all, I already care for her, and I know, without a doubt, she deserves so much more than me. I drop her hand and turn my back to her, giving her the chance to walk away like she planned.

-0-

I know the second the door of the diner closes behind Lillah. Not because that's the moment Emily, Rachel, and Kim start in on me, even though it is, but because that's when I realize I feel empty without her around. _This fucking sucks._

I don't have time to analyze my own feelings because Emily, Rachel, and Kim are looking at me expectantly. I look down from their intense stares to my hands, back on the table again. I lift my eyes when Eli starts to whimper. I push his car seat back over towards Emily as I finally ask, "Sorry, what was the question?"

Rachel looks over at Emily trying to calm Eli down then quietly repeats herself, "What the HELL was that all about? Why were you so angry to see her? You were flat out rude, and then you two had that weird...moment."

Emily gets Eli settled, turning to Rachel before I can even respond, "I can tell you what that moment was, not that Embry will admit it."

I do my best to clear my face. I want to look completely unfazed by what I know Emily is about to say. If I were to beg Emily not to say something, to even turn to glare at her in this moment, it would confirm her suspicions, which is the last thing I want to happen. I'm hopeful I can survive this conversation without saying anything, but I'll be happy as long as they don't find out the truth.

Rachel and Kim both look at me then back to Emily. They say near simultaneously, "WHAT?"

"He imprinted on her," Emily smiles knowingly, speaking to both of them but looking me straight in the eye.

I don't breathe or blink until Emily breaks our eye contact. Rachel is tugging on Emily's sleeve to get her attention. After our little stare off ends, I turn my head to look out the window, figuring the rain is safer to look at than the table. I hear the conversation between the three ladies as they list out all the reasons why they think I imprinted on Lillah. I don't add anything to the conversation, I just keep staring out the window, hearing everything but saying nothing.

Rachel is the first to react, "Oh my gosh, you think so, Em? That would be so amazing, I love Lillah!"

"What makes you think that?" Kim, the more cautious of the three women questions.

Emily takes a deep breath before explaining her thoughts, "Well, there's the obvious way they look at each other. And, you'll remember this Rachel, she saw him for the first time in wolf form yesterday at the beach and recognized him right away."

Rachel giggles, "Not only did she recognize him, she turned bright pink when she saw him. I've never seen her blush like that before."

Kim joins in at this point, "It did seem like all Lillah wanted to talk about was him earlier. Jared said Embry rescued her yesterday, so I didn't think it was weird, but now...."

I feel Emily watching me, waiting for a reaction, but I keep my eyes fixed on the rain. Emily sighs before continuing, "And, he's acting just like Sam did when he imprinted on me. Not really blaming Lillah, but hating her for 'ruining' his life."

At that moment, the waitress drops off my food. I look up to grab the ketchup, noticing they are all three staring at me. I sigh, but instead of answering the question I see in all of their eyes I respond to Emily's last statement, "I don't hate her. But that doesn't mean I trust her. She isn't supposed to know about us, she's an outsider. I mean, what do you three really know about her?"

Emily and Kim both turn to Rachel. I bite into my burger, using my hunger to hide how much I really want to find out about Lillah. I hope I can get this information without them realizing I'm digging.

Rachel glares at me before responding, "I know Lillah is wonderful. She's smart, hard working, and very nice. You'd know that if you'd stop growling every time she looks at you."

I pop a handful of French fries in my mouth to cover up my surprise. _Did I growl?_ After a few seconds of silence, I finally speak again, asking the question I'm not sure I want to know the answer to, "I just bet Lillah is wonderful, but who is she? I mean, who in her life is she going to talk to about us?"

I concentrate again on my burger and fries, trying not to notice Emily, Rachel, and Kim all looking at each other smugly after my question. Rachel folds her arms on the table, leaning forward to look me in the eyes as she speaks, "If you are asking if she's dating someone, as far as I know, no, she isn't. She did mention a jerk of an ex-boyfriend in Seattle. And I think her cousin has set her up on a few dates with some guys here. I think she went on a few double dates back in the summer, but nothing in a while."

All I can think while Rachel is speaking is, _No. She can't date anyone else. She's mine_. This just sets me off again. I can't believe how much she is messing with my mind, with my life. We've barely said more than "Hi" to one another and yet I want to find this guy in Seattle and kill him for hurting her and tell her cousin to stop setting her up. It's not normal.

I grab my glass, drinking all of my soda in two gulps. All three women are smiling. I hate this. They think they know, and yeah, they are right, but that doesn't mean I'm going to admit anything to them.

I smile politely at the waitress when she drops off the check and takes my plate. I turn back to the table, "Look, Sam and Jacob asked me to keep an eye on her," total lie, "make sure she keeps our secret. That's all. So any information you have about who she might blab to, great. Who's this cousin of hers?"

Rachel rolls her eyes and speaks for the trio, "Fine, don't tell us. We aren't blind, you know? Anyway, Lillah's cousin is Angela Weber. She went to high school with Bella, apparently they were very close back then. Angela lives in Lillah's house with her, like roommates. Lillah says the house is too big just for one person, which I have to agree, it's massive. She's in the big white house on Oak Lane."

I nearly choke at this piece of information, but I shouldn't be surprised. Of course she owns one of the biggest houses in Forks. She would need to have a big house to hold her collection of silver spoons.

I stand up quickly, grabbing the check. All three imprintees follow my lead and exit the booth. I turn to Rachel, "Look, I'm going to keep an eye on her from a distance, would you mind making sure she doesn't say anything at school? And she keeps her mouth shut with her cousin? Just text me or something if you think she isn't keeping our secret."

She nods slowly, pulling on her coat, "She won't tell anyone, Embry, but fine. Do me a favor?"

"Yeah, Rach, anything," I agree before thinking of the ramifications of my statement.

She speaks slowly, making sure to keep eye contact with me, "Be nice to her. It's not her fault, either way. She did nothing wrong. Please, she's my friend. I trust her."

"I'll do my best, Rach," turning around I head to the checkout counter. Emily, holding Eli in his car seat, Kim, and Rachel wave as they leave, having paid earlier.

I head towards the door but stop when I catch the faintest whiff of Lillah. I look around, trying to figure out where it's coming from when my eyes land on the coat rack. Of course. In her rush to get away from me she left it behind.

I step over, quickly grabbing the coat before anyone can notice what I'm doing and walk out the door. I sit in my truck for a few moments, letting the engine warm up. As I wait, I notice that one side of the jacket is heavier than the other. I reach into the heavier pocket and pull out her Blackberry. I resist the urge to put my number in her phone. I do, however, look up her number and program it into my cell phone.

Backing out of the parking lot, I intend to head straight to her house, ring the door bell, hand her the jacket and leave. But instead, I head home. I don't want to upset her. I know I should probably just call Rachel and ask her to stop by to pick it up, but I don't.

Her jacket rests on my lap as I drive, her already familiar scent surrounding me. Of course, I can rationalize my delay, I think she mentioned she had some errands to run this afternoon. I don't want to just leave the jacket on her front porch. I'll stop by her house later.

-0-

I check the clock, seeing that it is nearly five, I realize I can't wait any longer. Rachel has texted her a few times already. If I don't get the jacket and phone back to Lillah soon, Rachel is going to call in the whole pack.

I walk to my bedroom, pulling off all my clothes except my jeans. Heading out into the woods, I quickly remove the jeans and stuff them in the pouch tied around my ankle. Also safely tucked away in the pouch is her jacket, with the Blackberry back in the pocket as I found it.

I phase and start running through the trees. Normally I would drive, but I need the run to clear my mind before seeing her again. Jacob is patrolling, but luckily he leaves me alone.

I keep to the woods around Forks, but easily find the big white house on Oak Lane, which conveniently backs up to the woods. I quickly pull on my jeans and sling the jacket over my arm. I go around to the front of the house, figuring she might freak if I knock on the back door. As I approach, the front door swings open.

I'm surprised when I see the female that opened the door isn't Lillah. When she finally realizes I'm there, she's startled for a moment, taking a small step back. I expect her to close the door, but instead she squints, "Jacob?"

I walk up to the porch, standing just a few feet away from her now, "No, I'm a friend of Jacob's though. Embry."

"Oh," she smiles, friendly enough considering she is talking to a complete stranger, "Can I help you?"

I lift the jacket I have over my arm, "You're Angela, right? Your cousin, Lillah, she left her jacket at the Forks Coffee Shop this morning. Rachel asked me to return it to her."

Ok, small lie, Rachel didn't know Lillah had left the jacket behind, but knowing her, she would have asked me, so I don't feel completely guilty over this half-truth.

Angela smiles and opens the door wide, "Oh sure, come on in. Lillah's in the living room."

"Thanks."

After I walk through the door, Angela walks out, "I'm heading out for the night, mind telling Lillah when you see her? Thanks! Oh and it's nice to meet you."

I frown for a moment, surprised that she would leave her cousin alone in the house with a man she doesn't know, "Oh, okay."

"Don't worry, you're a friend of Jacob and Rachel's, I know I can trust you," she smirks. "Because if anything were to happen to Lillah while I was gone, Jacob would hurt you. I know this because my friend Bella Cullen is still very close with Jacob. If I asked Bella to ask Jacob to kick your ass, it would happen. Also, if you were to hurt Lillah, I know Rachel would come after you herself. And doesn't she have a huge boyfriend? I bet he would be happy to join Jacob in kicking your ass," Angela smiles and waves as she closes the door behind her. _Well_, _I guess I've been warned_.

I go left of the stairs in the center of the entrance way, not sure which way to the living room. I walk into the kitchen, slightly surprised at what I find. It's not flashy, even though there are high end appliances in here. Everything looks like it is used frequently, not just for show. There is a table in the room that looks like it was handmade, a hundred years or so ago. It's a beautiful mahogany that stands out against the white of the kitchen. I find myself liking this room.

I turn around and head back through the entry hallway to the right of the stairs. This must be the living room. As I walk into the room, I'm surprised at how homey this house feels. While it's big, I feel comfortable here. _Weird._

I don't see Lillah, but I smell her, I know she is near. I round the couch and my heart about stops. She's sound asleep, and the most beautiful woman I've ever seen. I set the jacket down on the coffee table and walk over to the couch, kneeling down in front of her.

I want to take all of her in, learn every part of her body. I figure it's easier to start from the bottom up, less overwhelming, but I'm wrong. I spot her toe nails, they are painted the same shade of pink as the nightie in my dream. At just the thought of the dream, I'm instantly hard again.

She's wearing very short shorts. Her thighs are just as I dreamed them to be last night. I'm dying to touch them, see if they are as soft as they look. But I don't need to touch them to know that I will be dreaming about every inch of them tonight. Especially what lies at their juncture.

My eyes slide over her hips. I want to grip those hips tight as I slowly enter her, watch her use those hips to torture me, riding me night after night.

I can tell that her stomach isn't perfectly flat, which I prefer. She's not fat, the memory of holding her in my arms yesterday, the ease in which I scooped her up, clear in my mind. No, she's perfect, curvy in all the right places, she looks healthy, and that's all the matters. The slight swell to her stomach reminds me of the daydream I had yesterday; her pregnant with my baby. _That's never going to happen if you don't accept her as your imprintee._

I try to ignore that thought as my eyes move up to her breasts. They are full and I know she isn't wearing a bra, her nipples are straining against her tank top. All I can think of is taking those nipples into my mouth, sucking and nipping until she moans in delight.

Her soft moan breaks the silence of the room, and I nearly jump up. I know I should move, leave. Instead, I lean closer to her, seeing she is starting to wake up. She lifts her hand towards my face, but I catch her hand, pulling it to my lips. I kiss her palm before she moves her hand to my face.

Her fingers gently caress my cheek as a smile softly blooms across her face. She sits up a bit more, leaning towards me. Her lips are nearly touching mine and I can no longer resist. I need to feel if those lips are as soft as they look. I need to taste her. _Make her mine._

I close my eyes, not wanting to look at her as I let my selfishness take over. If I were a good man, I'd let her walk away. Instead, I'm using her obvious need for me to explain why I'm giving in. It's for her. It's not because I want to feel her lips against mine.

I quickly close the gap between our lips. I intend to go slow, brush my lips across hers a few times and tease her. But I can't. As soon as our lips touch I can't get enough of her. I'm leaning over her, my elbows resting against the sofa on either side of her shoulders. My fingers are burying themselves in her thick hair. My tongue is teasing her lips for access into that mouth I dreamed of so clearly last night. My bare chest hovers above hers, her nipples grazing me through her thin tank top as her breathing increases.

She whimpers when I break our kiss so we can both catch our breath, "Shhh, I'm not going anywhere."

I pull back slightly enjoying the flush across her face, her swollen lips. Before I can look any longer, her hands are back in my hair, tugging me back to her. I release my grip on her hair and shake my head slightly, pulling her arms down to rest at her sides. My hands move to the edge of her tank top, slowly sliding my hands under the hem, watching her face to make sure she is ok with this. I slide my fingers over the soft skin of her stomach, the difference between the rough pads of my fingers and silkiness of her skin amazes me.

I'm mesmerized when my fingers reach the underside of her breasts. "Perfection. You were made for me," I slide my hands to cup her full breasts, rolling her pert nipple between my fingers, "you fit perfectly in my hands. So soft."

She moans softly as she lifts her chest to my hands, "God please don't let me wake up."

That stops me cold. I release her breasts, pulling my hands out from underneath her tank top and lean back, as far away as I can get. "You aren't fucking dreaming, Lie-lah."

She sits up immediately, gasping as reality sets in. I stand up and walk to the other side of the room, giving us both space to compose ourselves. I should have known. Someone like her, she would never willingly let me touch her if she were aware, if she was awake. My anger at myself boils over.

I turn to face her, trying to remain calm, "I'm sorry, that was…rude of me. I didn't mean to…touch you without your consent."

"Rachel asked me to return your jacket," I point to the reason why I'm here, sitting on the coffee table, "you left it at the diner today."

"Oh, um, ok, thanks," she stammers out, "and uh, thanks, again, for saving me, yesterday, that is."

I nod, "Sure. You might want to call Rachel, she's getting worried about you. And your cousin asked me to tell you she's heading out for the night. Sorry for the confusion, it won't happen again. Good night."

She whispers softly, "It's ok, I didn't mind the confusion," then a little louder, "I don't understand why you are so angry at me. I promise, I won't tell anyone your secret."

"I'm angry at the whole situation. I wish you had never come to La Push yesterday. You are a stranger, an outsider. You shouldn't know about us. Everything would have been fine if you hadn't been there. We could have all lived our lives without knowing..."

I turn to look at Lillah one last time. There are tears forming in her eyes. I want to run to her, but instead I pull the friendship bracelet out of my pocket, tossing it on the table next to her jacket. I smile sadly, "Looks like we eat the same cereal. Good night, and again, sorry for that, next time I'll make sure you know you are awake. I'll be making sure you keep that promise."

I leave through the back door, barely slamming it before I phase. I dash off the back porch and into the woods, my mind racing.

Lillah was dreaming about me? This is so much more fucking complicated than I ever imagined. _THIS_ is why I never wanted to imprint. The confusion, the heart ache, the need to protect, it's too much. I just want to live a simple life.

And whether I like it or not, it's not just me that is feeling this _need_. It kills me to think I've hurt her, but I know, this is not what she deserves. She deserves someone that could afford to live in that big house with her.

But no matter how much I tell myself I have to stop this, just go home, I can't help but to stay in the woods outside her house. To keep an eye on her. To make sure _my Lillah_ is safe.

_It's just because she's home alone._ I know I'm lying to myself, but right now, that's all I have.

-0-

**A/N**: Awww, his Lillah. Think there is a chance he could maybe accept her? And what's he going to do now that he has her phone number? Lillah's up next! And we promise, this should be the end of the overlapping chapters!


	5. Chapter 5 Pretend to Feel No Pain

**Chapter 5 "Pretend To Feel No Pain"**

**Disclaimer:** We don't own much. Just a lot of TV on DVD sets, a ton of lip glosses that we never wear and a set of chop sticks that we use to pull our hair up. SM owns everything except for Lillah, Carter and Eli. Oh, and our storyline.

**A/N:** This is a REALLY long chapter, we are aware. Lillah just had a lot to tell us! Thanks as always to our AMAZING beta DailyiCandy! She puts up with a LOT from us, including long ass chapters that never seem to end. Most chapters won't be this long, don't worry.

_Drop his name  
Push it in and twist the knife again  
Watch my face  
As I pretend to feel no pain_  
"Heartbreak Warfare" - John Mayer

**LPOV**

When I woke up Monday morning the haze that I was under had begun to clear. As I ran the night back over in my head, I started remembering things. I guess in my post kiss mind I didn't really 'hear' Embry's parting words. But now, thinking back on it, I hear his voice clearly in my mind. After we kissed, he said, "Next time I'll make sure you know you are awake". _He's planning on a 'next time'?_ This thought floats in and out of my head over the next couple of days.

Overall, the next few days are okay, but the memories and dreams of Embry keep haunting me, both in my sleep and in my daydreams. As I'm getting dressed Wednesday morning, I decide it's a great day to wear my cute new pencil skirt and blouse. There is nothing like a great outfit to make a girl feel better about herself and life.

I had picked up the outfit a couple of weekends ago on a shopping trip in Seattle with my mom. While I'm definitely not a fashionista, I love to find feminine things to wear and this is probably one of my favorite outfits now. The best part, the outfit goes perfectly with a pair of patent leather heels that I've been dying to wear since I found them on sale. Sadly, even in three inches heels I am still shorter than most of my students.

After my morning run and shower I didn't have time to do much with my hair so I twisted it at the nape of my neck and allowed tendrils to fall around my face in loose cascades. I take one last look in the mirror. "Not great, but not too bad."

My morning classes went surprisingly well; the students that usually give me trouble were quiet and paid attention to my lesson. I had no real complaints from anyone when I asked for rough drafts of their history papers. A few even informed me they were completely finished with their final copy.

Rachel and I had lunch together in the teachers' lounge with a few other staff members, which meant we couldn't really 'talk'. The afternoon breezed by as quickly and easily as the morning did. Shortly after the final bell rang, Rachel and I walking out together.

I had noticed that Rachel's car was older and more rundown than I would expect, especially given what I know about the wolves and their need to protect their imprintees. I often wait until I see her pull away before I leave the school lot, not wanting to leave her there stranded.

This afternoon is no different. I adjust my defrost and switch CDs in the while I wait on her to get settled and start her own car, but it doesn't start. Rachel climbs out of her car and runs the short distance to mine. Rolling down my window just a crack, I tell her to get in.

Rachel calls Paul, explaining the situation. I can hear he is getting upset over the phone. When Rachel hangs up, I look at her, concerned, "You don't think he's so upset he's going to phase?"

"That?" Rachel points at the phone. I nod once and she laughs, "That was nothing. He's just pissed because it's broken down. I'm sure he'll be fine." She waves her hand around in the air, like the whole situation is no big deal.

"Why is he pissed it's broken down? I mean, it's an older car; of course it will break down. If he's so worried, why don't you just get rid of that car and buy something that is more reliable?"

When Rachel responds she seems puzzled, like this idea is completely foreign to her. "Well, Paul and I are more focused on paying for our wedding and getting our house set up like we want it."

Before I can respond, we see Paul pull into the lot and park next to Rachel's beat up Saturn. As Rachel starts to open her door and climb out, I do so as well, hoping to say hi to Paul.

I don't notice that someone is with him at first because of the heavy fog. As soon as my feet hit the asphalt, I realize someone is exiting the passenger seat of Paul's truck.

"Damn," I mutter under my breath when I see it's Embry.

I had been wanting to ask Rachel what happened with Embry after I left the diner a few days ago. I'm afraid that it'll give away the truth so I decided not to mention it. My face is always so easy to read, I can't risk her finding out that I might have a crush on someone I could never possibly obtain.

As I watch Embry hug Rachel tightly, I know I have two options. I can turn tail and run, or I can just face him head on. I step across the cracked parking lot, walking closer so they can see me through the fog. Embry looks up, seeming surprised that I'm approaching. I haven't been really looking forward to seeing him again; now I know why. He is so different in my dreams, he is caring and gentle and always smiling at me. Seeing him now, like this, only makes it worse. I can tell he isn't interested in me and doesn't want me the same way that I want him.

In my dreams, he is mine and mine alone. I can feel his arms wrapped around me tightly, as if he's really there with me. When I wake up in the morning, I can still taste his lips on mine, and my skin tingles all over where he's touched me.

My annoyance has been building over the past few days. Not only do I feel sexually deprived, a completely new sensation for me, but he's weakening the walls I've built so carefully. I find myself wanting to get to know him. I kind of hate him for that.

"Hi Lie-lah," he smirks as he mispronounces my name. It's on purpose, I am sure.

I squint my eyes at him, giving him my best 'now you're in trouble' look that I usually save for my students, "It's Lil-lah," I explain with an even tone, "Or Ms. Hunter."

He shakes his head, "I won't ever call you Ms. Hunter, so you can get off that high horse, Lie-lah".

I can feel the heat rising under my blouse and I know that I'm blushing all over. I realize he's only doing this to piss me off, but I can't help but react when he goads me. I alternate between wanting to jump him and wanting to punch him; I'm not sure which would be the best option.

I watch as his eyes travel all over me. Over my blouse, my skirt and then down my legs to my feet and back up again. He has a dark scowl on his face, that makes me want to back away and climb into my car.

I look down at my feet, self-consciousness coursing though me, no longer feeling sure about my _favorite_ outfit. The idea that he would be displeased slices through me. He doesn't seem phased that he might have hurt my feelings and continues on, commenting that he'd hate for the outfit _my daddy_ bought me to get ruined by standing in the rain.

Seeing him now, having him make fun makes my eyes sting, and my eyelid start twitching.

I can't help the words that come out of my mouth, "You know, I've been trying to figure out where I've heard your name before," I begin and he rolls his eyes at me.

"Probably from Rachel," he says deadpan and gives me a look like he thinks I'm a dumb blonde.

"No, that's not it. It took me a couple of days but I finally figured it out. Years ago, when she was younger, my mom had a crush on a soap opera character named Embry," I say, smugly. "Were you named after him?"

He looks up at me from fiddling under the hood of the car. His eyes narrow dangerously before he slams down the hood. I watch as he gives Rachel a look and walks over to her, mumbling before taking off in the direction of the woods that border the school. _Well then. You can dish it out but you can't take it_.

I grow even more annoyed, whether its with myself or him I'm not sure, because all I want to do is call him back to me.

-0-

I burst through the trees, slowing my run a little so my muscles won't cramp up. I'd been running faster and faster down the trail, feeling like someone - _something_, was watching me. It wasn't necessarily eerie but it wasn't exactly comforting.

I jog up onto the porch and stretch my legs, using the large pillar for leverage. Turning my head to look over my shoulder I strain to see through the driving rain that started earlier. I still feel like someone is watching me from the edge of the trees but I don't see anything.

Finishing up my stretches, I stand and twist my upper body around, trying to relieve the stress and tension in my back. I straighten up, and walk across the porch, into the house. The weather had been unusually nice and rain free the past few days and I've had my windows open to let some fresh air in, but I run to close them as soon as I enter the house.

This was my second run for the day. I usually prefer to run in the morning; it helps get me moving first thing and gives me energy throughout the day. On days like today, I run twice, once in the morning and then once in the evening. I've been on edge, ever since, well- I saw Embry.

I frown at myself when I think of him. I go into the kitchen, to check the chicken I had left in the oven while I went for my run, and decide to give it a few more minutes. The pasta and steamed vegetables that I plan to include won't take long so I decide to go take a nice hot shower to loosen my muscles.

As I walk back through my bedroom I begin to pull off my running clothes and turn on my iHome. I need the distraction of music and hope that it will help calm my rattled nerves. "In my Head" begins to play and it makes me smile and do a little dance as I walk around the foot of my bed. I pull my shirt over my head and my breasts feel slightly sore when they are released from their confinement.

I reach up and take them in my hands for a second, trying to relieve the dull pain. My nipples strain against my hands and I nibble on my bottom lip before taking them between my fingers. I squeeze them gently, like Embry had done but it doesn't feel as good, it doesn't send that tingle through my body. I release my flesh and drop my hands, shrugging my shoulders.

In the shower it takes me longer than I expected because I keep zoning out in between washing my hair and shaving my legs. The steam in the bathroom reminds me of the fog that surrounded us in the school parking lot. I begin daydreaming about having Embry here with me, completing the dream from a few days ago. Him pining me against the shower wall, driving into me fast and hard.

I groan and flip the knob to cut the water off and reach out to grab a towel. I do not want to be seeing him like this, everywhere I look, every time I close my eyes. I find myself thinking of him during the most mundane tasks and then I get distracted. Just yesterday I was doing laundry and realized the washer would be a nice place to have him take me. It's the right height with him being taller than me.

I grumble as I walk around my room, pulling out clothes and yanking a brush through my wet hair. I don't know why he has me so wrapped around his finger.

I go into the kitchen and finish up my dinner preparations, only half noticing what I'm doing. Chicken, pasta and veggies go on my plate and I carry it into the living room.

I sit on the couch, just like most nights, eating while watching Food Network or an old movie. My only variation tonight is that I'm sipping a glass of wine to try to calm my jagged nerves. Seeing Embry today was a bit more than I could handle.

I love spending time with Rachel, and Paul seems like a really nice guy so I didn't mind waiting with her until he arrived to fix her car. I wasn't expecting him to bring someone with him. Embry seems like he can be a nice guy. Rachel wouldn't be friends with him if he wasn't, but for some reason, he hates me. I know I shouldn't care, but I do.

I decide to go to bed early, but I can't fall asleep, thoughts of Embry run through my mind constantly. My phone beeps with a new text message just as I count my three hundredth sheep. I want to ignore it, but some part of me hopes that it's Embry. I reach for my phone and want to throw it across the room when I read the message. It's from a number I don't recognize, but the message is familiar, "I need you." Stupid Carter probably got a new phone number just to throw me off. I turn the phone off, not wanting to be disturbed any further tonight.

-0-

On Thursday Rachel and I go to lunch together at the diner. We both feel the need to get away from the other staff for a bit. I haven't had the chance to talk to Rachel about anything over the past couple of days. I've been swamped with grading papers and then, cheer practices to prepare for the football game tomorrow. I've been using that as an excuse, to be honest.

We order quickly and our food is brought out before we begin talking about anything important. I can tell something has been on Rachel's mind the last day or so. I don't want to pry because I know there are things that she can't really tell me.

"Could I ask you something?"

"Mhm, you can always ask me whatever you want. No guarantee I can answer but I'll try," Rachel places her soda on the table and watches me.

"At breakfast with you and the girls, Kim called Embry a 'wolf whore'. Why is that?" I pause for a second before looking up at her.

My phone alerts me to another new text. I glance at the screen and see "Carter Baldwin" on the display. _Not again._

So much for my theory that he got a new number. _Surely he's not crazy enough to be sending me messages from two numbers?_ I ignore it and slip it into my purse before looking at Rachel expectantly.

"Embry, out of all of the guys, is probably the 'wild one'. Most of the guys imprinted fairly young so for Embry to be twenty-two years old and not imprinted on someone yet, it's odd. We all have just assumed that he never would." Rachel sighs.

"He sleeps around, Lillah, since he doesn't really have anyone. If he dated girls like a normal guy, it would be hard for him to keep what he is a secret. So he sticks with one night stands."

I knew what she, Kim and Emily meant originally, but hearing it actually broken down for me in such a way - it makes me sad. I take several small bites of my food before I'm able to continue. I know I have to change the subject before I make an idiot out of myself by asking more questions. I keep reminding myself that I don't want Rachel to realize I'm interested in him.

"How's your car? Did Paul figure out what's wrong with it?" I ask while I add dressing to my salad and begin to cut up the wedges of tomato.

"Um, yeah, it's fine now," she waves a hand in the air dismissively.

I find this suspicious and wait for her to continue but she never does.

"What was wrong with it?" I probe just a little more.

"It was just something simple. No big deal," Rachel shrugs and doesn't meet my eyes.

Oh yeah, something is definitely going on.

"Rach, is there something that you aren't telling me? Is everything ok?" I cock my head to the side and look at her face, trying to gauge her expression. She's giving nothing away.

She picks up a fry and dips it in ketchup, "Well, you know that most of the guys work at the shop on the Rez right?"

"I didn't... but okay," I place my fork on my plate and wait for her to continue.

"Well, it's Sam's shop, but the guys, they are all really good with cars. Jake and Embry are the best."

_Of course Embry is the best-_ "So..."

"Well, you remember the whole thing about imprinting, the guys feeling like they HAVE to take care of us. Paul would never let me drive my car if he thought it would break down. The guys check our cars regularly; in fact, Embry looked at mine last Saturday."

"Ok, but your car _did_ break down, Rach."

"No, it didn't, and Embry knew as soon as he looked at it yesterday that it hadn't broken down."

"Well then what was wrong with it?"

She hesitates then finally admits, "I disconnected the battery cables. The guys have taught me enough that I knew it wouldn't start then."

I frown and look at her, "Why would you do that?"

"Because you and Embry are being so stubborn with all of this. I can tell you are both interested in each other, I just figured if I got him to come look at the car, maybe you two could talk, work things out."

"What do you mean 'work things out'? Rachel, there is nothing to work out. He isn't interested in me. At all."

"Really? Is that what you honestly think, Lillah? You can't be that blind. You have to see how he looked at you in the two seconds you've been around one another. I thought he was going to eat you up."

I blink several times, "Rach, I know what I look like. I couldn't keep Carter interested and I dated him for years. What in the world makes you think that _Embry_ would ever want me?"

Rachel frowns at my intensity and demands to know what I'm talking about.

"You are beautiful, Lillah. You're smart and funny. Any man would be _damn_ lucky to have you."

"It's not about being smart and funny, Rachel. Those aren't things that keep a guy like Carter, a guy like Embry, interested for long."

Rachel's face grows dark and she scoffs, "Maybe you didn't hear me the first time, Lill. You. Are. Beautiful. Your skin is like porcelain, you have the most unusual and beautiful eyes I've ever seen. I would kill for your hair. Do you know how much it sucks to have stick straight hair?"

I feel the blush crawl up my neck to my cheeks as she appraises me, listing things and ticking them off with her fingers.

"Skin, eyes and hair don't make a man want to keep you, Rachel. There are just some women that men don't find appealing. I've grown accustomed to being one of them."

Flopping back against the booth, Rachel just stares at me. This time I'm the one leaving _her_ speechless. _Well, that's a first. _I smile smugly when she doesn't have a ready comeback. It's understandable though because I already know what I am. I've seen myself many times.

"Lillah. I'm going to say something to you and I don't want you to get offended," Rachel leans forward, placing her elbows on the table.

"That is the stupidest thing I've _ever_ heard you say. You are an idiot. It is completely untrue and unfounded. Why would you even think that a man wouldn't find you sexy or attractive? You are curvy and lush. Hell, if I were a guy, I'd be on you so fast you wouldn't know what hit you."

I roll my eyes and take a deep breath before I open my mouth to speak.

"I appreciate it, Rachel, I really do. It's just that I know guys don't look at me the way they do other women, like you for example. I don't have that 'thing' that they are looking for. I don't mesmerize them or make them want to keep coming back for more," I hold my hand up when she opens her mouth to interrupt.

"I'm okay with that. It's not a big deal. I'm happy. I have what I always wanted."

"Lill, I don't think that you have everything that you ever wanted. I can't imagine you not wanting to fall in love with someone. To get married and have a family. I know I haven't known you very long but it just doesn't seem like you. I don't believe for one second that you want to be the matronly 'aunt' to the children of your friends."

"Well, no, it didn't start out that way. I had dreams just like every other teenage girl. I wanted to meet someone and fall instantly in love with him. To have him fall madly in love with me. It took me a while to get used to the idea of it not happening. Especially not having a family of my own. After I started dating Carter and he didn't want the same thing I did at the time, I put my wants to the side."

"You should NEVER to do that," Rachel speaks quietly but firmly, leaning close to me.

"Loving someone shouldn't be that way. Do you think most of the couples you see make that kind of sacrifice? If Carter had wanted kids and you didn't, would you have expected him to give that up?"

I shake my head 'no', understanding what she is saying, but not really willing to say so.

"No way in hell should you give up something for a douche like him. I am so thankful you caught him cheating and broke things off. Don't get me wrong, I'm sad he was cheating and that it hurt you. But I'm definitely not sad that it ended your relationship."

I lean back against my seat, thinking about what she's just said to me. It makes perfect sense coming out of her mouth but I could never convince myself of the same things in the past. I'm so lost in thought that I don't really notice when I start talking. I'm on auto-pilot, telling her about one night in particular that Carter and I had gone out to a party, a rare occurrence for us.

_A typical 'night out' with him was like a frat party. I remember one night during our junior year at UoW, we were at a birthday party for someone we knew, only vaguely._

_I was in the living room talking to a girl about her daunting job search. I began to wonder what was taking Carter so long. He'd left me to grab himself another beer, even though I'd begged him to slow down._

_Before he walked away he rolled his eyes and said to me, "Woman, don't fucking tell me when to stop drinking," and then slapped my ass._

_I'm not a violent person but in that moment, I wanted to punch him in the face._

_I'd never really gone from loving someone to loathing them before until him. After what I felt like was more than enough time for him to get a new drink I excused myself and moved toward the kitchen. Someone told me he'd disappeared a few minutes before, mumbling something about "taking a piss". I was fairly sure I knew better than that and figured I'd find him face first in the toilet. Carter was a horrible drunk. He didn't know how to drink in moderation, or how to pace himself, so he'd always end up sick just a couple of hours after he started._

_I'd walked down the hallway toward the bathroom. I knocked on the door but didn't hear a peep from him. I waited a few long seconds before trying the door knob, finding it unlocked, I pushed it open. I found him in there with a girl who was doing unspeakable things to - another guy. Carter was so drunk that he had passed out in the bathtub, unaware of what was going on. I turned and walked out. I left him behind and drove myself home._

_I should have known it would happen eventually. He could never go out with me unless he was drunk or was planning to get drunk. He said it was the only way he could handle being seen with me and my 'fat ass'. I didn't really believe for a second that I was fat but I knew that I wasn't desirable either. He took as many opportunities as possible to tell me so. My hips were too round, my stomach not flat enough, my thighs to thick._

_All I ever thought he enjoyed on my body were my breasts and ass. Ironically they are proportioned to the rest of my body. If I'd been thinner, they'd have both been flat. There were very few moments that Carter ever complimented me. After a while, I grew accustomed to it and it didn't really phase me anymore. Looking back, it's sad that I put up with someone like him._

_He was such a heartless bastard. The entire time I dated him he would gift me with gym memberships and personal trainers for any and all holidays. Those 'gifts' were what made me start thinking about taking up running. I didn't do that until after we'd split. I'd secretly hoped that it would piss him off._

When I come to the end of my little story I look up to find Rachel glowering and mumbling. "Fucking jackass. Douche bag. Cock gobbler. Dorkdick. No good, two timing rat bastard."

"Wow. That's a uh, interesting vocabulary you have there," I try not to laugh at her anger.

"What can I say? I have a brother. I'm around a lot of guys," she shrugs and picks up her drink, sipping it daintily.

"Besides, Paul likes it when I talk dirty."

I laugh and then cringe at that last part, "Woah, too much information, Rachel. I do not need to know some things."

She stares off into space, a smile on her face before she looks at me. She wiggles her eyebrows, "I bet Embry would like to hear dirty talk coming out of those pouty lips of yours."

"Oh dear G-. Are you ready to get back to school? We are going to be late for our next class," I hide my face by preoccupying myself with my purse, choosing to ignore that last statement entirely.

"Whatever. One of these days I'm going to have you telling me all of your dirty secrets," Rachel assures me as we walk outside to my car.

"That shouldn't be too difficult," I reply.

"I don't have any dirty secrets. I'm a blank slate."

"Maybe you are right now. But you won't be after Embry gets his hands on you."

"RACHEL! He's not getting his hands on me. Period. End of-"

I pause and stop walking, squinting to see up the street. Someone has caught my attention.

It's Embry and he's carrying a beautiful young woman on his back. Her legs are around his waist and he has his arms around her thighs, holding her up. They are both laughing. I know this because I can not only see the smiles on their faces but I also hear clear tinkling female laughter. She looks young, maybe in her late teens. She has her arms wrapped around his neck and her face is next to his. He looks happy and carefree.

It's the first time I've ever seen him like that and it makes my heart clinch. I am jealous but I don't have the right to be. I don't have any claim on him. We don't even get along, but I want to be the one that makes him feel that way.

I want to be the one that he carries on his back. The one that he laughs with and teases. The one that he dreams of every night and can't wait to see every morning. It isn't logical in the least but I don't care about logic right now.

"'End of' what?" Rachel snaps her fingers in front of my face.

I look down and mutter, "End of discussion," and then climb into my car to drive us back to school.

-0-

Emily texts me as Rachel and I are walking back into the school from lunch. She asks if I'd like to join her and the rest of the girls for dinner. I had planned on spending the evening grading papers but her invitation sounds much more enticing. I enjoyed breakfast so much last weekend that I don't even consider saying no.

I spend the remainder of the school day anticipating the evening. I haven't looked forward to something like this in a long time. The thought that I might end up being good friends with these ladies has me giddy.

As soon as the final bell rings I make a bee line for the school parking lot. Rachel and I wave to one another and go our separate ways. I don't waste time once I get home. I change clothes quickly, pulling on a pair of faded and ripped jeans, a long sleeve t-shirt and a pair of hiking boots. I don't bother checking the limited amount of make-up I slapped on this morning, simply pulling my hair into a high ponytail. I grab my keys and phone and go jump in my car.

I drive a little faster than I should but I'm in a hurry to get where I'm going. There is music blasting through my speakers and I'm doing a little dance while I sing to "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun". The directions Rachel gave me to Emily's place are easy to follow and I arrive pretty quickly.

I see several other cars in the driveway and yard in front of the house. I pull up next to Rachel's Saturn, jumping out quickly. Emily is holding the front door open as I step onto the porch. She quickly pulls me into a hug and ushers me inside.

"Thank you for having me in your home, Emily."

I grin at her and hand her a bottle of wine, "I've been saving this for a while. I wanted to wait and open it when I had a reason to celebrate something."

"New friends seems like a good enough reason to celebrate to me," Emily smiles and takes my hand, pulling me into the living room with her.

As soon as I walk in I'm greeted by Rachel and Kim. There is also an adorable little girl sitting on the floor, playing with Eli.

"Lillah this is my niece, Claire. Claire, this is Ms. Lillah," Emily gestures before dropping down on the floor.

"Hey there, Claire. It's nice to meet you," I shake her hand and wink.

"You are a beautiful little girl," I tell her as she looks up at me and smiles brightly.

"Thank you, Ms. Lillah. Would you like to play with me and Eli?"

"I would love to play with you," I smile at her and take a seat on the floor. Eli smiles at me and waves his hand in the air wildly.

"Hey there, handsome. How's it going?"

Claire hands me the baby doll she has cradled in her arms, "Here, you can hold my baby."

"That's so sweet of you. I would love to hold your baby," I smile softly at her when she hands me the bottle to 'feed' the baby.

"I like you, Ms. Lillah. You're pretty."

"Oh. Tha-thank you, Claire," I feel a blush start to cover my face.

"You're welcome!" Claire shrugs and smiles at me as if it's nothing.

I want to pick her up and cuddle her in my lap for the rest of the night. I sit and watch her play with Eli and her plethora of dolls and Barbie's that cover the floor. Claire has the cutest cherub face, dark eyes and long black hair that curls at the ends. I notice how well behaved she is and how sweet she is with baby Eli. I start to envision my own babies sitting on the living room floor of my house.

After a few minutes of chatter and laughter Emily tells us dinner is ready and we all stand to go into the kitchen. She's made lemon pepper baked chicken, mashed potatoes and steamed vegetables. It smells incredible and it makes my mouth begin to water.

"Lillah brought wine. I'll grab some glasses. You guys have a seat."

The three of us sit down at the small table in the dining room and begin to serve ourselves from the heaping bowls of food.

While eating we talk about work, families and current happenings. I don't really want to bring up the wolf thing with Claire here. I'm not sure what she knows, if anything, and I don't want to upset her. I'm surprised at how long we've been sitting at the table when I notice Eli yawning in his high chair. Emily picks him up and takes Claire's hand.

"It's time for good night kisses, " Emily passes Eli to Rachel, who begins kissing all over his face before passing him on to Kim.

Claire comes directly to me and wraps her arms around my neck, squeezing me tightly.

"Good night, Ms. Lillah. You don't be a stranger," she tells me seriously and the ladies and I laugh.

I pick her up and hug her and she turns her face to kiss my cheek. It takes me by surprise and I blink several times because my eyes have gotten misty.

Claire hops down off of my lap and moves on to the other ladies while Kim passes Eli to me. I pull him into my arms and inhale his sweet baby scent before I kiss the side of his neck.

I pass him back to Emily, whispering softly and blowing him a kiss, "Good night Eli."

While Emily is gone Rachel, Kim and I clean up the kitchen, putting away the leftovers and washing dishes. We talk quietly, not wanting to draw attention to ourselves and keep the children from going to bed.

"Where are the guys tonight?" I ask. I'm curious because Sam isn't home and he doesn't seem the type to be out late.

"There's a wolf meeting at Daddy's house," Rachel explains as she passes me a casserole dish to dry.

"A wolf meeting? Is everything okay?" I'm instantly worried about Embry, though I know I have no right to worry about him.

"Yeah, I'm sure everything is fine. They do this on occasion. Just to touch base and make sure that all is quiet in the western front," Kim takes the dish from my hand and puts it in a cabinet.

"Oh," I nod in understanding just as Emily walks back into the kitchen.

"Are we ready for dessert? I thought we could take it into the living room and have a real talk now that the babies are in bed," Emily asks us as she pulls the lid off of a cake plate.

"Em. Is that your homemade chocolate cake?" Rachel moans and moves next to Emily.

"I'll take a slice this big," she tells her and demonstrates, spreading her arms wide.

"Rachel, you can't have half of the cake to yourself. Leave some for the rest of us," Emily pokes Rachel with her elbow until she backs away.

"Help yourselves to drinks while I cut the cake."

I take a bottle of water that Kim offers me. My eyes grow wide when I see the slice of cake Emily hands me.

"Go. Sit. Eat. Every bite," Emily smirks when she sees the look on my face.

I laugh and pretend to salute her then slowly walk into the living room.

Rachel, Kim and Emily join me in succession. We each take a seat, getting ourselves comfortable before the gossip starts.

"God, Emily, this is amazing. Do you share the recipe?" I ask around a mouthful of the decadent cake.

"I'd be happy to share with you, Lillah. As long as you bring me some when you make it," Emily grins and licks the back of her fork.

"You got a deal! I think I might have an orgasm just from eating it," I say before I can stop myself.

Rachel, Kim and Emily all three laugh and nod, understanding exactly what I'm talking about.

"Speaking of orgasms," Rachel begins but I stop her, throwing my hand in the air and telling her that I do not want details of her and Paul's sexcapades.

"What?" Rachel looks around the room innocently, "I wasn't going to..."

"Right," Emily snorts and shakes her head, "We know better, don't we, Kim?"

"Unfortunately we know every little sound he makes," Kim cringes.

She's obviously reliving some memorable conversations because she shudders and gags.

"But imagine being the guys? They can't hide anything from one another. At least for us, we only know the things that we share," Emily says.

"They can read each other's minds?" I am surprised by this new detail.

I visualize myself lying on the couch and Embry hovering over me, his hands sliding under my shirt. I feel my face heat up and I try not to call more attention to myself by saying anything else.

"Well, not really 'read minds'. It's a little different," Kim speaks up.

"When they are in wolf form, they can 'see' and 'hear' things. Pass messages back and forth and show each other images. Kind of like a movie? But they can block out what they don't want to show. It's just that sometimes, it's hard to do. They let stuff slip."

"And sometimes, they let things slip on purpose, just to tease each other. Like Paul allowing Jake to see him and Rachel doing the nasty," Emily pipes up.

Rachel rolls her eyes, "Yeah, that's kind of how you ended up here, Lillah."

She leans forward and places her plate on the coffee table before continuing, "Paul and Jacob were arguing about me the day you saw him phase. Jacob is paranoid that I'm going to get knocked up like Emily did."

"HEY! I didn't get 'knocked up', thank you very much. You make it sound awful. My pregnancy wasn't planned but it was entirely my fault. I forgot to take a few pills here and there and then bam. Baby boy on the way."

"Why would that upset Jacob?" I ask Rachel.

I'm not sure how this works but I'd think they would want their genes to be passed on.

"He just doesn't want me pregnant before Paul and I get married is all."

"Oh. Well I guess I can understand that..."

"He's just being ridiculous because he's my brother and he's probably seen me screaming Paul's name while I cum," Rachel says rather bluntly.

Rachel pauses, then continues, "But that is really gross so yeah, I can understand why it would piss him off."

"Yeah, I doubt that any sibling wants to see something like that," I laugh.

"Anyway. How do you feel about seeing Embry again, Lillah? Do you think the two of you can work things out?" Emily looks at me expectantly.

Before I answer her, I glance at Kim and Rachel. They all look overly curious about where he and I stand.

"Um, there's nothing to work out," I tell them lamely.

My face is heating up once more because there are visions of him and I together, me pressing my breast into his hand.

"Wait. Why are you blushing? Did something happen?" Rachel of course notices this time and pounces on me.

"No. Nothing happened. Absolutely not," I deny quickly, making myself look guilty.

"Spill." Emily says with determination.

"Yeah, Lillah, we want to know," Kim chimes in.

A smile spreads across her face and I want to call her a traitor for not backing me up.

"Fine. He came over Sunday evening. By the way, thanks for having the guy that hates my guts bring my jacket back to me, Rachel."

I've been scraping my fork across my plate without realizing so I place it on the stack on the coffee table.

"Wh-what? What are you talking about, Lillah? I didn't send him to your house. With or without a jacket," Rachel sits up straight so that she can look me in the eye.

Normally I would think she was up to no good but this time I can tell that she is honestly confused.

"You didn't? Then how did he get my jacket?"

"I don't know," Rachel shrugs, "Did you leave it at the diner?"

"Well, yeah, I did. I forgot it on the coat rack. My phone was in the pocket too."

"He must have noticed it and grabbed it. Despite his recent actions, Embry is a really nice guy, Lillah." Emily leans over the arm of the chair she's sitting in and touches the back of my hand.

"How would he have known it was mine?" I say this more to myself than to the girls.

"He probably caught your scent on it. Their sense of smell is pretty amazing," Emily explains.

It sounds logical but there is still something about the scenario that doesn't make sense.

"Jacket aside, what happened when he was there?" Rachel skims over the reason for him being in my house and gets right to the part she thinks is gossip worthy.

"Nothing happened. He just dropped it off and left," I lie completely.

"Really? I mean, nothing? No apologies for being an ass? No nothing?" Rachel is starting to frown.

"Well. I mean. He sort of kissed me," I finally cave in.

Mostly I want to tell them because it might give me some insight into why he's so hot and cold.

"He 'sort' of kissed you? How do you 'sort of kiss' someone?"

"He just - I mean, I don't know. I was asleep and Angela let him in. I woke up but I thought I was dreaming and I guess _I_ kissed _him_..."

"What the hell, Lillah? Why didn't you tell me this on Monday?"

"I don't know, Rachel. It's not a big deal, really."

"The hell it isn't," Kim has her knees bent up so that she could wrap her arms around them and rest her chin.

She is looking at me, waiting for me to go on, "Give us the juicy details. A kiss from Embry is more than a _big_ deal."

I continue to deny that it means anything and the girls and I finally agree to disagree after a few minutes of back and forth questions. I consider asking them to please keep it quiet but I don't want to hurt their feelings and make them think I don't trust them. I just know that if the other guys find out and if they mention it to Embry, I'll die of embarrassment.

To distract myself I begin to look at the pictures Emily has framed and sitting on the end table and coffee table. There are different snap shots of Eli, Claire, Emily and Sam together and in different groupings. I notice several of the pictures are of Claire and one of the guys. They both look extremely happy to be together. Claire is smiling her cute snaggle tooth grin and he is beaming with pride.

"Are all of you close?" I ask to the room at large while I pick up the picture of the smiling duo.

"Yeah, pretty close. We consider each other family," Emily leans over to look at the picture that I'm holding.

"That's Quil. Claire insists on having pictures of just the two of them every time the camera is pulled out."

"It's a cute picture. I assume that the guys spend a lot of time with Claire and Eli?"

"Oh, of course. But Claire and Quil spend the most time together. He comes over to play with her often. Daily, really. He can't stay away from her and she gets whiny when she doesn't see her Quily," Emily, Rachel and Kim chuckle at the nickname.

"Does he just really like kids or something?" I don't understand why he'd be so interested in hanging out with a little girl. Family or not.

"No. Lillah, Claire, she's Quil's imprintee," Emily says this slowly, as if she's afraid of my reaction.

"Claire? She's Quil's imprintee? She's so young. And the age difference, by the time she's eighteen, he'll be old, won't he?" I place the photo back on the table.

"Not as long as he keeps phasing. Remember, Billy mentioned that as long as the guys phase, they don't age."

Right. I do remember hearing him say that now. There are just so many different circumstances surrounding this group that I'm afraid I won't be able to keep up.

"Can I ask something? About imprinting?"

"Yes, of course."

"Do they only imprint on someone from the tribe?"

"Oh, not always. I'm actually Makah, like Embry's mom. I was here visiting my cousin, Leah, when I met Sam. It's a long story but Sam and Leah were dating at the time. And he imprinted on me," Emily explains.

"But the imprintees are always someone Native American, right? Never someone that isn't a descendant of Native Americans?" I don't know why I'm determined to nail this information down but I just have to know the details.

"Yeah, sort of. Other than Ness, we are all Native," Emily says hesitantly and then throws a glance at Rachel and Kim, who are both oddly quiet.

Great. Leave it to me to have a crush on someone that wouldn't be willing to give me the time of day, even if he didn't hate me.

I talk to the girls for a while longer. When I realize what time it is I stand to go, hugging each of them. We discuss doing this again sometime soon. I tell them that I'd love to 'host' if they'd allow it next time. After another round of hugs I step outside and take a deep breath while walking to my car. The more I learn about these legends and their way of life, the more I want to know.

I drive home in silence, hitting the power knob on my radio to turn it off. I have so much to think about that my brain is too cluttered for any kind of noise.

When I pull into my driveway and see the dark house it makes me sad there isn't anyone there to greet me. I unlock the door, drop my purse and keys on the entry table, walk into my bedroom and fall into bed. I don't even muster up the energy to change out of my clothes. I just need to dream.

_In my head, I see you all over me  
In my head, you fulfill my fantasy  
You'll be screaming more  
In my head, its going down  
In my head, its going down  
In my head_

"In My Head" - Jason Derulo

**A/N:** So there we go. A little more background on Lillah and a bit of interaction with the girls. Don't you just love them?


	6. Chapter 6 Black Holes and Revelations

**Chapter 6 "Black Holes and Revelations"**

**Disclaimer:** We only own a few things. A MacBook that has seen better days, a rockin' new laptop; Lillah, Carter and Eli. We definitely do not own Twilight or SM's characters. We just like to play with them.

**A/N:** Have we mentioned we have the best beta? Daily_i_Candy rocks our socks off! Plus, the pictures she shares are totally drool worthy! Thanks for everything bb! Also, just a little warning, our boy is going to have a rough few days, just be prepared.

_Our hopes and expectations_

_Black holes and revelations_

_Hold you in my arms_

_I just wanted to_

_Hold you in my arms_

"Starlight" - Muse

**EPOV**

I spent the entire night in the woods near Lillah's house. Just as I think it is safe for me to sneak away early on Monday morning, Lillah appears on her front porch. My first instinct was that there's a problem, but just as I am about to run to her to find out what's wrong, she starts stretching. Then she's off the porch and running toward the forest. I follow her, staying just off the path. She looks around a lot during her run, like she's looking for someone, but there isn't anyone else on this trail.

She drives me crazy as she runs; her tits bouncing up and down in time with her steps, her soft ass, her hips swaying back and forth, it's too much. I make sure Lillah is safely inside her house and run straight home. I don't want to leave her, but I know I can't do what I really want; go into her house, find her and make love to her all morning. Instead, I'm once again in my shower, the steam all around me as images of her running flash through my mind until I finally cum. Even as I call out her name, I know it's only temporary relief.

I dress slowly, dreading going into the shop. I'm so on edge; being horny as fuck, having no real relief, and being exhausted does not make for a good combination. I make it through the morning without an incident, mostly by burying myself in a piece of shit station wagon that saw better days fifteen years ago. But as soon as I stop for lunch, the guys start in on me.

Jared kicks it off, "How many girls did you 'see' over the weekend, Embry?"

"None of your damn business." I say through clenched teeth.

Quil, never one to miss an opportunity to be an ass jumps in, "What the fuck man? Go get yourself a piece, stat."

About the time I lift my arm, ready to punch Quil square in the jaw; Sam taps me on the shoulder. Stoically, he says, "We need to talk."

I follow Sam into his tiny office in the shop. He leans against the desk in the middle of the office, arms crossed over his chest. I don't say anything as I sit in the chair opposite him, I know before he speaks that he has figured out what is going on with me.

"Emily told me about her suspicions. I had the same ones. I haven't told Emily, but Embry, you have to tell me, honestly, did you imprint?"

Sam isn't my Alpha any more, but I respect him too much to lie to him. I nod once and look down, unable to handle his intense gaze.

Sam barks out a laugh and claps his hand on my shoulder, "Congratulations man! About time. I mean, I'm sorry, I know you never wanted to imprint. I know it sucks at first, but you know it isn't a death sentence. Once you work past all the shit, it's completely worth every moment."

"Sam, did we meet the same girl on Saturday? I can't be with Lillah. I don't know her. I definitely don't trust her. Yes, she's beautiful, and yes, I want her. But I can't be with her. She deserves so much more than me, it's just what she's accustomed to." I slump down further in the chair, letting my exhaustion get the better of me.

My eyes are closed as Sam begins speaking, but I can tell he's still laughing, "The trust will come as you get to know her. All of our women deserve better than the jerks we are. We all want to give them the world and feel they deserve to be treated like queens, but that doesn't mean material things, Embry. Emily is just as happy with a quiet dinner at home as getting dressed up for a night out."

I shrug, "Not to put down Emily, but she is a rare breed, Sam. She grew up like us. This Lillah, she has a big house in Forks and she's got a Master's degree. Why would she want to slum with me?"

"I don't know why any of these women want to _slum_ with us. Like I said, they all deserve better, but for some reason, they love us, faults and all. Having the house and degree doesn't mean she couldn't love you." Sam chuckles, "Maybe she likes man whores."

"Man whore? Really?"

I'm so on edge that one of Sam's regular jokes makes me want to jump out of the chair. Trying to calm myself down, I refocus the conversation, primarily to keeping this a secret, "Anyway, mind not telling Emily?"

"I'll try not to," Sam laughs loudly and walks out of the office.

He gives his parting shot when I hit the door, "Fighting it is worse, trust me, I know. That pull doesn't go away. The more you ignore it, the worse it gets. I think you are already feeling it.

"Go to her, give her a chance. So far, not one of these women have walked away from us. That has to say a lot for the accuracy of imprinting. She is your perfect match, just remember that."

-0-

On Tuesday morning, I'm back in the woods, covering Sam's morning patrol. I decided yesterday afternoon the best way to avoid the dreams would be to just avoid sleep all together. I called each of the guys asking if they would like for me to cover their patrols for them this week. Sam was happy for me to take his morning patrols so he could spend more time before work with Emily, Claire and Eli. Jacob willingly gave me his afternoon patrols so he could hang out more with Ness after she finished her lessons for the day. I usually patrol late at night, which means between my normal patrols, adding in Sam and Jake's patrols, and work, there are only a few hours that I can possibly sleep each night.

But even exhausted and needing those precious few hours of sleep last night, she invaded my dreams, almost immediately.

Images of Lillah from the multitude of dreams I had last night move through my mind as I pad through the woods. I see Lillah writhing beneath me, begging for more, screaming my name. Each time, just as I got close, just when I thought,_finally I'll have relief from this torture_; I would wake up, hard as a rock.

I've taken more showers in the past few days than I care to admit, not that the showers help. I don't even think dumping a bucket of ice directly on my groin could make this thing go away.

Of course, patrolling around Lillah's house hasn't helped. Since Sunday I've become very familiar with the woods around Forks. I know I don't have to watch her like this, but I _need_ to. I need to make sure she is safe.

As I watch from the edge of the woods, I can see Lillah is running again this morning, even after she ran twice yesterday. I hope she isn't trying to lose weight. Women and their bodies make no sense to me. She is perfect like she is, all curvy and soft. _I may need to talk to her about that._

Jared pops into my thoughts then. _Where the hell did he come from?_ Jared shows me that he's been around for the last twenty minutes or so. Then he proceeds to play back the images he's seen of Lillah from my mind. I growl at the thought of the other guys seeing her like I do.

I show him in my mind where I am, moving further along the trail to get ahead of Lillah. I phase back and pull on my jeans, waiting for Jared to show up. I can still hear Lillah running so I'm not concerned, but I want to get this over with quickly so I can get back to making sure she's safe. I hate that she runs alone out here. _Maybe I should offer to join her on her runs, and then in the shower after. _

Before I can dig deeper into _that_ thought, I hear Jared give the wolf call just a few yards away. I call back, signaling that it's safe.

Jared is talking before I even see him, "Dude, is that the chick Paul phased in front of last weekend? I've never seen you have a single thought about a woman. You've imprinted."

I don't say anything as he finally approaches. I can see he's laughing, which makes me want to tackle him. Before I can attack, he lifts his hands in surrender, "Hey, don't get pissed at me. You're the one that thought you could avoid imprinting."

"Seriously, this week just keeps getting shittier and shittier. Yesterday Sam, today you." I run my hands through my hair as I become more frustrated at the situation.

"And I didn't think I could avoid imprinting. I just didn't think it would ever happen. Actually, if you know of a way to stop it, share. I'd really like to go back, to like a week ago."

Jared starts laughing again, "Dude, you don't want to go back. Like it or not, she's yours. You can't stop it, and based on what I saw, you don't want to. I get it, you're pissed about this, but man, you have it bad for her. You're following her around like a little puppy.

"Man up and go get your woman."

I call after Jared as he's leaving, "I'm not acting like a little puppy, asshat! And don't tell anyone! That includes Kim!"

I can hear him still laughing as he calls out through the trees, "Fine then, you aren't a puppy. You're a pussy."

I quickly pull my jeans off and phase, intending to follow him and rip his throat out. Lucky for Jared, I can tell that Lillah is almost finished with her run, so I run to the edge of the forest to make sure she gets home safe. Jared flashes an image of him zipping his lips then flipping me off and calling me a pussy. I flash an image back at him: the last time we fought, me pinning his ass to the ground.

-0-

"EMBRY! What the fuck did you do to Rachel's car on Saturday?" Paul is stalking through the shop, already shaking with anger.

It's Wednesday and I haven't had more than an hour or two of sleep each night since Saturday. Paul picked the wrong day to start in on me. My anger is quick to surface, as I turn around to glare at him. I was just heading out to cover Jacob's afternoon patrol but kicking Paul's ass seems more appealing.

"Don't start with me, jackass. I did the same thing I always do to her car. What the fuck is going on and why the hell do you think it was me?"

Paul pauses at that. Looking at me questioningly, he holds up his cell phone, "Rachel just called, her car won't start."

"Well don't fucking blame me, I checked the alternator, battery, and ignition on Saturday, everything was fine. Is she sure she has gas in it?" Rachel is well known for forgetting to take care of things, like filling the gas tank.

Paul growls, "Yes there's fucking gas in the car, I filled it up last night. Grab your tool box, you were the last one to work on her car, you are fixing it."

"Yo, Sam, let Jacob know I'm going to be a little late covering his patrols, I'll take over once I'm done with Rachel's car." Sam nods in agreement, as I run out to my truck to grab my tool box before getting in Paul's truck.

We drive in silence through the thick fog. It's supposed to start raining soon, but nothing yet. Paul is driving faster through the fog than is probably safe, but I know he's worried about Rachel being stranded at the school by herself. I can't imagine what I would do if I knew Lillah was stranded somewhere. _Probably chew out whoever last worked on her car._

We pull up next to Rachel's car and Paul is out of the truck and grabbing Rachel in his arms before I can even pull my tool box out. I get the hood up just as Rachel walks up and gives me a quick hug.

"Thanks for coming, Embry. I don't know what is wrong with it. It started fine this morning."

"Sure thing, Rach."

I lean over the engine, seeing the issue right away. Someone has disconnected the battery.

I look up to ask Rachel what's going on when I see Lillah. It's like I'm back in my shower, the fog surrounds me just like the steam. As she slowly approaches through the fog I can make out more and more of her. I want to run to her, pull her in my arms, and make sure she is real, not just my imagination.

I reconnect the battery cable as she walks up, wiping my hands on my jeans, "Hi Lie-lah."

"It's Lil-lah, or Miss Hunter."

I'm suddenly hit with images of her with a whip, smacking my bare ass, telling me to call her Miss Hunter. I nearly double over as all the blood in my body suddenly rushes directly to my dick. _Fuck me. Mistress Lillah._ As prim and proper as she appears, I bet she has a dirty side. I don't think Mistress Lillah is such a far shot. But I don't want her to play with anyone but me._She's fucking__mine._

I need to get control of this situation, "I won't ever call you Ms. Hunter, so you can get off that high horse, Lie-lah."

Taking a step back, I'm finally able to take her all in. Her hair is tied back but some of it has escaped and is framing her face, the effect soft and very feminine. Her thin blouse isn't appropriate for the impending weather; I can see her nipples hardening as we speak. The little skirt she's wearing hugs her hips perfectly. As I follow her skirt over her hips and down her creamy thighs, I swallow hard when I see her shoes. _Oh my God. She's wearing fuck me heels._

God, I want to fuck her. I want to lean her over the hood of Rachel's car, push her skirt up, rip off any underwear she might have on and bury myself deep in her. I want those heels digging into my ass, as I go deeper and deeper. I want to lick, suck and bite her nipples, through her blouse until she can't take it anymore, until _I_ can't take it anymore.

I close my eyes, trying to regain control of my over-active imagination and my libido. I could cum, right here in the middle of the parking lot, from just my thoughts. I haven't even touched her and I'm about to explode, _which pisses me off_.

I growl at her, through clinched teeth, "What the hell are you wearing?"

I slowly open my eyes to see her frowning at me, like I hurt her feelings.

"You should go get in your car. I'd hate for the outfit _Daddy_ bought you to be ruined when it starts to rain."

I can tell this pisses her off. She crosses her arms over her chest and glares at me. _Good God she is sexy as hell when she's pissed_.

When she tells me she's been trying to figure out where she had heard my name I just roll my eyes. _Oooo, she's heard my name before, big deal, how is THAT going to hurt me?_ I shrug my shoulders, assuming Rachel has been talking about me.

She has a twinkle in her eyes now and I think I might be in trouble, but really, what could she have on me? And then she drops her bomb; she figured out my mom named me after a stupid _soap opera_ character.

I slam the hood of Rachel's car down, glaring over at Lillah. I want to kiss that smug look off her face. Instead, I slowly walk over to Rachel. I whisper low against her ear, so Paul and Lillah can't hear, "I don't know how you did it, but you set this up. I know someone disconnected that battery. Don't ever play matchmaker again Rachel, do you hear me? She's off limits. And never tell her another one of _my_ secrets again."

I turn to Paul quickly. "Take my tool box back to my truck. I have to go. Later."

I run for the woods near the school, phasing just as I hit the tree line, not even stopping to take off my clothes. My rage and desire for her is so intense that I can't stay there a moment longer.

-0-

Jacob knocks on the window of my truck, grinning wide and stepping back as I open the door. "Hey Jake. Ready to play wing man tonight?"

"Wing man? Sure sure, but I'm just here for the beer and wings. I'll look but I have no desire to touch."

Jacob slaps my shoulder as we head towards the bar I picked out. I've been here once or twice over the years, so I know what to expect with the women here.

"Assuming any woman in here would actually want to touch your ugly ass." I laugh, holding the door open for Jacob as he walks in.

Jacob barks in laughter at this as we head straight to the bar, putting in our order for two beers to start out and thirty wings.

"The women here can't be too picky, if they agree to be with you."

I smirk, finishing off my first beer in just a few gulps. I motion to the bartender for another before turning back to Jacob, "Please, women beg to be with me."

Jacob eyes me, "They can beg, but I hear you won't be paying attention to them anymore. Sam and Jared told me an interesting story this afternoon. We all know you imprinted."

"Fucking gossiping wolves. They are worse than old women." I mumble under my breath.

"You thought you could keep it a secret?"

"I had hoped. Besides, just because I imprinted doesn't mean I _have_ to be with her. It's not like we are married, I can date other women if I want." But I know already, I don't want other women, I just want _her._

I'm still pissed with myself for losing control this afternoon. Even if no one told Lillah about my name, the fact that she's been thinking about it, thinking about me, it's not right. Plus, I never expected her to fight back like that. No woman has ever fought back with me. _Fuck, I liked it_.

DAMNIT! She shouldn't have that much power over me, to get to me like that. After I lost control this afternoon I had planned on just going home. But I couldn't. I had to make sure she was ok. I ran all the way to La Push and then back to Forks, catching her just as she was starting her afternoon run. She was pissed too, I could tell. She was running faster, her feet pounding the ground harder.

When she got back home after her run, it was finally raining. I saw Lillah go room to room, slamming all the windows shut. I was just about to leave when I saw she hadn't closed the curtains in her bedroom. I watched, hating myself but hoping to see. Her hair was already free of its pony tail as she walked in to the bedroom. She had also pulled off her shirt and shorts. Lillah was standing there in just her sports bra and panties, playing with her stereo.

She started dancing around her room, singing along with "In My Head". _Fucking appropriate song. _Those hips that I dreamed of gripping as I entered her were swaying seductively to the rhythm of the music. When she turned around I could see the creamy skin of her back flaring out gently to her lush ass.

As she neared the end of the song she pulled her sports bra off. I could see, even from a distance that her nipples were puckered. Lillah looked down at her breasts, cupping them in her hands as she frowned, almost like she was puzzled by them. Then she rolled her nipples between her fingers, just like I did under her shirt the other night. She leaned her head back like she was enjoying it, then she stopped, quickly pulling her underwear off and heading towards the bathroom.

I couldn't stand it anymore. I ran straight home. After getting some short-lived relief, I called Jacob to see if he wanted to join me at the bar tonight.

The images of her squeezing her breasts, rolling her nipples, and her perfect ass swaying as she walked away are still haunting me. This is really why we are here now.

I only want her touching me, but I have to do something. I can't function like this. The only thing I can think of is to go find someone else. I used to do it all the time. I just need to find someone to help me scratch this massive itch I currently have.

I mumble under my breath, "I have to get relief from being so fucking horny all the time."

Jacob starts laughing, loudly. I really don't get what's so damn funny.

"What the hell are you laughing at?"

"You. Man, you don't know SHIT about being horny." Jacob finishes off his beer and waves for another one.

"Quil and I can tell you all about being horny, for years, with only our hands for relief."

I'm shocked by this, still processing Jacob's statement as a small group of women approach us. They are all attractive, but none as beautiful as Lillah. One blonde leans against Jacob, grinning, "What's the joke boys? We'd love to join in on your fun."

"Talk to my friend here," Jacob points to me, grinning at the blonde, "he's the one that needs some attention. He's having problems with his lady."

I growl under my breath, "She's not my lady."

This statement causes Jacob to laugh even louder. He turns to talk with the blonde and a brunette that had approached. I turn back to grab my beer, shaking my head at the idiot. _Yeah, like he's suffering right now._

I feel a hand rest against my shoulder just before I feel someone leaning in to me, whispering in my ear, "I'd be happy to help you with whatever problems you're having. No questions asked."

I sigh, not wanting to look at this woman. I don't want to do this. I want to push her away and say, "Thanks but no thanks."

Instead, I look over at the woman that has attached herself to me. She is the exact opposite of Lillah. She is obviously from one of the local Indian tribes; tall, copper skinned with long jet black hair. I nod slowly, looking over at Jacob, and then taking her hand. I walk directly to my truck, not saying a word to her. I don't ask her name, I don't care. I just want some mindless relief.

She giggles, "Slow down big guy, we've got plenty of time."

I push her against the truck and take her lips, my hands on either side of her head. Only my lips are touching hers but it feels so wrong. They aren't full and sweet tasting like Lillah's.

She moans and pulls me against her. I continue kissing her, hoping I can get past this. Her hands are running down my chest, under my t-shirt.

"God you are fucking ripped, big guy. And hot. Are you this hot just for me?"

I want to scream, "NO!" Instead I just grunt, letting this woman think what she will.

The woman breaks our kiss again, this time to kiss along my jaw to my ear. She nips at my earlobe. Normally I love for women to play with my ears. Not tonight.

Her hands are at the waist band of my jeans. She unbuttons my jeans and reaches in, whispering, "I can't wait to feel your rock hard cock. I know you want me baby."

Her hands on my cock are like a pin in a balloon; instant deflation.

I take a step back, not looking as she speaks, "What the fuck was that? You know what, never mind. No questions. I'm out of here. Good luck with your lady problems. Then again, I might need to say good luck to her. Pathetic."

I adjust my clothes and get in the truck. I lean my head against the steering wheel. I'm so exhausted all I can think about is sleep. I can't even feel embarrassed over what just happened. I should have known better. All I want, all I can think about, is Lillah.

There is a tap on my window. I almost drive off, thinking it is that woman back for more. But when I look up, I see Jacob laughing his ass off. I flip him off, which just makes him laugh harder.

He walks over and gets in the passenger side, still not composed, "Man, I could have told you that wasn't going to work. The look on her face when she came back in the bar, priceless!"

"Shut the fuck up, Jacob."

"Aww, Embry, you are breaking your poor Alpha's heart with those words." Jacob smirks then gets serious.

"Go home, drink yourself into a stupor. Give me a call in the morning. I'm supposed to have lunch with Ness. You and I can meet up somewhere before hand and talk."

I grumble under my breath, "Like I'll be able to sleep."

Jacob's smile is sympathetic, "The dreams aren't as bad if you stop fighting the imprint. Just being around her, actually around Lillah, not watching her from the woods like a stalker, can help. They don't ever go away completely; at least, they haven't for me. I expect once you fully accept her as your imprintee, they will, but spending time with her will take the edge off."

I nod once and Jacob opens the door to get out. "See you tomorrow man."

"Yeah, later. Thanks."

I sit there for a few minutes after Jacob exits the truck. I really don't get how spending time with her can help take the edge off the dreams. It would seem the more time I spend with her the more intense the dreams would be.

Thinking about the dreams makes me think of her again. I see her dancing around her bedroom like she did this afternoon. Only this time, I'm in her bed, watching her. She's giggling knowing that that it turns me on. She reaches for my hand and tugs me towards her bathroom. She wants me to join her in the shower.

I'm fucking hard, again. It went away at the other woman's touch, but just the thought of Lillah brings it back nearly instantly.

I can't stand it, I reach for my phone and text the number I saved on Sunday.

_I need you._

I hit send and toss the phone on the seat before taking off. Hopefully Jacob was right and the combination of alcohol and exhaustion can knock me out, at least for a few hours.

-0-

When I texted Jacob this morning, he suggested we meet at the deli. I prefer getting food at the diner across the street, but the deli is alright. I'm sitting in my truck waiting for Jacob. I don't have to wait long; my passenger side door opens just a few minutes after I cut the engine.

"You look like shit."

I grimace. I know what I look like; I looked in the mirror this morning. I still haven't slept and I decided this morning I wasn't in the mood to shave.

"Thanks Jake, way to be supportive. Your little trick of drinking didn't really help last night."

Jacob grins, "I am supportive, Embry, I'm here aren't I? And of course drinking didn't help. We don't get drunk. I just figured the alcohol would take the edge off. Obviously in your case it didn't work. Now tell me what's been going on."

I give Jacob a quick rundown of everything that has happened since Saturday.

When I pause, Jacob grin broadens even further, "Jared was right, you do have it bad for Lillah."

Jacob's face quickly turns from joking friend to Alpha, "You know you can't keep this a secret, you have to at least tell the other guys, and Leah. We need to have a meeting, tonight, to discuss."

I agree, knowing Jacob is right, the guys have already figured it out. It would be better to tell everyone, and swear them to secrecy, in one place. This one-by-one bullshit is getting old.

I exhale slowly, my mind racing. I remember something Jacob said last night that puzzled me, "You mentioned you and Quil, being constantly horny last night. How do you stand it?"

Jacob shrugs, looking serious, "Practice, I guess. It's a little easier for Quil right now just because Claire is still so young, it's not like he's 'attracted' to her in that way. He just wants to take care of her and make her happy."

"But Ness, she's getting older, quickly. You still haven't told her, have you?" I knew Jacob had agreed with Edward and Bella Cullen not to tell Ness about her being his imprintee until she was older. This way she could decide if that was what she wanted or not.

"No, Ness still doesn't know. Trust me, it isn't easy. We estimate she's about seventeen or so now. Every day is getting worse for me. I can see her starting to change how she looks at me. No longer like a child with her best friend. Now it's like she's realizing that I'm a man and she's a woman."

I shake my head, unable to imagine that kind of torment, "How do you do it then? I mean, you're always around her."

"It would be a hundred times worse if I wasn't around her all the time. I can tell you, it is much more tolerable if you can become a part of her life. Even if you are just the friend she needs right now that will help."

Jacob appears to be lost in thought, shaking his head like he's trying to clear his mind, he continues, "Like I said last night, the dreams will still be there. But they aren't as, _sexual_, if you have real life memories of her to dream about, to focus on."

Before I could respond, Jacob is jumping out of the truck. I assume Ness had arrived, so I get out and walk up to the sidewalk, standing next to Jacob. Ness had just come around the corner, grinning wide at Jacob, running straight into his open arms. Once Jacob finally sets her back on the ground she turns to me.

"Geez Embry, what happened? You look terrible."

Jacob laughs loudly at this and I hear him whisper in her ear, "Embry imprinted."

A low growl escapes my chest, "Shut up, Jacob. Does everyone have to know?"

Ness looks up at Jacob with sad eyes. When she turns back to me all traces of that sadness are gone, she's smiling wide.

"Who is she Embry? Anyone I know? May I guess?"

I shrug, turning back towards my truck, "You can guess, but you'll never figure it out. Enjoy your picnic you two."

I hear Ness giggle before she lands square on my back, "Tell me who she is or I'll bite you, Embry!"

"You wouldn't!" I laugh, running down the sidewalk with her on my back like she's twelve.

This makes her laugh even harder, "I don't want to, but to get the information I want, I will. Just ask Jake, I'm a biter."

"Is that so?" I ask while glancing at Jacob and smirking.

I have to bite my own tongue to keep from saying anything that might embarrass Ness. I need to remember to bring this subject up again later, when torturing Jacob.

I set her down gently on the sidewalk, giving her a quick hug, "Fine, her name is Lillah; she's a friend of Rachel's. Now go enjoy your picnic with Jacob. I've got to go get some work done. And don't tell anyone else!"

"Your secret is safe with me, Embry. You should bring her to the bonfire on Saturday! I want to meet the woman that stole your heart!" She waves, running back to Jacob.

I consider the idea of the bonfire on Saturday as I head to the shop. It isn't a bad idea, and, according to Jacob, the more time I spend with her, the less intense the dreams will be. And who knows, maybe it'll help with my anger too. I really dislike making her feel like I hate her.

-0-

Jacob texts me a short time later: _Dinner and meeting at Dad's, he's cooking, 7pm. Attendance is required. No imprintees._

The afternoon rushes by, of course. I don't want to go to this meeting, but since it is being called because of me, I really can't bail. I'm covering Jacob's patrols, staying in the forest until exactly six, giving me just enough time to run home, shower and change. I pull up to Billy's house right at seven.

I walk into the house, not surprised when I see I'm the last one to arrive. We start eating right away, digging into the pork chops and potatoes Billy prepared. There are a couple of small conversations going on, mostly talking about work, family, and preparations for the bonfire on Saturday.

Everyone is planning to attend, weather permitting, other than Seth, who will patrol during the bonfire, and Leah, who has to work. Sam even says that he and Emily are considering bringing Eli with them. Sue loves this idea, of course. She babysat Eli during our last few bonfires, so she is excited to get to join again.

Finally we all move to the living room. Billy starts us off, and then turns the meeting over to Jacob.

"Thanks everyone for coming on such short notice. We've had a couple of developments over the last week or so that you should all be made aware of."

Jacob proceeds to tell everyone about the events of last Saturday. No one seems surprised, I'm guessing because they've all heard by now, either while phased or just from one another. _Seriously, worse than old ladies._

As Jacob finishes, he turns to me, "Embry, you want to tell them the rest?"

I look up to see all eyes on me. I can't believe I am about to say this. I was so certain this would never happen. And yet, here I am. I look at Billy, who smiles, knowingly. How he knew, on Saturday, I will never know.

I keep my eyes focused on Billy as I speak, "I imprinted."

I only hear from the pack what comes next, as I squint my eyes closed.

"WHAT?"

"You have got to be shitting me!"

"No. Way. In. Hell."

"About damn time!"

Everyone starts talking over one another. It takes a few minutes for the group to calm down, all except Paul, who is cracking up. _Idiot._ When the rest of the room is finally quiet, he gasps out between fits of laughter, "WHO?"

I sigh, not wanting to say this part. Admitting to imprinting was one thing. Telling them who I imprinted on, something completely different.

"Lillah. I imprinted on Lillah. The woman that saw Paul phase. I carted her off to the beach because as soon as I saw her, I feared for her life. I was scared that Paul would get to her. So, to protect her, I took her away."

Everyone nods, as if they almost expected this. I take a deep breath before continuing, "I haven't told her. I don't plan on telling her. Please don't say anything to her and please don't share this outside of this room. The only reason I'm telling everyone here is because you would find out eventually. This way everyone knows. No more suspicion or guessing."

Jared seems a little surprised at this last statement, "You aren't going to accept her?"

"I don't see us having anything in common. She and I are from two totally different worlds. I think I'm going to attempt to befriend her. I might ask her to join us at the bonfire on Saturday, as my guest. Like I said, please, just don't say anything to her. And, if you could, help me to protect her and make sure she does not tell our secret."

The meeting breaks up soon after. A few people stopping to talk to me.

Quil, ever the smart ass, "Another one bites the dust. No more fucking around for you! Hope you enjoy blue balls."

"I knew you'd think she was hot! Way to go man!" Paul just laughs as he walks away.

Sue hugs me, "She is a very lovely girl. Don't assume it won't work out. Being from two different worlds isn't bad."

Seth punches my shoulder, "Damn! And here I was looking forward to going to the bars with you when I turn twenty-one in a few months."

I laugh at this, "We can still go to the bars, I just won't be picking up any women. I tried that already, it didn't turn out so well."

Jacob over hears our conversation and jumps in, "The player relegated to wing man."

"I really hate you most days, Jacob."

Sue crosses her arms and glares at the three of us, "Seth, you are not going bar hopping with Embry. I've heard the talk about him and you will not turn into a mini-Embry."

"I promise, Sue, no mini-Embry's." I laugh as I wave my arms in surrender towards Sue.

Sue looks over at me, a small grin crossing her face, "Hmm, I wonder. I bet Lillah would love to have a mini-Embry or a mini-Lillah."

The dream of Lillah pregnant the other day pops into my mind again. I shake my head to clear the image, "I somehow doubt that, Sue. I need to go anyway; I have patrols in a little while." I look down at my watch, surprised at how late it is.

Leah notices me checking my watch, "You heading out? I need to hit the bar for a few hours of work and then I'll meet up with you."

"Yeah, that's cool. I have a few things at home to take care of, I'll be out shortly."

Leah nods in acknowledgment. I've never been attracted to Leah, even though she is beautiful. I don't know if I would call Leah a friend, but that's about the best definition there is. We are a lot alike; neither of us has ever really fit in with the other guys. When we patrol, we respect each other's privacy, only communicating when needed.

"Embry," Leah calls out as I start to leave, "it's good to have a name to go with the face I keep seeing flash through your mind when we patrol." _Well shit._ I guess I don't have as good of control over my thoughts around Leah as I had hoped.

"Sorry about that Leah, I'll try to keep my thoughts to myself. Good night everyone. Thanks for dinner, Billy."

I wave to everyone as I head out. While I don't feel better after telling all of the wolves, at least now they know. No more looks and guesses. Hopefully they can all keep it a secret, because I have no plan to do anything more than be friends with Lillah. _And maybe fuck her senseless until neither one of us can move._

-0-

**A/N:** O_O So Embry's week was a little rough, but it sounds like he might be coming around to at least being nice to Lillah. You have a week now to prepare yourself, the next chapter is EPOV, he had too much to tell us, so he gets back-to-back chapters. Trust us, it's worth it.


	7. Chapter 7 Someone Like You

**Chapter 7 "Someone Like You"  
****  
Disclaimer:** Tara owns her own house, but that's about all we own, other than Lillah, Carter and Eli. We definitely do not own Twilight or SM's characters. We just like to play with them.

**A/N:** As mentioned at the end of Chapter 6, Chapter 7 is another Embry POV, because he had a little too much to tell us to put in just one chapter. As always, thanks to our AMAZING beta, Daily_i_Candy! She is a rock star if ever one existed!

_Someone like you and all you know and how you speak  
Countless lovers under cover of the street  
You know that I could use somebody  
You know that I could use somebody  
Someone like you  
_"Use Somebody" - Kings of Leon

**EPOV**

"Hey Sam, I finally have that station wagon running again."

Sam looks up from the truck he's working on, "Damn man, you are good. I thought there was no hope for that thing."

"It still needs a ton of body work done on it, plus the suspension is shot, but the engine is running. The engine wasn't in too bad of shape."

I look back over my shoulder at the car. The engine might be running, but everything around it is falling apart. I grimace as I look back at Sam, "I'd almost recommend scrapping the station wagon and putting the engine in a different car, maybe something you find at the junk yard. Anything has to be in better shape than that piece of shit."

"I don't disagree with you, but I have faith in Jacob's ability to work on the body." Sam grins, wiping his hands on a towel and leaning against the front of the truck, "Thanks for getting the engine going, you are our best engine guy for a reason. How about next week you tackle the suspension and transmission?"

"Yeah, I worked a little on the tranny to get the engine going, but it needs a lot more work done." Sam hands me the towel and I wipe the top layer of grease and oil off my hands before giving it back to him.

"Alright, time for me to go, I'm covering Jacob's patrols."

Sam looks surprised by this, "Man, have you slept at all this week?"

"No, not really." I shrug, not wanting to go into the details of the dreams that haunt me every time I close my eyes.

Sam crosses his arms, clearly upset with this situation, "In that case, you are done covering my patrols. Thanks, but I'd rather you sleep than give me a little time with my family."

"I'm fine, Sam."

"No, you aren't. You look like shit. Have you talked to Lillah yet?"

Sam is staring at me. It's weird how I'm suddenly hit by the similarity between Sam and his son, Eli. Eli is well known for his staring ability. Sam hasn't blinked and is not breaking eye contact with me.

I snicker, mumbling under my breath; "Now I see where Eli gets his talent from."

Sam's brows furrow, but still he doesn't blink, "What are you talking about?"

"Nothing," I say with a chuckle.

Sighing, I answer his original question, "No, I haven't talked to Lillah yet. I was going to go see her tomorrow."

"Fine, but you need to talk to her soon; the dreams aren't going to stop until you get closer with her."

"You know that's fucked up, right? That spending more time with her will make the dreams go away."

Sam laughs, turning his back to me, "It's not fucked up. It's a way to push us to be with our imprintees. I guess you aren't the only stubborn wolf to ever exist. I only have the dreams when Emily and I are apart. Definitely makes me want to never be away from her."

I smirk, turning to go wash up before I head out to patrol for Jacob. Before I can walk more than a few steps away though, Sam calls over his shoulder, "Oh, and Embry?" I turn to look back at him as he continues, "This is your last patrol for Jake too. I'll talk to him. You need to rest, even if that rest is disturbed by dreams."

I shake my head as I walk away, knowing I can't argue with Sam when he makes a decision. I'm sure he means well, but it won't do any good for me to rest, the dreams won't let me.

Just as I'm drying my hands, Paul turns the corner, grinning wide. "Hey jackass! What are you doing tonight?"

"Nothing. What's up with you? You didn't just fuck Rachel in the shop did you?"

"Nah man, she's at school still. Just excited for her, tonight's the first home game for Forks High School. It'll be the cheerleaders first game, the school doesn't have money for them to travel to away games."

Somehow, Paul's grin gets even wider as he continues. If I didn't know better, I'd suspect he was up to no good.

"You want to come support Rachel? Kim will be there."

I shake my head, smiling at Paul, "Damn dude, you are wrapped up in her. But sure, I'll be there."

"You're just jealous. Besides, you can't talk; Jared told me you've been stalking Lillah when she runs. That's kind of creepy man."

I punch Paul in the shoulder, "Shut the fuck up. What's the plan for tonight?"

"Pick me up here at the shop around seven, we'll head over to the game from here, if you're cool driving."

"Yeah, whatever. I've got to go patrol now, see you at seven."

Paul laughs as I walk away, "Later."

-0-

Seth is flashing image after image in my mind as we patrol. As much as taking on the extra patrols this week has helped to avoid the dreams, I'm close to wanting to cause bodily harm to both Jared and Seth.

I am spoiled by patrolling with Leah. Our understanding to leave each other alone means we both patrol in relative peace and quiet. But not so with Jared and Seth, especially Seth. He's a good kid, but he never seems to stop 'talking'.

Needing a break, I flash an image of Lillah's house to Seth. I can tell Seth is laughing, but he runs off towards the beach as I head towards Forks.

Unlike the past few days, when I arrive at Lillah's house, she isn't running. Softly padding around the back of her house, I see all the curtains are still drawn. I walk over to the side where her bedroom curtains are still open slightly, like they were on Wednesday. Looking in, I see clothes thrown all over the room, but no sign of Lillah.

Then as I'm watching, I see her walk out of the bathroom, a towel around her body and her hair pulled up. She's running around the room, opening drawers and tossing things onto the bed. She dashes over to what I assume is her closet, pulling clothes out and tossing them on the bed.

Picking up all the clothes on the bed, Lillah runs into her bathroom again. A few moments later she runs out of the bathroom wearing matching pale pink bra and panties. Knowing I will get myself in trouble if I stick around any longer, I turn my back, dashing off into the woods.

-0-

Once I'm done with patrols, I run home to shower and change. Images of Lillah running around her room this afternoon fill my mind and it doesn't take much to push me over the edge. I don't bother looking in the mirror as I get dressed, I know how shitty I look, and I really don't care. _It's not like I'm going to see Lillah tonight._ I plan to clean myself up tomorrow before I go see her.

It doesn't take me long to drive to the shop, as I pull up right at seven. Paul is still grinning like a fool as he runs over.

"Why didn't you shave?" Paul starts in on me as soon as he climbs in my truck.

"Hey, I don't have to drive you anywhere. I'm going to support Rachel. I'm being nice giving your sorry ass a lift. You don't like how I look, phase and run to the school. Or drive yourself. It won't kill you if you and Rachel have two cars there."

Paul grumbles as I take off, "No need to bite my head off. What the hell is your problem?"

Shaking my head, I pull on to the main road to Forks, "Sorry man. I'm just fucking exhausted. This week has worn me out. Promise, I'll be nice tonight and support Rachel."

"Hey, you're the idiot that took on extra patrols. You trying to make the rest of us look bad?"

"Doesn't take much to make you slackers look bad."

Paul punches my shoulder, "Shut up jackass. Besides, you're the one that wasn't at work yesterday morning? Where were you anyway? Banging your new imprintee?"

I really want to punch Paul square in the jaw, but since I'm driving, it's not my best plan, "Jacob wanted to see me yesterday morning, Alpha's orders and all, you know."

Paul nods in understanding, "So you weren't banging Lillah? A shame, I bet she is fucking wild in bed."

"Paul," I growl out, doing my best not to lose my temper, "I fucking told you, I'm not going to accept her. We are too different. At most we can be friends."

Paul doesn't say anything as I pull into the school parking lot. I don't look at him, trying to calm myself down. I could kill Paul for talking about Lillah that way. I know he doesn't mean anything by it, I know all he can think about is Rachel, but I still don't like it. _She's mine._

And then that annoying voice of reason pops in my head- _She's not yours if you don't ever accept her. If you don't accept her, some other man will get to touch her._Trying to clear my mind, I rub my hands over my face; Paul still hasn't responded. As I wait for him to process what I just said, I realize just how out of control my facial hair has gotten. _Damn, two days of not shaving and I've got some serious stubble going on._ I definitely need to shave before I kiss Lillah again, her pale skin against this would not be a good thing. Assuming she ever lets me kiss her again.

I finally turn to look at Paul. It becomes clear to me quickly the reason why he hasn't said anything is because he's shaking, _with laughter_, "Don't laugh, asshole!"

That just makes it worse; Paul doubles over in my truck, holding his sides as he laughs. He can't even speak he's laughing so hard. Finally he takes a gulp of air, "You. Are. An. Idiot!"

I'm pissed. I can't take it anymore. I get out of the truck, slamming my door as I exit. Opening the umbrella I rarely use, I start walking towards the football field.

Paul catches up with me when I'm half way across the parking lot, carrying his own umbrella, "Sorry man, but you have to admit, that is fucking funny."

"I don't have to admit anything. It isn't funny, it's hell. There's no way I can ever make it work with Lillah. I'm fucked! Only thing I can figure out is to be friends with her but not accept her."

Paul starts laughing again, "You won't make it a week. Unless you can convince her to be friends with benefits. Seriously, the desire for her will never go away. It's just going to get worse."

I stop walking, confused by what Paul's saying compared to what Jacob told me. "What do you mean the desire won't go away? Jacob said being friends helps him, makes the dreams not as powerful."

"Jacob is right; being friends will help make the dreams less powerful. But, Jacob is dealing with a teenager. Ness is still in that stage where she isn't truly a woman, so the desire is there, but it's not fully developed. But you, you are dealing with a _woman. _She has wants, needs, dreams, and desires. That means, as her wolf, you are pulled to satisfy _all_ of those."

I run my hand through my hair, getting more frustrated. The more I learn about imprinting, the less I like it. The idea of friends was just becoming acceptable to me.

"Based on how shitty you've looked this week, I'm guessing she has some pretty wicked desires too. The dreams happen when you are apart, but they are based on what is going on with both of you. Right now, I'm guessing you're both fighting the pull pretty damn hard, which is why your dreams are so intense and real. You're not only being pulled to her, but you're getting a sense of how much she wants you." Paul pushes me to get me moving again, laughing.

I move forward, not aware of where we are going. It's too much information for me to take in. I can't say anything as I consider everything Paul has told me. _I'm so fucked._

The more I think about it, the more it sounds like the idea of friends with benefits might be my only choice. I'm not opposed to sleeping with Lillah, but I know from my dreams, it wouldn't be just sleeping with Lillah. As scary as it is, I know I'm already emotionally involved, whether I want to admit it or not. And based on what Paul just said, it sounds like Lillah might reciprocate those feelings, not that she'd admit it.

Paul elbows me to get my attention. I was so lost in thought; I didn't realize we had approached the ticket booth. I quickly hand over a few dollars for admission, following Paul towards the home team's side of the field. The game just started, so we head up into the stands. We wave when we spot Kim, who has saved seats for us. It's crowded, which is surprising given the steady rain.

"Hey Kim! I can't believe that loser husband of yours let you hang out with two studs like Paul and I tonight. How's the clinic doing?"

Kim hugs both Paul and I as we approach, "You hush Embry, Jared is not a loser. He's covering for Quil on patrols tonight. Quil is watching Claire and Eli while Sam and Emily have a 'date night'. Jared's going to meet me once the game is over."

"And the clinic is going great! The doctor really gives me a lot of freedom, which is unheard of for a second year Physician's Assistant. I'm so lucky!" Kim is grinning wide, her excitement evident.

I turn my back on Paul, who is searching the crowd down below for Rachel. I can't help but smile at Kim's excitement.

"That's amazing Kim. Though why you didn't just decide to be a doctor I'll never understand. You are so smart; you would have made a fantastic doctor."

"You obviously have blocked out the year I was gone to P.A. school. It was bad enough for Jared and me to be separated for a year. I can't imagine how it would have been if I hadn't accelerated my class schedule to condense into one year, let alone if I had gone to medical school, then residency. I think you guys would have killed him!"

Kim giggles, her eyes sparkling with mischief, "So, Embry, any secrets you want to share with me? Maybe about imprinting a certain red-head?"

I smirk at Kim, "Nope, nothing to share."

"Fine, don't tell me, Embry." Kim grins slyly at me, "I can recognize the signs, and right now, she is showing classic signs of an imprintee."

"What signs of an imprintee? What do you mean 'right now'?"

Instead of responding to me, Kim just giggles some more. Paul elbows me then, but he's not looking at me, he's waving frantically to Rachel, who has popped her head out from under the stands to look around. Lillah is standing next to her, her arms crossed.

I whisper to Paul, "You didn't tell me Lillah coached cheerleading with Rachel!"

"Uh, at the time, it wasn't a big deal. Sorry, I've been a little distracted by your news to mention it." Paul winks at me then continues to wave at Rachel.

I elbow Paul in the ribs, whispering so Kim can't hear me, "You are fucking worse than Rachel!"

"I'm not worse than Rachel, it was her idea." He whispers back, "I just conveniently forgot to tell you that Lillah is Rachel's co-coach of the cheerleading squad. I would have mentioned it, but I figured you wouldn't come then. You're a stubborn ass."

I want to attack Paul, but I know he's right, I would have avoided coming out here tonight had I known Lillah would be here. My anger at Paul subsides as I turn my attention to Lillah. Her eyes are on Kim, so I take a moment to examine her. How is it she looks so amazing in a water-resistant hoodie and track pants? It hugs her in all the right places.

Kim grabs my attention again, "Embry, you are so clueless. The signs of possession. She saw you and me talking and, even though she knows I'm not a threat, she is ready to strike."

Then Lillah is looking at me. She's blushing, but not like she is embarrassed. No, this blush is redder, almost like she's pissed, like she's ready to kill someone. But she was just eying Kim why would that piss her off? Unless Kim is right. _Could she really feel it too?_

I raise my eyebrow in confusion, but before I can investigate any more, Lillah looks down, breaking our eye contact.

I wish she wouldn't look away like that. After everything I've been told this week, I really do want to try to get past my anger at everything that has happened. It really isn't her fault and I need to remember that. She hasn't done anything wrong.

Besides, I would like to get some sleep eventually. According to Jacob, this means, at the very least, becoming Lillah's friend. _And hopefully friends with benefits to deal with the desire Paul mentioned._

Lillah looks up at me again, but this time, after a brief second, she smiles. It's tentative and shy, but it's a smile. And it's beautiful. I'm suddenly hit with the urge to do everything I can to make her smile all the time. Before I can return the smile, Rachel wraps her arm through Lillah's to grab her attention.

A few minutes later, Rachel is in the stands, hanging all over Paul. I ignore them, continuing to keep an eye on Lillah. As she's showing one of the cheerleaders a move, I hear a few of the football players on the sidelines talking. It takes everything in me not to go down to the field and beat the hell out of each and every one of them.

_"Check out Ms. Hunter. Damn she's fine."_

_"No kidding man, I'd kill to see her in one of those cheerleading uniforms. Her tits would be squeezing out the top and her fine ass peaking out the bottom."_

_"Oh damn dude! Why'd you have to say that? I've got a fucking hard on now! You know she'd be wild in bed. I bet she's a screamer."_

_"I bet she likes it rough. Whip me, chain me, make me beg! It's always the quiet ones that are the freakiest."_

I stand up at this last comment, ready to strike, to go after each and every one of them. All I can think of is attacking them for even looking at Lillah. _Damnit, she's mine._

Before I can move from the stands, Paul grabs my shoulders and pushes me back down to the bench. No longer sitting, Paul is hovering over me, whispering, "Embry! Embry! Calm the fuck down man! You can't do this here. Embry! Come on man. Focus."

Paul is shaking me when I finally calm down enough to realize what's going on. I'm breathing deeply, fighting the urges of the wolf, the need to attack them. Rachel has left, and is back down under the stands with Lillah, I assume.

I look over at Paul and he finally exhales, "You good now man? What the hell?"

I speak through clenched teeth, still wanting to go down to the field to kick their asses, "Those, punk-ass teenagers, football players, were talking about _my_ Lillah."

Paul looks at me for another minute then starts laughing again, "Damn, you did imprint, didn't you?"

"What?" This comment surprises me.

Of course I imprinted, I told him that yesterday.

Kim comes back then, holding a hot chocolate in her hands, smiling softly at me. I try to return the smile, my anger subsiding now. I look back at Paul expectantly.

Paul smirks, "Man, I finally see how wild I look when I lose it. Seriously, I thought you were going to phase and attack the entire Forks High football team."

"Not the entire football team. Just the offensive line." I try to smile at the small joke.

Paul just rolls his eyes, "Lame, but good to have you back. Rachel wants to have a celebratory dinner after the game, you interested? Kim can't join, Jared gets off patrols soon."

"Yeah, that sounds good. The diner?" Paul nods and we both return our attention to the game, neither of us talking any more about my near-phasing incident.

Throughout the last half of the game a plan starts to take shape in my mind. I don't know how Lillah will react, but, based on that small smile, I'm willing to try. I don't have anything to lose. Plus, I need to try something; the way I've handled things so far hasn't worked.

My plan revolves around two things; asking her to join me at the bonfire tomorrow and talking to her about the possibility of becoming friends. Of course, all I can think about is kissing her again. I'm hopeful that if she is open to friends, she might also be open to friends with benefits. That is going to be a little trickier. I might just have to wait to propose that situation.

I look up at the scoreboard, realizing there are just a few minutes left in the game. If I don't go to Lillah now I may not have the opportunity again.

"Hey, I'll be right back."

I stand up to leave, but Paul grabs my arm, "Where the hell are you going?"

I look over at Kim and grin, "Hot chocolate, I need something to sweeten my disposition."

Paul rolls his eyes and lets go of my arm.

"I'll be right back. Kim, don't leave, I'll walk you to your car after the game," I call back as I run down the steps.

I run across the track to the little over hang where Lillah and Rachel are huddled together. I don't say anything to Rachel, just walk up to Lillah, wrap her hand in mine and whisper, "Come with me?"

She gasps, loudly, but doesn't argue. I want to pick her up and run to my truck, but I know that isn't a good idea. Instead, I try to walk at a 'normal' pace for Lillah to keep up with me. The crude football players watch as we walk by them and I smirk to myself. _Yeah, _boys _she's mine. _I walk past the steps I just came down heading underneath the stands. As we walk, my plan to talk flies out the window. Feeling her hand in mine, her skin against mine, and her smell surrounding me is too much temptation for me. _God I want it all. _

I stop once we are near the middle of the stands, in the darkest spot possible, the sounds of the game is muffled. As I turn her to face me, I can see the faint outline of her nipples through her hoodie. I open my mouth to talk, but I don't.

Instead, I gently push her against one of the support beams, letting go of her hand as I push the hoodie down so I can see all of her face. She's shaking a little, I'm hoping from the cold and not because she's scared. I lean forward, my thumbs brushing over her cheeks as I cup her face in my hands.

Just as my lips are about to touch hers, I smile softly, "Just to make sure, you do know you are awake, right?"

Lillah's eyes go wide and she blushes in embarrassment, but she nods once, her eyes looking at my lips. That's all the invitation I need.

I take her lips against mine, more roughly than I intended, my need for her so urgent I can't remain gentle like I want to. She gasps once, tensing slightly, then relaxes into me. I feel and hear her sigh when I lean further into her, pressing my chest against hers. It doesn't take long before her hands are moving across my face, her fingers scratching along my stubble, then up into my hair. I take a step forward, pinning her between the support beam and my body. The feel of her lush body against mine urges me on further.

I run my tongue along her bottom lip, distracting her with my mouth as my hands find the bottom edge of her jacket. I need to feel her satiny skin. She opens her mouth to me just as my fingers slide beneath her jacket. I slide my hands across her stomach, relishing in the feel of her silky skin against my work roughened fingers. I want to take her home so I can see and feel all of her, but for now, I'm enjoying just this.

My fingers find the edge of the pale pink bra I saw her in earlier. I'm eager to feel her lush breasts in my hands again, even if it's though the thin fabric of her bra. Lillah moans and pushes her breasts against my hands when my thumbs brush across her pert nipples. I want to reach behind her and unhook her bra, but I know I won't be able to stop if I do. Even now, I know I've gone too far for where we are, but that doesn't mean I don't want more.

Surprisingly, Lillah is starting to explore too, her hands sliding down my neck, over my shoulders, then down my chest and my stomach. I growl, increasing the pressure against her lips when I feel her cool fingers move under my shirt. Her fingers draw small circles over my abs, mimicking the movements of my fingers against her nipples.

I know we have to stop, I can hear the crowd cheering as the clock winds down, but I need to feel more of her. Touch her everywhere. I let my hands move from her breasts around to her back. I'm able to resist the urge to unhook her bra. Instead, my hands slide down her back. I can't stop myself, my hands pushing past the elastic of her pants. I stop just above her hips, feeling the satin of the panties I saw her in earlier. I want to squeeze her ass, but I don't. Instead, I pull her flush against me.

Lillah whimpers when I break our kiss. But that whimper changes to a contented sigh when I move to her neck.

Nuzzling under her ear I whisper, "Do you feel what you do to me?"

Lillah nods, moaning softly when I suck her earlobe into my mouth. But still I don't stop, licking along the outside of her ear, whispering, "It's not just me. You drive those teenage boys you teach wild. Sheer tops that show off your tits, tight skirts that show off your beautiful curves, and fuck me heels."

"I...I don't - oh God, please - they don't...you aren't..." She stammers out.

I grin, knowing she can't really focus right now, because of what _I'm_ doing to her.

I kiss back across her cheek, hearing the crowd counting down the seconds. My kiss is gentler this time, her soft lips begging for more. As much as I want more, I take a step back.

We groan at the loss of contact, and I can't help but to smile at her, completely agreeing with the sentiment, "I know, but I need to get you back to Rachel, or she'll hunt me down."

I pull her hoodie back up, and then grab her hand again, lifting it to my mouth like I wanted to last week. I kiss the back of her hand, grinning. She smiles shyly then takes my hand.

We walk out, just as the buzzer for the end of the game goes off. Before we walk back around the corner, I lean down and whisper, "I'm sorry for how I acted the other day. I'd like to try to be friends, if you are open to it. How would you feel about joining me at the bonfire on the Reservation tomorrow?"

"Friends?" Her eyes go wide. I can see she's considering this idea, but there is a hint of something else. "Uh, okay. I guess, I mean, yeah, we could try to be friends. Does that mean no more of, uh, whatever just happened?"

"If that is your terms of friendship, then yes, no more of that."

I frown at this thought, especially after what Paul said earlier. Taking a chance, I add on, "But I wouldn't mind continuing, if you wouldn't."

She blushes wildly, which really says something since her chin and cheeks are already pink from my stubble. _Damn, should have shaved_.

Finally, she looks up at me, "Okay, friends. I'd like to come to the bonfire, if you're sure it's ok. And we'll just play it by ear with the, uh, other stuff?"

I nod, still holding on to her hand and walking back towards the field. Rachel's eyes all but come out of her head when she sees us walking together, holding hands. I'm sure we are quite the sight. Thankfully Lillah's hoodie helps to hide most of the pink across her face. But I am sure we look like a couple of horny teenagers who just got caught by their parents.

Thinking of horny teenagers reminds me of the punk-ass football players. I look up to see the small group of guys staring open-mouthed. As she walks slowly up to Rachel, I mouth to the boys, "MINE," as I flip them off with my free hand. They trip over each other in their haste to return to the locker room. I grin with satisfaction at myself.

I kiss Lillah's hand one more time, telling her I'll see her tomorrow on the beach at sunset. Then I run up the stairs to where Kim is still waiting for me. She is grinning from ear-to-ear, having seen Lillah and I come out from under the stands.

She winks, "I think it was Lillah who just got some hot chocolate, not you, Embry!"

"That is a terrible joke, Kim, and nothing happened. Now come on, let's get you to your car so you can spend some quality time with your man." I grin at her, helping her down the steps so she doesn't slip on the wet metal.

-0-

**A/N: **So there you have it! Finally, Embry made a decent decision when it comes to Lillah. Lillah was a little hacked at us for giving Embry 2 chapters so fair warning, there are 2 weeks of Lillah to come. Trust us, you won't want to miss those 2 weeks. Well. Worth. It.


	8. Chapter 8 Taking Chances

**Chapter 8 "Taking Chances"**

**Disclaimer:** Let's be honest, at this point, you understand that we don't own much, other than Lillah, Carter and Eli. We definitely do not own Twilight or SM's characters. Get it? Got it? Good.

_But what do you say to taking chances,  
What do you say to jumping off the edge?  
Never knowing if there's solid ground below  
Or hand to hold, or hell to pay,  
What do you say,  
What do you say?_

"Taking Chances" - Celine Dion

**LPOV**

The football game is over. I have no idea whether we won or lost. I don't even remember what the score was before-

My face is already so red I don't think I can blush any more, but I feel the heat increasing in my cheeks as I recall the look in Embry's eyes when he approached me just a few short minutes ago. His brown eyes were full of lust and hunger. I had never seen a man look like that, look at _me_ like that, at least, not while we were both awake. It was like the Embry of my dreams had come to life.

I walk on nimble legs, thankful for Embry's firm grip on my hand. I'm pretty sure that's the only thing moving me forward and keeping me steady on my feet. I continue to look down at the ground as we approach Rachel. Between my blushing and us holding hands as we walk out from under the stands, I'm sure it's obvious what we've been up to.

We are nearly to Rachel when I realize the last few minutes of my life are a complete blur. I know Rachel will hound me for details, so I'm trying to come up with something to tell her, but I'm drawing a complete blank. One touch of Embry's lips against mine and I was in full sensory overload. I can't think when he kisses me, I can only react. The only thing I can focus on is my overwhelming need for _more_ of him.

I can't remember a single detail but I know it was, by far, the most intense kiss of my life. _Not that I have a ton of other kisses to compare to._ I can't decide if that's pathetic or exciting. I want, I _need_ more of him.

Embry kissing my hand causes my stomach to do another round of somersaults. I look up at him and realize we have reached Rachel and we have stopped walking. My stomach abruptly changes from somersaults to dropping, because I know now that he's returned me to Rachel, he's going to leave me again. I'm so afraid that even though I know this wasn't a dream, it was a fluke. I'm scared the next time I see him he won't be my dream Embry, my Wolf Charming, he'll be Mr. Cranky Pants again.

I sigh, leaning into him when he pulls my hoodie back slightly to whisper against my ear, "I'll see you tomorrow. Meet me at the beach at sunset."

Before I can respond, he's running up the stairs of the stands to Kim, who is grinning at him. I remind myself again that Kim is Jared's imprintee and wife. There is no reason for me to be jealous of her, except Embry seems to be relaxed enough around her to joke and laugh.

Rachel waits until Embry and Kim walk out of sight, and then she grabs my arm, spinning me around to face her. When I finally look at her she pushes my hood back just slightly. The look on her face says it all. It's definitely obvious what we were doing. Before she can question me a few staff members wander over to say hi. Rachel quickly pulls my hood forward before turning to converse with them. Just in case, I step slightly behind Rachel and keep my gaze locked on the ground. I surely don't want them seeing my face, especially since I can feel the sting on my sensitive cheeks from his rough beard, and the burn on my fair skin from my crimson blush.

After we say our goodbyes to our co-workers, Rachel and I help the girls gather their equipment. No one speaks as we work, least of all me, but I can feel the glances that are cast my way. I really hope these girls don't know what I've been doing under those stands. I'm supposed to be the responsible adult here.

I shake my head when a flash of Embry nuzzling just below my ear passes through my head. I peek at Rachel and she smirks at me, puckering her lips and giggling. If she weren't my friend, I would be so mad at her.

I can tell by the look on her face that she is dying to question me. Thank goodness the girls are around and she can't start with the grand inquisition now. I'm sure that she's impatiently waiting until she can attack me. I'm starting to think maybe I shouldn't have agreed to dinner with her and Paul. I gave in to her pleading earlier, but that was before- _Embry_.

-0-

Rachel and I wave to the last of our girls as they run off to their cars. I'm starting to wonder about this 'celebratory dinner'. It's not like I don't love spending time with Rachel and having the opportunity to get to know Paul better, but I know she'll question me about Embry too. It's probably her main reason for asking me in the first place.

I suck it up and plaster a fake smile on my face. Rachel and I run across the parking lot towards Paul. He's leaning against Rachel's car, waiting patiently as the rain falls steadily on him.

"Hey, Lillah, how's it going?"

I tug my hood just a little further forward, just in case, "I'm good, Paul. How are you?"

"Starved," he winks at me and pulls Rachel into him, "You ready, babe?"

Rachel nods and we don't waste time deciding on a destination. We agree to meet at the diner because it's closest and they are open late. I leave Paul and Rachel to climb into my car, waving at them as they pull out of the lot too.

On the short drive to the diner I work to calm myself down. I'm trying to ignore that my lips are still tingling where they touched Embry's. My mind flashes back to Sunday and I realize this must have been the "next kiss" that he warned me about. I roll my eyes at myself. I can't believe I made out with him under the bleachers. It's like I'm still in high school, which I am, sort of.

Every time I think I've calmed down, I feel his hands all over me again, his lips moving across mine, his very obvious erection against my stomach. The words he whispered to me are finally sinking in as well. He was talking about how I drive teenage boys wild and 'fuck me' heels. _Maybe he didn't hate that outfit the other day after all._ My head is spinning all over again. All because of Embry; his gruff voice, his gentle hands and sweet lips.

To think that he might possibly be attracted to me is another thing altogether. I'm scared to explore it or to question it, but now extremely curious. I don't know what made him change his mind about me, though I'm definitely pleased. I hope we are really able to become friends. If the other 'stuff' happens, then that's a bonus. _A VERY nice bonus._

I cringe and shake my head as I pull up in front of the diner. I really need to get my mind off of this man. I can't go in there with a stupid smile on my face or Rachel will know I have feelings for a man I just made out with under the stands at a high school football game. I didn't even do that with Carter when he was a football player and I was a cheerleader in high school.

I turn off my car then grab my purse and cell phone, clutching both to my chest as I jump out into the rain. Normally I wouldn't mind the rain so much. But instead of being out and about, I'd love to be at home, cuddled up in bed with a book and a cup of hot tea. _Soon enough_.

When I step inside Rachel waves at me from our usual table. She looks like a kid in a candy store, bouncing on her seat as I walk over. I can tell by the look on her face that she's ready to do battle. _Oh shit_.

"Sit down," Rachel points at the opposite side of booth.

"Where's Paul? Did you guys order yet?"

"Eh, he's in the restroom," Rachel leans forward and slaps the table.

"What the hell happened with you and Embry? Did you make out under the bleachers?" She snickers and whispers quietly, "You dirty whore."

My mouth drops open at the last statement, "Rach...I don't even know what to say to that! We didn't 'make out'."

I shake my head, pausing before I continue, "Okay, maybe we kind of made out."

My voice drops on the last part because I don't want to hear Rachel's inevitable 'told you so'.

"Ah HA! I knew something had happened. Give me details," Rachel turns and glances over her shoulder, checking for signs of Paul, "And hurry it up, please."

"There's nothing big to tell," I feel my face heat with an intense blush.

The word 'big' triggers the memory of Embry pressing me against his growing erection. I definitely wasn't expecting to feel _that_ from just a kiss.

"Lill, come on, please tell me?"

"Fine," I cross my arms and lean back against the seat, "He kissed me," I tell her and leave it at that.

I have to stifle the giggle that almost escapes when I see that Rachel is grinding her teeth.

"That's... _it_?"

"Well," I sit up straight and place my hands over my face, "No. He um, kind of slipped his hands under my shirt," I sigh and peek through my fingers when I hear her start to chuckle.

"Then I put my hands under his shirt. He has these yummy abs..."

"Mmm I know about yummy abs," Rachel grins at me and I uncover the rest of my face.

"Don't be embarrassed, Lillah. It's a natural reaction to your- to someone that you are attracted to."

"Yeah, I guess. It's just so out of character for me to-" I glance up and smile hesitantly when I see Paul coming out of the restroom.

When Rachel notices why I've stopped speaking she frowns at Paul and mutters under her breath. Paul laughs when he hears her but doesn't say anything. Instead, he sits and stretches his legs out, invading half of Rachel's space. I grin and shake my head when Rachel rolls her eyes and punches him lightly in the arm.

"Scoot over, Paul! You big lug!"

Heidi, one of the regular waitresses comes walking over. She isn't my biggest fan so she doesn't really linger too long. Rachel places her order then I sit staring at Paul as he orders a massive amount of food, my mouth hanging open as he continues to order. I never knew someone could eat so much in one _day_, never mind one meal. Rachel catches my look of surprise and laughs.

"Every meal, he eats that much. It's a wonder he's not five hundred pounds."

My eyes grow even wider when she tells me this. I don't even know what to say. Seeming completely unphased by Paul's order, Heidi turns to me expectantly.

"Oh, um, I'll just have decaf coffee. I had dinner earlier." She frowns at me before turning to walk away to put our orders in.

We sit in silence for a few seconds. I know Rachel is probably dying now that Paul is here and she can't say anything about my fun under the stands.

She clears her throat and I glance at her. She's looking over my shoulder, alerting me that someone is there. I turn my head just slightly and I see Embry, hands stuffed in his pockets, watching us closely. _Awkward_.

"Dude, about time you got here. What took you so long?" Paul's booming voice echoes in the near empty diner.

"Um, I told you I was going to walk Kim to her car. I waited with her until Jared showed up," Embry looks at Paul oddly.

"Oh right, yeah I remember."

"Have a seat!" Rachel sounds overly excited and gestures to the space next to me. _Crap_.

Embry shuffles his feet a little bit, pointing over his shoulder towards the main counter, "I'm going to go order so that Heidi doesn't have to walk back over here. She was limping when I came in."

I watch as he jogs over to the counter, Heidi grinning wide when she sees who it is. I wonder if he's ever dated her, but I can't bring myself to ask Rachel.

Returning my focus to the table, I lean across and whisper to Rachel, "Why didn't you tell me that he was going to be here?"

"Oh, didn't I? Sorry," Rachel shrugs innocently.

I should have known she'd try to pull something.

"Nope. You didn't. Not a word. You must have forgotten," I cock my head to the side and Paul laughs.

"Yeah, that's what happened. I meant to tell you that he'd be joining us but it slipped my mind. What, with you and Embry sneaking off under the bleachers and all," she smirks slyly.

Paul's eyes light up, "Is THAT where Embry ran off to? Huh, he told me he was going to get some hot chocolate."

"More like gave Lillah some hot chocolate," Rachel giggles.

I place my burning cheeks on the cool of the table top, rolling my eyes when I hear Paul and Rachel high five each other, "Good one, babe."

Before I can say anything Embry comes sauntering back over. When I lift my head, I can tell he's looking kind of smug. He pauses on our side of the table and waits for me to scoot over. I look up at him, chewing on my lip nervously. Even though I didn't want him to leave before, I wasn't really expecting to see him so soon after our little session. I had expected to have a reprieve in order to regain my senses.

When he sits down he takes up half of the space, like Paul did with Rachel. _What is it with these guys_? His thigh is pressed against mine and even though I know that I should, I don't move away. I can feel the heat of his skin through the denim covering his legs.

There is idle chit chat around me before Heidi brings our drinks over. I lean forward to add sweetener to my coffee and I feel a hand, Embry's hand, take the end of my ponytail in his fingers.

He threads his fingers in my hair and it causes him to tug it gently. The sensation travels across my scalp, along the back of my neck and shoots down my spine. I've always loved having someone play with my hair. Embry being the one that is doing it makes it one hundred times better. My body relaxes little by little when he doesn't make an attempt to stop what he's doing.

I lean back a little bit, leaving enough room for him to continue his game but allowing myself to relax against the back of my seat. Embry's arm slips around my waist and my eyes pop open. I didn't even realize they had closed until I feel his movement. We are sitting so close he's able to wrap his arm completely around me. His hand splays across my hip and my abdomen and he lowers his head so that it's next to my face. My stomach does somersaults at his touch.

"Do you mind telling me what is going on with you two?" Rachel's voice catches my attention and I look up at her through the fringe of my lashes.

I don't have the chance to refuse her an answer because Embry does it for me, "I do mind telling you, nosy. Nothing is going on. Lillah and I are just trying being friends."

Embry winks at me and then turns to look at Rachel, "I thought you wanted that."

Paul jumps to our defense against Rachel, who is eying Embry and scoffing, "Babe, back off."

Rachel crosses her arms like a spoiled little toddler that didn't get her way, "Fine. Don't tell me. I'll find out.

"Anyway, Embry, where have you been all week? Paul told me you didn't work as many hours at the shop as you normally do."

"I took on a couple of extra patrols to help out Sam and Jacob this week," I can feel Embry looking down at me, but I keep my head tilted down, sipping my coffee.

It's obvious Rachel doesn't like this answer, "What is going on with Jake that he couldn't do his patrols?"

"Nothing is going on; I volunteered so Sam could spend more time with his family and so Jake could see Ness more."

Embry is speaking and I feel like I should try to pay attention to the conversation, but I keep losing focus. The feeling of Embry's hand on me and his body next to mine keeps distracting me.

"Jake still hasn't told her, has he?" I look up when I hear the tone in Rachel's voice, surprised to see her frowning.

I realize they are talking about Jacob and his imprintee. I'm suddenly very interested in this conversation.

Embry shakes his head in response to Rachel, "Not that I know of. It's his decision on whether or not he ever tells her. I'm sure Edward and Bella would appreciate it if he never said anything to her."

I'm surprised when I realize they are saying Jacob hasn't told her yet. I can't imagine why he wouldn't want to tell her. I thought the point of imprinting is to be with the person that was made for you. I make a mental note to ask Rachel about that later. Clearly, I have a lot to learn about this whole wolf thing.

Rachel actually pouts at Embry's statement, "He has to tell her. She's nearly grown now. I can't wait for her to officially be my sister-in-law."

Paul laughs at this statement, "Babe, even if Jake tells her, that doesn't mean they are getting married. Besides, they can't get married before we do."

When Heidi comes hobbling over I watch her place a huge steak, loaded baked potato and two desserts in front of Embry. I almost start laughing when I see all of it. That is, until he starts pushing a caramel sundae my way. It's three huge scoops of ice cream, caramel sauce, whipped cream and topped with a cherry.

I frown, pointing at the sundae, "What's that?"

Embry leans over and whispers against my ear, sending chills down my spine, "It's your dessert. Please eat."

"Embry, I can't. I mean, I'm not hungry," I try to protest. Unfortunately, that is the moment my stomach chooses to grumble.

Embry moves his baked potato onto a spare plate, sliding the plate in front of me. He whispers again, "If we are going to be friends, you have to promise me no more diets. You look great, just like you are. If you are hungry, please, eat."

My brain can't function fast enough with him so close. I mean to tell him that I'm _not_ on a diet, I just eat healthy, but I can only manage to nod once. I glance shyly up at Rachel and Paul and I see both of them smirking.

I sigh and pick up a fork and take a bite of the baked potato. Embry grins wide and his smile makes me grin in return. I like making him happy, regardless of him assuming things that aren't true.

He reaches over, taking his own bite of the baked potato before asking, "Mind if we share?"

"No, I don't mind sharing with a friend," I blush and tell him quietly before taking another small bite.

His beaming smile makes me want to eat the whole darn thing. _If he keeps this up, I'll be rolling home._I eat a few small forkfuls before turning to the thing that I'm trying not to drool over. Well, aside from Embry and his caramel colored skin, that is.

I am in love with caramel sauce. Completely in love with it. If it were a man, I would have an affair with it. I could probably eat this entire sundae, lick the bowl clean and then have another sundae.

I take the cherry that is on top and I set it aside until the end. I start eating it layer by later. Whipped cream first, then the caramel and ice cream. I'm in the zone, eating it slowly, savoring it bite by bite. I usually only eat small bits of sweets here and there. But this, I can't resist it. It's true that it's my favorite dessert but I especially want to eat it when Embry is the reason that it's on the table before me.

While we eat there is light conversation around the table. Bursts of chatter that turn into lulls intermittently.

Embry dives into his strawberry sundae and I steal glances of him eating. He takes his time, much the same as I do. I notice a drop of strawberry sauce on his full bottom lip and I find it hard to tear my eyes away until he licks it with his tongue. That only seems to make the desire worse. He keeps stealing glances at me, watching my progress in between talking to Paul. I randomly discuss school with Rachel but for the most part, I am silent.

I finish my sundae and pop the cherry, stem and all, into my mouth. I work it around in my mouth for a few seconds and then pull the stem out and throw it on my napkin. I've knotted it. It's my only party trick. If I'm feeling extremely sassy and if the stem is long enough, I can sometimes do a double knot.

I glance at Embry to find him looking down at the cherry stem on my napkin. When he looks at me, his eyes are dark, but he smiles and winks at me. The next moment, he's pulling his own cherry stem out of his mouth. He's tied _his_ into a double knot. _Oh. My. God._

Needing a distraction, I focus on Rachel and Paul. I can't help giggling when I hear them mock fighting over the huge wedge of pie they are sharing. Rachel thinks Paul is eating her half, to make up for it, Paul offers her a bite off of his fork.

I lean back against the booth seat and sigh happily; I could curl up on the seat right now and just completely pass out. I never expected that I'd be sitting here next to Embry, comfortable enough to want to cuddle up against him. I yawn several times and rub my hands across my face. I know I should go soon. If I don't I might not be able to drive myself home. I just don't want to move. This is probably the most perfect ending to an imperfect week.

I lift my head just in time to see that Embry and Paul are laying money down on the table. _Uh no, I cannot allow him to pay for my food_. I open my mouth to speak, to refuse, but Rachel shakes her head, telling me not to. I don't want to take advantage of this new found friendship and I have money of my own. I give in when Rachel continues to look at me, seeming to will me to let it go. _Okay. Fine_. I sigh and roll my eyes at her. Rachel smiles softly back at me before turning to kiss Paul on the cheek.

We all pile out of the booth and start to walk toward the exit. Paul and Rachel are in front of Embry and I and they have their arms wrapped around one another. It's sweet to see a couple so in love and I find myself a little jealous of them. I always wanted to be in that kind of relationship. I thought that maybe when I'd started dating Carter that he could be that guy for me. I was terribly wrong, on all accounts, when it came to him.

I'm surprised, and a little giddy, when I feel Embry's warm hand envelope mine. A day ago I would have never allowed him to touch me so much. Hell, a day ago, he would have never touched me this much. I'm amazed at the turn around. I'm once again curious about what made him change his mind. I want to ask him but I'm afraid that I won't like the answer.

I don't know the protocol here. I've never really been friends with a guy before. And definitely not a guy that I've made out with or hope to soon make out with again. I lick my lips and decide that there will be more making out and groppage... or at the very least, kissing.

Even though I know Heidi doesn't like me, I still turn to thank her. When I look over my shoulder, I can see she is staring at Embry and I. More than staring, she is glaring, specifically at my hand in Embry's. If looks could kill, I'm pretty sure I wouldn't still be standing. Ignoring my need to be polite, I turn back to face the door, not saying anything to her or Embry about the nasty look she was giving.

I glance at him sideways and see that he's looking straight ahead but that he has a small smile on his face. Seeing that makes me smile a full blown grin. When we reach the door Embry doesn't allow me to open it. He pushes my hand away gently and allows me to walk in front of him after he opens the door for me.

Rachel gives me a quick hug as Paul and Embry shake hands.

Rachel whispers against my ear, "Did he invite you to the bonfire tomorrow?"

"Yeah," I whisper back, unsure how she knows this.

"Good," Rachel grins as she pulls back slightly, but still whispers, "come by my house at noon, I'll share lunch and you will share details."

I giggle at Rachel's determination to find out everything, but agree. Rachel and Paul wave as they dash off to her car. I can see Paul holding the door open for her to get in and it hits me that these guys are true gentlemen.

"Come on, I'll walk you to your car." Embry offers his hand to me again.

I start to protest, not wanting him to feel obligated, "Oh, no, Embry you don't have to-"

"Lillah," Embry says, cutting me off. The sound of him saying my name sends a thrill through me, "There aren't just bad humans out there."

I lift my hands in surrender, but confused by his statement, "Fine."

Embry smiles, taking one of my lifted hands in his and using his free hand to pull the hood of my jacket up.

As we walk, I realize even though I've known him for only a few days he has managed to surprise me in so many ways. This is just one more thing on the list. Carter never walked me out to my car or opened a door for me. The man walking next to me is more of a gentleman than anyone that I know, other than my dad at least.

Embry interrupts my thoughts as we get closer to my car, "Lillah, I'm sorry I've been such an ass. And I'm going to go ahead and apologize for being an ass in the future. You didn't do anything wrong. I'm sorry."

I nod my head in understanding but don't speak. I can't look up at him because I know if I do, I'll kiss him here in this parking lot. _Actually, I want to do more than kiss him._

As we approach my car Embry frowns when he first sees it.

And then he makes fun of it. "What the hell is this? It looks like a hatch-back and a SUV had a one night stand and this was their 'oops' kid!"

He chuckles at his own joke, which is so cute that I just want to hug him and tell him he can call my car an "oops kid" any time he wants. I fight myself to keep from laughing by frowning at him instead.

Embry sobers up quickly, "Did I mention I apologize for being an ass in the future?"

I shake my head, but I can't help the small smile blooming across my face.

I move to get into my car but Embry's hand shoots out to stop me, "Not so quick. You're forgetting something."

I'm puzzled by what he thinks I forgot, "No, I have everything I took into the diner, this time."

The words are barely out of my mouth before he is pulling me to him, pressing his lips to mine and cutting me off. This time it's more gentle, more full of something that I can't really put my finger on. His scruff scratches against the places on my face that were abraded earlier. I can tell he's trying to avoid marking me any further but I step closer anyway, sealing my lips around his more. I wrap my arms around his waist, both to hold on to him and so I don't fall to the ground.

Embry's tongue slips into my mouth and I touch mine to his tentatively. Why am I being shy now? I guess now that we are 'friends'; I'm unsure what to do. I want to keep going, to kiss him deeper and to touch him more but I don't want to feel awkward about it later. I sigh when I taste the sweet strawberry sundae on his tongue, his lips.

When Embry pulls away I look down, trying to even out my breathing. Embry's arms don't move from around my waist, holding me to him gently. A few seconds pass before I glance up quickly and ask, "So what did I forget?"

"You almost forgot your goodnight kiss." He lifts my face and kisses my eye lids, nose and then my lips once more.

"Good night, Lillah. Drive safe. I'll see you tomorrow."

I _will_ see him tomorrow but I'm sad to end this day that actually turned out okay.

I climb into my car, crank it up and watch him in my rear view mirror until I've driven too far and can't see him any longer. Every time I lick my lips I taste him on them. They are still tender and a little swollen from the pressure of Embry's mouth. I hope that I get to kiss him like that again. Possibly tomorrow?

I'm surprised at how excited I am to be able to see him again in such a short amount of time. Yesterday I never would have dreamed I would feel this way about him. To think that maybe we are going to really be friends makes me happy. I wouldn't usually be okay with having a 'friends with benefits' type relationship with someone. But Embry isn't just 'someone'. I feel connected to him and I don't want to lose that. Even if it means just being friends.

I'm pulling into my driveway when my Blackberry beeps, signaling that I have a new text message. I grab it and my purse and run to the porch before checking my message. When I open it and read it I sigh and roll my eyes. It's another text from what I suspect is Carter's new number. This one reads _I miss you._ I haven't replied to any of his messages or answered any of his calls, from either number, but I guess he still hasn't gotten the hint.

I throw my purse and jacket on the table in the entry way and go to my bedroom. I had planned on reading a book until I fell asleep. But right now all I can think of is a warm shower then climbing into my bed to dream of Embry. The sooner I go to sleep, the sooner I can see him again.

-0-

**A/N:** In case you aren't aware, we are participating in 2 great charity efforts. First, **Fics for Nashville**. Tara grew up in Nashville, so this is very close to her heart. For just a $5 donation to a charity of your choice, you can get tons of great fics, including one by us. For more info check out - community [dot] livejournal [dot] com / ficsfornash / .

Second, **Fandom Gives Back.** Last year Fandom Gives Back raised over $87,000 thanks to the generosity of Twilight fans. We have 2 selections available for this year, a _First Come First Serve_ of any canon wolf fic and an _Auction_ of Losing Control, including an outtake and a peek at our Losing Control master calendar. For more info check out www [dot] thefandomgivesback [dot] com.

We hope you enjoyed this chapter. Lillah has another one coming up, busy day ahead for her!


	9. Chapter 9 Brand New Day

**Chapter 9 "Brand New Day"**

**Disclaimer:** We own a bunch of stuff. None of which consists of SM's characters or her story. The things that we do own are a shit load of nail polish, an overflowing bookcase or two, and Lillah, Carter and Eli. 

_Oh oh oh oh  
This is a brand new day  
Oh oh oh oh  
And it's getting better every single way  
Oh oh oh oh  
This is brand new day  
Oh oh oh oh  
And I'm feeling better when you say  
La la la la la la la love_  
"Brand New Day" - Tim Myers Ft. Lindsey Ray

**LPOV**

Saturday morning I wake up before my alarm goes off. I jump out of bed, with a wide smile, ready to start my day. After making my bed I walk into the bathroom, letting out a little gasp when I see my face. I still have red marks on my chin and cheeks, beard burn, from last night. I trace it with my fingers, smiling as I relive the memory of being held by Embry. This time last week I was in a whole other world. And now- I watch as my face is slowly covered in a blush. My life has completely changed.

Pulling my hair into a ponytail, I wash my face then brush my teeth. I have so much energy that I am considering doubling my running path today. I'm meeting Rachel this afternoon for lunch then we are going to head to the beach together. Until then, I need to entertain myself somehow. I turn looking at the clock and decide, a run first, and then I'll come back home, shower and have a nice breakfast. I'm doubtful I'll be able to eat much later. I can already feel the butterflies of excitement begin to flourish just thinking about the day ahead.

Pushing all of my nerves to the back of my mind I pull on my running clothes and get ready to head out. As I walk out of the house I notice that it's only sprinkling rain now. The sight makes me pretty happy. It couldn't be more perfect if it were sunny. I start thinking about the evening and the bonfire, hoping it won't start pouring again. I really want to spend the evening with Embry and see what happens.

-0-

Half way through my run I start to slow, and take in my surroundings. Even though I spent the first ten years of my life in Forks, and many summers after that, I'm still amazed at how beautiful and green the area is. I wish I could bring my camera with me while I'm on my run. I make a mental note to grab it before I go over to La Push; leave a few minutes early and snap some shots on the way to Rachel's house.

After making my plans I speed up again, anxious to get back home and clean up. I've decided I'll do my hair and put on a little bit of make-up, play up my eyes and lips. There is a part of me that wants to make sure I look amazing tonight. I want to impress Embry more than I've ever wanted to impress anyone. I laugh and shake my head at how ridiculous I'm being.

As soon as I walk into the house I flip on my iHome and start stripping down, dropping my running clothes on the bathroom floor. In my head I start planning what I'm going to wear later. Something for comfort, I don't want to look overly obvious seeing as I've never really successfully... seduced a man. _Is that what I'm doing? Trying to seduce him?_ Possibly.

I wash my hair slowly, taking the time to relax and daydream, not wanting to be rushed and be frazzled when I get to La Push. I finish washing my hair and before I turn off the water, I decide I should shave too; my legs, under my arms and all of the other 'necessary' places. I grab two towels, wrapping one around my hair and the other around my body before stepping out of the shower.

I draw a smiley face on the steamed up medicine cabinet mirror, smiling as it grins back at me. I can hear my cell phone ringing through the closed bathroom door. Dashing into my bedroom, I check the caller i.d. and grin when I see it's my mother. I sit down on the edge of the bed, making sure my towel completely covers me, then answer the phone.

"Hi mom! Happy Saturday!" A little giggle escapes as I say this.

My mother is instantly suspicious, "Hi Lillah. What are you so happy about this morning?"

"Do I need a reason to be happy? It's a beautiful Saturday morning."

There is a pause on the other side of the phone, "No, you don't need a reason. I'm just surprised, that's all. You've sounded so down lately, I like hearing your this happy. Do you have any plans for today, dear?"

"I do have plans, actually." I hesitate before continuing, considering my words carefully, "My friend Rachel invited me to have lunch with her and then to join her at a bonfire tonight on the Quileute Reservation." I want to mention Embry, tell my mom about last night, but I can't, not yet anyway.

"Oh, that sounds lovely! I'm so glad you are making friends there."

"Me too, Mom. Rachel has these two friends, Emily and Kim, they are so sweet. Emily invited all of us over for dinner on Thursday. It was so nice getting to just sit around and giggle with these women. I had a really good time."

I can hear my mom smiling on the other end of the phone, "Well no wonder you sound so excited. They sound lovely. I hope I get to meet them sometime."

"I hope so too, Mom. Are you and Daddy planning to visit soon?"

"Hopefully. Maybe a weekend around your birthday. Anything you want this year?"

_Embry. _I stop myself before I can vocalize that wish. "No, Mom, there isn't anything I want or need. I'd be happy with just a quiet weekend with you two."

"Alright, well, think about it. You sure you wouldn't want something sparkly? Like diamond earrings or a necklace?"

"That's you, Mom. Not me. I'm more like Daddy, I like the simple things in life." I shake my head. As I play with my friendship bracelet, I can't help grinning as I think about my mom and her love of jewelry. While I appreciate jewelry, I prefer simple over sparkly, family heirlooms over brand new.

"Ok dear. If you change your mind, let us know. You go enjoy your day. I can't wait to hear all about it."

My mom mentioning my day makes me giddy again. I'm now anxious to hang up the phone, wanting to get back to my preparations, "Ok Mom, I love you. Give Daddy my love."

"Of course, love you too, Lillah. Have fun."

"I will. Bye!"

I quickly end the call, carrying the BlackBerry with me as I run back into the bathroom. The steam, and my smiley face, are gone from the mirror, but the smile on my face is still there. I am so ready for this day to get going. I'm giddy and happy and so very excited that I consider calling Rachel to see if I can stop by earlier than originally planned. I don't want to appear too pushy or forward so I contemplate this idea while I turn on the hair dryer; slowly, methodically running a brush through my hair, pulling sections of my hair straight. Once my hair is dry and straight, I plug in my big barrel curling iron to put some loose curls through my hair. I don't know why I'm doing this because I'll probably end up pulling it into a ponytail later but I can't help myself.

After I finish working on my hair, I begin the process of my make-up. Light foundation, a touch of blush, pink eye shadow with a little bit of smudged eyeliner to create a smokey effect. I swipe on some mascara quickly, reminding myself not to poke my eye with the wand like I usually do. I'm hoping to wear my contacts and that won't happen if my eyes are irritated and watery.

I stand back and look at myself, smiling softly. I really hope I didn't go through all of this trouble only to have him laugh in my face or, worse, take the 'friends' label to heart and show up with a 'date'. That last thought makes me cringe.

I don't really know if one brings a date to a bonfire because I've never attended one before, but I'm pretty sure you can bring a date to anything. My line of thoughts reminds me of seeing him in Forks, a beautiful brunette on his back, smiling and happy.

Embry seems like a nice guy, when he allows himself to be. I'm sure he deserves to be happy, to find someone to love. I'm just not so sure I like the idea of it being someone other than me. I frown at myself, turning away from the mirror and walking into my bedroom. I shouldn't be thinking about him like this. We are just barely friends and here I am contemplating him falling in love with someone, hoping that it's me. It makes zero sense.

I grab my favorite pair of jeans and a cute top from the closet then go over to my dresser to grab panties and a bra. I pause when I take the simple white cotton underclothes in my hand. Something pretty and lacy catches my eye and I consider whether or not I should wear it instead. I don't think it really matters either way but I trade them out. Maybe if I'm wearing 'power panties', I'll feel more confident. Not that I have ever felt any confidence around a man, especially around a man I'm attracted to. Hell, if I'm being honest, Embry is the only man I've found myself attracted to, ever.

I dress quickly; anxious to see how I look, hoping I'm not too overdone or obvious. I look at myself in my full length mirror. _Not too bad,_ I decide after a few seconds of scrutiny. I glance at my bedside table and see it's almost time for me to leave. I'm glad I took my time and killed most of my morning. I'd have gone stir crazy if I had to wait for a couple more hours with nothing to do. I pull on my shoes; grab a jacket, my cell phone, purse and car keys, then head out.

When I step into the garage I smile at my baby, my first car. Today would be a nice day for her to stretch her legs. The rain will be minimal and I can really have fun with her on the stretch of highway into La Push. A few minutes later I'm in the car driving out of my little 'neighborhood'. I send Rachel a quick text, letting her know I'm leaving my house and I will see her soon. She replies back quickly, her excitement evident in her message, _Hurry up! But be careful._

I chuckle and shake my head before tossing my BlackBerry into the passenger seat. I flip the radio on, smile and crank it up when one of my favorite songs fills the interior of the car. As I drive along, tapping my fingers on the steering wheel to the beat of the music, I realize I haven't been this excited, or anticipated something this much, since I moved back home. I feel light and happy, like a teenager going on her first date.

I make a few random stops on the drive, snapping pictures of foliage and trees but for the most part I just allow myself to enjoy my drive. I daydream a little, hoping that when Rachel and I get to the bonfire, Embry will be happy to see me.

I imagine him standing with Paul when I approach; his handsome face breaks out into a smile. I'm a little baffled as to why I've suddenly decided I want him to be excited about seeing me when I wanted nothing more than for him to never speak to me again a couple of days ago, but I'm not going to worry about that right now.

-0-

Rachel is standing on her front porch when I pull up to the house. It's such a cute place with its little pots of flowers on the porch. I can't contain a giggle when I see a gnome.

"'Bout time you got here!" Rachel grins as I open the car door and step out.

"What? I'm a little early, aren't I?"

"Nope, you are about thirty minutes late, actually."

"Really? I left home early..." I look down at my watch and frown when I realize she's right.

"I know. I was getting worried. I'd thought about sending Paul out to look for you. Did you get lost?"

Rachel walks down the porch steps to meet me. We hug one another tightly and I follow her inside.

"No, I guess I just lost track of time. I stopped a few times to take pictures but I didn't think it took me that long. Sorry to have made you worry."

"It's okay. I hoped you were just taking your time," Rachel waves her hand dismissively as we walk into the kitchen.

I don't know what Rachel is cooking but it smells divine. I walk over to the oven to try to peek but she hip checks me out of the way.

"Hey! I can't even see what I'm going to be eating for lunch?"

"Not yet," Rachel smiles smugly, taking my jacket and purse from my hands.

I follow her into the living room where she places my things on a small bench next to the front door, "How's your morning been? Is Paul off getting ready for tonight?"

"It's been pretty quiet. Jacob came by this morning with Embry," she cuts her eyes at me and smiles.

"The guys are all setting up. Probably more goofing off than setting up though. They like to play football on the beach before everyone starts showing up for the night."

"Oh?" I pause casually, hoping I'm not too obvious by what I'm about to ask, "What did Jacob and Embry stop by for? They should have stayed and had lunch with us."

"They were just picking up a few things that are stored in the shed. I'm pretty sure Embry would have stayed if Jacob would have allowed it. He was especially interested in what time you'd be getting here."

"Ah, well, I'm sure they are having more fun on the beach than they would be here with us," I shrug and take a seat on the couch.

Butterflies are dancing in my stomach at the information that Embry talked about me. _Just friends. We are just friends._

"I kind of doubt it. At least where Embry is concerned."

I don't reply to that statement at all, letting her think what she wants. I'm going to try not to get my 'hopes up' when it comes to Embry and this friendship. The scary thing is, I think maybe I already have.

"So you and Embry. Friends?"

"Um, yeah, so he says. He's kind of giving me whiplash," I admit to her. "Hating me one second, being nice the next."

"Yeah, it's a pattern with these guys. Don't worry though, he'll come around."

"Come around? Meaning what? That he and I will be BFFs?"

"Possibly," Rachel shrugs lightly, "What if it were more than that? Would you want to be more than just friends with him?"

"I don't know," I watch her face closely, looking for some sign of - something.

Rachel exhales slowly, not quite looking me in the eye when she speaks, "Lillah, just so you know. He doesn't - didn't hate you. It's just hard for him to be okay with you learning our secret."

"I can understand that, honestly, Rachel. But it felt like more than that."

"Did you talk to him about it? Did you ask him?" She looks me in the eye, like she's trying to tell me something.

"No," I shake my head, "I thought if he wanted to share with me, he would."

"Maybe."

Rachel looks down and mutters something I can't hear.

"What do you know that you aren't telling me?"

"Nothing," Rachel blurts out quickly, leaving me to believe there is, in fact, something more that I don't know.

I get the feeling that even though I've talked to Billy and Sue and then Rachel, Kim and Emily, I am being left out.

"You should maybe ask Embry, if you want to know more."

"I doubt very seriously he's going to explain anything to me. He only suggested being friends because he knew it was either that or constant fighting and tension."

I hate admitting this out loud to Rachel, but it's the only thing I can think of to explain his change of heart.

"I don't really think that's it, Lillah. It's just hard for Embry sometimes. He really only has the other guys and us imprintees."

"Family?" I ask, leaning forward.

"No one that matters," Rachel answers vaguely.

Before I can ask what she means by that, the oven timer goes off and Rachel jumps up from her chair.

"Lunch is ready!" she calls out to me when she reaches the kitchen.

I take a deep breath and walk slowly into the kitchen, planning to continue my questions. Rachel is plating large squares of lasagna, "Vegetable lasagna? Rach, it looks so good."

"Thanks," she grins at me while placing the plates on the table. "I don't usually cook vegetable entrees with Paul around. He's more of a meat and potatoes kind of guy."

"Does that apply to all of them?"

"Pretty much. But they'll eat almost anything you put in front of them."

"Why am I not surprised?" I mutter to myself.

I file this information away, thinking maybe if this 'friends' thing with Embry works out, I'll make him dinner some time. It would be nice to have someone to eat with on occasion.

We eat in companionable silence for a few minutes before something pops into my head since food is involved.

"Rachel, why didn't you let me say anything when they paid for us last night?"

"Lillah, these guys are proud. They like to take care of us," Rachel tells me cryptically.

"So now that Embry and I are friends he's not going to allow me to fend for myself?"

"W- Lillah, don't be too hard on him. He's really struggling right now. Just let him be nice to you. It'll make you both happy in the long run."

When she cuts herself off I decide not to dig, knowing there are still secrets she can't share.

"Okay, I'll try. It's just hard for me to allow someone to do that. I don't like feeling dependent. Especially to a guy."

"Trying is all I ask," Rachel smiles happily and goes back to her lasagna.

A few moments later, Rachel's smile turns wicked, "Speaking of last night, I'm curious what kind of 'friendship' you and Embry agreed to."

"What do you mean?" I speak slowly, almost afraid of what Rachel will say next.

"Well, for me at least, I don't usually play tonsil hockey in the middle of a parking lot with my friends."

My cheeks turn bright pink, I know this because I can feel the heat coming off of them. _I can't believe she saw us. ___

"Um, well, I don't know. We haven't really talked about the uh, boundaries, of our friendship."

I pause for a moment then point out, "_He_ kissed _me_."

Rachel's laughter is loud and gleeful, "Oh this is going to be fun to watch. And yes, I saw him initiate the kiss, but you can't deny that you were an _active_ participant."

I hang my head, returning my focus to the vegetable lasagna in hopes that Rachel will drop the subject. There is a lull for a few more minutes, I finally decide it is safe to ask her more of my own questions.

"Is it okay if I ask you something about Jacob?"

"Yeah. I mean, I don't know if I can answer you but I'll try," Rachel looks up, placing her fork next to her plate so she can give me her undivided attention.

"At the diner last night, you and Paul and Embry were talking about Jacob not telling his imprintee. Why would he not want her to know?"

"Oh, well... I don't know for sure how much I can tell you. Jacob imprinted on Ness when she was really young. Her parents know about us too," Rachel fidgets in her chair and I can tell she's choosing her words wisely.

"They made an agreement with Jacob, he has to wait until she's older before he tells her. The three of them decided it should be her choice, whether she's 'with' him or not. I'm excited for you to meet her though. She's really sweet and I couldn't have chosen anyone better for my brother. It's hard for _me_ not to tell her, so I can't imagine what it's like for Jacob."

"So she has no idea?"

"No, I don't believe so. She and Jacob are 'friends' right now," Rachel rolls her eyes and does air quotations with her fingers.

"How long does he have to wait before he can tell her?"

"The agreement was he would wait until she's eighteen," Rachel snorts quietly at some inside joke.

"How old is she now?"

"She's... seventeen," Rachel looks down at her plate and picks up her fork.

"Not much longer, then," I pick up my fork and continue to eat as well.

"Yeah. He's talking about throwing a huge birthday party for her next September."

"Oh," I laugh, "He has plenty of time to plan."

"Mhm, that's what I said too but he's pretty set on planning it now."

"I can't wait to meet her. I'm pretty excited about meeting everyone actually. As long as I can manage to not think about the 'wolf' part."

"It'll take some time but you won't even think about it in a few weeks. When I first found out it was shocking but things kind of started to fall into place. I realized why certain things had been happening."

Hearing this makes me sit up and lean my elbows on the table, "So you didn't know before Paul imprinted on you? You had no idea?"

"Well, I'd heard the legends while I was growing up but I never dreamed they were real. Rebecca, Jacob and I used to laugh when Daddy would tell us the stories, rolling our eyes at our crazy old man. Guess he wasn't so crazy after all."

I take a second to think about this. I'd assumed Rachel had grown up knowing because of Jacob being a shape-shifter too. I'm surprised to learn not even family members are told until it's necessary.

"So tell me how it happened. When Paul imprinted on you."

I watch Rachel's face light up. She takes our plates to put them in the sink. Rachel brings over a slice of cake for us to share along with two glasses of milk before beginning her tale.

I sit and listen to her raptly, soaking up her story. It's sweet and romantic, hearing the details of how my friend fell in love with her fiancé. It also makes me ache a little, wishing I had the same thing. Maybe not necessarily the imprintee thing, because I'm not exactly bred for it like the other girls, but a love half that strong would be nice.

-0-

I spent most of the afternoon at Rachel's, hanging out and relaxing with her. It is different from before, now that I know a little bit of what Rachel has to keep secret. She seems more relaxed now that I know at least some of the tribe history and she can talk to someone about it. I'm happy I can be that person for her and hope our bond will grow even stronger over time because of it.

I help Rachel put the leftovers away. She's supposed to meet Paul and the others at First Beach to help finish setting up so I make myself scarce, telling her I'm going for a drive. My plan is to take more pictures and explore the area while I have the chance. Rachel waves to me from the front porch as I back out of the driveway. She's made a few suggestions on places where she thinks I'll get nice shots.

First stop, Flattery Rocks National Wildlife Refuge, or as close as I can get to it since it's off limits to us non wildlife types. _No humans allowed_. I use a few different lenses and snap some beautiful birds before moving on.

I have the spot where I first met Embry on my mind. The piece of beach that he took me to after Paul phased in front of me. As I'm driving I realize that a lot of the places I'm seeing look the same. I'm not sure if I'll be able to find it. Then I remember that it was near Billy's house, so I head in that direction. I spot a small sand parking lot and whip into it. I spy two people further down the beach, a male and a female, but I can't see their faces clearly.

Climbing out of the car with my camera in hand I start toward the beach. I lift my camera so I can zoom in on the couple. Just as I get focused, I realize it's Embry and the girl I saw him carrying on his back in Forks. Now that I can see her more closely, I can admit to myself how beautiful she really is. She leaps into Embry's arms just as he turns to face her. He's smiling brightly, obviously happy to see her.

I pause, not going any further. I don't want to interfere in this moment, especially considering I don't know who she is. In the back of my mind there is a needling and I frown. _Is this one of the girls he sleeps with? Is this another 'friend' of his?_

I'm instantly jealous. I tell myself it does no good for me to be envious of how happy he seems with her. He hasn't asked anything of me. I haven't told him I might be interested in being more than friends. If I hadn't already been told he hasn't imprinted, I might think that maybe she is the one. I'm doubtful she's family, since Rachel said he didn't really have anyone.

I come to the conclusion that she has to be someone from the reservation. Except, as I look at her again, I notice she's not really Quileute or any other form of Native American. She has dark hair with a hint of copper, pale skin and dark eyes, she's definitely not from around here.

I drop my camera from in front of my face before I see something that might make me feel worse than I already do. _Friends. Friends. We are only friends._ I repeat to myself over and over while walking back to my car. I'm not going to allow myself to be sad over him possibly dating someone. _A beautiful someone_.

Tonight will be fun, I tell myself firmly. Damnit, I need some fun. I _deserve_ some fun.

I'm back in my car and on the road in a few minutes, moving a little further into La Push. I notice a high cliff and drive in that direction, thinking from that vantage point, I can probably see a lot of the reservation, or I'm hoping to at least. I drive slowly even though I'm anxious to get there. I have plenty of time to kill before sundown, when I'm supposed to be at First Beach. I park a distance away from the path that I see leads to the cliff. A little fresh air will clear my mind and help me focus.

As I make my way through the forest, I'm glad I put on my hiking boots. I see some rather large rocks I'm going to have to climb over to get to the top. I take my time over the rocks, not wanting to trip over anything. I stand and look around when I finally reach the top, it's breathtaking.

Pulling out my camera I take a few shots from different angles and perspectives, changing out my lenses here and there. After I finish, I slip my equipment back in my case and slowly lower myself to the ground. Now that I'm here I'm not in any hurry to leave. I decide to just hang out until it's time for me to meet Rachel so I can follow her to the bonfire.

I'm sitting close to the edge, my feet hanging off and bouncing around carelessly. Even from my high up perch I can hear the waves crashing below me. It's peaceful and I make a mental note to come back here when I have more time. I know if I'm late, Rachel will worry and I don't want Embry to think I'm standing him up.

Just before I pull my legs back so I can stand I feel someone place a hand on my shoulder. I turn my head just slightly to see who it is.

It's Embry and he looks terrified. His eyes are round as saucers and his mouth is pinched. I look down to his neck, his corded muscles standing out and then his chest. _He's shirtless_, I realize. My eyes travel down his arm, to the hand that is weighing me down. Out of the corner of my eye I see that there is more skin exposed than I thought. My eyebrows raise in surprise when I see that, not only is he shirtless, he's stark naked?

"Embry? What are you _doing_?" I turn my head before I allow my eyes to get any further than his waist.

"Lill-," he starts to gasp my name but cuts himself off, "Get away from the edge. What the fuck are _you_ doing? Are you trying to get yourself killed?"

Embry's voice sounds frantic with fear. He wraps his arms around my waist and lifts me so quickly and with so much strength that I feel like I'm flying through the air.

I'm standing in the middle of trees before I even realize Embry has moved me from the cliffs. He doesn't even seem winded even though he had to have been running ridiculously fast. He places me on my feet but my legs almost give out before I catch myself by grabbing his biceps.

"Are you okay?" Embry's voice is a little shaky and when I look up at him I realize he still looks panicked.

"I'm fine, Embry," I tell him, hoping to assuage his worry.

"What the hell were you doing, Lillah?" I'm too dismayed to answer his question.

"Fine, don't tell me!" he pulls away from me, moving to turn his back to me. But before he is able to give me his back, I see a tattoo on his arm and I stop him.

"Can I see this?" I point at his upper arm, not wanting to touch him and set him off again.

"What? See what?" Embry looks down to where I'm pointing and then sighs. "Can I dress first?"

"Oh, ye-yeah, sorry. I forgot- Sorry, go ahead," I ramble and turn my back to him. I can feel my face once again burning red because I've been standing here with him naked.

I hear Embry shuffling around behind me and then clear his throat.

"All done. You can turn around now."

I slowly turn to face him, wondering to myself how he could have dressed so quickly. And then I see why he was speedy. He's wearing only a pair of jeans and nothing else. No shirt or shoes. I try not to ogle him but, to be honest, that's kind of hard. Thick corded neck, beautiful collar bones, broad shoulders, muscular chest and arms and a twenty four pack of abs. My eyes trail down the smattering of hair down his stomach, leading into the waist band of his jeans.

"Geez Lillah, my eyes are up here!"

His deep voice and the sound of Embry chuckling breaks me out of the trance I'm in. I look up to him, not quite meeting his eyes. My gaze lands on his arm again and I step forward before realizing it. The ink is some sort of tribal design and it instantly fascinates me. _It's also sexy._

"What does it mean?" I ask, skipping over any comments I might have made about his lack of clothing.

"It's a uh, just this thing that all of the guys have. Here I'll show you," he leans down so that I can see it better and begins to explain the symbolism behind it.

"That's pretty amazing, Embry."

"Oh. Thanks, I guess. It's just something we all did when the change happened. To bind us together or whatever," Embry shrugs as if it's all nothing.

"It's beautiful," I tell him simply, hoping he believes me.

"Do _you_ have any tattoos?" Embry asks me abruptly, taking the focus off of himself.

"Me? Absolutely, definitely - No. I'm deathly afraid of needles. But I sometimes have this fantasy where I get brave and take the plunge," I grin when he laughs happily.

I watch the play of muscles on his chest and arm when he lifts a hand to rub the back of his neck.

"And what would you tattoo on that beautiful body of yours, if you were brave enough?"

I try to ignore his 'beautiful body' comment, though my blush returns in full force. I do my best to stay focused on the conversation at hand.

"I haven't allowed my fantasy to get that far. I'd want something meaningful though."

"Meaningful, huh? Like what? A flower? Your zodiac sign? A cute kitten?"

"No!" I laugh with him and shake my head, "Something meaningful. Something that I can look at every day and be reminded of what's important. Of what I love and what I live for."

Embry spins around quickly, taking me by surprise by stepping in front of me, his massive body completely hiding me from whatever he hears approaching. Embry lifts his hand and makes this strange sound. I peek around his raised arm and see Sam approaching us slowly. He's also clothed only in blue jeans. _Must be a wolf thing._

"Should I go?" I ask, not wanting to interfere in 'official business'.

"Nah, you're good. I'm sure Sam just realized I wasn't…uh…in wolf form anymore. He probably just wants to make sure everything is okay."

Sam and Embry do some manly man handshake thing before we begin exchanging small talk. I step around Embry so I can see Sam clearly. Embry was correct in his assumption of why Sam came looking for us. Sam comments on the time and I glance up through the trees, realizing the little bit of sun we had today is starting to fade. I must have been on the cliffs longer than I thought.

"I should get to Rachel's. She's probably freaking out," I say reluctantly. I'm not really interested in leaving Embry right now. I'd like to bask in the cordial banter we had going before Sam arrived.

"Yeah, you'd better get moving, Rachel will be pissed if you're late," Sam smirks.

"Yeah, Sam's right, you should probably get going," Embry reaches up and runs his hand back and forth over his cropped hair a few times.

"I could give you guys a ride if you wanted," I cross my toes inside my shoes, hoping they agree.

"That's nice of you, Lillah but I think I'll just phase and run back home. I'm going to help Emi with the kids," Sam declines pretty quickly.

"I can't wait to see them again," I say and Sam smiles, nodding at me before doing the handshake thing with Embry and walking away.

"You want a ride? Or are you going to run too? I could race you. Me in my car, you on your...paws," I giggle at the image that idea puts in my head.

Embry gets this look on his face like he doesn't really know what to say. But he quickly recovers, shaking his head and clearing his throat.

"Yeah, that would be cool. I'd like a ride. I'll text Rachel to let her know you are with me," Embry spins around rapidly, reaching back for my hand.

We walk in silence. He seems tense again and I go over our encounter in my head. I can't figure out what I said or did to upset him. He pulls his phone from his pocket, types out a message quickly and then shoves it back in, his frustration evident.

Embry stops when we reach the small sandy lot where my car is parked, "Where's your car? Did you walk here from somewhere?"

"No, it's right in front of you," I look at him to make sure he noticed it sitting there.

"This is yours? What about that other thing you were driving last night?"

"That's my 'reliable' car. This is my baby. I don't get her out often, she lives in the garage most of the time," I tug his hand and get him moving again.

"'She'?"

"Yeah, her name is Candy, like her color, candy apple red," I giggle.

"Of course that's her name," Embry sends me a side long glance.

"Get in," I instruct and climb in, leaning across the passenger seat to unlock his door for him. "Maybe one day, if your nice to me, I'll let you drive her," I tell him when he takes a seat.

"I would love to drive her," Embry looks over at me with a devilish grin.

I roll my eyes as I start the car, clicking the lap belt around myself before pulling out onto the main road.

"I'm sorry I upset you earlier. You know, when you found me up there."

"I- I just thought that you were going to jump or fall. That I wouldn't be able to get to you in time. You shouldn't have been up there alone like that. It's dangerous. Anything could have happened. And if I hadn't shown up when I did," Embry pauses and shakes his head.

"God, I just wish you'd have let someone go with you."

"I'm sorry. I really didn't think about it being dangerous. I just kind of ended up there. It was like something was pulling me to go. I promise, if I want to see that particular view of La Push again, I'll let someone know."

"You'll let _me_ know. Not just 'someone'."

With that command our conversation pauses for a couple of minutes, both of us lost in thought. Embry is the first to break the silence by giving me directions to the beach where the bonfire is being held.

I pull up next to a couple of other vehicles and Embry refuses to let me get out. He runs around the front end and is pulling my door open, offering me his hand. This is the second time he's opened a door for me and it surprises me just as much as it did the first. It's a sweet gesture and I catch myself before I reach up to kiss him on the cheek. That would probably be inappropriate for one friend to do to another.

Before I can argue with myself about it he leans in and brushes his lips across my cheek. His face is shaved smooth now and it feels different than it did last night. I kind of wish he'd left just a little bit of the scruff at least.

I sigh when he moves away from me, saying I should go down to the beach and he'll be there shortly.

As I walk toward the area where people are starting to gather, I see Rachel and Kim. They both wave me over and we take turns hugging when I make my way over to them. I see they are looking over my shoulder, in the direction that Embry went.

Rachel doesn't waste any time. "Funny thing - I get this text from Embry saying I don't have to wait for you. Don't get me wrong, I was okay with that. I was ready to go when he sent the text. I'm just a little curious though."

"Curious about what?" I ask even though I'm sure I'll regret it.

"How is it possible that you left my house to take pictures but you found Embry instead?"

"I did take pictures, thank you, Ms. Nosy. I was sitting on a cliff and Embry showed up."

"You were up there alone?" Kim's eyes go wide at that information.

"Not a good idea," Rachel supplies.

"Yeah, I know that _now_. Embry freaked out. He thought that I was going to jump," I cast them both a look of confusion. "Why would he think something like that?"

"Something happened a few years back and all of the guys are on edge about any of us being up there alone," Kim pats my arm gently. "But you didn't know so he can't exactly blame you for that."

"He made me promise not to go up there without him," I freely admit to them.

"He made you promise not to go up there without someone or without him specifically?" Rachel laughs as she says this. _What is _with_ her lately_?

"Him specifically. It was weird," I tell them while I replay the conversation in my head.

"Not really. He's just being protective," Kim smiles softly at me and then gasps, causing me to glance over my shoulder.

Emily and Sam have pulled up, both waving at us from the car. The girls and I walk over to help them out with their baby and kid gear.

I speak to Emily and open the back door, unbuckling Eli's car seat and pulling him out. He's smiling at me as soon as he realizes who I am. I smile just as brightly back at the little angel.

"Hey there, handsome boy. How are you today?" I place gentle kisses all over his soft little face. Emily and I laugh when he cackles out and I pass him over to her.

Before I can move too far I'm being attacked by Claire. She comes running at me, wrapping her arms around my legs. I lean down to kiss the top of her sweet scented head and hug her tightly, "You sure do look pretty today, little lady." I tell her and she grins and mutters a shy thank you. These two are so cute I can hardly stand it.

We walk over to an area where people have started placing blankets on the beach. I help Emily and Rachel spread out a tarp, then a blanket while Kim holds Eli. Claire and Sam have wandered off together to mingle. After we finish, I stand up to stretch and look around. It's evident that this is something they do often. I feel pretty honored to have been invited. It's just a small group, some I've already met, a few I haven't. As I look around, it quickly becomes obvious to me it's just the wolves and their partners. When the realization dawns on me my eyebrows shoot up. I open my mouth, ready to comment, but stop myself just in time. I don't want to get Rachel started on match making again.

Claire comes up and tugs on my hand, trying to gain my attention. "Will you chase me Ms. Lillah? No one else will play with me," Claire pouts and I look around at all of the people, doubting she'd be told 'no' by any of them.

"I would be delighted. We should probably move away from the bonfire though," I take her hand in my mine and move us away from the area we will be sitting around. I doubt any one would appreciate sand all over their blankets. "I'll count to three and then you go, okay?"

Claire nods at me seriously. The concentration on her little face is so cute I can't help but smile. I begin counting and Claire takes off like a shot when I get to three. I run extra slow, pretending not to be able to keep up with her.

"Claire, oh my goodness, you run _so fast_," I pant dramatically.

"I know!" she calls back to me over her shoulder. "Quil says that even he can't catch me. And he runs _real_ fast," Claire has paused and turned to face me, forgetting I'm not supposed to catch her.

I slow my pace even more, nearly running in place but my panting doesn't decrease in the least, "Well he sure is right. I can understand why no one else wanted to chase you. They were just scared you'd beat them."

"Yep," she shakes her head and purses her lips, "They are 'fraidy cats."

I stop and lean down to rest my hands on my knees, taking a few deep inhales that aren't needed, "Are you going to let me rest for a second?"

"NOPE!" Claire shouts and as if she finally realized she wasn't running anymore, takes off again.

This time I speed up, allowing her to stay just barely out of my reach. She's squealing and giggling wildly and it makes me laugh all the more. I reach out and scoop her up by the waist and bring us both down onto the sand where I begin to tickle her like mad.

Her laughter and pleads for me to stop only make me laugh harder. Finally I let her go because my ribs are hurting and I can't breathe anymore. Claire and I both fall flat on our backs on the sand, trying to catch our breath.

"You're so silly, Ms. Lillah," Claire finally says after she's able to speak between giggles.

I turn my head to look at her and she's looking right at me, our noses practically touching. I reach a hand up to touch a finger to the tip of her cute little button nose and laugh lightly. If my day ended right in this moment, I'd be perfectly content. I sigh and we lay there for a few more minutes before a high pitched whistle alerts us that the bonfire is about to begin.

-0-

Embry walks toward Claire and I as we are making our way over to the bonfire area. Her little hand is wrapped in mine and she's swinging our arms back and forth.

"Hey there, Claire Bear."

"Hi, Uncle Bry," Claire beams at Embry from beside me.

"Can I have a hug?"

Claire squints at him, looking like she's considering it. She looks up at me and smirks. I hold back a giggle and nod at her, "Mmm I _guess_ so," she finally acquiesces.

Embry throws his head back and laughs, then opens his arms wide. Claire giggles then launches her little body into Embry's waiting arms.

I stand back and watch Embry as he lifts her high into the air and then brings her back down. She wraps her tiny arms around his neck and smiles broadly while giving him a smacking kiss on the lips. Watching the two of them melts me into a puddle of goo. He's so cute with her. It makes my stomach flutter a little.

Embry looks at me and it makes my mouth go dry. He is smiling so happily that it reaches his eyes and they are sparkling and bright. I've never seen him like this before. I wish I could make him this happy myself.

"You two ready to go hang out with everyone?"

"Sure," I return Embry's thousand watt smile, placing my hand in his without him prompting me to.

He smile widens more, if that is possible, and we walk slowly back to the group. Claire is squealing because Embry has flipped her over his shoulder, hanging her upside down behind his back.

"Where'd Claire go?" Embry pretends to look around for her.

Hearing this, Claire starts giggling wildly and patting Embry on his back, "I'm right here Uncle Bry!"

"Claire? I hear you but I don't see you!" Embry says and winks while looking down at me. "Have you seen Claire, Lillah?"

"No, I haven't. I wonder where she could have gone off to." I join in on Embry's game.

The three of us stop in front of a picnic table where a few couples are sitting.

"Where's Claire, Embry?" Emily asks him. It's obvious to me that this is a frequent game they play. Eli is sitting in her lap, his little hands clapping excitedly.

"I have no idea, Em, she just disappeared," Embry tells Emily seriously, his voice full of concern. This sets Claire off, giggling and lightly pounding on Embry's back again. Her hair is hanging down and it's shaking wildly because she's laughing so hard.

Jacob comes walking over and stops next to Embry, "Dude, you have some sort of growth on your back."

"Really?" Embry swings right and left, trying to crane his neck so he can see what Jacob is talking about. "What is it?"

"It's the cutest growth ever," a male voice next to me makes me jump in surprise.

"QUUUUIL," Claire squeals and he steps around behind me to grab Claire from Embry's arms.

Quil takes her and places her on the ground so she's finally able to stand up right. He begins brushing her hair out of her face so he can see her, "Look how red her face is, Embry. You shouldn't do that," he frowns.

Embry looks at me and rolls his eyes. "Come on. Sit down," he tugs my hand and pulls me to a empty spot on the bench. After I'm settled next to Emily, Embry straddles the seat sideways, sitting as close as possible to me without being inappropriate. Quil takes Claire's hand in his and walks over to Billy and Sue.

There's a small spread of food on our table. Mostly grilled meats and chips, fruit, cans of soda and bottled water along with thermoses labeled 'coffee' and 'hot chocolate'.

Sam comes walking over from the teepee shaped platform of wood they'll light at sundown, "Hey Lillah, good to see you again. How's it going?"

"Great, Sam. Thanks for having me."

"Glad you came out," Sam smiles at me then winks as Emily stands so he can sit. After Sam gets settled, he places his hands on Emily's waist and pulls her down on to his lap. Eli peeks around Emily's shoulder and grins at Sam, who starts making faces at him.

"I'm excited to be here."

Embry leans forward and places his chin on my shoulder and I lean back against his chest.

Jacob comes walking around to the other side of the table. I nearly gasp when I see he's clasping the hand of the girl I saw on the beach with Embry earlier. The same girl I saw on Embry's back in Forks on Thursday.

"Lillah, this is Renesmee. She's a friend of Jacob's," Embry's breathe tickles against my cheek when he speaks.

I straighten up and smile at her. "Hi, I'm Lillah," I reach my hand out to shake the young girl's when she leans across the table. Her hand is hot in mine, which I find a little odd considering it's getting cool outside.

"It's nice to meet you, Lillah. I'm Ness," she's even more beautiful up close than what I'd seen through the lens of my camera. She has beautiful chocolate brown eyes with long lashes, pouty gloss covered lips and beautiful high cheekbones that are blushing naturally. Her skin looks like porcelain but I see again that there is no way she's from La Push. It dawns on me when she says the shortened form of her name, _this is Jacob's imprintee_. My eyes move from her to Jacob, he smiles at me and I smile back, hoping to convey that I won't be blabbing his secret.

The conversations continue around me as I process what I've just learned. Embry obviously has a strong connection with all of the imprintees. But I'm surprised by my reaction to that connection. I have no reason to be jealous, and yet, I am.

Every time I see how happy he is around them, I'm jealous that it isn't me making him happy. The fact that I assumed the worst just seeing him with Ness on Thursday and today, tells me way more than it should. Embry has the potential to completely break my heart, which would crush me. The more time I spend with him, especially the happy Embry, my Wolf Charming, the more I like him.

This could be a huge problem.

-0-

**A/N:** In case you aren't aware, we are participating in 2 great charity efforts. First, **Fics for Nashville**. Tara grew up in Nashville, so this is very close to her heart. For just a $5 donation to a charity of your choice, you can get tons of great fics, including one by us. For more info check out - community [dot] livejournal [dot] com / ficsfornash / .

Second, **Fandom Gives Back.** Last year Fandom Gives Back raised over $87,000 thanks to the generosity of Twilight fans. We have 2 selections available for this year, a _First Come First Serve_ of any canon wolf fic and an _Auction_ of Losing Control, including an outtake and a peek at our Losing Control master calendar. For more info check out www [dot] thefandomgivesback [dot] com.

This chapter was getting a little long so the bonfire is going to be split into two chapters. Next up, Embry's POV. It's a good one. You won't want to miss it.


	10. Chapter 10 Across That Line

**Chapter 10 "Across That Line"**

**Disclaimer:** We only own a few things. A "Gone with the Wind" blanket, a ton of N'Sync stuff, and Lillah, Carter and Eli. We definitely do not own Twilight or SM's characters. We just like to play with them.

**A/N:** Thank you to our amazing beta, Scooter (dailyicandy), who went way above and beyond the beta call of duty. She's off to Europe this week for vacation, but she and her mad beta skills worked ahead of schedule. Now, while she's trying to remember how to say "I'd like one in each color, please!" in Italian, the LC fans still get their weekly dose!

_Restless tonight  
Cause I wasted the light  
Between both these times  
I drew a really thin line  
It's nothing I planned  
And not that I can  
But you should be mine  
Across that line_ _  
_"One Thing" - Finger Eleven

**EPOV**

Lillah stops the Camaro in a parking spot in front of First Beach. I quickly jump out of the car as soon as she shuts it off. I'm trying to come to grips with her having two cars. It doesn't make sense. _What single person has two cars?_ My only answer is someone way out of my league. That's why we can only be friends. No matter how much it feels right to be around her, she comes from a completely different world.

Again, I remind myself, it isn't her fault fate had me imprint on her. I shouldn't punish her. With that thought in mind, I run to the other side of the Camaro, opening her door and helping her out.

Lillah blushes before taking my hand, "Thanks, Embry."

"Of course, why don't you head down to the beach? I need to grab a few things from my truck." I intend to just let go of her hand, but instead lean down and kiss her cheek, "I'll meet you down there shortly."

I watch her walk toward the beach, smiling when I see Rachel and Kim pull her towards them. Whether they know for sure or not, it's good to see them accept her so willingly into their group.

Jacob runs up to me then, punching me on the shoulder and wiggling his eyebrows, "Well, well, what have we here? I saw that little peck on the cheek. You are almost as chaste as Edward."

"Yep, this is why I hate you Jacob."

Jacob chuckles and follows me as I walk over to my truck. I pull a bag from the back of the truck, tugging clean jeans, boxers and a t-shirt out. "I need to change, you mind?"

"I've seen it all, but since you've apparently turned into a prude now that you've imprinted," Jacob turns his back to me before continuing, "I just wanted to thank you for switching off patrolling with me earlier. I wasn't expecting Ness to get here so early. And thanks for bringing her to me."

"Yeah, sure man, anytime. You know I love Ness; she's like a little sister to me. She's annoying and sometimes I want to strangle her, but I still love her and would do anything for her. Ok, all clear." I stuff the jeans I was wearing earlier into the now empty bag and toss it into the bed of the truck.

Jacob turns back to face me. I reach into the cab of the truck, pulling out the tarp and blankets I had placed in the passenger's seat this morning. I close the door and reach into the bed of the truck, pulling out a small cooler.

"Anyway man, thanks. So what _is_ going on with you and Lillah?"

"We are friends."

I know Jacob wants to know more, but truthfully, that's all I can say.

Jacob shrugs, "I guess that's progress, right?"

We head toward the beach, Jacob keeping an eye on me as we walk. When I drop the tarp to the ground, I finally respond, "I guess, progress, yeah. I just, I don't know. I want to push her away, because I know we can't be together. But the more time I spend with her, I want to glue her to my side. The more I learn about her, the more I like her. I mean, she's smart and funny, and gorgeous, definitely gorgeous."

Jacob helps me unfold the tarp, "Yeah, it sucks when you start to fall in love with them."

"What? No, that's not what I meant, Jake. Lillah and I are barely friends." I cover the tarp with a blanket and set the cooler on top of both.

Jacob nods in understanding, "I know you are just friends, but man, listen to yourself. Whether you like it or not, you are falling hard and fast for her."

Jacob grins wide then turns to find Ness. I want to yell and scream at Jacob, deny what he said. But the memory of Lillah on the cliffs today forces me to acknowledge that Jacob may not be too far off base in his assumption.

-0-

After Ness found me earlier this afternoon, she and I walked the beach for a time, looking for Jacob. When he didn't appear after ten minutes or so, I told her to wait on the beach. I phased quickly, reaching out to Jacob to let him know Ness had arrived early. When Jacob showed up, I agreed to take over his patrols so he could spend the afternoon with Ness.

It had been quiet on patrols. Unable to stop myself, I ran past Rachel's house, only to find it empty with no cars in the driveway. Figuring maybe Rachel and Lillah had left early for the bonfire, I continued on my way.

I could sense Sam was patrolling as well, covering for Seth who would be patrolling tonight during the bonfire, but he didn't say anything. I approached the cliffs, surprised how angry the sea seemed to be today, given that it was supposed to be a clear night. None of the guys were supposed to be cliff diving, but just in case, I lifted my eyes, planning to alert them to the danger below.

But there weren't any guys up there; instead I saw two tiny feet dangling off the edge, bouncing around. Looking further up, I saw beautiful red-gold hair blowing in the breeze.

I started running. My only thought being I had to get to her before she jumped. I had seen the images of Bella jumping off the cliffs too many times in Jacob's mind over the years. Images of that day flashed through my mind, but now, instead of Bella Swan, it was Lillah jumping off the cliffs.

Finally just steps away from her I phased back to human form, approaching her quickly, my hand reaching out for her shoulder. When I finally touched her, my fear only intensified. I just knew if I didn't take her from the edge quickly, I would lose her. Not aware of what I was saying, I reached out and wrapped my arms around her waist, lifting her to me.

And then I ran. As fast as I could as far from the cliffs as possible. I didn't stop until I felt safe deep in the forest. I set her down on her feet, but she was still unsteady and grasped my arms. I asked her if she was ok, but I was still so paranoid I didn't believe her when she said she was fine. I wanted to know why she was up there, what she was planning to do, but she wouldn't tell me, which just fueled my anger. I knew I was being short with her, but I couldn't stop myself. I was torn between wanting to shake the truth out of her and doing a thorough examination of her body to confirm that she was, indeed, fine.

But before I could do either, she noticed my tattoo, and was fascinated by it. She even asked to 'see' it, as I'm standing naked before her. When I reminded her of my state of undress, she gave me some privacy by turning around. Not that I wouldn't have gotten dressed with her watching, but it would have been much more difficult to accomplish.

I quickly pulled my jeans on before returning to our conversation. We actually were able to converse, her giggling at some of my jokes, before Sam approached. He had noticed I wasn't phased. I could tell the last image he had seen was Lillah on the cliffs, so he was naturally concerned. As was I, but for a very different reason.

-0-

The images my mind had created of Lillah jumping off the cliffs are still fresh. I see her now, smiling and giggling with the other ladies and I'm put at ease. But this still doesn't clear the worry.

The worry that I am, as Jacob put it, falling hard and fast for her. I was paranoid this afternoon, running only on adrenaline. When I reached her, I knew she wasn't going to jump; she was simply enjoying the beauty of the cliffs. But in my mind, I saw her jumping as a way to escape me. For her to leave me behind, as she found someone that was more suitable for her.

I wouldn't blame her if she did. But the more time I spend with her, like I told Jacob, the more I want her around. _I really am a selfish ass. _I know she deserves better, but I don't want to give her up. I want her by my side as much as possible. I'm looking forward to tonight, because once the bonfire starts, it's just going to be Lillah and me on the blanket.

When I look up again, I see Sam, Emily, Claire and Eli have arrived. Lillah, Rachel, and Kim run to help Sam and Emily with the kids. Emily and Lillah hug briefly, before Lillah reaches into the car, pulling Eli out. Little man is giggling and tugging at her hair. Lillah grins from ear-to-ear, dropping kisses all over Eli's face before placing him in Emily's waiting arms.

As they walk around the car, Claire is out as well. She runs up to Lillah and hugs her tight. Lillah leans down and places a small kiss on the top of Claire's head. I'm surprised, but not shocked, by how well accepted Lillah is already.

But seeing her with Eli and Claire might be my undoing. I know the plan is to just be friends, maybe friends with benefits, but the sight of her holding Eli while Claire latches on to her legs hurts my heart. I want that to be _our_ kids, giggling when Lillah picks them up, or hugging her tightly when she returns home. She shouldn't be borrowing other kids; she should be the mother of my children.

But that won't happen in the current situation. Even as I'm fighting to stay in control by being friends, I'm still slowly losing control. She keeps eating at me. Every time I give her a little more, she digs in deeper. I just don't know what to do.

As Lillah helps Emily set up their blanket, I move over to the grill to help Jacob and Jared.

"Hey guys, how can I help?"

Jared points to the table, "Grab one of those tin foil containers, the burgers are ready."

Reaching for the container, I see Lillah chasing Claire along the beach. This is one of Claire's favorite games, and I can tell she loves having someone new to play with. I turn back, handing the container to Jared, "Hey, Jake, where'd Ness go?"

"She's helping Sue to bring Dad down."

"Oh, ok. Well, when she gets back, bring her around, I want to introduce her to Lillah. But remind her to keep her mouth shut about Lillah and the imprinting thing."

"Sure sure, no problem. Do me a favor, remind Lillah of the same with Ness." I nod in agreement.

Jacob gives a loud whistle to indicate dinner is ready. I turn to see Claire and Lillah on the beach, flat on their backs. Lillah brushes her finger across Claire's nose and I'm over come. _That should be our daughter she's playing with._ I shake my head, trying to get control of my wayward mind. Lillah can barely stand me, why would I ever think she would be interested in anything more than being friends.

"I'll be right back," I tell Jared and Jacob as I start walking towards Claire and Lillah.

Claire is reluctant to give me a hug when I approach, but finally gives in when Lillah gives her 'approval'. I toss Claire over my shoulder and start walking back, surprised when Lillah grabs my hand. So far I've been the one to initiate things. I like having her feel comfortable enough to reach out to me.

We tease Claire, Lillah easily joining in on our little game, as we walk back. Emily joins in as well once we approach the picnic tables. Of course, as soon as Quil finds us, he lays into me about all the blood rushing to her head. This is a common theme; Quil is still freaked over the 'near' dropping incident of a few years ago.

I walk Lillah around to sit on the bench next to Emily, and then straddle the bench next to her. I'm desperate to pull her against me, but settle for being as close as possible without actually touching her. Sam joins us then, pulling Emily into his lap as I want to do with Lillah. I appease my need to touch her by resting my chin on her shoulder. She leans into my chest and it takes all of my will power not to pull her flush against me.

When Jacob comes around, I can feel Lillah's pulse quicken and I hear her sharp intake of breath. But she isn't looking at Jacob. Her eyes are locked on Ness, almost like she's recognizes her, but I don't know how that can be. I introduce her to Ness, keeping my voice even and low, trying to soothe her.

As Lillah shakes hands with Ness, I realize I forgot to mention to Lillah about keeping Jacob's secret. But I see Jacob nod at Lillah, almost in appreciation, so she must have given him some sign. We talk for a few more minutes before my stomach starts grumbling.

"Why don't we grab some food and move over to sit with Rachel and Kim?" I stand up, offering my hand to Lillah.

"Oh, ok. I'm not really that hungry, but you can eat." Lillah reaches for a water bottle, "You want something to drink?"

I grab two plates and pile hamburgers, hot dogs, grilled chicken, vegetables, chips and fruit on both, "Water is fine. Mind grabbing a couple of forks and some napkins?"

She grabs the water, utensils and napkins and follows me, "Embry, I hope you are planning to eat all of that, I'm really not _that _hungry."

I set the plates down at the table, grinning at Paul and Jared as we sit. Rachel and Lillah are sitting on the inside of the bench, while Paul and I are on the outside. Jared and Kim are sitting on the opposite bench. As I get settled, I pull her against me, leaning down to whisper just for her to hear, "You eat what you would like, I'll eat the rest. Please, just eat something. I don't want you starving later."

She grumbles something about "pushy" and I laugh, digging in to the first hamburger on the plate in front of me, while Lillah stabs a strawberry with her fork.

Jacob and Ness join us a few minutes later. I nearly choke with laughter when I see Jacob has two plates as well and is forcing Ness to eat off of his plates. _What is it about these women? They are so stubborn._

As Ness is nibbling on a hamburger, she turns to me, "Embry, Jacob tells me I have you to thank for the extra quality time I got with my best friend last week."

"Oh, it was nothing, glad to help."

Rachel joins in the conversation, "Don't let him be so modest, Ness. Apparently Embry was feeling very generous with his time last week. He covered patrols for both Jacob and Sam."

Ness's eyebrows rise in surprise at Rachel's statement, "Really? Don't you usually have late night patrols? When did you sleep last week?"

"I think he was trying to avoid sleeping last week, Ness," Jacob mutters, but its clear enough for the entire table to hear.

"Shut up, Jacob."

But I can tell this has caught Lillah's attention. She turns to me, "Why were you avoiding sleeping last week?"

I cut up some chicken and put it on the plate closer to her, "No reason, here, try some of this chicken, it's delicious."

"I was just wondering, Embry, are you going to be taking over his patrols this week?" Ness interrupts us, thankfully.

Before I can respond, Lillah jumps in, "When are Jacob's normal patrols?"

"Typically in the early afternoon until evening, sunset or so." Rachel happily supplies the information.

I respond back to Ness finally, "We'll see Ness, I'm not sure yet."

I glance over at Lillah. She seems to be puzzling over something, chewing slowly on the chicken. She looks up at me and smiles sweetly, "What are you looking at?"

"Nothing, just glad to see you eating. Hey, can I ask you something?"

Lillah lifts one eyebrow in surprise, "Uh, sure."

"Why did you come here, to the Reservation, last week?"

Lillah tilts her head in question, "Rachel didn't tell you?"

"Hey! I can keep a secret!" Rachel grins.

Paul shrugs, jumping into the conversation, "Not often, but every now and then my woman can keep her mouth shut."

"So," Lillah turns from Paul to look back at me when I speak, "why did you come here?"

"Rachel set up a meeting for me with Billy. I want to bring my class out here to learn about the local history."

Paul chuckles, "Sorry, Lillah, guess I messed that up for you."

Rolling my eyes at Paul, I lean down and whisper to Lillah, "Would you like for me to reschedule that for you?"

Lillah nods, smiling, "Yeah, that would be great. Thanks, Embry."

The remainder of the conversation is light, everyone joking around and laughing. Lillah seems comfortable around my _family_, which is nice. As the sun finally sets over the ocean, Jared gets up to help Sam light the bonfire. Once it's safe, we all throw away our trash and head over to our respective blankets. Lillah hesitates for a moment, before I offer her my hand, "You are my guest, you can sit with me, unless you really want to sit with Rachel. But I will warn you, she and Paul get frisky under their blankets."

Lillah grabs my hand and follows me, her eyes wide as we pass Paul and Rachel. I intentionally set us a few spots away from those two. On our right is Jared and Kim's blanket; on our left are Sam and Emily. Claire is curled up on a blanket with Quil, while Eli plays happily with Emily. As I get our stuff situated, Lillah sits on the edge of our blanket, talking with Emily and reaching out to touch Eli.

I sit down next to Lillah and Eli giggles, reaching out for me. Emily sighs, picking up Eli and handing him over to me. Emily turns to Lillah, "Do you mind keeping an eye on those two? Embry has a tendency to drop babies. I'm going to help Sam finish cleaning up so we can get to cuddling." Emily giggles then continues on, "Eli might fall asleep before I get back, if he does, just put him in his car seat and cover him with his blanket."

Lillah nods at these instructions; as I scoot towards the middle of the blanket with Eli. Lillah scoots closer, sitting opposite me, her back to the fire. Eli is sitting in my lap, reaching for Lillah's hair. She laughs then looks up at me, "You drop babies?"

"Almost and it was just one time. Emily and Quil over-exaggerate. It was a few years ago, I was playing airplane with Claire and _nearly_ dropped her. Ever since then, Emily won't let me babysit without supervision. I guess she thinks you are adequate supervision." I wink at Lillah, trying to keep the atmosphere light.

Lillah looks over her shoulder to Quil and Claire. "Emily told me the other night that Claire is Quil's imprintee. How does that work? She's so young."

"From what I've been told," I clear my throat, not wanting to give away too much, "the wolf adjusts to the needs of his imprintee. So, right now, Claire needs to feel special and well loved, especially since Eli joined Sam and Emily. Quil has been spending a lot of one-on-one time with her lately. As she gets older, like with Ness, Quil will be more like a best friend, a confidant for her. When she is ready, and only when she is ready, they will transition into the more traditional wolf/imprintee relationship."

Eli is starting to fall asleep in my lap and he whimpers, reaching out for Lillah. "Do you mind?" Lillah asks as she reaches for Eli. I happily hand him over, watching as he settles in her lap. I can't resist, I grab a blanket, and then tug Lillah until her back is to my chest, my legs on either side of her. As Eli's eyes close, I wrap a blanket around Lillah's legs and arms, making sure Eli is covered up.

Lillah leans back against my chest, sighing contentedly. It's easy to imagine Eli as our baby, but I force those images to the back of my mind, choosing instead to just enjoy the moment. I rub my hands over her shoulders, gently massaging, slowly moving up her neck. I massage her scalp before twirling her silky strands around my fingers. In the fire light, her hair blends in; looking like it's an extension of the fire.

Lillah's eyes pop open and she whispers, not wanting to wake Eli, "Ok, what is the deal with your being so hot?"

I suppress a chuckle, "I don't know, what's the deal with you being so hot? By the way, you look lovely today. I forgot to mention that earlier."

Lillah leans forward and turns her head to look me in the eye. She doesn't say anything just looks at me, which makes me a little uncomfortable, "What?"

"Do you really mean that?" Lillah blushes before turning back around.

I reach for Lillah's chin, pulling her face back toward mine. I'm unable to resist brushing my lips over her soft lips. I want to lose myself in her, but remembering everyone around us I pull back. I continue to brush my thumb across her bottom lip, grinning when her tongue flicks over my thumb. "Yes, I meant that, Lillah. You are beautiful. And kind of adorable holding a sleeping baby."

She blushes bright red, looking down at my lips. She looks back up to my eyes before leaning forward, kissing the corner of my mouth then whispering, "Thank you. You aren't half bad yourself."

Lillah settles back against my chest. I return my hands to playing with her hair as she speaks again, "But that wasn't exactly what I meant. Your body temperature, it's like you are running a fever all the time."

"Oh, that." I laugh at the misunderstanding, "Sorry, I forget about it; it's a wolf thing. A natural defense against our enemies, the Cold One's. Their skin is hard and cold to the touch. All of us wolves' run a body temperature about ten degrees warmer than a normal human, around a hundred and eight or so."

Sam and Emily return then. Emily grins at us, reaching to take Eli from Lillah's arms, "He must really like you Lillah, Eli rarely falls asleep in people's arms."

Lillah sighs when Emily takes Eli from her, "He's a perfect baby, Emily."

Emily grins then looks over at me, raising an eyebrow. I shake my head. I know what she wants to ask, but I also know she won't embarrass Lillah. _Thank God._ Emily rolls her eyes, turning to get Eli settled in his car seat before snuggling up in Sam's arms.

Billy's booming voice can be heard above the crackle of the fire. "Welcome all. I hope you are all enjoying yourselves. Tonight I'm going to tell some of our older legends, the original tales since we have a new friend joining, Ms. Lillah Hunter. If you haven't met her, please, reach out to her. She is a lovely young lady and we are proud to have her join our little group."

Everyone around us claps, a few of the guys giving the wolf call while Rachel and Kim chant her name. Lillah's face once again turns bright red. She lifts her hand in acknowledgment, trying to settle the group down before turning her face into my chest, trying to hide her embarrassment.

I chuckle before bellowing out, "Shut up you idiots, you are embarrassing her. Billy, please, continue."

Billy starts his tale. Once the focus is off Lillah, she pulls her face out of my chest. I rest my head on her shoulder once again, whispering, "Are you thirsty? Rachel mentioned that wine is your favorite, I brought us a bottle, if you'd like some."

Lillah nods, focusing on what Billy is saying. I reach back for the cooler, tugging it closer. Lillah scoots forward, giving me room to pour us each a glass of wine. I hand her a glass and then raise my glass to toast, "To friendship?"

She nods then looks me in the eye, a small smile playing across her lips, "Yes, to friendship."

Lillah's attention returns to Billy's story. I don't like that she isn't sitting with me now. I move forward on the blanket, so I'm almost touching her. I set my drink down on the cooler and cross my legs. I reach over for her, easily lifting her up. I set her on one of my crossed thighs, her legs stretched out across my other thigh. Elevated on my thighs, we are almost face to face. Her eyes are wide and questioning. I shrug, grabbing my glass before placing a kiss on her neck, just below her ear, "You were too far away."

She sighs, leaning her head against my shoulder, "You confuse me, Embry. One minute you hate me, the next minute you are getting wine and telling me I'm beautiful."

"I don't hate you, and you are beautiful. I do wish you hadn't found out about us. You shouldn't have to be burdened with our secret. But, the more I learn, the more I think fate would have made you see us for what we are some other way if it hadn't happened last week."

Lillah nods once then hesitates before asking, "Speaking of last week," she pauses again, almost like she is gathering her thoughts and her courage, "Why did everyone seem upset with you? I understand why they would be angry with Paul, but it seemed like they were mad at you too."

I'm surprised, "You noticed that? Wow, I guess you were more aware of what was going on than I gave you credit for." I set my drink down, reaching for the blanket, pulling it over her before wrapping my arms around her waist.

"Uh, well, I broke the rules when I took you away. I should have taken you straight to Billy or Sue." I'm honest, but cautious not to give too much away. I adjust Lillah on my lap, resting one hand on the swell of her hip. My other hand has a mind of its own, moving from her hip to run along the skin that is exposed between the bottom of her shirt and jacket and the top of her jeans.

"Oh. Why didn't you? Take me to Billy or Sue I mean?"

She's playing with my shirt, like she did last week. It's distracting, especially when I think of pulling my shirt off and letting her explore at will. I clear my throat, trying to stay focused, "I was worried Paul would see you and attack. I took you away so he couldn't see you. So you would be safe from him."

Lillah doesn't say anything. We are quiet, listening to Billy tell the tales of the tribe. My fingers gently brush her exposed skin. I know she is trying to stay focused on what Billy is saying, but the goose bumps I feel form across her skin give her away.

As Billy wraps up his stories, my roaming hand pushes under her shirt, loving the feel of the silky skin of her back against my fingers. After a few moments, I break the silence, remembering something I wanted to mention to her earlier this week. "Speaking of being safe, you need to be careful when you go on your runs. Those woods around your house are great hiding places for any kind of evil, human or otherwise."

She lets go of my shirt, lifting her head to look me straight in the eyes, "Ness said your normal patrols are late night. Rachel said Jacob's patrols are in the afternoon and early evening. When are Sam's patrols, normally?"

"Early morning, starting usually just before sunup, he takes over when I drop off." I shrug, confused by her questions.

She gasps then shakes her head, eyeing me, "It was you."

"What was me?"

"You were patrolling in the early mornings and in the afternoon. All week I felt like _something_ was watching me while I went on my runs. It was you. Why were you watching me Embry?" There is fire in her eyes, she's pissed at me.

I'm shocked she figured out it was me watching her this week. I can't believe she felt someone watching her and didn't tell anyone. "First of all, if you ever feel like someone is watching you, call me. I will be there as soon as possible. Second, I told you I would be watching. Now that you know our secret, it opens you up to danger you don't yet understand. Being around us, our smell will linger on you. The Cold Ones will smell it and attack. You are too vulnerable in Forks alone. Even if the coven up there is a bunch of 'vegetarians', it doesn't mean you are safe from 'friends' of theirs. So yeah, I took on extra patrols from Jake and Sam so I could watch you when you were most vulnerable."

She looks down after I finish speaking, a small "Oh" escaping her lips. A few moments later she looks back up, "I don't have your phone number."

"You didn't get texts from me this week?" I was surprised she hadn't responded, but assumed it was because she wasn't interested.

She shakes her head, then reaches for her purse, pulling her BlackBerry out, "I don't think so."

I hold my hand out, "Give it to me. I knew I should have put my number in here last Sunday when I had the chance."

"You went through my phone? Embry, that isn't cool!" Even though she's complaining, she hands over the phone.

I quickly program my number in, "I didn't go through your phone. I would never betray your trust like that. I just wanted your number. Plus I saw that Rachel was texting you like crazy."

"Now smile and pretend like you like me." I turn the phone around and snap a quick picture of the two of us. I can't help grinning when I review the photo, Lillah is looking at me instead of the camera, but there is a small smile on her face, which makes me grin. I quickly save the picture and hand the phone back back to her, not caring what I look like in the photo.

Lillah takes the phone from me, but she seems tense, like she's frustrated by something and not sure how to continue. I smirk, loving the look of concentration on her face, "Just say what's on your mind, Lillah."

"Rachel didn't ask you to bring me my jacket back. I asked her about it the other night, she didn't even know I had left it at the diner." She puts her phone back in her purse before looking up at me again, "Did you really find my jacket just by my scent? Do I smell that awful?"

I growl low, running my nose along the column of her neck, like I was dying to last weekend. When I reach her ear, I flick my tongue out, pulling her earlobe into my mouth. When I nip at her earlobe, a small moan escapes her lips.

"You smell amazing, like a bouquet of spring flowers. Your scent drives me insane, I swear it haunts me at night. When I was leaving the diner last week it hit me. It was faint, but it was you. I knew you had left, and I doubted you had returned so quickly. Then I saw the coat rack and I knew that had to be it. I'm sorry I lied about Rachel asking me to bring it over. I just didn't think you'd believe me if I told you I had found it. Can I ask you something?"

She seems surprised, but nods. I hesitate before asking, "Were you really dreaming of me?"

"I...um, yeah." Lillah blushes bright pink, the color I dream about every night. She tucks her head under my chin before mumbling, "Just about every night since last week."

I don't say anything. It kills me to think she has been tortured even half as much as I have been by dreams. Maybe I'm not being so selfish after all by us being friends. Maybe we both need this. Maybe I really am just being what my imprintee needs right now.

Lillah slowly exhales then looks up at me, "What changed? Between Wednesday when you wanted to kill me and Friday when you were...um, making out with me?" Her hand reaches up, lightly rubbing against the faint pink marks still on her face from my stubble last night.

I move my hand from her hip to covers hers on her face, then I pull both our hands away from her face to rest in her lap. I place small kisses along the burn marks, "I'm sorry about scratching your beautiful skin. I knew better than to kiss you with all that stubble, but I couldn't resist. You were too tempting to me last night and I've been so exhausted this week, I just didn't have the energy to shave."

"I- I didn't mind." She blushes bright pink again and I chuckle. She pulls her hand out of mine and cups my face, "I kind of...like a little stubble." Lillah looks down at my lips before returning her gaze to my eyes, "You didn't answer my question."

I raise my eyebrows at her admission. I can tell by her color she normally doesn't say things like this. I still can't believe someone hasn't scooped her up yet. But the thought of her saying something like this to anyone else nearly sends me into a rage. She should only tell _me_ what she likes and doesn't like.

I close my eyes._ I can't tell her that what changed was I realized I can't undo an imprinting. That I can't ignore an imprinting. That I can't be with anyone else now that I've imprinted on her. Even if I were to accept her as my imprintee at some point, that couldn't be now. She isn't ready to hear that. Hell, she just found out about all of this a week ago. She and I are just now getting comfortable with one another. I couldn't throw this on her. And I don't want to. She is too good for me, I know she deserves better. I won't ever tell her, because I'm sure there is someone out there that deserves her more than I do. Selfishly, I hope he never shows up. But until he does, I want to spend every moment with her that I can._

She is still cupping my face when I open my eyes, her fingers sliding back and forth over my cheek. I exhale and try to explain, "I never wanted to kill you, Lillah. Wednesday was difficult for me, and seeing you dressed like that, it sent me over the edge. Then you stood up to me, pointing out that you had figured out my name. It's silly, really. Anyway, I destroyed my clothes that day, I was so upset over the whole situation that I phased as soon as I hit the woods, not even bothering to remove my clothes."

She gasps "Oh" again and I'm surprised. "What?"

"Nothing, that just explains a few things, primarily why you were...not clothed this afternoon. I'm guessing you were so worried that you just...phased back to human form? That's still weird to think about. Please, continue."

I laugh, "It gets easier to deal with, I promise. When you are ready to handle it, I'll phase in front of you, which will make it a little less...weird, hopefully."

Lillah smiles wide, "You would really phase in front of me? I want to see that soon. But back to what changed."

"You are a pushy one. Fine, what changed. I never hated you or wanted to kill you, I just didn't like that you knew. Like I said last week, you are an outsider. But then, now that you knew our secret, you would also be in danger. I was torn, wanting to protect you, but mad that I even had to in the first place."

The hand that had been exploring her back has moved to her side, my fingers approaching the sides of her breasts. She inhales sharply when my fingers lightly graze her nipple. My other hand moves from her lap to slide along the outside of her jean covered thigh.

"Anyway, basically what changed was after explaining everything to the guys, individually, they all told me it would be easier to protect you if we were friends, if I didn't fight wanting to be around you. And I do, want to be around you. As much as I was upset that you found out, I do like you, Lillah. You are smart, beautiful, and funny."

I laugh sardonically as I give her a bit of complete honesty, "I don't know why someone way better than me hasn't scooped you up yet."

Lillah smiles softly. I can see a few tears threatening to spill over, but she blinks them away. She is choked up when she responds, "I...I like you too, Embry. And you are wrong, it's you who is way too good for me. You sure do know how to stroke a girl's ego. I bet the women you date just throw themselves at you."

I'm surprised by this, mumbling under my breath, "Rachel talks way too fucking much."

Lillah's eyes go wide at this statement. "What?"

"I just mean, Rachel talks way too much. Yes, I have dated a few women over the years, but I'm not seeing anyone currently. Well, other than the beautiful woman I see right in front of me now." I grin, hoping this will relax Lillah.

She smiles sweetly then pulls her bottom lip into her mouth, thinking. I give her a moment to think through whatever her next question will be. While she's pondering, I'm proud of myself for resisting the urge to kiss her, to get her teeth to release that lip so I can suck it into my mouth. However, my hands are still wandering her body, the fingers on her thighs inching over a little more with each pass along her thigh.

"Um...I know we are friends, but, just in case something were to change...since you've dated women in the past...um...have you been tested?"

I do my best to contain my laughter, "My God, what did they tell you? That I'm some kind of wolf whore? Yes, I'm clean. I always use protection. But really, don't believe the rumors."

Lillah again blushes, "Yeah, but, what about the mind sharing. Wouldn't the other guys know about, your, um...?"

"For the most part, I don't share a lot with the other guys. I'm a pretty private person and I'm usually able to control my thoughts, even in wolf form."

I'm trying not to laugh, but I'm surprised by how much she knows, or thinks she knows, about me already. She must have been really pumping the other ladies for information. Which is surprising, because Emily, Kim, and Rachel didn't tell me any of this. _Guess they are keeping some secrets themselves._

"What about you?"

Lillah's head shoots up at this question, "Huh?"

"What about you, have you been tested?" Before I can finish my question, she is already turning bright pink.

"Um, yeah, totally clean, no worries." She looks away. I wonder what she is hiding, but decide now isn't the time to press that topic.

I take a moment to look around at the other couples. I can tell everyone is lost in their little worlds. Lillah yawns against my neck. "Are you ready to go home?"

"No, I love it here, I want to stay as long as possible." I would believe this but she yawns again. I move the cooler back to the corner of the blanket. I pull Lillah off my lap. She frowns, but smiles again when I lay on my side, stretched out. I pull the blanket up that had covered just her, opening it as an invitation. She quickly scoots under the blanket. I roll over onto my back, so she can rest her head on my chest.

Lillah curls up against my side. I can't resist the need to feel her silky skin again. I pull her up just a little, so half of her body is against mine. I feel her nipple pucker against my chest and I groan. I slide my hand under her shirt, unhooking her bra like I wanted to last night. She lifts her head to look me in the eye, "What are you doing? Everyone will see."

"Trust me, no one is paying attention to us." I slowly move my hands back out from under her shirt, then make the same trip back up, this time pushing her shirt and bra up with my hands.

When I cup her breasts again in my hands, it sounds like Lillah is purring. Lillah glances at me then whispers against my chest, "Can I- I want to- touch you- please?"

Pushing back from her slightly, I quickly pull my own shirt off, then, looking around to make sure no one is watching, I tug her jacket, shirt and bra off too. I push Lillah until she is on her back, then pull the blanket up over my shoulders while I hover over her. Careful not to put my weight on her, I rest my elbows on either side of her head before sinking lower until the top half of our bodies are flush with one another.

Lillah moans against my throat, pushing her chest up to meet mine. I slide my hands into her hair, tugging her face until she looks at me. "Never doubt how beautiful you are, Lillah," I whisper before pressing my lips against hers again.

She is not shy tonight, sliding her hands down between our bodies, as her lips mirror mine. I slide my tongue into her now open mouth. Her tongue eagerly flicks against mine.

I break our kiss, her nipples against my skin too much of a temptation. I need to taste all of her that I can. I kiss down her jaw, over her neck and chest until I reach her amazing breasts. She whimpers when I pause to appreciate their beauty, "Embry, please."

"Please what, Lillah? Tell me what you want."

She opens her eyes, her skin pink when she speaks softly, "Your mouth- oh, God, you know- um, on my- breast."

"As you wish," I lean forward again, taking one nipple into my mouth. Her hands grip my hair, pushing me down further on her breast. I reach for her other nipple with my hand, rolling that peak between my fingers as I tease the nipple in my mouth. I suck it further into my mouth then swirl my tongue around it, which makes Lillah purr some more. When I gently press my teeth down, Lillah jerks her chest up off the blanket, moaning deep in her chest.

I let her tug me back up to her lips by my hair. My tongue is once again playing against hers when I hear a throat clearing. It's Billy, "The fire is dying down, I recommend you take the children home that have passed out and move whatever you are doing to your bedroom. Good night all."

I chuckle at Billy's message. I would feel embarrassed, but I know Paul and Rachel have done way more than what Lillah and I were just doing. Hell, they are probably fucking right now.

Of course, Lillah doesn't know this. "Do you think Billy knew?" She is trying to calm down, but her chest is still pressed to mine. Every time she takes a breath, her breasts are teasing me.

"No, Billy didn't know," I reassure her before quickly reaching for her shirt and jacket, tugging them back over her head. I slide her bra into my pocket before pulling my shirt over my head. I help her to stand up, wrapping the blanket around her while I clean up. Quickly folding the tarp back up, I toss it over my arm and pick up the cooler. I look at Lillah and realize, now that the sexual energy has left her, she is yawning again, barely able to keep her eyes open.

I pull Lillah against me, waving to a few of the guys. I don't tell anyone bye, just wave. My focus is on getting Lillah home before she passes out. "How about I give you a ride home? I can bring you your car in the morning."

Lillah digs in her purse and hands me a set of keys, "You've been nice, you can drive Candy and me home."

I help Lillah to the car, tucking her in the passenger seat of her Camaro. I put the tarp and blanket in my truck, then put the cooler in the truck's bed. Returning to the Camaro, I push the driver's seat back as far as I can then slide into 'Candy'.

Lillah mumbles sleepily, "You do know how to drive a stick, right?"

"No worries, I know how to handle a stick," I grin as I pull us out of the parking lot towards her home. I have to bite my tongue to keep from saying something crude. Lillah leans her head against my shoulder, wrapping her hands around my arm as I drive towards her house.

As I pull up to her house, I look up at the visor and realize there is a garage door opener up there. Crossing my fingers, I push the button. Automatically, one of the doors starts opening. I pull the Camaro in, glad the light isn't too bright in here. I move Lillah's head from my shoulder before sliding out of the car. I push the button on the remote again and the garage door closes.

Walking around to the passenger's side, I easily pull Lillah into my arms. I walk toward what I hope is an open door to the house. Thankfully, it is, and I walk into the kitchen I saw last weekend. Heading toward the living room, I walk down the small hallway instead, which I'm guessing leads to Lillah's room, based on what I saw last week.

I gently place her on the bed. I intend to leave, phase and run to my truck, but she moans my name. She's still sleeping, but I can tell she is about to wake up.

Making up my mind on the spot, I pull my sand covered t-shirt and jeans off. I reach for her jacket, t-shirt and jeans, easily tugging them off. I pull the covers back and tuck her in, trying not to pay attention to her bare tits and the lacy underwear that covers her lush ass. I slide under the covers easily. Lillah rolls over against me, sighing in my chest as she buries her nose against my shoulder. I wrap my arms around her waist and inhale her sweet scent.

I mean to only make sure she falls back asleep, but as soon as my head hits the pillow, the scent of her surrounding me, the feel of her soft body next to mine and my exhaustion from the week hit me. I'm gone before I even realize it.

-0-

**A/N:** It looks like our favorite stubborn-ass wolf is finally going to get a good night's sleep! We love to hear from our readers, so please click that little review button and let us know what you thought. We will reply back!


	11. Chapter 11 Holdin Me Tight

**Chapter 11**** "Holdin' Me Tight"**

**Disclaimer:**

**LPOV**

Sunday morning when I wake up there is something heavy holding me down so I can't move. I inhale sharply, startled, but then my lungs are filled with a familiar scent. _Embry_. He stayed all night; that thought makes a smile spread across my face. _He _stayed.

I begin to rehash last night in my mind. Going over every detail that I can remember. Embry was so sweet and accommodating. Making sure I had everything I could want or need. He went above and beyond anything I could have expected or have ever experienced.

I feel a little guilty that I wasn't really paying attention to Billy's legends but I hope I'll have many more chances to join in on bonfires. Any time I'm around Embry I'm constantly distracted. When he talks to me, there isn't anyone else I want to listen to. When he touches me I can't think straight. Truth be told, I _want_ him to distract me endlessly.

Waking up next to him is definitely high on my list of things I want to do more often. It feels nice, having him here in _my_ home, in _my_ bed. I feel a little bit more whole for some reason. He belongs here with me, even if he doesn't feel that way. I know it, deep down in my heart and I have to admit to myself, it's a little scary.

I was half asleep last night but I remember lying on his chest, his arms wrapped around me as I drifted off completely. Sometime during the night we wound up in a different position. He has an arm around my waist, beneath the covers and my back is to his chest. I'd like to roll over so I can face Embry and watch him while he sleeps but I'm reluctant to move. Knowing him and his reflexes and senses, I'm worried he'll wake up if I make the slightest movement. Our legs are tangled together and- _oh, my,_ I shift my hips just slightly and my suspicions are confirmed. Embry has an erection.

My face ignites, as, for some reason, I remember asking him if he's been tested. I can't believe that I'd just come out and ask someone that, much less someone that I am 'just friends' with. When he asked me in turn, I didn't really know how to respond. I don't know why I didn't think he'd want to have the same information about me. Of course, when I get my yearly exam they do blood work for that sort of thing but I've never really worried about it. Up until I found out that Carter was cheating, I didn't feel like it was even necessary for me to be tested, but I did it anyway.

I knew it wasn't possible for me to have anything, since Carter and I never had sex, but I needed to be sure, for my own sanity. I don't know if that is pathetic or smart, considering the circumstances. Of course, if he had anything, he could have shared it with me when we were fooling around or when he insisted I 'service' him, but those moments were few and far between, thankfully.

I just wasn't sure I wanted to tell Embry about my lack of experience yet, I don't know how he will respond. I'm worried it might be a little bit off putting. Not many guys would be interested in a girl with as little experience as I have, especially one that has had his pick of women.

Probably better to keep it to myself for right now. I don't even know that our friendship will progress into something serious enough for him to know. And I don't want it to be a huge 'thing' when we are together. I'd rather him not have it on his mind all the time.

And then there are the stories Rachel, Kim and Emily told me, about Embry being a "wolf whore". I don't know how I feel about being just another one of his women. I shake my head, clearing my thoughts about Embry with other women. I don't want to know about anyone else he's been with. I'm still shocked by how I reacted when I saw him with Ness, before I knew who she was, and when I saw him with Kim. The way he acts around them, touching, talking, smiling, laughing, is how the Embry of my dreams, my Wolf Charming, acts around me. Before Friday, it wasn't how real life Embry acted around me. I'm still expecting him to turn back into Mr. Cranky Pants any minute. It's like I'm going to wake up and this whole weekend will have been a cruel dream.

Embry's warm breath teasing the back of my neck causes me to shiver involuntarily. I realize as goose bumps appear all over my body that I'm wearing next to nothing. I'm in just my lace panties. No pants, no shirt, no bra. _Oh shit_.

Then he starts to stir. Nuzzling the hair away from the back of my neck and rubbing his hand up and down my stomach in slow strokes.

"Morning," his gruff voice says quietly in my ear.

When I say my own quiet 'morning' I can't help the slow grin that appears on my face. I'm sure he can hear it in my voice.

Embry runs his hand over my side and rests it on my hip, fingering the fabric of my panties. He rolls me over to face him and when I look into his face, I _want_ him. He's smiling sweetly and his eyes are dancing happily. He looks so relaxed and content. He has the most handsome face I've ever seen.

He leans forward and rubs his nose against mine before kissing it. We are so close now that it looks like he has multiple eyes. It makes me giggle and his smile broadens as the sound floats around the room. Embry pulls me closer by my waist, smushing our bodies together and my hands move to rest against the hot skin of his chest. He runs his hand up and down my back a few times before it lands on my hip again. We lie there for a few long seconds, neither of us speaking.

Embry finally breaks the silence when he shifts against me and we both acknowledge his hard-on trapped between our bodies. I gasp out a quiet moan and Embry hisses loudly.

"I'm sorry, Lillah. It's just...morning, you know."

He exhales slowly then a smile brightens his face, "Of course, you being in my arms this morning doesn't help."

This makes me laugh. First off, because he actually felt like he had to apologize for something that comes natural to his body. Secondly, because it kind of makes me giddy that he would even mention I contributed towards- _that_. It's another first for me.

Embry pretends to growl at my laughter and when he's not able to maintain it, he chuckles softly. I stare at him, marveling at how comfortable I am with him, even in this intimate position. I bite my bottom lip, considering, before I gather my nerve and move my hips against him.

"Woman," Embry sputters out when I rotate my hips a little.

He grips my hip and then his hand loosens and moves down my thigh, grabbing it and bringing it up over his hip. His sudden movement makes me lean my head back and stare at him wide eyed. I can feel him against my core now, he's long and hard. _He feels amazing. _I almost wish he'd flip me over onto my back and- _Do what_?

I place a kiss on his chest, right in the center before moving up to his neck. He's got me turned on again and I'm almost positive he can feel how wet I am through the thin barriers between us. I tell myself I am going to get into trouble and I really should stop but I don't want to. He's making me feel things I have never felt before. In the soft morning light I am allowing myself to enjoy this with him, even if I'm not really sure I believe him when he says he's erect because of me.

"Lillah, watch it," he tells me, his voice is rough and authoritative.

"Sorry," I say automatically before I can stop myself. It is a long existing habit of mine_. In the past, I felt like all I did was apologize - for not being sexy, for not giving Carter what he wanted, for not being what he wanted. For not being enough._

I pull away from him, trying to move my leg too but he doesn't release it.

"Stop apologizing," he tells me gently and I furrow my brow in confusion.

He runs his hand up my leg, over my hip and my side before cupping my face. "I'm just letting you know that my self control is lacking right now," he moves his hand from my face after he forces me to look at him. His hand moves down to one of my breasts and he runs the back of his fingers along my nipple.

"Will you let me kiss you?" he asks on a sigh and I snort.

"Really? You feel like you have to ask me that? I'm lying here almost naked, Embry. I'd think that would be all the answer you need."

"I didn't want to assume," he smiles cockily.

"Feel free to assume anytime. I won't ever mind being kissed by you," I blurt before I can stop myself.

Embry grins that same smile. He places his hand on the back of my neck and pulls me forward until our lips are barely touching. He smiles against my mouth and I roll my eyes. He's teasing me. When I don't think I can take it anymore and that I'll have to make the move myself, he finally moves his mouth against mine. It's a sweet, gentle kiss and it makes butterflies dance in my stomach.

I move my hands down to his abs where my fingers dance across his muscles. I can feel the muscles flexing beneath his smooth flesh and I can't help myself, I moan into his mouth. I'd really like to spend an entire day exploring him until I'm sated. If I could have him just once, I'd be happy. But maybe once I have him that way, I would only be hungry for more. Never full, always wanting.

His tongue softly caresses along my bottom lip and I open my mouth, allowing him access. We lay here, kissing slowly, wrapped in our warm cocoon for what seems like hours. I don't really know what time it is or how long we've been awake and I don't care. Nothing can touch me in this moment. Not worries about morning breath or leg stubble, body imperfections or how I compare to other women he's been with. It feels like the world stopped just for us. And I don't want it to start up again. I run my hands up his chest, to his shoulders and around his neck so I can tangle my hands in his hair.

I hear muffled sounds and feet hitting the stairs but I'm so focused on Embry I don't realize someone is lightly pecking at my bedroom door.

Embry sits up quickly, preparing to jump at our intruder but stops himself just in time. I grasp the covers that he's pulled off of my bare chest even though I know Angela's already realized that I'm not wearing a shirt. The look on her face says it all. She is standing in the doorway, her mouth hanging open and her eyes round as saucers. She gasps and mutters "Oh shit!".

_Oh shit_, indeed.

She is completely stunned. Not that I can blame her. I don't date. I don't spend time with men, even in a platonic way. So for me to have a man in my bed _is_ a little surprising.  
"I am so- so sorry, Lah," Angela stammers out before she turns her back. Before I have time to react to her she has closed the door tightly behind her. I stare at it for a second before looking back at Embry.

Embry flops back on the bed and runs a hand over his face. "I could have phased in front of her and taken her down without thinking twice about it."

I prop myself up on my elbow and turn to him so I can look into his eyes. He's worrying about something that didn't even happen.

"Embry, you didn't do anything. It's no big deal."

He rolls his head to the side to look at me, "I didn't even hear her coming. That never happens to me, to any of us, we are _always_ on alert."

"Mmm so does that mean that I'm such a great kisser that you were completely distracted?" I tease, trying to distract him. I don't want our moment to end just yet.

Embry's mouth opens and closes a few times before he is able to say anything.

He pulls me over to him so I'm lying half on his chest, "You distract me whenever I'm with you. With or without the kissing."

I place my face on his chest, trying to hide the blush of embarrassment I can feel surfacing. He laughs and runs the fingertips of one of his hands up my back soothingly.

"I should go," Embry says finally and drops his arm back on the bed.

"Oh, okay," I lift my head and nod but don't say anything. I want to beg him to stay but there is no way I'd ever use guilt or coercion to get him to stay.

"I'm sure you have plans for today."

"No, actually I don't," I assure him quickly, hoping it will make him hang out for a while longer.

He lays quietly for a few minutes before finally speaking again, "What if I run home, shower and change, run some errands and come back by later?"

I raise my head to look at him, "I'd like that. I could make dinner, if you wanted to stay?"

He smiles broadly at me. It's all the answer I really need.

-0-

After I walk Embry to the door and kiss him lightly I run back to my room to straighten up quickly. I don't waste time on a shower even though I desperately need one. My main concern is talking to Angie right now. I know she's not a gossip but I want to make sure she understands that Embry and I aren't 'together'. The last thing I need is for her parents to think I'm dating someone and then in turn, for them to tell mine. It would be a disaster. After my relationship with Carter ended they became more protective of me. Neither my mom nor dad would waste time in getting here to investigate further.

I walk upstairs and stand in front of her door for a minute before knocking lightly. I hear the faint sound of her voice telling me to come in. I open the door slowly and stick my head in.

"Ang?" I step in and finally see her; she's digging through her closet, pulling out clothes and then shoving them back in.

Angela spins around to face me, her cheeks flushed. I can tell she's still shocked by what she walked in on.

"Can we talk?" I ask her, hoping to get right to the point. I don't want to spend time making ridiculous small talk when we both know why I'm here in her room.

She walks over to the bed and sits down, patting the mattress in invitation, "Yeah, let's talk."

"I'm really sorry about all of that. I should have made sure the door was locked."

"What? No, Lillah, it's your room, in _your_ house. You are entitled to have a man here. I shouldn't have just barged in like that. I'm sorry."

"You don't need to apologize, Ang. You've never had to be worried about that before, I understand that. I think we needed to be stopped anyway. I don't know how far I'd have let things go otherwise," I wrinkle my brow in concentration when I realize how true my words are.

"So, who is he?" she asks. I can tell by the tone of her voice and the look on her face that she is unsure about asking questions.

"His name is Embry. He's a friend of Rachel's."

"I thought so, but then, I wasn't really sure. I didn't have time to study him. I was just trying to get out of there before I saw something else I didn't want to see."

I laugh at this and shake my head, "You wouldn't have seen anything. We were just kissing really."

She looks at me skeptically before asking, "Are you dating him?"

"Um, not exactly."

"What does 'not exactly' mean? You're either dating him, or you aren't." Angela looks worried now. I don't doubt she has a million thoughts running through her head right now. She doesn't get upset or defensive often but she looks like she's ready to do battle for me.

"We're friends."

"I'm sorry, Lillah but I don't have any friends that I do _that_ with," she smirks.

"It certainly looked like more than friends to me. I know you. You don't take things like that lightly," she leans forward and touches the back of my hand. "You wouldn't be laying in bed, naked and making out with just _anyone_."

"I wasn't naked, just shirtless," I giggle-snort when Angela rolls her eyes at how ridiculous my statement sounds. "I realize it's completely out of character for me, Ang. But there is something about him and I can't put my finger on it. We're just taking things slowly. Seeing where it goes. I like him, maybe more than I should. But for now, we _are_ just friends."

"Friends. Okay, if that's what you want to call it, fine," Angie looks smug and I choose to ignore her.

"It's just hard for me to define or explain. I just... _like_ him."

I pause and laugh, embarrassed when Angela says, "And it's obvious he likes _you_."

"He makes me feel good. He can be a jerk at times but he has his reasons. I feel comfortable and safe with him. He allows me to be myself when I'm with him. I've never had someone like that before." I tell her in broken sentences. I'm trying to explain as best I can but I'm having a hard time explaining something even I don't understand yet.

"I'm happy for you. Just don't let him hurt you like Assface did."

"Embry isn't Carter, Ang." I sit there thinking about the difference between Embry and Carter. I could probably create a long list of things in just a few minutes.

"Did he leave?" she asks me abruptly. I explain to her that he's going to come back later and I'm going to cook dinner. She just smiles and raises her eyebrows at me.

"You're making him dinner?"

"Mmm yes. He likes to eat, I like to cook," I shrug as if it's not a big deal.

"He's pretty hot," Angela surprises me by changing the subject.

I laugh because I can't help myself. Other than Rachel and the other imprintees I haven't been able to talk to anyone about this. Even with them I can't say too much because I don't want to allow them to figure out my feelings for Embry.

"He is pretty hot. But that isn't all he is. He's caring, sweet, protective- So much more than just 'hot'."

A slow smile starts to spread across Angela's face. "You like him. I mean, _really_ like him."

"I'm afraid I do, Ang." I look at her smiling face and I frown.

"That's a bad thing? Why do you think it is bad?"

"I don't know if we can be more than friends. In the end, he's meant to be with someone else."

"What? How do you know that? Did he say that? You are such an amazing person, Lillah. He should be honored to have you as a friend, as a lover. If he can't see that... well that's _his_ problem."

I shake my head when I see she's getting upset, "No, he didn't say anything like that. It's just, we are different. All of his friends, they are in relationships or married to women from the reservation," _with the exception of Jake_, I tell myself.

"So? Is there some unwritten rule of his that he can't date someone outside of his culture? That's just- stupid."

"No, it's nothing like that. There are just things," I pause taking a deep breath, "I'm sorry, I can't really tell you. He deserves to find his soul mate. That isn't me. But," I break away from her gaze and look down, "I'm happy to be friends with him until he finds that woman."

I hear Angie shift on the bed and then she's leaning into me, putting her arm around my shoulders, "You are such a martyr sometimes, Lillah. You need to allow yourself to be happy. If you can do that with Embry, then you should give it a try."

"I don't know. Maybe," I shrug and lean my head on her shoulder. I don't say anything more to her and she drops the subject altogether. Right now I just want to enjoy hanging out with her for a while. And later, when I can push Angela's thoughts from my mind, I'll bask in my Embry glow. _And try not to think about him imprinting on someone other than me._

We go downstairs and make a lunch of huge sandwiches before settling on the couch to watch a movie. She has plans later this afternoon to see Ben and bless her, says she wants to be out of the house before Embry shows up. But for now, she's all mine and I'm all hers. _I miss these moments with her. I don't think I'll have many more of them with her spending as much time at Ben's place as she has been._

After we finish our lunch and the movie ends I take our dishes into the kitchen and start cleaning up. Angela has gone upstairs to get ready for her 'date' with Ben. I'm digging around in the cupboards, trying to decide what to make for dinner when I hear a beeping sound. It's my BlackBerry, alerting me to new messages. I run to my room, hoping maybe it's Embry but it's not. It's a new email. Junk email, to be precise. I hit delete, throw my phone down and go back into the kitchen. I feel kind of stupid for expecting to hear from him so soon. He's only been gone for a few hours and he did say he had errands to run.

I make my dinner decisions then go back into my room. Angie sticks her head in my room, waving as she leaves and I tell her to say 'hi' to Ben for me. I grab my laptop and camera and place both on the bed before I begin downloading the pictures I took in the last week or so. Some are not so great, others I am completely in love with. There are a couple that I might be interested in enlarging and having framed. This area is so beautiful, green and lush. It doesn't take much to get a fantastic photo around here. I'd like to be able to pat myself on the back for my great shots but I know I'm not the reason they turned out so beautifully. When I get to the pictures I took up on the cliffs I squint so I can see one particular photo a little better. I grab my glasses and slip them on just to be sure I'm not seeing things.

There, just barely out of reach from my lens is a wolf. A grey one. It's Embry. It makes me smile when I see it. I mark it so I can remember to get it enlarged. Maybe I'll have a print framed for him as well. I go through the rest of the photos, deleting a few here and there but most get transferred to my external hard drive for safe keeping.

As I'm shutting my laptop down I hear my phone beep again. I almost don't check it, expecting it's probably another crappy spam email.

But it's not.

It's a text message from Embry. For the first time I see the picture he took of the two of us last night. His smile is so beautiful it makes my heart flutter even more. But I'm surprised to see that he wasn't looking at the camera, he was looking at me when he snapped the picture. We are looking at each other, smiling. Of course, I hate most pictures of myself, but this one isn't too bad, I almost feel pretty, maybe because of the way Embry is looking at me. _Not going to think about that right now._

I open up the text message and I'm not able to contain the little squeak that erupts.

_Do you want your bra back? ;)_

Even a text message from him has me blushing. Of course, it has a little bit to do with the content but mostly it's because it's him.

I reply quickly.

_Yes, please. But you have to hand deliver it._ :)

I notice after I hit send there is a whole chain of messages. I recall him mentioning sending other texts. I scroll down and realize the texts from the previously unknown number, a couple of the ones I _assumed _were from Carter, were in fact, from _Embry_.

_I need you._

_I miss you._

The first was from last Wednesday night, the day we insulted one another in the school parking lot and then he ran off into the woods after fixing Rachel's car. The day I was sure that he hated me he was sending me texts? The message itself is what the most surprising aspect is. _I need you_. What does that mean? Of course, I know what it means in most contexts, but it doesn't mean that is what he was saying with his message. A shiver skitters along my skin when I allow myself to think he could really mean it in a sexual way. _I need you too_, I think to myself while I run my fingers across the screen of my phone, touching the picture on display.

The second message is from Friday, after our under the bleachers make out session at the football game, and our dinner at the diner with Rachel and Paul. The day that, for me, changed it all. I remember receiving the message just as I'd pulled into my driveway that night and it makes me smile. He missed me after a few minutes of leaving my side. I'd missed him too but I was too excited knowing I would see him at the bonfire the next day.

I read the messages a few times over and the butterflies in my stomach grow and grow. I can't wait to see him again. Just a couple of hours left now.

_But that is when I realize, I might not make it out of this friendship with my heart still intact._

-0-

In my need to stay busy today I've managed to get two loads of laundry done plus clean my bedroom _and_ bathroom. Angie left just over an hour ago and I haven't stopped moving since I finished with my pictures. I'm surprised at how much I've accomplished, especially considering how many times I have to pull myself out of daydreams about Embry.

I still have a couple of hours to go before I can start dinner. I try to stay ahead with my lesson plans by working on them each day after school. Pulling out my books I start working on my plans for the next few weeks. Last night Embry offered to set up another meeting with Billy so I start making notes, a list of things I already know about the local history and a list of things I want to learn more about. Now that I know their secret I am determined to make sure we don't touch any of that information with my students. I feel protective of my new friends. I would happily do whatever I could to keep anyone from finding out about the wolves.

Aside from skipping over that, I think my students are going to be fascinated by the legends. I'm hoping Billy will be willing to host a story time with my sophomores when they reach their American Indian unit in a few weeks. There are some bright kids in my classes and a few of them have expressed interest in this particular subject. Of course, one thought leads to another and I begin to think about the bonfire again. I find myself remembering Embry's hands gently caressing me while I asked question after question.

_My skin felt so alive with his innocent touches; caresses on my stomach, my breasts. If I close my eyes I can still feel his hands on me, smell his distinct scent when he pulled me onto his lap. I don't ever remember feeling more comfortable than I did in that moment, cuddled up against him, feeling his arms around me. Then, as if the evening couldn't get any better, after catching me yawning, instead of pushing me to go home, Embry let me curl up against him. We were wrapped up in one another and a blanket, with Embry's hot hands caressing the skin on my back. I was amazed at how natural and right every touch from him felt, like he was made to touch me. He didn't make me feel unworthy or imperfect when he caressed me._

As right as it felt to have Embry touching me, I did gasp in surprise when he unhooked the clasp of my bra. Even though I wanted him to touch me more than anything, I was anxious too. My lack of experience, concerns he would be disappointed in what he found, and knowing that so many others were around us were all thoughts contributing to my anxiety in that moment. But the second he slipped his hands under my shirt, all those thoughts left my mind. He explored my skin until his broad palms and long fingers cupped one of my breasts, my pebbled nipple pressing against his warm flesh. There were words tumbling out of my mouth before I even realized I was telling him I wanted to feel him against me.

I shake my head, bring myself back to the present. I'm still surprised by how bold I was in that moment. It was completely out of character for me. All I can think is that I was under Embry's spell, so wrapped up in how he made me feel I didn't even realize I was asking him until the words were out of my mouth.

Needing to focus, I move on from the sophomore schedule to the A.P. senior's schedule. The next section for this class is the rise of the Catholic Church, its influence in everyday European life, including family planning. I'm taking down a few notes when I flash back to the sweet smell of Eli in my arms. When Eli started to whimper, I happily took him into my arms. Before I could get settled, Embry pulled me to his chest and wrapped Eli and I in a blanket. It felt right for me to relax against Embry while a baby fell asleep in my arms. My mind instantly started daydreaming about future bonfires, of holding mine and Embry's baby. __

WOAH. I can't go there, I tell myself. I slam my books closed, frustrated at myself. I'm so distracted by Embry I can't even focus on work. Putting everything away, I get back to cleaning. While the house doesn't need it, since I keep up during the week, I need to keep myself busy somehow until Embry returns. Which I hope is soon.

-0-

There's an insistent knocking at the front door and I dry my hands on the dish towel before walking into the hallway. I peek outside and nearly consider hiding before opening the door for Rachel to enter.

"What the hell took you so long?"

"Rach, you weren't waiting that long," I begin but she talks over me, following me as I walk back to the kitchen.

"I need deets about what happened with you and Embry last night. And don't say 'nothing' because I know better. Spill. Quickly, please. Paul thinks that I went to drop off something for Emily."

"Why would you have to lie to Paul about going to Emily's? You couldn't tell him you were coming here?"

"No. He'd have hidden my keys. Just like he hid my cell phone. He said I should leave you two alone," Rachel scoffs, muttering about Paul acting ridiculous.

I stare at Rachel for a second, expecting her to laugh and say that she's kidding. She doesn't. She is completely serious.

"Okay, if you must know, nothing happened."

"Liar! Come on, Lillah, tell me!"

"There is nothing to tell, Rach! What do you _think_ happened?"

Rachel leans toward me and squints her eyes, "I'm not stupid. I know what Paul and I do during bonfires. And you two had a blanket. It's a telltale sign."

"What_ever_. I was cold and Embry was just being nice-," I try to explain but she stops me once more.

"Oh no! Nuh uh, you aren't using that excuse. Been there, don't that. Spill. I have about twenty minutes before Paul starts getting worried. I told him I'd be back in an hour."

"We just talked. That's it. I mean, geez, what do you expect?" I cross my arms and glare at her.

"Not even a little groping? Don't tell me he's gone soft already. I never dreamed of the day when Embry wouldn't want to cop a feel," Rachel honestly looks shocked. She clucks her tongue and shakes her head as if she's saddened by the thought.

"He hasn't gone _soft_," I say softly before I can stop myself. My face immediately turns scorching red. Rachel definitely won't let that comment pass.

"What is that supposed to mean?" her eyes light up like a kid at Christmas time.

"We just, you know- he was a little turned on and he, oh my God I shouldn't be telling you this," I pause and tell myself if I give her a tiny bit of gossip, she'll leave. "There was 'groping' as you so tastefully put it."

"Mmm I love a little gratuitous groping every now and again. Paul and I do love bonfires," Rachel stares off in a daze.

"Ew, Rachel, I don't want to know."

Rachel rolls her eyes at me, "Don't be so modest, Lill. One of these days, I'm going to have you talking about oral sex under blankets during bonfires."

I turn my nose up in disgust, "Ew, you actually...do that to Paul? Don't you find it disgusting?"

Rachel grins wide, "I was actually talking about me receiving, but I definitely don't mind giving. Mmm. What's your aversion to giving?"

My mouth drops open as soon as her words register in my head. Well now I know what she and Paul were up to last night. I shudder and give her a look of mortification and then shake my head. "I just, don't enjoy it. Every time I tried with Carter, it was just, gross, and not a turn on at all."

"Hmph. Don't base your sexual knowledge on that idiot. Trust me, with these guys, giving is just as much of a turn on as receiving." Rachel glances quickly at her watch, "Shit, I'd better go. See you later!" She hugs me quickly and leaves me standing there, slack jawed.

_What the hell was that?_

-0-

After Rachel's sudden appearance and- disappearance, I go check on dinner once more. I'm hoping to take a quick shower before Embry shows up. As I'm checking on the chicken in the oven I hear a beeping from my phone. I finish my task then run to my bedroom to pick it up.

It's a text message from Embry. I'm almost scared to open it, expecting he's going to cancel on me. But he doesn't. He's just going to be late.

_Delayed by guys, be there in an hour or so_.

I send a quick reply back to him, letting him know I'm going to get cleaned up and to let himself in with the hide-a-key on the back porch.

Since I have a little extra time, I decide to relax in the bath instead of taking a shower. I go into the bathroom and turn on the water, testing it and adjusting the knobs until its warm enough. I throw in some scented bath salt and make a trip back into my bedroom. I pull a pair of pretty lace cheekies out of my dresser and grab a satiny knee length robe and carry them with me into the bathroom.

I lay my BlackBerry on the little stool that sits next to my bathtub and place a towel next to it. I pull my clothes off and throw them in my dirty laundry hamper before slowly stepping into the hot water and sliding down.

Just as I get settled and begin to relax my phone alerts me to a new message. I'm doubtful that it's Embry but I dry my hands off and pick it up just in case. It's Carter. This is getting to be ridiculous. Once again, I don't reply to him, although I'm tempted to, if only to tell him to stop contacting me. Instead, I return it to its spot on the bench.

I lay my head back against the porcelain of the tub, using the twist of my hair as a cushion for the back of my head.

I start thinking about this morning and what Angela walked in on. I've never accidentally walked in on her and Ben before. Probably because she always goes to Ben's since he lives alone. Leave it to me to be so thoughtless as to leave my bedroom door unlocked. Of course I'm not exactly used to having a man over and Embry had me so distracted I wasn't thinking clearly.

My thoughts drift from the look on Angie's face to what I'd been doing with Embry. I wonder what would have happened had she not walked in on us. I don't necessarily think we'd have gone as far as to have sex, but I know things would have progressed. I wanted him so much. His mouth on my mouth, his tongue dancing with mine. If that was any indication of what else he could do with that mouth, I want to feel it.

The past week has been so new to me. I've wanted things, imagined doing things I hadn't imagined doing with anyone before. I only want to feel those things with Embry. I want him to teach me things I've never done before. His hands on my body, touching and caressing me. I need his mouth on my breasts again, moving down my stomach to the juncture of my thighs. His eyes looking up at me in question before he places his mouth on my wet heat, sliding his tongue in and tasting me. I can hear him moan as he licks up my slit.

I don't realize that I'm sitting in my bathtub, fantasizing about Embry until the heat of the water and my body temperature rising makes me start to sweat a little. I tune back into my body and realize that my nipples are pebbled and my clit is starting to throb.

I chew on my bottom lip in thought, wondering if I should just take care of this issue. Maybe I should try touching myself the same way Embry did. My face flushes more at the idea. I don't know if I can do that with Embry coming over soon. What if he can tell? I know it's a ridiculous notion but with his senses being what they are, anything is possible. I move before I can debate with myself more and lose my nerve.

I move my hands to my breasts, mimicking Embry's hand movements from last night. I squeeze gently, testing the weight of them in my hands. They grow heavy and my nipples strain against my palms. I move my fingers so that I can pluck gently at my nipples. It's different from Embry's hands but it still sends shivers down my spine. I try pinching a little harder and when I do it sends sparks to my clit and I moan loudly, the sound echoing in the bathroom. I whisper Embry's name before I realize I'm even thinking it. This should be him touching me now.

I lift my head from its resting place against the back of the tub so I can study the movement of my hands. I repeat the previous action a few more times. Each time adjusting it just slightly to see what feels best, what I like most. Being with Embry last night and this morning showed me how much more I can feel if I just take things slow and gentle.

Carter was always rushing me, pulling at my shirt, sometimes tearing seams or popping buttons. He would shove his hand down my bra and squeeze my breasts a few times while pressing sloppy kisses on my mouth and neck. It was the furthest thing from sexy and it didn't turn me on in the least. He would get angry at me for not reacting the way he wanted or expected. He'd call me a frigid prude and we would argue until he would storm off. He'd come back by my dorm room hours later and be drunk as hell, demanding I take care of his 'issue'.

But Embry's touches were nothing like that. They weren't forced or rough. They were natural and gentle and everything and nothing like I expected.

Thinking about him and his hot mouth on my chest has me gasping. I need some sort of release, I want to explore a little bit further.

I slide my hands under the water and down my sides, lightly gliding my fingers along my skin until I shiver. My hands move to my stomach and then one of them slides down until its resting idly on one of my thighs. The other hand moves down to cup my sex and I run a finger up and down my lips a few times. I slip in one digit slowly, sighing and relaxing against the tub once more.

I bring my knees up, just barely peeking out of the water, so that my hand has easier access. I pull my finger out and then slip it back in, this time adding one more. I pause for a second, giving myself time to get used to it. My fingers are nothing compared to his but it feels nice. I can only imagine what his would feel like.

The hand resting on my thigh is gripping my skin like a vice. I loosen it and bring it to join the other hand. My thumb finds my clit and moves against it, pressing down. I cry out at the feeling of both stimulations. My fingers pull out slowly and then slide back in. I remove my other hand and bring it back up to one of my breasts. My nipples are puckered and aching and I need to feel more there.

I pull my hand between my legs back out and bring those same fingers up to circle around my clit. It feels like a raging fire is starting to burn through my body and I don't know how to put it out. Everything I do makes it burn stronger, like lava in my veins.

I'm so wet and achy and needy that I don't know what to do next. I continue my same pattern, but whimpers filled with need and want are tumbling from my lips over and over. In between my moans I say Embry's name. Imagining it's his fingers moving in and out of me, flicking my clit. His hands on my breast, squeezing and twisting my nipple between his fingers.

"Embry. Embry. Embry. Oh God, please."

A heavy hand drops on my shoulder and I gasp, my eyes flying open to meet a pair of dark ones.

_Embry_.

-0-

**A/N:** *ducks and runs*


	12. Chapter 12 Hanging By A Thread

**Chapter 12 "Hanging By A Thread"**

**Disclaimer:** Come on, we are focusing on the wolves here, of course we aren't SM. She'd much rather write about Bree than the hot men of the wolf pack. Bless her heart!

**A/N: **SQUEEEEE! "Losing Control" has been nominated for a Bring Me To Life Award in the Pawprint Category! We are so excited and proud of our little story that could. Please go vote for "Losing Control" at www(dot)bringmetolifeawards(dot)weebly(dot)com!

Also, we know we left you hanging at the end of Chapter 11. Good news, we have a whole chapter dedicated to what happens next. Bad news, that's Chapter 13. We first get to find out what Embry did with his day away from Lillah. Promise, it's worth the wait!

Finally, a BIG "WELCOME BACK" to our amazing beta dailyicandy! She has been missed, and not just because she's a fantastic beta!

_If you only knew  
__I'm hanging by a thread__  
The web I spin for you  
__If you only knew__  
I'd sacrifice my beating  
Heart before I lose you_  
"If You Only Knew" - Shinedown

**EPOV**

As soon as Lillah reluctantly closes the door on me, I dash to the woods, pulling off my clothes as quickly as possible before phasing. I run at a steady pace, the same words running over and over through my head: _I can't believe I stayed the night with her_.

I've never stayed the night with a woman. I've never fallen asleep with a woman wrapped in my arms. I've never just slept with a woman, no sex involved.

And yet, last night, I did all of those things, with Lillah. The kicker, I want to do it again. I pray she falls asleep in my arms tonight so I can carry her to bed and undress her like I did last night. I had the best sleep I've ever had in my life, even before the imprinting.

This morning, waking up to her tucked up against me was pure heaven. I just wanted to stay there, in her bed, kissing her all day long. Feeling her soft lips against mine, just kissing her slowly and gently, loving her, was enough for me.

Of course, my body wanted more. Before I even woke up I was reacting to her. When I pulled her against me, I knew she could feel how hard I was. I expected her to roll away, instead she moaned, causing my need for her to grow even more.

What surprised me most was how much she wanted me. When I hiked her leg over my hip, I could feel how wet she was. It took everything in me not to move my hand under the thin piece of lace covering her. When she started moving against me, kissing up my chest and, I'm pretty sure unconsciously, rubbing herself against my straining cock, I didn't want to stop her. I knew I would be rolling her over and burying myself in her without a second thought, if I didn't slow things down.

To distract us both I simply kissed her. It made me laugh that I was able to focus on just kissing when I knew she was practically naked. I could feel her nipples against my chest but I forced myself to focus on her lips. I didn't take long before my sole focus was Lillah's soft, sweet lips. My world narrowed to just the two of us, wrapped around each other, simply kissing.

And then the door to her bedroom opened and all I could think was I needed to protect Lillah. I can't believe I was so wrapped up in her that I couldn't even tell someone was approaching. I never lose focus like that. It's in our nature to be on alert at all times, to protect those around us, the people we- care for. I see Angela's shocked face clearly in my mind and I'm pissed with myself. I was ready to strike before I even knew who it was. Lillah can never know how close I was to phasing.

I was surprised how quick she was to reassure me; it was strange but also comforting. I was reminded of last week, never imagining that just seven days later Lillah would so readily support me, turning to me immediately just as I had seen Emily and Rachel do in the past for Sam and Paul. I'd expected fear or anger from her, knowing I might have hurt her cousin, but I saw only concern in her eyes.

My mind wanders forward to tonight. I'm daydreaming about how I'd like the night to progress, starting with where we left off this morning; naked expect for her panties and my boxers. Before I can dream of any more clothing being removed, Jacob interrupts my thoughts. I have no idea how long he's been in my head, but I'm guessing long enough to know I spent the night with Lillah.

He shows me a picture of Sam's house. He wants to meet me there. _Shit._ Just what I need, a pow-wow session with Sam and Jacob. But I can't ignore this; unfortunately, Jacob pulled rank on me, commanding me to show up, not as my friend but as my Alpha. _Fuck me_.

Thankfully Jacob didn't order me to show up _right now_. I decide to take my time getting to Sam's house, dreading what is to come. I know there will be both questions and disapproval waiting for me. Wanting to ignore the ass chewing I'm sure to get from Sam and Jacob, I ease my mind back to Lillah. I find myself relaxing at just the thought of her.

As I pass the beach, going out of my way to reach Sam's house, I'm reminded of Lillah playing with Claire yesterday. She looked so happy, laughing with Claire, playing along with her silly game. I could tell Lillah was having fun, which made me smile. While Claire doesn't have an aversion to strangers, she has lived a very sheltered life. But she readily accepted Lillah. _I wish it were as easy for me to accept her._

Later in the evening, when Lillah was holding Eli, well, she looked perfect. Lillah was made to be a mother. I could tell she loves children, her eyes lighting up at just the sight of Eli. Even more, I could tell kids love her in return. Seeing her holding Eli again in my head, I imagine it is our baby, the little girl I keep seeing in my daydreams; honey colored skin, auburn hair, and freckles across her nose, just like her mommy.

I shake myself from this daydream. Even if I were to accept her, that doesn't mean she would ever want to be with me, let alone have my kids. I need to just stop myself. I thought being friends would make it easier, but I'm finding it's just making it more complicated. Yes, the dreams that kept me up at night have stopped, but now I can't control my daydreams of her. In my daydreams I can see all the possibilities ahead of us. Of course, in daydreams we don't have all the shit to work through. Like the little problem of her ever wanting to be with someone like me. She deserves better than me, but in my daydreams, I'm all she ever wanted.

I exhale slowly. When I look around, I see I'm close to Sam's house. Before I approach, I phase back and pull on my jeans. When I walk into the kitchen through the back door I see Sam and Jacob are sitting at the table waiting for me.

I grab a cup of coffee before sitting. They both nod, Sam pointing to the food set out, "Dig in, I'm sure you're hungry."

I reluctantly fill a plate with bacon, eggs, and pancakes, turning to both of them, "What's going on that I had to be ordered here?"

"You missed your patrol shift overnight." Jacob isn't harsh when he says this, more surprised, concerned.

I look at Jacob, shocked this is the reason why I've been summoned. Even though Jacob doesn't sound upset, I'm still pissed, "Are you kidding me? Everyone misses patrols every now and then. What the fuck, I miss one patrol and I'm getting shit?"

"That's the thing, Embry. You've never missed a patrol. Not in all these years. Even when your mom was grounding you night after night in the beginning, you were still there." As Sam speaks, I can tell this isn't a bitch out session, it's more of an intervention. _What the fuck? They have no right to interfere in my relationship._

I finish off my food, pushing the plate away from me before I turn to both of them, "I was just exhausted last night. This week has been hell. Once my head hit the pillow, I was passed out. It won't happen again, don't worry."

Sam clears his throat, "Uh, actually it will happen again. I think you'll find yourself getting better sleep when you have Lillah beside you at night."

"How did you know-," I don't even finish the thought before Jacob is tapping his head. Of course, he saw all my uncontrolled thoughts this morning when he 'popped' in my head. This is getting worse and worse. Now I'm not only losing control of my life because of Lillah, I'm losing control of my thoughts.

"Plus, you left with Lillah last night in her car. When I was patrolling this morning, your truck was still at the beach." _Trust in Sam to pay attention to things like the fact my truck was at the beach still._

I hesitate before admitting, "Yeah, fine, I was at Lillah's, is that a crime? And what do you mean I'll get better sleep when Lillah's beside me?"

"No, definitely not a crime to want to be with your imprintee." Jacob offers quickly, before I can assume the worst.

Sam however is a little slower to respond, "Of course it's fine that you were at Lillah's, but Embry, don't forget, your duty is to protect this tribe, not _just_ Lillah. As for sleeping, well, you've had the dreams the past week or so, I'm assuming based on how grouchy you've been and how shitty you've looked lately. Those happen when your imprintee isn't near. When you have her in your arms, the dreams go away. There's no need to dream when you have the real thing there beside you."

I sigh at this information. I should have known. This whole imprinting thing gets worse and worse if you aren't around her. It's like I can only have peace when I'm with her. But with that peace, I'm completely losing control of everything around me. Lillah is going to completely control and ruin my life.

Jacob breaks into my thoughts, "Given how well rested you look, we'd like to offer a compromise. Sam and I have talked and we think this is a good solution for everyone involved."

I don't say anything as I wait for Jacob to continue. I'm worried, but at the same time, hopeful their solution means I can be with Lillah as much at night as she will allow. That thought scares the hell out of me. _I've never wanted to go back to a woman after spending time with her. She has me wrapped around her finger already and I've only spent one night next to her._

"If you are open to it, we'd like to recommend you switch patrol shifts with Seth. He's out of school now and starting to 'date'. Sue isn't happy about this, as you can guess. To help her with knowing where her son is late at night, he can take your shift. That way, he can patrol with Leah. Sue likes the idea of Leah being around to keep an eye on him late at night. You will take the afternoon shift with me. You'll be done by sunset most nights. Then you can spend your evening with your imprintee." Jacob grins, proud of himself for this solution.

Sam interjects before I can say anything, "Don't worry, we won't cut your hours at the shop. Instead of your normal nine to five, we will back up your time. You will open the shop at seven in the morning, but we will get you out by three for patrols."

I don't even know what to say. I look between Sam and Jacob. Neither one seems pissed, more concerned. That helps me to make my decision. I take a deep breath and release it loudly before answering, my resignation evident in my voice, "Yeah, I guess that works. I mean, if I won't lose hours at work. Have you talked to Seth?"

"Yeah, just a little while ago. He's all for it, of course." Jacob looks hopeful that I will agree.

"Fine, I'm in. When do I start?"

Jacob looks over at Sam and shrugs his shoulders, "This afternoon, if you'd like. Seth was planning to take on both shifts for you today. Since you took my shift last week I don't know that there is much for you to get caught up on. However, it would probably be good for you to bring Seth up to speed on your shift."

"Yeah, that's fine, but if it doesn't work out, I want my late night patrols back." I look between Sam and Jacob, trying to convey to them my uncertainty is not with the new time, but with my relationship with Lillah.

Sam chuckles at this, "What do you think is going to happen? Lillah kick you out? I doubt it, especially after the fun you two were having last night. You were rivaling Paul and Rachel for loudest couple."

"I don't know Sam, Embry and Lillah weren't 'loud' like Paul and Rachel, but they were under their blanket before anyone else, Dad was barely done with his stories." Jacob winks at me, "What were you two doing under that blanket anyway?"

"None of your damn business," I growl out, annoyed they know anything about what Lillah and I were doing last night. It doesn't matter to me how they found out, either by what they saw or heard last night or because Jacob was poking around in my mind earlier, it's not right that they know our business. _No one should hear or see her like that, no one but me._

Needing to calm down, I attempt to change the subject, looking back at Jacob, "Hey, mind asking Billy to call me sometime? Lillah came to the Rez last week to talk to him about a field trip. I'd like to make that up to her."

Jacob grins wide, "Sure sure. So did you continue the fun once you got to her house? Did you sleep with her?"

"Jacob, do you see how surly he is? If he had actually gotten any last night he'd be in a much better mood," Sam chuckles at himself, not knowing how close he is to the truth.

Jacob elbows Sam, "Is that why you are always in a bad mood? Because Emily holds out on you?"

"Are we done here?" I don't want to be a part of this conversation, especially discussing Sam and Emily having, or not having, sex.

Sam and Jacob bust out in laughter over my reaction. I shake my head as I move to place my dishes in the sink.

Sam speaks up before I can leave, "Embry, one more thing."

"Yeah, what's up, Sam?" My hand is on the door knob, ready to go.

"You might want to hide that bra in your back pocket. I don't think the other guys would let you go as long as Jacob and I did without giving you shit about it."

I roll my eyes, slamming the door behind me as I walk out.

-0-

I decide to walk to the beach to pick up my truck; I've got time to kill before I report for patrols. I don't have to patrol this afternoon, I know that, but I also don't want to seem too eager to return to Lillah. _Even though I am._ I'm dying to phase and run straight back to her house. I want to take her to our bedroom and make love to her all afternoon.

I pause mid-step, realizing that in my fantasy, I called her bedroom _our_ bedroom. I press my palms hard against my eyes, trying to force rational thought into my brain. But it isn't helping. Imprinting isn't about rationality. Imprinting is completely irrational, as I have experienced this past week. Normal people do not have fantasies about being married with one kid and another on the way a few hours after meeting someone. Then again, normal people don't change into giant wolves at will.

I start walking again, moving at a snail's pace. I pull her bra from my back pocket and finger the purple lace. Recalling last night and this morning makes me smile. Rational or not, this really has been the best twenty-four hours of my life, all because of her. Pulling my cell phone out, I send Lillah a quick text asking if she wants her bra back.

Before I approach the beach, I lean down to stuff the bra into the pouch around my ankle. Lillah's response pops up on my phone as I stand.

_Yes, please. But you have to hand deliver it. :)_

I'm grinning as I approach the truck, focused on the fact that she finally responded to one of my texts. I look up to unlock the door, surprised to see Paul sitting on the tail gate of the truck. "What are you doing here, man?" _What the hell is going on that the guys keep sneaking up on me?_

Paul is watching me closely, "You just now noticed I was here? You are so focused on, I'm guessing here, a text from your woman, and you didn't even sense someone was close?" Paul pauses briefly before grinning, "It's good to see you have a weakness. You aren't perfect all the time! Who knew?"

I'm completely shocked by this comment from Paul. I sit on the other side of the tail gate from him, wide eyed, "What do you mean I have a weakness?"

"Man, our imprintees...they give us strength but they also are our weakness. I can't tell you the number of times Rachel and I have been so engrossed in one another that we have no clue what is going on around us. But I'm sure you understand. I hear you and Lillah were giving Rachel and me a run for our money last night at the bonfire."

I decide to ignore the bonfire comment, focusing on the first part, "So, it's happened to you before? You've been so focused on Rachel that you don't know what is going on? Has someone ever...caught you?"

"Caught us? Many times! Hell Jacob walked in on us a few weeks ago. If I've told him once, I've told him a thousand times, call or text before you come over, but does he listen? Nope. We were in the living room, Jacob banged on the door a few times, or so he says. I didn't hear a damn thing. Rachel was doing this thing with her tongue," Paul stops when I glare at him. It's one thing to have to see the images of him and Rachel, another to get a play-by-play description.

Paul chuckles, "Fine, no details. Anyway, Rachel and I were so focused on each other; we didn't hear a damn thing until Jacob was barging in, screaming his head off at both of us. I know he knew what we were doing. I'm sure he could hear us, but he just had to prove a point."

Thinking back to this morning, I ask more hesitantly this time, "Have you ever been so surprised by someone walking in that you nearly phase and attack?"

"Uh, who are you talking to?" Paul grins and I can't help but to laugh with him, "Of course! I nearly attacked Billy a few days after I imprinted on Rachel. He came into her room one morning and I was not expecting it. That was the worst. But it got easier, especially after we moved in together."

Paul doesn't say anything, waiting for me to jump in. When I'm silent for a few minutes he finally crosses his arms, glaring at me, "So, do I get the story behind these questions? I'm sure it's a doozy, especially since your truck was here all night, you sly dog you! Did you fuck her all night long? Did you finally tell her she's your imprintee? Did you at least go down on her?"

"Shut the fuck up, asshole!" _Damnit!_ Apparently everyone knows I stayed the night with Lillah last night. I hate that they are assuming the worst about what happened last night. Needing to make sure he knows, I growl out, "Nothing happened."

Paul looks at me incredulously, "Really? Nothing? So you are just randomly asking me these questions after your truck was left here all night?"

"Nothing happened last night, we just fell asleep." I don't want to share the second part, but I know Paul won't leave me alone until he knows why I'm asking these questions. Exhaling, I continue, "Lillah and I were in her room this morning, just kissing, not that it's any of your business, and her cousin walked in. I didn't hear a thing until Lillah's cousin was screaming 'Oh shit!' I had no clue she was even close. When I finally realized she was there, my only thought was to protect Lillah. I came way too close to phasing in front of both of them," I shake my head at the memory.

Paul throws his head back, roaring in laughter, "Damn dude! You have to show me how that went down next time we are phased! That is classic!"

"Is there a point to you being here, other than to give me hell?" I'm hoping focusing him on why he actually searched me out will distract him from the story.

Paul stops laughing, but he still has a huge grin on his face, "Yep, just wanted to warn you. I'm fairly certain Rachel is over at Lillah's house right now, grilling her."

"What? I thought you were going to stop her from any further match making!" Paul and I had talked yesterday while we were setting up the bonfire about how Rachel needed to just stop, imprintee or not. He agreed with me, saying he would do his best.

"Hey, there's only so much I can do," Paul throws his hands up in the air. "You need to learn, these women don't play fair. She threatened to withhold...some things, from me, if I didn't give her back her keys. I already took her cell phone away! What more can I do? She should be back soon."

"Fuck! Do you think I should go check on Lillah? I really need to get going on my new patrol shift."

Paul's grin broadens, "New patrol shift? Did Jacob or Seth switch? Wait, let me guess. Seth!"

"Yes, Seth and I switched shifts. I'm being punished because I missed one fucking patrol. You slackers skip patrols all the time. But I miss _one_ and I'm off late night patrol and forced to afternoon duty with my Alpha. It's disgraceful. I feel like I'm being given a babysitter."

Paul punches me in the arm, "I like this girl, and she's really wearing you down; missing patrols, not completely focused on every detail around you. It looks good on you."

"Whatever, get the fuck off my truck, I need to get going. Try to control your woman. Tell her to leave mine alone."

Paul laughs and waves as I hop in the driver's seat, "You try controlling _your_ woman, let me know how that goes!"

-0-

After dropping my truck off at my place and grabbing a quick lunch, I'm back in the woods, patrolling the area near the cliffs. Seth pops in my head, wanting to know where I am. I show him the cliffs then make my way there. I have a little while until he shows up, since he was on the other side of the reservation.

I approach the edge of the cliffs, where I found Lillah yesterday. It seems so long ago now, but the fear is still very raw. The image of Lillah sitting with her feet dangling over the edge of the cliffs is fresh in my mind. As much as I expect her to wise up and realize I'm not good enough for her, I fear when that day comes. I won't fight her then. I'll have to let her go, but I don't think I'll be able to survive it. She is already such a huge part of my life. If I'm honest with myself, over the course of one week, Lillah has managed to become my life. Everything I do is somehow tied to her. Every decision I make, every thought I have, it's all for and about her. _I'm so fucked._

I quickly pull on my jeans when I hear Seth approaching a few minutes later. Even though technically Seth is only two years younger than Jacob, Quil, and I, he has always felt much younger. I suspect that is because of Leah. The way she sees Seth in her mind is always as her baby brother, not the man he has become. That imagery has always colored our impression of Seth. But now, Seth is nearly legal to drink, even though he's been buying alcohol for years. Another advantage of being a wolf, looking much older than our years, but not aging.

Seth is grinning wide when he appears. "Hey man! How's it going?"

"It's going good, how have you been? We missed you and Leah at the bonfire last night. Thanks for covering patrols for all of us."

Seth's winks, "Happy to help out. You've worked so many bonfires over the years. Now that you have an imprintee, it's important for both of you to attend those. Good bonding for everyone, even though you horny freaks spend most of the night under the blankets. I heard you and Lillah gave Paul and Rachel a run for their money last night."

"Jesus! Who's spreading the rumors? So far Jacob, Sam, Paul and now you have mentioned something. Does everyone know?" I'm running a hand through my hair, frustrated. I don't want them talking about Lillah like that. _Damnit, I shouldn't have pushed her last night._ But I couldn't resist touching her, tasting her, when she was so close to me.

Seth laughs and rolls his eyes, "Man, you know there aren't any secrets around here. Sam was sitting next to you guys. Between patrols and just general talk, everyone probably knows by now. But it's not like anyone is upset about it. It's good to hear you are connecting with her. I can't believe you haven't told her yet. Are you sure you can't claim her?"

"Pretty sure. She is so far out of my league, there's no way she could be happy with me." I lean against a tree, sighing at the thought.

Seth moves a few feet away, watching me with his arms crossed. I forget how much Seth has filled out over the years. He's not much smaller than me now.

"I don't know, Embry, from what Jacob was telling me, Lillah was quite happy with you last night. She couldn't take her eyes off of you."

"Whatever. Jacob lies."

"No man, he was telling me, even when she was running on the beach, playing with Claire, she kept looking for you, finding you, then returning to Claire. The way he described it was weird, sounded exactly like how Emily, Rachel and Kim watch Sam, Paul, and Jared. You might be surprised how happy she could be with you."

"Anyway, enough talk about Lillah. What do you want to know about my patrol shift you are stealing?"

Seth laughs loudly at this, "Don't blame me, blame my overprotective mom and sister. How often does my sister actually make patrols?"

I shrug, "About seventy-five percent, but most of the time, we barely acknowledge one another. We've been patrolling together so long; I hardly notice she's there anymore."

Seth is surprised by this, "You don't talk? I can't ever shut her up."

I chuckle at this thought, remembering Seth rambling all week while I covered Jacob's patrols. No wonder he's a blabber mouth, I'm sure between Leah and Sue he rarely gets to speak.

"We usually touch base once or twice during the night, but nothing big. She patrols the beach and the cliffs, while I patrol more of the forest and the border. Unless there is something suspicious, we both keep to ourselves."

Seth frowns, not happy to hear this information, "I doubt it will be that peaceful with me. I'm sure Mom told Leah to use this chance to find out what has been going on with me lately. Mom thinks I'm 'dating' like you used to. She is so nosy."

"You mean you aren't 'dating'? If not, then what's been going on with you lately?" I'm curious, because, as I've just been reminded, nothing is secret amongst our group.

"Don't tell anyone, ok? Especially Jacob. I don't want him to freak." I agree, not sure what kind of secret Seth could have that Jacob would freak out about.

Once Seth sees me nod, he launches into his story, almost like it's a relief for him to finally tell someone, "I've been hanging out at the Cullen house a lot lately. I can't afford college, but Edward has been teaching me a lot of stuff recently.

"He thinks that maybe they can work it up so that I can get some sort of certification. Maybe not a bachelor's degree, but possibly an associate's degree. Edward is looking into somehow creating an accredited school. I'm hopeful he can figure it out, or, at the very least, knowing the Cullen's, throw enough money at someone until they give in." Seth gives a short bark of a laugh at this thought before continuing, "If it works out, I can teach at the Rez School. I need a backup plan for when I stop phasing, and honestly, I hate the shop."

"Wow, man that is so cool. Does Rachel know? I bet she still has contacts at the school."

"Yeah, she's helping me out, though she doesn't know I'm working with Edward on the education part. She would tell Jacob. Of course, being at the Cullen house means I've been hanging out a lot with Ness. She's cool, but obviously, I feel nothing for her. But I think Jacob would lose it if he knew. Which is another reason why I was happy to change shifts. Jacob digs into my mind whenever he can. He means well, but when you are hanging out at his girl's house, you kind of don't want him finding out."

I stand up, clapping my hand on Seth's shoulder. "Your secret is safe with me, you have my word. Anything I should know about Jacob?"

"Nah, like I said, he likes to dig into your mind, but he means well. You know, he's a great Alpha and a good friend."

"It's very true. Alright, I'm going to get back to patrolling. See you later, Seth."

"Yeah, hey Embry," I've already started walking towards the forest, but turn back, "Leah wanted me to mention, you owe us a family dinner one night. All wolves, all imprintees. Leah is dying to meet the girl that finally caught you."

I grin, waving a hand over my shoulder, "Yeah yeah, tell her to talk with Emily to set something up. Hopefully Emily and Rachel can plan and just let us know when it is. Then I'll just have to bring Lillah and eat! Later, Seth. Good luck patrolling with Leah!"

"Good luck with Lillah. Can't wait to officially meet her!"

-0-

A few hours later, I'm finally heading home. Of course, after giving me so much shit about missing patrols, Jacob wasn't there this afternoon. Seth showed me as he was heading home from the cliffs that is was a fifty-fifty shot on whether or not Jacob would patrol. No wonder Paul thought I was perfect all the time. Obviously everyone else slacked off way more than even I knew.

Once I arrive home, I text Lillah to let her know I'm running later than I had originally planned. I didn't know about the new patrol shift when I left her house this morning.

I shower quickly. Of course, the 'morning' wood never left me today. The memories of my time with Lillah yesterday and this morning just making it more painful. I once again take care of myself, hoping that I can at least find enough relief so I can spend the evening with Lillah without my cock throbbing all night long.

I start to get dressed, but look at my watch. I realize if I phase and run there, I could shave twenty minutes or so off my time. That would mean twenty more minutes with Lillah, and my truck wouldn't be parked in front of her house. I don't want her neighbors and friends gossiping about her, its bad enough that the entire wolf pack knows what's going on with us.

I stuff clean jeans and a decent black t-shirt into my pouch, along with the lacy purple bra, which I guess I have to return to Lillah. I wear my boxers out, but pull them off as soon as I hit the woods, running towards Lillah's house.

I pull my boxers and jeans back on in record time once I arrive at her house. Following the instructions from her last text, I find the hide-a-key on the back porch and let myself in. Not wanting to surprise Angela, in case she's here, I quietly whisper, "Lillah?"

I walk into the kitchen, my stomach grumbling when I smell the delicious scents of whatever it is that Lillah has prepared. But she's not in here. Walking across the front entryway, I peek into the living room, but no Lillah. I assume she's getting dressed in her room. I decide to give her privacy, planning to stay in the hallway until she walks out of the bedroom.

Instead, as I lean back against the wall, I hear her call out my name, her voice frantic. I'm running before I even realize I'm moving. I rush through her room, knowing the sound came from her bathroom. I slow my pace when I don't hear my name again, but I can hear her breathing, it's uneven and choppy, like she can't catch her breath.

I open the bathroom door slowly, not sure what scene will be presented to me. I am stunned by what greets my eyes. Lillah's head is leaning against the back of the bathtub, her eyes closed and her hands..._Oh. My. God. Is she? _

_She is, my God, she is._

Before me is the sexiest thing I've ever seen, Lillah, softly mumbling my name as she tries to get some sort of satisfaction. She calls out my name, louder this time, begging for _something_.

_Well that was a waste of a shower._ I'm instantly hard, watching her. I know I should look away, close the door, but I do neither. Instead, I walk toward her, intent on taking care of her and satisfying her beyond her imagination.

-0-

**A/N:** Well I guess Embry just warned us! Remember, we love to hear from our readers, so please click that little review button and let us know what you thought. We _will_ reply back!


	13. Chapter 13 Mercy

**Chapter 13 "Mercy"**

**Disclaimer: **We aren't SM - which should be obvious, because we like to make her characters do naughty things. We still own Lillah and the rest of the gang that we created.

**A/N: **Finally, the long awaited chapter. We won't waste your time with a long authors note...

_I don't know what this is  
But you got me good  
Just like you knew you would  
I don't know what you do  
But you do it well  
I'm under your spell_

_You got me begging you for mercy  
Why won't you release me  
You got me begging you for mercy  
Why won't you release me  
I said you better release me  
_"Mercy" - Duffy

**LPOV**

My eyes pop open and I'm greeted by deep, dark eyes. It's Embry and he looks so real that I gasp, pulling air into my lungs. _Please tell me I'm hallucinating_. His scent floods my senses and I try to swallow but my mouth is too dry.

"Oh shit. Oh shit, oh shit."

Words come tumbling out of my mouth, he's really here and I'm not _just_ imagining it. My hands pull away from the lower half of my body. I cross my arms over my breasts and stare at him, my mouth dropping open. I don't know what I can possibly say to explain this. Embry has caught me pleasuring myself, no doubt hearing me say his name too. I'm absolutely mortified. I shift in the tub awkwardly, biting down on my bottom lip when the tingling in my clit doesn't dissipate. The flush that burns my skin is both from arousal and embarrassment.

I turn slightly sideways, quickly, reaching for the towel I'd laid on the stool next to the tub. I jerk the corner of the towel and it sends my BlackBerry flying, luckily it lands on the floor and not in the steaming water. I pull the edge of the soft fabric to my chest, careful not to drag it into the bath with me, never taking my eyes off of him.

Embry doesn't say anything. He just stares into my eyes for a few long seconds before his gaze wanders down to my lips and back up. I watch him anxiously as he drops down to kneel on the floor. He lowers his head slowly, dipping his face down until his mouth is hovering over mine. I feel his breath on my lips and I think that he's going to kiss me but he doesn't.

"Should I leave, Lillah? _Please_ tell me to leave," he begs. "I don't know if I can-"

Embry cuts himself off and places his lips against the damp skin below my jaw, kissing it gently before nipping at it lightly. I know he's giving me the opportunity to tell him to go but I can't make my mouth work.

He moves down to the crook of my neck, inhaling deeply and making me shiver. His lips kiss along my skin, his tongue shooting out to taste me every few kisses. He moves across my shoulder and then to my collar bone.

"N-no, I-" I try to stutter out but I still can't think or form a thought with him so close.

As he moves along I tilt my head back so he has better access to my skin. I gasp, inhaling his spicy, woodsy scent into my lungs. My arms unwind and release my grip on the towel, letting it fall to the floor. I lift one of my hands to touch the side of his face. Hoping to convey to him that I don't want him to stop even though I can't say it out loud.

"You smell-" he begins and stops when I hear him inhale deeply, "so damn good. Vanilla and- something."

One of his hands lands on my shoulder, while the other moves ever so lightly across my collar bone. His fingers travel down toward my breasts, just barely grazing the swell of one, then the other. He moves to trail his finger tips along the side of my breast, still just barely touching my skin. Goose bumps pop up all over my skin. He's touching me so lightly that it borders on tickling; I would be laughing if it weren't for how turned on I am. Some part of my brain tells me this is insane, that I should be stopping him but I can't. He moves half way down my side then back up and under my breast to continue his journey. Down my stomach and _Oh God_. He circles my belly button. Instantly I'm wetter than before. My own hands are nothing compared to what I imagine his can do.

I'd been too petrified at being caught to move up until now. As his fingers move side to side along me bikini line my hips jerk automatically, pushing against him. When he doesn't move in lower I whimper in protest. Embry growls lightly next to my ear and I shudder. I'm panting, the movement of my chest pressing the side of one of my breasts against his chest. I want to feel his mouth on me, but he has it buried in the crook of my neck. It's so very close but too far away from my straining nipples. If only he'd just move down a little further.

Instead, he moves his mouth up my neck. Once again I think he's going to move over to my lips and finally kiss me. He pauses, lifts his head and his eyes meet mine once more. I try to swallow but my throat is too dry; the look on his face is indescribable. His eyes are black, his mouth is pulled into a flat line, and his brows are furrowed. He looks as if he's unsure of himself but I can't possibly imagine why that would be. His eyes dart back and forth between mine, as if he's searching for something. He nods slightly to himself, like he's made some sort of decision.

He grabs my towel off of the floor and holds it with his chin while it hangs against his chest. Then he's dipping his arms down in the tub and lifting me out, water cascading off of me. His movements are so fast I don't have time to react. Embry pulls me into his chest and allows my feet to touch the floor only long enough for him to wrap the bath towel around my body. I notice his eyes never leave mine. Then he's wrapping one arm around my waist and the other under my knees, lifting me again. He turns toward the bedroom, carrying me over to my bed where he sits me down gently.

I look up at him, more than a little nervous but still completely turned on; one outweighs the other by a large margin. He's wearing only a pair of blue jeans again; the water droplets from my wet skin cling to his bare chest. _He must have phased and ran here instead of driving._ He's beautiful in the light of the setting sun. I can see the ripples and dips on his muscles, his smooth skin sprinkled with hair down his abs. I don't think I'll ever get used to seeing him this way.

Embry kneels on the bed next to me. He says my name quietly, reverently before looking into my eyes. He leans down to kiss my lips while running one of his hands up and down my side gently. I open my mouth to him, needing to taste more of him but he pulls away. I groan and he laughs lightly.

"Patience, Lillah. I promise, it will be worth the wait."

Embry steps away to grab a spare towel from the bathroom. When he's out of the room I begin to try to regulate my breathing. My heart is racing and my eyes are darting everywhere. I'm a nervous wreck and I'm scared as hell, but it's not because I don't trust Embry. I know, even with the short amount of time that has passed since meeting him, that he won't allow me to do anything I'm uncomfortable with. I am torn between wanting him to rejoin me and wanting to jump off the bed and hide. It all stems from my lack of confidence; I try to push it away. I take deep breaths to calm my nerves.

When he returns, he begins drying my skin, starting at my feet. He moves up each calf in turn, gently massaging as he dries. Even with the fabric between his skin and mine his touch puts me a little more at ease. I giggle a little as he dries the back of my knees, hitting a particularly ticklish spot. He grins when he hears me but he doesn't stop.

I watch him as he continues up my thighs, closer, oh so close to where I really want him but can't bring myself to ask. He glances up at me while gripping the edges of the towel wrapped around my body and I nod my head. I realize then, he's been taking his time, allowing me to stop him or to change my mind and it gives me a little bit of confidence. If he hadn't wanted this just a little, he wouldn't have done any of this.

Slowly, gently, he pulls each side of the towel away, revealing my naked skin to him. He doesn't say a thing and I cringe, my hands clenching into fists before then relaxing slowly. I keep telling myself over and over that I'm ok, that Embry wouldn't be here if he didn't want to be. I'm almost afraid to look at him for fear of seeing disappointment. When I hear him inhale sharply I can't avoid looking at him any longer. What I see on his face surprises me. It's a look of wonder, of _lust_.

He drops both sides of the towel I'm laying on and he brings the other one up to my stomach, skipping my pelvic area altogether. When the soft cotton moves across my stomach his hands accidentally release the edge of the towel, allowing his fingers to trail gently along my skin. Goose bumps spread all over my body again and I hear his light chuckle when he sees them. My breasts react immediately, my nipples pucker and tighten as I draw in a deep breath. I can't believe I'm not scrambling to cover myself now that he has me completely naked. My first reaction would be to panic and grab for the towel but I still myself against it.

He moves to my arms and shoulders, skipping my breasts, drying my skin gently, as if he's afraid he may hurt me if he's too rough. Embry finishes and sits back, grinning down at me. His eyes still have not strayed from mine, I notice. He's trying to put me at ease and making sure I don't feel awkward about being naked before him. If I didn't want him so much, it would be sweet. His fingers move to gently stroke up and down my arm then he lifts my hand, bringing it to his lips and kissing it softly. _Oh yes, he's definitely going to drive me out of my mind._

"Hold on, I'll be right back," he finally speaks before climbing off of the bed.

I watch him walk around the foot of the bed, his movements stealth. He closes my bedroom door and I hear the lock click into place with a loud crack. The only other sound in the room is my breathing. He turns back, walking the same path around the bed. I watch the play of muscles over his body as he walks and I bite my lip. Coming _and_ going, he's incredibly beautiful. Watching him makes me remember I'm bare now. While it didn't bother me a few minutes ago, I start to get paranoid.

This time, I can't ignore the reaction and the slight panic and I pull the towel across my body, trying to hide myself. When Embry climbs back up onto the bed and spots it, he frowns. He scoots close to me and lies down on his side before speaking again.

"Why are you covering yourself now? You are so beautiful, Lillah. Never doubt that. You have no reason to hide from me," his voice is soft and earnest.

He places the backs of his fingers on my arm closest to him and rubs along my skin gently.

I stare at him with wide eyes, torn, "It's a reflex. It's not you. I'm sorry."

"Oh no, you don't owe me an apology."

Before I can respond to that, Embry leans down and kisses a trail, starting at my shoulder and moving up my neck. Each kiss up my neck lingers a little longer and after a couple, he begins nibbling gently. I _really_ like when he does this, as I'm sure he can tell by my sighs and quiet moans. I shiver under his lips and my eyes slip shut as my body relaxes. The hand that was stroking my arm moves under the edge of the towel and across my stomach. My muscles tense and recoil under his hands as he jerks away. I open my eyes to look at him. His face is creased with a frown but he quickly wipes it away.

I take a deep breath and reach out, grabbing his hand before he can get off of the bed. The last thing I want is to make him think I don't want him, because I do. I just can't be the seductive girl, the girl that makes the move on the guy. I bring his hand up and run one of my palms along his before kissing it in the middle. "Sorry, I'm just a little... anxious."

He lifts his eyes from his hand in mine up to my troubled gaze, "What are you anxious about?"

"I just- I don't want you to be disappointed. In me."

A crease grows between Embry's brows and he inhales deeply, "I can assure you, you won't- Lillah you _don't_ disappoint me. You are so beautiful. Please don't hide from me."

I swallow thickly and nod my head. Embry smiles at me then before returning to kissing my neck then down to my collar bone. He lifts his head to whisper against me skin, "You taste so good," he looks up at me, "Will you allow me to have more of you? May I help you, finish, what you started in the bath?"

I'm stunned at his words and I open my mouth to speak, blurting out my answer before I can lose my nerve, "Y-yes, I w-would like that." _That's an understatement if there ever was one._

Embry leans away from me and takes my chin in his hand, lifting my face so that I'm looking at him. He smiles and moves in to kiss me, his full lips pulling my bottom lip into his warm mouth. I lean into his kiss and feel him smile against my lips. I run my hands up his chest and over his shoulders until I'm able to thread my fingers through his hair. This is the part I can handle. I have experience with this. It's the bearing my soul and my body to him I'm not sure about.

Embry slips his hand over my stomach again, pushing the towel away slowly before moving his hand up to my ribs and stopping. I lift my chest off of the bed, hoping he understands my silent plea for him not to stop. He slowly starts moving his hand up again, caressing my skin as he moves up my ribs and to the underside of my breast. He stops there and gives me a second, I assume, to tell him to stop.

He palms my breast and moves his lips away from mine when I start breathing heavily. He buries his face in my neck, kissing and licking at my skin. I turn my face a little, into his temple and I inhale his manly scent. Except now I smell something burning along with his scent.

"Oh! Stop, Embry stop," I say suddenly and push him away. He scrambles back and looks worried, "The stove is on. The chicken, it's burning." I explain quickly.

Embry's head drops down to my shoulder and he shakes a little. He briefly kisses my skin before sitting up and laughing. "I'll be right back," he says moving across my room to the bedroom door.

I flop my head back on the bed and sigh, "This is insanity. I can't even get off without making a fool of myself."

Embry comes walking back through the door as I say, "Why do I bother? It's completely ruined!"

"Ruined? Not exactly. I kind of like my chicken a little dry anyway," he grins a crooked little grin.

"Liar," I smirk up at him.

Embry doesn't say anything as he climbs back up on the bed once more. Instead of taking his previous position, he lifts my shoulders so that I'm sitting up.

"I want to try this, if you feel uncomfortable just tell me. Okay?" he sounds concerned but when I nod my head I feel him relax.

He takes a seat behind me and leans back against the headboard. He gently tugs my shoulders, pulling me back against him. His hands move up my neck then back down and across my shoulders, massaging gently. I lean my head back against him, relaxing while his hands work the muscles in my neck and shoulders.

He places his lips on the nape of my neck and kisses my skin sweetly. I feel him pull away and run his nose down my neck while he inhales deeply. He kisses there again, this time swiping his tongue out. His hands move half way down my back then back up and over my shoulders to my collar bones. With each pass he moves lower and my body begins to react more and more.

My breasts are starting to grow heavy again, my nipples reacting as his fingers graze my skin. My hands fall, landing on the tops of his thighs, which are spread out on each side of my body. He's still wearing his jeans but I can feel the heat radiating off of him. It amazes me how high his body temperature runs. His hands make a pass down my arms, all the way down to my hands before traveling back up.

On a downward stroke of my arms he reaches the mid way point and moves each of his hands to my sides and around to my stomach. He pulls me back against him a little tighter and I swallow deeply. He's so close to the lower half of my body. I begin taking slow steady breaths, in through my nose, out through my mouth. I want him to continue touching me and I know if he senses I'm the least bit nervous, he'll stop.

Embry's hands sweep up my stomach and over my ribs to the underside of my breasts. Then he's finally touching me in one of the places I want him to most. He cups them in his palms and squeezes gently. I gasp his name and grip the tops of his thighs as he takes my nipples between his fingers and pulls lightly. An electric current shoots from my nipples through my stomach down to the dripping wet juncture between my thighs. Arching my back against his chest, I push my breasts into his hands. He growls and places his mouth in the crook of my neck before sucking my skin gently. I gasp out a long groan and he chuckles against my skin. _Yeah, cause this is a laughing matter._

I use his thighs as leverage and push down on them with my hands, moving my hips back against his groin. Embry's chest rumbles with a sound that is half moan, half growl and I inhale sharply. He has an erection. If I'd been paying more attention, or if he didn't have me so distracted, I would have noticed before. It's pressed against my lower back and for a second I wonder if he's going to need some help with that later. My brows furrow in concern but I quickly wipe the thought from my mind. I would cross that bridge whenever I happen to come to it.

He's so hard I can feel the zipper of his pants, rough against my skin. My thoughts are cut off when Embry releases one of my breasts and moves his hand down. He stops on my lower abdomen and I whimper when he whispers in my ear, "I'm going to touch you, Lillah. I hope that's okay. Because really, I might go insane if I don't."

The tone of his voice is gruff and it sends shivers up my spine. He rolls my other nipple between his thumb and forefinger while he waits on my reply. I can't really speak though. My head sort of does a bobble against his shoulder. I'm finally able to nod slowly and turn my face into his neck, kissing his hair line tentatively. Those small movements are about all I can handle. My body has gone taut and still in anticipation.

Embry releases my other breast and moves his hand down so that now both of them are on my hips. He hesitates for a second but when I flick my tongue against his skin he grips my hips and pulls me roughly into his hard-on. I groan and pull my face away from his neck, "Embry, please."

"Please, what? Tell me what you want, Lillah."

"I want you, Embry. I- I need- you." I tell him in between shallow breaths.

"You have me already," he says so seriously that I almost believe he means it. Except he probably means it in an entirely different way than I want him to.

I run my hands down his legs then place them on top of his, linking our fingers on my hips. I move my body against his, smiling lazily when he hisses as I grind into his erection. There's a part of me that wants to just see how far I can take this, to see what I can push him to do. To see his reactions to me. But more than that, I want to feel him touch me, to make me feel things that no one else ever has. I want him to do things to me that I've never experienced before, and never want to from anyone other than him.

Embry lifts our hands away from my hips and brings them up so he can kiss the back of each of my hands. I place one of my hands on the back of his neck and drop the other back down to this thigh. He puts his hands on my ribs and slides them down then back up, all the way to my breasts, repeating his earlier actions. Gentle squeeze, a little pull and a twist of my nipples. _Feels _so_ good_.

The insides of my thighs are wet with arousal and I shift a little, rubbing them together, trying to find some sort of relief. It only creates enough friction that it heightens the pressure I'm feeling. I don't know if he's ever going to touch me now, even though he asked permission. It's almost like he's hesitant. I don't know what he would be afraid of. _I _should be the one freaking out.

Embry drops his face back into my neck and begins kissing, sucking and nipping at my skin. He creates a pattern between his mouth on my neck and his fingers on my breasts. Now my whole body is burning for him, demanding he help me find release. I'm panting openly, not trying to hide it as I had been before. My lungs are burning and I can't control myself any longer. I usually hate feeling out of control, but with him, I don't care. He is breaking down every defense I'd ever set against a man.

Embry is making a low growling sound deep in his chest. It's sexy and only serves to turn me on more, especially when I realize_ I'm_ causing that reaction in him.

Long fingers and wide palms move down from my breasts to my ribs then stomach and hips. Embry holds my hip with one hand then scorches a path from the other, over to the center of my abdomen. He's so close, so close to where I need him to touch me. He's is whispering against my skin, his mouth buried in my neck, muffling his words so I can't understand them.

I move my hips against his hands and he grips my one hip a little tighter and pulls away from my neck long enough to make a tsk sound. I stop quickly, afraid if I do something 'wrong', he won't continue. Seeing as I have no idea what in the hell I'm doing, I see this as a very likely possibility. He mutters words of praise and kisses my skin tenderly.

Embry gives me a second before he continues his sweet torture. Somewhere in the back of my mind I wonder if he's also giving himself some time. _Possibly because he's unsure about doing this in the first place?_

His splayed fingers begin moving again, down my abdomen and, _oh dear Lord._ He cups my heat in his hand but doesn't move. I squeeze my eyes shut and take deep breaths, trying to steady myself.

"You're so wet, Lillah. Is this all for me?" he asks, his voice sounding different, almost as if he's crooning.

Embry slips his fingers down and back up my wet lips. I'm incapable of speaking now. The only thing I can do is make nonsensical sounds and pant for air. _Sexy_.

"So sexy," he says gruffly in my ear, as if he can read my mind. Embry makes this little "mmm" sound when he slides the tip of one of his fingers just barely into me.

I turn my face into his neck, panting, my open mouth against his hot skin.

Embry slips his finger into me and we moan together. I feel my muscles tense up and Embry stops to distract me. There are two sides of me warring now. I want him to touch me, to make me cum, but another part of me still has the fear of his disappointment shining through. He pulls his neck away from my mouth and leans down to cover my lips with his. When I begin to relax again he slides his finger back out then up and down my heat before circling my clit. I cry out against his mouth and I feel his lips move into a smile.

He licks along my bottom lip and I open my mouth to him. His tongue enters my mouth and as he feels me relax more he slides his finger back into my core. He's mimicking the movements of our tongues with that of his finger. He brings his free hand up to dive into my hair, gripping it tightly, pulling lightly. I move my tongue against his slowly, taking my time to taste him and to savor his kisses. The movement of our mouths is slow and gentle but his hand below my waist becomes more urgent.

He massages my inner walls with his finger and then pulls it out, adding another one with it before slipping them both into me. His two fingers fill me much more than my own. I'd never successfully fingered myself before, never had a great reason to, until him. After feeling his hands on me, I doubt I'll ever be able to try it on my own again.

I clench around his fingers and he pauses, giving me time to adjust to him and I realize he has no idea I've never allowed anyone to do this before him.

"You're so tight. I can't imagine what it would feel like to have my cock inside of you," his words make my eyes roll back in my head and cause a moan to erupt from my chest.

My hands fall back onto his thighs and I grip his legs tightly, pushing back against him. I break away from his mouth, panting in shallow breaths. Embry's face drops to my shoulder and he watches his hand as it slowly pulls away from me and then enters again.

The hand that he has tangled in my hair drops down to my thigh and runs under my knee. "Oh God," I moan when he lifts my leg and places it on the other side of his making his fingers go a little deeper. He stills his hand again and gives me a few seconds to get used to him. I realize that his upper body is tense and taut and I wonder if he knows.

He runs his hand from my knee up my thigh, teasing softly until his fingers join his other hand. He uses his thumb to lightly stroke my clit. The sensations he's creating nearly bring me off of the bed but Embry tells me softly, "Patience, baby." His gruff voice and his words cause a shiver to course through my body.

He's doing things to me I never imagined were possible, that any man would ever want to do to me. The burn that had been building up in my stomach reaches down to my clit. I'm hoping he will somehow make this last a bit longer. I'm afraid when it's over, he will leave or things will become awkward. I don't want to lose him _or_ this. I push the thought aside, needing to enjoy what he's doing to my body and not dwell on my fears.

Every pass that he makes against my clit sends me a little bit closer to the edge. I press my hips back against his over and over. Feeling his erection arouses me more. It was never anything like this with Carter. I'd only felt Carter erect a few times, when he was drunk, and it was certainly nothing compared to Embry. Feeling Carter turned on never effected me the way it does feeling Embry. It makes me wetter, more needy. His fingers are picking up pace and it takes a minute for me to realize the loud moaning and gasping I hear in the otherwise quiet room is coming from me. I bite down on my bottom lip to stifle the noises I'm making.

"Don't hold back, I want to hear you," he says quietly then starts placing kisses along my shoulder and up my neck. He nips lightly between kisses and I whimper. _Oh, God._

Everything happens so quickly. I try to control my body's reactions but I can't seem to get a grip on it. There is a flush covering my entire body. I feel like I'm going to combust, that my body is going to fly into a million pieces. I know only Embry can give me that now but I'm trying to fight it, wanting this to last. I don't know what my body's reaction will be and I'm afraid of Embry's. He stops my thoughts as he purrs into my ear.

"I want you to cum for me, Lillah."

I bend my knees, a natural reaction, opening my legs a little and allowing myself to push the soles of my feet against the mattress. My clit tingles against his hand and he takes two fingers and pinches it lightly. He pushes his fingers into me once more and my body clenches again but this time, I'm unable to relax. I rock my hips against his hand a few more times and I shudder violently.

He buries his face into my neck and bites down gently and that's my breaking point. The tension that had built up begins to release. It's nothing like I'd ever dreamed it would be. Behind my tightly closed eyelids I see the blackest black and then a torrent of color. As cheesy as it sounds, it's like fireworks going off in my head. And it's all because of him. The building up of tension and the way he's making me feel now. _Wanted and desired._

Embry continues to move his fingers inside of me and the words that tumble from his lips sound foreign to me. My ears are roaring as my heart pounds, sending blood rushing through my body. It's the most amazing feeling. It's as if I'm finally alive and able to enjoy what I never could before. The most ridiculous noises are rolling off of my tongue now. Things that aren't even real words.

I can feel Embry's chest panting against mine, pushing into my back. He hasn't stopped moving his hand against me. I'm so sensitive now that it borders on discomfort but I can't bring myself to tell him to stop. I move my hips with his hand, rubbing against his erection, reveling in the sounds that are coming from him. I want to make him feel just as good as he's made me feel.

As incredible as this is, I can only imagine what it would be like to have more of him. Our bodies moving together, him inside of me, calling my name as he releases. I hope that one day; he'll be willing to give _that_ a try.

He twists his fingers in me and I whimper when he stops the hand he had been using on my clit. I don't have much time to protest because then he's tugging one of my nipples lightly, adding more pressure each time. I feel more arousal pool between my legs and Embry uses it to pump his fingers slowly, in and out of my overly sensitive body.

His mouth sucks my neck and he bites down again, causing a sweet mixture of pleasure and pain. He's overwhelming me from every point of contact. I'm sure that is exactly what he's intending and as much as I love it, I don't know if I can take it much longer. I'm on the edge again and I am almost begging him to push me over again.

I reach up and grip his hair, tugging roughly so it causes him to pull his mouth from my neck. I open my eyes and when his meet mine I see him in a way I've never seen him before. His eyes are dilated and so full of lust that I'm almost afraid. _Almost, but not quite._ He's beautiful and sexy and I have to kiss him. I drop my eyes to his lips and he licks them automatically. I don't waste time and wait on him to move his face toward mine. I pull his face down by the back of his neck and I practically attack his mouth. He has the smallest amount of stubble on his chin and it's rough against my sensitive lips.

There's no holding back anymore. I tear my mouth from his and press myself down on his hand, letting him know I need a touch more pressure. I'm almost there. It feels more intense than the first time and I move on instinct now, turning my face into his neck and kissing him lightly.

I say his name just before I know it's going to happen, just to warn him.

Then I can't control myself anymore. My mouth on his neck muffles the "YES" I scream. Before I can stop myself I latch onto his neck with my front teeth. Embry roars out, "Fuck". I'm so out of my mind while I ride out my orgasm I don't realize I've just bitten him.

He gently uses his fingers to bring me back down. I place kisses along the underside of his jaw and slowly move my mouth up to his. We share long slow kisses until I'm able to really catch my breath and realize what I've done. _Holy shit_.

I pull my lips away from his and he's looking down at me as I slowly open my eyes. "What- was that?" I ask and blush scarlet. Obviously I know what that was but I'm shocked. I never thought it would feel like that. And I certainly never expected it to happen twice. Now I understand what all the fuss is about. I also know I'll never want to share something like this with anyone other than Embry.

_How am I ever going to be just friends with him after this?_

-0-

**A/N:** OK. Whew. We hope it was worth the wait! What are these two going to do now? Hang around for the next chapter, Embry's POV. What do you think was going through _his_ mind?


	14. Chapter 14 Hold Your Breath

**Chapter****14 "Hold Your Breath"**

**Disclaimer:** We still aren't SM. Though we wish we had her money so we could travel more. Until then, we'll just continue to make her characters do naughty things. We do own Lillah and the rest of the gang that we created.

**A/N:** Did we all enjoy Eclipse? We especially enjoyed the "Bad Ass Embry" that showed up at the graduation party. We think David Slade or Kiowa Gordon have been reading our little story, that was our Embry on the big screen! Thanks as always to our amazing beta dailyicandy for fixing all our crazy mistakes and putting up with our insanity!

_The best thing about tonight's that we're not fighting  
Could it be that we have been this way before  
I know you don't think that I am trying  
I know you're wearing thin down to the core  
But hold your breath  
Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you  
_"Fall For You" - Secondhand Serenade

**EPOV**

"What- was that?"

There are so many thoughts running through my head right now that I can't focus on any single one. _I just finger fucked Lillah and it was fucking hot as hell. Shit I'm so close to cumming right now. She bit me and I want her to do it again, now. She's so tight. Of course she's tight, she's a virgin. Fuck. She's a virgin. I want her to be mine, all mine, but I can't take that from her. Screw being a virgin, she's mine; I need to make love to her. I need her, now. How the hell has she never had an orgasm?_

Deciding to focus on this last thought, I pick Lillah up. I can't cross my legs because of the pain in my crotch, so I close my legs and let her sit in my lap. I make sure she isn't touching my groin before wrapping my arms around her. I tuck her head under my chin while my fingers draw lazy circles on her hip.

"Lillah, what do you mean 'what was that'? Haven't you ever...?"

Lillah is still warm from her two orgasms, but I can tell her skin is turning pink from blushing, not from her multiple releases. She shakes her head under my chin, mumbling, "No...Never."

"You've never done that to yourself?"

She again shakes her head. "I have- tried. But not- um, it was nothing like that."

"Lillah, please look at me."

She slowly lifts her head. Her eyes are wide, her chin pink, and her neck red. I can see the marks from my teeth along her neck and shoulders. She looks like she's been attacked. But then she gives me a small smile and blushes again. She is so innocent, but she also looks very satisfied. This makes me want to pound my chest, knowing I caused that.

"Lillah, why didn't you tell me you were a virgin?" My eyes don't stray from hers.

She gasps, her hand moving to her mouth, "Um, how did you- know?" She reaches for her hair, twisting a loose strand around a finger and tries to look away from me.

I pull her hand from her mouth, kissing her palm. I place her hand against mine, my eyes never straying from hers, "You are so tight, Lillah. And I could feel that... barrier."

Lillah looks down at our hands. I follow her eyes, the difference in our hands obvious, my fingers wider and longer than hers.

She whispers, "I'm sorry, Embry."

As if that's something she needs to apologize for?

"Don't apologize, Lillah. I'm not mad, baby, just, surprised. How is it possible? Rachel told me you had a boyfriend in college."

Lillah leans forward and tentatively kisses my chin, "You were right last night, Rachel talks way too much."

Hearing her echo my words from last night makes me smile. Lillah returns my smile then rests her head against my shoulder.

"I did date someone in college, but he never- he was basically dating me for the status my family could bring him. I found out later he cheated on me almost the whole time we dated. I was so focused on school work and never felt, sexy, with him. I never felt comfortable enough for him to touch me, and well, he didn't really want to touch me, unless he was drunk."

I can't control the growl that comes from deep in my chest, "I hate cheaters. He didn't deserve to get to touch you. What kind of man wouldn't make you feel sexy? Wouldn't want to touch you? You are the sexiest woman I've ever known, Lillah. As you can obviously tell, I can't keep my hands off of you. If I ever see him I…well I don't know what I would do to him."

"Oh, Embry, no. He won't- no, he's not worth it." Lillah looks petrified, "Please, promise me, you won't ever waste your time on him. He's not worth it." Lillah is practically lying on top of me. When she moves to look me straight in the eye her thigh brushes my throbbing cock.

I close my eyes and try not to howl in pain. I'm in desperate need of relief. Watching her was the sexiest thing I've ever seen and I'm so close, but I can't right now. I reach for her hips, quickly pulling her bottom half off of me, setting her on the bed.

I slowly open my eyes. Lillah's eyes are wide when she looks down at my obvious erection and then back up at me. I groan, "Did I mention you are the sexiest woman I've ever known? I'm just a little, uncomfortable right now. Between watching you cum and you biting me, yeah."

"Did I hurt you? I've never- I didn't mean to do that, it just felt, right."

"Hurt? God no! It was fucking sexy as hell. I liked it too much."

Lillah smiles shyly, resting her face against my shoulder again, "I liked it too. I've never thought about that, but it was, um, nice."

"Nice is an understatement. Your little mouth is quite dangerous to my sanity." Before I can say anything else, my stomach grumbles loudly.

Lillah giggles, "Come on, let's feed you some overcooked chicken."

"Mmm, overcooked chicken, one of my all time favorites. Mind if I use your bathroom?"

Lillah's cheeks turn pink but she nods, "Sure, just grab my BlackBerry while you are in there, please?"

"No problem," I slide off the bed, giving her some privacy to get cleaned up and dressed. I walk into the bathroom, quietly shutting the door. Leaning against the door, I do my best to catch my breath and control my libido. This room smelling like Lillah and the memory of finding her in the bath doesn't help.

_A virgin. Can't fuck her. Not now._

I reach in to pull the plug in the bathtub so the water can drain out. I turn to look for a towel and see a pale pink satiny robe sitting on the countertop, next to a pair of lacy underwear. "Good God, she's trying to kill me."

My cock is throbbing. It wouldn't take much, a few strokes, and I could have a bit of relief. If it were any other woman, any other house, I probably would. But here, in Lillah's house, with her just a few rooms away, I can't. It doesn't feel right.

I pull my t-shirt out of my pouch, along with her bra from last night. I slip the t-shirt over my head then set the bra next to her robe. While my cock is still throbbing, a few minutes away have helped ease the immediate pain. Plus, I hate being away from her.

As I'm washing my hands quickly I hear her BlackBerry beep. I dry my hands and reach for the phone, which landed just underneath the bathroom counter in her rush to grab a towel. I don't recognize the name that pops up, Carter Baldwin, but based on the message, I can guess who sent the message.

_You won't ever meet someone as good as me, I know you miss me._

"What the fuck?" I quickly type out a response to the jackass.

_She's mine now, asshole, back the fuck off or deal with me._

Before I can hit the send button I stop myself. I know Lillah won't appreciate it. I delete the message quickly. I'm pretty sure this is the jerk of an ex-boyfriend in Seattle Rachel mentioned, but I need confirmation from Lillah.

Lillah is humming as I approach the kitchen. It looks like she is finishing making dinner. She's pulled on black pants and a tank top. I'm curious if she's wearing anything underneath her clothes, but I'm more concerned about the message.

I drop the phone on the counter next to her, my hands resting on her hips before kissing her shoulder. "You have a message."

Ignoring the phone on the counter, Lillah quickly turns around and grins at me. She stands on her tip toes, wrapping her arms around my neck, pulling my head down. She lightly brushes her lips across mine. I can feel her nipples through both of our shirts, which makes me grin.

"What was that for? Not that I'm complaining."

"I forgot to say- Thank you."

Her hands slowly move from the back of my neck, down my arms to my hands. She links our fingers together before kissing under my chin briefly.

"You are more than welcome. I'm happy to help you any time."

Her cheeks darken before she releases my hands and turns around. Not wanting to miss an opportunity, I wrap my arms around her waist and tug her back against me. She gasps when she feels my still hard cock against her ass.

"And any time you want to return the favor, I would love your assistance."

I can feel her spine stiffen, confused by her response, I quickly take a step back, spinning her in my arms.

"Lillah, what's wrong?"

"I just- I didn't think you'd expect me to, uh- never mind. It's stupid." I can see tears forming in her eyes before she quickly looks away.

"Lillah, please don't look away from me." I gently lift her face with both of my hands, "I have absolutely no expectations of you. Whatever you feel comfortable with is fine by me. If you ever feel uncomfortable, just tell me no. I'm a big boy, I can handle it. I will never be too far gone to stop if you need me to."

She nods once, but I don't give her a chance to respond, stepping back slowly and walking around to the other side of the island in the middle of the kitchen. I keep an eye on her face as I lean against the counter. Wanting to lighten the mood, I grin, remembering my first dream of her. "Besides, it's much sexier to watch you beg. You are so sexy when you ask for what you want."

Her cheeks are bright red now, but she's smiling, which I take as a positive sign. She finishes whatever she was doing at the stove then grabs the phone. I'm guessing she was expecting Rachel by her grin. I can tell she isn't happy when she reads the message. She tosses the BlackBerry back onto the counter and rolls her eyes as she turns back to the stove.

"Lillah." I hesitate. I don't want her to get upset again, but I also need to know. Before I can try again, she looks up and smiles softly.

"I really don't want to talk about him tonight. He's not worth either of our time or energy. Besides, dinner is ready. I think I've managed to save most of the chicken."

I nod once, smiling at her, "Fine, no talk of the asshole tonight. But, if he is bugging you, I want you to tell me, promise?"

"Promise. There's beer, wine, soda, water, and milk in the fridge. Do you mind grabbing the wine for me? White please. Grab whatever you'd like to drink. I'll bring our plates to the table."

I grab a beer, two bottles of water and the bottle of wine out of the refrigerator, carrying everything to the table. I grin when I see there is one plate filled with three pieces of chicken, a large pile of vegetables and potatoes. The other plate on the table has one piece of chicken and a few vegetables. I set the drinks down and hold her chair out for her. Once she sits I take my seat. "This looks amazing, Lillah. Thank you."

"Thanks, I love cooking; it's nice to have someone to share it with."

I'm puzzled by this comment as we both start eating, "What about your cousin, Angela? Doesn't she ever eat with you?"

"When she's around, but she spends a lot of time at her boyfriend's house."

"Is that where she is now?"

She turns a light pink and nods, "Yeah. I might have told her you were coming over tonight. She decided to make herself scarce; she'll probably stay the night at Ben's place."

I laugh at this admission, "That was very nice of her to give us some privacy."

"Mmm, nice. So what did you do while you were gone earlier?"

"Not too much, ran into a couple of the guys, talked about a few things going on. Jacob summoned me to a meeting," I don't want to make a big deal out of the meeting, so I try to play if off casually.

Lillah's head pops up, "What do you mean 'summoned'?"

"Well, Jacob is my Alpha. This means he is my leader and can command me to do something. If he commands it, I have to do it, no questions asked. He commanded I meet him and Sam at Sam's house this afternoon."

"Wait, so you have to follow his every command? Even if he tells you to jump off a cliff?"

I take a sip of my beer and laugh, "I already jump off cliffs, and Jacob doesn't have to command that. He's a fair Alpha; he's only commanded me to do stuff a few times over the years. Even when Sam was my Alpha, he only commanded a few things of me. They are both decent guys."

Lillah points her fork at me, "We will get back to the cliff jumping stuff later. And the part about Sam used to be your Alpha. What was so special that Jacob commanded to see you today? Wouldn't you just go willingly if he asked you?"

"Normally yes, but I kind of knew what they wanted to talk to me about. I was pissed they even wanted to talk to me. Even with the command I took my sweet time getting there, since Jacob didn't say I had to be there at a specific time."

"It was about me, wasn't it?" Lillah mumbles, looking down at her plate.

I reach across the table, lifting her chin, "Absolutely not, they both love you. In fact, everyone I saw today was telling me how much they either like you or are dying to meet you."

I exhale before continuing, "Jacob and Sam wanted to see me because of a mistake I made."

"What mistake?"

"I missed patrols."

Lillah frowns and then gasps, "Oh God, it was about me. You missed patrols because of me. You patrol in the middle of the night, and last night you fell asleep here, with me. Embry I'm so sorry. How much trouble are you in? Should I talk to them?"

"Calm down, Lillah. It isn't your fault. They just wanted to talk with me. And to remind me of my duty to the tribe, like I could forget."

"Oh. Well, I'm sorry again. I didn't mean to get you in trouble." Lillah looks down at her plate, pushing her vegetables around. When she speaks again it nearly breaks my heart how sad she sounds, "I understand you can't stay again. What you do for the tribe is important, I get it."

I should correct her. Tell her about the switch in my patrol shift, but I don't say anything. As much as I want to stay with her tonight, I don't think I'll be able to control myself. Plus, I shouldn't be so selfish. It's just going to hurt more when someone better comes along and claims her.

I wrack my brain trying to come up with a change of subject, something to distract her from my missed patrols. Remembering talking with Paul earlier, I smirk, "I hear Rachel paid you a visit this afternoon while I was away."

"How did you know? Rachel said Paul didn't even know she was here."

I roll my eyes. Sometimes, the imprintees can be so clueless. Like we wouldn't know what they were up to. "Paul knew exactly where she was, especially since I had just come back from Sam and Emily's and neither Emily nor Rachel was there. What did she want?"

Lillah looks away from me and turns pink again. I can't contain the laugh that escapes seeing her blush, "That bad? Did she tell you about another one of her and Paul's sexcapades?"

She whips her head up, looking shocked, "She tells you about that stuff?"

I tap my finger against my forehead. "She doesn't have to tell, Paul freely shares with all of us, whether we like it or not."

"Oh right, the mind sharing thing. How does that work? Can you turn it off?"

I'm finished with my dinner by this point. I sit back and finish off my beer before responding. "Sometimes I can ignore it, but the only thing we can control is what we share. We've all gotten pretty good at controlling our thoughts, unless something, or someone, has us distracted. Paul just likes to show off."

"So is it like a television show? If Paul is showing you those images- well, it must be pretty, um, sexy, right?"

I groan, "In theory it would sound sexy. In reality, Rachel is like an annoying sister and Paul is like a jerk of an older brother. It's just gross. Thankfully I've learned to ignore him most of the time. But I hear Rachel likes to share a lot with the other ladies, so you might want to watch out."

When Lillah groans, I can't help my laughter. I walk around the table and kiss her cheek before reaching for her empty plate, "Dinner was delicious, thank you."

"So what did Rachel want?" I ask as I take our dishes to the sink.

"Um, she wanted to grill me about last night." Lillah is putting the bottle of wine away, but turns back to me before she closes the refrigerator, "Do you want another beer?"

"Yeah sure, thanks. What about last night? The bonfire...or after?" I put the dishes in the dishwasher while Lillah puts the few leftovers away.

I'm stunned by how comfortable this evening has been so far. Us talking, sharing a dinner, cleaning the kitchen, it's like we've been doing this for years, not just met a week ago. Even Lillah seems at ease. I wonder if it is being in the kitchen, finally having some satisfaction, or just being able to be comfortable around each other that has eased some of her tension.

She puts the baking pan in the sink before leaning her head against my shoulder as I wash the pan, "Just the bonfire. I didn't mention anything about later. Why?"

"Well, between missing patrols last night and my truck still being at the beach this morning," I dry my hands on the towel next to the sink. Running my hands through my hair I turn to face Lillah, dreading telling her this, "Most of the guys figured out I was over here last night. Including Paul. He was waiting at my truck when I went to pick it up this afternoon."

For once, Lillah doesn't blush. This time her face goes white, she looks panicked. "Do you think he'll tell Rachel? Will everyone know?"

I quickly pull Lillah into my arms, "Don't worry. They know you are a good person. Paul won't tell Rachel. It's just the guys that know for sure, and they've been sworn to secrecy. Rachel will only know if you tell her."

Lillah is once again grasping my shirt in her tiny hands. I smile sadly at the difference between now and just over a week ago. Even though it's only been a short time, I hate that I let so many days pass by that I could have been spending with her. Tonight has been amazing. Beyond what happened in her bedroom earlier, just being here with her, sharing dinner, talking, has been one of the best nights of my life.

I kiss her forehead before my hand grabs both of hers'. She lets go of my shirt, wrapping the fingers of one of her hands in mine. She grabs her BlackBerry and glass of wine in her free hand and tugs me, "Come on."

"Where are you taking me?" I laugh, grabbing my beer bottle off the counter, willingly following her.

"I'm kidnapping you and taking you to my private island."

As we walk into the living room, I stop laughing, hoping she's joking but needing to double check, "You don't really have a private island, right?"

She flops down on the couch, setting her wine on the table before looking up at me, puzzled, "No, it's a joke, Embry. I actually don't own much."

I sit toward the middle of the couch, leaving some distance between us. I want to pull her against me, but I also want to be able to focus on what we are talking about. "You own two cars, and this house. That is a lot more than I have."

Lillah sighs, "The house was my grandparent's. When they passed away, they willed it to my parent's. My parent's never wanted to move back here, but they knew I did, so they remodeled the house for me, they gave it to me as a graduation present. I know it seems like a lot for a graduation present, but I've loved this house all my life, and my parents knew that."

"Wow. But the two cars?" I question her further. This is something that still bugs me.

She grins with pride, "The Camaro that I allowed you to drive last night is my baby. My dad and I rebuilt it together during high school. It was our father/daughter project. The other car my dad forced upon me. I'm paying him back for it, but it was not my first choice in a 'reliable' vehicle."

"You rebuilt the Camaro?" I'm shocked by this. I would never imagine Lillah getting her hands greasy. This makes her even more beautiful, sexy, and perfect in my mind.

"Yeah, from the ground up. I can't do the welding work, we had to have help with that, but, everything else my dad and I did on the weekends. It was amazing."

I throw my head back in laughter, "Damn, you might actually know more about cars than Quil. I bet if you ever give up teaching Sam would happily hire you. Plus you'd bring the customers in, I'm sure they'd rather have you work on their cars than one of us guys."

"I doubt that, especially the female customers. I'm sure you guys get more than one female stopping by to ogle you." Lillah doesn't look jealous; more like this is an acceptable norm.

"I guess it could happen, but honestly, most are imprinted and barely recognize any woman other than their imprintee." It takes everything in me not to give my secret away right there. I continue before she can realize my near admission, "Those that aren't don't really care about the women that visit the garage."

I miss touching her. I don't like her being so far away, even if it is just a little distance on the couch. Grinning at her puzzled face, I lean back, my head resting on the arm of the sofa, my back against her legs, and my legs stretched out across the couch. Lillah's eyes go wide again, but she doesn't object. "I'm not too heavy, right?"

She shakes her head no then returns to her line of questioning. Of course, her increased heart rate and pink cheeks tell me more than she does, but I let it go.

"So, once you guys imprint you don't notice other women?"

"Nope." I reach for her hair, releasing it, letting it tumble over her shoulder. My fingers begin twisting in her hair, distracting her from this sensitive topic, "But enough about imprinting, tell me about you. You grew up in Forks? Why did you move away?"

Lillah closes her eyes for the briefest of seconds, a small moan escaping her lips. She seems to hesitate then makes up her mind, her face turning determined. She places her hand over the one I have resting on my chest, her fingers sliding over each ridge and dip as she begins speaking.

"Yeah, my parents lived here most of their lives, but they both were offered great opportunities at law firms in Seattle when I was ten, so we moved away. But they let me come back and visit my grandparents as much as I wanted." She smiles sadly, "Which was a lot. I love this house; it reminds me so much of them. I used to sit at that table in the kitchen with my grandmother and watch her cook for hours. She's the one that taught me to cook. My proportion sizes are way off, she was always cooking for the entire family. I have such a hard time just cooking for myself, I always make too much."

"This friendship is looking very promising; I'm always willing to eat! Seriously, if you ever have too many left overs, just drop them off at the shop, they won't go to waste." I can't contain my grin, especially since her fingers are exploring past my hand, up my forearm.

"You guys really eat that much all the time?"

"Yeah, it's a wolf thing, our metabolisms are crazy high, or something like that. We also don't get drunk, since our bodies burn off the alcohol so quickly."

She grins down at me, "Must be nice."

"Not really, especially when you want to be drunk, but you get used to it." Before she can ask why I would want to get drunk, I change the subject back to her, "Why did you decide to become a teacher?"

Her eyes light up, and I have my answer, but I'm still interested in the details. Her voice is dreamy as she speaks, "I love history. Learning about it makes me so happy. But I also love helping others. I love when a student gets so wrapped up in history they are able to forget their current problems."

"And cheerleading?"

"I was a cheerleader in high school. It wasn't my first choice, but I ended up being good at it. The only thing was, since I was such a bookworm, I never really felt like I was close with the other girls. They didn't get me. Rachel and I are really hoping to help our girl's have a better experience than I did, to really feel like a team. You need friends to survive, especially in high school."

My smile is wide as look her in the eyes, "Yes, it is very important to have friends."

Her hand is now at my elbow. I haven't moved, just let her explore as she likes. Her fingers are light, barely touching, but exploring everywhere.

"What about you? You only talk about the guys and imprintees. Where is your family?"

"The guys and imprintees are my family. My mom died about two years ago."

Her hand stops and flattens out on my biceps, "Oh, Embry, I'm so sorry. What happened?"

"She had breast cancer. Dr. Cullen tried everything, but it was too far advanced when they discovered it."

Lillah resumes her exploration, but now she rubbing along my biceps. "I'm so sorry, Embry. I can't imagine losing my mom. But she must have been very proud of you, especially what you do for the tribe."

"She didn't know. She wasn't Quileute."

"What? But how did you keep it a secret? Why didn't you tell her?"

"I couldn't, one of the first commands Sam made when we all went through the change was we were forbidden from telling anyone. Including our parents."

"You couldn't even tell your parents? Embry, that's awful. Did your dad know?"

I don't want to discuss this, but at the same time, I need to explain to her, so she understands. "I don't know my dad. He had to be a Quileute for me to have the wolf gene, but my mom never told me who it was. I never wanted to know. My mom had her reasons for not telling me, so I always respected her wishes. Besides, it's not like I need a dad, I have Billy and the other guys. They've been more of a family over the years than I could ever hope to have through blood."

My face breaks into a smile, "Speaking of my wolf family, Seth told me today that he and Leah want to have a family dinner. They all want to meet you."

Lillah looks puzzled, "You mean I haven't met everyone yet? My gosh, how many of you are there. Is Leah Seth's imprintee?"

I shake my head, laughing at the idea, "No! And I would recommend you never say that again. Leah is liable to attack you. Leah and Seth are brother and sister. They are both wolves."

Lillah's hand is now on my tattoo, underneath the sleeve of my t-shirt. Her fingers are tracing the faint ridges of the ink. "Oh, that's right, Rachel told me about Leah. I forgot. But why do they all want to meet me?"

It's on the tip of my tongue to say _because you are my imprintee_ but I stop myself. "It's a rare occasion for someone to find out about us. The just want to get to know you."

She smiles shyly, "Oh that sounds nice then. When?"

"Don't know. I told Seth to have Leah coordinate with Emily. I'm sure Emily will tell you as soon as she plans everything."

Lillah nods then seems to think for a moment, "Do you think it would be inappropriate for me to reach out to Emily? See if she needs anything?"

"Absolutely not, I'm sure Emily would love the help." I move my hand from her hair, reaching back for her BlackBerry. I type in Emily's number, shaking my head when I see it's already in her phone. "Damn, they move fast," I mumble before putting the phone back on the table. "Call her, anytime. Emily really likes you. She doesn't let just anyone hold Eli, trust me."

My hand returns to her scalp, massaging gently. She sighs contentedly. Her hand moves from under the sleeve of my t-shirt. She slowly slides her fingers over my t-shirt, up to my shoulder. "Are you really close with Sam and Emily because Sam used to be your Alpha?"

"That, and Sam and Emily's house was like a safe haven in the beginning. We could all be ourselves there. Emily kept us fed. Once Jacob changed too, Billy joined in on the duty of feeding us. If we weren't patrolling or sleeping, we were at one of their houses."

"So why is Jacob your Alpha now and not Sam?"

"We had an issue come up a few years ago. Sam saw things one way, Jacob saw them another. Jacob left, split off from the pack. Leah and Seth followed Jacob. As things progressed, I couldn't stay with Sam any longer; I had to support my friend, so I split from Sam's pack and joined Jacob's. It has all worked out now, all is forgiven and such, but we still technically have two packs, Jacob's and Sam's."

"Wow. What kind of an issue could split you guys?"

"You can't guess?" I look at my watch, realizing it's well after ten o'clock. "Hmm, that story will have to wait until another day. Maybe I'll let Jacob tell you the tale, since it's really his story to share."

"Do you have to leave already?" Lillah stops the movement of her fingers, looking sad at the idea of my leaving.

"No, that's just a really long story." Her fingers start moving again, up my neck now, into my hair line.

"Oh, ok. So what about the cliff diving you mentioned earlier. You don't really dive off of cliffs, do you?"

"Yep, the cliff you were on yesterday, in fact."

"Embry! That is really dangerous! Why do you do that?"

I growl low in my chest when her hand tugs on my hair. My cock is instantly throbbing. While I have been aware of her hands all along, I've managed to keep my wayward thoughts to a minimum, focusing on our conversation.

I resist the urge to tug her down, to crush her lips against mine. I focus on the question. "Diving off the cliffs is a rush, and the cold water feels amazing against my skin. It's a stress reliever for me."

She frowns, thinking through my statement. "If it's such a rush, why were you freaked out that I was up there yesterday?"

My hand cups her face; I pull her down to lightly brush my lips against hers. The softness of her lips always amazes me. Just kissing her can both relax me and turn me on.

"Lillah, I'm practically indestructible. My job is to fight vampires. I was built to take them down if necessary. Cliff diving is nothing compared to a hungry vampire. You weren't made for that. The last 'normal' human that was up on those cliffs nearly died. It isn't safe for you up there. The thought of you slipping, or worse, you intentionally jumping, that's the kind of nightmares I don't need."

Lillah presses her lips to mine, whispering softly, "I'm sorry, Embry. I didn't mean to cause you nightmares."

I grin against her lips, "You don't cause nightmares, but you do torture me a lot in my dreams."

Lillah pulls back. She looks shocked. "You've- you dream about me?"

_FUCK. ME._

"Lillah, I told you earlier, you are the sexiest woman I've ever known. Of course I dream about you."

Lillah's cheeks turn pink and she ducks her head down, breaking our eye contact. I hear her mumble, "What about me?"

I'm shocked but also turned on, "You want to hear about my dreams?"

Lillah nods but still won't make eye contact with me, her hand once again wandering, down my collar bone and over each ridge and dip in my chest. I growl low, but try to focus, going back to my first dream of her.

"Hmm. A lot of my dreams have to do with your hot little mouth and all the torturous things you do with it. I never ask you, in fact I usually try to stop you, but you want to. In my dreams you like to torture me a little too much with that mouth and those hands of yours. Exploring, kissing, licking, stroking, and, like earlier tonight, biting"

I grin when I see Lillah's face changes from pink to bright red. I can hear her heart rate accelerating and can smell her arousal. Needing to stop this before we are back in the same situation as earlier, I smirk at her, "You know, it's only fun if we both share our dreams. Tit for tat, if you will. Next time, it's your turn to share."

Lillah's eyes are wide, but I can't tell if it's fear, arousal or some weird combination of both. I can't resist myself, "You really are the sexiest woman I've ever known."

"I bet you tell all the women that."

I sit up slightly, lifting her chin so our eyes are level, "Lillah, I've never told any woman that. But speaking of how sexy you are, why don't you show me what you are going to wear to school tomorrow. I hate to think of you distracting those teenage boys with fuck me heels and tight skirts. They are there to learn."

Lillah's brow wrinkles, "I don't wear 'fuck me heels'. And my skirts aren't tight, they are appropriate."

"Sure they're appropriate, if you are sixteen and have the song 'Hot for Teacher' stuck in your head."

Lillah slaps my arm, which makes me laugh, "Embry! My student's do not see me that way."

"Oh really? Is that so? You know how strong my sense of smell is?" Lillah nods, still frowning. "My hearing is just as strong, Lillah. I heard a few of the football players on Friday night talking about 'Ms. Hunter'. Trust me, they see you that way. You. Are. Beautiful." I lean forward and kiss her lightly, "And sexy as hell. Now show me your outfit."

I stand up, offering her my hand. Lillah hesitates, looking at the coffee table in the middle of the room. She stands up, reaching for something on the table before walking over to face me. She starts speaking while looking down at her clenched hands. "Um- so- I mean, now that we are friends, I thought it might be...appropriate to give this back to you. That is, if you want it. I understand if you think it's stupid."

Lillah opens her hand. Resting on her palm is the friendship bracelet from the Lucky Charms box I tossed on her coffee table a week ago. This gesture by Lillah is more than I could have ever hoped for. This beautiful, wonderful, amazing woman actually wants to be friends with me. It's silly, but this means more to me than probably anything she could have done. I'm so shocked I don't know what to say to her.

Instead of saying anything, I brush my thumb across her cheek, tilting her head until her eyes meet mine and simply nod. Lillah's face lights up in the most amazing smile I've ever seen.

Her free hand grasps my right hand, pulling it down from her face. She looks at the friendship bracelet, still in her other hand, over at my wrist and then back up to me. "Oh, Embry. I don't think it will fit your wrist. These were made for kids." Lillah turns my right hand over, looking down at my fingers before continuing, "How would you feel about a friendship _ring_? Would it be too weird?"

Her smile still lights up her face, even through her hesitation. I can't tell her no, when I think a friendship ring is even more perfect. Not wanting to scare her with how excited I am, I simply smile down at her.

She is nervous, that bottom lip pulled into her mouth. Leaning down, I kiss her gently until she leans in to my kiss, forgetting her nerves. I pull back slowly. When our lips are just barely touching, I speak quietly, "I think a friendship ring would be perfect. Thank you."

Lillah smiles brightly, looking back down at our hands. I follow her gaze, watching her twist the small bracelet a few times, until it resembles a large ring. Holding on to my right hand, she slides the friendship ring on to my ring finger. I try not to think of implications if she were sliding this ring on my other hand.

It's not my left hand, it's not gold, it's not fancy, and it's not a ton of people watching. It's my right hand, it's a toy, from a cereal we both happen to love, and it's Lillah and I alone in her living room. The simplicity of this moment makes it all the more special. The thought of re-creating something as simple and wonderful as this moment, watching her slide a wedding band on my left ring finger, me sliding a wedding band on her left ring finger, is so overwhelming that I'm thankful she is concentrating on our hands and not my face.

I do my best to compose myself before she looks up at me. Her smile causes me to smile. She stands on her tip toes to kiss my cheek, my right hand now in her left. "Now it's official, we are friends. You can't get rid of me."

"The same goes for you," I finger the bracelet she is still wearing. "We are officially friends now, you can't get rid of me. Now, I think my beautiful, sexy friend was just about to show me her outfit selection for tomorrow."

I start walking toward her bedroom, Lillah reluctantly following me. The room still smells of sex, which sets my cock to throbbing again. I release her hand and go to sit on the edge of the bed. Lillah stands in the middle of the room, her hands on her hips, staring at me.

"Embry, this is silly. I'm sure you must have misunderstood what those football players were talking about."

Her innocence causes me to chuckle, "Just humor me Lillah."

I lean back on the bed as she "Hmphs" and heads towards the closet. I can see her bending over. I contain my groan, but thoughts of that ass rubbing against my swollen cock earlier get me going again. _Yeah, definitely not a good plan for me to stay tonight._

Now that I know for sure she is a virgin, there is no way I can sleep with her. As much as I want her, _and boy do I want her_, I can't. That is something she should share with someone she loves, someone that deserves her.

Lillah stands up, holding up a thin black shirt with frilly stuff around the neck. "Are you going to wear a sweater over that?"

Lillah looks disappointed, "You don't like it?"

"I love it."

"Then why do you want me to wear a sweater over it?"

"It's so thin I can see your hand through it now. You'll get cold, your nipples will get hard, and, bam, a horny teenage boy's every fantasy come true."

Lillah's cheeks and neck turn red but she turns back to her closet. She pulls out a simple pale pink shirt. It has wide sleeves, a wide neck and looks like lots of extra material around the top. I'm guessing it would be fitted at the hips. My first thought is to tell her no, everyone will see my marks on her neck and shoulder. Then again, if those teenage boys see my marks all over her, maybe they will back off.

"That could work I guess. I'm assuming you'd wear pants and flats with it?"

Lillah rolls her eyes and places the shirt on the door handle before closing the door to the closet. "I'll give in to pants, but no flats. Simple black heels, I need all the height advantage I can get over my students."

Lillah looks at the bedside clock before turning to me. "How much longer do you have?"

"I have a while yet. I can at least stay until you fall asleep." I want to tell her I have all night, that I can stay with her without her worrying, but I bite my tongue. I tell myself I'm doing this for her, to give her some time to herself, but realistically, I'm just trying to prevent myself from making her mine.

"Ok, I'll be right back, I just need to get ready for bed."

While she's in the bathroom, I move to the other side of the bed from the alarm clock. I pull back the covers, but leave my clothes on. I have to leave tonight, no questions asked.

I close my eyes, letting the smell of the room and the bed surround me. I could get spoiled in this bed. It's soft, warm, and comfortable, just like Lillah. I wish I could spend every night here, with Lillah curled up next to me.

Lillah opens the bathroom door but quickly shuts the light out, practically running to the bed. This makes me laugh and I can't help but chide her a little, "Lillah, you do remember I saw you naked just a few hours ago."

She dives under the covers, turning off the light and setting the alarm before turning back to me. Her cheeks are once again bright pink. "Yes, I remember. But that doesn't mean I'm comfortable with you seeing my night clothes."

I pick the comforter up, looking at what she is wearing before pulling her against me. I chuckle briefly.

"You are probably right, Lillah. It's not a good idea for me to see you in purple satin shorts and a very thin purple satin tank top. Especially if you have any chance of sleeping tonight."

"Exactly, and I need to sleep. Stop that!" Lillah playfully smacks my hand that has managed to find its way under her top.

I smile against her neck, moving my hands to above the covers for both our sanity.

"Good night, Lillah."

"Will I see you- I mean, if you want- dinner."

"I'd love to, Lillah. Dinner, tomorrow night." I kiss behind her ear. "Now sleep."

It doesn't take long before Lillah's breathing evens out. I stay there, probably much longer than I should, just holding her. She rolls over to face me in her sleep and I just watch her face. She's so expressive, even in her sleep. She's beautiful. I can't believe how lucky I am to even have this little bit of time with her. I know my time is short, someone that deserves her more will come along, but until then, I want to spend every moment with her I can.

But not tonight. Even now, my groin aches being so close to her. I need some relief, even though it's not my hands I want touching me. But I know she isn't ready for that. I can't believe she just had her first orgasm tonight. I grin, remembering how quickly her second orgasm followed. The thought of any other man touching her like that nearly sets me off again. I can't stomach the thought of any other man being with her. Her making those noises for anyone but me.

With that thought in mind, I slowly slip out of her bed. This is getting so much more complicated every day. I want to be good enough for her, I want her to love me, but I know I don't deserve her.

I kiss her gently before walking out of her room. I find the hide-a-key and lock up behind me, phasing as soon as I hit the woods. I head straight home, not even bothering to get dressed as I walk out of the woods. I untie my pouch and drop it on the bed before walking straight into the shower. I cum quickly, even with ice cold water pelting my back.

Wrapping a towel around my waist, I return to the bedroom and start pulling my clothes from the pouch, but her scent hits me as soon as I open it. My cock is throbbing again, her smell surrounding me. _This is going to be a long ass night._

-0-

**A/N:** Raise your hand if you are dying over the friendship ring? Yeah. Us too. Don't forget to hit that little review button. We love hearing from you. If you are interested in seeing the top Embry picked out for Lillah, check out the link below. Also, links to the friendship bracelet can be found below. Eventually we will post polyvore's of outfits, but we figured you'd be more interested in chapters of the story.

Lillah's top: http:/www[dot]polyvore[dot]com/bardot_australia_womens_fashion_online/thing?id=13815814

Lillah & Embry's friendship bracelet/ring: http:/farm3[dot]static[dot]flickr[dot]com/2554/4145316821_d9841921ce[dot]jpg


	15. Chapter 15 Constantly Just Denying

**Chapter 15 "Constantly Just Denying"**

**Disclaimer:** Would SM have given you Chapter 13? Uh, no. So obviously, we aren't her. We just own Eli and that jerk Carter. And the idea for this story.

**A/N:** Welcome back! As always, thanks to our amazing beta dailyicandy! She puts up with a lot from us and still begs for more. Speaking of "Beg For More", that's the name of a little short story we wrote for the Alternate Shippers Challenge (http:/www[dot]fanfiction[dot]net/u/2333273/Alternate-Shippers_Challenge). Charlie (Team 'Stache, anyone else?) and Rose. Yeah, it's good stuff. Go read & then vote. But not until you read & review this chapter! Enjoy!

_Do you know how much you want it?  
You're trying to be cool about it  
You're trying to big about it  
You're constantly just denying  
You're like a moth to a flame  
__You hardly wane  
_"Beware of the Dog"_ - _Jamelia

**LPOV**

After Embry picks out an outfit for me to wear tomorrow that _he_ deems 'appropriate', I change into my favorite night clothes; purple satin tank top and shorts. I turn off the lights before jumping into the bed, feeling awkward after he saw me naked earlier. Embry, of course, has to tease me. If it were anyone else I might think they were being mean to me, but the more time I spend around Embry I'm learning that's just who he is. It's kind of adorable, if I'm honest with myself.

It doesn't take me long to fall asleep, Embry's arms wrapped around my waist. I don't know how long I'm asleep before he begins to slowly run his hands up and down my sides, tickling my skin gently. I smile but don't open my eyes before speaking.

"What are you doing? Coming back for seconds?"

Embry chuckles deeply and buries his face in my neck, "And thirds and fourths, if you'll allow me."

"You smell so good, Lillah," taking a deep breath through his nose and kissing my neck he continues, "And taste even better. I can't get enough of you."

I turn my face into his neck and run my nose along his skin. I slip my hands up his neck and into his hair, threading my fingers through his silky strands.

"I don't want you to ever feel like you've had your fill of me."

My words barely leave my mouth before he traps my lips against his, pulling my bottom lip into his mouth and nibbling. I shiver against his warm chest, his heat seeping through the thin satin of my camisole. My nipples harden and I groan into his mouth loudly.

Embry's lips smirk against mine before he pulls away from our kiss. He looks down at his hand as it moves up my stomach, bunching the material of my top with his actions. I can feel the trimmers in his hands as he tries to hold back, to take things slow. But that's the last thing I want. I need him now. More than I needed him before.

I press my chest forward, begging him to keep going when his hand slows a little.

"Don't stop, please. God, I love your hands."

Embry's hand begin to move again, sliding the silky fabric against my skin. He kisses across my collar bone, up my neck and then the corner of my mouth. I sigh deeply when he places his mouth over mine once more. He tastes like cinnamon and something that I can't put my finger on. His tongue glides along my bottom lip and without hesitation my lips to fall open. Embry growls into my mouth when my tongue touches his timidly at first, then his hands grip me tightly.

His fingers move up to my breasts, cupping them but avoiding my nipples until I tug at his hair in protest. He pulls his mouth away from mine just slightly and kisses me several times in rapid succession before pulling away completely. Staring into my eyes, his hand squeezes my breast gently. Then his fingers move up to gently pluck at my nipple, twisting it softly between his fingers.

A deep moan rolls from between my lips and my eyes squeeze shut. I can't take the torture that he's inflicting on purpose and I push him away, forcing him to roll over onto his back. I toss one of my legs over his hips and straddle him, smirking down at him.

"Lillah," he growls at me both playfully and as a warning, letting me know I'm pushing my luck. But I ignore it and shift my hips against his, pressing my heat to him, making both of us moan.

I lean forward to kiss him but something isn't right. I lift my head and look down, but all I see is pillow.

_It was a dream._ A cruel, cruel dream.

I check my clock only to find my alarm has been going off for at least an hour. That's never happened to me before but it must be what brought me out of my dream. I don't bother looking over next to me. I know Embry is gone. He didn't stay last night but I had wanted him to so badly, even though I knew of his responsibility to the tribe. I lift the pillow he used during the short time he was here; curling my body around it as I inhale his scent. I sigh and climb out of bed, quickly showering because I have no time for my morning run- _again_.

I'm already running late so I don't bother washing my hair, deciding to twist it up instead. I do a quick make-up job and throw on the clothes Embry picked out for me the night before. I quickly slip on my shoes, grabbing my purse and car keys and make my way to the door.

Thankfully, after hurrying through my morning routine, I actually make it to school at my regular time, which is still twenty minutes earlier than I'm required to be there. As is my norm, I swing by Rachel's classroom to say "hi" and chat before I get things in my classroom settled. I walk through the door of Rachel's classroom and snicker. She's dancing to a song playing through her headphones and doesn't have a clue I've walked in. I lean against the door frame and wait until she spins around. When she sees me she lets out a little yelp and then laughs.

I walk toward Rachel as she slips her ear buds out and turns off her iPod.

"Good morning, Dancing Queen," I giggle and do a little twirl as I walk over to her.

Rachel gives a little curtsy, giggling as she walks over to greet me, "Good morning, Hot Stuff. Aren't you a chipper little thing today."

"Yeah, I slept really well."

I shrug and sit down in one of the student chairs while Rachel watches me closely. I'm trying to be as nonchalant as possible because I know she's dying for some dirt, especially after our odd conversation yesterday.

"Hmm," Rachel squints and leans closer. "That's a cute blouse," Rachel observes as she lifts a hand and pushes the lace edge of my shirt aside. She gasps loudly and I frown at her reaction.

"Lillah!" Rachel whispers loudly, "What in the world are you doing wearing this? Didn't you notice the hickeys on your neck? 'Slept really well,' my ass. You got 'after wolf sex' sleep last night."

My mouth falls open and my face and neck begin to heat up immediately. Rachel lets go of my shirt, going to her desk and pulling open a drawer.

"What? I di-didn't," I stammer out when Rachel comes back, holding out a small mirror and placing it in front of me.

My eyes go wide when I realize that I do, indeed, have bruises all over my pale skin. The hickeys are up and down the side of my neck and trailing over my shoulder. But that isn't all, he left bite marks that are a vivid purple. It looks like we spent hours necking when in reality he didn't spend that much time at my neck.

"Don't tell me you didn't notice this morning," Rachel is tapping her foot, her eyes wide with worry.

"I didn't, honestly. I was running late and rushed through getting ready."

I lean closer to the mirror Rachel is holding up and I can't believe that he left so many places on my skin without me realizing it. The memories of what happened last night flood over me as I run my fingers over the marks lightly.

_I was horrified when Embry walked into my bathroom, finding me in the bathtub attempting to pleasure myself with thoughts of him, but failing. There had been a few times in my life that I'd even tried to do what he'd done but it had never turned out like that. He helped me to relax, then he helped me to orgasm; not once, but twice - just by using his fingers. He overwhelmed me, touching me everywhere, surrounding me, and holding on to me tight as my body finally found release. God only knows what it would be like to actually have him-_

I can see my cheeks turning bright red as I stop my train of thought there, knowing I can't think about that right now, not with Rachel here.

"Well he sure as hell marked you good."

I can't really argue with her there. He did leave quite an impressive display on my skin.

"He thinks my students have a thing for me," I blurt out. I don't know why I'm telling her this because she's only going to laugh and use it against me later. _That's what friends are for._

"I'm sure he's partially right. I get hit on all the time, and so do you, you just don't notice."

I'm shocked by her words. I've never noticed anything like that going on. Sure, I know the older boys watch Rachel and check her out but I've never seen them look at me that way. It would be both awkward and embarrassing to stand in front of them day after day if that were the case.

"I do not, Rachel. They are my students and I'm their teacher. It's nothing more than that."

"If you really believe that then you're crazy. Males love you. That much is evident by your neck. Embry left his warning loud and clear."

I'm taken aback by that statement and I look at her curiously. _Embry left his mark on me?_ I twist the friendship bracelet around my wrist, remembering giving Embry the matching friendship bracelet last night, my own little mark on him.

_When Embry and I stood up from the couch, I saw the matching friendship bracelet he had tossed on my coffee table a week ago. I was nervous, contemplating if I should give this tiny piece of cheap jewelry back to him. It seemed silly but I wanted him to have something that might remind him of me when we are separated. I picked it up and turned to him before I could change my mind. It was obviously too small to fit on his wrist so I looped it together a couple of times and slipped it on his finger, fashioning him a ring. When his hand was in mine as I slid the ring on his finger, I was hit with what our position could imply. I did my best to ignore the realization, but his beautiful long fingers were easy to imagine adorned with a simple band instead of the thread entwined piece._

I pinch my wrist to pull myself back to Rachel. I still don't understand what kind of warning she thinks Embry would want to give. I know she knows Embry better than I do, I'm hopeful she can help me out with understanding him better.

"Warning? Warning of what? That we're friends? Besides, he's not trying to 'mark' me, Rachel."

Rachel stares at me as she sees me again running my fingers across the skin on my neck, "He's not? Why else would he want to make sure he left something there for them to see? I know these wolves, Lillah. I know how their minds operate."

I drop my hand to my lap, "You're wrong, Rachel. I'm sorry to tell you that nothing like that is going on with Embry."

"Really? You make out with all of your friends?" Rachel takes a seat next to me.

"Well, no," I sigh loudly and wrinkle my nose at Rachel.

"I didn't think so," Rachel smiles smugly at me and leans back in her chair.

"We didn't make out," I roll my eyes.

"Oh? So you just had sex with him?"

"What? No!"

My face begins to heat up again and I look away from her. I'm still shocked Embry realized I was a virgin, and his reaction to the information.

_When he pulled me into his lap and asked about my virginity I wanted to climb under the covers and hide. I wasn't sure what Embry's reaction was going to be. The way I saw it, he could go one of two ways. Either he would realize he just wanted to be friends and nothing more, due to my inexperience, or he would think the reason why no man had touched me before was because I'm a frigid woman, like Carter always told me I was. _

_I was prepared for those two reactions. However, Embry surprised me, he didn't mind, even stopping me when I started to apologize for my lack of experience. My heart skipped a beat when he called me 'baby', but immediately dropped again when asked me about my college boyfriend. I only briefly mentioned Carter, not wanting to ruin the moment or my good mood by discussing that jerk._

"Why not?" I'm pulled back from my memories by Rachel's question. I force myself to remember what we were discussing. Once I do recall, my face brightens again.

When I turn to Rachel, she honestly looks confused by my denial.

"Rach, I have to go prep my classroom. And I'm not discussing that with you here. See you at lunch?" I ask as I stand.

"Yes, but I think this development calls for a little back-up. Let's go to the diner," she stands as well and pulls the clip from my hair, allowing it to fall down my back.

"A little coverage, just in case." Rachel snickers and shoves me toward the door.

"Thanks!" I roll my eyes but return my focus to her last statement, "Back-up?"

"Yep." Rachel walks over to her desk and grabs her cell phone, "I'm texting Emily and Kim now to see if they can join us."

"Rachel, that isn't necessary," I don't want to bother the other women, plus, I'm not sure how much of this I should share with them.

"It's totally necessary; now get out of my classroom! I don't want you in here looking all satisfied after a night with a hot wolf when my students come in here. They might get bad ideas!"

I shake my head, laughing as I scurry down the hall to my classroom. I try not to think about what she said, but I'm distracted the remainder of the morning, constantly running my fingers over my neck where I know the bruises lie.

-0-

Rachel and I go to our normal spot at the diner. Since I skipped running I'm going to have my normal: water and a grilled chicken salad. Unfortunately, Heidi is working the lunch shift today, including our table. She's super sweet to Rachel but when she turns to take my order her smile quickly turns into a scowl. _Just because Embry and I were holding hands on Friday?_

After she walks away I can't take not knowing any more. I lean across the table and whisper to Rachel, "Did Embry ever date our waitress, Heidi?"

"No!" Rachel's eyes are wide and it looks like she's trying to hold in a smile. "Why would you ask that?"

I shake my head, still whispering, "I'm sure it's nothing, but Friday when we were leaving here Heidi gave me a really weird look. And just now, she was really nice to you but barely said two words to me."

Rachel shrugs, "Price you pay to be with these guys."

"What?" I sit back in the booth, making sure my hair is covering my neck.

"Other women judge us because we are with these beautiful men. I think Heidi has shown interest in Embry in the past, but he's always ignored her," Rachel shrugs, like it's normal for a man to not return the interest of a young woman. She leans forward, speaking low, "The women he used to 'date' were never from around here."

Before I can respond, Heidi drops off our lunch. At the same moment, Emily slides into the booth, sitting next to me. Emily puts in an order to go plus a cup of coffee. Heidi grabs the pot from behind us and fills Emily's cup before walking away.

Emily takes a sip of her drink, "Kim couldn't join, and she said it's crazy today at the clinic. And I can't stay long; I have to go balance the books over at the shop. When I left, Sam was pulling all the receipts from the past month. He is terrible about keeping up with things. I hope Eli doesn't distract him too much from getting everything pulled."

I take a bite of my salad and nearly choke when Emily looks at me and grins, "Spill."

Rachel jumps in while I take a drink of water, filling Emily in on what happened this morning. When I set my glass down Emily asks to see the marks. I pull my hair back and she shakes her head.

"That boy. Rachel, I don't know if he was trying to mark her. You know how these guys are, sometimes in the moment they forget their strength. And Lillah has really pale skin, she probably bruises easily. You saw her face on Saturday, just a little beard burn left her chin red a day later."

"I had make up on to cover that up," I frown. I thought I had done a better job covering it.

Emily smiles, wrapping her arm around my shoulder and hugging me, "I know you did sweetie, but I'm an expert at beard burn. I love when Sam goes stubbly. You did fine covering it, I just recognized it."

"Lillah, Embry wasn't too rough with you last night, was he?" Rachel looks concerned.

I blush brightly as I remember last night. I try not to compare Embry to Carter but since he was my only relationship, it's hard not to. Carter would have never tried anything like what Embry did with me last night. Even if Carter had, I doubt it would have been anything like Embry's hands on me. He was so gentle and caring where as Carter, wasn't.

I shake my head emphatically, "No, absolutely not! Embry was nothing but gentle with me."

Emily narrows her eyes at Rachel, "How could you even ask that, knowing-. Besides, you know I'd hunt down any of these guys if they ever hurt a woman. Or, I'd have Sam hunt them down."

"I just wanted to double check," Rachel says defensively, "I'm with you, and I'd send Paul and Jacob after anyone that hurt any of my friends."

I can't help but smile at how protective Rachel and Emily are, especially since they are talking about sending three massive wolves after anyone that might hurt me. I giggle at the image of Sam, Paul, and Jacob as wolves chasing down Carter. Of course in my imagination, Embry is leading the group of wolves as they attack Carter.

"What are you giggling at? Remembering how your neck got to looking like that?" Rachel grins at me as she finishes up her lunch.

"No, it's nothing, just an overactive imagination."

"Uh huh. Somehow I don't believe you," Rachel grins.

Emily nudges me, "So are you going to tell us what happened last night or not?"

I shrug, pushing my salad away, "Embry came over for dinner. While we were waiting for dinner to finish cooking he- we- uh-."

"Made out?" Rachel supplies.

"Um, yeah, I guess," I can't help grinning as I remember him telling me he liked me biting him. _I definitely need to remember that for the future- that is, if something like that happens again in the future._

"And you both enjoyed yourselves?" Emily is grinning as she asks this question._  
_  
I nod, but stop when I remember Embry didn't get to have the same level of _enjoyment_ as I did last night. A shiver runs down my spine as I remember feeling him so hard against me. To think that maybe I'm what caused that to happen- it's mind blowing. When he told me later that he'd be happy to help me any time I was excited to think he wanted to continue down this path. But I quickly became anxious and unsure of myself when he mentioned he'd like my help if I was willing in the future. Feeling him is one thing, but I don't know if I could touch him, if I'd be able to bring him that same pleasure. I'm scared but excited to think he would want me to help him like he helped me._  
_  
"Alright, so you made out and you both enjoyed yourselves. What else did you two do last night?" Rachel is smirking. I know she wants every detail, but I'm doing my best not to tell her everything. I want to make sure last night stays special. Part of that is not telling her everything that happened.

"We had dinner," I smile and shake my head. I managed to save the overcooked chicken, but just barely. It was dry and tasteless, but Embry didn't seem to mind, and I was so focused on enjoying my time with him that I barely noticed how terrible it was.

"And...?" Emily asks.

"We talked," I can't help my grin over the remainder of the evening. It was perfect.

_After dinner we settled ourselves on the couch. Embry surprised me by leaning back against me while we talked. And we really did talk; it wasn't just him trying to 'get into my pants'. We asked each other question after question, making an effort to get to know one another and, I'm hoping, build a solid friendship. Carter never bothered to just hang out with me, to ask about my family and friends and why I wanted to become a teacher. Yet another difference between the two men; Embry seems genuinely interested.__Embry was full of questions, some a little embarrassing but others I could tell were real concerns for him. We took turns, asking questions, making observations. The more I learned about him during the course of the night, the more I wanted to know about him. He told me about his family only briefly and it made my heart ache for him, knowing that he doesn't have his parents to turn to like I do. He seemed so thankful for his friends, like they are his family - maybe one day he'll count me amongst that group._

One of the things that struck me most was him not being able to tell his mother about being a wolf. I was saddened for him but also surprised. Even now, sitting at the diner talking with Emily and Rachel, they've all opened their arms and embraced me. It doesn't make sense that they would be so willing if I'm not supposed to know anything. _Why would I get to know and be a part of this when Embry's mom couldn't even know? _As much as I appreciate it, enjoy it even, being a part of this tight knit group of friends, it just doesn't seem to fit. I would think they would do everything in their power to avoid telling me anything new.

"Come on Lillah, can't you give us any more details?"

Emily looks at her watch, frowning, "I'm sorry girls, I have to run. We'll talk soon! Lillah, if I see Embry, should I mention I saw you today?"

"Do you mind not mentioning?" I want to beg her not to say anything, but I think this might be the easiest way.

"My lips are sealed!" Emily grabs her order from the counter and dashes out.

"Crap, we have to get back too, come on," Rachel and I toss some money on the table and leave. As I get behind the wheel, I'm thankful I managed not to tell Emily and Rachel everything that happened last night. I like being able to keep it in my head and analyze there. I'm not quite ready to share everything.

-0-

That afternoon I called my mother on the short drive home from school, just to touch base and let her know I'd call her later. Rachel follows me home, her excuse being that she'll be bored at home because Paul is working late but I know better. She was not satisfied with what I shared at lunch; she wants more details about what happened with Embry. Lucky for me Angela is home when we get there and Rachel can't ask me anything that will be too revealing of the wolves. The three of us sit in the living room for a while and they decide to gang up on me. _So much for getting lucky with Ang being here._

"How's Embry, Lillah? I haven't seen him in a couple of days."

"He's fine, Angela. _You_ haven't been here in a couple of days," I grin and wink at her, making her blush.

"Touché! Sorry about that, Lill."

"No worries. I was just teasing you. I don't begrudge you spending time with Ben. I'm really happy for both of you."

"Thanks," Angela clears her throat and glances between me and Rachel.

"What's going on with you and Embry?"

"Yeah, Liiiillah, what's going on?"

I give Rachel the stink eye for acting clueless as she sings my name.

"Embry and I are just friends."

"Oh," Angela looks disappointed at that. She was pretty determined to try to find me a boyfriend for a while; she even tried to set me up with a friend of Ben's - Mike Newton.

"That's because Lillah won't let it be anything serious, right Lillah?"

"Shut up, Rachel. You know why I'm leery. Both of you know why actually."

"Lillah, just because Carter hurt you doesn't mean that Embry will," Angela tells me earnestly. I don't say anything; I just look at her and nod before turning to Rachel.

Rachel looks at me for a long beat before finally speaking.

"Embry would never hurt you, Lillah. He would do _anything_ to protect you."

Before I can say anything Angela gasps and rambles something about being late and that she'll see me later. She's off the couch and flying toward the door before I can reply. But she stops at the door and calls back to us, "Tell Embry I hope to see him again soon, preferably clothed! And I promise to knock on your door going forward. Don't want to walk in on _that_ again!" The door slams behind Angela as I hear her laughing.

"Lillah," Rachel says my name, pulling my gaze away from the door, "what is she talking about?"

Looking down at my hands, unable to look Rachel in the eye, I speak slowly, "Um...Angela might have walked in on Embry and me yesterday morning."

"Wait, yesterday morning? As in, he stayed Saturday night after the bonfire?"

"Well, I don't think he meant to stay the night, but yeah."

"So, Embry stayed the night here and you didn't think it was something important you should tell me? What exactly did Angela walk in on?"

"We were just kissing, that's all, I swear."

"You were just kissing, but you were both NAKED?"

Rachel cocks an eyebrow at me and my blush intensifies so much that the tops of my ears feel like they are burning.

"No! We both had our underwear on. But when Angela came in, Embry was so surprised he practically jumped out of the bed, throwing the covers off of us. He was really upset too, said he didn't hear her coming."

Rachel grins, "Yeah, Paul gets a little distracted too when we are together. The guys don't like to let their guards down," Rachel pauses for a second before looking at me more closely. "He really stayed here all night?"

"Yeah, why? What's the big deal?" I shrug my shoulders, trying to act like I think it's nothing, him staying all night. But the truth is, I'm just as surprised and confused that he didn't leave, as Rachel is.

"That means Embry missed patrols on Sunday; he has _never_ missed patrols. Ever. Paul jokes about how he makes them all look like slackers. Even when his mom-," Rachel cuts herself off.

"We talked about his mom last night," I reassure her when she looks hesitant.

But her tone and the words caught my attention and I can't help but ask what she means, "He's _never_ missed patrols? How can that be?"

"He told you about his mom? He hasn't talked to any of us about that."

Rachel pauses, almost like she's considering her words carefully, "Lillah- Embry is really dedicated to the tribe. And, as far as I know, he's _never_ spent the night with a woman."

"Whether it was an accident or not, him staying here, missing patrols, spending the night with you- Embry really cares for you. I hope you know that. He would rather die than see you hurt. They are all very protective of us."

Rachel frowns, still lost in whatever train of thought is going through her mind.

But suddenly, her face lights up with a smile, "You won't believe what Paul told me happened at the football game!"

I'm still thinking over Rachel's observation of Embry's feelings for me and everything she's just shared about him. I barely have time to process all of this before she launches into something else.

"Embry heard some of the Forks football players talking about you. Paul heard them too but he said that Embry nearly phased up in the bleachers, he was so angry. Apparently he would have taken out the entire offensive line had Paul not been there to stop him."

"I know. I mean, Embry mentioned it but he didn't tell me what he heard," I'm surprised to find out Paul heard the football players talking too. Maybe Embry wasn't imagining things, but still, I'm sure he was blowing their statements out of proportion.

"Paul was telling me the things they were saying. He said that if they'd been talking about me like that he would have ripped their heads off," Rachel shrugs at me like it's not a big deal.

"Oh my-, these are high school boys. He's being ridiculous. We are just friends and I don't need him to defend '_my honor_'."

"Oh Lillah, it doesn't matter, he feels responsible for you now. There's no way he'd allow them to talk about you like that. Fantasizing about you in a cheerleading uniform, and talking about the 'quiet ones' being wild in bed-"

"How embarrassing," I say, cutting her off. I don't want a visual of myself in the short skirt and tight top our girls wear on their tiny bodies. And I certainly don't want to think about what else they might have been saying about me.

Rachel sits on the other end of the couch and watches me for a few minutes. Now that Angela is gone Rachel gets herself comfortable so that she can _really_ dig in with questions.

"So what's up?"

"What do you mean?"

"Between you and Embry."

"I've told you, Rachel, there's nothing going on."

I shake my head and laugh lightly, hoping to diffuse and distract her from trying to dig too deeply. I'm a little nervous about what she is going to bring up, or point out to me.

"Lillah, I'm not blind. I've seen the way you look at him. And I see your neck," Rachel smirks and nods toward my exposed skin.

I quickly try to make an excuse, "Things just got a little out of hand."

"A 'little'? Looks like more than a little to me. Now spill it. Pretty please?"

Rachel is practically begging, pouting out her bottom lip and giving me puppy dog eyes. I shake my head at her and go over everything in my mind before speaking.

"Embry and I are friends and have agreed that _if_ something sexual happens we'll let it run its course."

"Friends with benefits, huh? I don't see that ending well, Lillah. I know that I haven't known you all that long but I can't imagine you being okay with that."

"Okay with what? Enjoying my time with a handsome, caring, gentle man?"

"No, that's not what I mean. I'm happy that the two of you are friends but I- I don't want you to get too deep if you aren't going to allow it to be more than a friendship," Rachel props her feet on the coffee table and I shake my head at her.

She nudges my arm and looks at me with concern, "What if you fall in love with him, Lillah?"

I scoff at her, _as if it's impossible for me to fall in love with him. As if I'm not already afraid that maybe I'm falling for him. I'm doing everything I can to deny it altogether, to both myself and Rachel. I don't want her worrying about me or giving Embry a hard time, which I'm sure she would do in a heartbeat if she felt like it was necessary._

"I'm not going to. I'm not that naive. Sure, I'm attracted to him, and it's all new to me, but I know he's not interested in a real relationship."

"So you're having sex with him and then after that's done and over with, what? Are you going to go back to being 'just friends' with him?"

Biting my bottom lip, I try to consider her words and think carefully before answering. I honestly don't know what I'll do if that happens. Can I just be friend with him after the things that have already happened between us? I can't really allow myself to think about that right now. I push it to the back of my mind and focus on what I want to say to her.

"First of all, I appreciate you being there for me and I value your opinion and friendship but it's not your business what Embry and I are doing, Rachel," I pause and sigh, hoping that I don't hurt her feelings by saying what I'm thinking.

"Secondly, _if_ I have sex with him it will be my choice. If it comes to that, choosing between being friends and having a benefits relationship, I do hope that he and I will remain friends."

"Okay," Rachel nods and sits silently for a few seconds.

"He has amazing lips. And hands."

I tell her this wanting to give her a little bit of info because I know she's itching for at least something and I can't deny her. Plus, I want a little bit of girly giggling about a guy that I might have a little crush on. _Or a big massive crush._

Rachel places her hand over her mouth and stifles a giggle, "Yeah, I know all about talented lips and hands."

I laugh at the dreamy expression on her face. I'm sure I've had that same look more than a few times today. I can't even make fun of her for it because Paul affects her the same way Embry does me. I sit in thought before I make the decision to tell her partially what took place last night.

"Embry sort of caught me in the bath last night."

"Oh, this is going to be good, I can just tell," Rachel drops her feet to the floor and turns to face me. I definitely have her full attention now.

-0-

I go through bits and pieces of the story, leaving out the details that I don't really want to share with someone, even with someone that has now become my best friend.

"You _bit_ him? Way to go, Lillah!"

"Oh God," I mutter and bury my blushing face in my hands.

"I bet he loved it. Those boys like it a little rough at times," Rachel nods her head enthusiastically. "Paul also really likes it when I-"

I stop her before she has the chance to continue her train of thought. The last thing I want is to imagine Paul in any kind of sex act, regardless of how hot he is.

"NO! I don't want to know what Paul really likes, Rachel."

"Fine," Rachel rolls her eyes at me.

"So how big is Embry's cock?"

If the floor would just open up and swallow me whole, I'd be perfectly content. I'm shocked at the things that Rachel can sometimes spout at me. I do the fish mouth before I'm finally able to make my brain function enough to speak.

"RACHEL! I can't even talk to you about this anymore," I really have to avoid that particular subject. I don't know how I'll explain to her that he didn't even ask me to reciprocate; therefore I don't know anything about his- cock.

"Besides," I tell her, trying to change the subject, "I'm supposed to be making dinner. Embry is coming over later."

"You are no fun, Lillah. This conversation was just getting good," Rachel complains.

"Sorry," I tell her and stick my tongue out playfully.

Rachel smiles but I can tell that she's fighting it, trying to pretend that she is angry with me.

"I guess he'll probably be here soon anyway. Now that he's switched shifts with Seth he'll be patrolling in the afternoons with Jacob. My guess is he'll probably be spending a lot of his evenings here."

"Wait. What? They switched shifts? _When_?"

"Yesterday, during their impromptu meeting. He didn't tell you?"

"No. He kind of let me believe he was leaving last night so he could patrol."

"He really is an idiot."

I don't say anything while I process this information. I shake my head, frowning. _Why _hadn't _he stayed last night?_

"Just answer me one more thing?"

I nod hesitantly because I'm now focused on something else.

"How did you not know that wearing that blouse today would show off his bite marks?"

"I didn't know they were there and Embry picked out my clothes last night before he left."

Rachel's mouth drops open and she gives me a death stare before jumping into a list of reasons why I should never allow Embry to do that again. In the middle of Rachel's tirade I glance up and notice that Embry and Jacob are standing in the living room. I squint my eyes at him now that I realize what he's been up to. _That little sneak._ After the details Rachel gave me about what had taken place at the football game and her telling me Embry didn't have to patrol last night, I am less than pleased with him.

My face was flaming with embarrassment before but now it's full of color due to my anger and annoyance. _How dare he try to control me like that?_ I don't go around biting him- okay, I kind of did, but that was different. I didn't trick him into wearing something so that other girls would see it and know that he's mine. _Not that he _is_ mine._ I also didn't lie to him about something as stupid as my schedule. If he didn't want to stay the night, he should have just told me so.

I'm upset that he would trick me on purpose, to try to prove to _teenagers_ that I'm not 'available', as if I'd be interested in them anyway. I'm _furious_ with him though, because he lied to me. Not outright maybe, but it was a lie of omission and that hurts me more than anything. I've been lied to before, for years, by someone that I thought might respect me, if not care for me. For Embry to hide something, it hurts me more than it ever did when I found out about Carter's cheating. Admitting that to myself makes me not only angry with Embry but myself as well.

I stand to face Embry and Jacob, my eyes narrowed. I take a deep breath and try to control my temper before speaking. I clench my jaw, gnashing my teeth together to keep from raging at Embry.

-0-

**A/N:** BUSTED! Don't forget to click that little review button! We love to hear what you think!


	16. Chapter 16 Good As Dead

**Chapter 16 "Good As Dead"**

**Disclaimer:** SM does not reside here. We do own Eli and assface Carter, plus the storyline, but everything else is SM's.

**A/N: **HUGE thank you to Amanda for the Pwns of the Week rec on Fictionators last week! (http:/www[dot]fictionators[dot]com/pwn-of-the-week/pwns-of-the-week-71510/) WOW doesn't even begin to cover it. We obviously have a love of this story, but it's very humbling to know y'all love it too! Also, we are always around to talk about "Losing Control"; you can find us on Twitter (StupidLeeches) or on our website (www[dot]stupidleeches[dot]com). Other links to find us can also be found on those sites. Finally, an extra large thanks to our beta dailyicandy. She rocks our socks off. Enjoy!

_I turn my head_  
_I can't shake the look you gave_  
_And I'm good as dead_  
_Cause oh those eyes are all it takes_  
_And all I want is you_  
"Under Control" - Parachute

**EPOV**

"Hey Embry, what are you doing having lunch alone? Want some company?"

I grin when I look up from my lunch to see Emily. She is heading towards Sam's office, carrying Eli on her hip, but stops next to the table.

"Hey Em! Good to see you. What are you doing here?"

Emily lifts a bag which looks like a to-go order from the diner, "Just going to eat my lunch while I balance the books. Someone has to take care of the money around here. You guys are fabulous mechanics, but terrible book keepers!" Eli starts squirming in her arms so I quickly jump up from my seat to take him from Emily.

"Hey buddy, you want to start working here? You'd be a way better mechanic than that silly Quil," Eli giggles as I swing him around.

"Sit down before you drop him." Emily takes a seat, smirking at me, "It was great having Lillah join us at the bonfire on Saturday. Did she have a good time?"

Returning to my seat, I start bouncing Eli on my leg, a small smile escaping as I remember Saturday night, "Yeah, I think she did."

"I still can't believe Eli fell asleep in her arms, she's a natural. I think I'd let you to babysit with Lillah there," Emily winks at me.

"Of course you would," I can't help but roll my eyes at her.

"Hey!" Emily eyes me, "I saw that eye roll! Now, tell me, if Lillah had such a good time on Saturday night, why do you look so terrible?"

Of course Emily would notice how I look. Even without Sam's patrols this morning, I barely slept at all last night, the dreams waking me up constantly. I'm sure the exhaustion shows on my face.

I glance down at Eli, who has grabbed my sandwich; his little hands are now covered in mustard as he sticks the top slice of bread in his mouth, "He's drooling, like a lot."

"He's teething, just let him gum on the bread, he'll be fine," she waves her hand dismissively. "Now stop avoiding my question. You looked so much better on Saturday, it's only Monday! What happened, did you and Lillah have a fight?"

Unable to look Emily in the eye, I stare at my lunch, "No, things are fine with Lillah."

"Liar."

"I'm not lying. We didn't have a fight, things are fine with her," When I look up at Emily, I'm surprised; she looks like she understands what I'm going through.

"You know, Embry, you and Sam are a lot alike. I'm a little biased, I think Sam is the most handsome of all you guys, but I'd probably say you are a close second. You are both VERY stubborn and hard headed, when you make up your minds, that's it." Emily slams her fist down on the table like a gavel, causing Eli to jump, "Sorry baby boy, didn't mean to scare you, but you know how your Daddy is, what he says goes and there are no questions."

Eli smiles then Emily adds, "Unless, you are Mommy, and then, you know how to change Daddy's mind." Eli claps his hands on the mushy bread and giggles.

Emily looks at me again, smiling, "You know I love Sam completely, but sometimes, he makes the wrong decision, and while he may have made the decision for the right reasons, he doesn't always think about all of the consequences of that decision."

"Ok, so you're saying I'm making a bad decision by protecting Lillah?" I take the bread slice from Eli, tossing it in the nearby garbage can.

Emily hands me a wipe to clean up Eli, shaking her head at me, "No Embry, protecting Lillah is very important, whether or not she's your imprintee. She knows our secrets, so of course, she is vulnerable, I understand that."

I'm thankful that Emily is not pushing me on the subject of imprinting. I don't have it in me to fight with her right now. I nod in agreement with her, not saying anything, but allowing her continue.

"But you know you can't protect her from _yourself_, right?" Emily slides her hand over her scarred cheek, "Embry, even in the absolute worst moment of my life, I wanted to be with Sam. The physical pain I could deal with, but not having Sam there with me all the time is more emotional pain than I could ever imagine."

Emily stands up, grabbing her unopened lunch then reaches for Eli, "Embry, don't make decisions for Lillah _without_ asking Lillah. You can only know how those decisions will affect you. Lillah is in your life now, and like it or not, your decisions have consequences for both of you. Don't assume you're the only one that is miserable when you two are apart. You might think you are protecting her from you, but you can't stop her from having feelings for you, or, from wanting to be with you."

"Emily, I'm sure Lillah doesn't-"

Emily is once again moving towards Sam's office, but stops in the doorway, eying me, "Don't ever assume you know what is going on in a woman's heart or mind."

Emily waves as she walks out. I'm too tired right now to think about what she just said. I quickly finish off my lunch so I can get back to working. The sooner I'm done working the sooner I can see Lillah.

-0-

Paul walks into the shop a short time later, after his patrol shift. Now that I'm patrolling in the afternoons instead of evenings, it's time for me to head out.

When Paul walks up to me, I assume he just wants to debrief, but he nods toward Sam's office, "Before you go, I need to talk to you."

"What now?" I ask, following Paul into the small office, surprised when he closes the door.

"Rachel and I were talking last night...about you and Lillah."

"Fuck! Does she know I imprinted?" I'm anxious about the other imprintees finding out. I know I need to be honest with Lillah, but she and I are just now becoming comfortable with each other. I don't want to chance her freaking out, _or laughing in my face._ I know she deserves so much better than me, and it's not like she'd want to spend her life with me.

"No man, she doesn't know."

I relax slightly, as I take a seat by the desk.

Paul leans against the desk facing me, "Don't get too comfortable, you aren't going to like what I have to say."

"What the hell?"

"Rachel was telling me some of the stuff Lillah has shared with her about her ex."

"That fucker Carter?" I growl out, remembering the text he sent her last night. I want to teach that douche a lesson.

Paul nods, "Yeah, after what Rachel told me, man, _I_ want to kick his ass."

I know I'm not ready to hear what Paul is going to tell me, but if it has to do with Lillah, I need to know, "Just tell me."

"Man, from what Rachel said, he was only dating her because of her parents."

"Yeah, Lillah told me that much last night. She said he cheated on her most of the time they dated, he never made her feel sexy, and he only wanted to touch her when he was drunk. Like I said, he's a fucker," grinding my teeth I recall everything Lillah told me last night; I can't believe she ever dated an asshole like that.

"Wow. I'm impressed she shared all that with you. Rachel said it took her weeks to get Lillah to tell her about Carter. I guess she feels safe enough with her wolf to open up," Paul smirks.

"I'm not _her_ wolf, just tell me what else Rachel said," I grumble. Paul's words only serve to piss me off more.

"You sure as shit are her wolf, whether you accept her or not. You are just as perfect for her as she is for you, don't forget that. She feels bound to you and there is a pull to share things with you, neither of you can deny it."

I lean back in the chair, exhaustion hitting me, I don't want to argue with Paul over this. "Whatever, the point?"

"My point is, the reason why he never made her feel sexy is because he spent most of the time they were dating telling her what all was wrong with her. He wanted a piece of arm candy along with the status she brought him."

I sit up straight again, "What do you mean 'telling her what all was wrong with her'? There's nothing wrong with her!" I'm pissed that he would even say something is wrong with _my_ woman.

"I agree, Lillah is hot, but apparently this asshole was looking for a supermodel. He regularly told her how fat she was, he even gave her gym memberships for her birthday and holidays."

"What the fuck? She isn't FAT!"

Paul is rolling his eyes, "Don't get me started. Like I said, when Rachel told me _I_ wanted to go find the piece of shit."

Now I understand why she runs and eats so little, that fucker make her hate herself; her beautiful, lush, curvy, made for driving me crazy body.

"That's not the worst of it, Embry." Paul frowns as he looks at me.

"What could be worse than calling her FAT?" I can't contain my growl as I speak that last, disgusting word.

"He also told her on a constant basis how cold she was. He would never- erm, he would never touch her," Paul tells me awkwardly. "But he would expect her to 'service' him, usually when he was drunk."

It takes everything in me not to drive to Seattle in that moment and find him, "Do you know if she did- God, did she touch him?"

"I don't know, man. Based on what Rachel told me, it sounded like the few times she would give in to his demands; he would pass out before she could get started."

I don't even realize I'm holding my breath until I exhale, relieved by this, "Thank God for that."

"Fucking cold? How could he even say that about her?" I'm so enraged by this guy. Why would you put down someone you love? And if he didn't love Lillah, then why did he waste his time trying to make her into someone different?

"You don't actually think she reacts to other men like she does to you, do you?"

"No, but come on," the memory of Lillah riding out her second orgasm last night is clear in my mind, "she is anything but cold."

"For you, she is anything but cold for _you_." Paul stands, heading toward the door. "I just thought you should know what you are dealing with man. It might take more than just a few well placed compliments to get her to understand how you feel about her. You are fighting against all the things that asshole told her over the years."

"Fucking piece of shit, the worst part, he still texts her too."

Paul spins around, "What? Rachel never told me that."

"He sent her a text last night." The text is burned in my memory, I easily repeat it for Paul, "_You won't ever meet someone as good as me, I know you miss me._"

"How did you find out?" Paul is back in front of me now.

I shrug, "Lillah left her phone in the other room, she asked me to grab it for her, and his text was right there. It took everything in me to not write back telling him she's mine now and to back the fuck off."

"What did Lillah say? You did ask her, right?"

"I asked her alright. She told me he wasn't worth our time. Now, I want to kick his fucking ass."

"Let me know when you do kick his ass, I want to be there to help. Nobody messes with our women. No one." Paul is heading out the door back toward the shop, but turns around, "Oh, forgot to tell you, all was clear on patrols today, see you later man."

"Later, thanks Paul. If Rachel tells you anything else, mind sharing?"

"I'll share what I can." Paul waves as he walks out.

-0-

Memories of the dreams last night haunt me as I patrol that afternoon. I knew last night would be a long night without Lillah, but I hadn't been prepared for the turn of direction my dreams would take.

There were still the very sexy dreams, but interspersed amongst them were nightmares: Lillah jumping off the cliffs, Lillah slamming the door in my face and telling me she never wanted to see me again, Lillah laughing in my face as she purred against another man, asking me how I could ever think she would lower herself to be with someone like me.

The worst though was the fear in all the dreams of never being this happy again; the pain of her rejecting me would be hard to deal with, but I feel like I could live through that, as long as I knew she was happy. The pain of never seeing her smile again, never seeing her eyes light up when I'm near her, never feeling as comfortable as I felt last night, just talking with her; that, will be the end of me. _I guess that was what Emily was trying to tell me earlier, but there's no way Lillah could feel that same way about me...could she?_

Sadly, I have resigned myself to the fact that I will never make love to her. As selfish as I am, that's a line I can't allow myself to cross. Her being a virgin, it's too much, I can't take that from her; she should only give it to the man she loves. If I were to allow myself to have her I would never be able to let her go when I was forced to, or when she finally finds someone worthy of her. As much as I wish it could be, I'm certain that will never be me.

I'm slowly padding my way along the boundary line. While I had watched Lillah last week during Jacob's absence, I knew from Seth that Jacob was more prone to patrol around Forks, since Ness is there. Not wanting to double our coverage, I decided to stick with the reservation this afternoon.

Out of nowhere, I feel teeth wrap around my neck as a large mass knocks me to the ground. I'm so surprised it takes me a moment to recover. Finally, I look up, realizing its Jacob, I aim for his jugular, snarling and retaliating quickly. Jacob is faster, running deeper into the forest. Chasing after him, I'm not paying attention to where he is leading me, my focus sharp on revenge.

I stop suddenly when I see Jacob has phased back to human form and is standing in my path. The temptation to knock him over in his more vulnerable state is strong, but I resist, knowing he will get revenge later. I phase quickly, my fists up as I stalk towards Jacob, "What the fuck was that for?"

"That was for being a complete douche and not taking our generous offer of spending quality time with your imprintee. Instead, being the proud, stubborn, ass you are, you left her last night. All I see while patrolling is you moping around like a lost little puppy dog. I know none of those things I saw Lillah saying to you in your mind happened last night. Which means your pansy ass left her. You tucked your tail between your legs. You're scared of letting her in, scared that she might actually like you. Though honestly, right now, I don't know why the hell she would."

"Jacob, you don't know-"

Before I can say what Jacob doesn't know, he cuts me off, going into a full tirade again, "What don't I know Embry? I've seen Paul and Jared go through this; I've seen Sam's memories. I fucking know about the nightmares of her rejecting you. Every moment I exist I fear Ness walking away from me, not accepting me. You're not unique, not even in your stubbornness."

"Fine, all the other assholes had to deal with this, but I'm sure none of them had to deal with their imprintees being a virgin."

"What the _hell_ are you bitching about? Of course Lillah's a virgin, she's your imprintee."

I'm floored by this statement, "What the hell does being an imprintee have to do with her being a virgin?"

"You really haven't been paying attention over the years. You are better at blocking us out than I suspected. Every single imprintee has been a virgin. She may have had some sexual experiences, but she has never _been_ with a man. It's part of the gift."

"Our imprintees are a gift? I have to beg to differ," I crack a small, sardonic smile at this thought.

"Yes. Gifts. As best as I can figure it, the spirits, God, the fates, whatever you want to believe in, bring the imprintees to us as a gift, for all the shit we have to sacrifice to protect our tribe. These women give us sanity, they help us stay human. Best of all, they aren't 'used' gifts, every one of the imprintees has been a virgin. Think about it. As upset as you are right now, imagine knowing some other man had touched Lillah."

I can't contain the growl that escapes my chest. Jacob frowns but waves his hand, "My point exactly. These women were made just for us. No matter what has happened in their lives until they meet us, they have somehow managed to resist the charms of other men. Almost like they were waiting for us. Obviously it's easier with Ness; she's lived a more sheltered life. It'll be the same case for Claire, but Rachel, Emily, Kim, and now Lillah, they've all had temptations, but have resisted for some reason, deciding to wait _for that perfect man_."

I'm shocked. I never expected this. I guess I always just assumed the other imprintees had some sort of sexual experience, but hearing Jacob explain it, it makes sense.

"Really? They were all virgins."

"Yes," Jake rolls his eyes. "Now would you put your fucking clothes on then explain why the hell you tortured yourself- and me, thanks asshole- leaving her last night?"

I quickly pull on my clothes then lean against a tree. My arms crossed, I glare at Jacob as I speak, "Seth was right about you; you dig into our minds a little too much."

"Dig? Man, there was no digging involved. You were practically shouting from the rooftops how sure you were that Lillah was going to abandon you. Damn, those dreams really got to you, didn't they? For all of our sanity, please, go have a fucking sleep over with her. Though why you refuse to fuck her baffles me."

I look away from Jacob, only now realizing where we are. Jacob brought me to the area of the forest just behind Lillah's house. Taking a deep breath, I finally respond to Jacob, "Because I can't take that from her, that should be reserved for the man she loves."

"You really are a complete and utter moron. I had hoped it was just your stubbornness, but no, you really are that fucking stupid."

"Just because she's my imprintee does not mean she loves me. It doesn't mean she'll ever love me."

"You're right. But watching her with you, seeing how she acts around you. Hell, seeing how much happier your fucking ass is when you've been around her. That isn't because she's your imprintee. It's all because you two love each other."

"Jacob, I can't love her, I've barely known her a week."

"Yet, after a week, you are moping around during patrols, preparing yourself for her imminent departure from your life. You've barely gotten to know her and you are already expecting her to leave, because you didn't stay with her one night. Did she kick you out last night?"

Shoving my hands in my pockets, I kick the ground with my big toe, "No. She actually gave me an out. After I explained about our little meeting yesterday, she felt so bad that I got in trouble 'because of her', she said she understood why I couldn't stay."

"And let me guess, you didn't correct her."

I shake my head, but still feel the need to explain to Jacob, "I was so on edge after-," I clear my throat, as the memories of last night bombard me. I can't control the small grin that escapes. "I found out she was a virgin; I didn't trust myself to be able to simply _sleep_ next to her. It was just easier to not correct her and have that as the excuse why I had to leave her."

"You are such a fucking martyr. Please tell me you have learned your lesson and after one night of hell you are going to correct her."

"Yeah, I'm planning to have dinner with her tonight. If I can, I'll explain about the change. Hopefully she won't kill me," I roughly shove my hands through my hair, the exhaustion from last night and the nightmares still fresh in my mind. "How do you deal with knowing she could find someone better than you at any moment?"

Jacob shrugs, "Ness? By being there for her all the time and giving her everything she needs."

This is probably the most confusing thing Jacob has said so far, "How do you give Ness everything she needs? Don't the Cullen's give her everything she needs? I mean, compared to the Cullen's, or Lillah's parents, we can't give them what they can."

"The Cullen's can buy Ness anything she _wants_, but that doesn't mean they can give her what she _needs_. I'm sure it's the same with Lillah. Buying stuff won't make her happy. I don't know Lillah all that well but I don't see her as the type of woman that is only into material things," I don't say anything to correct Jacob's assumption. Lillah may not seem that way, but that's how she grew up, what she is accustomed to.

Jacob continues when I remain silent, "Just being around Ness, playing games, going for picnics, spending time with her, that's more important than buying stuff. Don't get me wrong, I wish I could buy her all the things the Cullen's can, but she doesn't need all that stuff to be happy."

"Yeah, I guess." Thinking about not needing to 'buy' stuff reminds me of Lillah and her Camaro. I grin broadly, my pride in Lillah bubbling over, "You won't believe what Lillah told me last night about her Camaro."

"What?" Jacob is laughing at my sudden change of topics.

"Her dad apparently bought that car from a junk yard and they rebuilt it together. She actually rebuilt that car, that's crazy, right?"

Jacob grins and shakes his head, "Not crazy, sounds about right that your perfect woman would be able to rebuild a car." Jacob seems lost in his thoughts for a moment before smirking, "I wonder if Ness would be interested in rebuilding a car with me. That's not a bad idea, thanks man."

I laugh at Jacob's excitement, "Yeah, of course."

I quickly pull my cell phone out of my back pocket, checking to make sure Lillah hasn't texted me, surprised when I realize how late it is getting. "Hey, mind if I bail? Since I'm already here, I wouldn't mind getting a little extra time with Lillah."

Jacob shuffles his feet a little before looking up at me sheepishly, "Uh, yeah, that's fine, but, you might want to wait a little longer before you head over."

"Why?"

"Uh, my sister is over there right now."

I'm running through the trees, heading straight for Lillah's house before Jacob even finishes speaking. I hear him mutter "shit" behind me but I'm not paying attention. I know Rachel is one of Lillah's best friends but she is also meddling in our relationship. I hear Jacob running behind me, but don't stop until I approach the back door, swinging it open wide as I run into the house.

I can clearly hear Rachel speaking as I walk into the living room, Jacob following me in, "Oh my God! Lillah, you let him pick out a top that screams 'hands off, she's mine'. I know, you are just friends with Embry, but you have to understand, these guys, they like to take care of us, but they are also possessive. Don't ever let him pick out your clothes, unless, of course, you _want_ to show off what he does to you."

_I'm so screwed._

I want to go to Lillah, but the look on her face stops me in my tracks, Jacob nearly runs into me due to my abrupt halt in the middle of the living room. She looks embarrassed; no doubt Rachel has been asking her all kinds of questions.

But there's more, her eyes were wide when she was looking at Rachel, but when she sees me enter the living room; they narrow, nearly to slits. I can just make out a small sliver of grey behind her glasses. The combination of the glasses and the glare makes me nervous. I would understand if she was upset, but this is more. I'd almost guess she was angry with me, like the red-head in her is just dying to rage at me.

"Lillah, I can-" Lillah lifts her hand, still looking at me with those narrowed eyes. Taking in the rest of her face, I notice her lips are flattened out in a frown, and it looks like she's grinding her teeth. Even though they have faded a lot since last night, I can see my marks on her neck and shoulder. There are a couple of distinct teeth imprints that have turned a light purple color plus random blue and purple areas all over her neck and shoulders, probably small, faint hickeys.

When I picked the shirt out last night, I knew my marks would be visible, but I thought she would be able to cover them up a little, or at least they would be faded enough they wouldn't be visible from far away. Apparently, I was wrong.

Behind my back I hear Jacob mutter, "Idiot." He's obviously noticed Lillah's new neck accessories as well.

"We will discuss this later." Lillah speaks through clenched teeth.

Turning to Jacob, she smiles as brightly as she can under the current circumstance, "Hello, Jacob. How are you today? Can I get you something to drink? Eat?"

"Hey Lillah, no, I'm good." Jacob looks at me. He's obviously confused and not sure what to do, a rare occurrence for him.

I turn to Jacob, saying as calmly as I can, "Please take your sister home. I will forever be in your debt."

Jacob slowly nods then walks over to the sofa, wrapping a hand around Rachel's arm, gently pulling her up until she stands.

"Fine, I'll leave. Whatever. Lillah is my _friend_ too, Embry. Deal with it. Oh, yeah, Lillah, Emily texted me this afternoon. Emily and Kim are coming over for dinner at my house tomorrow; we are planning the family dinner this weekend. We'd love to have you join, my house around six tomorrow."

Rachel walks toward the front door with Jacob following behind her. She pauses just as she's about to exit the room, turning and grinning wickedly at me, "Sorry, Embry, no boys invited. You can't have Lillah to yourself every night."

Neither one of us says anything until we hear the front door close. I open my mouth, ready to explain myself, but Lillah beats me to the punch, literally.

Lillah's tiny fists start slamming in to my chest. It doesn't hurt me, but I grab her hands to stop her, since I know it has to be hurting her.

Lillah pulls her fists from my hands only to start pushing me away from her. Her eyes are locked on mine as she starts in on me, "God, Embry. Did you really pick out this shirt so it would show off what you did to me?"

"No, Lillah-"

She looks away from me for a moment, so I quickly pull her against my chest. We are barely touching, but I need to feel her. She is shaking her head against me, still using her free hands to smack my chest, "What the hell were you thinking? Who do you think you are? You have no right- God, what are my co-workers going to think of me now? If Principal Green had seen me- UGH! I could have been fired, Embry. Do you even care?"

"What? Of course I care," I'm so taken aback by the idea of her firing I can't think straight. This was definitely not the reaction I was expecting. Yell at me about it being embarrassing, yes, lose her job, never.

Lillah pulls away from me again; just a step but I feel the loss of her touch down to my toes. With her hands on her hips, she is again glaring at me, "If Principal Green had seen me before Rachel did this morning- Hell, if any other co-workers or students had seen me before Rachel, they could have run straight to Principal Green. I'm supposed to set an example for these kids."

"Lillah, what you do in your free time isn't-"

"It is if it looks like I'm acting like a teenager with hickey's and bite marks, Embry. Did you even think about what could happen to me? Or were you too proud of your little stunt to think about me?"

"No! Lillah," I shake myself out of my shock, and frankly, my surprise at how angry she is; pulling her against my chest. I look her in the eyes when I speak, "I didn't want to get you in trouble. I swear. I just- you didn't hear those football players the other night. I just wanted them to back off."

Lillah steps away from me yet again, walking toward the couch, "You wanted them to back off? Really? That's your excuse? Geez, Embry, thanks for that. I mean, every day when I walk into my classroom they just start humping my leg."

"I wouldn't put it past those horny little bastards," I mumble underneath my breath.

Lillah whips around, the glare returning to her face, "Those are my students you are talking about. Anyway, you have NO room to talk."

"I'm a wolf, not a dog, I don't hump legs, and I know they are your students, but they are also teenage boys and you are sexy as hell. Trust me, I don't blame them for their dirty thoughts about you, I have quite a few myself."

Lillah flops down on the couch, leaning her head back. She looks exhausted, like today has just completely worn her out. "Embry, I don't know what you think you heard, but I promise you, my students don't see me that way. I don't need your help in making them back off, because there is nothing going on."

Approaching the sofa slowly, I kneel down in front of Lillah. I rest my arms on either side of her legs, but don't touch her. When she opens her eyes, I can tell she's surprised to see me so close, "Lillah, I mean this as your friend, so don't get mad at me."

"Ohhh-kaaaay." Lillah speaks hesitantly, slowly, but at least she is looking at me and not pushing me away.

"You are an idiot. Or, more accurately, whoever first told you _they_ didn't find you sexy is an idiot. I promise, I'll try to forget about your students drooling over you, but they do Lillah. You are a stunningly beautiful woman and whether you believe it or not, you are sexy as hell."

Lillah shakes her head, smiling sadly, "We'll just have to agree to disagree on that point, Embry, and no more picking out my clothes. It isn't your responsibility to 'protect' me from my students."

"Fine, no more picking out of clothes." I grin wickedly before continuing, "But can I have a preview?"

Lillah leans forward, tentatively placing one hand against my cheek. "No, not for a while, you've been bad. You also don't get to drive Candy for a while."

"I guess that's fair," I can't help the smile that crosses my face. I can feel Lillah's anger subsiding.

"Why can't I stay mad at you?" Lillah glares at me again, but this time she is smiling, so I know I'm no longer in trouble, "You are getting off way too easy."

I nod, leaning my face into her soft hand, "I know I am. Thank you. I'm sorry, baby. I never meant to get you in trouble."

"You look so tired," she whispers as she inspects me closer. "Why don't you rest while I get dinner started? I mean, if you want to stay for dinner," Lillah looks at me hesitantly while the fingers of her free hand lightly sweep under my eye.

My eyelids involuntarily close at her soft touch. "I'd rather help you cook dinner. That is, if you'd like some help."

"Sure, I'd love some help, I'm going to go change quickly. You can rest for a few minutes if you'd like, or grab a beer from the fridge."

Both of Lillah's hands move from my face to my hair. She lightly runs her fingers through my hair until her hands cup the back of my head. She scoots to the edge of the couch until our lips are nearly touching. I'm dying for her to kiss me, but instead of closing the distance, she speaks, "You need to thank Rachel for keeping you from being in even more trouble, mister. You are very lucky she saw me first thing this morning."

I move my hands to mimic hers, my fingers sliding through her silky fire and gold hair until I'm cupping the back of her head. I tug her toward me, needing to feel her lips against mine, sighing when our lips meet. I don't let myself get lost in her kiss, though it takes all of my concentration to prevent that from happening.

Pulling back slowly I grin when I see the familiar flush against her skin. "Fine, I'll thank Rachel for saving both of our asses today. Do I want to know what she said or asked you today?"

"No, you don't want to know. Just some girl talk, you would have hated it," Lillah smiles wide, looking at my lips briefly before leaning forward, brushing her sweet lips against mine. When she pulls back, she slowly slides her hands down to my chest, pushing gently until I lean back far enough for her to get up from the couch.

"I'll just be a few minutes, make yourself comfortable." She grins at me as she walks away, and I debate following her, but I don't want to push my luck.

I move to sit on the couch, leaning my head against the back and resting my feet on the coffee table. I smile remembering growing up, my mom used to yell at me about putting my feet on the coffee table. I'm sure Lillah will bite my head off when she returns, but she told me to make myself comfortable, and I definitely am right now.

My tired eyes close on their own. I don't intend to fall asleep, but the next thing I know I'm dreaming.

-0-

Lillah and I are racing, she is convinced she is faster than me, at least, in my human form. Of course, I let her believe that, holding back a little as she runs ahead. She turns back to look at me, a small frown on her face, "Are you holding back? Come on Embry, this needs to be a fair race!"

Before I can respond, a man jumps from the trees surrounding us on our run. I was so distracted watching and teasing Lillah I didn't notice the sickly sweet scent of the vampire. The vampire that managed to split Lillah and I up by jumping onto the path between us. I'm sure he smelled me, but he's looking at Lillah running ahead of us.

Lillah looks back again, realizing I've stopped running. When she sees the red eyes watching her, she gasps and turns to look at me, fear evident on her beautiful face.

"Go home baby, I'll be right there."

The vampire laughs, "Don't go anywhere, I'm going to finish off your man and then I'm coming for you, _baby_."

I scream at Lillah to run, as I phase, my scream turns into a howl. The vampire turns to me, my howl distracting him from Lillah for a moment. I start running toward him, he's barely moved after seeing me phase, so I easily reach him. Before he can turn and run, I knock him over, sinking my teeth into him, but he recovers quickly, jumping up and running for the trees.

As I run after him again, I'm howling as loud as I can. I need to let Sam or Jacob know where we are, so they can come join the fight. I need their help to take this vampire down. But I'm also trying to make Lillah move, hoping she'll understand in my howling I'm trying to tell her to run. As I left the path, she was still standing there, a look of complete shock on her face.

As I chase after the vampire, I'm praying one of the guys gets here soon. I chase after the leech, following his meandering route through the forest, simply keeping an eye on him until the other guys join so we can destroy him. He breaks through the trees just a few feet ahead of me. As I hit the edge of the tree line I howl again, this time in desperation.

Lillah hasn't moved, she's still standing right where I left her as we started this chase through the forest, only now the vampire has caught her. He gives me an evil smile as he leans down toward Lillah's neck. "Mmm, this human does smell delicious. I've heard rumors that virgin blood tastes much sweeter. I can't wait to find out!"

I'm screaming in my head, howling out loud and running as fast as I can, needing to get to the vampire before his teeth break Lillah's beautiful unmarked skin, before the venom gets into her bloodstream.

-0-

**A/N: **Raise your hand if you liked hard ass Jacob. Yeah, us too! We are planning a follow-up to Losing Control, it will be Jake/Ness. As much as we are dying to start writing that story, we are giving LC our complete focus right now. But promise, it will happen. Don't forget to hit that little review button, let us know what you think! We reply to reviews and even pimp our favs over at http:/twificpimps[dot]blogspot[dot]com/search/label/hump%20wednesday!


	17. Chapter 17 No End In Sight

**Chapter 17 "No End In Sight"**

**Disclaimer:** No SM here. If we were SM, there wouldn't have been a fade to black. We would have had Edward ripping that pillow all to shreds and it would have been hot, know that.

**A/N:** Short note this week, just a reminder that we are always around to talke about "Losing Control" or any of the other stories we've written. You can find us on Twitter (StupidLeeches) or on our website (www[dot]stupidleeches[dot]com). Other links to find us can also be found on those sites. As always, thanks to our amazing beta dailyicandy (daily[underscore]i[underscore]candy on Twitter) who pushes these chapters through like a mad woman! Hope you enjoy!

_The thing about you is you know just how to get me  
You talk about us like there's no end in sight  
The thing about me is that I really wanna let you open the door and walk into my life  
__Move in a little closer  
Take it to a whisper  
Get just a litter louder  
Say it again for me  
Cause I love the way it feels when you are telling me that I'm the only one who blows your mind  
_"Say It Again" - Marie Digby

**LPOV **

I shuffle my feet into my bedroom, part of me hoping Embry follows. I want to change into comfortable clothes, but I don't want to leave him. I can't believe how tired he looked, like he didn't sleep at all last night. More than that, I'm stunned by the conversation we just had. I was ready to kill him, but somehow, his reasoning made sense. _What is going on with me?_ As much as I wanted to, I couldn't stay mad at him. He was acting so stupid, trying to protect me from my students, but I can tell he was set on believing whatever he heard on Friday night.

Shaking my head at the insanity of today, I pull out a pair of yoga pants and a tank top. Pulling off my clothes, I hesitate when I get to my bra. I usually forgo one when I'm lounging around the house, but with Embry being here I think that is just asking for _'trouble'_.

As I'm pulling on socks I notice a noise coming from the living room. It sounds like whimpering and then howling. _Bizarre._ Since I don't have a dog I can only assume that it's the TV, or Embry. As it gets louder and more urgent I hesitantly go into the living room, worried about what I might find.

Embry has his feet propped on my coffee table and is leaning back against the couch. His eyes are clenched tightly in sleep and his head is thrown back, mouth open. The sounds coming from him frightens me and I rush to his side, not wanting to get too close but needing to touch him. I place a hand on the side of his face, saying his name gently, not wanting to startle him. His lips form an "o", his cheeks pull in as a howling sound rips from his lungs, so violently it startles me. The sound is almost indescribable, like he's in excruciating pain.

"Embry, wake up, Embry."

I scoot closer to him, gripping his hand tightly in mine, hoping that the contact will end the agonizing sounds escaping him. He calls my name in between his howls. It sounds like he's even more terrified than he did with just the howling.

"Embry! Embry wake up! Embry please! Please, Embry, it's Lillah! Please wake up!"

He jerks awake, jumping from the sofa, looking around the room frantically before pulling me to him. His body is shaking as he wraps his arms around me tightly.

Embry buries his face in my neck, moving my hair and the strap of my tank top out of the way. I hear him inhale deeply as I feel the tip of his nose move up my shoulder and over my neck, the sensation sending shivers down my spine. I wrap my arms around his bare chest, placing my hands on his back where I feel his muscles tense beneath his hot skin.

He strokes my hair gently and is silent while he holds me. I can feel his heart pounding against my cheek. I rise up on my tip toes, placing a kiss against his neck, where I can see the veins pulsing, under his skin. I give him time to calm down before I consider saying something to him.

_To say that I'm worried is an understatement, I have no idea what he could have been dreaming but it sounded bad, very bad. It scares me that he could be this upset over a dream._

Finally, Embry pulls back, loosening his grip on me, but still holding me close. When he looks down at me, his eyes are serious and wide with worry.

"Promise me, if I ever tell you to go home, or to run, you will."

"Yeah, of course, Embry." I can't help the worry in my voice as I lean back into him, "What was that all about?"

"Just a dream." I can tell he's still upset; his muscles are still tight under my hands.

"Embry, it didn't sound like just a dream." I'm so worried about him, I've never seen him like this, "Is that why you were avoiding sleep last week? Why you look so tired today? Because of nightmares?"

"It's fine, Lillah. That was probably one of the easier nightmares I've had lately." Embry gives me a sad smile before going serious again, "Just please, if I ever tell you to leave or run, you have to; I'm not saying it to be an ass. There really are monsters out there, and the more I'm here or you're around me, the more danger you're in."

I nod slowly, wanting to comfort him as much as possible, but I still have no idea what it is that has him scared. He pulls me back into his chest and I rest my head once again against his rapidly beating heart. "I promise, Embry."

It's obvious that whatever it was he was living in his dream has him freaked out, completely. Embry doesn't move for a while, he holds me tight against his chest, stroking my hair. I don't know if it's helping him, but I can feel myself relaxing as I hear his heartbeat slow down.

Placing a kiss over Embry's heart, I finally, slowly, yet regretfully pull away from him. We stare at each other for a moment and he looks almost disappointed at the loss of contact.

Wanting to change the mood, I take his hand, turning towards the kitchen, "This is probably a silly question, but, are you hungry?"

"That _is_ a silly question. Especially since I barely had time for breakfast this morning and only had half a sandwich for lunch. Eli drooled on the other half." He is grinning down at me as he follows me into the kitchen.

I chuckle at the image of Eli drooling on Embry's sandwich, "Poor Embry, losing your lunch to a baby. My gosh, you must be wasting away to nothing. No wonder you are having nightmares, your brain is disoriented with the lack of food." I tell him sarcastically.

"That must be it. Please save me from these terrible nightmares. Feed me, Lillah." Embry's laugh sounds more like a bark, but it makes me feel better to see him laughing and smiling.

"Come on then, let's figure out what to eat for dinner." I pause as we enter the kitchen, looking back at him. "Would you do me one favor though, Embry, before we start cooking?"

Embry smiles warmly at me, tugging me closer to him again, "Sure, whatever you need."

I can't look him in the eye as I make my request, my cheeks already turning pink before I even speak, "Would you please put on a shirt? It's very distracting, um, with you not- I mean, you are-"

"You are way too good looking for my sanity," I whisper, huffing when I hear him chuckle. Pulling away, I focus on what to cook for dinner, trying to ignore the handsome man in my kitchen.

"All dressed." Embry is standing behind me now. I turn to look up at him and, even though he's dressed, I'm still so attracted to him I can barely focus on what he's saying. I smile when I notice he has his friendship ring on again. I guess he took it off while he was patrolling. When I look back up at him I realize he's waiting for me. He grins when we make eye contact, "And I could say the same thing about you. You are way too good looking for my sanity."

"Please, I don't hold a candle to you in the looks department." It does weird things to me when he lavishes me with compliments. Other than my family, I'm not use to things like that being said to me, least of all by a man like Embry. He is so handsome, sweet and smart that I can't look at him for too long. It makes my heart hurt a little bit and he takes my breath away. I need to change the subject, now.

"How's spaghetti sound? With bread and a salad?"

Embry actually rolls his eyes at me, "You're right, you can't compete with me on looks, you are so much more beautiful than I am, and it's not even a contest. And spaghetti sounds perfect. I'm assuming I'm on salad and bread duty?"

"Wrong and right."

"Fine, agree to disagree, for now. But I will convince you one of these days. So other than Rachel, how was your day today?"

We start working on making dinner together, Embry working on the salad and bread while I cook the noodles and started the sauce, "My day was ok. I overslept, so I didn't get to run this morning. Plus, because I was running late I didn't see the little stunt you pulled of picking out a top that showed off your handy work from last night."

Embry doesn't say anything, but I can hear him chuckling. I stop stirring the noodles, narrowing my eyes at him again, "It's not funny."

"Come on, it was a little funny."

Wanting to get back to what I saw in the living room, I clear my face, looking at Embry as innocently as possible, "It wasn't funny. Know what else wasn't funny? Hearing you howling just now."

"Howling? I don't howl when I'm human. Only in wolf form, silly Lills."

I stop, unable to concentrate as I realize Embry has given me a nickname. Not wanting him to know how much that means to me, I return to the conversation, "You were just howling in my living room. Very loudly, I might add."

"You must have been hearing things." I can see Embry is focusing on the finishing up the salad, and not looking at me.

Turning to the sink, I drain the noodles as I respond, not wanting to look Embry in the eye when I admit what I saw earlier, "Yes, I heard things, and then I walked in and saw you thrashing around on the couch with very loud, very clear, howls, coming out of your mouth."

Embry shrugs as he tosses some cheese on top of the salad, "Hmmm, I normally don't howl, it must have just happened because I was in wolf form in the dream, chasing a vampire."

"You don't howl? At all?" I'm frowning as I stir the spaghetti sauce. I know what I heard, and he was definitely howling.

"No, not that I can think of." Embry takes the salad over to the table then returns to stand next to me as I finish up the spaghetti, "We usually give a little call to announce ourselves in human form to each other. But it's not a howl."

Turning the heat off the spaghetti sauce, I turn to him, smirking, "Hmmm, I'm thinking before I can let you eat this wonderful dinner we've prepared, I'm going to need you to give me a howl."

"You won't feed me? But I'm starving, Lills." Again with the nickname.

I turn around, pulling two wine glasses and plates down from the cabinet, handing the plates to Embry, "I will feed you, as soon as you howl. A good loud howl. Red wine ok?"

"Yeah, red wine is fine," he's shaking his head as he sets the plates on the table next to the silverware.

I resist smiling when I see Embry is holding a chair out for me. I set the glasses down on the table, holding on to the wine bottle with one hand while the other rests on my hip. I can't help grinning as I tap my foot, "Well, let's have it."

"Fine. Although I really don't understand why you want to hear this," Embry close his eyes.

He's quiet for a few seconds, but then he takes a deep breath, leans his head back and- melts me into a puddle. This howl has a different sound than the one that I heard while he was sleeping. This one is more intense, more raw, and predatory and it goes straight to the juncture of my legs. My eyes glaze over as I watch him. I grip the wine bottle in my hand, squeezing it tightly. My whole body is singing and it makes absolutely no sense that I would react to him _howling_. But good Lord, I can't help myself, he has me tingling everywhere. I really want to forget dinner altogether and pull him into my bedroom for another round of-

Embry pulls me out of my revere by prying my hand off of the wine bottle. He brushes his lips against my neck and my knees start to shake when his gruff voice rumbles in my ear, "Let go of the bottle before you break it, Lillah. I take it you liked my howling?"

_Oh God, did I like it? Stupid question._

"Too much for my sanity," I breath out before I can stop myself.

My neck goes red and I feel it drifting up to my face, scorching hot. Embry is laughing, but he doesn't say anything about my embarrassing display as he seats me.

I dish out the food, making sure to add much more food to Embry's plate than I would ever consider eating. I can barely hold the plate up as I hand it to him, the food overflowing. Embry frowns when he takes the plate and glances over at mine, "Aren't you hungry?"

"Starved," I glance down at my plate, which has barely has any spaghetti on it, mostly salad, "but since I skipped running today, I shouldn't eat too many carbs. Better to fill up on salad. More spaghetti and bread for you."

"Are we going to have to have this talk again? You don't need to lose a pound, you are beautiful just as you are. Eat some spaghetti, one day of skipping running won't kill you."

He's complimenting me again and I don't know what to say. Compared to the food he inhales I'm sure my meager portions don't seem like much but it's enough to fill me. I can't look him in the eye, but manage to mumble out, "Actually this was day two of skipping running. Someone keeps distracting me."

"Even two days won't kill you. You look great. But, if you are so worried, how about I start running with you?"

When I look up again, Embry is grinning wide, like a little kid. The idea of him wanting to join me for a run thrills me, but I don't want to get my hopes up too much. A little part of me is still worried he's going to just stop wanting to be around me, that he isn't going to want to spend time with my any more. I know if that ever happens, it will kill me. This man has managed to completely take over my life, but even so, I don't want to assume he has time to spend with me.

"Embry, I usually go running before school, like before six in the morning."

"I know." Embry has finished all of his salad and is half way done with all the spaghetti on his plate.

His words sink in and I realize what he means, "Oh, right, because you were watching me last week without telling me."

Embry shrugs but doesn't say anything. I can't help smiling at him.

I take a small bite of spaghetti, shaking my head when I see him smile, "If you want to join me on a run, you are welcome to, if you think you can keep up."

We continue to tease one another, laughing at our silliness. We move on to other subjects as we eat and I find myself immersed in him again, just as I was the night before. Embry fascinates me, mind and body.

I remember his remark about vampires and ask him to tell me more details about that side of the fictional world I've found myself living in. It's still hard for me to wrap my mind around some of this, even with seeing Paul turn into a wolf.

Embry doesn't tell me much, but he does give me a brief description: bright red eyes, cold, pale skin that is hard like stone, unbelievably fast, and, as he describes it "disgusting smelling, sickeningly sweet".

As we finish eating, Embry pours the last little bit of wine into my glass, clearing the dishes from the table. "You cooked, I'll clean."

I hop up on the counter next to Embry since he insists on doing the dishes. I lean my head back against the cabinet behind me and close my eyes as I sip on my wine. Being here with someone else reminds me of my grandmother and the times that I spent here with her. I can't help but smile as I start telling Embry about her.

"My grandmother used to put me up on these counters, especially when she was baking; cookies and pies, anything that she had to roll the dough out. She would hum a song or tell me about her life, giving me nibbles of dough while she worked. Even as a I grew older we had the same tradition. Times like this I really miss her."

"She sounds like an amazing woman."

"Mmmm." I lean my head back against the cabinets. Memories of today are floating through my mind and I return to what Rachel said about Embry's patrol shift being changed. How he decided not to tell me about it last night. I feel stupid when tears spring into my eyes.

"Lills, what's wrong?"

"Rachel told me something earlier, and I can't figure out-" I glance down at my wine glass, which is now sitting on the counter next to me. Even not looking at him, it takes everything in me to whisper out, "Why didn't you stay here last night?"

"What? What did Rachel say?"

I'm having a hard time trying to confront him. I know it shouldn't be that big of a deal but it hurts me to think that he's hiding something. I need to just say what I'm thinking so that I don't waste my time and eventually, my heart, on someone that might not be interested in me.

"Well, Rachel told me about your patrol shifts getting changed, that you are patrolling in the afternoons now. She also said the change happened during the meeting you had with Sam and Jake yesterday. Which means, you knew last night you didn't have to patrol. You could have stayed." It's still baffling to me that I'm so desperate for him to stay with me when I've only known him for a short time.

I finally pull myself together enough to look up at him again, but as soon as my eyes meet his, I'm scared to hear what he is going to say. I can't handle looking at him, so I return my gaze to my hands, "Did I do something wrong? I mean- what we did- I did, was that why you didn't tell me? Was it so bad that you didn't want to stay? Please don't lie to me Embry. I know what I am, I know guys aren't really-"

"STOP!" Embry sounds so angry when he interrupts me. My only thought is that I've screwed up again, somehow pushing the boundaries that he doesn't want me near.

"Embry, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have-"

"Lillah, please, stop. Listen to me." Embry places his hands on my face and runs his thumb across my cheek bones. He's so gentle. Even with his size and knowing what he can shift into, he's never rough, always kind. As Embry counts out his reasons I watch him, studying his face closely, searching to see if he's being honest with both me and himself. The last thing I want is for him to say things that he thinks I might want to hear and not what he's really feeling. I need him to tell me the truth more than anything.

"There are a couple of reasons why I didn't stay. First, I didn't want to assume you wanted me to stay."

I nod but mumble, "My friends are always welcome to stay here."

"Second, I wanted to give you some time and space, since I knew what happened last night was a big deal for you."

My heart aches at this reason. I didn't need space, space was the last thing that I needed after our evening together. I wanted nothing more than for him to stay with me, to cuddle up next to his heat, his arms wrapped around me all night long. I wanted to wake up next to him this morning, even if what occurred last night was a onetime thing. I can feel my cheeks heating up again remembering everything from last night. I can't respond to him on this reason, not without revealing how much I need him around.

"Third, and finally, I didn't trust myself."

Hearing Embry explain his final reason for not staying, I'm surprised. I wrinkle my brow and study him when his third reason sinks in. _He didn't trust himself?_ I don't like that. I want him to feel as comfortable with me as I do with him.

I finally pull myself out of my mental dialogue and place one of my hands against his cheek, looking into his eyes. I start rambling about things that I think he might be worried about, "Embry, Angela won't walk in again, she knows she has to knock. We won't be caught off guard."

Embry shakes his head, leaning in to my hand. His hands drop from my face to my thighs, wrapping my free hand in one of his, "Lillah, that is not what I'm worried about."

"Well what then? Why don't you trust yourself? I trust you." I have to know why he doesn't trust himself with me. I can't really go into this blindly anymore.

"You really shouldn't, I'm very selfish and I don't have your best interest at heart. I don't trust myself to sleep, just sleep, next to you. I was exhausted Saturday night, I didn't even realize I had fallen asleep until I woke up Sunday morning."

I nod my head slowly and twirl my fingers in his hair, hoping to relax him. He lets go of my hand, but his hands don't move from my upper thighs, gripping them tightly. I can see that he's getting frustrated and it's the last thing I want but I really have to know. I need to know if he's just not into me so that I can protect myself.

I hear him exhale, like he doesn't want to say the next part, "But last night. Last night, Lillah, it was all I could do not to take you. You were so ready, you were flushed and relaxed from two amazing orgasms. It would have been so easy for me just to roll you over, have sex with you right there. You wouldn't have argued either. But I didn't want to take that from you."

I am taken aback that he actually wants to have sex with me. But I'm confused by the last part of his comment, "Take what?"

"Your virginity, Lillah." _Oh, yeah, that thing._ Last night I didn't even remember that I'm a virgin. I was so focused on how amazing he made me feel it didn't even cross my mind.I can't stop my blush, my cheeks on fire at this point. Him bringing that up is a bit different than if he'd told me that he just wasn't interested at all. I start hearing Carter in my head telling me countless times he wasn't interested in being with me because I couldn't satisfy a man.

"Embry, I-"

Embry speaks slowly, not looking at me, "That is something you need to save for the man you love, and who loves you. I know you don't love me, so I know I don't have a right to take that from you."

My heart squeezes at this statement. In other words, he's telling me not to get my hopes up. That he can't be that man for me. The man that I could fall in love with and would fall in love with me in return. I bite down on my bottom lip and blink several times to clear my eyes.

"But even watching you fall asleep last night, I was still so worked up, I didn't trust myself to fall asleep next to you." Embry looks so sad, but I don't know why.

"Because of what we had done, right?" I look down, keeping my eyes locked on his throat as I continue, though I'm barely able to whisper, "I understand if you aren't really attracted to me personally. A woman is a woman."

I need to make myself understand this. He's not interested in something other than a friendship and the only reason he was turned on last night is because of what happened. Any male would have an erection when he was doing something like that. Emily, Rachel and Kim's conversation at the diner starts to hum through my mind. It's like being another nameless, faceless girl that he's picked up at a bar. After finding out about my sexual non-history he's lost interest in me.

"Damn it woman, look at me!" I immediately look up at him. I don't know whether to be frightened by his tone or completely embarrassed by this whole situation.

"Lillah, what do I have to do to prove to you that I really am attracted to you? You are gorgeous, beautiful, hot." He begins to try to convince me otherwise, even without me voicing my fears. But I really can't allow myself to fall into that, to believe him.

I'm shaking my head at him, not making eye contact again, too overwhelmed by all of this. I want to tell him he's wrong, that I am not those things, but he won't let me say anything, continuing on, "Jacob is ready to kill me for all the thoughts I have about you when I'm patrolling. Sam is about to fire me for how distracted I've been this past week. And all of my jeans are stretched out!"

"Your jeans? What do they have to do with anything? You haven't put on any weight since we met, why are they stretched out?" I can't help the giggle that escapes at this thought. His change in subject doesn't make sense at all. What do his jeans have to do with _me_?

Embry growls low in frustration and picks one of my hands up from my lap. I don't know what his intentions are until he brings my hand down between my knees and his legs. _Oh shit_. He cups my hand around his erection and just stands there, waiting. Of course this is what he would want, for me to touch him, to repay his actions from last night. _Stupid, Lillah._ I internally roll my eyes at myself because still, I don't get it. A female is a female. Even if he doesn't want to have sex with me, he's still looking for satisfaction, isn't he?

"The front of my jeans, Lillah. I think about you constantly, and whenever I think of you, this is what happens to me. This is why I don't trust myself to just sleep with you. Because all I can think about is _sleeping_ with you."

I swallow thickly and look up at him then back down, frowning slightly. He releases my hand and places his on my face, removing my glasses and speaking to me evenly.

"_You_ do that Lillah. Just you."

I shift on the counter because even though I'm unsure about his intentions with me, feeling him like this makes me react. Wetness pools between my legs when I feel him twitch in my hand. I lean forward, bracing my free hand on the counter and when I do, I unknowingly press my palm against him. Embry groans and drops his head onto my shoulder while his hands grip the edge of the counter on each side of my legs.

"Don't move, please. I can't guarantee I won't take you right here on the counter."

I sit stock still, not wanting to move my hand, not even sure that I _should_ move my hand. And if I do, what would he do? I take a deep breath, trying to steady myself. Even if he's only aroused because I'm just another girl I can't help but want him. Last night comes rushing back to me in a flood and I want him just as badly as I did then.

I stare at the top of his head buried in my neck, wondering if it's _really_ about _me_. I lean down until my mouth is on the skin of his neck and I kiss him there gently, making him jump. My heart rate and my breathing have both picked up. My breaths are harsh, almost panting but I try to control myself. I don't want to make Embry uncomfortable or to push him into something that he doesn't want.

Embry lifts his head to look at me closely. His eyes don't reveal anything but I can tell he's trying to gage my reaction. I lean my face toward his, hiding myself by looking down. My lips hover close to Embry's. I want to speak but I can't decide what I should say. I know he's just told me that I'm the only one that does this to him but I find it so hard to believe.

"Lillah, I don't know what to say to make you believe that I want you, just you. There's no one else I could ever want as much as you."

Embry's voice is gruff with tension and- lust? He drops one of his hands to mine and takes my wrist in the circle of his thumb and forefinger. I realize that he's trying to pull my hand away and I jump, bumping him unintentionally. I cringe when Embry's hand tightens his grip and then he jerks mine away from his hard on. His free hand smacks down on the counter and he growls out, "Fuck."

"Sorry, sorry. So sorry, Embry."

"Stop fucking apologizing," he sighs.

"Now you know why I couldn't stay last night. I can't handle you touching me. There's no way I could have fallen asleep next to you, your ass pressed against me. I would have cum with very little effort, Lillah."

"I want you too, Embry," I say to him quietly, scared to admit the truth but needing him to know.

"You just don't understand, Lillah. I've been with other women in the past. I won't compare you to any of them. I don't want you feeling like I'm using you just for sex. That would be the furthest thing from the truth. But I don't feel right about taking something so precious from you."

"Okay," I take a breath before continuing, "Embry, I wouldn't assume that. But I- need you to know I'm scared. I want to touch you, to give you what you've given me. I just don't know that I can. I never- I mean, when I was with Carter-"

Embry growls and places a finger over my lips, "I could go the rest of my life without hearing that asshole's name, Lillah."

I smirk and shake my head, "I just wanted you to know that I'd like to try things with you. I never wanted to- with him."

"You have no idea how happy that makes me. Probably because I'm a possessive fucker and would like to rip him apart."

My eyes pop open wide at his words. He hasn't spoken to me like that in the time I've known him. Thinking that he could be possessive, and jealous of someone that I don't have feelings for any longer, is not what I expected. And it's true, Carter never incited these feelings in me. Not like Embry can, even with just one kiss.

"And Lillah, as much as I love hearing that you want me, I think it would be best if we maybe take things a little slower this evening? I'm too keyed up right now."

The sudden change in topic confuses me for a second and I glance down, needing a break from his intense stare. I allow my eyes to slide down his chest, stomach and- _oh my, Embry_. The front of his pants are still bulged out. I bite down on my lip so that the little gasp doesn't escape. Embry's left hand reaches out and he lifts my chin so that I will look into his eyes. His lips are quirked sideways in a knowing smirk.

"A movie?" I squeak out.

"A movie works. Let me help you down."

Embry places both of his hands on my hips and pulls me forward so that my butt is on the edge of the counter. He doesn't step back when he pulls me off of my perch and against him. I slide down his body, my heat pressing against his hard on. I moan quietly at the contact but Embry doesn't stop. He keeps allowing me to slide down until my feet hit the floor and then he pulls me harder against him, groaning into my neck. He places a few sporadic kisses on my skin, sweeping his tongue over what I already know are light bruises on my neck. He kisses me one more time and runs his nose up my neck, to my ear.

"Tasty, Lillah, you are going to be the death of me."

Before I can say anything he takes one of my hands in his and turns to pull me toward the living room. We look through my DVD collection and find a movie that we can both agree upon, "The Mummy". I leave Embry to put the disc in the player and get the TV set up while I make popcorn and grab drinks for both of us. While I'm in the kitchen alone I take the chance to calm myself down a little and go over our conversation in my head. I should be mad at him still, for hiding things and for exposing my neck on purpose. But I can't be, because he respectfully explained himself and wonder of all wonders, it made sense.

I grab the bowl of popcorn and drinks and put them on a tray. On the way out of the kitchen I swipe a few napkins and some peanut M&M's then flip off the light.

Embry is stretched out on the couch, his back against the arm at one end. He has one leg along the cushions, the other on the floor. He smiles at me when I place the tray of snacks on the coffee table and pull it closer to the couch, so we can reach it with ease. I turn to face the couch and Embry. I have one of two options, sit at the other end of the couch or invite myself to sit in his lap.

_Lap_, I decide before I can talk myself out of it.

I step around his leg and stop in front of him, blushing as I meet his confused eyes.

"May I?" I ask, gesturing to the spot between his legs.

"Is that a good idea, Lillah?"

"Probably not."

Embry reaches for my hand and tugs me down, "As long as we both know that."

I feel his chest rumble with his laughter as we get settled on the couch. I lean back against his chest and rest my arms on top of his thighs. Embry wraps an arm around my waist and hits play on the remote.

We watch the first half hour or so in relative silence. I do turn my face into his chest when the bugs are on the screen. Embry chuckles when I do this, but he doesn't say anything. We share the popcorn, Embry eating most of it, of course, but he shares a little. Our hands meet in the bowl every now and then, and every time our hands touch a small thrill runs through me. I feel on edge, but at the same time, comfortable.

As the movie plays on, I relax more and more against him. About halfway through the movie, Embry places one of his hands on my stomach and begins to slowly move his thumb across the fabric of my shirt. It makes me alert to him, his breathing, the sound of his heart beating under my ear. I begin to move the hand that is on his thigh that rests against the back of the couch cushions. I wrap my fingers around the back side of his leg, kneading the muscles beneath the denim of his pants. Embry uses his free hand to pull my hair to the side and begins running his fingers through it.

"I love for someone to play with my hair," I sigh happily.

"It's beautiful, so soft and silky. It fits you, the fire and the gold."

Embry's voice has dropped a little and the depth makes me shiver.

Embry playing with my hair relaxes me so much, I find it hard to keep my eyes open. The exhaustion of the day and lack of sleep last night are catching up with me. I'm no longer focused on the movie, just the slow and steady movement of his hands playing with my hair. My breathing slows to match his and my eyelids droop closed.

"Lills, are you watching the movie?"

"Mmm sort of. I can see through my eyelids," I giggle when Embry chuckles.

"Really? Does that happen when you get your teaching degree? Kind of like eyes in the back of your head?"

His hand moves up my stomach a little, around my ribs and then back down.

"Yep, that is exactly what happens. We learn _all_ kinds of tricks in school," I say playfully.

"Sounds like my mom growing up. She always knew when I was going to get in trouble."

I leave my eyes closed, but images of Embry as a baby float through my head. My stomach clenches at the thought of a tiny version of Embry, growing inside of me. I can just see him holding our baby.

To distract him I ask about his mom, "Tell me about her."

Embry's voice changes as he starts talking, he seems lighter. "My mom was awesome. Her name was Nayeli, she was Makah, like Emily. Her parents died soon after I was born, so it was always just her and I. We didn't have much growing up, but she always made sure I was taken care of."

"When she had to work she'd send me over to the Black's house to play. If I wasn't at home, I was at the Black's. I sometimes would pretend I was part of their family, another sibling. It's funny now, since I practically am a sibling, between Jacob being my Alpha and Rachel, well, being Rachel."

Embry pauses so I turn my head to look him in the eye, "You don't have to go any further. I understand."

"I know." Embry smiles softly at me, "I was just remembering how great my mom was. Even through all our fights, when I couldn't tell her about being a wolf, she still cared. Emily actually came over to explain to my mom one day that I wasn't out getting into trouble. It didn't really help, but I appreciated Emily trying."

Embry kisses the top of my head, lost in thought. I'm not sure if I should press on, but I want to know more about him, and I can tell his mom is still a big part of who he is, "She didn't- was she angry still with you when she died?"

"No. I think by then she knew I wasn't some rebellious teenager. I'm sure Billy told her what he could to alleviate her fears. I think it helped that by then there were so many of us, plus the imprintees. Since two of Billy's three kids were 'involved', I think my mom 'knew' we weren't just out causing trouble. Billy would never allow his kids to get into the kind of trouble my mom feared I was getting into."

Embry shrugs, "Once I moved out, it made things easier. My mom didn't see me coming and going at odd hours. I think the hardest part for her was me moving out."

I nod, fully understanding what Embry means, "I know, I think my parents would have happily kept me locked up at home. They knew I wanted to move back to Forks, but they hated me not being near them."

"I don't blame them. And look, you've only been in Forks a few months and you've got some shady guy parked on your couch."

"Trust me, after the 'asshole', as you called him, no one can be as shady as he was."

"Your parents didn't like him?" Embry's voice sounds surprised.

"Well, on paper, they loved him. He was perfect for their little girl. But when I told my mom that we had broken up, she told me she was surprised I'd stayed with him as long as I did. She never liked how he treated me in front of them."

I can hear a strange noise coming from Embry, almost like a growl, before he speaks, "What do you mean 'how he treated' you?"

"Nothing, just things he would say to me in front of my parents." I'm trying to ease the tension. "I don't want to talk about him, Embry. He's not worth wasting our time discussing."

I fall silent for a second before going on, "Do imprintees and wolves have some sort of connection? Kind of like you guys?"

Embry chuckles, but it's more rough than earlier, "Nice change of subject there."

I don't comment, but I notice that Embry's hand stops for a second after my question, "Um, no, they don't. It's a wolf thing really."

"Oh, well that would be pretty cool, if you could just sense your imprintee though, right?"

Embry tenses beneath me but relaxes quickly and begins moving his hand again. He slips it beneath the edge of my shirt and begins making circles on the skin around my navel.

"Yeah, I guess. From what the guys tell me though, uh, since the imprintee is 'perfect' for the wolf, they have a different kind of connection, like they are two halves to a whole. The wolf may not 'sense' the imprintee, but they know them so well, they know what's going on."

He sounds uneasy and I'm not sure that I should be asking him these questions. Before I can stop myself I take the plunge. Asking him the one thing I've been most curious about.

"It must be hard for you, with most everyone being paired off. Do you- do you want to imprint? Are you ready for that?"

Embry doesn't speak for a few seconds. He finally exhales before speaking, "I, uh, I've never been interested in imprinting. But it's not like marriage, you don't get to decide if you're ready. It just, happens. The perfect girl is standing right in front of you, and you just know. No questions asked, she is the one. In that second, she becomes your life. It's no longer gravity holding you to the ground, it's her."

"As for everyone being paired off, well, I guess I never really noticed. After my mom, I just, I needed some time to myself. The idea of someone depending on me again, being responsible for someone- anyway, I've got you now. You can be my 'plus one'."

I nibble on my bottom lip and don't say anything after he gives me his answer. _No questions asked, she is the one_ is probably the scariest statement ever. What if he finds that girl some day? Am I okay being his "plus one" until then? Until he finds someone better, someone that he's meant to be with? The woman that was made for him? I swallow several times and try to focus on the movie so that I don't make a fool of myself and start tearing up.

-0-

**A/N:** Poor Lillah. She's such an emotional girl today. And Embry doesn't help the situation since he's secret keeper boy. Don't forget to hit that little review button, let us know what you think! We reply to review and even pimp our favs over at http:/twificpimps[dot]blogspot[dot]com/search/label/hump%20wednesday!


	18. Chapter 18 Come This Far

**Chapter 18 "Come This Far**"

**Disclaimer:** WH & NKR here. We write dirty wolf fic. We aren't SM. Sadly, Mormon just isn't a good look on us SSH's (Southern Smut H00rs).

**A/N:** Warning, you may not want to read this chapter at work. We'll leave it at that and let you move forward at your own risk of drooling on the keyboard.

_It's undeniable how brilliant you are  
In an unreliable world you shine like a star  
It's unforgettable now that we've come this far  
It's unmistakable that you're undeniable  
_"Undeniable" - Mat Kearney

**EPOV**

"It must be hard for you, with most everyone being paired off. Do you- do you want to imprint? Are you ready for that?"

All I want to do is to turn her around, kiss her soundly and then tell her the truth. I _never _wanted to imprint. I was content before she came into my life. There was no way I could have ever been ready for her. But now that I have imprinted, I realize just how empty my life was before her. Whether I like it or not, whether I wanted to imprint or not, Lillah is my life now.

I cringe internally, hating myself for what I'm about to say, but knowing that it's my fault I'm in this position. If I had told her right away what happened, I wouldn't have to hide things from her now. Still, I'm as honest with her as I can be, telling her as much as I can without giving the secret away, "I, uh, I've never been interested in imprinting. But it's not like marriage, you don't get to decide if you're ready. It just, happens. The perfect girl is standing right in front of you, and you just know. No questions asked, she is the one. In that second, she becomes your life. It's no longer gravity holding you to the ground, it's her."

"As for everyone being paired off, well, I guess I never really noticed. After my mom, I just, I needed some time to myself. The idea of someone depending on me again, being responsible for someone -anyway, I've got you now. You can be my 'plus one'."

I may not be able to share thoughts with Lillah like I can with the wolves, but I can tell she isn't completely thrilled by the idea of being my 'plus one'. Of course, I should have figured, why would someone as wonderful as Lillah ever want to lower herself to be with someone like me? It's stupid of me to think she could ever be happy with me. We are only friends right now because of the pull she feels. As much as I hate the thought, I'm sure she'll leave me as soon as a better guy comes along. But, until that time, I'm going to do my best to be the perfect friend for her.

Lillah's hands moving against my thighs brings me out of my thoughts. While I haven't strayed far from her navel, Lillah is starting to explore more. Her fingers are pressing into and moving higher up my thighs. I know I should stop her, but her light, innocent touches are like nothing I've ever experienced before. The women from my past could never compare to how Lillah makes me feel.

Wanting to help her relax and encourage her exploration, I move my hands to her shoulders, gently kneading. I try not to put too much pressure on the bruised areas, just in case. "I am sorry about your neck and shoulder. Does it hurt?"

Lillah shakes her head, but I can feel heat building on her neck, "No, it doesn't hurt. It felt- I mean, I liked it when-"

I tilt my head down to whisper against her ear, "Are you trying to say it felt good and you liked it when I sucked and bit at your neck and shoulder?"

"Yeah, oh wow, yes." Goose-bumps appear all over Lillah's arms and her hands tighten on my thighs. I feel her body shake for just a second.

"Good," I begin to slowly, run my tongue down the shell of her ear until I reach her earlobe. Being as gentle as I can, I tug her earlobe into my mouth and bite down with my front teeth.

Lillah gasps, turning her head as soon as I release her earlobe. She quickly turns her body to face me, returning one hand to my raised knee, the other burying deep in my hair as her lips descend to mine.

As soon as our lips touch I'm lost. I wrap my arms around her, pulling until her chest is against mine. She opens her mouth to me, her tongue meeting mine, hesitant but hungry, needing to feel. Both of her hands have moved to my chest but she seems to be whimpering. I pull back reluctantly, not wanting to break the contact. I resist the urge to begin to attack her neck and shoulders again, instead outlining the shell of her other ear with my tongue.

"What? Tell me what you want, Lillah," I whisper against her ear before dropping tiny kisses from her earlobe to her chin.

"May I- I want to feel- your chest." It takes Lillah a moment, but she does manage to speak what's on her mind. Seeing her slowly become more comfortable voicing what she wants makes my heart bump in my chest.

I lean back just slightly before tugging my shirt up and over my head, tossing it on the floor next to the couch. "Feel away, sweet Lillah."

Lillah's eyes are wide, her bottom lip tucked in her mouth. I slide lower on the couch, pulling her hands until they are flat against my abs, "You can't hurt me physically. I'll even try to behave."

"I don't think you know how to behave." Lillah's eyes twinkle with laughter as her fingers tentatively start exploring, tracing the outline of my abs, "How much do you work out?"

"I don't."

"What? How do you have a body like," Lillah waves one of her hands above my chest, "THIS if you don't work out?"

I have to laugh at Lillah's indignation over my lack of a work out, "I patrol every day for three to four hours, which involves running all over the reservation and, now, up here to Forks. Plus cliff diving and just wrestling with the other wolves pretty regularly."

"Oh. Did you not patrol in Forks before?" Her fingers dancing across my abs are driving me crazy. I want to pull her to me but I'm trying to let her take her time getting accustomed to my body.

Without thinking I respond to her question, "No, Jake patrolled up here pretty regularly because of Ness, but we usually only patrol on the reservation."

Lillah's hands pause as she reaches my pecs, "So, why are you patrolling up in Forks now? I mean, if Jake is here."

"You really have to ask?" Lillah's eyes lock with mine; she has a puzzled look on her face.

I lift myself from the couch so that we are eye-to-eye, cupping her face to hold her still, "I patrol up here in Forks because _you_ are here. All alone. I wasn't joking before, being around us, it puts you in danger. Paul patrols late morning, early afternoon, so I know you are safe at school since that's the only time Rachel is away from Paul. But before and after school, there isn't anyone here to watch out for you. Beyond just getting to spend time with my beautiful and sexy friend, being here means I can protect you. Believe me, if I had my way, there would be someone guarding you at all times."

Lillah rolls her eyes, pushing gently against my chest, "Embry, you can't be here all the time. You need a life too."

"I don't know, I'm kind of liking my life right now. A beautiful woman willingly rubbing her hands all over my chest, it doesn't get much better than this. Now if I could only get her to share her M&M's with me, that would be perfect," I have to laugh when she narrows her eyes at me.

Lillah stands from the couch, grabbing the bag of M&M's. While she stands up, I take the opportunity to stretch out on the couch, taking up the whole length with my legs. When she turns around, Lillah laughs and puts one hand on her hip and taps her foot, "And just where am I supposed to sit now?"

I grab her hand from her hip and pull, "On my chest."

"Embry! I can't do that, I'll crush you!"

"No you won't! Lillah, you weigh next to nothing, but if you are really worried, you could always straddle me. You know, putting more of your weight on your knees instead of me." I do my best to keep my face clear of the excitement that is coursing through my body at the thought of Lillah's lush thighs wrapped around any part of me. _I am such a sick fuck._

"Straddle you? I…I don't…is that a good idea, Embry?"

I smirk at Lillah echoing my words from earlier, "Probably not."

She grins broadly, "As long as we both know that."

Lillah places the bag of M&M's on my chest then swings one leg over me, straddling my thighs. She hovers above me, like she is unsure where to sit. I wrap my hands around the back of her thighs and pull her up to my chest. When she passes over my hips it takes everything in me to keep from stopping, but I manage to ignore my dick and keep pulling her up, away from the 'danger zone'.

Once she's just over my abs, I move my hands to her knees, helping her to lower her body. I hold my breath until I feel her lovely ass against my stomach. I can also feel the heat coming from between her thighs; I try to ignore that sensation. I keep my thoughts on that to myself, knowing if she had any idea that I could feel her, she would be off of the couch like a shot.

Lillah smiles before returning her hands to my chest, running them up to the bag of M&M's. When she opens the bag she frowns a little then looks at my chest. I'm puzzled by this reaction, "What, Lills?"

"You really do run a higher body temperature, you melted the M&M's. A few are stuck together in the bag." She pours some into her hand to show me, "Look!"

I'm already sliding my hands under her shirt, itching to lift it, but I have to smile at the candy she's showing me, "They'll still taste good, even if they are a little melted. I like my treats soft and sweet."

One of Lillah's eyebrows lift in surprise, "Soft and sweet, huh?"

I close my eyes when Lillah drops an M&M in my mouth, "Perfect balance of soft and sweet," I whisper, then lick the melted chocolate off of my lips.

"Watching you eat candy should probably be against the law," Lillah is staring at my mouth when I open my eyes. I have to chuckle at the glazed over look on her face.

I easily take the bag of candy from her. Pouring a couple in my hand, I offer her one. She takes it in her mouth and closes her eyes. My fingers linger on her lips, "Don't you just love the hard peanut wrapped in the soft and sweet chocolate?"

Lillah moans softly, her eyes still closed. I place another candy against her lips and she quickly opens her mouth. But before I can pull my finger out, she wraps her lips around my finger, sucking on the candy and my finger. Her tongue does a slow, torturous lap around my finger before she opens her mouth again to release my finger. _Well, shit._

"God woman, that mouth of yours is going to kill me," I mutter.

Lillah blushes lightly but grins, placing another candy in my mouth. I do the same to her, trapping her finger in my mouth. I add a little suction along with my tongue lapping her finger. Lillah starts pushing her lower body against me, her hips making small circles in time to my tongue. When I finally release her finger, she doesn't immediately remove it, instead dragging it down over my chin.

Lillah leans forward and places a small kiss on my chin before continuing her finger's descent over my throat to my collar bone. "Hmm, no bite mark."

I smile, "No, I heal pretty quickly and with my darker skin, it wouldn't really show up anyway. I wish it did though. I would proudly show it off."

Lillah chuckles softly, "Men."

She sets the bag of candy down on the floor, letting both hands move across my chest. When she tentatively runs the pad of one finger over my nipple, I nearly jump off the couch, the sensation too much for me.

Instead I close my eyes and clench my fists at my sides. A low moan escapes my lips, "Fuuuu-uck!"

Lillah pauses for a moment, worry in her eyes. I speak quickly, to comfort her, "No, baby, it's good. I promise. I've just never- God, I love when you touch me."

"Oh, good. I like touching you," she admits shyly. Lillah's eyes light up as she places a small kiss on the center of my chest. My heart is racing at the feel of her soft lips, her hands on me. I need to touch her like she is touching me.

"Lillah, I want to feel you too. Will you take your shirt off for me?" She hesitates for just a second before nodding her head. She lifts her arms and grips the hem of her shirt. I can tell she's a little nervous, so I place my hands at her waist, rubbing small circles to soothe her. I can feel the tremor that runs through her body, but she doesn't stop, pulling her tank top off for me. Of course, she still has a bra on, but the sight of her creamy white skin above me drives me wild. She is beautiful. She is perfect. I don't think I'll ever get used to the sight of her, the swell of her breasts peeking over the top of her bra, her gorgeous smile.

Unable to stop myself, I brush the pad of my thumbs over a pert nipples, through her bra. She gasps, whispering my name as her breath hitches. She arches her back slightly, pressing her chest toward my hands as her hips press down against my torso. The most amazing sounds are coming from her mouth, though she isn't saying anything, other than whispering my name amongst her whimpers and soft moans.

I slide my hands back, slowly releasing the clasp on her bra and freeing her glorious breasts. They are just as beautiful as I remember. Full, round perfection with pink tips. I sit up so we are bare chest to bare chest. The movement causes Lillah to slide lower, she's now straddling my hips, nearly on top of where I want to feel her most. Trying to stay focused on her, I brush my lips against hers briefly, "You feel so damn good against me."

Lillah is still slowly moving her hips in small circles, the movement, now so close to my excruciatingly hard cock, is driving me crazy. I'm holding her against my chest now, my hands splayed across her back, trying to regain control of myself. But this time, Lillah has other plans.

She once again places a small kiss against my chin, then slowly kisses up my jaw until her mouth is pressed against my ear. I can feel the heat of her blush beginning across her torso and I know I'm in trouble. "I love how you feel against me. All of you."

With that statement, she slowly pushes herself down my body until she reaches my throbbing cock. Even through her yoga pants and my jeans I can feel the heat rolling off of her. I want to push her forward until she's flat on the couch, her legs wrapped around my hips as I bury myself in her.

"Lillah, this probably isn't a good idea. I'm too close," I'm speaking through clenched teeth, doing my best to hold on to the last little bit of control I have.

"I know, I can- feel. I think I am too," that is probably the last thing she should be telling me at this moment.

I hold on to her as I lay back down on the couch, her chest still flush with mine. Even though I know I shouldn't, I slowly move my hands from her back to her hips. I speak softly against her ear, "May I feel how close you are Lillah?"

She sits up just a little, so her nipples are just barely touching my chest. Lillah nods once as her hips continue their pattern against my bulging jeans. I want to pick her up, carry her into the bedroom, strip both of us down and take her. Instead, I move one hand from her hip to the front of her yoga pants. I dip my hand gently into her pants, moving over her silky panties until I can cup her; I watch as her eyes roll back and she cries out, pushing her hips roughly against my hand as she grips my hair to remain steady.

I slowly push her panties aside, sliding two fingers along her silky folds. Her hips buck against my fingers and she tugs roughly on my hair, "Oh God, Embry. How do you always make me feel this way?"

I don't answer her question, knowing the only answer is to tell her the truth. Instead, I pull my hand from her pants, my eyes never leaving hers as I slide those two fingers into my mouth, licking them clean, "Fuck you taste good, Lillah. Better than any candy." I don't finish the rest of my thought because I don't want to scare her. _I'd give anything to taste her, to make her cum on my tongue._

Lillah's eyes go wide then glaze over. She leans forward again, kissing against my chest. "Embry, please, help me."

"How would you feel about us helping one another? I can show you another way you can get off, if you'd like."

Lillah doesn't say anything, but she nods, licking her lips when she looks down at mine.

"Stand up then." Lillah looks at me, surprised, but she follows my directions. I stand, grabbing our clothes from the floor in case Angela comes home tonight, then easily pick Lillah up in my arms.

"Embry, what are you doing? I can walk!" Lillah is squirming in my arms.

"I know you can walk, but I like carrying you, you feel so amazing against me."

"Fine, it's your back that's going to give out."

I carry her into the bedroom, closing the door with my foot, then place her on the bed before returning to lock the door. As I turn back around I have to smile, Lillah, lounging on the bed is quite a sight. "You are light as a feather, no worries about my back. And you look too sexy for words on that bed. I'm going to take off your pants, if that's ok?"

She nods as I return to the bed. I quickly shed my jeans, glad I pulled boxers on earlier during my argument with Jacob. Wouldn't want to freak her out by being naked straight off. I lean over Lillah, kissing her forehead, both eyelids, the tip of her nose and finally brushing my lips against hers. "Lift your hips for me."

She does as I ask and I easily pull her pants off. I'm careful to make sure we both leave our underwear on. This is going to be difficult enough, but if we were both naked, I know I wouldn't be able to control myself. I would very likely confess everything to her and beg her to allow me to make love to her right away. _Not a bad idea._

I clear my mind as I slide onto the bed, my body hovering over her. I'm careful not to touch her anywhere other than her lips. Lillah's fingers thread through my hair before she tugs me down toward her, and against my better judgment, I let her. She already has her legs spread out, waiting for me. As soon as our lower bodies connect, we both cry out in pleasure. Lillah immediately wraps her legs around my hips and uses her leg muscles to pull me tighter against her. "Oh. Oh God, Embry. So good."

I'm trying to hold myself together but my hips have a mind of their own, they are already moving, needing to feel more of her. She feels so good, her hot pussy pressing against me. I'm worried I might not be able to control my body anymore.

Not wanting to rush this, I roll over, placing Lillah directly on my cock, with just the thin material of our underwear separating us. My hands grip her hips, which have already started moving against me. If I thought she felt amazing before, it's nothing compared to this.

"I think you'll like this even more, Lills. You are in control. You can touch me wherever you want baby," I explain the change in positions.

As she moves her hips against me, I watch her, marveling at how comfortable she feels with me. Amazed at how she takes charge. _Just with me._

"I'm so close, baby. I'm going to make sure you cum first, but I might cum too," I warn. "Don't be freaked out, ok? It's a good thing, and it's only because of you," I try to reassure her because I know that any second I will burst.

I loosen my grip on her hips, letting her find her own rhythm. As her hips start moving in tiny circles, she once again slides the pad of a finger across one of my nipples. This time I can't control myself, my hips push up against her. I can feel how drenched she is, as it seeps through our underwear, my cock is pushed harder against her folds. Lillah cries out at the contact, her body already so close to release. I imagine her completely naked, pressing her wet pussy against me, rubbing along the length of my cock until I can't take it anymore and push up into her.

I pull her shoulders down just a little until she's close enough for me to wrap my mouth around one of her nipples. Her bare tits have been quivering above me, teasing with every movement she makes. While I lavish one nipple, my fingers pinch and tease the other. Lillah's hips have found their rhythm now: push down, spin, two thrusts forward and repeat. The extra pleasure I'm offering with my mouth makes her moans and gasps increase in frequency.

When I pull back from her breasts to take a breath, she pushes me back to the bed. I glance up at her and grin when I notice the heavy lidded eyes, swollen lips and flushed skin. _She's so fucking sexy._ She continues her movements, but leans down, her mouth wrapping around my nipple, first her tongue flattening against it, then her teeth joining in. I gently pull her back, whispering, "God, Lillah." As much as I love what she's doing, I'm afraid she's going to make me lose my self control before I can take care of her.

She grins, but I can tell she's very close. She places her hands against my chest, using it for leverage, allowing her to press herself harder against me as she continues to slide over my aching cock. She looks so beautiful, riding me, that I can't help but picture what it would be like to have her naked with my cock buried in her. Lillah's vibrant hair caressing her bare skin, moving with her graceful body, her teeth biting into her bottom lip, her eyes dark and full of lust._ Focus! Can't take her now._

"Feels so good, Em-," the catch in her voice tells me just what I need to know. She gasps and her eyes roll back.

"Do you need help with that last little bit, Lills?" I can tell she just needs one more little push to fall over the edge.

She whimpers and nods and I happily slip my fingers into her panties. I slide one finger between her folds, dipping it quickly into her. Lillah moans deep in her chest. I feel her walls tighten around my solitary finger and I'm shocked again at how tight she is. I can't imagine what it would be like to be in her. _Heaven and hell._ Excruciating pleasure that would make me lose my mind.

Moving my finger forward, I find her clit, pressing against it as Lillah's hips go crazy. She has lost her rhythm as she nears her release. She's mumbling now, "Embry, more, inside, please!"

I'm assuming she wants my fingers in her again and I can't ever deny her anything. This time I slide two fingers into her and we moan, together. She practically purrs when I stroke the walls of her pussy. A few more strokes of my fingers, a twist of her hips against my cock and I'm watching as her orgasm takes over. I want to be the only bastard that ever gets to witness this side of Lillah. _Fuck! I'm so far gone with her I would probably rip any other man's dick off that even thought of coming near her. She's mine._

_Can't think about that right now._ Lillah riding out an orgasm is one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen. I force myself to pay attention to her, to notice every detail, commit it to memory. As I watch, her entire chest turns bright pink and there is a small sheen of sweat that covers her as she pants erratically. She presses her hands against my chest, using it for leverage to press back against my cock while her body shakes violently against me. Her hair has fallen forward, brushing my chest as she rides out the waves, her back arched and tense. As if watching her isn't enough, the sounds coming from her mouth are so fucking sexy I could close my eyes and easily cum just listening to her.

I slowly slide my fingers out of her as she finishes. She kisses my chest before she leans down, collapsing on top of me. As she's resting, I know I can't stop myself, I have to finish what we started. With my fingers still wet with her cum, I dip my hand down into my boxers. Lillah's breathing has evened out, but when my hand moves to my boxers, she gasps. Her hand moves to cover my wrist.

"Lillah, I'm sorry, I have to," I apologize with a gravelly voice. "It was too much watching you. I need to cum," if she doesn't think she can watch this I'll have to leave her for a while. My balls are ready to stage a mutiny if I don't get off soon.

Lillah shakes her head then looks up at me briefly before looking away. Her fingers dance over my hand as she whispers almost so low I can't hear her, "I want to touch you, Embry. Please let me touch you."

The thought of her hand on my cock is almost too much to bear. I'm sure I will die at this point if she does touch me. But I'm also sure that I will die if she doesn't touch me. Either way, I need relief, _now_. Of course, either way, I will die without having fucked Lillah, like I desperately want. I want to push those panties aside and lose myself in her.

When she looks up at me, her eyes are wide, pleading, but I shake my head, not wanting her to feel like she has to do this, like it's expected. _Like that asshole, Carter. _

"Too much, too close right now, Lills."

"Please Embry, I need to," her eyes haven't left mine, but her hand has moved to rest over mine. I want to, but I can't keep telling her no, not when she is finally telling me what she wants and needs, not when she begs. _I should probably keep that a secret too._

I close my eyes, unable to look at her, knowing I'm going to regret this, but I nod once. I don't even get the chance to open my eyes before Lillah's hand is moving off of mine and under the elastic of my boxers. Instead of gripping the shaft as I would have done, Lillah slowly slides one finger from the tip to the base. I'm grinding my teeth, trying not to cum at just her simple touch.

Once she reaches the base she lightly wraps her fingers around me, sliding upward. She doesn't have a lot of pressure, but just the feel of her fingers around me is testing my limits.

When her fingers reach the tip, her thumb slowly brushes over the head, spreading the pre-cum she finds there over the head of my cock. She once again slowly slides one finger from the tip to the base. This time when she wraps her fingers around me, she tightens her grip as she slides her hand upward.

I'm doing my best to stay still, but the feeling of her tiny hand finally touching me where I want her to most is killing me. As she's sliding her hand up, I thrust my hips up, which causes her hand to slide down my shaft, squeezing me tight. "Oh, fuck! Lillah!"

She once again slides her hand up, but she is tightening her grip now. Then she slides her hand down once, and my hips once again thrust up, needing to feel the tension of her hand around me.

"God, so good, Lillah!" I'm panting, but I want to teach her what feels good to me, I want her to know how she can easily satisfy me, "Tighter, baby. Let the skin come with you when you pull up, slide it and your thumb over the head when you stroke up."

Lillah's hand moves up again, this time pulling my foreskin up, sliding both it and her thumb over the tip.

"Fuck! Yes! Just like that baby. Shit you're a fast learner."

Lillah purrs against my neck, "You feel- I like- Mmm, I feel like I'm close again, Embry. How can that be?"

I've been so focused on my own near release I didn't realize Lillah was enjoying this just as much as I was. I slide my hand into her panties again. She's right, she is definitely close again. I easily slide two fingers into her tight heat; we both moan when I slip into her wet folds. Immediately she increases her strokes on my cock and she bites down on my chest, muffling her screams.

"Fuck you're wet, Lillah. All for me. You are turned on again just by stroking my cock." I pump my fingers in and out of her at the pace of her hand moving over me. We are both panting and on the edge.

"Pull that skin with you again, baby," I'm trying to concentrate, give her instructions but I'm so close I can barely get the words out now, "Thumb- run the underside- stroke down. I'm so close, fuck you're amazing." Lillah uses her thumb just as I told her, using short strokes now that I'm close. Knowing that watching her cum again will bring on my own release, I keep my two fingers moving in her as my thumb reaches for her clit. As soon as my thumb brushes over that sensitive spot, she is gone.

As her orgasm takes over, her hand starts convulsing around my cock. I reach my other hand into my boxers, placing it above her hand. I'm able to make sure I cum in my boxers but that is my last thought before I feel myself lose control. This is like no orgasm I've ever had before. All I feel is Lillah convulsing around my hand; her hand pulsing around me pulls one of the most powerful releases I've ever had out of me.

It takes me a few minutes to recover. Lillah has pulled her hand out of my boxers and has her head against my chest. Her breathing is still erratic, like mine, but she seems okay. Her lush body is soft against mine. I can tell she's relaxed and sated; it makes my heart swell, knowing I'm the reason for that.

I kiss the top of her head. When she looks up at me, she has the most beautiful smile on her face. She kisses my chest right above my heart before sliding up closer. She is grinning when she cups my cheek, lightly pressing her lips against mine. We lay quietly for a while before either one of us speaks.

"You have some catching up to do."

"What?"

"I'm up to four and you only have one." Lillah is blushing as she speaks, but still smiling.

I have to laugh, "You are counting orgasms now? Shit, I'm corrupting you."

"You are corrupting me. But I also blame Emily and Rachel in my corruption."

I'm surprised by this admission, "Is that so? How have they contributed?"

"I'm pretty sure I know way more about what Sam and Paul like than I ever would want to know," Lillah blushes fiercely.

"Is that so? This might work out even better than I planned. You can be my spy. You get the imprintees to tell you all their dirty little secrets, tell me, and I use them on the other guys."

Lillah playfully smacks my chest, "Embry, I will not do that! Emily and Rachel are my friends."

"Oh come on, just one little thing? Or, better yet, tell me about one of the dreams you've had about me. I told you about mine the other night. It's your turn." I smirk when she turns her face down, her embarrassment evident.

But just when I think she's not going to say anything I hear her whisper, "Last night's dream was pretty similar to what just happened tonight. I mean, we didn't go as far in the dream, but, I was straddling your hips. I could feel you against me. And…mmmm"

Lillah's hand is once again moving over my abs, her delicate fingers tracing the patterns of the dips in my skin. "Did you like feeling me against you?"

Lillah doesn't look at me but I can feel her smile against my chest and I can hear her whisper, "Yes, but I liked it more tonight."

"And when you touched me? That was ok?"

Lillah nods but doesn't say anything. I want to keep her talking, get her accustomed to telling me what she does and doesn't like. And hopefully build up the confidence that Carter stole from her.

"Seemed like it was more than ok, though. It seemed to turn you on again. You were so wet when I touched you. Tell me what you liked about it."

"Mmm, I liked you telling me what felt good." Lillah still won't make eye contact with me.

But, she is talking, so I press her for more detail, "Is that all? Me telling you what felt good turned you on?"

"Yes. And touching you. Knowing that I made you feel that way. Hearing you say that you liked it. It turned me on to know _I_ could be the one that made you feel that good, and I could be the one to help you."

"Lillah, will you please look at me?"

She blushes, but looks up. There is still a faint smile on her face. I pull her up my body until our lips meet. When I pull back reluctantly, I look into her eyes. They are still dilated, with just a small rim of grey around the edge.

"Now you know how it makes me feel when I help you. And when you tell me what _you_ like."

Lillah looks down at my chin, not making eye contact as she speaks, "I don't know what I like, but I've liked everything you've done so far."

I chuckle, "That's good. If ever anything doesn't feel good, I want you to tell me, ok?"

Lillah sighs contentedly, "I can't imagine anything you'd do not feeling good, but ok."

I want to respond to that, but I keep my mouth shut. But inside my head, I'm screaming. _I know of one thing that won't feel good._ There is no way taking her virginity will ever be comfortable for her. And that's just one more reason why I can't have her.

I hear her suppress a yawn. I glance over at the clock, surprised how late it is. "Do I need to set an alarm?"

Lillah reaches over me, flips a switch on the clock then curls back up around me. "Done. Do not leave me in the middle of the night, promise?"

"I promise. Good night, Lillah."

"Good night, Embry."

-0-

Just like Saturday night, as soon as my head hits the pillow, I'm out. I don't have any dreams, and, more importantly, no nightmares while I sleep. I hold on to Lillah throughout the night, adjusting my body to hers but never losing contact.

I feel like I've just closed my eyes when the alarm goes off. I slap my hand on the table trying to shut it off as quickly as possible. Finally, I find the clock, managing to turn it off without breaking it.

Lillah is still curled up around me; her head on my chest, one hand tangled in my hair, the other holding on tight to my side, and her legs twisted around mine. If I didn't know any better, I'd think she was trying to wrap herself around me to keep me from leaving. Little does she know, I'm going to be here as much as I can. I'm never going to make the mistake of leaving her again, if I can help it.

Softly brushing her hair out of her face, I whisper as I kiss the top of her head, "Lillah, it's time to get up if you want to take that run."

"Don't want to run. Warm. Soft," Lillah whining about getting up is probably one of the most adorable things I've ever witnessed.

I can't quite suppress my laughter as I speak, "Yes, you are warm and soft all curled up around me, sweet Lillah, but if we don't get up, you won't have time for your run. I'd hate to be the reason why you miss your third morning run in a row."

Lillah grumbles against my chest, "Why? You're the reason I missed the first two."

"Hey! How can I be blamed for yesterday morning? I wasn't even here!"

"Exactly. If you'd have been here, maybe I wouldn't have overslept yesterday," Lillah places a kiss on my chin, grinning, "Good morning."

I have to shake my head at her logic, "I really don't get how women's brains work. It's a good thing you're so cute in the morning."

"Yeah, yeah. Come on, or I'll have to blame you for me being late again today," Lillah slides off the bed, keeping her back to me as she heads to the bathroom. I hate that we have to get going. I would prefer to spend all morning in bed with Lillah, but both of us have to get to work.

She quickly changes then offers me the bathroom. I quickly clean up from last night, removing my boxers before pulling on my jeans and sneakers. When I walk back into the bedroom, Lillah is putting her ear buds in. I follow her as she leaves the bedroom, walking out the front door to start stretching on the front porch. I close the door behind me and watch her graceful movements. Looking over her shoulder, she grins at me, "Aren't you going to stretch?"

"I run miles every day, no need. Besides, I like the view."

"Get used to it, that's the only view you are getting this morning. Come on wolf-boy, I'll race you!"

Lillah takes off down the porch, heading for her favorite trail. I easily keep up with her, but stay just a few paces behind, allowing her to get ahead of me. Not because I want her to think she's beating me, but because I want to see her hips swing, her ass move gently and the muscles of her thighs contract. In my twisted mind I imagine I'm chasing her to the bedroom, playing a game of cat and mouse before I fuck her senseless. _God, I can't wait to do any number of things with her.  
_  
I shake my head, reminding myself I need to focus right now. The dream from yesterday evening flashes through my mind and I suddenly realize how far ahead of me she is. As we go deeper in the woods, I move up beside her, grinning at her stunned look. "What? I told you I run every day."

"Is there anything you can't do?" Lillah giggles and blushes as she continues running.

"I can't teach, that's all you and Rachel."

Lillah looks away but I can just hear her mumble, "You've been a pretty good teacher so far."

I grin broadly, but don't say anything. I know she knows I heard her, but neither of us says anything. Mostly because we both need to get to work and can't afford a distraction.

As we finish our run, Lillah heads for the front porch. I grab her arm and pull one of her ear buds out, "Come around back with me."

"Ok. What's going on?"

"Just stand over here, ok? When I tell you it's safe to look, turn around."

"Ok, but Embry, I have to go shower and get ready for school."

As I pull off my sneakers and jeans, images of Lillah in the shower bombard my mind. I try to control my body, but I can't control my mouth, "I know, and as much as I would love to join you in that shower, I need to get ready for work too. It's safe."

Lillah gasps when she turns around. Of course, I have my back to her, but still, I don't think she was totally expecting to see my naked ass first thing this morning.

"I promised you I'd phase in front of you when you were ready. If this is too soon, tell me and I'll go into the woods."

I hear her let out a little "O" before she rushes to say something, "No, it's fine. I want to see."

I nod once then close my eyes, clearing my mind of all thoughts except for those of the wolf. I can feel it taking over my body and before I know it, I'm shaking like crazy. Seconds later, I'm no longer human, but a giant grey wolf. I turn to look at Lillah, concerned that she is freaking out. In this form, my hearing is even better, and I can hear her accelerated heart rate from across her yard.

Before I can stop her, Lillah is approaching me. I want to yell at her to stop, that I'm dangerous in this form, but she keeps coming. When she stops in front of me, her face is a few inches below mine.

Lillah reaches her hand up, stroking the fur around my face. Her fingers lightly trail around my eyes and I hear her whisper, "Like a heart," before she places a small kiss against my muzzle. "You are so beautiful, Embry. That was the most amazing thing I've ever seen. Thank you. I'll be at Rachel's tonight, but I hope I get to see you later."

I bow my head, trying to convey to her that she will see me later. I run my nose along her cheek briefly, inhaling her scent before turning and running toward the forest.

I can sense Sam in my mind. He's laughing, having seen the images of me phasing in front of her.

I don't need Sam to tell me how deep I am into this. _I'm screwed._

-0-

**A/N:** We warned you! Just a reminder that we are always around to talk about "Losing Control" or any of the other stories we've written. You can find us on Twitter (StupidLeeches) or on our website (www[dot]stupidleeches[dot]com). Other links to find us can also be found on those sites. As always, thanks to our amazing beta dailyicandy (daily[underscore]i[underscore]candy on Twitter) who pushes these chapters through like a mad woman and our awesome pre-reader morethanhuman who keeps us motivated by begging for more chapters! Don't forget to hit that little review button, let us know what you think! We reply to reviews and even pimp our favs over at http:/twificpimps[dot]blogspot[dot]com/search/label/hump%20wednesday (when WH remembers to submit)!


	19. Chapter 19 Over Analyze

**Chapter 19 "Over Analyze"**

**Disclaimer:** Still not SM. Still love to make her babies do smutty things. We only own a lot of Twi merch, Eli and Carter.

**A/N:** Here we are again! Another LC Tuesday (our favorite day of the week). This one is pretty entertaining- lots of girl time. Enjoy!

_If you see something in my eye_  
_Let's not over analyze_  
_Don't go too deep with it baby_

_So let it be what it'll be_  
_Don't make a fuss and get crazy over you and me_  
_Here's what I'll do_  
_I'll play loose_  
_Run like we have a date with destiny_

_It's just a little crush (crush)_  
_Not like I faint every time we touch_  
_It's just some little thing (crush)_  
_Not like everything I do depends on you  
_"Crush" - Jennifer Paige

**LPOV**

_Embry is a wolf._ I knew this already, but seeing Embry phase is completely different from when I saw Paul phase. He just changed from a beautiful man to the most stunningly beautiful creature I've ever seen. The wolf, _Embry_, is very tall, and raw animal power. The corded muscles of his shoulders that I admire so much are transferred to this animal. Beneath the grey fur I can see how tense he is, his muscles tight like he's ready to bolt at a moment's notice.

I walk slowly toward him, unsure of my steps, not wanting to scare him off. His eyes are giving me a warning, like I should run away, but I keep moving. I'm surprised by my lack of fear; I know, deep down, this is _my Embry_. This is the man that could crush me if he wanted to, but has never been anything other than gentle and caring to me. Why should I think he would be any different when he's in his wolf form?

When I finally reach him, I want to wrap my arms around his neck, pull this wolf to me. Instead, seeing the worry in his eyes, I simply lift my hand up; slowly, gently, I stroke the fur around Embry's face, noticing that the fur around his eyes is lighter in color; it looks like a heart. His hair is no longer silky; it's wiry and coarse, yet the same length; just barely enough for me to run my fingers through. I lean forward, placing a small kiss against his muzzle; somehow, I know this scares him. I've seen Emily's face; Rachel explained to me what happened. But even with those warnings, I can't be scared of him, because I trust him, completely.

"You are so beautiful, Embry. That was the most amazing thing I've ever seen. Thank you. I'll be at Rachel's tonight, but I hope I get to see you later."

Embry does a sort of nod and leans his head down; I assume this means I will see him later, my heart soars. I remove my hand from his face, but Embry leans forward before I can move, running his nose across my cheek. Before I can even giggle at the feeling of his cold, wet nose moving across my cheek, he's gone, running through the forest.

I'm so lost in my thoughts of Embry that I can't focus during the day. I'm just going through the motions; I know it, but all I can think about is _him_. As I'm teaching my freshman world history class, I can't help but smile when we briefly discuss mummification in ancient Egypt. I can almost feel Embry's hands playing with my hair as we watched the movie last night.

During lunch Rachel and I are discussing meeting up sometime to go running on the beach together, but I lose track of the conversation when I see flashes of Embry running with me this morning. His perfect body easily kept up with me, but he never acted like he was being slowed down by me. Rachel snapping her fingers in front of my face pulls me back. I blush slightly but Rachel just rolls her eyes and mumbles, "Stupid wolf."

Before my next class starts, a student walks into the room tossing an M&M into his mouth before throwing the empty candy package away. I'm a few minutes late starting the class because I walk out into the hall, feigning a need to check for tardy students. In reality, I need to time to calm down, my cheeks on fire at the memory of Embry feeding me the melted candy. That particular memory is too intense for me to just walk in and start teaching.

_I don't know if all of these reminders are coincidences or if someone is trying to tell me something.__Either way, it keeps Embry on my mind all day._

Having survived the day, _barely_, Rachel and I are in the hallway briefly chatting about the plans for tonight and what I should bring. Before I can leave, Principal Green corners us, talking about a plan he has to have the girls continue to cheer during basketball season in the winter. As he speaks I remember Rachel telling me about Embry almost phasing in the stands on Friday night. While I'm not afraid to see Embry change now, the idea of him doing that in public, the possibility of him being seen by others scares me to death. Rachel gives me a funny look when I can't keep my body from shaking due to the cold chill moving down my spine.

Principal Green lets us go and we both run out to our cars, excited for this evening. I'm thankful for the distraction of hanging out with Rachel, Kim, and Emily tonight. I know they will be able to keep me from thinking about Embry the whole time. I spend the afternoon making snacks for the girls and me to nibble on while we discuss our dinner 'party'. I'm excited to be able to spend time with the girls again and I don't want Rachel to have to prepare everything, so I've made cookies, pinwheels and a fruit and veggie platter.

I wish Ness was going to join tonight, but when I asked Rachel about it earlier she shook her head, mumbling something about her dad not letting her out on school nights. From the small amount of time I spent with her at the bonfire she seemed really sweet. I think that she and I might be kindred spirits with neither of us really feeling like we _belong_ with the other imprintees. Her with not knowing Jacob imprinted on her and me knowing the secret but not actually being an imprintee. I feel kind of bad that I'd jumped to conclusions when I first saw her with Embry. _Not that he can't date someone if he wants to._ My stomach clenches at this thought and it is quickly followed by another, more real, feeling. _Hell no. He's mine._

I'm shocked at this possessive feeling, but deep down, it's the truth. The more time I spend with Embry the more I don't want to let him go. I know, no matter what Embry said last night, I can only be his "plus one" for so long. _Eventually he will drop me for his true soul mate._

I shake my head, clearing my mind, not wanting to think about the end right now. I know it will be devastating when it comes, but I want to enjoy the time I have with Embry and his makeshift family, including the imprintees. I'm sure it can't last forever, but I want to be a part of this amazing wolf pack for however long I can.

I pack up the food before running into my bedroom, grabbing a light jacket and slipping on my shoes. After snagging my keys, tote bag and cell phone I carefully place the basket of goodies in the Camaro and head over to Rachel and Paul's place.

-0-

Rachel jerks the front door open when I pull up in front of the house, "Get your sexy ass in here!"

She's clutching a glass of wine and grinning like a crazy woman. I chuckle as I carry my treats up to the porch, Rachel reaches out to help me with the goodies.

"How many glasses have you had?"

"This is just my second, Lil. I'm not drunk. Yet."

I snicker and follow her into the house. I'm immediately hit with how welcoming these three amazing women are to me; at no point making me feel like the outsider I feel I still am. There are hugs and "So glad you're here, Lillah" even before the front door has finished closing behind me. Emily takes the basket from my hands and places it on the kitchen table so she can unpack it. I grin as I hold up a bottle of wine and she laughs, pointing to the side table where three other bottles have been placed.

"I guess we're well stocked," I say and we both grin. While we uncover the food I brought I ask Emily about Eli and Claire and she nods her head down the hall. "Claire is playing with Eli in Embry's old room. She likes to 'play house' and pretend that he's her baby," she winks.

My heart stops at the mention of Embry, "Embry's old room?"

"Mmm yeah, this house belonged to Embry's mother," she explains while popping the cork on another bottle of wine.

"Oh." It's the only reply I can manage to give as I begin to take a look around, trying to see a young Embry in the kitchen, tugging at a faceless female's legs or pestering her while she cooks. Emily breaks me out of my revere by taking me in to see Eli and Claire. I follow her out of the kitchen and wave at the other girls on the way through the living room and down the hallway.

"Did Embry grow up in this house? Why would he sell?" The questions tumble out of my mouth without me even thinking about them.

"Yes, he grew up here. He moved out before his mom got really sick. After she passed, I guess he couldn't really deal with moving back here, you know? Anyway, he hasn't moved all of his things out yet."

I nod my head, understanding what she means. It must have been hard for him to lose the only blood relative that he had. The one person that he could count on, aside from the guys. We walk into a tiny room where the kids are sitting on the floor. There's a very small bed against one wall and I can't contain my laughter. I doubt that Embry has fit in that bed for some time. He takes over my much larger bed completely. His feet must have hung off the end of this one for sure.

Looking around the room, my eyes fall on a picture on the bedside table. I'm guessing it's Embry and his mother. Embry looks about fifteen or so, taller than his mom at the time, but gangly, nowhere near as filled out as he is now. The woman is beautiful; she reminds me a lot of Emily; long black hair with grey streaks throughout and that same rich copper skin. She is smiling broadly, her arms wrapped around her son's waist. Embry is looking down at her, a smile like I've never seen on his. The smile of an innocent boy that doesn't have a care in the world. A boy who doesn't yet have the weight of his entire tribe on his shoulders.

Emily and I glance over our shoulders when we hear Rachel talking loudly. She sounds annoyed but I can't make out what she's saying. Claire's head pops up and she grins wickedly when she sees me.

"Miss Lillah!" she exclaims.

"Hey there, Claire," I drop down to sit on the floor with her and Eli.

Emily sits down next to me and picks up Eli, who is eying me and grinning. I reach out to take him in my arms, when he lunges at me it makes me heart flutter happily and I grin at him. As he gurgles and tries to talk excitedly.

"How's it going big guy?" I coo at him and he takes my face between his tiny baby hands. He giggles and squeals at me, causing Emily and I to laugh. I tuck his tiny body against my chest and bury my face in his neck, kissing the tender skin and inhaling his sweet scent.

Every time I see Eli the ache grows a little bit more. I do my best to block out the images that flash through my mind, but they refuse to stop. _Embry placing his hands on my swollen belly. Going into labor. Seeing my beautiful baby for the first time with a head full of black hair, delicate tan skin and deep dark eyes. Watching him grow from a sweet infant to a playful toddler. Embry and I playing with him on the floor like I'm doing now, with Eli. _I shake my head slightly, to clear the images. Sometimes they even manifest in dreams. I don't know what has brought them on lately but I make every effort to push them aside. Embry isn't that guy, _not for me anyway_. He is destined to be with someone else; someone that deserves him and is made for him.

My head lifts quickly when I hear a throat clearing behind us. I turn to look over my shoulder and I'm shocked to see Embry. I have no idea how long he's been standing there but he has an odd look on his face.

Emily speaks before I can pull myself together to say anything, "Embry? What are you doing here? I thought you were with the rest of the guys?"

"Hey Em, uh I was- I am. I just had to come by and pick something up for Jacob. Yeah, so... yeah," he says awkwardly and rubs a hand across the back of his neck.

He looks at me, meeting my confused stare but glances away quickly. I turn back to Eli, placing him in my lap, giving myself an excuse to look at something other than Embry.

_Even though it's only been a few hours since I last saw him, I feel awkward here. I can feel his tension but I don't know the reason. He knew I was coming over to Rachel's, so that can't be what is bothering him._

I hear, rather than see, Embry move from the doorway into the room. Claire jumps up, leaping into his arms. He holds her upside down, making her giggle loudly. When I look up at him again I can see the tension has left his face. He's grinning happily when he glances at me as he places Claire back on her feet. His eyes are dancing with laughter and he winks at me playfully before grabbing a bag from the closet. He places the bag on the bed and pulls a shoe box from the top of the closet. He digs in the box for something that he palms then slips into his pocket before turning back around.

Emily stands while I kiss Eli's cheek and hug Claire before reluctantly standing myself. The three of us leave Claire and Eli, Emily giving a warning to Claire to make sure she doesn't let Eli into any of Embry's things before we walk out. Embry drops back behind Emily and I, placing his hand on my lower back, guiding me down the hall. The heat from his hand seeps through my shirt and comforts me like nothing else has ever been able to. I relax instantly and drop my crossed arms to my sides, allowing my fingers to reach next to me and grab the seam of his jeans at the side of his leg.

"Get out of here, Embry. This is ladies night, not ladies night plus one stubborn-ass wolf that won't share," Rachel is glaring at Embry, clearly not happy about him dropping by to join us.

Emily laughs and goes over to sit on one end of the love seat, joining Kim in nodding in agreement with Rachel.

"Whatever," Embry pretends to huff in annoyance but his smirk gives him away.

"I'm out of here anyway. Jake just needed to borrow something," he says, holding his bag in the air.

Kim shakes her head, but is laughing when she speaks, "Well hurry up and get out of here then. And make sure the other guys don't get into too much trouble!"

"Like I can stop them," Embry winks then tugs me with him toward the front door, ignoring Rachel's protests. He takes my hand in his and stops beside the door. Embry drops his bag to the floor, wrapping his arm around my waist and pulling me against him. A tingle skitters up my spine at his touch. I open my mouth to ask what he's doing but my gasp cuts me off. He presses his chest against mine, burying his face in my neck, kissing my skin gently, reverently. I shiver when he lifts his head to look at me. His eyes look darker, intense. Embry lowers his head slowly, his lips inching closer to mine.

Somewhere in my mind I know that we have a small audience. I just can't seem to make myself care at the moment. He finally drops his head a little more so that our lips meet. Our kiss starts out slowly, his lips gently moving over mine. He releases my hand and brings his up to place it on the side of my neck. His hand on my back pulls me closer to him. Embry presses his hips forward and I feel him becoming hard against my abdomen. I instinctively arch my back needing to feel closer to him.

My lips fall open slightly, as I moan, he takes the opportunity to run his tongue across my bottom lip before biting it gently. My stomach does somersaults and I shutter against him. Embry pulls away slowly and moves his mouth next to my ear, his low whisper sounding more like a growl.

"I'll be at the shop. Come by when you finish up here."

I think he's finished with me so I drop my hands from their spot on his chest and start to back away. But he doesn't allow that. His hands run down my back, keeping me pulled tight to him until he reaches my ass where he squeezes then grinds into me. _Oh shit._ He is completely evil, knowing what he's doing and that I can't, or won't, react in front of the girls.

Embry releases me and I sort of stumble back, my eyes glazed over as I stare at him. He's smirking cockily and looks at the girls, winking at them playfully. He turns back to me and lifts one of his hands to run it along my cheek. I almost think he's going to kiss me again but instead he turns, grabbing his bag before he walks out the door.

I take a few deep breaths and turn around. Kim and Emily are looking at me, grinning and giggling, but Rachel is staring at the front door, looking serious, seeming to be lost in thought.

"Just friends, huh?" Kim giggles, as I roll my eyes.

"Woohoo, Lillah! I wasn't sure if I was watching Embry kiss you or the start of a porno," Emily grins mischievously, cat calling loudly.

I duck my head a little and allow my hair to fall around my face before walking over to sit next to Emily on the love seat. Emily hands me a glass of wine while Rachel clears her throat and Kim starts snickering.

"What was that, Lillah?" Rachel is looking at me, her eyes narrowed.

I can't make eye contact with her so I take a sip of wine before speaking, "It wasn't anything, Rachel. Just a kiss."

"Just a kiss, huh? A kiss between two 'friends'?" Rachel is still looking at me, but I refuse to look up.

"Uh…yeah."

My voice is shaky when I speak. As much as I want to blame it on Rachel's scrutiny, I know that isn't what is causing the problem. It's because my heart is pounding out of my chest still, from Embry's touch. Hell, my palms are even sweaty; I never have sweaty palms.

"That's some friendship you have there, Lillah."

I roll my eyes at Rachel's comment. My face is blushing with such intensity that I don't think it will go away in this lifetime.

"Embry and Lillah are a different type of 'friends', right Lil?" Emily's looking at me with her head cocked to the side. She's grinning and I can tell that she's trying to hold back her laughter.

"So things with Embry are good?" Kim is smiling at me hesitantly, trying to ease the tension in the room.

"I guess, yeah. I mean, we aren't _together_ but I'm enjoying my time with him," I reach out for the vegetables that are placed on the coffee table, grabbing a carrot stick to nibble on.

"I know that wasn't your first kiss, but I'm guessing that also wasn't your second one," Emily now has one eyebrow raised in question.

"Nooo. Not close," I half whisper and then clear my throat.

I'm so embarrassed because I know where this is leading and I don't know if I can have this conversation with them. At the same time, I know these are the only women I can talk to, _really _talk to, about Embry.

Rachel shrieks, "DETAILS!" Obviously, she has moved past whatever had her so upset just a few moments ago.

"Yeah, what she said," Emily grins at Rachel's outburst.

"You sure are demanding, Rach," I wrinkle my nose when I look at her, knowing this is going to get even more uncomfortable, fast.

"Yes, yes I am," Rachel grabs a pinwheel and pops it into her mouth, grinning at me as she wiggles her eyebrows, "That tastes amazing, Lillah! Now spill!"

"If she doesn't want to share don't force her, Rachel. She's just a little bit uncomfortable talking about this and that's okay," Emily jumps in to defend me. "There's nothing wrong with being a 'fraidy cat."

"Emily!" I'm shocked she would say this, but I can't contain my laughter at her words. She sounds so much like Claire in that instant, "I'm not a ''fraidy cat'."

"So give us the details then," Emily smiles sweetly.

_Sneaky little woman._ I shouldn't be surprised though. Emily is sweet but I suspect she has a bit of a devilish side too. I guess you'd have to with all the guys and testosterone floating around. We hear Claire call for Emily and she jumps up, telling me not to say anything until she's back.

"Aren't we supposed to be discussing the 'family' dinner?" I ask Kim as I reach for another carrot.

"Lillah, nothing ever goes as planned with this group. More than likely we'll discuss that for all of ten minutes and then it'll be back to business."

"Which means back to talking about the guys," Rachel supplies.

"Of course," I say, laughing and shaking my head.

I really don't think I'm going to get out of talking about Embry, or sharing the details with them. It's not that I don't look forward to their opinions but I'm worried that they'll assume things or look too deeply into what I do say. If I can't continue to make them believe that he and I are only friends then I'll never live it down. The last thing I want is for anything about me having even the smallest feelings for Embry to get back to him through the other guys by way of the imprintees.

Rachel is bouncing in her seat, unable to contain herself, "Is he a good kisser?"

"RACHEL!" Kim laughs and taps her arm lightly.

"It's ok, Kim" I laugh. I know there is no point in trying to avoid this now.

"Embry is a-"

I stop suddenly when Rachel lifts her hand, "Not until Emily gets back."

Emily comes running into the living room, "Kids are tucked in, and I'm here! Continue! 'Embry is a-' what?"

I close my eyes and purse my lips, "Fantastic kisser."

"I figured," Rachel grins before standing. She comes back from the kitchen with quesadillas, chicken strips and potato skins for us to munch on as we talk. I grab a few little things along with more vegetables and lean back. Emily refills her own wine glass along with Rachel's and mine. I glance quickly over at Kim and realize she's sipping on a glass of water. Having learned a few tricks from these ladies already, I jump on this, wanting to change the conversation, quickly. Any topic will do as long as it isn't about Embry and I.

"So, Kim, any _particular_ reason why you aren't drinking tonight? Weren't you just drinking on Thursday when we got together?" I lift my eyebrows, grinning at Kim.

Kim looks down at her glass of water, smiling, "We aren't 100% certain, just yet," Kim's grin gets even bigger when she glances up at all of us, "but it looks like I might be pregnant."

"Kim! That's wonderful" Rachel pulls Kim to her for a hug.

I set my food down before going over to hug Kim, whispering, "Congratulations."

Kim whispers back, "Thanks, Lillah."

"Oh my gosh! That is so exciting Kim!" Emily pulls Kim into a tight hug, and then frowns at her as she sits back down, "Did you guys just start trying?"

Kim's cheeks turn slightly pink as she shrugs, "We decided to start trying a few weeks ago, but Jared's been bugging me since you had Eli. I didn't even think about the possibility of me being pregnant last week, since we just started trying, but the other day-"

"He told you, didn't he?" Emily is bouncing on the love seat as she questions Kim.

"Oh my God! YES!" Kim is giggling with Emily now. I'm completely lost, but I can't help grinning with my friends, their excitement rubbing off on me. "Jared came home from patrols on Sunday and just looked at me, then started smiling and picked me up to spin me around. He was going on and on about how excited he was. I had no clue what he was talking about!"

"Sam did the same thing when I was pregnant with Eli. I argued with him about it but he couldn't be convinced otherwise. We even made a bet before I took a test," Emily says, laughing and shaking her head at the memory.

"And he was right?" I ask curiously.

"Yep. He was right. It was weird. I don't know how he knew. Maybe I smelled different with my hormones and body chemistry changing?" Emily speculates with a shrug.

"Wow, he must really know your smell if he could notice a change like that," I set my empty plate down, grabbing the wine to refill my glass before settling back again.

Rachel grins at me, "Or for someone to know your scent well enough to realize you left your jacket on a coat rack at a crowded diner."

I can't help laughing, "I don't know Rachel, maybe Embry just paid attention, or maybe I smell that bad to him! Still, I guess that's pretty neat." I look over at Kim, "Except if you wanted to surprise him, you really couldn't."

"Are you going to take a test, Kim?" Rachel nudges her with her toes.

"Yeah, I actually had some blood drawn today at work. So we'll see, test results will be ready probably tomorrow, I hope."

Thinking about what Kim said and Emily shared makes me wonder how quickly the guys pick up on the changes, "How long did it take for Sam to notice, Emily?"

"I'm not sure of the exact number of days but it was before I'd even missed my period. So it was pretty quick."

Before I can stop myself I blurt out my next question, "What the heck? Emily you only missed a couple of pills and Kim you've been trying for less than a month? Do they have like, super egg-finding sperm or something?"

The girls start laughing at my question and Kim nods her head up and down, "Sorta, yeah, I mean, I've increased the doses of all of our birth control, just in case. A big part of imprinting is continuing the line. My thought is that the guys have higher sperm counts than the average man. Combine that with their sex drive, and you have some potent men."

"Hmmm," I say in response. While I know Embry has said he always uses protection, _and that he won't have sex with me_, this is still of particularly interest to me. I'm not on birth control at all. I never felt like I needed it with Carter, since he didn't want to touch me often or have sex. Since we broke up, there was never any reason for me to consider starting. But suddenly, I feel like I should probably consider being prepared, just in case Embry changes his mind. _I really hope he changes his mind._

Rachel suddenly glares over at Kim, "You know you being pregnant means I'm probably going to have to move the wedding up. I so wanted a beautiful spring wedding on the beach. At this rate it might be Daddy marrying us on the beach while everyone shivers away."

"Huh?" I'm completely confused now, not understanding why Kim being pregnant means Rachel has to move the wedding up.

"I didn't do anything! Emily started this," Kim looks over at Emily with a smile. "As soon as Eli joined the world, it was like they all had baby fever. Jared wouldn't drop it; he wanted to know how soon I'd stop the pill and when we'd know."

"It's not my fault they want to knock you two up!"

"Paul has mentioned it a few times since Eli was born, but ever since Jacob freaked out over the idea of me being pregnant when we get married, he's been hounding me daily. He asked me the other day if we could just move up the date of the wedding. He even mentioned a Justice of the Peace," Rachel shudders at this thought.

"Wait," I'm so confused by all this talk. I look down at my empty wine glass, realizing I've had three glasses so far, way more than my usual. But even with my increased alcohol consumption, the key players in these stories seem reversed to me, "The guys are the ones pushing to have babies? _They_ have baby fever?"

This idea is so foreign to me I can't contain my giggle at my own question. For a man to be the one wanting to start a family seems backwards. I know my dad loves me, but I'm pretty sure it was my mom pushing him. And I know Carter wanted nothing to do with talk of children. _I wonder if Embry wants kids?_

Rachel's giggling pulls me back, "Well, I want kids too. It's just, now that the next generation has been started; they all want to grow the pack."

"I also think," Kim smiles at Emily again, "The guys seeing you pregnant and with Eli through Sam's eyes have made them want that same thing for us."

Emily's grin is wide, "That could definitely play a part. Sam was so cute when I was pregnant. Once we knew for sure, he would talk to my stomach every night. When I started showing, he went nuts. Then when I could feel Eli moving around, he was always putting his hands on my belly, wanting to feel our baby moving around. He swore he could hear the baby's heartbeat, but I still say he was hearing mine. Now, Eli is like one of the boys. They all adore him. Especially Embry."

Emily is looking at me pointedly. I shrug, not wanting to say anything that will get me in even more trouble. I quickly change the subject back to Rachel, "So are you going to move up the wedding?"

"I haven't decided yet. I mean, it's not like we need anything fancy, just friends and family, but still, I wanted it to be special," Rachel sighs, lost in thought.

"You're marrying your Wolf Charming, how could it not be special?" I can't help the snicker that escapes when I use the new nickname I've given Embry. Of course, I don't tell the ladies that's what I'm calling him.

Unfortunately, they know me a little too well already. Kim's eyes go wide as she looks over at me, "Wolf Charming? That is quite a step up from Cranky Pants!"

"I'm going to turn into Cranky Pants if Lillah doesn't give up some details soon," Rachel attempts to frown, but can't hold her face. She starts laughing loudly, the wine making her even more silly than normal.

"Wolf Charming? Embry?" Emily shakes her head, "Yesh, Lillah, you do have it bad for him if you are calling Embry - the most stubborn wolf in the pack, behind my husband of course - Wolf Charming. I bet he'd just love to know that you call him that."

"NO! Emily you wouldn't!"

"I won't, I promise, as long as you tell us what else Embry is good at," Emily winks at me, taking a sip of her wine.

I open my mouth to speak but the only thing that escapes my lips is a squeak. The girls all laugh. I know they aren't laughing at me since they all have an understanding of how Embry makes me feel.

"So?"

This time it's Kim probing me to continue.

"He- he makes me lose my mind," I laugh sort of breathlessly.

"Oh honey, they all do that; it's just in their blood," Emily grins while snacking on a cookie.

"He's spent the night a couple of times," I shrug when the girls all look at me then at one another.

Rachel pouts, "All the guys knew on Sunday that Embry had stayed the night with you, but they didn't tell us. I had to find out from your cousin! The guys are keeping secrets from us!"

My face turns pink at this, "They all knew?"

"Yes, they knew, but don't worry, they know Embry's the big bad wolf that is going to eat you up!" Emily is wiggling her eyebrows, her double meaning clear.

My cheeks feel like they are on fire, from both the conversation and the wine. I twist my hair up off my shoulders, needing to cool down a little before I can say the next part, "We've fooled around."

"Fooled around? What does that entail?" Rachel asks, obviously wanting _every_ single detail.

"Have you had sex?"

When Emily asks this my face brightens even more.

"Wh- have _I_ had sex?"

"Yeah, with Embry?"

"Oh," I sigh and relax minutely. I thought she meant something else entirely.

"No. No, we haven't had sex. But he has seen me naked." I'm still surprised at his reaction to my body. Telling me I'm beautiful is one thing, but to actually look at me in a way that makes me feel beautiful, that is completely different. I whisper the next part, giving away part of my secret, "No man, has ever seen me naked."

"Does he have a big cock?" Rachel snickers, cutting right to the chase and ignoring my awkward admission.

"RACH! I- I don't know. _I_ haven't seen _him_ naked."

Rachel frowns. I can't imagine what her obsession is with knowing his penis size. I don't want to share details of what happened last night, but there is a question regarding _that_ topic that I have and I'm pretty sure only these women can answer. Thankfully I've had enough wine that I can almost spit the question out without wanting the floor to open up and swallow me whole.

"Last night he did finally let me touch him." The women all squeal at this comment and I can't help but join them in giggling. Once we all calm down I rush the question out, "Embry was giving me directions, on what he liked, and he mentioned pulling the skin up. When I did that, there was like, extra skin that came up over the top- it like, covered- _it_. What was that?"

"Oh my God!" Rachel is gasping, "Are you the same girl that less than a week ago said Embry wasn't going to get his hands on you? And now here you are, telling us Embry has stayed the night with you and you've given him a hand job. Now you're asking about his foreskin? Oh how the mighty have fallen to Embry's wicked ways!"

Rachel starts laughing uproariously, saying something about "uncut" when she catches a breath before launching into another fit of laughter.

Emily shakes her head at the obviously drunk Rachel before responding, "I think we'll let Kim explain that one to you, since she's the closest thing we have to a doctor here."

I'm suddenly very thankful for the alcohol. There would be no way I could talk about this stuff if I were sober. _Awkward!_

"Lillah," Kim starts, smiling at Emily then glaring at Rachel until she calms down, "Embry is uncircumcised. The 'extra skin' was his foreskin. When he isn't erect, it typically covers the penis. When erect, it usually slides back, exposing the head of the penis."

"Um," I don't even know what to say to this. Obviously I've heard of men being uncircumcised, but knowing and seeing- or in my case, feeling- are two different things. I wrinkle my nose, lost in thought.

Emily smiles, patting my hand, "Don't worry, it sounds like Embry is happy to teach you what he likes, what feels good to him. Just do as he says for now. As you become more comfortable with him, I'm sure he'll let you explore more."

I shake my head at the turn in direction this conversation has taken. I'm still unsure what I should say to these ladies, afraid I've already crossed some line by mentioning what Embry and I did last night. _What if Embry gets upset with me for sharing our private moments with my new friends?_ I'm nervous sharing these intimate details, no matter how much I love the imprintees.

I give them a few random bits of information. Enough to satisfy them but not too much. They hang on my every word and I find myself letting them give me advice too.

"It's weird, knowing that Embry was- with so many women, but now he barely lets me touch him. He even told me he won't have sex with me."

"What do you mean "won't," Lillah?" Kim, always one to pick up on the fine details, asks. "Have you told him that you want to?"

"Not exactly, but he's already told me he won't do it. During the times we've been together he hasn't allowed things to get far. I mean, other than last night. And to be honest, I'm shocked that he let that happen. Even then he only let me touch him."

Rachel lifts an eyebrow, surprised, "It's kind of funny that you find that odd. The rest of us find it odd that you two _haven't_ had sex."

"Lillah, have you thought about pushing back on him? Did I mention Embry is the most stubborn wolf, other than my husband?" Emily smiles at me sympathetically, before continuing, "These guys make decisions thinking they know what's best for us. Embry cares about you, I'm sure that is probably why he's holding back. He really is a good guy, I'm sure you already know that. But sometimes, we women have to use our _talents_ to convince these very stubborn men that they have made the wrong decision," Emily is winking at me.

"He is a good guy; I knew that as soon as I met him. And yeah, I guess I can see where he could be stubborn." All three women start giggling at this comment, which causes me to laugh, "Alright, he's really stubborn. But are you talking about _seducing_ him?"

Kim, even sober, is joining in the giggling, "Heck yeah were are suggesting you seduce him. Sometimes these guys need a little push."

"I guess I just-," I take a large gulp of wine before finally admitting another small part of the truth, "I don't have a clue what I'm doing. Even with him telling me what he likes and doesn't like, it's kind of awkward to try to act it out. I have practically zero experience." I dart my eyes back and forth from one girl to the next, trying to read their facial expressions.

Before any of them can say anything I admit to them what my real fear is. I speak low, looking down at my wine glass, "I'm scared he's going to imprint on someone else. What happens if I seduce him and I end up falling for him? Or, worse, I fall for him and he really isn't interested in me at all. I- I don't know what I'll do. I don't know what I'm doing _now_. My God, I've barely known him a week and he's become this huge part of my life."

Rachel looks concerned as she speaks, "Lillah, you told me yesterday you were sure you wouldn't fall for him. What changed in less that twenty-four hours that now you are worrying about falling for him and him imprinting on someone else?"

"He's changed, in the last couple of days. He's so sweet and caring; I could really get attached to this version of Embry." I sigh, last night's conversation hitting me in the chest again, "But last night, Embry mentioned something about imprinting, that when the guys see their imprintee, it's like an immediate thing. ' No questions asked, she is the one' is what he said. That means it could happen at any time." I try to shrug nonchalantly, not wanting them to realize how much Embry's statement last night bothered me, but it comes off more like I'm dropping my shoulders in defeat.

Kim smiles warmly, reaching over to hug me briefly, "Lillah, that is typically how it happens, but it's not absolute. Jared knew me for a while before he imprinted. Of course, we knew each other before he became a wolf, but that doesn't mean it has to happen immediately."

"Plus, there's nothing in the rule book that says a wolf has to imprint. Embry may never imprint," Emily's smile is soothing, calming my nerves a little.

Rachel jumps in, "There's also nothing in the rule book that says if a wolf imprints he has to tell that woman right away. Look at Jacob and Ness."

Even in my haze, I notice that Kim and Emily quickly turn to Rachel before looking back at me. I shake my head, almost laughing, "That's impossible." I don't add that I know I'm not the type of woman these guys would ever imprint on, no matter how much I wish I could be. How much I desperately wish I could be Embry's imprintee, his forever.

"Nothing is impossible with this group, haven't you learned that yet?" Rachel winks at me.

Emily shakes her head at Rachel before smiling at me, patting my hand to pull my attention back, "None of this changes the fact that he cares. Knowing our secret or not, you are the first woman outside of our group that Embry has spent any amount of time with. He cares about you. I don't think that would change if you hadn't seen Paul phase that day. He'd have met you eventually either way. Sweetie," Emily leans close to me, "give him some time. He really does want what's best for you. He feels drawn to you and that's new for him, but it doesn't lessen the strength of his feelings."

"Lillah," Kim says, pulling my attention away from Emily. "I agree with Emily. Just give him time. Don't dwell on the imprinting thing," Kim waves her hand as if it's nothing. It seems so easy for them to say I should ignore that aspect of him but I can dismiss it as easily. The thought that he could imprint at any moment will always be in the back of my mind.

The room falls into silence for a few minutes and then Rachel speaks.

"So, should we give you some tips on seducing him?" Everyone starts laughing and I shake my head. Leave it to Rachel to break the seriousness of the conversation with something pervy. I should have known she'd be determined to get back to that particular topic.

Rachel keeps going before any of us can say anything else, "Because, fears aside, girlfriend, he is definitely interested in you. He's so jealous of your friendship with me he set up that kiss earlier just to prove a point, stubborn ass." Rachel mumbles this last part, and then starts giggling again.

Emily and Kim again exchange looks before glaring at Rachel. I can hear Emily whisper to Kim, "I think it's time to put the wine away."

Kim nods, grabbing the nearly empty wine bottle on the table, topping off my glass before running to the kitchen.

Rachel huffs in frustration but jumps right back to our previous topic as soon as Kim returns, "So what are we working with here? You've given him a few hand jobs?"

"Not hand job_s_," I blush brightly. Despite the wine, I'm still embarrassed admitting to these women just how little experience I have, "Just one 'hand job', as you call it. And I don't even know if he liked it. I mean, I've never really-"

"Did he come?" I'm shocked to hear Emily of all people ask this question.

"Um, yeah, I mean, yes, he definitely came," I can't help remembering what it felt like. It was such a turn on knowing I was able to help him just like he was helping me.

All three women say in unison, "He liked it!"

We all erupt into a fit of giggles, the timing of their responses perfect. Emily becomes serious once again, looking at Rachel and Kim, almost getting their approval, before turning back to me, "Lillah, we were all in your boat when we started our relationships with our guys. None of us had much experience with men. We didn't know what we were doing."

"Definitely no clue. But, one thing about these guys," Kim is smiling, I'm guessing remembering some shared experience with Jared, "they want us to enjoy ourselves. They will sacrifice their enjoyment for ours. But if you push back, either by standing your ground or just flat out seducing them, they will let you help them, and you can both have a _very_ good time."

Rachel is smirking, "I don't know about you ladies, but when I first saw Paul naked, I about ran screaming. I knew there was no way that thing was going to fit. Now. _Ungh._ I can't get enough of him. Hell, after the bonfire, we couldn't even make it to the bedroom. He bent me over the couch and took me right there. So damn good," Rachel pauses and sighs before continuing. "I might have to have a repeat performance when he gets home tonight."

"I really hope you disinfected the couch after," Emily smirks at Rachel.

"Oh please!" Kim jumps in, "You are SO not one to talk Ms. Prim-and-proper-Emily. Remind me again," Kim says innocently, placing a finger on her chin, "where was Eli conceived?"

Emily grins, broadly, "Mmm, my favorite place, the kitchen table. There is something about Sam finding me in the kitchen. He gets so worked up; we can't make it to the bedroom. The kitchen counters work too, just the right height. You are right though, Rachel, first time I saw Sam, oh no, there was no way that thing was coming anywhere near me."

I'm a little shocked, but also a lot turned on, remembering one of my dreams in which Embry finds me in the kitchen cooking. I woke before it got too far but the thought of making love on the kitchen table had never even occurred to me, suddenly, I'm intrigued.

"The kitchen table? Really? Does it- aren't they- How does Sam not break it?"

Emily sighs before grinning, "I have no idea, but I don't care."

When Emily opens her eyes again, she looks over at Kim, "Want to share with us where you think this little one was conceived?"

"In our bed you dirty girls!" Kim's grin turns wide, "Or maybe up against a wall."

"Oh! Wall sex!" Rachel eyes are wide with excitement, "So fucking hot, especially if you can go down on him first, or, even better, if you face the wall and he takes you from behind."

Kim, rolling her eyes at Rachel turns back to me, "The point is, none of us knew what we were doing when we got together with these guys, but obviously, we've learned a thing or two over the years."

"So, you were all- virgins? And are all the guys, uh, well endowed?"

"Yes and oh lordie yes," Kim is grinning. "We are pretty sure it's a wolf thing. Proportional to their human bodies and all that. Since they all shed their clothes when they phase, they've all see one another naked. Our guess is they are all pretty equal in size, so there can't be any 'comparisons'."

"Even though there are still comparisons," Emily says. "I swear Eli is going to start calling Quil 'pencil dick' since Sam calls him that all the time."

Kim starts giggling again, "By the way, thanks, Lil! You confirmed what we all suspected. Other than Seth and Jake, we now know that all of the guys are uncut. I assume they both are too, but no proof, yet."

"I hate to admit I know this, but he is my little brother, Jacob is uncut. Rebecca and I used to pretend he was our baby and would change his diaper to help out mom. And please, can we NOT discuss Jake anymore tonight? Or, ever." Rachel pleads, pretending to gag.

"Why were you even suspecting?" I just can't understand this fascination.

"Because Rachel is an idiot," Emily laughs, "and wants to compare notes so that she can be 'certain' she got the most endowed wolf."

Rachel shrugs, "Not my fault you bitches are jealous of my man!"

"Oh please," Kim is rolling her eyes at Rachel, "believe me, I have NEVER been jealous of your man."

"Same." Emily says, also rolling her eyes.

All three look at me. I play with my friendship bracelet, before taking the last sip of my wine. I look up at Rachel and smile, "I've been jealous of your relationship with Paul, how close you two are and how you just seem to _fit_; like two puzzle pieces. But I've never been jealous of your man. He's too much for me."

"Oh, so Embry isn't as well endowed?" Rachel is snorting she's laughing so hard.

"Rachel! That is not what I meant and you know it!" I again fiddle with my bracelet, thinking about touching Embry last night. "Embry - mmm, he is definitely more than enough for me. I mean, my hand barely fit around it. That's good right?"

Kim nods as the other two giggle, "It's very good, Lillah. Sounds right in line with the other guys."

"I wish you could see how you and Embry looked earlier," Rachel straightens up as she calms down again, a vague smile on her face, "talk about two puzzle pieces that just seem to fit together."

"I agree, when Embry pulled you to him, it was like you sank into him, like you were finally home," Emily is smiling as she speaks.

Not wanting to think about what is being said, I look down at the friendship bracelet. I tug it off then twist it a few times to fashion a ring like Embry's. When I slide it on the ring finger on my right hand Rachel gasps, pointing at my hand. "That's it! That's what was different about Embry! I knew something was different but I couldn't figure it out."

"Different?" I'm still buzzed from the wine, so I really have no idea what Rachel is talking about.

Emily gasps as well, "Oh my God, Rachel you're right!" Grabbing my right hand, Emily pulls it into her lap, "Lillah, what is the deal with this friendship bracelet? Why did you just make it a ring? Why was Embry wearing a ring earlier that looked just like this bracelet of yours?"

"Oh shit," I gasp as the words escape my mouth. I quickly cover my mouth with my left hand to prevent any further leaks of swear words.

"Isn't that the same bracelet you were wearing at the diner the first day we met?" Kim is peering over Rachel's shoulder to see the bracelet, "The one Embry was so fascinated by when you two had that weird moment."

I nod slowly, not trusting myself to speak yet. Emily laughs, shaking her head, "Sweetie, we've all heard much worse, don't worry about swearing. The guys try to behave around us, but sometimes, they slip, and it rubs off. Even Claire has yelled an occasional 'damn it' when she can't get those Barbie clothes on just right."

I move my hand, speaking slowly, "I found this bracelet in my Lucky Charms box last Saturday morning and thought it was cute, so I put it on. When Embry saw me at the diner on Sunday, for some reason he started playing with the bracelet."

"Ok, so that explains your bracelet," Rachel says, though her words are starting to slur together, "but how does Embry have the same bracelet and why is he wearing it like a ring?"

"I gave it to him. Or, more accurately, I gave it back to him. When he came over last Sunday with my jacket, we got into an argument after we kissed," I leave out the part about the argument being about my thinking I was asleep. "Before Embry left he tossed another friendship bracelet, one that looked exactly like the one I was wearing, on the coffee table. He made a vague comment about us liking the same cereal."

"Oh!" Emily smiles, remembering something based on her far off look, "Yeah, Lucky Charms are his favorite, I forgot about that. Huh."

"Anyway, the bracelet stayed on my coffee table until this past Sunday night. After dinner we were talking, I offered him the friendship bracelet back, to um- solidify our new friendship," saying this now, telling these three women about that moment, it feels silly. I'm embarrassed I ever thought it meant anything at all.

"So why a ring?" Kim asks.

"It wouldn't fit on Embry's wrist as a bracelet. I wasn't going to push, but I suggested a ring instead and he really seemed to like the idea. It's silly, I know."

"It's not silly," Rachel says, "but I think it's more than just a symbol of friendship, for both of you."

"Rachel," Kim speaks quietly, but there seems to be a warning to her tone.

"What? She needs-"

Emily speaks over whatever Rachel was going to say, "It's not silly, Lillah. But for Embry to be tied to you, even if it's just a friendship bracelet or ring, it means a lot. Him wearing the ring shows there is someone that shares it with him. He cares enough about you to symbolize your friendship by wearing a ring. Don't take this lightly, Lillah. Embry might be saying 'friends', but I have a feeling there is more to that term than you would normally associate with it."

I shake my head, "I hope you're right, Emily, but I can't get my hopes up. For now, I'm going to enjoy my time with a _very sexy_ friend of mine."

Emily looks at her watch, "Speaking of time, it is way past girl and boy's bed time."

My heart sinks; I know I'm too buzzed to drive. I don't think Rachel would mind me crashing here, but I want to see Embry. I'm sure I could call or text him, but I hate to bother him.

"Emily, are you ok to drive?" Kim asks cautiously.

"Oh yeah, I sipped, unlike the other two, who guzzled. Lushes." Emily is giggling before looking over at me, "I'm going to pick Sam up at the shop on the way home, need a ride, Lillah?"

My poor heart starts pumping double time again, excited knowing I will get to see Embry after all, "That would be great! You don't mind?"

"Nope, but you have to carry Eli out to the car without waking him!"

I can't help my giggle as I help the girls to clean up. Emily and I go to Embry's old bedroom where Claire and Eli have fallen asleep on the little twin bed, Claire's hand reaching up to hold on the Eli's hand in their sleep. I can see the picture of Embry and his mom and my stomach twists when I realize once again Embry only has the pack as family.

"I'm going to pick up Claire first, she should let go of him once I have her in my arms, but you might need to pick up Eli at the same time."

I nod at Emily's whispered instructions. Following her lead, as soon as she starts to pick up Claire, I pull Eli to my chest and pat his back lightly. He whimpers once then settles down again as his head rests on my breasts.

Emily giggles as we walk out of the room, "Eli is like his daddy, he's a boob man. That was one of Sam's favorite parts about me being pregnant; the girls grew, a lot."

I whisper, "Ugh, I can't imagine mine getting any bigger."

"I'm sure Embry wouldn't mind."

My stomach starts flipping; holding a sleeping Eli and discussing being pregnant is not a good combination to my buzzed brain. I once again see the picture of me pregnant in my mind, Embry leaning down to kiss my swollen belly. Needing to clear my mind, I whisper back, "Doesn't matter, it's not going to happen."

"Never say never."

I don't respond as we reach the living room. I'm a little sad to see Kim and Rachel standing at the door ready to help us load the kids in. I don't want to end my time with them, but the excitement of getting to see Embry is too much. _I miss him already._

We manage to get both Claire and Eli into the car without waking them. Rachel pulls me to her, hugging me tight before whispering, "I'll call you in the morning to make sure he doesn't let you miss work."

"Don't worry, Embry's responsible, he wouldn't let either of us miss work," I can't help rolling my eyes at Rachel.

Before I'm barely free of Rachel, Kim is hugging me. I can't help smiling as I whisper, "Congratulations again, Kim. You are going to be a great mom."

"The way you just handled Eli, you're going to be a pretty fabulous mom yourself someday, Lillah," Kim is grinning again as she pulls back.

I shake my head slightly but don't respond. Emily walks over and gives me a quick hug, "I know I'm driving you to the shop, but I have a feeling you're going to be too focused on seeing Embry when we get there to remember to say goodbye to me."

"That wouldn't happen, Emily!" The butterflies in my stomach start fluttering at the thought of seeing Embry again, and I know she might be right.

I blush and all three women giggle at me, Emily shaking her head, "It's ok, Lillah, we don't blame you, we feel the same way about our guys."

"But he isn't-"

Before I can say anything further Kim shakes her head, "Doesn't matter what you two call yourselves, you are connected. Enjoy it."

"OH!" Rachel covers her mouth as she starts giggling, "We forgot the point of getting together, the family dinner."

"Crap!" Emily looks at Rachel and Kim and laughs, "The normal?"

Kim grins and nods, "The normal works."

"Works for me," Rachel shrugs, laughing.

"What's the normal?" I suddenly feel like an intruder to this little group, they are already so well established.

"You are the guest of honor, so you aren't bringing anything other than yourself. The 'normal' is bring a dish you know your man loves and a dish you like. Appetizer, entree, side dish, or dessert."

I stomp my foot, knowing I'm acting like a child but not liking this plan, "No! You three can't make everything. I want to bring something."

Rachel rolls her eyes, "You are bringing something. You are an amazing addition to our group, let us celebrate that!"

"Plus, for the first time, Embry is excited about a get together. You being around has started to make him enjoy being a part of our little family. I think he likes showing off for you." Kim's smile is infectious and I return it easily.

"Fine, but I still want to bring something, other than myself and a more social Embry," I'm still buzzed and snort at this thought.

Emily grins, "Ok, then bring your favorite dessert."

I look at Rachel and grin briefly before blushing and looking away, "I don't think caramel sundaes are appropriate for a family dinner. But I'll think of something."

"That's your favorite dessert? Is that a recent favorite, like since Friday night?" Rachel is glaring at me.

I shake my head and climb into the passenger's side of the van, waving, "Nope, been my favorite all my life.' Night."

Emily closes the door after me. I lean my head back against the seat but I can see Emily, Rachel and Kim huddled together, talking briefly. I want to open the door and ask what's going on, but I don't, trying to respectful of the secrets I know they still have to keep from me. I let my eyes close as I listen to the soft breathing of the two children in the backseat. Eli snores lightly and I have to hold in my giggle, but I can't keep the smile off my face at the adorable sound.

I hear Emily open the driver's side door and start the car, "You awake over there?"

"Yep, just listening to the kids sleep."

"This is when I like them best, when there isn't any screaming. They are almost precious. Times like this I'm almost willing to consider having another baby."

My eyes pop open and I look over at a smiling Emily, "Are you-?"

"No! But of course, Sam wants me to be. He's dying to have another, he hated being an only child," Emily looks over at me for a brief second.

"Yeah, I understand where Sam's coming from, it was kind of lonely growing up an only child. I at least had my cousin; does Sam have any other family?"

Emily smiles sadly, "His mom still, but his dad, well, he wasn't a great man, unfortunately."

"I'm sorry to hear that."

Emily smiles wide, "Don't be, Sam and I aren't. Sam is a wonderful husband and father, and that's all I can ask for. If not for his father, I wouldn't have Sam. Everything happens for a reason."

"That's a very positive way to look at a bad situation," I sigh, wishing I could be as positive as Emily.

"Sweetie, if you let it, life is nothing but a bunch of bad situations. You have to find the thing that brings you the greatest joy, what makes you happy and willing to survive the crap life throws at you. For me, that's Sam. He's my world. As long as I have him and our little family, including you now, I can take anything thrown at me."

Emily stops the van and I look up, realizing we've made it to the shop. Emily leans over and gives me a brief hug, whispering, "Now go spend time with Embry. I have a feeling he might be what makes you most happy in this world. In the end you always want to be with your best friend."

"Is it weird that Embry's really has become my best friend? We barely know each other."

"Not weird at all. Sam is many things to me, but at the base, he really is my best friend. That's a great starting point for any relationship."

I smile and nod, hugging Emily again before climbing out of the van, waving as I close the door as quietly as I can. Turning toward the shop I can't help the grin that spreads across my face at finally getting to see Embry again. I walk as quickly as I can without tripping over my own feet in my buzzed state. As I open the door to the shop the butterflies take flight again in my stomach at the thought of spending the rest of this evening with my best friend.

**A/N:**How awesome is this group of imprintees? Don't you just love the scheming that you know is taking place between Kim, Emily and Rachel? They are such sneaky girls. Next chapter will be Embry's POV of his evening with the guys and Lillah's arrival at the shop. See you next Tuesday!


	20. Chapter 20 Pull Me Down Hard

**Chapter 20 "Pull Me Down Hard"**

**Disclaimer:** Not SM. Pretty sure she wouldn't appreciate all the dirty things we have her characters do. Come on, would you really expect SM to have talk of sex on the kitchen table? That's what we thought.

**A/N:** Still with us? Last chapter we had girl time. Now it's some good guy bonding, plus Lillah and Embry quality time. We would warn you about not reading while at work, but really, who would listen to us? We won't keep you waiting. Enjoy!

_So come on, get higher, loosen my lips  
Faith and desire and the swing of your hips  
Just pull me down hard  
And drown me in love_  
"Come On Get Higher" - Matt Nathanson

**EPOV**

My phone is ringing before I even have time to pull on my jeans. It's Jacob, of course. The slacker ditched patrols today, which was fine with me; it gave me time to think. I'm sure he would have wanted to kill me if he had patrolled, I couldn't stop replaying the past twenty-four hours over and over in my mind.

I put the phone to my ear, grumbling when I answer, "I'd better not hear one word from you when I need to skip patrols."

"Amazing how imprinting makes you want to skip patrols. And no, you won't hear anything from me, unless there is an emergency, but that's not why I'm calling."

"What, did you miss my voice?"

I can hear Jacob's laughter over the phone, "You wish. No, I wanted to check, do you still have that extra set of welding gear?"

I'm surprised by his question; it's definitely not what I was expecting. "Yeah, I think so, probably buried in my old closet over at Paul and Rachel's."

For the first time since I moved out of my mom's home at the age of eighteen, I'm suddenly struck with the need to actually move everything out. To clean out that room. I don't know why I haven't yet, other than there was always an "excuse". When I first moved out, I didn't have time because Sam and Jacob still had us on high alert. About the time that calmed down, my mom discovered she had breast cancer. Then, after she passed, I just didn't want to be in the house. I was happy to sell it to Paul and Rachel. They needed their own place, and I had no desire to live there ever again.

But now, I wanted to clean out that room, to make a fresh start. Besides, I know that as soon as Paul and Rachel get married, they will want to start thinking about kids, and they'll need the space.

"Would you mind if I borrowed it?" Jake's question pulls me back into the phone conversation.

"Yeah, that's fine, but why? Don't you have a set of welding gear at the shop?" I had bought my gear before the change happened, to help Jacob out while he was rebuilding the Rabbit.

"I do, it's not for me. Stop by the shop when you can, I'll explain then. All the guys are meeting over there; beer and pizza since the girl's are having a 'ladies night' to plan the family dinner."

"Why they need to throw a dinner to plan for a dinner I will never understand," I roll my eyes and shake my head. "But ok, I'll run by Paul and Rachel's now to grab the gear, I'll meet you at the shop shortly."

"You know all the imprintees are already over there."

"I know. Your sister needs some payback. I need to show her who really influences Lillah," I growl out. I'm still irritated by how she acted yesterday, but if I'm honest with myself, I'm also just being a cocky SOB. _Lillah is mine._

"Oh, I can just see this turning ugly quick. I hope you make it out alive, Rachel might kill you."

"It's a chance I'm willing to take; besides, you are my reason for showing up. She might come after you too."

"I hate you."

I'm laughing as I press the button to end the call.

-0-

I tap lightly on the front door before walking in to Paul and Rachel's house. As I walk in I see Rachel and Kim in the living room, giggling over some shared joke.

Rachel is shouting before I've barely closed the door, "NO! Embry you are not allowed here! This is my time with Lillah, I left yesterday when it was your time, and you need to leave!" She pouts out her bottom lip like a small child. _Brat._

"Rachel! Calm down. I'm here for Jake. He needs to borrow something, so I just stopped by to pick it up. Promise, I'm not trying to interfere with your girl time." _Lies._ I'm grateful for the excuse to see Lillah and to prove to Rachel that even though Lillah doesn't know what is going on, she'll always pick me over her. Plus, I want to see her again, make sure she is ok after seeing me phase earlier.

Rachel narrows her eyes, almost like she knows I'm not telling the whole truth, "What does Jake need that you have to pick up?"

"My old welding gear." Before Rachel can open her mouth I raise my hand to stop her, "Stop, I don't know why. He's going to explain when I stop by the shop to drop it off to him."

"Hmph!" Rachel does not like this answer, obviously, but it's not like I care.

Kim giggles looking over at Rachel, and then turns to me, "I assume Jake will be sharing with all the guys tonight, including Jared. What are you guys doing?"

"Nothing special; beer, pizza, and pool at the shop. I hope to kick Jared's ass tonight, he's up three games on me, that isn't cool."

Kim grins proudly, "I don't think you'll kick his ass, but good luck."

"Thanks, I'll be right back. Where's Lillah by the way? She's here, right? I saw her car out front."

"She's with Emily." Rachel mentions, a little too casually. Instead of worrying about Rachel's ulterior motives, I make a beeline down the hallway.

I stop cold in my tracks when I get to the doorway of my old bedroom. Crammed into the tiny room are Claire, Eli, Emily, and Lillah. They are all sitting on the floor, Emily and Lillah with their backs to me. While Emily and Lillah are distracted by Eli, Claire gives me a tiny wave and a smile.

I start to wave back when I see Eli dive for Lillah, giggling as he cups her face with his chubby hands. She places her head against his little neck and kisses his skin. I feel like I've been punched in the gut, the sight before me completely overwhelming.

First, just Lillah being in my old bedroom is bizarre. I can't decide if I want to yell at her to get out or take her on the grand tour of my childhood room. Granted, I haven't lived here in four years, but seeing her surrounded by _my_ stuff, in _my_ room, it feels right in a weird way, but still unnerving.

Second, Lillah holding Eli gets me _every_ time. It never fails to amaze me how right Lillah looks with a baby in her arms. She reminds me so much of Emily, like she was born to nurture. But when I see her holding Eli, all I can think is: _That should be OUR baby she's holding_. And that shit both freaks me out and excites the hell out of me.

Third, here, in this room, set up just like it was all my life, I feel like my mom is going to walk around the corner any moment now. Even though I know she's gone, I can still feel her around me in this room. Thinking of Mom, I'm suddenly saddened that she'll never get to meet Lillah. I'm pretty sure Mom would have loved her, if for no other reason than she loved to cook too. Most of my childhood was spent in the kitchen, either watching Mom, or, as I grew up, washing the dishes as she cooked. We were always a team.

I clear my throat, both to help pull myself out of my thoughts and to announce my presence. Lillah looks shocked to see me and Emily starts questioning me immediately. I use the excuse of needing to pick up something for Jacob, but it comes off awkwardly, as I'm still trying to come to grips with Lillah being here, in this room.

Lillah and I make eye contact briefly, however, for the first time; I'm the one that looks away first. I can see how confused she is, but I can't answer her questions right now, not without telling her everything. When she returns her focus to Eli, I step into the room.

I barely take two steps before Claire is launching herself into my arms, "Uncle Bry!"

"Claire Bear!" I turn Claire upside down. As always, Claire manages to make me smile, her laughter infectious.

After carefully setting Claire back on the floor, I turn to the closet, pulling out the bag of welding gear. I take a brief look in the closet to see if there is anything else I need when I spot a shoe box on the top shelf. Setting the bag of welding gear down on the bed I reach for the box I haven't seen or thought of in nearly three years.

When Mom found out her breast cancer was so far advanced, she started preparing things. I had already moved out, but I spent as much time with her as I could. I stopped by for dinner one night and she presented me with this shoe box. My mom didn't have much, so her affairs were already in order, _depressing as that was_. Mom informed me this box contained everything she ever valued in her life, other than me. I hated that my becoming a wolf had separated us so much, but I knew through all the fights, Mom never stopped caring.

When I opened the box I was amazed at all the little mementos my mom had saved over the years. Almost everything was from my childhood: a lock of hair from my first hair cut, drawings, a couple of report cards, silly gifts I'd given her for Mother's Day and Christmas. All lovingly cherished.

Also in the box was a small silver necklace with an oval locket attached. My mom wore the necklace as long as I could remember; I was so accustomed to it being there I hadn't even noticed it was no longer around her neck. When I asked, she smiled sadly and told me she wanted me to have it. "Maybe you'll luck out and the girl you fall in love with will have an 'L' in her name. If not, give it to her to show her you love her."

My finger slides over the engraved 'L' on the front of the locket. Even though Mom's name was technically Nayeli, everyone that knew her called her Lee. I don't have to open the locket to know engraved on one side is Mom's name and on the other side my name. I pocket the necklace, not considering the significance of my mother's words. I can't think about it while I'm here in this room. I put the box back on the shelf and grab the bag from the bed.

Emily, Lillah and I leave the kids to play in the room. I let the women walk ahead of me but my hand automatically reaches out for Lillah. I need to feel her, even if it is just touching her lower back. I feel the tension seeping out of me at the simple contact. I also hear her exhale slowly, like she's been holding her breath. Her hand reaching out for the seam of my jean leg nearly stops me.

Unfortunately, just as she reaches out for me, we are walking into the living room. Rachel is yelling at me to get out before I barely round the corner from the hallway. I do my best to ignore Rachel and the other imprintees comments, leading Lillah to the front door.

I'm aware of the women around us but I don't care. I need to feel Lillah and I want Rachel to understand that I'm Lillah's number one priority, not her.

I drop the bag of gear and pull Lillah to me. After everything I saw in that bedroom, I need this connection with her. I need to prove to myself that at least on this level, she is mine. When our lips connect all thoughts are erased from my mind except for my need for this woman. I'm learning as this 'friendship' progresses, I can't get enough of her. I feel myself growing hard and I need to share it with Lillah, make her feel what she does to me just by kissing.

I use the opportunity of Lillah's gasp at my growing erection to further explore her hot little mouth. After running my tongue along her bottom lip, and biting just a little, I pull back slowly. Placing my mouth against Lillah's ear I explain I'll be at the shop tonight, I hope she stops by afterward.

Lillah starts to pull away from me but I need to give her one last reminder. I move my hands until they are cupping her ass, squeezing and pushing her hips forward so she can feel how much I want her.

Releasing Lillah, I give my goodbyes to the room. As Lillah rights herself, I reach out, brushing my finger against her rosy pink cheek. Needing to go before I take her back to that old bedroom, I grab the bag of welding gear and leave. I can hear the women giggling before my feet even step off of the porch and a smirk spreads across my face.

-0-

"Embry! Your timing is perfect; I was just about to do the big reveal." Jacob, along with Sam, Jared, Paul, and Quil, are grinning when I walk into the shop.

"The 'big reveal'? We've all seen your junk; I'd call it more of an 'average reveal'."

Jacob flips me off, "So how'd it go at my sister's house?"

Paul perks up, "You went by the house? You interrupted Rachel's time with Lillah? You do have a big pair to go up against her. You _know_ she's pissed about you kicking her out of Lillah's house yesterday."

"I know her drunk ass started in on me as soon as I walked in the door. It's your future brother-in-law's fault I was there." I toss the bag of welding gear at Jacob, "Why'd you need this stuff anyway?"

"You are actually the reason why I needed it." Jacob is grinning from ear-to-ear.

"Man, Jake, I don't have time to take on a side rebuild."

Jacob smirks, "Not you actually helping me, I get it, your poor little tiny brain can only focus on Lillah right now. But you're the one that gave me the idea."

"Embry actually gave you an idea? That has to be a pack first," Jared is laughing at his own humor. He's the only one laughing.

"Embry's now up on you in giving ideas, Jared. You've yet to produce one." Sam grins at Jared before turning back to Jacob, "So, why did you call us all here? Because I have yet to see beer, pizza, pool, or the point."

Jacob grins again, "Seth is picking up the pizza, he should be here shortly. The beer is in the cooler like always, pool table is ready and waiting, and the point is right over here."

I follow Jacob as he walks over to a tarp covered vehicle in the back of the shop. I look at him, still confused, "I still don't get how I'm the reason why you needed the welding gear."

"You gave me the idea," Jacob smirks at me, "when you were bragging on your imprintee the other day."

Jared elbows me, "Bragging on her already? What did she do that was so cool it inspired Jake to get a piece of junk?"

I shrug, "Let's not get in the habit of calling Lillah my imprintee. And like you're one to talk, Jared. You used to brag on Kim when she'd draw 'cute little hearts' on her notebook at school."

Jacob barks in laughter, "Oh God! I'd forgotten about that. We'd be patrolling and all I'd see from Jared are these hearts. _So_ don't miss that shit."

"Awesome. Thanks for the trip down memory lane. The fucking point? I'm starving," Paul is getting surly without food.

Jacob pulls the tarp back to reveal a piece of shit that can barely be called a car, but has the outline of a Mustang from the sixties, "The point is, Embry was telling me about Lillah rebuilding her classic Camaro with her dad. The reason I needed the welding gear is because this is going to be Ness' eighteenth birthday present."

Sam is surprised, "Wait. Lillah rebuilt the Camaro? Just her and her dad? Damn, she is perfect for you. Quil, you're fired."

"Shut the fuck up, Sam. How am I going to support Claire if I don't have a job?" Quil is glaring at Sam. Sam enjoys threatening to fire Quil, I think primarily because he knows it bothers Quil, it's his way of pissing him off.

Sam shakes his head, "Don't know. Don't care. If Lillah rebuilt that Camaro, she has to be a hell of a lot better mechanic than you ever will be."

"Don't worry, Quil. Lillah prefers teaching, for now. Although I did tell her if she ever decided to quit teaching, I was sure Sam would hire her," I grin at Sam.

Sam elbows me, "Yeah, only problem is, if I hired Lillah, I'd have to fire you too, Embry."

"What the fuck?" Sam has never threatened to fire me, so I'm surprised.

"You'd be punching all the male customers for even looking at her," Sam, along with the other guys, chuckle at this comment.

I try to picture Lillah in blue coveralls. The image that pops into my head makes me smile, especially the idea of her not wearing anything underneath those coveralls. But then I see some prick walking up to talk to her. Sam, Paul, Jacob, and Quil all double over in laughter when they hear the growl escape my lips.

"Fine, you're right," I reluctantly admit.

Sam claps my shoulder, smiling knowingly, "Of course I'm right, I have the most experience dealing with a smoking hot imprintee that all the guys stare at. Trust me, Emily has had to back me down a few times over the years."

Paul nods, "That is true. Rachel loves going out, but it is torture for me. All I see are assholes checking my woman out."

"Think how I felt when Kim was gone away to school. All I could see in my mind were these nerd doctors hitting on her," Jared grumbles.

"Alright, we all have to deal with jerks looking at our women. Except Quil and Jacob, of course. So why are you giving Ness her birthday present eleven months early?" I'm puzzled by the timing.

Jacob shrugs his shoulders, "I don't know, I thought it would be a great way for Ness and I to spend time together. She could come by the shop when Edward releases her from her 'school'. We could spend a few hours working on it every couple of days. By the time we finish, I figured it would be about time for her birthday again."

"Pizzas here!" We all turn to see Seth walking in, a shit eating grin on his face. "Did I miss anything?"

I have to laugh at Seth's timing, "Just Jake showing off the piece of shit care he got for he and Ness to rebuild together. A Mustang, right Jake?"

Jacob turns to me, nodding, "Yeah, it's a sixty-six."

Seth's eyes go wide, "Really? A car? To rebuild. Huh. Uh, that's cool man."

"What took you so long with the pizzas?" Jacob glances at Seth curiously.

"Hmm? Oh, long line, sorry man. They frown at orders of ten pizzas. Think you are up to no good. Where's the beer?"

Seth puts the pizzas on the table near the cooler, pulling his cell phone out. He grins at the screen, types a quick response then pockets the phone.

"New girlfriend, Seth?" Jacob, having noticed Seth's actions, questions him.

"Me? Nah. I've taken over Embry's role of the bachelor wolf. Just my mom." Seth says and busies himself, twisting the top of his beer, downing it in a few gulps.

Jacob narrows his eyes, but doesn't push any further. "So, who's up for pool? I'm ready to kick all your asses."

-0-

"So then I bend her over the couch-"

"Stop!" Jared shouts over Paul, "Just because Jacob, Seth, and Quil left does not mean we want to hear about your latest sexual adventure with Rachel."

Sam takes a swig of his beer, not seeming to be bothered by this conversation, "Paul, you have not told me one thing yet that Emily and I have not done. Now, have you tried the kitchen table?"

"The kitchen table? I've thought about it, man, but I'm always concerned about it holding my weight." Paul steps back from the table, grabbing his beer.

Sam lines up his shot, "Oh man, Emily fucking loves the kitchen table. I'm pretty sure we conceived Eli on that table."

"Thanks Sam. How many times have we all had meals at that kitchen table?" I cringe at the thought of eating at a table that Sam and Emily have had sex on.

"Ugh," Paul cringes, "I did not need the image of your bare ass-"

Sam punches Paul on the shoulder, "Take your shot."

"I do not want to hear what you and Emily have done," Paul, Jared, and Sam have been exchanging stories for the last twenty minutes or so.

"I notice you haven't shared anything yet, Embry. You still planning not to sleep with Lillah?" Jared almost looks sympathetic, but also relieved to shut Paul up.

"You are a fucking moron. How can you deal with the urges?" I can always trust in Paul to be blunt.

"Forget about him, how the hell are you dealing with Lillah? She's a hot little number and I'm guessing, even though she doesn't know yet, she is becoming more aggressive with you."

I grind my teeth, knowing Sam is right. As Lillah becomes more comfortable with me, my resolve not to have sex with her is weakening. I don't know what I'm going to do if she pushes further. "So far, she doesn't know what's going on, she just thinks she's attracted to me."

"When are you going to tell her, man?" Jared, still looking sympathetic, takes his next shot.

I line my shot up, "I'm not. There is no way someone as perfect as she is could ever love me."

"Have I mentioned you are a fucking moron?" Paul shoulder checks me as I stand up from my shot. "Because you are a fucking moron. Just tell her, let her make the decision if she could love you. Shit, you're already in love with her."

I finish off my beer before responding, "I'm not in love with her. It hasn't even been two weeks since we met."

"I fell in love with Emily the first second I saw her." Sam is barely focused on his shot as he speaks.

Paul nods in agreement with Sam, "Exactly, I fell in love with Rachel the moment I saw her. It's an imprinting thing, but also, she is the perfect woman for you, of course you would fall in love with her."

"How many other women have you phased in front of?" Sam asks me, knowing the answer.

Jared's pool cue doesn't even touch the white ball as he stares bug-eyed at me, "You phased in front of her? On purpose?"

"I wanted her to be more comfortable with the whole phasing thing," I line my shot up, sinking two balls into the pockets. "Besides, you've all phased in front of your women."

"Only after they knew we had imprinted." Paul points out.

I grab another cold beer from the cooler, "Ok, but it's not like this thing with Lillah is normal. She wasn't supposed to know about us in the first place. We are discussing her now because you phased in front of her." I point at Paul, who glares at me before taking his shot. "It freaked her out. I just want her to feel comfortable with that side of me."

Sam interrupts our near argument, "She knows, it is what it is. Embry, whether you want to admit it or not, you are falling for her. Trusting her enough to phase in front of her is huge."

Jared snickers, "Almost as huge as finally letting her touch your dick."

As Paul and Jared laugh their asses off, Sam snorts, "Man, Embry, you may have been able to control your thoughts before, but when it comes to Lillah, you are a fucking open book in wolf form. Glad to see you at least let her touch you finally."

"Against my better judgment." I'm grumbling, hating hearing that I'm unable to control my thoughts. _I need to work on that._ I don't want Lillah embarrassed by these assholes and I certainly don't want them to 'see' her the way I do. "Jesus, all I can think about when I'm with her is fucking her, claiming her, making her mine. It fucking _sucks_."

Jared sobers up and nods in understanding, "That's the imprinting, man. And the more she's into it, the harder it will be to resist. It's our natural urge to want to have that physical connection."

"And remember," Sam jumps in, "the point of imprinting is both a reward for the sacrifices we make as wolves, but also to carry on the line. That pull to be with her is both the love, as well as the need to create the next generation."

I don't respond as I hear a car pull up. My heart is racing as I wait to see if it really is Lillah. I hear the front door open and I'm hit with her scent. When I turn toward her my lips form a smile without me even thinking about it.

Lillah is looking around hesitantly, but grins shyly when she sees me. When she approaches, I pull her tight against me, kissing the top of her head, as I whisper quietly, "I've missed you."

Lillah doesn't comment but I can feel her chuckling against my chest. I pull back slightly until she looks up at me. I slowly brush my lips against hers, just needing to feel that connection again. I can taste the wine on her tongue as we kiss. I don't know if she's drunk, but she is definitely more relaxed than earlier tonight.

Before I can get lost in Lillah's lips I hear Paul mutter behind me, "Fucking moron."

I flip Paul off but don't break my kiss with Lillah. I can tell she is eager to continue what I started earlier as her tongue slides along my bottom lip. I wrap my arms around her waist, easily dragging her up my body, lifting her from her feet. One of Lillah's hands fists the back of my shirt as she buries the other hand in my hair, tugging gently. When her tongue flicks across my top lip I can't contain the growl, parting my lips more to gain access to her mouth. My tongue easily finds hers and I tease her, gently stroking my tongue against hers.

_Lillah has completely sucked me in. I want to show her everything I'm feeling for her, what I can't say; how she is now the centerpiece of my existence. I am putting everything I have into this kiss, and amazingly enough, I feel like I'm getting the same thing back from her. _We are so engrossed in our kiss, each giving the other all our passion, fire and need, neither one of us hears anything going on in the shop until Sam barks out the 'wolf call' to get our attention.

I slowly slide my tongue along her bottom lip, not wanting to break our kiss, but also knowing the sooner we end this, the sooner the guys will clear out. _Then I'll have Lillah all to myself._

I drop several quick kisses against Lillah's closed mouth as her body slowly slides back down mine. I know she can feel my hard cock as she brushes against me. I feel Lillah shiver as the front of her jeans meet mine. She is once again blushing all over. All I can think of is how beautiful she looks when her entire body is flush from orgasms. Watching her cum for _me_ is the most amazing sight.

I know Lillah can see the desire in my eyes when she looks up at me, I don't try to hide it, wanting her to know how much I need her, not just right now, but every moment of every day. We stare at each other for a few seconds, neither of us moving or saying anything, until Lillah looks away. She looks so adorable, blushing over our kiss that I can't resist myself, leaning down to kiss the side of her neck again, just like I did earlier at Rachel's house.

Lillah's sigh sounds happy and content, so I feel comfortable returning to the guys. I give her a cocky grin which makes her smile and shake her head at me. I cup her face in my hands and kiss her forehead before pulling myself away from her. I keep a tight hold on her hand and lead her over to where the guys are still standing around the pool table. I stop behind Lillah, wrapping my arms around her waist and pulling her back to me. I feel her shiver at the contact but don't say anything, instead leaning down to whisper, "Anything these idiots say, Lills, ignore them," I lift my face to glare at them, "Guys, be nice."

Sam nudges Paul before grinning at Lillah, "So, how bad was it? Did Rachel tell you about Paul bending her over the couch?"

Lillah looks up at me then back at the guys, who are now howling with laughter. I can feel the flush underneath her clothes, but before I can shut the guys up Lillah speaks up, "Rachel told me about that and so much more. Rachel is very drunk and told us all lots of stories."

I can see Paul go slack jawed, not expecting this response from Lillah, but she isn't done yet. She turns to Sam, speaking evenly, "Emily's outside waiting for you, but she also shared, telling us how Eli was conceived. I'm surprised the kitchen table held up for you two."

I am shocked beyond words. First that she said anything, second that she said THAT. Sam is surprised too, but recovers quickly, elbowing Paul in the gut. "I told you, Emily fucking loves that table. Come on guys, let's give these two some privacy. Embry, mind locking up? See you at seven in the morning?"

Recovering from my shock I nod at Sam, "I'll be here to open while you patrol. You don't trust me boss?"

"It's not that I don't trust you," he looks pointedly at Lillah then back at me, "I've just been there. See you tomorrow. Paul, Jared, go home to your women." I can tell by Sam's tone he just gave a command as their Alpha. I nod in thanks at Sam as they pass by.

The guys say goodnight to Lillah as they shuffle out. Sam says goodnight, but pauses next to me, whispering so Lillah cannot hear him, "If you aren't already, that kiss just now and that ring on your finger that matches her bracelet tells me you are falling in love with her. Don't fight it. She is yours for a reason."

I don't respond to Sam. Neither Lillah nor I say anything until the door of the shop closes. Nearly simultaneously, we both speak, "What the hell was that about?"

I release my grip on Lillah, going over to the cooler to grab another beer, "You want one?"

"I'm pretty buzzed already, but after tonight, yeah, I think I'll take one." Lillah takes the open beer from me and drinks it greedily. "Me first. What was with that tone Sam used? And what did he say to you before he left?"

I grab her free hand, leading her away from the pool table, "Sam just gave them a command to leave. As for what he said, he was just commenting on my ring. Come on, let's walk and talk. I'll give you the grand tour."

"Alright. Thanks for the beer, it's not bad. I still prefer wine," Lillah smirks as we walk through the shop. "What do you mean 'command'? And what did he say about your ring?"

"A command, as in Sam just ordered them to leave, as their Alpha." I don't mention the second part of her question, hoping she will forget.

Lillah looks puzzled, "So you guys aren't all in the same...uh, what do you call your groups?"

"Packs? No, technically Jacob has his pack and Sam has his. But, we have mended things now, so we can communicate again. But, officially, Sam is still Paul and Jared's Alpha, they decided to stick with Sam when the split happened, so he can give them orders."

"Ok. So what did Sam say to you before he left?"

I hesitate, not wanting to say too much, "About the ring? Nothing much, just that he noticed."

Lillah lets the point go with an "Oh". Continuing to walk through the shop, I point out a few vehicles we are working on, including Jacob's big present for Ness, "But you can't tell her anything before Jake does."

"I get it, promise Embry. That's really sweet of him. How'd he get the idea?"

I grin looking down at our intertwined fingers, "I told him about you and your dad rebuilding the Camaro."

Lillah looks shocked. "You did?"

"I did, and when Sam found out, he was ready to fire Quil and hire you. But I told him you love teaching too much." I decide not to tell her about Sam threatening to fire me for wanting to punch guys if they looked at Lillah. _She doesn't need to know that just yet._

"I do love teaching," Lillah's eyes light up. She looks up at me, "So what was your 'What the hell?' all about?"

"You, talking about Sam and Emily on the kitchen table. Where did that come from?"

Lillah blushes and covers her mouth with the hand still holding the beer, trying to keep the laughter in, "Emily told me about it tonight. I thought it was appropriate, but I've had a little too much wine tonight, so I may not be the best judge of what is appropriate right now." Lillah breaks our hand holding to run her fingers slowly over my t-shirt covered chest, "Kim and Rachel also shared some- information. Rachel told us about Paul bending her over the couch. That was pretty interesting. Sounds like you guys are rather, uninhibited."

I'm trying not to think about sinking down to the floor to show her how uninhibited I can be. Instead I try to rationalize with her. "Lillah, baby, I think you are a little drunk. How about I take you over to my place to sober up?"

"You'd let me see your place?" Lillah's eyes light up and she grins up at me, "I'd like that. I liked seeing your bedroom earlier."

I mumble under my breath, "Not as much as I liked seeing you in my old bedroom earlier."

"Hmm?" Lillah is swaying to some song in her head, her eyes closed as she moves her hips in slow circles as she continues her exploration of my chest.

I shake my head, "Nothing. You ready to go?"

"Wanna play a game of pool?"

I'm shocked by this question, "Uh, yeah, sure. You want to play pool?"

Lillah nods her head and then grins. I don't know what she is up to, but I can't wait to bend her over the table and show her how to use the stick. Thinking about that soft ass of hers against my dick I know this may not be the best plan, but it sure is going to be fun. I grab her hand and pull her over to the table, handing her a pool stick. I grab a beer for me and rack the balls up.

Once everything is set up, I wave my hand, offering her first break. Lillah smirks then shakes her head, "You start us off. I'll just watch you."

I lean over the table, taking a little longer to break than normal, trying to focus on the game and get myself under control. The balls clank together loudly and begin bouncing around the felt table top, two of them sinking into a corner pocket, one after another. I stand up and look at Lillah, smiling, "We'll just ignore the rules and take turns shooting."

Lillah gives an odd smirk-laugh combination before walking closer to the table and eyeing it thoughtfully. As she examines the table, she speaks softly, "I didn't mean to run the guys off."

"You didn't; we were just goofing around until you girls were finished. I'm sure they'd rather be with their imprintees instead of me anyway."

I walk up behind Lillah, touching her lower back gently, "Do you need me to show you how to hold it?" I'm aware of the double meaning of my statement and I hope she catches on.

Instead, Lillah shakes her head and I step back, giving her room to lean over the table and slide the pool stick across her fingers. I'm too engrossed in watching her hips and ass to pay any attention to her shot. I look up, surprised when I hear a loud thwack of the balls against one another.

When I look, I notice Lillah has managed to sink a number of the balls I had left on the table with my initial shot. I clear my throat, raising my eyebrows when Lillah turns to face me, "What was that?"

Lillah looks at me, innocently, "What? That? It was nothing."

"Nothing? I hardly call that nothing," I say, stepping closer to Lillah. "You didn't tell me you can play."

Lillah cocks an eyebrow at me, "You didn't ask."

"True."

"You assumed I couldn't."

"You're right, I did. I should know better than to assume anything about you," I'm nearly in front of her now, grinning at the turn of this little game we are playing.

"You should," she agrees.

I'm standing directly in front of Lillah, her body just far enough away from mine so I'm not touching her. As I look down I can see her skin is now covered in goose bumps. "It's kind of sexy, seeing you bent over the table, handling a stick."

Lillah's eyes grow wide at my words; the combination of her being buzzed and the desire we both felt from our kiss earlier spurs me forward. I step back and move around the table to take my shot. My eyes do not break their connection with Lillah's as I lean over the table to take my shot. It sinks into the target perfectly and I straighten up, pulling off my t-shirt and throwing it on a nearby chair.

"You going to strip down?" Lillah asks, but her tone implies she's teasing, so I feel comfortable teasing back.

"If you want me to, sweet Lillah. I'll do anything for you."

Lillah bites down on her bottom lip, resting her stick against the edge of the pool table and glancing around the garage.

"Well, we are alone," she says shyly, then smirks.

I'm surprised by her willingness, "Lillah. Really?"

"Mmm," she hums, not really giving me an answer.

Lillah pulls off her jacket and folds it before laying it on a tool chest. She walks around to the end of the pool table and takes her shot, angling it too wide, on purpose I'm guessing. It glides down the center of the table and bounces off of the side, missing every other ball on the table. She sighs and gives a very dramatic pout at having missed. _She's spending too much time with Rachel_.

She steps away from the table and gives me room for my next shot. As I step forward, she removes one shoe. I eye her cautiously and shake my head, "You're serious?"

Lillah doesn't give a reply, she just shrugs and points to the table.

We take turns, missing on purpose and only removing bits of clothing. One shoe. One sock. A watch. A belt.

When Lillah has removed all non-essential clothing, she reaches for the buttons of her shirt. I close my eyes tightly and inhale, both wanting her to remove her shirt and not wanting it to happen. The sound of shifting fabric forces me to pop my eyes back open. All I can do is stare at her, my eyes going wide when she places her shirt on top of mine on the chair. The bra that she is wearing is sheer and pink; it is my undoing. She's so sexy and natural; my cock jumps in response.

I move very slowly, methodically leaning my pool stick against a wall before turning toward Lillah. My movements are controlled and tight, trying not to scare her with how much I want her at this moment. I stop in front of Lillah and place my hands on her hips. I lift her up and she automatically wraps her legs around my waist as I walk us over to the pool table. When I sit her on the edge of the table she doesn't release her legs from around my body. Instead, she tightens them, pulling me closer to the juncture of her thighs. My hands move from her hips, up her sides, tenderly gliding along her soft skin to the swell of her breasts.

I drop my head down so that my lips touch hers softly, my hands slide over to cup her breasts and I run my thumbs over each pebbled nipple, teasing them with light strokes. Lillah presses her chest into my hands, a small moans escaping her mouth.

I break our kiss and squat a little until my face is eye level with her pink lace covered breasts. I look up at her, grinning like a silly high school kid before leaning forward. I move one hand from her nipple down to her waist. Lillah whimpers at the loss of contact, but her whimper quickly turns to moaning as I place my mouth over her puckered nipple. _Heaven._

Not forgetting her other breast, I squeeze it gently, testing its weight in my hand before rolling her nipple between my thumb and forefinger. Lillah gasps my name and rotates her hips against my already straining hard on. Her movement makes me growl against the fabric of her bra; I pull back slightly and blow gently across her wet fabric, grinning when I see her nipple tighten, further.

I reach behind Lillah and shove the few remaining pool balls across the table. A couple go bouncing to the floor while the rest of them sink into the pockets. I press Lillah back against the pool table with my body, kissing a path between her breasts and up to her neck. She arches her back when she hits the soft felt table top, pressing her chest up into mine. Lillah runs her hands up my sides and around to my back, pulling me down until I'm close enough that my chest is touching her breasts.

I move down her neck and across her collar bone before returning to her mouth. My kiss is urgent against her lips and we both sigh in unison. I reach back to unlock her ankles from around my back. Her legs fall on each side of me, cradling my body with hers. I run a hand up one of her denim covered legs, gently massaging her thigh as I go higher. Lillah rolls her hips beneath me and I can feel her grin against my mouth when my chest rumbles with pleasure at the sensation. My free hand slips up her stomach and back to her breasts while I release her mouth, kissing and lightly sucking down her neck.

"Lillah. Sweet Lillah. I want to taste you. ALL of you."

Lillah's reaction is swift, lifting her hips to press against me as she tugs my hair to pull me up to her lips. She mumbles as she kisses me, "I- Yes, please Embry."

Not needing any further encouragement, I break our kiss, pulling back from her. Lillah whimpers at the loss of contact, but I grin at her gasp when I quickly pull off her jeans and look up. Lillah is sprawled across the pool table wearing only a pink lace bra and pale pink panties.

"You are so beautiful," I'm unable to contain my words when I see her laying against the table, open for me.

Lillah smiles, biting her lip when she looks up at me. Sitting up slightly, she wraps her arms around my neck, pulling me to her. She whispers against my lips, "You are beautiful too, Embry; both like this and as a wolf. I couldn't stop thinking about you today."

Lillah is blushing bright pink at this statement and I'm honored she's being this honest with me, "You've been thinking about me?" I run my fingers across the edge of her panties, over her hip and thigh, "Does it make you wet when you think about me?" She bucks her hips pushing her warm pussy towards my fingers, which makes me grin.

Lillah whispers, "Yes. I've never- I've never been like this before, Embry."

"Me either, Lillah." I reach behind her to unhook her bra, freeing her breasts. Gently pushing Lillah to lean back against the table I slowly explore her upper body with my mouth. Allowing my tongue and lips to move down her neck, nipping at the spot where her neck meets her shoulders, "You taste so sweet right here, Lillah."

Moving lower, I focus first on one breast, teasing the other with my free hand. The sounds that are coming from her are spurring me on to lavish her breasts with my attention. Lillah has a tight grip on my hair and when I lift my head to move to her other breast, I can't help my grin when I see my woman enjoying herself so much. When I don't automatically move to her other breast, Lillah's grip on my hair tightens and she starts pushing my head toward where she wants me. I shake my head gently and I see her eyes pop open. She's biting down on her lip and its one of the sexiest things I've ever seen, "Patience, baby. I'm having my dessert, and I want to enjoy it."

I can see Lillah shiver, but she doesn't fight me. Starting at the lowest point I draw slow circles with my tongue around her breast. Moving higher up with each pass I can feel Lillah's breaths becoming pants. As my tongue approaches her nipple her hands are once again tightening in my hair. Taking her nipple deep into my mouth I can feel as well as hear Lillah's moan. When I pull back I drop kisses all over her breast, "Sweet and luscious."

"And these," I press my lips over the other nipple, grinning, "so beautiful. Begging to be in my mouth."

I take the nipple into my mouth, lapping it with my tongue. Lillah is gasping, "Ah- mmmm- Embry!"

I kiss down from her nipple, over her breast to her stomach, "But this, I love this part, it's smooth and silky. Perfect," I slide my hands over the slight swell of her stomach. "So beautiful."

Moving my hands over her sides and down to her hips, I kiss all over her stomach as I gently pull her panties down her legs. When I look up, my Lillah is spread before me on the pool table. I will never be able to look at this pool table without getting hard, but this moment makes it worth it. Looking up at her, I try to control my emotions when I see the worry in her eyes, "How is it every time I see your luscious body it looks even more beautiful?"

Lillah's blush covers her whole body quickly. She doesn't quite meet my eyes but she is smiling. After a few seconds of me admiring her beautiful body, Lillah is squirming again. She hooks a leg around my thigh, pulling me forward.

Understanding what she wants, I lean forward, covering her body again with mine. I can feel her moving her hips just slightly, my jean-covered erection throbbing even more at her movement over me. Kissing her briefly, reminding myself this is for her, I pull back, kissing a direct path from her mouth to just above her bikini line. Ignoring where I want to taste her most, I move down her thigh. This causes Lillah to gasp.

Her sounds make me smile, I gently nip at her thigh before responding, "Something you want me to do, Lillah?"

"You keep teasing me, Embry. It's not nice."

"Is that so?" I bite down a little harder on her other thigh. Lillah purrs deep in her chest before propping herself up on her elbows to look at me.

"Yes it's so."

"So is there something you want me to do?"

"Please stop teasing me, Embry." Lillah's eyes are pleading, but she stumbles over her words, "I can't- I need you to- please, Embry?"

"Please what, Lillah?" I again bite harder, leaving a mark this time, "Do you want me to bite you harder?"

"Yes, and-," Lillah moans as I bite with the same pressure on the other thigh.

I move back up to her breasts, pinching both her nipples between my thumb and forefinger, "Pinch harder, Lillah?"

Lillah sits up straight, gasping, "Yes! God yes, Embry, and-"

I move to her earlobes, sucking one in my mouth, then moving to her lips, whispering against them, "Suck harder?" I tug her bottom lip into my mouth, sucking gently.

Lillah pulls back, her breathing erratic, "Yes, yes, yes, and I want you to- please, Embry- taste me. I, I want your lips against me." Hesitating for a moment, Lillah moves her lips against mine then whispers as she grabs my hand, leading it towards the juncture of her thighs, "Here, Embry. I want you to taste me here."

I slide one of my fingers into her, testing how ready she is. She nearly comes off the table, throwing her head back as she screams, "God, yes. Please, Embry!"

Pulling her hips forward, I kneel again, kissing and nipping across her thigh. Lillah rests one leg across my shoulder as I spread her thighs apart, opening her to me. Unable to resist, I swipe my tongue over her, from the lowest part of her I can reach to her clit, paying special attention to her most sensitive spot.

Lillah nearly comes apart. She is gasping and moaning, her hands gripping my hair and tugging my head, pulling herself forward. Her breasts are just above my head. Grinning, I lift my head up and tug a nipple into my mouth, biting down gently.

"Ahhh! Embry, killing me- need you! Please...," Lillah is so close already.

"Did I tease you too much before, baby? What turned you on so much?"

Lillah nods, "You! Mmmm, your two kisses in front of everyone. Plus- girls talking about what they do with their guys. It made me- want to try- please Embry!"

I pump two fingers into Lillah as she speaks, her hips erratic against my hand. I slowly pull my fingers back. When Lillah whimpers, I finally dip my tongue into her.

"Oh! _God_!" Lillah is screaming like I've never heard her before. It is the sexiest thing I've ever heard.

I use my thumb to tease her clit as I slide my tongue in and out of her. I can already feel her walls tightening around my tongue as I lick and taste as much of her as I can, "You taste so fucking amazing, Lillah."

I brace myself by gripping the table. Her thighs keep brushing against my hands, as she opens herself up more to me. She is pushing me closer to her, moaning at all the sensations attacking her body. Moving my tongue to her clit, I again slide two fingers into her. As I suck her clit into my mouth, I feel her tighten around my fingers. "Are you close, baby?"

"Yes, little more."

My tongue returns to her as I gently pinch her clit with my fingers. She is so close already. She's so wet, so turned on and her pussy tightens around my tongue. It doesn't take much more to send her flying. I feel her body pulsing around my tongue. It's the closest I think I will ever come to my dick being in her and I want to remember every detail of it.

After I have lapped up everything I can, I stand, leaning over her, as she is laying back on the pool table. I whisper, "You are so fucking gorgeous. Ok if I kiss you?"

Lillah nods then pulls me down by my neck, licking at my lips, then nipping at my tongue, "You are pretty fucking gorgeous yourself. And talented. I never knew it could be that- fucking good."

I have to laugh, "You need to stop hanging out with me, you are starting to curse. I thought you were innocent, Lillah."

"I'm still mostly innocent." Lillah sits up, wrapping her body around me. "Are you ok? Need some help?"

"I'll survive until we can get back to my place. Come on, you need to sober up and I need to take care of a little problem."

Lillah snickers as she gets dressed again, "Not little, nope definitely not little."

I roll my eyes at her, helping her into her jacket as I pull my t-shirt back on. I throw both of our empty bottles in the garbage can then pull her hand into mine, "Come on, let's lock up."

Before we can make it out the door I can't help but pull her to me again, kissing her deeply, slowly, passionately. I want us to share as many moments like this as we can. I wrap my arms around her and hug her close before ending our kisses.

"Come on, baby. Let's get out of here."

I lock up the shop and help her into my truck. Lillah curls herself against me for the short drive to my place, as I back out of the shop parking lot, I notice my truck is the only one there, "Where's your car, Lillah?"

"Buzzed driving is drunk driving. Emily just sipped her wine tonight, so she dropped me off on her way home. Candy is at Rachel's." Lillah frowns as she rests her head against my shoulder, "You don't think Paul and Rachel would have sex in my Camaro, do you?"

"They'd better not." I respond, not vocalizing the other half of my thought. _I want you and I to be the only ones that have sex in that car._

-0-

**A/N:** Sorry, StupidLeeches aren't available right now. NiceKittyRAWR and WolfH00r can presently be found on Twitter or at their local pool halls searching for their own Wolf Charming's. Leave a review and they will get back with you as soon as possible. Thanks! BEEP!


	21. Chapter 21 Give Up Forever

**Chapter 21 "Give Up Forever To Touch You"**

**Disclaimer:** WH & NKR. Not SM. We like our wolves dirty. Yum.

**A/N:** Still with us? Good! We won't keep you waiting with a silly warning about not reading at the office. You should just assume it at this point! Enjoy!

_And I'd give up forever to touch you  
'Cause I know that you feel me somehow  
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be  
And I don't want to go home right now_

_And all I can taste is this moment  
And all I can breathe is your life  
'Cause sooner or later it's over  
I just don't want to miss you tonight_

_And I don't want the world to see me  
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand  
When everything's made to be broken  
I just want you to know who I am_

"Iris" - Goo Goo Dolls

**LPOV**

Embry is leaning over me, his beautiful smile lighting up his entire face. _My Wolf Charming._ "You are so fucking beautiful. Ok if I kiss you?"

The things Embry can do with his tongue, the heights he just sent me to, amaze me. I can't help but giggle at the memory of him tying the cherry stem into a double knot the other night, especially considering what just happened. This was definitely not part of my plan when I suggested we play pool. I just wanted to have some fun, not quite ready to go sleep off the alcohol I've consumed tonight; we were playing and teasing but when I removed my shirt, everything changed. _Embry changed.  
_  
_He moved slowly, gracefully, but with a purpose. It was like the raw animal power I saw when he phased today was suddenly in him, and I was his very willing prey. Seeing the power that he so often hides from me was exhilarating. The second his hands touched me, I melted._

The alcohol helped, but I know Embry is the reason why I'm becoming more- comfortable with my body and vocal with what I want. The way he looks at me, speaks to me, talks about my body; it makes me feel beautiful, like he really is attracted to me. Hearing him call my body his 'dessert' almost made me laugh, but it also turned me on beyond belief. I want to be that sexy woman he described; I want to be able to seduce him. This game of pool was a good first step. 

I nod quickly and pull Embry down to me. Wanting to thank him for this amazing moment, I run my tongue over his lips. When his tongue flicks out to meet mine, I can't help nipping at it. It's odd tasting myself on him. With Embry it doesn't feel dirty, it feels natural, but I'm still surprised he was so willing to bring this pleasure to me. _I have to stop comparing him to Carter._ The more I'm around Embry the more I understand he would never treat me with way Carter did.

I grin as I let go of his lips, "You are pretty fucking beautiful yourself. And talented. I never knew it could be that- fucking good."

"You need to stop hanging out with me, you are starting to curse. I thought you were innocent, Lillah," Embry is laughing as he pulls away from me.

I follow him, sitting up and pulling him back to me. I don't want to let him go, not yet.

"I'm still mostly innocent. Are you ok?" I look up at him. I'm hoping he'll let me touch him again, though I still can't directly ask him _that_ question.

"I'll survive. Come on, you need to sober up and I need to take care of a little problem."

My heart stutters at his response and I can't help the snicker that escapes as he calls it a 'little problem'. According to the girls, and what I've managed to touch, it's definitely not little. I'm surprised when I whisper out this last part; I chalk it up to the alcohol. Embry's eyebrows shoot up at me but he doesn't comment on it. I get redressed, swaying slightly on my feet, but I'm not sure if that is from the wine, the beer, or the orgasm. _Probably the orgasm._ _I can't even imagine what it would be like if we were to actually have sex. Amazing. Mind blowing. Ruin me for any other man's touch. No, that's already happened._

I'm so lost in my thoughts I barely realize he's walked me to the door of the shop. He kisses me sweetly before he locks up and helps me into his truck. Once he's settled I can't help but to lean against him. He wraps his arm around my shoulder and it takes everything in me not to close my eyes and fall asleep.

When he asks about my car I giggle as I respond, but I'm suddenly struck with the realization that my baby is at Rachel's house, and that Rachel was very turned on when I left. In my inebriated mind I vaguely recall the girls discussing their love of having sex in different places earlier. I glance up at Embry, "You don't think Paul and Rachel would have sex in my Camaro?"

"They'd better not." His response is surly and he growls it out, sending a shiver up my spine. I don't know why he'd get so upset about that when it's _my_ car.

I'm so comfortable, but I don't want to fall asleep on the way to his place, so I force myself to sit up. This makes Embry frown, "Lillah, sleep. We'll be there shortly."

"Nope. If I fall asleep you'll just tuck me in like you did on Saturday," I pull the arm that is across my shoulder down a little further, resting my head on his bicep while I play with his fingers. "You don't play fair like that."

"Play fair? You have my hand dangling in between your boobs and _I_ don't play fair?"

I lift his hand I'm playing with to my mouth, turning it over so I can place a brief kiss on his palm, "I don't hear you complaining."

Embry kisses the top of my head, but I can feel the laughter in his chest, "No complaints, just hard to focus on the road when you are near. Worse when you willingly place my hand near one of my favorite spots on your body."

"You're a boob man!" I snort out, remembering my conversation with Emily.

Embry shakes his head but doesn't say anything as he stops the truck. I move to follow him out, but before I reach the edge of the seat, Embry scoops me up into his arms, "Embry, I'm ok to walk. You should put me down."

"I don't know, you were doing a bit of swaying before. Besides, we're in now," When I look up, he's opened the door to a small duplex.

Embry turns on a light then sets me down on the couch. He kneels in front of me, our eyes at the same level. He pushes my hair behind my ears then cups my face so gently I can't stop myself from sighing, closing my eyes and enjoying the feeling of his warm hands on my cheeks. I look up when he clears his throat, there is a small smile playing across his lips, which makes me smile, "What? Is my hair that much of a mess?"

"No, you look amazing as always. I was just going to respond to your 'boob man' comment. I'm not."

I raise my eyebrows at him, "You are too."

"Nope." Embry is shaking his head, smiling before leaning forward to kiss me gently, "I'm a 'Lillah man'. I like every part of your body. Every inch of you turns me on; your hair, eyes, lips, neck, shoulders," he continues his list even when I blush and playfully shove his shoulder, "tits, hands, stomach, hips, ass, thighs. What's between those thighs," Embry wiggles his eyebrows and I can't help but giggle, "knees, calves, ankles, and feet. And every other part of you from the tips of your toes to the top of your head."

I don't know how to respond. I want to tell him that's exactly how I feel about him, but I don't. Instead, I blush and look away, but I do manage to squeak out, "Thank you."

"No. Thank _you_ for sharing that beautiful body with me. Thank you for allowing me to have a part of you tonight," Embry leans back and smiles again, "Now, let's get some food in that stomach of yours so you don't get sick."

I lean my head back, "I'm not hungry, Embry."

"I know, Lills, but you need some carbs to absorb the alcohol. I'm guessing you didn't eat much at Rachel's based on how buzzed you are."

"I ate a little."

"Sure sweetheart," all these little pet names he's calling me are killing me. It's too precious and I want more, but I don't want to get addicted, since I know I can't have him forever like I want.

I hear him mumbling as he walks out of the living room, "I could kill Rachel for letting her get away with drinking that much and not eating."

I shake my head but don't say anything. My eyes are getting heavy so I force myself to sit up and take stock of the tiny living room.

When Embry comes back carrying a glass of water and a plate in his hands, I look up, questioning him, "Puzzles?"

Embry looks down at the coffee table, smiling as he hands me the glass and a few pills, "Drink up and take the aspirin. I don't want you upset with me in the morning for a headache," he watches me take the pills and swallow them before continuing.

"My mom and I used to do puzzles all the time. They were something cheap for us to do together. I don't know, I enjoy working on them, it clears my mind."

I move a few pieces around that don't yet have a home, smiling, "I like puzzles, it's like putting the Camaro together, everything has a specific place."

"Yeah, I suppose," Embry hands over the plate, which has a sandwich and a few chips on it, "Sorry I don't have more food here, but this will at least get some carbs and protein in you."

I don't even try to argue, because when it comes to food, Embry somehow always wins, "Don't be silly. This is perfect." I take a big bite of the sandwich, surprised at how hungry I am. As I'm chewing, Embry just smiles and watches.

"So you told me what stories Emily and Rachel shared tonight. What about Kim? What did she tell you?"

My face turns bright pink but I'm excited to share the news with Embry, "Kim told us about how she thinks she got pregnant."

"Pregnant?" Embry looks confused, shocked, then excited, "She's pregnant?"

"Well, she doesn't know for sure yet, but I guess Jared told her? How does _that_ work?" I pop a chip in my mouth, hoping Embry will explain.

"I don't know. I never noticed anything different about Emily when she was pregnant, but Sam swears it was obvious. Maybe it's something to do with her being his imprintee. Or he's just that in tune with her body."

"Hm. Maybe. That's pretty cool- and a little bit freaky," I pause and consider what Kim must have thought when Jared made his prediction. "She didn't even have a chance to surprise him."

"Kim, you mean? Yeah, same thing happened with Emily and Sam."

I sit quietly, nibbling on my sandwich and chips while I mull over this new bit of information.

"But," Embry smirks at me, "It's kind of funny and ironic if you think about it. Usually the woman is the first to know, but with our crazy wolf senses, we guys figure it out first."

I laugh at his logic and shake my head after, surprisingly, I place the last bite of my sandwich in my mouth. I notice the soft expression on Embry's face and realize I've just eaten without him. "You weren't hungry? I should have shared with you."

"Nah, I'm good, I had practically an entire pizza by myself. I just like seeing you enjoy your food."

Embry takes the plate from my hand and I watch as he places it on the coffee table. I'm still not completely accustomed to this; him being this sweet with me, always trying to make sure I'm eating and taking care of myself, and taking over when he thinks I'm not. I imagine this is how he was with his mother and I know he treats the imprintees, plus Eli and Claire, with the same consideration. I know Embry is a good man with a good heart, but it still surprises me how good he is to _me_.

He turns to me, smiling softly and I'm once again struck by his good looks. When his smile grows, my heart stutters. This man really is the full package; kind, wonderful, strong, and as a bonus, so handsome I have a hard time keeping my eyes off of him. I return his grin then lean my head against his shoulder. Embry exhales and I can feel his lips brush the top of my head before he speaks, "Come on, let's get you to bed."

I playfully argue with Embry but I finally concede. I'm surprised when he lets me walk, but he keeps a firm grip on my hand as I follow him to his bedroom. When he leads me into the small room I look around, taking in the sparse furnishings. There's a bed almost as big as the room with a navy comforter covering it and a couple of fluffy pillows at the top. There's a night stand next to the bed with a lamp and what looks like the remains of an alarm clock placed on top. A large dresser stands next to me and I can see a door to what I assume is the bathroom. The room is nice and tidy, but I don't notice any personal items. There aren't any photos in the room, just a watch which I've never seen Embry wear and other miscellaneous things. I know Embry is a very basic person and the room seems to fit him completely, but I'm a little sad for how empty his life appears to be.

Embry takes me by the arm and pulls me over to sit on the edge of the bed. He's pulled his shirt off and I can't help but gaze at his beautiful, toned skin. He chuckles and I glance up at him, blushing at being caught staring. I reach my hand out to touch his skin. I know that it will be hot before I even glide my fingers along his abs.

"You are so hot," my lips mutter before I can stop them. Embry takes my hand and runs it up his chest, pulling me up from the bed, while he steps closer to me. My mouth is dry but I try to moisten my lips with my tongue. When I do this I feel a rumble in Embry's chest and I can't help but giggle. Obviously, even with the food he's fed me I am still a bit tipsy. I should be embarrassed at myself, but I'm delighting in trying to push his buttons.

"Lillah," he growls my name unlike I've heard before and I look up at him innocently. Before he can stop me I lean up on my tip toes and press my lips to his. I don't have to initiate anything else. Embry increases the pressure on my mouth and I open my lips to accept his tongue. I sigh into his mouth and shiver a little when Embry pulls me to him. He tastes my bottom lip with his silky tongue and I sigh into his hot mouth. I press my body closer to his, wanting to feel him against me. When I shift my hips Embry hisses but doesn't stop the kiss. Instead of slowing and letting up he increases the pressure.

I'm engrossed in Embry's kiss, but eventually I have to pull my mouth away from his just to catch my breath. Before I can go back to his lips, Embry sits me back down on the edge of the bed.

He steps back, grinning, but there is something in his eyes, like he's once again holding back. He walks over to the dresser, pulling something out of his pocket which he puts away in a top drawer, then pulls out some clothes from a bottom drawer. He sets a pair of shorts and a t-shirt beside me while holding onto a pair of boxers, "You can change into those, if you'd like. I'm going to take a quick shower." Embry leans forward and slowly brushes his lips across mine, "I'll be right back, just have to wash up and take care of some things."

"Some things?" I know what he means but I'm hoping he'll actually say it. I wish he'd let me touch him, it's not fair that he won't let me help him out. I haven't really wanted to in the past but with him, I'm craving it. _I hope it's not because I'm bad at it. _I know the girls told me earlier that if he came, he enjoyed himself, but those doubts still linger for me.

Embry stops at the door to the bathroom, leaning against the frame with a devilish smile on his face, "You know, but I'll give you details if you want. I'm going to take a shower so I can get myself off while I think about you. You were so fucking sexy on that pool table; it won't take long, trust me."

I feel my entire body shake as images of a naked Embry pleasuring himself flash across my mind. A thought crosses my mind and I have to hold back a smile as I stand from the bed, arms crossed when I look at Embry.

"Embry, you aren't a boob man, right?"

"Right, I'm a 'Lillah man'," he reaffirms.

I slowly round the bed, "And you're going to go take a shower to take care of your 'issue'. While you are doing that, you are going to think about me?"

"Yes," he almost looks as if he's going to blush.

"While I'm here, in your bed, thinking about wanting to touch you," I near the other side of the bed, standing just a few feet away from Embry now.

"Lillah, it's not-."

I cut him off before he can finish, finally speaking one of my worries to him, "And just to be clear, it's not because I touched you wrong last night, right?"

"God no! It's just, Lillah, I'm not in control right now. I'm so hard; it won't take much to send me over."

"Ok, but you said you're that way because of what we did earlier, because of me."

"Yes, I told you the other night, you are the only one that causes- this."

I nod once then look up at him, resolving myself to saying this, "Then why won't you let me help you? If I cause it, and you're a 'Lillah man', then I should be able to help my man with the problem I caused." 

"What?"

Remembering his reaction earlier, as I take the last few steps needed to reach Embry, I slowly unbutton my shirt again. I hear him growl as I step closer, letting my top slide off my shoulders. When my nose is almost against his chest, I reach up, pulling his head down to me. I slide my lips over his as I whisper, "Please, Embry. Let me help you instead of taking care of it on your own. I want-"

I close my eyes and exhale slowly before speaking what's on my mind; "I want to touch you again, Embry. I want to help you."

"Fuck."

I laugh, the response falling off my tongue without me thinking about it, "I'd like to do that too, eventually, but I'd be happy just touching you tonight."

"Woman." Embry is growling but he wraps his arms around me, pulling me tight against his chest, "You are going to kill me."

"I certainly hope not. I'd like to keep you around for a while longer. I enjoy what you do to me too much, especially your tongue earlier," I add the last part just to drive him a little more crazy. Or, I hope that's what I'm achieving with my words.

Embry groans, pulling me against him then spinning us both around. He pushes my back against the wall as his lips crash down on mine. I automatically wrap my legs around his hips, sighing into his mouth. A deep rumble travels through Embry's chest and vibrates against mine. His hands grip my hips, clutching me close to him, pulling my body tighter against his. I moan into his mouth when he slips his tongue in to touch mine. I can't get enough of his taste and the feel of him against my body. I am so close to losing it, to beg him to take me right here. In my still tipsy state, it seems like an excellent idea.

His lips pull away from mine and I give him a little pout, which he laughs at. He places a few kisses on my lips, keeping them light, giving me time to breathe. Once I've stopped gasping for air, Embry looks down at me, his brows knitted together, "You really want to? Because you don't have to if you don't want to. I'm capable of taking care of myself."

"I want to take care of you, Embry." Even in my current state, I know I mean more than just this current situation. I want to take care of him in every way possible. I want to be with him all the time, spend my life with him.

Still reeling from that realization, I barely notice Embry has moved us from the wall to the bed. When I look up at him, he's once again sliding my pants off. The giggle escapes from my mouth without me realizing, "Embry, I want to touch you. Why are you undressing me?"

"Because there is nothing sexier than having you naked in my arms as you stroke me."

"Wha-?" I gasp out because I have no reply for him. I have to remind myself to breath because I'm feeling lightheaded just picturing it. And then I feel him lightly kissing up my skin, starting at my thighs then moving over my hips, up my stomach to my breasts. Embry once again removes my bra, cupping my freed breasts in his hands before continuing his kisses up to my lips.

Embry sinks down lower onto me. I can feel he is still wearing his jeans. I pout before whispering against his lips, "Embry, why are you still dressed? I want to touch- feel all of you."

Embry drops a few kisses on my lips before leaning his forehead against mine, sighing, "Not completely naked, Lillah. I want you too much; I don't trust myself to be naked with you."

I'm surprised by my reaction to this admission. I know Embry wants me, but for him to admit that he doesn't trust himself makes me feel a little more powerful.

Embry has moved to the side of the bed, his hands at the top of his jeans. I move to the edge of the mattress, covering his hands with mine. I lean into his body, tilting my head back to look into his eyes, "May I?"

I can feel and hear the rumble in Embry's chest, but he nods before moving his hands to my head. As my hands move over the button of his jeans, he pulls me to his lips. I'm trying to stay focused on unbuttoning his jeans, but his lips are distracting. I can feel his erection under my fingers as I finally release the button and begin sliding the zipper down slowly.

Once I reach the end of the zipper, Embry's tongue takes over my mouth as he moves one hand from my mouth to cup my breast. Mimicking his hand on my breast, I push his jeans aside, cupping him through his boxers. I moan into his mouth and pull back gasping for air, but refusing to remove my hand.

Embry releases my breast, chuckling as he whispers against my ear, "Lillah, I need to take off my jeans."

"Ok."

Embry wraps his hand around my wrist, tugging it back, "I can't take my jeans off if you have a death grip on my cock."

"I don't- I didn't have a death grip on your-," I can't manage to choke the word out, especially since he's sliding his jeans off.

Once he has them removed Embry leans forward, pushing me back to the bed. He hovers over me, grinning wide. "What? You can say it," Embry's eyes are sparkling with laughter. "You had a death grip on my..."

I shake my head, feeling the blush bloom across my cheeks, "I can't say that Embry."

"Sure you can. Just tell me what part of my body you want to touch. You don't have to say 'cock', you can use whatever word you are most comfortable with, just tell me."

Embry rolls off of me, laying back on the bed, his legs stretched out across the mattress. His erection is more than obvious and my hands itch to caress him again. He keeps watching me; even after it's obvious I'm looking at his crotch.

I flick my tongue over my lips to moisten them then look up at Embry. I don't know why it's so hard for me to say this, but I look back down at his erection then look away from him as I choke out, "Dick."

Embry smirks then pulls me to him, "What about my dick?"

"I want to touch it."

"I want you to touch my dick," Embry grins wide which makes me laugh.

"You are enjoying this a little too much, Embry," I whisper as I move my hand slowly over his abs.

"I don't mean to tease you, Lillah, but you are very hard to resist, especially when you tell me what you want."

I push myself up his body, but leave my hand at the waistband of his boxers. I grin as I whisper against his mouth, "I don't get why you enjoy hearing me say words like 'dick'."

Embry barks out a laugh, "The same reason why I enjoy having you touch me. I told you, all of you turns me on, including hearing you say that. Now you know what it's like when you tell me what you want.

"In that case," my hand moves into his boxers, my fingers barely slipping under the elastic waistband before I find the tip of him. My breathing picks up and I feel my own reaction to being so close to him. My body is already throbbing in anticipation of touching him, and hoping he will touch me in return.

I can feel Embry's body convulse as I run one finger down his length. I smile up at him, "I take it I'm doing it right?"

"More than right. You touching me drives me wild, baby," I can see his jaw clench but his smile turns me on even more. His grin grows even wider, "How does it make you feel to touch me?"

I don't say anything for a few moments, letting my fingers move over his shaft, feeling the extra skin slide up with the pressure of my hand around him. I realize the girls were right earlier, Embry is uncircumcised. I don't really know the difference, so I'm trusting in his instructions. I tug the skin up over the head like he told me to do last night and I can hear him hiss.

"Sort of like that," I run my fingers back down to his base then repeat the pattern, tugging the skin up then sliding my fingers down. I nip at his chest before looking up at him, "One little touch from you and I feel like I'm teetering on the edge."

Embry has his eyes closed and his head leaned back but speaks through his teeth, "Are you as turned on from touching me as I am?"

"Mmmm. Yes," I'm surprised at the sound of my voice, almost like I'm purring, but it's the truth. Touching Embry turns me on just as much as having him touch me.

I'm so focused on my pattern with him I don't realize his hands have moved. I feel one of his hands cup my breast as the other moves down my back and over my ass, stopping at my thigh. I gasp when he lifts my thigh and moves my leg to curl around his. This new position opens me up to him I moan loudly, unable to contain my excitement at knowing he's going to pleasure me again, while I'm doing the same to him.

"I can tell how excited you are, Lillah. Your heart is pounding, your breathing is erratic, your hand keeps tightening around me," Embry leans down and whispers as he places his hand between my legs, "and I can feel how wet you are."

I can't contain my moan at Embry's words, "How can you tell all that?"

Embry doesn't say anything, just grins, pulling my mouth toward his. As his lips find mine, he slides a finger into me. I gasp into his mouth, tightening my grip on him more than I intend to. Embry pulls back from my lips, growling, "Fuck, yes baby! A little tighter!"

I adjust my body, needing to get as close to him as possible. I twist my hand so I have a better grip on Embry and can feel his fingers go ever deeper. I move over him at the same pace his fingers are moving in me. Our mutual sounds of satisfaction echo around the room, mixed in with panting breaths. He feels so good, touching me, filling me. I grow wetter, my clit burning for release and my stomach tightening. I know it's not going to take much. Even with the few times Embry has brought me to orgasm, I already know this feeling and I revel in it.

I press my hips down to grind on his hand and he presses his thumb against my nub, sending me over the edge. I open my mouth over his nipple, biting down as my orgasm takes over my body. Embry's chest lifts off the bed when my teeth sink into his skin. My hand stills around him and I feel him move his over mine. He's growling in my ear, "That's right, nearly there, Lils. Shit you feel so fucking good!"

He lifts his hips up to create friction for himself. His fingers are still moving in me, bringing me to another peak and I begin moving my hand again. He quickens our strokes then stops, letting go of my hand, growling, "Lillah, if you don't want to feel me cum, you need to move your hand, now."

I shake my head and lift my face to look at him. I want to share this part with him too. I want to feel him cum because of what I did, because of me. I grip his shaft tighter, "I want us both to- come," I gasp out the word, Embry's thumb finding my clit at that moment, "together, Embry."

He begins moving his hand over mine as he once again increases his fingers movements in me. His hips begin to pump up to meet our strokes and there is a low growl vibrating his chest. I grab his hair with my free hand, pulling him to my lips. Embry's hand stills over mine as he pulls back from my lips, "Short strokes, over the tip baby. God I love your hand on my cock."

"Yes! Embry- can't stop! Again!" My hands move against him just like he said until he pinches my clit, sending me into another orgasm. _How the hell does he keep doing that?_ My hand never stops moving over him even through my orgasm and I hear him moan, screaming my name as he finally cums against my hand.

We slow our movements as we both calm down. Embry pulls me to him, kissing me deeply, slowly. My mouth is slack, trying to draw in oxygen and Embry gently removes my hand from around his now flaccid shaft. He pulls my hand from his boxers and I feel his grin against my lips. He leans his head to the side and licks sweat from my neck before saying, "Come on, let's go clean you up before you pass out."

"I'm fine," I tell him. I'm wide awake now, adrenaline pumping through my veins. "How do you do that all the time?" I need to know if it's always like this.

Embry moves from the bed, easily picking me up. He carries me into the sparse bathroom that smells just like him. He sets me down on the counter top but holds me against his chest to keep me stable. I spread my legs, allowing him to step between them.

"Do what?" He asks as he turns on the water in the sink and grabs a bar of soap before moving my hands under the warm water.

"Make me have two orgasms all the time?" I want to protest, tell him to stop, I can do it myself, but him washing my hands is probably one of the sweetest things he's ever done for me.

He grins as he dries my hands with a towel, "I don't know, I've never done that with any other woman before."

I don't say anything, considering his words. _He's never done that with any other woman, and yet, almost every time we are together it happens for me._

He finishes cleaning both of us up and then once again picks me up and carries me back into the bedroom, "You know I can walk, right Embry?"

He places me on the bed before grabbing the clothes he put next to me earlier. He pulls the t-shirt over my head, grinning, "I know you can walk, I like carrying you."

"I guess it's a good thing you're so strong then."

"You are so stubborn," Embry pulls me to stand, kneeling to help me into the pair of shorts. When he tightens the drawstring on the shorts he places a small kiss on my stomach, "Being strong doesn't matter, you weigh next to nothing. I just like having you in my arms. Especially when you are naked."

I shake my head, "You are crazy."

Embry pulls the covers back on the bed and I happily crawl into the bed, reveling in being surrounded by his scent. He follows me into the bed, setting the alarm on his phone before turning off the light. Embry pulls me to him, and I immediately wrap myself around him, needing to be as close to him as possible in my sleep.

As I fall asleep I hear Embry whisper, "I am crazy. Crazy about you."

-0- 

I hear Embry speaking before I can manage to open my eyes. I know he's whispering, and I can hear him saying my name, but my brain isn't awake enough to process the words he's saying. My mouth feels dry and my stomach is rolling slightly. _Ugh, definitely no more beer._

I reach for the glass of water I keep on my bedside table but I don't feel anything. Slowly opening my eyes I see the problem. _That's not my bedside table._ Then I remember, Embry brought me to his place last night. When I turn to look at Embry, he hands me a glass of water then speaks into the phone, "Lillah's waking up- I know Rachel- I get it, I screwed up- Well you're the one who returned her to me drunk!" I can hear Rachel screaming at him on the other end, but Embry just calmly says, "We'll be there shortly- No, she won't be late, I told you! Goodbye, Rachel!"

He hangs up the phone as I drink as much of the water as I can. When he sets the phone down I realize it was my phone, "Hey!"

"I didn't want you to wake up, you looked so peaceful. I saw it was Rachel so I answered it. Be glad I did, she's in rare form. I'm hoping after she has some coffee she'll calm down."

I finish off the water and hand the glass back to him. He sets both the glass and the phone on the table next to him. I wrap my arms around his waist and lean my head against his chest, not wanting to move, but knowing I need to get home soon to make it to school on time, "What time is it?"

"Almost six, but don't worry, the reason why Rachel called was to tell me to bring you over to her place to get ready. She has clothes waiting for you."

I laugh at this, "I can't fit into any of Rachel's clothes!"

"Rachel said if you said you couldn't fit into her clothes I was to tell you to 'shut up' and to 'get your sexy ass' - her words, though I completely agree - 'over there and get ready so you aren't late'."

I glance up at Embry, "How did she know I was here?"

"She guessed, at least that's what she told me. I don't know, woman's intuition? Plus I think she knows I would have gotten your car last night if we had gone back to your house."

"Yeah, I guess," I don't like the idea that Rachel knows I stayed over at Embry's place. Even though she knows Embry has stayed the night a few times at my house, somehow being here seems like a bigger deal. Like he's letting me see a special part of him that few people ever get to see, outside of his wolf family. "So we should probably get going."

Embry leans down and kisses the top of my head, "We have a little bit of time still. I just need to take a quick shower then I can take you over to Rachel's before I go to work."

I can't help the smile as I look up at Embry, resting my chin against his chest, "Just a shower?"

"Just a shower, I promise." Embry's chest is rumbling with laughter as he leans down and kisses me, his lips moving slowly over mine, "Good morning. How did you sleep?"

"I slept-," my phone is ringing again. 

Embry growls low, his frustration evident. He rolls his eyes then grins at me, "Hold that thought." Embry places my phone to his ear and speaks, obviously irritated, "Rachel, calm down. Lillah is still waking up. I don't interrupt you and Paul first thing in the morning! She's not going to be late for school, it's fine. No one will know she stayed the night. Give us five minutes and we'll be over there, I just need to take a quick shower."

When he finishes speaking I'm surprised Rachel isn't laying into him. Normally she'd be chewing Embry out for speaking to her like that. _Not that she doesn't deserve it._ I trust that Embry won't make me late for school, he's concerned about making sure my reputation is kept clean. Too concerned in my opinion, but whatever.

Looking up at Embry, I'm shocked by what I see; Embry's face is drained of all color. He looks petrified, which scares me, since he's so strong, nothing should scare him. I start panicking when he doesn't say anything, "Embry? Em, what's wrong? Who is it?"

When Embry looks at me I can tell he's worried. My heart is pounding, I'm scared for him to tell me but also desperate to know what is going on, "Please Embry, just tell me."

"I'm so sorry, baby." Embry is whispering, covering up the phone with his enormous hands, "I- I didn't look at the caller ID. I just assumed it was Rachel."

I reach for his hands, my heart ready to pound out of my chest I'm so worried now, "Embry, let me see who it is. What's wrong?"

"It's- shit, I'm so sorry, Lillah. It's your mom."

My heart drops then starts racing double time. I'm breathing so hard I feel like I've just run a marathon. My hands are tugging on Embry's, trying to pry the phone out of his hands, "I'm so dead! Embry! Give me the damn phone," I finally tug it from his grasp, quickly placing it to my ear.

It feels like my cheeks are on fire as I slowly speak into the phone, "Mom?"

"'Damn phone'? Lillah, I did not teach you to speak like that." My heart speeds up again as panic sets in. _Oh my God. My mom knows I stayed over at Embry's place last night. Shit. Damnit all to hell. I'm so dead. _I feel like I'm fifteen and got caught sneaking out of my bedroom window. _Not that I have an experience with that type of thing._ I collapse against Embry, no longer able to keep my body sitting up as I prepare mentally to have a discussion with my mother I don't think I'm ready for. Not because I don't want to tell her about Embry, far from it, but I don't want her assuming there is more going on.

"I'm sorry, Mom. I was just- surprised," I slowly exhale as I feel Embry's hands move over me, one playing with my hair the other sliding up and down my back.

"Not as surprised as I was. I was worried about you since we haven't talked since Monday. Lillah Ayiana Hunter, what is going on over there? Did you really stay the night at some man's house? Who is he?"

"Mom, I promise you, it's ok. I just drank a little too much last night while at my friend Rachel's house. Embry brought me back here to sober up," I can feel Embry's chest rumble with laughter and I look up, warning him to keep his mouth shut. I mouth at him, "This is _your_ fault."

Embry's chest sinks and I see him mouth back, "I'm so sorry."

I nod and kiss the spot over his heart. I know he didn't mean to get me in 'trouble', and, in all honesty, as much time as we've been spending together, my mom was bound to find out sooner rather than later.

"You were drunk? On a school night? Lillah, I don't like you hanging out with these people if they are that irresponsible."

I sigh. I love my mother, and I know she and my father are just trying to protect me, but sometimes it feels like they are more worried about how things look, "Mom, I'm the one that decided to drink. I can't talk about this right now, I have to go get ready for school. I'll call you when I get home this afternoon, I promise. I love you."

"We _will_ talk when you get home from school. You can be sure of that, young lady," I haven't heard my mom call me 'young lady' in a few years, not since high school at least. Her tone of voice and her words make me feel like a kid again. _I'm so screwed._

"This afternoon, I'll talk to you later, Mom, I have to go. I love you."

"I love you, too. Goodbye, dear."

I sigh hanging up the phone. I crash into Embry, my body spent already and it's not even six thirty in the morning, "God I'm so dead."

"I'm sorry, Lillah. I'll talk to her, and your Dad, if that will help," Embry sounds so sincere and I know he didn't mean to cause any problems. This wasn't something he planned, it isn't his fault my parents over react.

I look up at him, cupping his face before brushing my lips against his, "It's okay, Em. I'm not mad at you. Right now she just wants to talk to me this afternoon, after school."

"I can miss the first part of patrols, be there when she calls, if you want," my heart does summersaults at the idea of Embry speaking to my mother. This goes beyond being a good friend, this sounds like he wants to protect me. _From my mom?_

"I should be fine, just stop by after patrols. I might have my face buried in a chocolate cake to drown my sorrows. I think my mom is going to lay it on thick this time."

"Lay what on?"

"The guilt." I sigh, looking up at him, "It will be fine. You go shower and I'll get dressed. We need to get going so we aren't both late for work."

Embry pulls me up his body, his hands on my hips, pulling me until I'm straddling his waist, his lips crush mine and I sink into him, my body needing this rush to get going again. I grin when he pulls back, "It'll be okay, I promise."

"I'm sure your mom can't stay mad at you too long. We'll make it ok, I like having you in my bed too much," this statement causes the butterflies to take flight in my stomach. "Plus, you look damn sexy in my t-shirt. I think I might need to wear that shirt today so I can smell you all day long."

Embry walks into the bathroom, giving me one last look over his shoulder before closing the door. I change back into my clothes from the day before. Instead of dwelling on what might happen this evening I decide to focus on the possibility of seeing Embry again tonight. I'm dreading having to deal with Rachel this morning and my Mom this afternoon, but the thought of another evening with Embry makes both encounters completely worth it.

My stomach grumbling spurs me to move. I grab my phone and find my way to the kitchen, not surprised by the empty counter tops. I open a few cabinets until I find Embry's cereal collection, grinning when I see all the boxes. I pull down the Lucky Charms, find a bowl and pull the milk out of the refrigerator. I grab a second bowl and place it next to the box on the counter. I hop up onto the counter beside the sink and finish my cereal. I hear Embry yelling my name from the bedroom so I call back that I'm in the kitchen.

He comes into the kitchen, frowning until he sees me. Then his face lights up, "You scared me."

"I was hungry," I lift the bowl up to show him then point at the box on the counter, "I left it out in case you wanted some. I would have made you a bowl but I didn't want it to get soggy."

"I hate soggy cereal," Embry grins, making a bowl for himself then leaning against the counter next to me, eating his gigantic bowl of cereal.

I've barely finished mine and he's done. I set the bowl in the sink, laughing when he rinses both of our dishes out, "Did you even chew?"

"I was hungry and we're in a hurry. Come on, Rachel is waiting," Embry helps me down from the counter then grabs my hand, pulling me through the apartment and out to his truck.

-0-

"Where the hell have you been? We barely have twenty minutes to get her ready."

Rachel pulls me into the house, pushing me toward what I assume is her and Paul's bedroom, "Strip down, I'll get the shower going. You can use my bath stuff, just hurry. I'll do your make-up while you fix your hair. We are going to be so late! Stupid Embry."

"Rachel, this isn't his fault."

"I know it isn't his fault, you went over there willingly, but he should have made sure you had stuff to get ready. It's his job as your-," Rachel stops herself then turns back to me, "Why did you agree to stay over knowing you didn't have anything for this morning?"

I shrug, "I trust Embry. He wouldn't let anything happen to make me look bad. He would have made sure I got home in time for work today."

Rachel shakes her head then points to the bathroom, "Just get in the shower and hurry, call me when you are done."

I quickly wash my hair, knowing that Rachel is right, we don't have much time. As soon as I'm done, I wrap one towel around my head and another around my body, stepping out into the bedroom. I quickly call out, "Rachel, I'm done."

I spot a hair dryer on the counter. I quickly let my hair fall from the towel around my head and use the hair dryer to at least get most of the moisture out of my hair. It's a mess, but I know I have a ponytail holder in my purse that I can use.

Rachel runs in as I'm just turning off the hair dryer. She has a chair in her hand and sets it down in front of the vanity, "Sit."

"Fine, but not a lot of make-up Rachel."

"Don't worry, I can't use foundation or anything on you, mine is all way too dark for you. Besides, you skin is so beautiful, I'd hate to cover it with foundation."

"It's not that beautiful."

"Well, Embry threatened to skin me alive if I even thought of covering your skin with make-up, so he must agree with me."

I look up, surprised, "He's still here?"

"Yeah, said he wouldn't leave until you do, she wants to make sure you get out of here on time." Rachel pauses then grins at me, "So, did you seduce him last night? Because even when I bit his head off earlier he seemed way less cranky than he has been."

"Rachel, we don't have time for this discussion," I close my eyes as she applies some eye shadow.

"Spoil sport. I'm going to assume you at least gave him another hand job, though you really should consider going down on him, it's amazing."

I wrinkle my nose, "I don't know Rachel."

"You aren't ready for that yet, I get it, but when you are, I'll give you some pointers so you both enjoy yourselves."

Rachel leans back, examining her work, "You're done, there's a dress on the bed, come out when you're done and we'll leave."

I pull on the purple silk dress, surprised it fits so well, then slide my feet back into my black heels I wore yesterday.

When I walk out into the living room I see Rachel, but my eyes naturally fall on Embry. The look on his face stops me in my tracks. He's not smiling, but his eyes are wide, like he's surprised. I'm suddenly shy; worried I was wrong when I thought I looked okay while walking out of the bedroom. I frown at Embry, "That bad?"

Embry looks confused, "Bad? No. You look amazing. I don't know how Rachel did it, but she managed to make you even more beautiful. I may need to stay at the school all day to keep those football players at bay."

"Embry! Not that again."

He shrugs then grins, pulling me against him, whispering, "You look amazing, that dress is perfect for you. If Rachel doesn't give it to you, I'm going to go buy one for you."

"Come on, no time for compliments, we are late," Rachel barks out from behind us.

Embry gives me a quick kiss before escorting me to my car, then opens the door and helps me in. Once I'm settled he leans in again, reaching over my lap for my right hand, "Embry, what are you doing?"

He takes my hand, pulling it close to him, before removing my friendship bracelet, which makes me frown, "Embry?"

He still doesn't say anything, but next thing I know, he's sliding the twisted up bracelet on the ring finger of my right hand. Embry kisses the makeshift ring and then lightly brushes his lips against mine, finally explaining, "We should match. Besides, you look too beautiful in that dress. If you won't let me give warnings through marking up your skin," Embry winks, "this is my next best option. Hopefully this will make those students of yours have second thoughts about drooling over you."

I want to cry. I can feel the tears forming. I try to blink them away before Embry can see, but he catches me. He smiles softly, using his thumb to wipe the few that escaped away, "These are good tears, right? I'm not in trouble am I?"

"Yes, good tears. I-," I try to compose myself, not wanting to give away how special this moment is to me. Exhaling slowly, I smile up at Embry, "I like matching, and if you have to give warning to high school students, this is a much better option." I whisper out the next part, unable to use my full voice for fear I will start crying again, "Thank you, Embry. This means a lot."

"You're welcome," Embry kisses my closed eyelids before leaning back, "I'm just glad I'm not in trouble. I'll see you later? I'll try to get off patrols early, in case you need me for dealing with your mom."

I sigh, dreading this afternoon, "I'll be fine. I promise."

"I know, but I'm the reason you're in this situation, I want to help fix it. I _will_ see you later."

I nod slowly, not wanting to go to school, but knowing I need to leave, now. I'd much rather spend all day with Embry, or even just spend the day staring at this silly little friendship ring that probably means much more to me than it should. Sighing, I take off, waving at Embry in my rear view mirror until I can't see him any longer. Even with the conversation with my mom looming over me, I have Embry to look forward to tonight. I know it shouldn't, but that thought alone will carry me through the day.

-0-  
_  
Have you talked to your mom yet?_

I smile when I see Embry's text. Seeing his face on my phone helps to calm the nerves I've felt building all afternoon. As always, his timing is perfect, I just sat down in my car after surviving one of the longest days of school I've ever had. I go ahead and start Candy, giving the car a chance to warm up while I respond.__

No, just got in my car, was going to call on my way home. Aren't you supposed to be patrolling?

I don't have to wait long for Embry's reply.

_Patrolled a little already, told Jake I'd see him later. He owes me. Let me know if you need me._

I'm tempted to respond with "I always need you", but stop myself.  
_  
I'm sure it'll be fine, go patrol. I'll tell you tonight what happened._

Embry's response is just as quick as before.  
_  
I'm ditching patrols early, Jake can cover, I'll be over there as soon as I can._

My heart skitters, but my smile is huge as I look at the friendship ring on my right hand.  
_  
Ok, but don't get in any trouble with Jake. I'll see you soon._

Once again, Embry is quick to respond.

_No trouble, soon, very soon._

I sigh, wanting to drag out the text conversation with Embry, but knowing I need to get this phone call with my mom done. I call her, putting the phone on speaker as I pull out of the school parking lot.

I don't even hear the phone ring before my mom's voice fills the Camaro, "Lillah, are you calling me while driving again?"

"Mom, I'm using the speaker phone, two hands on the wheel except for when I shift, I promise," I know my mom hates for me to drive and talk on the phone, but I need to be distracted to deal with this conversation.

But my mom will have none of it today, "Lillah, I'm going to hang up now. We'll talk when you get to the house."

Before I can say anything, my mom disconnects. This more than anything tells me I'm in pretty serious trouble. My mom never hangs up on me. She usually gives me a hard time about driving and talking on the phone, but she's never hung up on me before.

I manage to keep the tears at bay, but I grab the phone and text Embry while at the stop light.

_Come over as soon as you can. I'll be the one buried in the chocolate cake. It's bad. She just hung up on me. I'm supposed to call her back when I get home._

Embry's response comes through just as I pull into the garage.  
_  
Just let me take one quick loop around Forks and I'll be on my way. Don't call her until I get there. I want to explain to her this isn't your fault. You did nothing wrong._

I can't stop the tears this time, but I manage to type out a quick _OK_ before climbing out of the car and dragging myself into the house. All I can think about is going to my bedroom and crying my eyes out until Embry gets here. My mom has never before sounded so disappointed in me and it hurts me more than I ever thought it could. As I'm walking through the kitchen I'm looking down, not paying attention to my surroundings, but I jump a mile high and nearly scream when a voice startles me.

"Lillah! What are you wearing? I don't remember you ever buying that dress. And what is that on your finger?"

I look up to see my mom sitting at the kitchen table, her arms crossed and eyes narrowed. As she finishes her examination of me, she walks over, pulling me into a hug, "I love you, but you have a lot of explaining to do young lady."

-0- 

**A/N:** Ruh roh.

More info - Lillah's middle name: [dot]weddingvendors[dot]com/baby-names/meaning/ayiana/, Dress Rachel loaned Lillah: www[dot]farfetch[dot]com/shopping/women/search/schid-/item10041423[dot]aspx


	22. Chapter 22 Steady Your Hand

**Chapter 22 "Steady Your Hand"**

**Disclaimer:** SM doesn't live here. Just NKR & WH up in this joint! She owns the place, we are just renting it for a while!

**A/N: **We won't hold you up, Embry has quite a day ahead of him! Thanks to our amazing beta Daily_i_Candy, she rocks our socks off! Enjoy!

_Picture, you're the queen of everything  
As far as the eye can see  
Under your command  
I will be your guardian  
When all is crumbling  
To steady your hand_  
"Never Say Never" - The Fray

**EPOV **

I stop my truck in front of Paul and Rachel's house but I don't get out right away. I want to delay the confrontation with Rachel that is sure to happen, but I'm also not ready to end my time with Lillah yet. I know as soon as we enter the house, she will be rushed around and then run off to school. I'm sure she won't mind me coming over tonight, but I don't know what kind of mood she'll be in after talking with her mom later.

"Embry?" Lillah looks up at me, presumably after I've taken too long to get out of the truck.

"Yeah, I know, you need to get to school. Come on; let's go see if Rachel has calmed down at all."

After I help her out of the truck, Lillah grabs my hand, pulling me toward the house, "Come on slow poke, I'm sure she's in a fine mood now."

Before I can say anything, the front door swings wide. Rachel is standing there, hands on her hips, eyes narrowed and screaming at me, "Where the hell have you been? We barely have twenty minutes to get her ready."

Rachel pulls Lillah into the house, causing her to drop my hand. I want to pull her back, tell Rachel to back off. I know Rachel wants to help, but I don't like her just taking Lillah from me like that. I hear her call me "Stupid Embry" as she slams the bedroom door. _Fantastic._

It takes just a few minutes before I hear the shower start then Rachel walks back out into the living room, "Where's Paul?"

I try to prepare myself for the fight I'm sure Rachel is dying to have. As I expected, she comes out swinging, narrowing her eyes, "I sent him to the shop early, to cover for your sorry ass." Rachel points over her shoulder toward the closed bedroom door, "Boy you have her wrapped around your little finger, don't you? She 'claims' this wasn't your fault," Rachel rolls her eyes and uses air quotes. _Such a drama queen._

I sit down on the couch, shaking my head before responding, "This wasn't any one's fault. You were right earlier, I did screw up by not making sure she had stuff for this morning, but that was just poor planning. You also screwed up. Why didn't you make her eat last night while you were drinking?"

Rachel glares at me, "Unlike you, I don't feel the need to 'protect' Lillah and watch over her constantly. I'm sorry I didn't monitor what she ate, but she's a grown woman, Embry. I can't force food down her throat!"

"Rachel, I know she's a grown woman, but she's also been told a lot of lies about herself by that jerk of an ex of hers," I can feel my teeth grinding together and my fists clenching just thinking about him. I'm unable to stop the low growl that escapes, "I'm trying to help her understand she is perfect as she is, but I need your help. For some reason, she listens to you, almost more than she listens to me."

"She doesn't always listen to me," Rachel mumbles.

My head shoots up, worried what Rachel might have told her, "What do you mean?"

"Nothing," Rachel doesn't make eye contact with me, which makes me even more suspicious.

"Rachel, tell me, right now," I can feel my body start to shake as the worry over what Rachel might have said mixes with my own anger at myself.

Rachel shakes her head, "I don't have to tell you anything and I also don't have to keep whatever 'secret' it is that you and the rest of the wolves are keeping. However, I suspect the secret is similar to what Jacob is keeping from Ness." Rachel crosses her arms before eying me again, "Did you know Lillah thinks it's 'impossible' that you could imprint on her?"

My heart sinks. _Why would Lillah think it's impossible?_ My mind is reeling but I know I have to keep my face free of expression. Rachel will know something is up if she sees any type of emotion cross my face.

I exhale slowly when I hear Lillah call out from the bedroom that she is done in the shower. Rachel huffs, knowing her time to talk to me is up. Before she walks away I give her a warning, "Rachel, don't you dare cover that skin of hers with your dark make-up. She's beautiful just as she is."

Rachel huffs as she grabs a chair from the dining room, "Why don't you go, Embry. I can handle it from here."

"I'm not leaving until Lillah leaves. So hurry up, or you'll make all three of us late for work."

Rachel gives me one last glare as she passes by before running into the bedroom, slamming the door behind her.

-0-

Rachel steps out of the bedroom a few minutes later, a smirk on her lips, "You aren't ready."

I stand, anxious to leave as soon as Lillah walks out. Even rushing we are still cutting it close for getting her to school on time. I'm considering walking into the bedroom to grab Lillah when she walks out.

I stop breathing at the sight of her. _Perfection._ The simple purple dress fits like it was made for her. The rich color is amazing against her fair skin, her hair appearing even redder against the purple. The front dips down enough to reveal the top of her breasts, but nothing more. The skirt flairs out over her hips, showing off her curves perfectly. I assume the dress would be a little short on Rachel's taller frame, but on Lillah it stops well below mid-thigh; enough to tease me, but not too short to be inappropriate.

As I'm enjoying the view, Lillah is frowning, "That bad?"

I'm so confused by this question that I can't speak right away. _She looks lovely, how could she ever doubt it?_ I try to reassure her, "Bad? No. You look amazing. I don't know how Rachel did it, but she managed to make you even more beautiful. I may need to stay at the school all day to keep those football players at bay."

"Embry! Not that again," Lillah is huffing, clearly, still not believing me on this topic.

Needing her to understand how wonderful she looks, I pull her against me and whisper low enough so Rachel can't hear, "You look amazing, that dress is perfect for you. If Rachel doesn't give it to you, I'm going to go buy one for you."

Rachel is bitching about being late behind us. I want to ignore her, but I don't want Lillah late. _Tough call._ I kiss Lillah briefly then walk her out to her car, helping her in.

I'm still thinking about her not believing me about the football players. _She looks hot, I wonder if one of them might try to hit on her today._ This makes me want to once again mark up her neck, so they can see she's taken. _Mine._ I mentally roll my eyes at myself. I know I can't do that again, but a thought comes to my mind of another way I can indirectly show those 'kids' that she isn't available.

After Lillah gets settled in the car, I reach across her for her right hand. She asks me what I'm doing but I don't respond, needing to do this before I can speak. Once her hand is close, I pull off her friendship bracelet. I can hear her heart start beating harder and her breathing changes from even to short gasps. Knowing that she is so nervous for me to remove the bracelet makes me smile. _Maybe she's just as attached as I am._ I quickly twist the bracelet until it is a tiny replica of the 'ring' on my finger. I easily slide it onto the ring finger of her right hand. I can't stop myself from kissing the ring before moving my lips to Lillah's. I barely pull back from her lips before I attempt to explain this crazy idea to her, without giving my secrets away.

"We should match. Besides, you look too beautiful in that dress." _Complete understatement._ Beautiful is too soft of a word. Lillah looks stunning in that dress. I continue speaking, trying to cover up how much this means to me in a rush of words, "If you won't let me give warnings through marking up your skin, this is my next best option. Hopefully this will make those students of yours have second thoughts about drooling over you."

Lillah doesn't say anything but her body speaks for her. Her heart is now beating so fast I'm afraid it's going to jump out of her chest, her cheeks have turned that faint pink blush that I love so much, and her eyes are now swimming in her tears. She blinks rapidly; I assume trying to get rid of the tears before I can see. I want to frown, tell her to stop trying to hide from me, but instead I smile. I rub my thumbs under her eyes to catch the tears that escaped, but as much as I can tell about her body, I don't know what all this _means_, "These are good tears, right? I'm not in trouble am I?"

Lillah nods, "Yes, good tears. I-," her voice hitches. She looks down and exhales before looking back up at me, a radiant smile on her face and her voice more steady now, "I like matching, and if you have to give warnings to high school students, this is a much better option."

Lillah pauses, looking down at our hands, still joined as she whispers, "Thank you, Embry. This means a lot."

This simple statement by Lillah causes my heart to jump. It's been pounding away ever since this idea popped into my head. I didn't think Lillah would say no, but I wasn't sure what her reaction would be. I'm almost more nervous now because of how positive her reaction was. _Is it possible she's as attached as I am?_ I try to calm myself down by touching Lillah again, kissing her closed eyelids, speaking softer than I thought possibly given how nervous I am right now, "You're welcome."

I lean back, needing to change the subject. Relief that she liked this idea makes me realize how borderline it was; either she'd like it, or I would be in serious trouble for wanting to, indirectly, brand her as mine. I smile at Lillah, explaining a little of my relief as I prepare to separate from her for the day, "I'm just glad I'm not in trouble. I'll see you later? I'll try to get off patrols early, in case you need me for dealing with your mom."

"I'll be fine. I promise," Lillah is looking away. I know she means well, and doesn't want me to be in trouble, but I want to be there for her. Hell, I want to call her mother right now and explain, but I know Lillah needs to handle this herself. Still, I _will_ be there to support her.

"I know, but I'm the reason you're in this situation, I want to help fix it. I'll see you tonight," Lillah nods, then before I know it, she's taking off to school. She waves in the rear view mirror until she turns a corner and I can't see her any longer. Already I feel the emptiness. _I miss her._ I twist my friendship ring on my finger, reminding myself I'll see her later, as long as I get my ass to work, soon.

-0-

"Guys, come into the office for a second," I look up from the car I'm working on to see Jared and Sam walk in, heading directly toward Sam's office.

I'm guessing this is about Kim being pregnant, but I still look over at Paul, to see if he knows anything. Paul slams the hood down on the car he's working on, shaking his head, "No idea. Maybe Sam wants to chew your ass out in front of all of us."

"What the fuck did I do?" I ask as I follow him into Sam's office.

Paul elbows me as we walk in, "Well, for starters, you defiled the pool table. Took me forever to find all the _balls_. I'm guessing you knocked them off in your fun time with Lillah last night. You two probably threw it off balance. It's gonna make my game shitty."

I shrug, grinning, "You're just jealous I got there before you and Rachel. Plus, your game is always shitty."

Paul growls and speaks through clenched teeth, "You _also_ just barely made it here by seven this morning. Good thing Rachel sent me ahead to open."

I quickly glance at Sam, expecting him to chew me out. Instead he just grins, shaking his head, "Not to say I told you so, but-"

"I was here, just running a few minutes late. I blame Rachel," I glare at Paul pointedly.

Paul shrugs, "Your ass is lucky Rachel cares about Lillah."

"I don't know man, Rachel said something this morning that has me worried. I think she's trying to tell Lillah about the imprinting," Rachel's comment from this morning has been bugging me all day, that is, when I wasn't thinking about Lillah and missing her.

Paul puts his hands up, "Dude, I didn't tell her!"

"No, I know, she mentioned us keeping secrets from her. Apparently, your woman doesn't like being kept out of the loop," I frown.

Sam speaks up, saying what I've been fearing, "Emily is asking too, Embry. We'll all continue to keep this a secret for you, but it's getting harder the more Lillah becomes a part of this group. The imprintees have a special bond, they are becoming attached to Lillah just like you are. She is a part of our family now."

I don't say anything. I can feel all the guys' eyes on me, but I don't look back at any of them. I stuff my hands in my pockets, my fingers finding the ring I placed in there for safe keeping; I didn't want it to get dirty with oil and grease. I want to slip the ring back on, my finger feeling odd without it, but I don't feel like dealing with the questions right now.

The room is quiet until Jared clears his throat, "Anyway, on to happier news and the reason why Sam asked all of you in here. I just got confirmation from Kim, though I really didn't need it. She's pregnant!"

The room goes wild, everyone talking at once, congratulating Jared. As everyone calms down, Paul mumbles, "Man, I need to talk to Rachel about moving up the wedding."

Jacob, just like the rest of us, hears Paul clearly. We can all see Jacob's body begin shaking, "Why? Is my sister pregnant? Damnit, Paul, I ask one thing-!"

"She's not pregnant! Calm the fuck down, Jacob!" I move to stand between the two of them, not wanting a repeat of this argument between Jacob and Paul.

Jacob has stopped shaking, but is still glaring at Paul, "If she's not pregnant then why the hell do you need to move the wedding up?"

"Because I want to marry her. I've wanted to marry her for years but I kept letting her put it off. I know why she kept pushing out the date; she wasn't ready to start a family, she wanted to focus on her career." Paul snorts before continuing, "She blamed my age too. I mean, yeah okay, I'm younger than her but she acts like I'm a teenager.

"Anyway, with Eli here and Kim pregnant, it's time. I want her to be my wife finally and I want to start our family."

No one says anything. There has never been any doubt that Paul and Rachel love each other, though we have wondered over the years why they didn't just get married. Now it makes sense. I'm actually impressed by Paul's patience. I haven't even known Lillah two weeks and I'd give my left leg to marry her. _Marriage? Shit that's a new surprise._ Pushing _that_ thought aside, I'm humbled that Paul has waited this long for Rachel, given her the time to be a great teacher before she becomes his wife and the mother of his children. I'm not sure I would be able to wait. The image of Lillah with our little girl and pregnant with our second baby haunts me more and more each day. Now that it's official that Kim is pregnant, I want that life for Lillah and I too.

Jacob speaking grabs my attention again, "In that case, decide on a date and let's make it happen. But tell Rachel that Ness has to be a bridesmaid."

"You're serious? You aren't going to give me shit?" Paul looks honestly shocked, a rare look for him.

Jacob is shaking his head, laughing, "No more shit. You've been patient with her. I agree, it's time."

"Finally! We thought you two would never get married!" Quil is laughing, punching Paul, "Tell Rachel that Claire would look adorable as a flower girl."

Paul grins, his excitement evident, "Let me get her to agree to move it up, then you can all petition her to have your women in the wedding."

"Fantastic, now that we know Kim is pregnant and we might have a wedding soon, how about everyone get back to work?" Sam sounds gruff, but he's smiling, evidently just as happy with the news of the day as the rest of us. _It's like we're a bunch of women; talking about getting married and having babies.  
_  
As we shuffle out of the room, I catch up to Jacob, "Hey man, you got a minute?"

"Sure, what's up?" Jacob and I walk into the break room, sitting down in the hard plastic chairs.

I decide to get the easy question out first, "Is your dad around? I was thinking about going to see him over my lunch break."

"He should be. What's going on?" Jacob is grinning but I just roll my eyes.

"Nothing is going on, I just want to talk to him. I'd like to schedule a time for him to talk with Lillah," I shrug, trying to make it seem like it's not a big deal.

Jacob starts laughing, "Talk with Lillah? You're going to have my dad tell her you imprinted on her?"

"No!" I practically shout my response, angered that Jacob could even think I'd want Billy to tell her.

Jacob smirks, "Well damn. So what do you want my dad to talk to Lillah about?"

"The day Lillah came to the Rez-," I start, but Jacob interrupts me.

"You mean the day you imprinted. Man, you have to tell her soon," Jacob is eying me, but I ignore him.

"I'm not going to tell her, Jacob, she doesn't love me, she doesn't want this life. So just stop," I'm getting frustrated, mostly because Jacob is sounding like the annoying voice in my head.

Jacob rolls his eyes, "She loves your stubborn ass, but whatever. So the day you imprinted?"

I shake my head and continue explaining, "The day Lillah came to the Rez, she was planning to visit Billy, to talk about the legends of our tribe. She wants to bring her class out here. But obviously, she never got a chance to talk to him. I'm thinking about having him come over to her place for dinner on Friday. Maybe, surprise her."

"If you hadn't distracted her during the bonfire, maybe she'd already know the stories," Jacob wiggles his eyebrows at me. It takes everything in me not to punch him.

"Shut up. You'll understand soon enough when Ness-."

Jacob lifts his hand to stop me, "I understand, I'm just giving you shit. I'm sure Dad would love to come for dinner. Since this isn't formal, I don't see any reason why the rest of the council should join, unless you want Sue, Old Quil, Sam and I there."

"No definitely not formal. You guys don't need to join, besides, everyone will get their time with Lillah on Saturday," I frown, thinking about the family dinner. "I hope everyone behaves."

"I don't think the imprintees will say anything to Lillah directly, Embry, but if you'd like, I can talk to Rachel," Jacob offers.

I'm tempted to agree, but I know Rachel, "No, don't talk to her, if you do she'll know something is up. I'm hoping if we just don't mention it, she'll drop it."

"I doubt that. So what happened to cause Rachel to be so pissed at you? Why were you almost late this morning?"

I forget that Jacob doesn't know everything that has happened so far today. I explain what happened last night after he left, keeping out the more personal details, then tell him about this morning, including answering the phone and it being Lillah's mom.

Jacob looks at me sympathetically, "Shit! I can't imagine what Bella would do if I answered Ness' phone in the morning;probably rip my head off."

"Yeah, which brings me to my second question. Lillah is supposed to talk to her mom this afternoon after school, would you mind...?" I trail off, not sure exactly what's going to happen this afternoon, but knowing I need to be there with Lillah.

Jacob shakes his head, seeming to know without me asking, "Of course not, I should be around to cover, just do a quick lap around the Rez if you can. Go be with her, this is going to get ugly if her mom is anything like Bella."

"I'm pretty sure her mom isn't a vampire," I smirk at the thought.

Jacob shakes his head as we walk back out to the shop, "You've obviously never seen a mother in full protection mode, she doesn't need to be a vampire to rip your throat out. Imagine Emily if anything were ever to happen to Claire or Eli."

I shudder at the thought, knowing Emily would attack, no questions asked, "Shit. I'm screwed."

"You are, and you still haven't even screwed her. Dumbass," Jacob punches my shoulder, laughing as he walks away. I really want to kick some wolf ass for the repeated name calling, especially Jacob and Paul. Instead, I bury myself in my work, trying to ignore my now anxious mood.

-0-

Billy opens the door as I'm just lifting my hand to knock, "Come on in, Embry."

"How did you know?" I follow Billy into the kitchen, surprised to see he has food set out on the table, along with two plates.

Billy rolls to his spot and waves for me to sit, "Jacob called me, told me you'd be coming over. Hope you don't mind cold fried chicken."

"Sounds good, you want anything to drink?" I grab a soda from the fridge. I've been at the Black's house so much over the years that Billy would be offended if I didn't make myself at home.

"Nah, I'm good with my water." I take a seat and grab some food while Billy speaks, "How have you been? You and Lillah seemed much happier on Saturday at the bonfire than the previous week. Have you told her yet?"

"I'm good, I guess," I chew on my food as I consider what to say to Billy. "I haven't told her but it's getting harder to keep it a secret. Especially with the other imprintees wanting to know if she's a part of their little group."

Billy frowns slightly, "It won't get easier keeping this a secret. Like I said the day you imprinted, she is a part of this tribe now. Just as she is a perfect fit for you, it would make sense that she fits in with the other women of the tribe."

"But she's so different from them. I don't understand how they can so readily accept her as part of their group, even without knowing I imprinted," I'm frustrated, especially since I'm no longer just fighting telling Lillah the truth. The imprintees are going to make this difficult on me, I can tell, _especially Rachel_.

Billy chuckles, then smiles up at me, "Different isn't bad, it's just different. The women have embraced Lillah as part of them, accepting her as she is. She is a lovely and caring woman, we are lucky to have her added into our family."

"Yeah, I suppose," I grab another piece of chicken, considering all the differences between Lillah and the other imprintees.

Billy grins, "Think about it this way, Embry. Now that you've gotten to know her a little better, is Lillah the same person you assumed she was on that first day?"

I think back to that Saturday, trying to remember how I saw Lillah then. I hated her, she was going to ruin me. All I saw was a rich woman that had been given everything in life.

I sit back in my chair, closing my eyes as I'm reminded of my actions on that day._ I was terrible to Lillah, she didn't do anything to deserve how I treated her. What's worse, I was wrong on all of my assumptions of her. She didn't want to ruin my life, hell, I feel like I'm the one hell bent on ruining her life, especially after this morning. Her parents might be rich, but I know Lillah lives a much simpler life. She is smart and educated, but she is far from spoiled. Lillah is sweet, innocent, and loving. She can't even be mean to an ex-boyfriend that deserves an ass beating._

"I really screwed up, Billy."

Billy laughs at my admission, "Yes, you did. But," he glances at the friendship ring on my finger, "it looks like you are slowly making up for those early mistakes. This looks like a new addition to your hand." As soon as I washed my hands at the shop, I slipped it back on. I feel incomplete without her ring on now. I don't want to go into details so I just smile at Billy, helping him to clear the table.

"Very well, I won't press," Billy smiles back at me. I've forgotten how helpful it can be to talk to Billy. He somehow manages to always put me in my place, without being mean or even direct. _He really is like the dad I never had.  
_  
"Now that we have all of that out of the way, why did you want to speak with me today? Not that I mind having you visit me for lunch," Billy chuckles.

I follow Billy into the living room, sitting down on the couch, grinning back at him, "Thanks for lunch, Billy. I actually wanted to talk to you about why Lillah was here originally."

"You mean on the day you imprinted?"

I roll my eyes, laughing at the similarity between Jacob and Billy, "Yes, that day. Lillah was coming to see you, right?"

"That's right, she wanted to learn some of the legends, see if they would fit into her curriculum." Billy is looking at me, like he's puzzled by my question, "Why?"

"Well, Lillah loves history, that's the subject she teaches. I know with everything that happened that day, she didn't really get to talk to you one-on-one. I'd like to see about rescheduling, make it a surprise for her," I do a little mental finger crossing, hoping Billy will be willing to agree.

It doesn't take long for Billy to respond, "That sounds like a great idea, Embry! When would be a good time?"

"How about Friday, say six-thirty? That way I can finish up patrols and clean up before you get there. I'll cook so you and Lillah can have some time to talk, then you can join us for dinner. Like I said, I'd like for it to be a surprise, she's going to be so excited," I'm already smiling thinking about Lillah's reaction to this plan. She just loves history, so I know hearing our legends will be a thrill for her.

"Works for me," Billy shakes my hand, grinning. "I'm looking forward to getting to know her better. Too bad she was so distracted at the bonfire, she would have really enjoyed hearing a few of those stories."

I grimace, hating that Billy knows we weren't paying attention, "Billy, I'm sorry-." I do feel guilty about that. I know better than to be disrespectful in that way.

Just like his son, he cuts me off, waving his hands, "It's ok, Embry. I'm not mad. Trust me, I've seen it happen before. There will be plenty of other bonfires for her to hear the stories, but you two needed to get to know one another better that night. I can tell it's had a positive effect for both of you. That's all I can ask for."

I still feel guilty, but don't say anything. I check my watch, standing as I notice the time, "Sorry to cut this short, Billy, but I need to get going. I have to finish an oil change before patrols."

"Don't worry, Embry, I understand. I'll see you on Friday," Billy again shakes my hand. I smile, shaking his back before leaving. I'm in a rush to get back to work now, knowing that in just a few short hours Lillah will be out of school. It's almost time for her to speak with her mother and I'm anxious to get to her as quickly as I can.

-0-

As soon as Paul walks in the shop I run to my truck, driving home as quickly as possible. Once I get to my place, I stop the truck and run to the woods. I know Lillah isn't out of school yet, so I'm going to patrol around the Rez until school is over.

Things are quiet, even when Jacob joins me a few minutes later. He leaves me alone for the most part, but I'm so worried about this phone call that Jacob orders me to phase and check on her. _Guess I'm getting on his nerves. Oh well._

I run through the forest, crossing into Forks before I phase back. I pull out my phone and start pacing as soon as I hit the "send" button on my text to Lillah.

_Have you talked to your mom yet?_

I stop my pacing when my phone dings a few moments later with her response.

_No, just got in my car, was going to call on my way home. Aren't you supposed to be patrolling?_

I bark out a laugh, shaking my head at her response. _Why is she worrying about me?_ The wrath of Jake is nothing compared to Lillah's mom. I type out a quick answer then hit 'send' again, returning to my pacing.

_Patrolled a little already, told Jake I'd see him later. He owes me. Let me know if you need me._

I stop again a few seconds later, my phone not even getting the chance to go dark before her response pops up.  
_  
I'm sure it'll be fine, go patrol. I'll tell you tonight what happened._

I growl low, frustrated that she keeps fighting me on this. I consider calling her to explain, bet decide to be blunt. No questions asked, I will be there to support her.  
_  
I'm ditching patrols early, Jake can cover, I'll be over there as soon as I can._

I'm nervous to see her response, so I keep pushing buttons on my phone so it doesn't go dark. It only takes a few minutes for her to respond, but it feels like a lifetime.  
_  
Ok, but don't get in any trouble with Jake. I'll see you soon._

It's not until I exhale that I notice I was holding my breath waiting for her. I type out a quick reply then phase.

_No trouble, soon, very soon._

I'm almost back to La Push, agreeing with Jacob to do a quick lap before going to Lillah's when I feel my phone go off. I phase back, grabbing my phone from the pouch. I click on the message and nearly drop the phone when I see what she's written.

_Come over as soon as you can. I'll be the one buried in the chocolate cake. It's bad. She just hung up on me. I'm supposed to call her back when I get home._

I type out a response then phase to explain everything to Jacob.  
_  
Just let me take one quick loop around Forks and I'll be on my way. Don't call her until I get there. I want to explain to her this isn't your fault. You did nothing wrong._

I want to run directly to her house, but I need to make sure everything is clear in Forks before I go to her. Jacob agrees to patrol La Push while I do a quick sweep of Forks. I circle the outside of the town then aim for Lillah's house. I stop only to pull on my boxers and jeans then grab the hide-a-key and let myself in. I softly call Lillah's name, expecting to find her in her bedroom, curled up and crying.

I walk through the living room, making sure I'm as quiet as possible in case Angela is here. I'm about to step into the hallway, when Lillah comes around the corner from her bedroom. She's still wearing the beautiful purple dress, but I can see she's been crying, her eyes red behind her glasses. Lillah gasps when she sees me and starts pushing me into the living room, looking over her shoulder toward the kitchen. _I guess Angela is home._

I stop when my legs hit the edge of the couch, sitting down on the arm and pulling her into me. Even when we are sitting, her head tucks easily under my chin. Lillah's arms wrap around my chest, her fingers dancing over the muscles of my back. Her breathing is choppy but it starts to even out the longer I hold her. I find myself rocking her slightly as I try to reassure her that everything will be ok. My fingers tangle in her hair, massaging her scalp then moving to her neck and shoulders.

I whisper against her ear, "Are you ok?"

I can feel Lillah's head nod under my chin, then she pulls back, looking at me, "I'm ok, but Embry-."

"Have you called her yet?" My hands slide lower down her back. I can feel her heart rate increase as my fingers grip her hips.

Lillah bites her lip, closing her eyes but I can hear the little moan she's trying not to let escape. Lillah shakes her head "no", then her eyes pop open again, "Embry, I need to tell you-."

I move one hand back to her face, my finger over her lips to silence her, "Lillah, whatever it is, we'll figure it out, I promise."

"No, Embry, you don't- ohhhh," my other hand has moved to her ass, pulling her forward until her stomach is against my always present erection. Lillah's reaction is immediate; her nails dig into my back and her eyes close. It's like she's trying to stop herself, but I don't know why. Angela has seen us kissing before, it's not a big deal.

I pull Lillah's face to mine, kissing her slowly, trying to help her relax. I speak in between passes of my lips against hers, "It's ok, baby. I'm here now. Relax, we'll take care of everything."

Lillah leans into my lips, moaning softly before speaking, "I know, Embry, it's just-."

"Shhh, it'll be fine. I promise," I pull her lips to mine, increasing the pressure of our kiss, needing to show her I'll take care of her in all ways, even protecting her from her mother.

Lillah is hesitant, keeping her mouth closed and not moving her hands, which surprises me. She hasn't reacted to my kisses like this in a while, not since our first few kisses. But as I hold her tight against me I can feel her start to relax. Her hands move from my back to my hair, tugging gently, causing me to moan against her lips. Lillah finally opens her mouth to me and I easily slide my tongue against hers as my hand against her ass squeezes gently.

Lillah sighs, melting against me. I move my hands to cup the outside of her thighs, helping her to remain standing. Of course, my long fingers wrap around the inside of her thighs, so I can easily feel the heat coming from her center.

I'm about to move my hands to slide under her dress when I hear a gasp that doesn't come from Lillah.

"What the hell are you doing Lillah? Who is this man? Why are you two practically having sex in the living room?"

I immediately pull back from Lillah, standing from the sofa as quickly as possible while also moving her to stand behind me. What I see in front of me almost knocks me over; it's Lillah, only older, taller and _much_ angrier. The woman stares back at me, watching my every move as I make sure Lillah is safe behind me. She then turns, aiming toward the kitchen as she speaks, obviously still upset at catching us, "Straighten yourselves up and get in the kitchen, now."

When the woman is out of sight, I turn to Lillah, who sinks down onto the arm of the couch, resting her forehead against my chest. I can just barely hear her when she whispers, "Embry, that was my mom. She decided it would be best to have our _conversation_ in person."

I'm grinding my teeth to keep from speaking my mind. _Shit. Fuck. Damnit. I want to run into the kitchen and tell her mother to back off,_ I'm _protecting Lillah now._ But I can't. Instead I nod, whispering against Lillah's ear, "Ok. We can do this. I'm right here with you. Remember, you are an adult, we haven't done anything wrong."

Lillah shakes her head slightly then stands slowly before turning to walk into the kitchen to face her mom. I'm impressed by how straight Lillah's back is as she walks, like she is ready to do battle with her mom. I follow her into the kitchen, stopping next to her when we enter. I want to grab her hand, even tuck her behind me again to protect her, but I know I shouldn't. This is something Lillah wants to handle herself; against my better judgment, I give her the opportunity, for now.

I face Lillah's mother head on, meeting her curious and cautious gaze. Lillah's mother is clutching a cup of coffee between her hands and she's glaring at me. I see where Lillah gets her beautiful grey eyes and fiery golden hair. _And her temper too._ Lillah's mother looks furious, rightfully so, seeing as she thinks I've defiled her baby girl. I feel Lillah slip her hand into mine and I glance at her, returning the shy smile she gives me. I hear a gasp and turn my head back to Lillah's mother. She's eying our connected hands with a look of surprise.

"Embry, this is my mom, Carolyn Hunter. Mom, this is my f-friend, Embry Call."

Lillah tugs my hand, moving us to sit down at the kitchen table as her mother speaks, "Embry. So you're the one that kept my daughter out last night and got her drunk?"

I clear my throat and look into Mrs. Hunter's eyes, determined to reassure her that I would never allow anything bad to happen to her daughter. I'm sure that through her eyes, I must seem less than worthy of having any kind of relationship with Lillah, but oddly enough, I hope to prove her wrong. _Lillah means everything to me, not just as my imprintee, but as a friend. I would do anything for her._

"Mom!" Lillah gasps next to me and I squeeze her hand gently, letting her know its ok.

"Mrs. Hunter, I promise you, I wouldn't have let Lillah miss work. I know how important her job is to her, how much her students depend on her. I respect her too much to have let that happen."

"Mom," Lillah starts again before I can stop her, "You should know- Embry wasn't the reason I was drinking. He was with his friends and I was with mine; we were having a girl's night. After everyone went home I had one of the girls take me to meet Embry and he drove me to his place."

"He couldn't have driven you _home_, instead of to his place?" Mrs. Hunter asks with exasperation.

"Yes ma'am, I could have. I _should_ have. It was just so late and Lillah was exhausted. I knew she needed the rest and I didn't want her to lose any more sleep than she already had. I took her to my place, Mrs. Hunter, fed her and then we crashed," I leave out the other bits of information, figuring the less she knows, the better things will go for Lillah. My main goal is to guard her, no matter the cost to me.

Mrs. Hunter doesn't pull her gaze away from mine, she just stares into my eyes. I feel like she's searching for something, or trying to see into me, to read my feelings for Lillah. _I hope that she doesn't see too much because I don't know how I could explain to her that her daughter is my entire world. That even though I can't admit it out loud, she's my reason for existing and I'll never be the same again._

Lillah breaks the silence in the room, "Mom. Embry is my friend. He didn't do anything wrong last night. In fact, he took care of me and made sure I wouldn't get sick this morning."

Mrs. Hunter's eyes move from me to Lillah. I inch my chair closer to Lillah's, trying to make sure she is ok, protect her as much as I can without being completely obvious about it. As I move closer, I wrap Lillah's hand that has the friendship ring on it in both of mine. This movement catches Mrs. Hunter's eyes and she narrows them again before looking back at Lillah.

"What I just saw did not look like friendship. Friends don't share a bed and answer one another's phones in the morning."

"Mom, it's not like that-," Lillah's mom lifts her hand, cutting Lillah off.

"Are you using my daughter for sex?" Mrs. Hunter is glaring at me so hard, I'm pretty sure she'd destroy me with her eyes if she could.

"I'm definitely not using Lillah for sex, we haven't had sex, Mrs. Hunter," I'm suddenly very glad I can say that truthfully.

Mrs. Hunter scoffs, turning to Lillah, "I find that hard to believe after what I just saw. Lillah, tell me truth, are you sleeping with him?"

Lillah moves her other hand to cover mine, looking her mother straight in the eyes, "His name is Embry, Mom. Embry let me sleep in his bed last night, but we just slept. We aren't sleeping together," Lillah turns her head to look at me and I smile at her, trying my best to reassure her and give her strength. Lillah tilts her head down, smiling back at me before she looks at her mom, "Mom, even if we were sleeping together, it's none of your business. I'm an adult. It's- it's not your job any more to protect me, and you should have taken his word; he's an honorable man, Mom."

Mrs. Hunter is silent for a few moments. She shakes her head slightly then looks at Lillah again, a sad smile evident on her face. When she speaks, she is softer now, no longer the overprotective mother, now the loving mother, but the worry is still there in her voice. "Lillah, you are barely twenty-one, I hardly consider that an adult-."

"Mom," for the first time in the conversation, Lillah interrupts Mrs. Hunter, but her tone is still soft, reasonable, "you were twenty-one when you married Daddy. I'll be twenty-two at the end of this month, and that's how old you were when you had me."

"Lillah, it was different then, your father and I were in love," Mrs. Hunter starts to wave her hand dismissively, then stops, her eyes darting between Lillah and me.

Lillah looks at me for a brief second when her mom mentions love, her cheeks pink and her eyes wide. It takes everything in me to stop myself from jumping up and shouting at Mrs. Hunter, but I don't know what I would tell her. It's not like I could tell her I love her daughter. _Liar. You are _so_ in love with Lillah._ That annoying voice in my head laughs at me. I shake my head, trying to deny the truth, needing to focus on Lillah and this conversation right now.

"Mom, I'm not talking about getting married or having kids, but you and Daddy were adult enough at my age to get married. Like I said, I am an adult and," Lillah exhales, sitting up a little straighter at this statement, "it's none of your business." I'm impressed by Lillah's ability to say this kindly. Thinking back over arguments with my own mom, I was never able to stay this calm, speak this rationally, whether Mrs. Hunter wants to admit it or not, Lillah truly is an adult.

Mrs. Hunter's voice isn't cold when she speaks, but her words still cut even me slightly, "It's my business when your reputation is at stake."

The room goes silent. Just as I'm about to say something, Lillah jumps in, "Mom, my reputation is fine. I appreciate you caring, but I can take care of myself."

"Mrs. Hunter," Lillah and Mrs. Hunter's heads jerk around when I speak up. It makes me smile, inside of course, to see the similarity in these two women. But the differences are obvious to me as well. Lillah's beauty is more natural, simple, where her mother is more regal, made up. I can't ever see Lillah wanting a diamond necklace like Mrs. Hunter is wearing. I finger the simple friendship ring on Lillah's hand and she smiles at me, encouraging me to continue, "Believe me, I want to protect Lillah and her reputation as much as you do. She is my friend and I would do anything for her. I should have brought her home last night, but my first concern was to take care of her. I would never knowingly put Lillah in a situation where she could be thought of as anything less than the wonderful person you raised her to be."

Lillah turns slightly in her chair, her smile much wider now but there are tears sparkling in her eyes again. I whisper as low as I can for just Lillah, "Good tears?" She lowers her head, giving a slight nod. She wipes at the tears quickly before grabbing my hand with the friendship ring on it, tugging it to rest on the table, then covers it with her right hand.

Lillah turns to face her mom again, speaking low at first, explaining 'us' as best she can to her mom, "Mom, you asked me earlier about my ring. As you can see, Embry is wearing one too. We are friends, Mom, and that's what these rings represent. Neither Embry nor I did anything wrong last night." I twist my hand on the table to intertwine our fingers, Lillah's voice getting stronger as she speaks, "I appreciate you coming here and I love seeing you, but I promise you, I'm ok. My reputation is also ok. Now," Lillah smiles at me before continuing, "are you hungry?"

Mrs. Hunter exhales, relaxing slightly, "I'm still not happy about this, and based on what I saw earlier there is more than 'just' friendship going on here, but fine, we will table this for now. I am hungry. Lillah would you like to go somewhere for dinner? My treat?"

Lillah glances back at me. I don't want to leave her, but I know her and her mom need time to talk without me around. I shrug, indicating I don't mind if she goes, but Lillah shakes her head, turning back to her mom, "I'd rather stay home, Mom. Embry can join us for dinner, you can get to know him better. Why don't you go freshen up while I cook? How does a chicken broccoli casserole sound?"

"Lillah, you don't have to cook, Embry can join us if you insist," Mrs. Hunter glances at me.

"Mom, I like cooking. Embry, why don't you carry my mom's bag upstairs while I get started. Mom, be nice to Embry," Lillah points her finger at her mom before standing from the table.

Mrs. Hunter also stands, pulling Lillah close for a tight hug. I can just barely hear what she whispers to Lillah, "I love you so much, Lillah. I just want the best for you. Is he why you've been so happy lately?"

I know Lillah knows I can hear her mom, so I stand, grabbing the bag, giving Lillah and her mom some privacy. I easily take the stairs two at a time, pausing when I realize this is the first time I've been up here. There are four doors, one of which is closed. I assume that is Angela's room. The door across from the closed door is a bathroom; it has simple colors and is basic, but much bigger than I would have expected. On the other side of the stairs are two bedrooms. Both rooms are small, one has a full size bed in it, which is where I'm assuming Mrs. Hunter will stay, the other a twin bed. I set the bag down in the room with the full size bed then move over to the other bedroom. The walls are a soft pink, definitely a little girl's room, with multi-colored pastel butterflies all over the room, including on the bed spread. My heart starts pounding when I imagine that beautiful little girl from my daydream playing in this room, _our daughter_.

"Isn't this a cute little room?" I nearly jump when I hear Mrs. Hunter's voice behind me. I nod, still too choked up over the images in my mind to say anything.

"This is the only room Lillah refused to let me redecorate. Her grandmother decorated this room for her when we moved away, said it was Lillah's room for whenever she wanted to visit. I could have made this a lovely office for her, but she didn't want that."

I shake my head, understanding immediately why Lillah wouldn't want this room changed, whispering what is so obvious to me, "No, she wouldn't, this house and this room is her connection to her grandmother. She misses her, this is where she feels closest."

"Tell me Embry, how is it," I make myself turn from the room to face Mrs. Hunter, "someone Lillah has never mentioned to me or her father knows her so well as to know why she would keep _this_ room as it is?"

I shrug, walking to the top of the stairs before pausing, "I can't explain it Mrs. Hunter, but please know, I only want the best for your daughter."

She frowns at me, "And you think you're the best for her?"

"No, I know she deserves so much better than me," I sigh, walking downstairs, but I have to smile when I hear Mrs. Hunter's parting shot.

"It might help your case if you'd put a shirt on."

-0-

As soon as I step into the kitchen, Lillah launches herself at me. I hold her close, wishing I could just hold her like this for the remainder of the evening. I lift her in my arms and carry her over to the table, sitting down in a chair before placing her on my lap. I'm still working through watching Lillah stand up to her mom. She was so strong and beautiful, defending not only herself but also me. I whisper against her hair, "How did I get so lucky to have a friend like you?"

Lillah's head jerks back and she eyes me, "Embry, you're wrong, I'm the lucky one. I don't know of any other man, friend or otherwise, that would have been right by my side for this. You could have left when she found us."

"Why would I leave, baby? I'm here for you. We are in this together. And you were amazing standing up to your mom. I would have never been that calm."

Lillah's hands cup my cheeks, kissing my forehead, my nose, my chin, and then briefly, my lips, "Embry, you being here, beside me, was amazing. You- you're the reason I was so calm. You supporting me was more than I could have ever hoped for. Thank you."

"That's what friends are for, right?" Even as I say this the voice in my head is screaming. _You didn't do this because she's your friend, you were there for her because you love her._

Lillah pulls back slightly, nodding, but her smile has faded a bit, "Right, that's what friends do, support one another. Including supporting in cooking dinner. Put on your shirt and help me."

Hearing Lillah's words makes me chuckle, "You know, you and your mom are very similar, not just in looks."

Lillah looks confused as she slides off my lap, "Are you saying I look like my mom? Thanks, I think, but I really wish I had her build, she's so much taller and leaner than I am."

"I've told you before I like you just as you are, you are beautiful, all petite and _curvy_." I tug my shirt on and follow her to the stove, wrapping my arms around her as I drop a kiss on her neck, "I like this curve right here, I could let my tongue do laps here all day." I move one hand to the side of her breast, "This curve right here distracts me all the time." The hand I still have around her waist slides over to her hip, my fingers brushing across her stomach, "When I get here, this curve sends me spinning, because I'm so close to where I want to be." I glide the hand that was at her breast slowly down her side, over her hip and let my fingers dance across her thigh, "But this curve is the sweetest, when I get here, this is when you are the most beautiful; when you are screaming my name, begging me for more."

I can feel Lillah trembling against my hands, trying to stay in control. I won't start anything right now, but I need her to know just how much she drives me crazy with her gorgeous body.

"Embry," Lillah's whisper sounds more like a moan, which makes me smile, "my mom- can't."

I move my hands back to her hips reluctantly, but continue to drop kisses on her neck, "I know baby, your mom is here. Just remember, you are more beautiful than your mother, at least in my eyes. She can't hold a candle to you. Now let's get to cooking."

Lillah and I work on the meal just like we have previously. Her mom walks in a few moments later, smiling. Lillah and her mom catch up as we finish making dinner. Mrs. Hunter asks me about my life. I'm surprised when Lillah jumps in to add more details to what I consider a pretty simple story, especially since I can't mention anything about the "wolf" part of me.

After dinner, I offer to clean while both women move to the living room to relax. Once the dishes are done, I turn off the kitchen light, knowing I need to leave. I stop by the living room to say good night. Mrs. Hunter seems pleasant enough as she smiles at me and tells me to have a good evening. As I turn to leave I hear Lillah whisper, "I'll be right back, Mom."

I pause at the door, waiting for her to round the corner. It takes just a few seconds before Lillah has wrapped her arms around me, "You don't have to leave, Embry."

"I know baby, but you and your mom should catch up. I'll see you tomorrow, I promise."

Lillah sighs against my chest as I reflect on this crazy day. Recalling the conversation with her mom I grin before asking, "Lills, when is your birthday? You said it's this month earlier."

"The thirty-first. I'm a spook," Lillah grins up at me. "Good thing I love Halloween."

Chuckling low, I kiss the top of her head, "That is a good thing. I love Halloween too, lots of candy. Now the question is, what should I get your for your birthday?"

"Oh, Embry, you don't have to get me anything," her eyes are wide with worry.

I brush the pad of my thumb over her pouting lips, "Of course I'm going to get you something. I'm glad I have time to plan now, I can find you the perfect gift."

Lillah speaks softly, barely above a whisper, "I'm sure anything you get me will be perfect, Embry."

"Good, now that that's settled," sliding my hands over her checks I tangle my fingers in her hair, massaging her scalp gently. When I can feel the tension leaving her body I speak again, "How long is your mom staying?" I'm hoping not through the weekend, I'd hate to have to reschedule with Billy.

"Just tonight, she is driving home tomorrow morning. Hopefully she won't tell Daddy too much, I really don't want him coming down here," Lillah's body shivers slightly in my arms, which makes me worry. _I hope she isn't so embarrassed by me that she would dread telling her father._

"Ok," I'm hesitant before I ask the next question, "how about I try to come back later, after she's asleep?"

Lillah smiles and lifts herself onto her tiptoes, kissing me, "Yes, please, just use the hide-a-key."

I nod, kissing her briefly before turning and leaving through the front door. Of course, I loop back around the house to the back, quickly shedding my clothes before I phase. Quil is laughing like a hyena as I replay the day in my head. I don't have the energy to even tell him to stop, so I just ignore him.

I return to my place, take a quick shower, making sure to relieve myself as is now my ritual. I pull on sweats then go back to the forest, deciding to patrol for a little while with Quil before returning to Lillah's house. I find myself unable to stay away from the woods around Lillah's house as I patrol. When I see Lillah walk out onto the back porch and start pacing my heart jumps into my throat. I know she can't see me, but I can't take my eyes off of her as I see her looking out into the woods. I can tell even from a distance that she is nervous. I want to run to her but just as I decide I can't take it any longer and I need to go to her, she practically runs back into the house when her mom calls her name. Quil, of course, sees all of this happen through our mind link and it starts a new wave of laughter from him.

-0-

A few hours later I use the hide-a-key to let myself in through the back door. I pause a second to let my eyes adjust to the dark, then slip through the living room, knowing my way through Lillah's house. I feel so comfortable in this house, which is strange but right at the same time. Clearing my thoughts, I focus on not making any noise. As I walk through the living room in what I hope is a stealth manner, I pray that Mrs. Hunter doesn't pop up out of nowhere and demand to know why I'm sneaking into her daughter's house.

I find Lillah's bedroom door closed. I cross my fingers it's not locked before placing my hand on the doorknob, silently sighing in relief when the knob turns. I quietly slip into the room and shut the door behind me. I have enough sense about myself to lock it before walking around the foot of Lillah's bed.

There is just enough light from her alarm clock, the bathroom nightlight, and the moon for me to see her clearly, I stop to watch her and I smile. She's laying on her stomach, her hair all spun gold and wild around her. She has one arm stretched out across the other side of the bed, reaching. Her hand is flipped, palm side up in a weird position. She's making little sounds in her sleep, almost whimpers, which I've never noticed before.

I move to the empty side of the bed, _my side of the bed_, and lift the blankets. I run my fingers across the back of Lillah's arm, tickling the skin so that she jerks it back in her sleep. I know she was exhausted after the day she had but I'd hoped to be able to come over before she was completely out. Unfortunately, as I was pacing the tree line waiting to come in, I could tell it was taking her mother longer to get settled than I expected. I didn't want to chance her mother finding me sneaking in, but I needed to get back to Lillah. As much as I hate to admit it to myself, not sleeping next to her is no longer an option._ I don't like being separated from her, especially at night. _

I pull my sweat pants off, leaving my boxers on and climb into the bed, gently rolling Lillah over until she's facing me. I place a hand on her cheek and brush her hair gently out of her face and she sighs. When I move my hand down her arm, to her hip to pull her closer to me she mutters my name. This is the only place in the world I want to be; right here next to her, her soft body yielding to mine. I place a kiss on each of her eye lids, her forehead, the tip of her nose and then her sweet lips. She tucks her face into the crook of my neck and I wrap my arm around her, rubbing my hand up and down her back.

As I fall asleep I'm aware of two things. First, Lillah has stopped whimpering. She has wrapped herself around me in her sleep and is now completely out. Second, it takes no time at all for me to fall asleep as soon as I have her in my arms. I know, just like every other night I've shared a bed with Lillah, this will again be one of the best nights of sleep I've ever had.

-0-

**A/N:** There was lots in this one! Long day for our boy. Anyone wonder why Lillah was on the back porch after Embry left? Don't worry, that answer is coming next week! Don't forget to hit that little review button! We love to hear your thoughts, comments, feedback, love, adoration, bitching, whatever!

The dress Rachel loaned Lillah: http:/www[dot]farfetch[dot]com/shopping/women/search/schid-/item10041423[dot]aspx#


	23. Chapter 23 Best of His Kind

**Chapter 23 "Best Of His Kind"**

**Disclaimer: **Still not SM. In the words of EclipseMovie!Jacob, "Well Damn."

**A/N: **This is a LONG one (TWSS). Around 11,000 words. Smut warning for those reading at work. Enjoy! Check out our blog at stupidleeches[dot]com/2010/09/sequels-poll/ and leave a comment on the blog entry titled "Sequel Poll" to let us know what other pairings you'd like to see us write. We are feeling a little inspired after seeing Eclipse again over the weekend. Lots of little giggly moments in coming chapters because of it.

_He's a real live wire  
He's the best of his kind  
Wait till you see those eyes  
He dresses like this different scene  
He'll kiss you make you feel sixteen  
What's it even mean?_  
"Are You Here" - Corinne Bailey Rae

**LPOV**

I reluctantly follow my mom into the living room, giving Embry one last glance over my shoulder. He smiles sweetly and my heart squeezes a little tighter. As I drag myself into the living room, I think about on how wonderful Embry has been today.

I know it was an accident when he answered the phone this morning. He didn't want to cause a conflict with my mom, but even then he was apologizing, telling me he would help me straighten things out. Then this afternoon, when she hung up on me, he rushed over here as soon as he could, skipping patrols to be with _me_. I thought for sure when my mom caught us he would bail, _Carter would have bailed_. No, Carter wouldn't have been there for me in the first place, but Embry, he not only supported me, he stood next to me, giving me the courage to stand up to my mom.

On top of all of that, Embry stuck around this evening, had dinner with my mom and me, and was his wonderful charming self with her. He answered all of Mom's questions and asked her a few in return; I think I even saw her blush at one point. When Embry downplayed himself, just briefly saying he works at the shop, I was shocked. Of course, I would never tell Mom about the "wolf" thing, but Embry does so much more for the tribe, I couldn't let him just overlook that important part of his life. When I jumped in, Embry gave me a weird look, and then grinned, so I figured I was ok.

It was a little embarrassing when Embry started telling her about what I've had going on. Of course, I've told her about Rachel, Kim, and Emily, but it was weird for him to tell Mom how much they like having me around. He also told her about the dinner coming up on Saturday night, how everyone is excited to get to know me better. This discussion brought about my own round of blushing.

"Tell me about this dress, Lillah. You look lovely in it," I look up, only realizing we've reached the living room when I hear Mom's voice.

I sit down on the couch next to her, feeling like I can relax a little now. It's nice not having to keep Embry a secret anymore. I still can't define our relationship beyond friends, or tell her what Embry truly is, but I like that Mom now knows he's in my life.

"Rachel loaned it to me this morning. I'm actually shocked it fit; Rachel is built like you, tall and lean. I can't believe she had anything that would fit me. Either this is one of her 'fat' dresses, or because of the elastic at the waist maybe there's more give."

Mom tilts her head to the side, a small frown on her face, "Lillah, I can't imagine Rachel is much smaller than you. Height isn't all it's cracked up to be; I wish I was tiny and petite like you."

"What?" I'm laughing at Mom wanting to be short and round like me, "Why would you ever want to be short?"

"Not short, dear, petite," Mom winks at me, "I feel like an Amazon, towering over the 'average' woman. I'm just thankful your father is a little taller than me."

I wrinkle my nose, shaking my head, "I'd give anything to feel like an Amazon. Why didn't I get the tall gene from you and Daddy? I hate being short."

"I don't know, dear, I'm not a scientist, but you remind me a lot of your Great-Grandmother on your father's side, she was _petite_ like you."

"You can call it petite all you like, Mom, that's just French for short and round," I hesitate before asking, "How long can you stay, Mom?"

She pats my knee, smiling, "Don't worry, I'll let you get back to your new life tomorrow. I'm just here for tonight. I'll leave in the morning."

"No, it's not that Mom, I just- I miss you. It's nice having you here."

Mom pulls me into a hug, "I miss you too, Lillah. But you were right earlier, you have become an adult. You've built yourself a life here in Forks; it's good to see. I also like that this new group of friends of yours is taking such good care of you. I assumed wrong this morning, and for that, I apologize."

Tears are threatening again, but I manage to hold them back as I return her hug.

As we pull back from one another, Embry sticks his head in the living room, "Good night, Mrs. Hunter, it was wonderful getting to meet you."

"You too, Embry. Have a good evening!" Mom looks over at me, one eyebrow raised questioningly.

"I'll be right back, Mom," I whisper, standing when I see her smile.

I run to the entry way where Embry is waiting for me. I don't hesitate to wrap my arms around him, sighing knowing he's leaving for the night. I want to beg him to say, but instead I mumble against his chest, "You don't have to leave, Embry."

"I know baby, but you and your mom should catch up. I'll see you tomorrow, I promise."

Knowing I'll see Embry tomorrow makes me happy, but I'm still sad to see him go. I sigh against his chest, enjoying just holding him for a few more minutes.

"Lills, when is your birthday? Earlier you said it's this month."

I smile, realizing Embry doesn't yet know everything about me, even though it feels like it sometimes, "The thirty-first. I'm a spook. Good thing I love Halloween."

Embry chuckles before he leans down to kiss the top of my head, "That is a good thing. I love Halloween too, lots of candy. Now the question is, what should I get your for your birthday?"

I'm surprised that he would even think he needs to get me anything. I don't want gifts from him, I would be happy just to spend a quiet evening alone with him for my birthday. Of course, I can't vocalize that request just yet, but I want to reassure him that I don't need him to purchase anything for me, "Oh, Embry, you don't have to get me anything."

"Of course I'm going to get you something." Embry glides his thumb over my lips, smiling sweetly, "I'm glad I have time to plan now, I can find you the perfect gift."

I want to tell him he's already given me the best gift, just by being in my life. Instead, I whisper, "I'm sure anything you get me will be perfect, Embry."

He nods then moves his fingers over my head, massaging my scalp as he speaks, "Good, now that that's settled, how long is your mom staying?"

"Just tonight, she's driving home tomorrow morning. Hopefully she won't tell Daddy too much, I really don't want him coming down here," I feel a shiver run up and down my spine at the idea of my father and Embry confronting one another. I'm more worried for what Daddy might say than what Embry might do. He was so calm and patient with my mom tonight, I know even if Daddy attacked him, Embry wouldn't lose his cool.

When Embry offers to come back tonight after Mom falls asleep, my heart starts pounding in my chest. I go up on my tiptoes to kiss Embry, telling him to use the hide-a-key later.

I practically float back into the living room, my excitement over Embry promising to return tonight too fresh for me to be able to suppress.

Returning to the sofa, I sit down, letting my mind wander to later. Mom waves her hand in front of my face to bring me back to the present; I feel the blood rush to my cheeks at getting caught daydreaming.

"Do I want to know?" Mom grins at me.

I shake my head, "No. Nothing bad. He just..." I trail off, unable to explain all the things Embry does to me.

"I noticed, so tell me about him. How did you two meet in the first place?" Mom leans back on the sofa, getting comfortable.

I tuck one leg under the other and settle in, explaining what happened that day without giving away the secrets I now guard as if they were my own, "I went to go meet up with my friend Rachel a few weeks ago. She set up a time for me to meet with her dad to discuss some of the Quileute legends, to see if they would fit in with my curriculum. When I got to the shop I saw a couple of the guys scuffling. Things started getting more heated as I approached, and that's when Embry noticed me. Not wanting me to accidentally get in the middle of this little fight, he led me away."

Mom watches me closely, only nodding as I explain how I came to meet my friend. It's kind of odd that she hasn't questioned me more. In any other case, she would have hounded me for every detail, I'm sure. Maybe now that she's laid eyes on Embry, and talked to him, she feels better knowing I have someone here watching out for me.

"I've never seen you like this, Lillah, not even with Carter."

"He's wonderful. I know, it sounds corny, but he really is. He is nothing like Carter. Carter isn't even worthy of cleaning Embry's shoes. I just, whenever I'm with him my world narrows to just him, and when he isn't around, it's like something is missing. He's patient, kind, caring, a little too over-protective, but he means well."

"Lillah, honey, it sounds like you are in love with Embry," my mom looks at me, not quite smiling, but not frowning either. "You just gave a perfect argument for why he is deserving of your love."

Glancing down at my friendship ring, I smile sadly, "He really is a wonderful man, but I can't be in love with him. We barely know one another. We've only just met a short time ago. I do care for him, but- I don't think I'm the one he's meant to be with. Embry should be with someone from the reservation. You should see these women, mom. They are gorgeous; amazing copper skin and beautiful shiny jet black hair. Their facial structure alone is exquisite. To top it off, they are strong, independent and caring."

"Sounds familiar," Mom muses when I pause. I shake my head and laugh lightly. Of course she would think that of me; she's my mother and she loves me. She doesn't know, can't understand, that Embry has an imprintee; someone perfect for him is out there just waiting for Embry to see her. Even though I know that in my mind, I still wish it could be different for Embry and me.

"Anyway," I shrug and choose to ignore my mother's implication, "he should be with someone Quileute, mom."

"Why do you keep saying that, Lillah? He deserves to be with someone that loves him and that he loves in return. It doesn't matter where she's from- where you are from. Love is love, no matter what your nationality is," Mom pauses for a moment then looks at me, narrowing her eyes in thought.

When I can't take her silence any longer I blurt out, "What?"

"Nothing, I was just remembering your Great-Grandmother. The one that you remind me of, especially with how petite you are. She was a tiny woman but strong, and not just physically. I met her when your father and I were dating; she had to be in her nineties then, but still lived another five years or so. She saw you were born and made it just a little longer past that, you were named after her, well, your middle name," my mom smiles, but seems to still be lost in thought.

I return my mom's smile, but I'm still confused, "Ok, so what made you remember her?"

"Honestly, she was a sweet woman, but kind of crazy. Your father adored her; he was the one that insisted you be named after her. I agreed, as long as I got Lillah as your first name." Mom grins at me before continuing, "I just remember right after you were born, she was holding you, beaming, she rocked you back and forth muttering something about 'wolves'."

My heart starts pounding double time at the mention of "wolves". I don't even know if these are the same stories but no matter what, I can't give myself away with my face, I have to keep the secret. I let my mom continue, keeping my head tilted down, just in case, "As soon as she started telling you stories, you would settle right down. Your father loved listening to her stories growing up; you and your father are very similar in your love of history and myths."

Mom continues, not noticing that I'm doing my best to remain calm, "Even at our wedding she was going around telling all these weird stories about her people. Like I said, sweet, but crazy. Actually, now that I think about it, I think she was Quileute. That's the reservation down at La Push, right?"

"Um, yeah, the Quileute's are down at La Push. Mom, are you saying my Great-Grandmother was Quileute?" My heart is racing even more than before. _There's a chance that I could be..._

"I think so, I can ask your father for sure. He knows all about her history," Mom looks at me, but I think this is the first time she's _really_ looked at me since she began this story. I know my cheeks must be bright red at this point, but also the excitement of the possibility must show on my face. There are tons of questions running through my head but I can't focus on any one right now. Mom starts shaking her head slowly, speaking low, "He means this much to you?"

I don't say anything, unable to speak, to admit the depth of my feelings even to my mom. When I look up again, Mom exhales then pulls me into a hug. She lets go of me then reaches for her cell phone before standing, "I'll be right back."

Unable to sit any longer, I stand as Mom exits the living room, presumably heading toward the kitchen. I make my way to the back porch, pacing back and forth, my eyes automatically searching the dark woods for any sign of Embry. Of course, I don't see anything, but I'm suddenly hit with a familiar feeling; just like a few weeks ago, I feel like someone is watching me. It's not a scary feeling; more like someone is making sure I'm safe. Now I know without a doubt that it's him, Embry is in the woods watching me. I relax slightly, but I wish he was here; not in the woods but sitting next to me as I talk with my mom. I know she and I couldn't have as honest of a conversation as we are having now, but I miss him, I miss having him near. I feel stronger with him around, I feel whole.

"Lillah?" I try to walk back into the living room, but in my excitement I'm practically running. I accidentally slam the back door, which causes my mom to jump. Placing her hand over her heart, she exhales, "What were you doing outside dear?"

"Nothing, just trying to give you some privacy," I twist my hands together to keep from acting on my sudden urge to shake my mom to get her to tell me what she knows. "Were you able to talk to Daddy?"

Mom returns to her seat on the couch, patting for me to sit next to her again. I drop down on the couch but can't stop my leg from bouncing, though whether it's from excitement or nerves I don't know. I rest my elbows on my knees, slouching, but trying to prevent my legs from bouncing right off of my body. My mom lifts an eyebrow at me then starts speaking, slowly, "Your father said that his Grandmother, your Great-Grandmother, was one hundred percent Quileute, and, to quote him, 'damn proud of it.'"

My mind can't process the information, but my heart already knows what it means. My heart keeps saying the same thing over and over: there's a chance. It's small, and probably means nothing at all, but my heart soars. _There is a chance I could be with Embry._

Mom tells me some of the basics of my great-grandmother and I do my best to pay attention, but my mind is not on the conversation. I do catch some things she says; her name was Ayiana William, but she was Ayiana Ateara before marrying Great-Grandfather William. She lived on the reservation until she moved into this house, which her husband built for her as a wedding present. She was proud of her heritage, and when Daddy showed interest, she took him down to the reservation to listen to the old Chief tell the tales of the Quileute.

"So this is good, right?" Mom is smiling.

My mind is still reeling. _I know that Ness isn't Indian, so technically my being part Quileute shouldn't matter, but with all the rest of the imprintees being Indian, I feel like my being part Quileute is important to having a shot with Embry. Sure, he hasn't said anything to me about being more than friends, but maybe once he finds out I'm like him-._ My heart screams over the chatter in my mind. _There is a chance I could be with Embry_.

I return her smile with my own excited version, "It's great, Mom. Thanks."

"Does this mean you have more of a possibility of being with Embry?" Mom, surprisingly, looks hopeful.

"I hope so."

Mom smiles and winks at me, "From what I saw tonight, there is no question how he feels about you. The way he looks at you, it's like you are the only person on the planet. You two have moments where you just seem to get _lost_ in each other."

"Oh Mom, I'm sorry, did we ignore you earlier? I promise, I was really trying to focus on you, but Embry...distracts me sometimes," I rush the words out, hating the idea that we might have somehow made Mom feel uncomfortable.

"No dear, you were fine. You two paid plenty of attention to me, don't worry," Mom's reassurance helps me relax again.

"I did notice him distracting you, but I also noticed you distracting him."

The absurdity of Mom's statement makes me laugh, "I doubt that, Mom. I've never distracted a man in my life."

"You have, just tonight. When you were telling me all the things he does for his tribe, he was looking at you with...awe. It was like he was shocked that you knew so much about him and he was impressed that you cared enough to be willing to brag on him. He didn't speak for a few moments after that; he just kept looking at you. As he was looking at you, you blushed and glanced up at him briefly, and that's when you two were in your own little world. It was almost like you were having your own side conversation, but neither of you were talking."

As much as I wish it were true, it's hard to believe, "Mom, I'm sure he was just trying to figure out how he got stuck with a talker like me."

"Lillah, trust me, based on what I saw tonight, Embry would happily affix you to him," Mom clears her throat then smiles a sheepish grin at me. "Ok, it's honesty time. I came downstairs earlier to get a cup of tea; it was right after Embry helped me with my bag."

"You did? I don't remember you coming down," I wrack my brain trying to remember what happened after Embry took her bag upstairs.

"When I came into the kitchen, Embry walked up behind you. It was like you sank back into him. He didn't just wrap his arms around you; it was like he was trying to wrap his entire body around you. His feet were next to yours, his arms wrapped around you and pulled you against him, his shoulders hunched forward over you, and then he leaned down and kissed your neck."

I blush bright red and start explaining, "No, Mom, it wasn't- we weren't- he just-."

"Lillah, I'm not upset. I'm trying to help you understand what I saw tonight. I know Carter was not good to you, but you said yourself, Embry is nothing like Carter. Don't underestimate how much of an impact you have on him. When he pulled you to him earlier, it was like he was trying to make you part of him, like you were the missing piece to make him whole."

I close my eyes, trying to prevent the tears from even starting. I hope my mom didn't see what happened after he pulled me to him; that would be embarrassing. Still feeling like I owe her an explanation, I speak low as I try to tell her what was going on, what she might not have heard, "Mom, I think you just saw how intense Embry was about what we were discussing. He was trying to tell me how he finds me beautiful."

Shaking my head, the laughter bubbles out uncontrollably, "He's always trying to convince me I'm beautiful, that I don't need to work out. He calls me short and curvy, like that helps. He even told me today he thinks I'm more beautiful than you are."

"I knew I liked him."

I look up at Mom, surprised by her comment, "What?"

"Embry. I like him, he's right, you are beautiful and you don't need to lose weight. I would hope he finds you more beautiful than me, it could be an awkward situation if he didn't," she grins at me.

Closing my eyes, I lean back against the sofa, "I'm glad you like him, I like him too, Mom."

"I figured, dear. I think he likes you too. He is definitely protective of you. When I walked into the living room this afternoon, it looked like he was ready to attack. He stepped right in front of you and had this look on his face like he'd bite the head off of anyone that dared to even come near you."

"Yeah, he's a little over protective," I giggle at my own understatement. Embry still won't drop the football players thing, he practically attacked Angie when she walked in on us, and the last time I mentioned Carter Embry called himself a possessive fucker. _Definitely an understatement_.

Mom laughs, "I for one am glad to hear he's protective, it makes me worry a little less about my baby girl."

I sigh, sitting up and hugging my mom, "I promise, Mom, I'm fine."

"I know you are, dear. Mind if I give you a little motherly advice?"

I smile softly as I pull back from our hug, "Sure Mom."

"First, don't fight it. Whether Embry is the man for you or not, you two have a very special connection. Enjoy that connection, it's a rare thing. Second, believe him when he says you are beautiful. I don't think he's like Carter; he isn't going to try to change you. He likes you just as you are, Lillah, accept that his compliments are real. Third, pay close attention to not just what he says, but his actions. Embry being so protective of you might be one of the ways he shows he cares for you."

I roll my eyes, "Mom, did you just give me a closing argument?"

Mom shrugs one shoulder delicately, "I might have, and I am a lawyer after all." She smiles, "But I'm also your mother and a woman, trust me. I saw what Carter put you through. After spending one evening with Embry, I can tell he would never do anything to hurt you. Like you said, he's a good man. Just- be careful, you are using protection, right?"

"MOM!" I cringe at having this conversation, "Embry and I aren't having sex. He- Embry knows I'm a virgin. He says he won't take that from me, that I should save it for the man I love." I want to cry, admitting this to my mom.

"Oh Lillah! Honey, this is what I meant about paying close attention. You spent the night at his house last night and I'm not naive, I assume you two have done more than kissed. I can't imagine virginity would be a big deal unless there is something more going on; like he doesn't think you could feel that way for him." Mom pauses then grins, "What about these new friends of yours? Rachel and the other girls, they know Embry, right? Have you talked with them about the situation?"

My head moves up and down, "That's actually why I was drinking last night, the girls were giving me advice." Blushing remembering the girls suggestions, I look away from my mom before speaking, "They think I should seduce him."

"That's probably a very good idea, as long as you are careful. They've known Embry for a while, right?"

I ignore the first part of her comment, "Yes. Rachel practically grew up with him. They are a tight knit group, like a big family."

"That's good, they probably know Embry and can help you figure out how best to handle him. It's good to see they've accepted you into their family, it's quite an honor, Lillah."

I smile at Mom, "It really is, they are such an amazing group of people."

I close my eyes again, enjoying just being with my Mom. Between her work and my school we really haven't had time to talk in a while. I've enjoyed tonight, but I'm sad she has to go back so soon.

"You should go rest dear, maybe take a bath. You've had a long day, I'm sure you're exhausted."

I suppress my chuckle at the mention of a bath. _Thanks to Embry, a bath will never be the same._ I'm suddenly ready to go to bed, knowing the sooner my mom goes to sleep, the sooner Embry can return to me.

Sitting up straight, I hug my mom again, "That sounds like a great idea, Mom. Feel free to make yourself comfortable, Angela is out for the night, so you'll have the whole upstairs to yourself."

"Alright dear, sleep tight, I'll see you in the morning."

I stand, heading toward my room, "Night Mom, I love you."

"I love you too, dear."

-0-

I can feel fingertips gently gliding over the skin of my thigh, moving under my shorts and panties, toward my butt. I also feel soft lips and a warm tongue sliding down my neck and over my shoulder. I feel Embry next to me; his chest pressed against mine, one of his legs trapped between my thighs and his erection obvious against my stomach. I'm barely awake but I'm fully aroused by his presence; almost instantly I feel moisture between my thighs.

"Good morning," I manage to mumble the words out.

Embry flattens his hand under my shorts and my panties, easily covering my butt, the tips of his long fingers inching closer to the aching spot between my legs. He lifts his head, brushing his lips against mine, "It's a very good morning."

"Someone's in a good mood. Why are you so cheerful this early?" My alarm hasn't even gone off, so I know it's not even six yet. I slowly open my eyes, grinning when I see Embry's smiling face so close to me.

"How could I not be in a good mood? I went to sleep and woke up with a gorgeous red head wrapped around me," Embry winks at me.

"You are silly, Embry. It's so easy for men to look good in the morning. I look atrocious, you are just saying I look gorgeous to get in my pants," I rub my nose against his, trying to make sure he knows I'm teasing him.

Embry winks then I feel his hand moving. I bite my lip to keep from gasping when one finger slowly slides along my wet lips. Embry's hand moves back to my butt, "I'm already in your pants, Lillah. I've never seen you look atrocious, but I think you look amazing first thing in the morning."

"You think wild hair, no makeup, and bad breath looks amazing? Embry, you might want to go talk to someone about your issues," my hand moves to cup his cheek, grinning before letting my fingers tangle in his silky hair.

Embry's lips join mine, kissing me a little deeper this time. I easily forget my morning breath, sinking into his kiss with ease. When Embry pulls back, I want to whine at the loss, but stop myself when he speaks, "How about I tell _you_ about my issues?" I giggle, but nod, enjoying our teasing as he continues, "After sharing a bed with me, I can smell my scent on you. That alone is enough to turn me on."

I run my nose along his shoulder, inhaling deeply, "That's not fair, I don't smell me on you."

"Trust me, it's there," Embry grins. "It's tough to focus on an oil change when your scent keeps distracting me throughout the day."

"Mmm, should I apologize?" My tongue flicks out, needing to taste his warm skin.

Embry sounds almost like he's purring, "Absolutely not."

I lean back, but he holds me tightly to him, still not understanding why he finds me so attractive in the mornings, "Is that all? Just your scent on me makes me gorgeous?"

"No, that is definitely not all, in the morning is when you are the most relaxed. Also, when you wake up, it's like your body is ready, waiting for me to show you how beautiful I know you are."

Embry slides two fingers between my legs, driving me crazy. I know I need to be quiet, so I tug on his hair, tilting his head back to muffle myself against his neck. This time he doesn't stop at just sliding over my lips, he easily slips one finger into me. I tighten my grip on his hair, sucking his skin into my mouth on my gasp. Embry removes his finger, his hand returning to its resting place on my butt.

I lean back again, repeating myself but sounding a little more aggravated; his teasing getting to me, along with his satisfied smile, I push my hips forward meeting his obvious erection, "Is that all?"

"Just one more thing. You look gorgeous in the morning because my scent is on you, you are relaxed, you body is turned on, and your hair is wild. There's only one other time that you look like that. Know when that is?"

Embry has a wicked look on his face, so I know he's up to no good, but I honestly can't understand what he's talking about, probably because all I can think about is having him touch me again, "No, I don't know." I brush my lips across his gently, "Tell me, Embry."

"You look just like that," Embry easily rolls me over until I'm flat on my back. My legs circle his hips, tugging him down until I feel his erection against me once more. We both moan softly at the contact and Embry leans forward, again capturing my lips. When he releases my lips he finally explains, "Right after you cum for me, your hair is all wild, your body is still humming from my touch, you are relaxed, and my scent is all over you."

I can't decide if I should yell at him or beg him to finish what he started. _Or both._ I know my face is pink from this conversation, but it has managed to wake me up better than any coffee. The alarm interrupts my thoughts. Embry and I reach over to shut it off simultaneously. He, of course, is able to reach it without moving, "You are a cheater with those long arms."

"Are you trying to change the subject, baby?" Embry drops his head to my ear, sucking my earlobe into his mouth, then continues down my neck and along my jaw. Gently kissing and nipping at my skin.

My hands return to his silky hair, pulling the short strands until he looks at me again, "I'm not changing the subject, but I think you are trying to distract me." There is a tingling in the pit of my stomach and my thighs are already wet. To show him, that I want, need, him to continue, I press my hips to meet his.

"Me? Distract you?" Embry leans back slightly, pushing my top up until he exposes my breasts. He leans forward taking one nipple into his mouth as he cups my other breast. Unable to remain quiet, I turn my head to moan into my pillow. Embry pulls me up so he can remove my top, then leans forward immediately, his lips moving over mine again, "I think it's you who is distracting me with your amazing body. You are too tempting, I can't focus with you in my arms."

"Embry, even if you can't focus, you are still in control," he looks up at me with a wicked smile on his face. As he slides lower down my body, kissing over my stomach. "You know my mom is here, we can't-."

He slides my shorts off, grinning as he looks up my exposed body, "Do you want me to stop? We can always go for a run instead."

"You think I want to go run right now?" I sit up, pulling Embry to me. Needing to show my frustration, I nip at his bottom lip, "You don't play fair. You woke me up knowing what you wanted to do." Running my hands down Embry's chest, I stop at the elastic of his boxers. Unable to look at him I keep my eyes locked on his chest as I ask a question that has been bothering me lately, "Embry, will I ever get to see you naked?"

Embry's deep laugh surprises me, when I look up at him it looks like he's trying to hold in his laughter. I lightly smack his chest before leaning back against the pillows, pulling the covers up around me, "What's so funny?"

"It's not funny, I'm sorry, Lillah," Embry pushes the covers back, sliding behind me, tugging my back against his chest. "Would you believe me if I told you I was trying not to scare you?"

Embry's hands are moving over my body again; one is teasing my nipple while the other slides over my hip. I both love and hate how he knows just how to touch me to make me lose all focus. Closing my eyes, I do my best to not pay attention to his hands, instead, trying to focus on his words, "What about you being naked would scare me? Are you hideously deformed?"

"No," he chuckles against my neck, "nothing like that. I'm just- I mean- I'm in proportion-." He cuts himself off, resting his cheek against mine, he exhales. I can feel a small grin on his face, "I feel like you all of a sudden."

Gathering all my courage, I roll over, climbing on top of him, my hips straddling his. I grin, but it doesn't hide the blush I can feel already forming before the words even leave my mouth. Echoing Rachel, I slowly speak, "Embry, are you trying to say that you have a big-," I pause, closing my eyes as I say the word, "cock?"

"Fuck! That is so wrong but so fucking hot to hear you say!" Embry's lips attack mine. This kiss is very different from any we have shared before, it's raw and passionate, intense. His hands are everywhere on my body; touching, stroking, pinching. It's too much, he's overwhelming me again.

His mouth continues his assault on my lips as two of his fingers find my center. I try to gasp but he steals my breath with his kisses. Instead of moving inside of me like normal, Embry's fingers slide from me, making me whimper at the loss. His hand pulls mine from around his chest then moves it into his boxers. His hand places mine on his erection, but I feel his hand move away quickly.

Embry pulls back from my mouth and it makes me smile that he's gasping as much as I am. When I look up at Embry he grins, "Just covering my cock," he winks at me, "with your arousal. This time it's all you, do with my cock as you please. But, you should know," Embry gently nips at my neck, "my fingers are going to be in your pussy."

I shiver at Embry's words, never imagining that these words could be such a turn on, but with Embry, nothing is as I would expect it to be. I slowly run my thumb over his tip, grinning when he groans as I slide my hand down his shaft. I'm again impressed by his length, but not scared. Before I can tell him this, his lips move over my neck up to my ear, "I'm going to try something I think you'll like."

My hands tighten over him as I feel his fingers return to me. I grin, enjoying the slow movement of his fingers filling me, but this time there is more. My eyes go wide then I lose all ability to focus. The pressure is amazing, Embry's fingers stretching me as he moves them within me manages to send me over the edge quickly. Without thinking about it, my hand increases in both speed and pressure over Embry. Needing to remain quiet I sink my teeth into Embry's shoulder to muffle my screams against him as I ride out my orgasm.

I'm still panting against his shoulder when Embry pulls my lips back up to his. Realizing he's close, I shorten my strokes on him as he instructed me previously, my free hand tugging at his hair. I feel Embry growl against my mouth just before I feel him release.

Neither of us says anything for a few minutes. Finally, Embry mumbles, "I don't like being quiet."

"This was your big plan," I chuckle against his neck.

Embry shrugs, "I just wanted to feel you, you are the one that said 'cock'. You are too damn sexy." Embry grins broadly then wiggles his eyebrows, "I take it you liked my little addition?"

I giggle, "So, I just have to say," I pause, still blushing over the word, "'cock' and you go crazy? You were very...aggressive. I more than liked what just happened, what was different?"

"You better stop saying 'cock' or we will never leave this bed and your mom will know I'm corrupting her baby girl," Embry grins but kisses me again, back to his gentle touch. He pulls back and whispers against my ear, "Three fingers."

Embry's eyes are on me as he sticks three of his fingers into his mouth and then slowly pulls them back out, "Fuck you taste good, baby." He moves his fingers to my mouth, easily covering my lips with his fingers. I shiver at the feeling, knowing his three fingers still don't match what it would be like to have him in me. I suddenly understand why he thought I might be scared, but instead, I'm excited. I want to have him fill me completely, now.

My tongue flicks out, licking his fingers, grinning when his eyes go wide. Watching him enjoy the taste of me, I'm curious to know what he tastes like. When he moves his hand from my lips I lift my hand that is still in his boxers. Keeping my eyes locked on his, I slide my tongue over my thumb.

Embry growls, burying his mouth against my shoulder, nipping at it to stay quiet, "Woman." He pauses then glances at me cautiously, "So?"

"Mmm, should I say 'Fuck you taste good', too?" I grin against his cheek, inhaling his scent, now knowing he tastes like he smells.

Embry laughs, kissing up my neck, "That would make me feel better, and turn me on even more."

I turn to face him, licking my lips before kissing him slowly. I pull back briefly, smiling wide, "In that case, fuck you taste good."

Embry laughs deep in his chest, pulling me tight against him. I sink into his body, enjoying the feeling of laughing while we kiss. Embry doesn't push it any further, but I'm ok with that, enjoying the simplicity of kissing.

Embry eventually sighs against my lips, breaking our kiss, "Come on, you need to get ready and I need to go home before I can go to work."

"What, you don't want to shower here? Then you would smell like me all day." I giggle at the idea, "I'm sure the guys wouldn't give you too much crap."

"They have no room to talk. Especially Paul. When he first-," Embry stops mid-sentence, which surprises me, but quickly continues, "I would be proud to smell like you all day, but I wouldn't get any work done."

Embry stands up from the bed, grinning down at me as he pulls on his sweats, "You really are beautiful first thing in the morning."

"You aren't half bad yourself." I grin, standing to pull on my clothes quickly then grabbing my robe from the bathroom.

"What are you doing?" Embry asks as I grab his hand before he opens the bedroom door.

I grin up at him, "Walking you out, of course."

Embry picks me up into his arms before opening the door, "No complaining, you would make too much noise."

I pretend to zip my lips, wrapping my arms around Embry's broad shoulders as he carries me through my house. He easily opens the back door, making sure to be quiet as he closes it. He slowly lowers my body until my feet are firmly on the back porch, then cups my cheek, kissing me softly.

Sighing, I lean into him, "I sound like a broken record, but dinner? Tonight?"

Embry nods, dropping one last kiss on my lips, "I'd love to, I'll be over right after patrols."

I lean up on my tiptoes, hugging him tight. Embry holds me close then moves his lips over my neck, whispering, "I'll see you tonight. Promise."

He steps back then slowly opens the screen door, waving one last time before he walks into the woods. I reluctantly turn around, walking back into the house. Quietly I return to my room, once again rushing through my morning routine, but this time more careful to cover up Embry's handy work with my clothes and make up.

I walk into the kitchen a short time later, smiling when I see my mom already at the kitchen table, "Good morning, Mom." I walk over and give her a quick hug before pouring a cup of coffee for myself.

When I sit down at the table, Mom grins at me, "You know, Lillah, Embry didn't have to leave this morning on my behalf."

I manage to swallow the coffee without choking but still sputter out, "Wha-? Mom!"

"Its ok, Lillah, I understand. I was going to enjoy the sunrise on the back porch with my coffee, I started to open the door but saw the two of you out there. I simply turned around and left you alone," Mom winks at me, "He really is an attractive man."

I blush but nod in agreement, "He really is."

"He's good for you, Lillah. Mind if I give you one last piece of advice before I go?"

"Sure, Mom," knowing she's leaving soon makes me sad, but I'm glad we got this time together.

"Hold on to him tight and be willing to fight for him, because I think he's worth it. He seems like a good man and based on what I've seen, it's like you two were made for each other," Mom pats my hand then smiles. "Come on, time for me to hit the road and for you to get to school."

I help Mom take her bag out to her car, giving her one last hug before she leaves. She smiles at me, wiping at my tears, "My baby girl is all grown up. As happy as I am, it feels like just yesterday I was holding you in my arms. How did you become such an amazing woman?"

"I learned from my mom."

She chuckles then gets in the car, waving as she backs out of the driveway.

-0-

The day drags by. I update Rachel on what happened yesterday over lunch at the diner. Of course, Rachel quizzes me about my new 'ring' when she sees me playing with it. I just shrug and smile, which seems to frustrate Rachel even more. She does tell me to keep the dress she loaned me yesterday. I balk at this idea but she says it was too short for her to wear in public.

We spend most of lunch discussing what happened with my mom, including her reaction to Embry. Rachel is impressed by how well behaved Embry was, and by how positive my mom seemed to be about him. She asks all kinds of questions and I answer as best as I can, making sure to leave out my mom guessing my true feelings for Embry. _The last thing I need is for Rachel to hear that, she would never let it go.  
_  
I decide to go for a run when I get home, needing to work off both the food and the tension from the past few days. My emotions have been on such a roller coaster that I don't know what "normal" is for me anymore. When I'm with Embry I'm elated. When we are apart I miss him, I feel empty. I haven't even known him two full weeks, and yet, I don't ever want to be away from him. Even as I run I can feel his eyes on me; knowing he's watching makes me smile. It's unconventional, but I know this is how Embry shows he cares, by guarding me, making sure I'm safe.

I shower and change, waiting for him to arrive. When he walks in, I practically throw myself at him in my excitement to see him again. We land on the sofa, laughing as we enjoy our privacy again. Just as Embry is lifting my shirt we both hear the front door slam and Angela call out, "Lah? I'm home! You here?"

Embry drops his head to my shoulder, chuckling as he speaks, "Am I ever going to get a quiet evening alone with you again?"

I exhale slowly, but smile when I look up at him, "Hopefully, but not tonight." I grin up at him as he helps me stand, "Sorry, Em, you have to share me with my family and friends, including Angela and Rachel."

"Yeah, yeah," he kisses me softly then follows me into the kitchen. Embry and I cook dinner while Angela gets settled. When Angela returns, we catch up over dinner. She's sad she missed seeing my mom, but isn't surprised she paid a visit. I don't give her the full reason behind Mom's sudden appearance, but Angela has a pretty good idea.

Since Angela knows Embry has been around a lot, he doesn't pretend to leave tonight. He does offer to do the dishes again, giving Angela and me a chance to talk. Before leaving the kitchen, I give him a quick hug, whispering against his lips, "Close your ears, girl talk coming up."

"I'll try," he grins, "but I make no promises."

When I walk into the living room, Angela pounces, grilling me about what has been going on with Embry. She asks about my friendship ring, which now feels like part of me, only taking it off so that it doesn't get damaged when I run, cook, or do anything that could get it wet, like shower or wash my hands. I fill her in on what really happened to bring my mom out to visit. Angela is mortified for me, but does mention she isn't completely surprised, "Given how much time you've spent with Embry lately, I figured she'd find out somehow."

I agree with her, then manage to change the subject to her and Ben. Angela gushes over how great it has been to spend quality alone time with Ben. She even mentions that Ben has hinted about her officially moving in with him. My heart sinks at the idea of losing my cousin, but soars thinking about being able to have Embry here all the time without interruption. Of course, my mind drifts off, thinking about having Embry here full time; him not having to rush off every morning.

Embry sitting down beside me on the couch brings me out of my daydream. He grins at me then whispers against my ear, "May I listen now?"

"Yes. Thanks for doing the dishes, you didn't have to," I lean against him, resting my head on his shoulder.

Angela clears her throat, "So, Embry, tell me about yourself. You're friends with Jacob, right? You must know Bella too."

Suddenly Embry is very tense, which surprises me. He's polite when he responds, but his arm snakes out and pulls me tight against him, "I know Bella. It's been a while since I've seen her though."

"Yeah, me too. After graduation it got harder and harder to keep up with everyone. I did talk to Jessica the other day, she mentioned a new boyfriend..." Angela slowly ends that topic, like she doesn't want to discuss it. I never liked her friend Jessica, which Angela knows. When I would visit, Jessica reminded me a lot of the girls at Seattle Prep; thinking she was better than me just because she was tiny and perfect. I assume this is why Angela dropped the subject so quickly.

"So you live down at the reservation? You guys are all pretty close, huh?"

I smile up at Embry, answering for him, "They are like a family."

"That's cool. So what do you do?"

Embry answers Angela this time, "I work at Sam's shop, HWService, on the reservation."

"Do you guys work on all types of cars?"

"Sure, why?"

Angela frowns, "My car is about to die, it's a ninety-three Honda Accord. I don't have a lot of money to put into it, but I really don't feel like buying a new one."

"Bring it by the shop, we are open most days. We are way cheaper, and better, than the shop here in Forks," Embry grins and it makes me proud to see him so confident about his work.

"Cool, I might drop by tomorrow. Ben keeps telling me I need to get it fixed, but the shop here in Forks estimated it would cost over three thousand to fix it, since it's a Honda. Something about the engine being upside down," Angela shakes her head, "I really don't know anything about cars."

"That is ridiculous. Bring it by, I'm sure Sam will work with you, he'll help you to get it in working shape without breaking the bank."

"Thanks, Embry. I appreciate it. Ok, I'm exhausted, it's been a long week. I'll give you two some privacy. Good night!"

"Night, Ang," I give her a quick hug, "I've missed you."

Angela whispers back, "I've missed you too, but he seems to be taking good care of you."

I blush but nod before leaning back against Embry's chest.

"Good night, Angela," Embry grins as she stands from the sofa.

"Oh," Angela spins back around to face us, a smile evident on her face, "just so you know, I'm probably going to spend the weekend at Ben's place. So you two will have the house to yourselves. Enjoy!"

As soon as Angela is out of the room, Embry pulls me into his lap, where I'm facing him, "Finally alone."

"Finally," I whisper against his chest, enjoying the peace and quiet of just listening to his steady heartbeat.

We sit in silence for a while, Embry twisting his fingers in my hair and me closing my eyes, listening to his even breathing.

-0-

I must have fallen asleep in Embry's arms, because the next thing I know, my alarm is going off. Before I can reach it, Embry slaps it off.

I snuggle up against Embry, inhaling his wonderful scent, "I fell asleep on you? I'm sorry!"

"Its ok, baby. It's been a long week for both of us. After I got you into bed and undressed, it didn't take long for me to fall asleep either." Embry kisses my forehead, over the bridge of my nose to my lips, "Good morning."

As I stretch, I rub my cheek against his, reveling in the feeling of his stubble. When I lean back, I cup his cheek, blushing slightly as I speak, "I like your morning stubble. It's very sexy."

"All of you is very sexy in the morning. Should we be good and go for a run this morning, or have some fun again?"

I curl up against him, my eyes closing easily, "Neither, I want to snooze this morning."

Embry chuckles but agrees, setting the alarm. What feels like just a few minutes later he's waking me up again, saying goodbye and telling me I need to get up. I move to sit on the side of the bed and he stands in between my legs. He leans down, brushing his lips over mine before whispering, "I'll see you tonight. I have a surprise for you."

"A surprise? What?"

Embry kisses me again before stepping back, "Now if I told you, it wouldn't be a surprise. I'll see you later, baby."

-0-

When the school year began the days would rush by. I felt like I'd barely walked in the door and the final bell would be ringing. That hasn't been the case this week, and today is the worst. I feel like one of the students, glancing at the clock every few minutes, wishing like crazy it was time to leave. It's finally Friday and I'm anxious for the weekend, hoping I can spend some quality quiet time with Embry. Then there's the family dinner, which I'm looking forward to, but I'm a little nervous knowing everyone is planning to attend. I love Embry's wolf family as if they were my own but they are all so close, I don't know what the reaction outside of the imprintees will be. I'm happy that I have Rachel, Emily and Kim at least to make me feel welcome. And Ness, of course, who I'm hoping I'll be able to spend some time with as well.

Rachel pops her head in my classroom after second period, "Lunch at the diner?"

"I brought left overs," the salad I packed this morning doesn't sound very appetizing, but I can't justify going to the diner to get a salad when I have one already. Rachel frowns at me and says she'll grab something from the vending machine and stop by my classroom later. I'm fine with this arrangement and nod my head.

A few hours later we are enjoying the quiet of my classroom, without the probing of the other faculty and the noise of the loud students. Rachel and I talk about the family dinner tomorrow night and I realize that I really am a part of the family now. _I'm part Quileute._ I avoid mentioning my Quileute heritage to her, wanting to talk with Embry, or maybe Billy, first. I feel like this is a big deal, but I don't know why. My heart hopes it means I have a chance with Embry, but my mind keeps telling me if he hasn't said anything yet, there's no chance for me.

The rest of the school day drags by, just as the days before have. I'm grading papers while my last class of the day takes a test when I receive a text from Embry.

_Your surprise is still on for tonight, don't plan on making dinner. -E_

I grin and begin to type out a reply to him.

_Are you taking me out on a date? _I shake my head and delete, starting again. I don't want him to feel obligated if that isn't what he has planned.

_You aren't going to burn my kitchen down are you?_ I frown as I reconsider. Maybe Embry isn't planning on us eating at my place. Delete and start again.

_I'm intrigued. I can't wait to see you. Do I need to be dressed for what you have in mind?__ –L _

I don't mean it the way it comes out and I don't realize what it implies until I've already pressed 'send'. Embry comes back quickly.

_Unfortunately, you do. I might enjoy eating off of your body but it would be awkward for what I have planned. -E_

I laugh and roll my eyes, alerting some of my students to the fact that I'm using my BlackBerry in class when they are forbidden to do the same. _Oops._

_I didn't mean that, dirty boy. I just wanted to know should I dress up. -L_

_Nope. And that's all I'm telling you. -E_

_You are no fun. Not even a little hint? -L_

_No, sorry. Just allow me to surprise you, please? -E_

_Ok. When will I see you? After patrols? -L_

_Yep. I'm running home for a shower then I'll be there, can't wait. -E_

_Me either. -L_

I look back down at the papers I'm grading and continue marking them with a red pen. A few minutes later I see the red light flashing on my BlackBerry from the corner of my eye.

_Don't wear panties. -E_

I don't reply this time, instead dropping my head down onto my desk with a thud, hoping none of the students noticed how red I just turned. The thought of not wearing panties with Embry excites me, I press my thighs together hoping to calm my ache; making me more eager to see him.

-0-

I pull into my driveway, not knowing what Embry has in store for me. I'm a little anxious but a whole lot excited. I grab my purse and jump out of the car, running for the porch as fast as my legs will take me. I don't see Embry's truck out front but that doesn't mean anything. He said he wasn't coming over until after patrols.

Hoping part of my surprise is him being here earlier than planned, I call out his name softly, but there are no sounds in the house. _He hasn't arrived yet, I guess._ Shuffling my feet, I walk into the bedroom, planning to go for a run to relieve some of my anxiousness for tonight. Taped to the bathroom door I find a note, signed from Embry. Seeing his handwriting makes my stomach jump. _Stop Lillah, you are acting like a teenager._ But this is more than just some teenage crush, everything Embry does gives me a thrill.

The note is simple, "Don't run, relax. I promise, I won't interrupt your bath this time. I should be back before six-thirty. See you soon, Embry."

I do as told, removing my school clothes and resting in the bath. I'm so relaxed after my bath that I decide a nap is in order. I close my eyes and drift off quickly.

When I wake up I realize it's already a quarter after six, so I rush around the room getting dressed. Since Embry didn't say I needed to dress up, I pull on a t-shirt and grey yoga pants, sans panties.

When I walk into the kitchen I see a smiling Embry sitting at the kitchen table. I barely have time to return his smile before his lips are on mine. Almost immediately, his hands sink below the elastic of my pants. I'm assuming he's checking if I did as he asked. I thought Embry was only joking with his "no panties" text earlier, but turns out, he wasn't. _Good thing I listened._ I can feel the growl that comes from deep in his chest, which causes my body to react. _I need him. Now._

Just as I'm about to beg him to take me to the bedroom, the doorbell rings. Embry pulls back from me slowly, whispering he'll be right back. I use his absence to straighten myself up, not sure who might be at the door. _Will we ever get a quiet night to ourselves?_

I'm glad I had a few minutes to compose myself, because I'm completely surprised when Embry walks back into the kitchen with Billy behind him. Embry explains he invited Billy over to eat with us and to talk to me about the tribal legends, the ones I was supposed to hear on the day we met. The sweetness of the gestures makes my heart flutter and I hug him, kissing his cheek without a second thought. When I turn to smile at Billy he is grinning at me. He looks like he knows something, like he has a secret but I'm too excited about tonight to care.

Embry informs us that dinner is baking and we should relax in the living room until it's ready. I follow Billy and Embry, smiling when Embry moves the coffee table so Billy can sit closer to us. Embry takes a seat on the couch and pulls me onto his lap without question. I want to move, feeling awkward, but when I glance at Billy, his smile is wide, almost understanding.

As I relax back against him, Embry wraps his arms around my waist. One of his hands is placed on my thigh, his thumb tracing the seam of my pants, just above my knee. _He definitely has this teasing thing down pat._ I can't allow myself to react with Billy sitting just a few feet away, even if he seems ok with how close Embry and I are. I feel like I owe him an apology for our bonfire transgressions of last week, but he just continues to smile at us.

We chit chat while dinner finishes in the oven, Billy asking Embry which of the imprintees he paid off to make the dinner for him. Embry made Enchiladas and managed it rather skillfully. He jokes that it's the only thing he can cook without burning it to a crisp, but I know better than to believe him. He's always full of surprises.

When Billy, Embry and I sit down at my kitchen table a short time later it feels comfortable and right. These two men, along with the other members of the tribe, have come to mean a lot to me. Any other time I would question this, wonder why I feel so connected to them all but now I know a part of their heritage runs through my blood. I'm barely halfway through my over flowing plate of food when Embry finally begins the discussion that brought Billy over. I recall bits and pieces of the tales that Billy begins reciting, but most everything from the bonfire is a blur.

As Billy speaks, Embry starts clearing the table. I want to argue but he tells me to enjoy my surprise. Once he has cleaned the kitchen, Embry returns to the table. He easily lifts me from my chair and places me in his lap again. Billy doesn't pause in his storytelling, seemingly unphased by Embry's behavior.

I'm so engrossed in Billy's stories that I don't realize how late it is. Billy chuckles when I suppress a yawn. I feel bad, but he tells me we have plenty of time for me to hear all the stories. _I hope so._

I walk out with Billy and Embry, Embry easily helping Billy get his wheel chair down my front steps and help him into his truck. As I give Billy a hug, I finally ask him about my great-grandmother.

"Billy, have you ever heard the name Ayiana William? Or Ayiana Ateara?"

Billy pauses for a moment, glancing at Embry briefly before smiling at me, "I've heard of Ayiana William. I think she was Old Quil Ateara's aunt, Quil's grandfather. You can ask him about her tomorrow night. Why?"

I glance back at Embry; he looks confused, but he's smiling. I squeeze his hand, not breaking our eye contact as I speak, "She was my great-grandmother, and my great-grandfather built this house for her."

-0-

**A/N:** Oh really? How do you think Embry will react to that little fact? Check out our blog at stupidleeches[dot]com/2010/09/sequels-poll/ leave a comment on the blog entry to let us know what other pairings you'd like to see us write. Family dinner coming up next! See you next Tuesday!  
**  
**


	24. Chapter 24 Everything I Could Wish For

**Chapter 24 "Everything I Could Wish For"**

**Disclaimer:** We wish we were Stephenie Meyer. Well, we wish we had her money. And a copy of COMPLETED Midnight Sun. Everything else she can keep.

**A/N: **Another Tuesday! So this is another long ass chapter. But we had lots to pack in here, including the much anticipated family dinner! Hope you enjoy! **Note:** We've added a new feature to our website. If you register (click on "Subscribe" at stupidleeches[dot]com) you can receive all of our updates and teasers via email.

_I've got an angel  
She doesn't wear any wings  
She wears a heart that can melt my own  
She wears a smile that can make me wanna sing  
She gives me presents  
With her presence alone  
She gives me everything I could wish for  
She gives me kisses on the lips just for coming home_  
"Angel" - Jack Johnson

**EPOV**

_Don't wear panties. What the fuck was I thinking?_ I knew my plans for the evening included having Billy come over to Lillah's house; I knew there would be no way in hell I could touch her with Billy there. I'd already fucked up by distracting her during the bonfire, I needed to behave and let her listen to the stories.

But no, I'm a sick fucker that likes to be tortured. My punishment is to spend the evening holding, touching, and smelling a _clothed_ Lillah. With her walking around taunting me, when I know I could easily slide her ass hugging yoga pants off, and be just where I want; but I can't. _Oh do I want to._ Even though she is completely focused on Billy's stories, her body still reacts to me. She has been turned on all night; starting with the kiss earlier in the kitchen when I discovered she had listened to my sick ass and wasn't wearing panties, all the way through dinner to right now. _Fucking torture._ Lillah being turned on just served to get me going.

As Billy has been speaking I've been playing with her hair, mostly to keep my hands occupied while my mind wanders. _I could lay her back on the kitchen table; make her come on my tongue again. Or after Billy leaves I could put her on the counter, leave her pants on as I dip my fingers into her waiting pussy and watch her explode in front of me. She'd be able to stroke me too then. Fuck I love it when she touches me._

I'm considering the back porch swing when I hear Lillah try to stifle her yawn. I push all my dirty thoughts to the back of my mind and look up to find Billy lifting his eyebrows in question. I smile and nod, thanking Billy for coming over tonight as I help Lillah to stand; she argues she isn't tired, which just makes me laugh.

Billy chuckles as he moves ahead of us in his wheelchair, "Trust me, Lillah, there will be plenty of time for you to hear these stories."

"You are a fantastic story teller, Billy. Thank you!" Lillah stands back as I help Billy down the front steps. Once he's moving toward his truck, she runs up to join me again. She stands next to me, patiently waiting as I help Billy into his truck and put the wheelchair in the back.

She steps toward Billy, giving him a hug. I hear her whisper to him, "Billy, have you ever heard the name Ayiana William? Or Ayiana Ateara?"

He pauses and looks between us before smiling wide, "I've heard of Ayiana William. I think she was Old Quil Ateara's aunt, Quil's grandfather. You can ask him about her tomorrow night. Why?"

Lillah looks back at me and squeezes my hand. I can see in her eyes she's unsure, but I hope she isn't worried about how I'll react. I can't think of anything she'd say now that could upset me. I clench my fingers around hers when she squeezes mine and I smile, trying to put her at ease. What she says next just about knocks me on my ass.

"She was my great-grandmother, and my great-grandfather built this house for her."

_Lillah is part Quileute?_ I stare at her in shock. _Her great-grandmother was old Quil's aunt. She's related to Quil._ I'm a little dumbfounded. _Lillah, my Lillah, is-_ I shake my head and focus on her face but I can't tell what she's thinking. _Is she happy about this? Does she want to be tied to the Rez through bloodlines?_ My heart skips around in my chest a little and I glance at Billy. He's watching us closely and when he meets my stare he smiles crookedly, looking just like Jacob. He gives me a cocky look that says 'I told you she was meant for you'.

When I glance back at Lillah she looks anxious and still unsure. I don't understand why she seems so nervous. She can't really expect me to be unhappy about this new information. _Not fucking likely._

"You're," I pause and do the math in my head, "one-eighth Quileute? When- how did you find out?"

"My mom told me the other night. She was telling me how my being 'petite'," she rolls her eyes, "reminded her of my great-grandmother, then she called my dad to make sure."

I look back at Billy to find he's cranked his truck and is about to pull out of the driveway. He doesn't speak, just gives me a look before driving away. I glance back down at Lillah and realize she's waiting for me to say something. Her bottom lip is pulled between her teeth and she's biting it anxiously.

"That's, wow," I begin to speak but I pause to look at her closely. Now that I'm looking for it, I can see little hints of her heritage in her facial features. The way her cheekbones stand out a little more, the shape of her eyes, her full lips; I don't know why I didn't notice it all before. Of course, I really didn't have a reason to think about it before now; it never crossed my mind that she could possibly be part Quileute. I just saw her as beautiful, breath taking, perfect. She looks just as beautiful to me now as she did before I found out about her great-grandmother.

I drop my face down close to hers, hovering my mouth over her sweet lips, and I kiss her softly before pulling away with a huge grin on my face. Her face lights up when she sees my smile. I tug her hand gently, turning us toward the house and through the front door. I try not to think about the significance of this house, saving that for another time. Right now, I need to focus on her.

"That's pretty cool," I half ask, half state when I lead Lillah to her bedroom.

"Yeah, I think so. I mean, I was surprised but it makes sense now that I think about it. My grandmother- you could kind of see it in her. I'll look for some pictures tomorrow, so you can see her."

I smile and bring her closer to me, wrapping my arms around her waist and dipping my head down to kiss the side of her neck. "I'd like that," I whisper against her skin. It's true; I'd like to see the woman that had a hand in making Lillah who she is. It's obvious to me, even without Lillah having told me so herself, that they were close.

"You're tired baby, come on, let's get you into bed, we can talk until you fall asleep."

I watch as Lillah grabs clothes to change into, she disappears into the bathroom where I hear water running. A few minutes later she comes out and I grin at her. She's wearing an over sized t-shirt and from what I can tell, not much else. She climbs into bed with me and I immediately pull her close and kiss her lips. She tastes like toothpaste, minty and sweet. I slide my tongue along her bottom lip before pulling away to look at her, "Tell me more. What all did your mom say about your great-grandmother?"

As she settles against me, she begins to give me the details her mom shared with her, both from what her dad told her mom and what her mom remembered of Ayiana William. It shocks me that even as an infant; Lillah would find peace and comfort being held as she heard our legends. I can imagine baby Lillah being rocked by a little old woman, hearing about the 'wolves'. I'm angry with myself as I realize just how wrong I was two weeks ago. Lillah would never tell our secret, she's kept our secret all her life, whether she knew it or not.

I don't say much, just letting her speak, but slowly her voice begins to soften, her words coming out more slowly before she finally completely drifts off. I hold her close, but for the first time, I'm unable to fall asleep with her.

I lay in bed thinking about what this news could mean. When I imprinted on Lillah I hadn't really thought about the chances of her having ancestors from the Reservation. With her vibrant hair and grey eyes, it just didn't cross my mind or even seem likely. The longer I've waited to tell Lillah she's my imprintee, the harder it's made things for both of us. Last night I dreamed that Lillah knew, that I hadn't even had to tell her I imprinted, she just _knew_ as soon as it happened. We were happy together, we were getting married and I had moved into Lillah's house- the place I'm most comfortable in now; even more so than I was in my own mother's place.

I move to lie on my back, keeping her warm body close to mine. As I rub a hand up and down her back she sighs into my chest. I turn my face just a little, burying my nose into her sweetly scented hair and gather it in my free hand, running my fingers through it gently. I realize, while I'm laying there holding her, I have to tell her. I can't keep it to myself anymore. Even if it means she doesn't love me, even if it means she never could. Whether or not I will have the same mind set when I wake up in the morning that remains to be seen.

-0-

Sliding slowly from the bed I untangle Lillah's limbs from around me, to go to the bathroom, splashing water on my face to wake up. I had turned off the alarm last night, wanting Lillah to be able to sleep in, but I still need to go to work. I walk back out to the bedroom to find Lillah sitting on the side of the bed. She looks so adorable first thing in the morning, but I frown when I see her wipe at her eyes. I move to sit next to her on the bed, resisting the urge to pull her into my lap, "Lillah? Baby what's wrong?"

She gasps then looks at me, smiling, "You're still here."

"Of course I'm still here, where do you think I'd go?" I don't understand why she's so upset. I thought everything was fine when we went to sleep last night. _What changed?_

Lillah shakes her head, not saying anything as she leans over to rest her head on my shoulder. I easily wrap my arm around her, pulling her closer.

"Lills come on, what's wrong?"

She gives a little shake of her head, a laugh coming from her lips, but it's not her normal bubbly sound. This laugh sounds sad, "Nothing, I just thought-, it's stupid, Embry."

I pull back slightly, cupping her face. I can see tears in her eyes again which makes me worry even more, "Please, Lillah, whatever it is, tell me, let me fix it."

"I thought you had left," Lillah says softly then looks down, breaking our eye contact as she whispers, "I thought I might have scared you away. Telling you about being part Quileute, I mean."

"Lillah, you can't scare me away," I lean forward, brushing my lips over her eyes to wipe away the tears. I tilt her head back, smiling as I speak, "I'm still a 'Lillah man'. I like all of you, including the part of you that is like me, that is Quileute."

She still looks hesitant as she speaks, "Are you sure?"  
_  
I should tell her._ As I fell asleep last night I dreamed of how it would be when I told her. But I can't now, not like this when I need to run off to work. I want it to be the right time, when I can be here for her, not tell her and leave. More than anything I want to tell her and then, hopefully, _finally_, make love to her. I would definitely need more than twenty minutes for that. More like a few days completely alone to worship her body and satisfy both of us a few times. _Scratch that. More than a few times._ More like a few times every hour of the day for the rest of our lives.

"I'm absolutely positive baby." I smile, hoping to comfort her. She returns my smile, sliding her lips over mine briefly.

Feeling the need to ease the tension, I wink at her, "You really are part of the family now."

"I guess I am," she grins wide then frowns. She darts her eyes to mine, her sudden worry evident, "Embry, you don't think we are- related, do you?"

I bark out a laugh at her concern about my heritage, "If we are, it's distant enough that I'm not worried about kissing you, or doing more than kissing you. You know this means you are somehow Quil's cousin now, right? And Jacob's, since they are second cousins."

She shrugs, grinning, "That's fine, I don't want to kiss them. Claire and Ness might freak out then, and I like both of them."

"I'd be more worried about me. I don't like the idea of you kissing Jacob, Quil, or any other man," I growl out. While I can't be completely honest with her, I feel like I need to start explaining how I really feel about her.

"Don't worry, Embry. I won't be kissing any of them," Lillah blushes but grins, "I like kissing you too much."

I grin, brushing my lips against hers briefly, "I like kissing you too, but I need to get to work."

"You have to work today?" Lillah looks sad at this idea, which breaks my heart.

"I wish I could stay, but Saturday's are usually our busiest day, especially in the morning. I'll see you tonight, though," I try to comfort her, then grin widely, "and we have all day tomorrow. I'll even ask Jacob tonight about skipping patrols."

Lillah shakes her head, frowning, "Oh no, Embry, don't do that just for me."

"I'm not; I'm doing it for me. I'm a selfish ass, I want to spend all day with you," my grin is wide as I think about all the things we could do together.

She's giggling again the bubbly sound I love listening to, "Ok, in that case I should probably get everything done around here today while you work. Plus, I have a dish to make for tonight."

"Dish? What are you making?"

Lillah grins, "It's a surprise, now go to work."

I give her one last kiss, before turning to leave.

I feel like a fool for how excited I am for tonight and the possibilities for tomorrow. When I phase I can sense Jared patrolling. He mentally rolls his eyes at me then throws images back at me of Kim's old notebooks with hearts and his name all over it. _I get it, I'm an idiot. _For the first time, I feel kind of ok with it.

-0-

"Go home, Embry."

Jacob and I have been patrolling for about an hour, but his sudden command surprises me, "Why?"

He doesn't respond, instead phasing back to human form and pulling on his clothes, "We need to talk man."

"What now?" I ask as I phase back, tugging on my jeans.

"Embry you have got to get your thoughts under control. I like Lillah and all, but now that she is technically a cousin of mine, I really don't want to see her like you do."

"I don't want you to see her that way," I mumble, leaning against a tree.

Jacob shakes his head, "Man, I know you are still working through this, but what if you are causing more damage by being so stubborn and not accepting her?"

"Trust me, I've thought of that. Even if there is a possibility she could love me, she'll be furious when she finds out I kept this from her," after last night I knew I needed to tell her. But something keeps stopping me, somehow I feel like she isn't ready, I'm not ready. We've barely known each other two weeks and really only had the last week to get to know each other. As much as it feels like I've known her all my life, learning about her heritage last night showed me there is still more I need to know about her.

"No crap she'll be furious, because she loves you. Are you still calling yourselves 'friends'?" Jacob barks out a laugh as he does air quotes.

His laughter irritates me, "You got a better definition?"

"Well you definitely aren't lovers, but you are practically living at her house. Roommates?" Jacob continues laughing at his lame joke.

"More like bed-mates, but no. I'm not living with her, I just- have dinner with her every night and share her bed until I go-." Jacob doubles over he's laughing so hard, "Just shut the fuck up. I get your point."

"You two are like high school boyfriend and girlfriend or some shit. It's cute, really, the angst and sexual tension."

_Girlfriend._ "Lillah is a friend, though she's definitely not a girl," I trail off as the word floats around my head a few times. Looking back up at Jacob, I realize what else he said, "Angst? I mean, I'll give you sexual tension, but I don't see angst."

"Have you listened to any of your thoughts? 'She can't love me.' 'She'll never want to be with me.' 'She's mine.' 'I miss her.' 'I need her.' 'What if she does love me?' 'I hope she loves me.' 'I can't love her.' 'But I imprinted.' 'She really is perfect for me.' On and on and on. It's pathetic. Just fucking tell her."

My teeth grind on their own hearing Jacob echo my thoughts, "I can't, not yet."

Jacob shakes his head, "You are so fucking stubborn. Fine, if you won't tell her, at least take her on a date; see if she actually likes you. I assume she does if she shares her bed with you every night, but maybe her feet just get cold at night and she likes for you to warm them up."

"Damnit, Jake, don't you dare talk about Lillah-."

He cuts me off before I launch into a full tirade, "Like I said, angst. Go home."

I huff, but know Jacob is right. "Friends" doesn't cover Lillah and me. It never has. "Fine. Say I make tonight a 'date' with Lillah. How is it different than if we go as friends?"

"Well you could start by cleaning yourself up, something other than jeans and a t-shirt. Maybe shave?"

I shake my head, "Lillah told me the other day she likes stubble."

"Whatever," Jacob rolls his eyes, "no shaving. How about you actually show up at her house in your truck instead of phasing and sneaking in all the time?"

"I was trying to protect her reputation," I explain. "I didn't want her neighbors seeing my truck there all the time."

"Protect her reputation by making her feel like you don't want anyone to know you two are together?" Jacob crosses his arm, almost like an over-protective big brother.

Shaking my head, I laugh, "That's not what I meant and you know it."

"Yes, but I also know how girls think, two older sisters, remember? A guy sneaking around to see them means they aren't worthy of being seen with the guy."

Frustrated, I sink to the ground, "Well shit, that's not it at all."

"Look, tonight is all about her, a chance for the pack to get to know her. Why don't you make her feel special right from the start? Clean yourself up, take her some flowers or chocolate or whatever shit she likes, and be her _date_ for the evening."

I stand up, nodding slowly. I start to walk away, ready to phase when a thought hits me. I turn back to Jacob, grinning, "So is Ness going to be your date tonight?"

"Not yet. Remember, eighteen is the magical number. Then she can be my date, as long as she agrees," Jacob shrugs and I suddenly feel bad for the guy. As much as I didn't want to imprint, at least Lillah is an adult, I don't have to make deals with her parents to see her like I want to.

"That sucks man."

Jacob shrugs, "It's life, less than a year now. I don't know how Quil will survive ten more years."

"Fuck that sucks."

"Yep. I'll see you later," Jacob lifts his hand in the air before phasing and running off.

I phase, running back to my place to get ready, deciding for once to take Jacob's advice. _This had better fucking work._

-0-

I'm nervous as I ring the doorbell at Lillah's house._ I've never had to ring the doorbell. _Even the first night I came here Angela was walking out as I approached. I try to calm myself down as I hear her approaching. When she opens the door she looks puzzled, but she's smiling, "Embry, why are you ringing the doorbell?"

"Since you are the reason for this party tonight, I figured I could escort you. You know, be your date," I manage to choke out. My heart pounds waiting for her response.

"My date?" Lillah grins at me. "I would love that."

"Really?" I can't help but be surprised at how excited she looks. She's practically beaming.

"Yes, really."

I try to swallow but my throat is dry. I don't know why I'm suddenly so nervous. She looks beautiful, even dressed simply, casually. Her face is glowing pink. It gives me a bit of confidence back when I see her nervously wet her lips with her tongue.

"Are you ready to go?"

"Sure, just let me grab my stuff. I'll be right back."

I watch as she walks to the kitchen, her hips swaying gently, teasing me. _God, I love her ass_. I shake my head and try to look innocent when Lillah walks back out to me. I take the dish from her and lead her outside. She seems surprised when she sees my truck in the driveway as we step off the front porch.

"What? I told you I'm going to be your date. You didn't think I'd put you on my back and run to Sam and Emily's, did you?" I wink at her and then grin when I see her reaction is to blush red. I open the passenger door and help her in before walking around to the driver's side. When I climb in I notice Lillah is watching me closely and I ask her, "What?"

She grins and shakes her head, "I've never seen you in 'real' clothes."

"Yeah, uh, I guess you really haven't. Except at the diner and the football game."

"But those don't count, you look nice," she blushes again. "Not that you don't usually look nice. This is different."

"Good different?"

"Just different, Embry. I like you in jeans and a t-shirt though, if that tells you anything."

I smirk at her and nod my head. I understand what she's trying to say.

I place the dish she brought behind the seat. Once it's secure I grab the flowers I hid earlier and turn to her. Her eyes grow wide, as she glances up at me then down at the flowers a couple of times before her eyes settle on the flowers. Her voice is low and shaky when she speaks, "Lilies."

"I just figured I should do this 'date' right, including bringing you flowers. The color reminded me of when you blush," I admit. I probably shouldn't have said that but I'm unable to stop myself, feeling like I need to explain.

Lillah is quiet, not saying anything, just continuing to look at the flowers. Her silence makes me nervous. _This was a bad idea._ She's obviously not interested in going on a date with me. "Lillah I'm sorry, I didn't mean to put you-."

"I love them, Embry," Lillah's soft voice interrupts me then sets my heart to pounding again. She slides across the seat, cupping her hands around my cheeks. This close I can see the tears welling up in her eyes, but I barely have time to focus on them before she brushes her lips across mine. Lillah whispers softly in the quiet cab of the truck, "Thank you.

I exhale the breath I didn't realize I was holding, returning her kisses, "You're welcome."

Lillah pulls back from me but grabs my free hand. She tucks herself under my arm, the flowers resting in her lap while her fingers play with mine.

I back out of her driveway, trying to focus on driving instead of her playing with my fingers. Especially where she has placed my hand; right in between her lush breasts. She slides her hand from mine, pulling the flowers to her nose before resting her head against my shoulder and placing her hands on my thigh. Unable to stop myself, I let my fingers brush over the top of her breasts as I whisper, "I like this top, Lillah, but you are going to be distracting me all night with these things peeking out, teasing me."

Lillah moves one hand from my thigh to brush over my chest, down my stomach, "I know the feeling, that shirt fits you very nicely."

I manage to get us to Sam and Emily's place without starting anything, but when I stop the truck in front of their house I pull her into my lap, needing to touch her. I cup her cheeks, kissing all over her face until I finally reach her lips. As I distract her with my lips, my fingers slide over her neck and down her chest. Just as I'm about to find the top of her glorious breasts someone starts pounding on the window of my truck.

"The windows are all foggy, what are you doing in there, Embry?" I pull back from Lillah, deciding I need to punch Jared.

"Come on, Embry, you have to share the guest of honor," change that, I'm going to punch Jacob, and Jared…in the nuts.

"Really man? In the truck? Isn't that a little uncomfortable?" Paul is going to die.

"Is he hiding my new Cuz in there? Let her out, Embry. We know you bite, but we don't," all four of them howl in laughter at Quil's joke.

I crack open the window so I can peer out at the idiots circling the truck, "Shut the fuck up and go inside. We'll be there in a minute."

I don't speak until I hear everyone walk away. Turning back to Lillah I give her a sheepish grin, "Sorry about that. I plan on killing them later, but I guess making out in the truck isn't proper date etiquette, huh?"

"No killing, Embry." Lillah looks serious then smiles softly, "Probably not proper etiquette, but that's ok. I- I like our date so far." Lillah's face is pink, but she grins before returning her lips to mine. This is a slow kiss since we both know we need to get inside.

Releasing her lips, I close my eyes, resting my forehead against hers, "I guess I have to share you now?"

"I guess. I take it everyone knows by now about me being part-?"

Lillah doesn't finish her sentence but I grin, "If Quil knows, everyone knows, he gossips like a little girl."

"Ok, I can do this. It won't be bad, right? I'm still here to meet your wolf family, not because now I know I'm related to some of them," Lillah looks nervous as she says this.

I open the door, sliding out of the truck and pulling Lillah to me, holding her close, "It will be fine. They all like you already. Not because you are related but because of how wonderful you are." I kiss her neck, whispering, "Technically, you are here to meet _our_ family, my wolf family and your relatives."

My heart pounds in my chest at how right it feels to say 'our family'. No matter how much I fight this, I can't deny how perfect Lillah really is for me. In just two short weeks she has become my life. She isn't just a part of my wolf family; she is my center.

I can feel her heart pounding too which gives me just a little more hope. _Maybe. Maybe she really could love me someday._ I step back, grinning, trying to hide how excited I am to show her off to my friends. Lillah grabs her purse and camera bag then wraps her hand in mine, sliding out of the truck. I reach back to grab her dish then slam the door. Lillah smiles up at me, blushing slightly, "Ok, let's do this, but you'll stay close, right?"

"Don't worry, I won't let Quil get handsy when he hugs you," I wink then kiss her cheek before leading her toward the house.

"He wouldn't, would he? Quil I mean. Isn't he imprinted on Claire?"

Lillah barely finishes asking her question before the idiot comes running out of the house. Quil wraps his arms around her, hugging her tight. I step forward, growling low, warning him. He steps back and laughs, "What's your problem, Embry? I'm just hugging my long-lost cousin."

"You're hugging my _date_. Hands off, Quil," I speak through clenched teeth. I know Quil is just trying to piss me off, but it's working too well.

Lillah squeezes my hand, smiling as she steps closer to me again, "It's ok, Embry. Hi Quil. So, cousins, huh?"

He grins at Lillah, which just makes me want to punch him more, "Yep, cousins. Probably like fourth or fifth cousins, but who's counting? Wanna be kissing cousins?"

"Quil, shut up or I might-" I growl out.

Lillah squeezes my hand, "I don't think so, Quil. I'm pretty sure she wouldn't like that," she points toward the house. I look up to see Claire pushing open the screen door and running off the porch.

"Miss Lillah!" Claire hugs Lillah then turns to me, her hands on her little hips, "Uncle Bry, you be nice to my Quily!"

I try not to laugh but shrug, "I am being nice, your Quily wanted to kiss Miss Lillah."

Claire turns to Quil, huffing and saying in a 'duh' tone only an eight-year-old could use, "Quil, you can't kiss Miss Lillah, only Uncle Bry can."

I grab Lillah's hand as she giggles, pulling her into the house. Quil shouts back as we walk in, "Classy, Embry, getting me in trouble with Claire. I'll get you back! See you later Cuz!"

The house is stuffed with wolves and imprintees everywhere. Kim and Rachel are sitting on the floor of the living room playing with Eli while Jared and Paul sit on fold out chairs watching them, laughing as they toss back a few beers. Jacob and Ness are sitting on the love seat, talking, Ness explaining something to Jacob with her hands as he laughs along with her. Old Quil and Sue are sitting on the couch, talking with Billy who is sitting next to them. A few of the other guys are sitting around a card table with their imprintees in their laps. Seth is sitting with them but jumps up when we walk in.

"Embry! You finally climbed out of the truck, huh? Luckily you aren't the last one here; Leah had to run to work to set a few things up for later. Hey Lillah," Seth grins as her turns to Lillah, "I'm Seth Clearwater."

Lillah releases my hand to shake Seth's, "Hi Seth, nice to meet you finally."

"You too, especially after all I've 'heard' about you from Embry. He can't keep his mind shut when it comes to you." Seth grins then grabs the dish out of my hand before turning to Lillah, "Kitchen? Refrigerator?"

Lillah's heart is racing but she nods at Seth, "Yeah, refrigerator, I'll be there in a few minutes to help."

"Take your time, Emily has it under control," Seth waves as he dashes around the corner for the kitchen.

Lillah turns to me, her cheeks flushed again, whispering, "You think about me during patrols?"

"He more than thinks about you, he annoys the hell out of me with his incessant blah, blah, blahing. I thought Seth was a talker, Embry here has him beat by a long shot when it comes to you." Jacob smirks at me before hugging Lillah, "Good to see you again, Lillah. Thanks for coming."

"Oh, thanks Jacob. It's good to see you again too." She hugs him then looks at me with worry in her eye, "You shouldn't do that, Embry. I don't want you to get in trouble."

Jacob laughs, "Don't worry, Lillah, he's not in trouble, but he is annoying. Why do you put up with him?"

"Jacob, be nice!" Ness walks around him, grinning before hugging Lillah, "Hi! It's so good to see you again."

"You too! We missed you the other night at the planning party," Lillah grins.

Ness sighs, stepping back, "I wish I could have joined, Dad is a little anal about my school work."

"It's ok, school work is important, another time," Lillah beams. It makes me feel good to know she is so accepting of Ness and vice-versa.

"Lillah!" Rachel and Kim join our little group, hugging Lillah tight and giggling like teenage girls.

Kim whispers to Lillah, "Did Embry tell you? It's official. In about eight months I'll have one of those," Kim points to Jared holding Eli.

Lillah narrows her eyes at me, "No! Embry, why didn't you tell me?"

"Sorry, we had other things to worry about that day, like your Mom," I whisper against her ear, causing her to blush.

"Oh yeah, that." Lillah winks at me then hugs Kim again, "Congratulations! You are going to be a great mom."

Kim hugs her back, whispering, "Thanks, Lillah. It doesn't feel real just yet."

"Alright, that's enough hogging the guest of honor, Kim. Come on girls, let's go help Emily," Rachel grabs Kim and Ness' hands as Kim reaches for Lillah's hand, dragging her along with the girls. Lillah looks surprised but smiles, waving at me as they go into the kitchen.

"I need a beer."

"Date going that well?" Jacob laughs, pointing to the porch, "In the cooler, grab me one too?"

"Sure, anyone else?" I hear Paul and Jared ask for one too as I'm outside. Carrying five bottles in I hand one to Paul, Jared, and Jacob and sit down on the couch next to Sue.

Sue smiles at me, "Who's the extra beer for, Embry?"

"Me," Sam's deep voice rumbles as he walks in, carrying the steaks and chicken from the grill. He pauses, starring at Paul, "Paul, don't you dare give Eli a sip of your beer. You know Emily will have my hide. No wonder Rachel keeps putting your wedding off."

Paul smirks, sitting back, "Not for long."

Sam nods, "Announcement over dinner?"

"Yep."

Sam nods the turns to Sue, "Watch him."

I glance over at Paul, smiling but a little anxious as I speak, "So, I'm assuming there's a date now for the wedding? Uh, any chance I could petition for Lillah to be included?"

Paul barks out a laugh, "Oh you are so going to accept her. I can see you giving in. Don't worry no need to petition. Rachel informed me the other night I'm to ask you, Sam, Jared, and Jacob to be in the wedding."

That silly grin is back on my face when I look over at Paul, "Really? Lillah's going to be in the wedding?"

Sam grabs his beer as he walks back in from the kitchen, sitting down in the seat Ness vacated, "Paul's right, you're a goner. Who wants to bet on how long it takes before Embry accepts Lillah? Who ever is closest to the date without out going over."

Paul pulls his wallet out, tossing some bills on the coffee table, "Five dollars says he doesn't make it another week."

Jared laughs, setting Eli on the floor to play before putting some money on the table, "No way, I say he tells her by the end of tonight."

"I say it takes him another month at least," Billy chuckles as he also tosses some money on the table.

"What are we betting on?" Seth and Quil walk in, Claire in tow.

Sam shakes his head, turning to Claire, "Claire, the girls are all in the kitchen with Aunt Emmy."

"Ok, Uncle Sam," Claire hugs Quil then skips off toward the kitchen.

"So the bet?" Quil asks, grabbing a fold out chair.

Sam grins at me, "How long will it take before Embry accepts Lillah?"

"Oh, I'm in on that," Quil laughs, "I say two weeks."

Jacob stares at me then tosses some money in, "It's a tough call, he's stubborn, but she is weakening him. I mean, look at him; he's on a date tonight. I'm going with six days."

"Seth, don't you dare bet on this," Sue narrows her eyes at him before getting up, "I'm going to go check on the girls. Hopefully Leah gets here soon."

Seth waits for his mom to go into the other room then tosses some money in, "Six weeks. He's really stubborn, at least, that's what Leah has told me."

"I agree with Billy here, a month," Old Quil speaks in his papery thin voice.

The other guys place their bets then Sam grabs all the money and puts it in a box on the coffee table along with a slip of paper, "I say three weeks. I think Embry is very stubborn but I also think Lillah can be persuasive."

Everyone turns to look at me, expectantly, "I hate every single one of you."

The room erupts in laughter, even Eli joining in. _Traitor_. When I glance at him he's grabbed one of Claire's Barbie dolls and has it in his mouth, "Dude, playing with a girl's toy? Not cool."

"Come here big guy, let Daddy help you," Sam reaches for a giggling Eli. Once Eli is settled on his lap Sam turns back to me, smiling, "Come on, Embry, you know it's going to happen. Especially now that we know she's actually part of the family, there's no reason for you not to tell her."

I don't respond, finishing off my beer instead. Old Quil speaks softly, but everyone listens intently, "The spirits will tell Embry when she is ready to hear the truth. She is a lovely woman, Embry. Reminds me a lot of my Aunt Ayiana. It's good to have Ayiana's family back in our tribe. She is a strong woman just like her great-grandmother."

Unable to respond to Old Quil, I bend my head lower. Thankfully the girls coming back into the living room distracts all of us. Sue announces that Leah is nearly here if we want to start getting our plates ready. Billy, Old Quil, and Sue head for the kitchen as Lillah snakes her way through the crowded living room. I stand up, pulling her close, "How are the girls?"

"Fine, dinner looks delicious, Rachel made zucchini bread that I am dying to try, but I'll need to run for a week to work it off," Lillah sighs against my chest.

Leaning forward I kiss the top of her head, "Or you could just not worry about it and have a small bite, I'll eat what you don't."

Lillah smiles sweetly, wrapping her arms around me. I hear a clicking sound behind me, turning my head to find Rachel pointing a camera at Lillah and I.

"Rachel, what are you doing?" I snicker, looking at her questioningly. I've never seen Rachel with a camera before.

"We need to document our family. This is Lillah's camera, but she can't exactly be taking pictures all night, she's the guest of honor. So I volunteered." Rachel winks at Lillah, snapping another picture, "Or I stole the camera out of Lillah's hands and told her she wasn't allowed to be behind the camera tonight. Whatever. Smile!"

I look down at Lillah to make sure she's ok with this. When I see her smile as she shakes her head, I know she's fine, "Alright, just make sure you take _clean_ pictures of you and Paul."

Rachel wiggles here eyebrows before walking off, hopefully to bother someone else. I take a step back, ready to escort Lillah into the kitchen when I hear the front door open. I turn around to see Leah walk in. She grins when she spots me, "Embry! I've missed you! Patrols are so boring without you."

Leah walks over and gives me a hug, which is odd. _She's never hugged me before._ She whispers against my ear softly, "Jake texted me, I've got five says it happens tonight."

_Fuck. Me._ I turn to find Lillah now sitting down, her face pale as a ghost. Leah grins at me then extends her hand to Lillah, "You must be Lillah, Embry's told me a lot about you while we were patrolling together. It's nice to finally meet you."

"He told you about me?" Lillah stands, looking at me as she briefly shakes Leah's hand, "Funny, he never mentioned anything to me about you." There is a little bit of bite to Lillah's words and I'm surprised.

Leah shrugs her shoulders and laughs, "Weird. Alright, let's get this party started. Lillah, welcome to the family!"

Leah briefly hugs Lillah then steps back, brushing her hand over my shoulder in what I can only describe as a creepy-ass way, "Good to see you again, Embry."

The room empties quickly as everyone heads for the kitchen. I lean down next to Lillah, who has now sat down again, speaking softly, "Lills? You ok?"

"I'll be fine. I just need some air. I'll be right back," Lillah stands up, her back straight as she walks out the front door.

"Embry?" I look up to see Emily still in the living room, "You need to go talk to her."

"What the hell just happened?" I'm so confused. One minute Lillah and I are fine, the next she's walking out.

"Lillah is jealous of Leah, and probably intimidated by her." Emily smiles softly then says again, "You need to go talk to her."

I stand up quickly, following Lillah's path out the door. I find her leaning against my truck, one cheek resting against the cool metal. Whispering so as not to scare her, I walk up slowly, "Lillah?"

She turns around and there are tears in her eyes. Unable to stop myself I pull her to me, kissing the top of her head, "Lills, please. What's wrong?"

Lillah pulls away from me and starts pacing the length of the truck. She doesn't say anything but her heart is pounding. Finally she stops, turning to look at me. Her tears have stopped but her jaw is set as she speaks, "Did you ever sleep with her, Embry?"

To say I'm stunned is an understatement. Blown away would be more accurate. I barely prevent myself from laughing at the absurdity of the question, "Who? Leah? Hell no! We are just friends."

Lillah's face goes even whiter, if that's possible, "Like you and I are friends?"

"Shit! No! That's not what I meant, baby." I grab her as she walks past me again, pulling her to me as I try to explain, "Lillah, I've never- you are the only- it's not like that with Leah. She's practically one of the guys."

Lillah moves out of my arms and starts pacing again, "That was more than just a friendly hug in there, Embry. I mean, she's- more beautiful than I could ever dream of being. I wouldn't blame you."

I exhale, knowing this isn't good, "Lillah, I promise you, I've never even hugged Leah before tonight. She was up to something, trying to make you jealous."

Lillah laughs hysterically, "Embry, are you kidding me? Leah? Did you see her? Why would she want to make me jealous, Embry? I can't hold a candle to her."

"Lillah, I don't know what Leah was up to," another lie, but for now, I can't let her know what's going on. "I have seen her, Lillah. To me, she can't hold a candle to you."

Lillah stops her pacing, turning to look at me like I'm crazy, "Are you kidding me?"

I use the opportunity of her stopping to pull her to me again. I hold her tight for a moment before explaining, "Lillah, I see Leah just like I see Rachel; I grew up with them. I was never close friends with either of them, but they were always around. As soon as Sam started dating Leah, everyone knew it was hands off."

"Ok, but Embry, you patrolled with her every night. How could you not sleep with her?"

I exhale, knowing I have to at least be honest about this, "Look, Lillah, I had sex with women before I met you. I can't change that, but I promise you, I've never been interested in any woman here on the Rez, especially none of the imprintees and definitely not Leah."

"Embry, come on, it's just- she's gorgeous! Tall, all legs, wearing those killer boots and short skirt. How could you ever be interested in me-,"

"Don't you dare finish that sentence," I growl out. I lift Lillah up to sit on the hood of the truck, our eyes nearly even now. "I'm on a date with you right now, not Leah. I think about you constantly when we aren't together. When Leah and I would patrol we could go for days without saying anything to one another, which was fine by me. I haven't seen Leah in over a week. If I don't see you for a day I have nightmares about vampires chasing you in the forest as you run. Leah might have long legs but it's your legs I dream about having wrapped around me. I honestly didn't even notice what she was wearing, but now that you mention it, I'd love to see you in killer boots and a short skirt. Preferably with no panties on."

Lillah gasps, her cheeks rosy pink again, "Embry!" But she's smiling again, so I relax a little, resting my head on her shoulder. She whispers out low, "I want to believe you, Embry. But, haven't you seen her naked. I mean, with the phasing?"

"I've seen her naked, I've seen all the guys naked, none of that has an impact on me. But you naked sends me over the edge, you are all that I want, Lillah." I've probably told her too much. If she didn't think it was 'impossible' that I could imprint on her, she could easily figure out what's happened based on what I've told her. A small part of me wishes she would realize it one day, but for now, I'm going to keep telling her as much of the truth as I can.

"You really don't see her like that?" Lillah turns her face, moving her cheek against mine.

I lift my head, kissing her gently, "Nope. Just you."

"Huh. You're weird, Embry Call." Lillah smiles, kissing my softly.

"Why am I weird?" I nuzzle her neck, smiling when she begins relaxing again.

Lillah shrugs, "Any other red-blooded man, and probably a few women, would be all over Leah."

"Right, any other _man_, but I'm not any man, Lillah. At least, I'm not just a man." I exhale slowly, confessing a little more to her, "Ask any of the men in that house, even Sam who used to date her, and they will tell you the same thing. Leah just isn't on any of our radars."

"Ok, but Embry, you have to admit, she's beyond gorgeous," Lillah moves to the edge of the hood of the truck.

I help her to slowly slide down my body. When she hovers over my cock, I push back until she is against the truck, my erection evident to her. She sighs, wrapping her arms around my neck and her legs around my hips. I hold her hips tight as I whisper against her ear, "Other guys might think that, but you are the only one that does this to me."

Lillah sinks her fingers in my hair, pulling me to her lips. A few moments later she pulls back, gasping against my lips, "I like doing that to you, because you make me feel the same way. You're the only one that has ever made me feel like this."

"You don't know how happy it makes me to hear you say that," I growl out against her neck.

"Come on, let's go eat," I sigh, letting her body slide the rest of the way down, until her feet touch the ground.

She holds on tight to my hand as we rejoin the group for dinner.

-0-

When we walk into the kitchen Lillah and I both start laughing as we see everyone sitting around the now infamous dinner table at Sam and Emily's. Lillah turns bright pink and I automatically know she's remembering Tuesday night. I lean over and whisper to her, "If it makes you feel any better, Paul is pissed that we got to the pool table before he and Rachel did."

Paul looks up, grumbling, "You bet your ass I'm pissed. You ruined my game."

This brings on even more blushing but also some giggles from Lillah. I bark over my shoulder as Lillah and I fill our plates, "You had no game to begin with."

Everyone is laughing as Lillah and I take our seats. I glance down at the end of the table to see Emily feeding Eli a bottle. He catches my eyes and grins around the nipple. I chuckle under my breath, playing along with Eli, starring him down. This is a game we started playing soon after he was born and now he's an expert, just like his Dad, at being able to hold your gaze until you flinch and look away. Emily realizes what we are up to and huffs, which causes Sam to catch on. He chuckles, alerting the other guys. Sam leans down and whispers to Eli, "Be strong buddy, you can take him. He's weak."

Paul and Jared start chanting, "Eli! Eli!"

I don't break our connection but I see a hand flash in front of my face. Then I hear Lillah next to me, whispering, "Embry, what are you doing?"

When I don't respond, Lillah leans forward, partially blocking my view of Eli. I look around her, refusing to quit, "Baby, don't block, I think I've almost got him!"

"Yes, because he's about to fall asleep, Embry! Are you really starring down a baby?" Lillah huffs, sounding just like Emily all of a sudden.

Emily jumps in, of course, "Thank you, Lillah. This is a stupid game you guys play with him. Embry, you're the worst."

I want to roll my eyes at the two of them, but instead keep my eyes locked on Eli, "It's not a stupid game. If he falls asleep I win, but he's crafty, he makes you think he's going to fall asleep and then you lose concentration and he wins!"

I hear Lillah sigh, but a small laugh follows, "I doubt he's that advanced, Embry. You do not _win_ if he falls asleep. At least, you don't 'win' with me."

It takes everything in me not to glance over at Lillah, but I manage to hold my gaze with Eli. He is giggling, clapping his hands on his bottle as he continues to stare at me.

I feel Lillah lean closer, her lips just below my ear as she whispers, "If you let him win, you get a prize."

"Whose side are you on, Lillah?" My fists are clenched tight, fighting my need to look at her, to respond to her lips.

Lillah's hand slides over my cheek, pulling until I give in, breaking my eye contact with Eli. Her eyes are sparkling with laughter when I turn to her. I can hear the guys laughing and Eli giggling, while the girls sigh in irritation. Lillah shakes her head then kisses the corner of my mouth, "I'm always on your side, Embry. Now eat."

_I'm always on your side, Embry._ My heart pounds in my chest at her words. I never in my life thought I'd ever hear anyone say that to me. I was content being the only one watching out for me, but now I know I need Lillah there for me, to support me, always.

Lillah wraps her hand around mine, smiling up at me before turning to speak with Seth. Paul catches my eye and mouths "Fucking accept her already."

Rather than respond, I flip him off with my free hand before grabbing my fork and digging in.

Dinner is a loud, boisterous ordeal with everyone talking over everyone. I try to make sure Lillah eats, but she keeps getting distracted by people wanting her attention.

Halfway through dinner Paul and Rachel 'officially' announce that they will be getting married at the next bonfire, three weeks from today. Lillah is shocked, leaning over and whispering to me, "Is she pregnant?"

"No, but he wants her pregnant sooner rather than later," I whisper back. My mind drifts off to thoughts of getting Lillah pregnant. _It's like an epidemic._

She smiles sadly, "There will be a lot of babies around here soon. It will be crazy."

"Yeah, but that's how we like it," I smile back at her, kissing her cheek.

Rachel also 'officially' asks Lillah to be a bridesmaid. Lillah tears up in her excitement and bursts out, 'Yes, yes, yes," which causes everyone to laugh around the table.

Once everything calms down, Lillah is able to set a date with Billy for for her class to come out to the Reservation to talk to Billy about the legends. They agree on a week from Tuesday, short timing, but apparently Lillah already had permission slips for field trips signed at the beginning of the year. She just needed to schedule the day and time.

Toward the end of dinner Lillah is also able to talk to Old Quil about her Great-Grandmother. He tells her stories about Ayiana William that make me laugh because she sounds so much like Lillah.

Emily announces its bed time for the little ones and takes them upstairs. A few of the other guys, along with Billy, Sue, and Old Quil say their goodbyes. The girls remain at the table, talking about wedding plans while we start working on the dishes. When Emily returns she announces its dessert time, and that Lillah made us a special treat. I glance at her and she is smiling from ear-to-ear, "I hope everyone likes it."

Lillah pulls her dessert out of the little carry thing she brought it in and I nearly cum in my pants. _I am not even kidding._ Whatever it is she is holding in her hands has caramel drizzled all over the top. All I can see in my head is her and that damn sundae she ate at the diner last week. From there, my train of thought jumps to drizzling caramel all over her wickedly lush and sexy body. My tongue licking it off her skin as she writhes beneath me. Over one nipple, then the other, sucking them gently, whisking away the sticky caramel.

I feel an elbow in my ribs, bringing me out of my stupor and causing me to look to my left. Sam is unsuccessfully hiding a shit eating grin, his eyebrows raised. I look around the room and realize everyone is staring at me. On my right, Jacob leans over and, in between snorts of laughter, tells me to stop growling. The other guys are laughing, not even trying to hide their reactions. Emily and Rachel just roll their eyes and turn back to what they are doing. Ness and Lillah have almost matching expressions of confusion. Ness looks at Jacob; he grabs her hand pulling her into the living room. I hear her asking him what set me off then Jacob's bark of laughter followed by a 'nothing'. I let me eyes move back to Lillah and instead of saying anything, I wink and lift my eyebrows playfully, nodding my head at the dessert.

"What'd you bring, Lills?" I ask, trying to put her at ease.

"Mmm, homemade Turtle Cheesecake. It's a combination of two of my favorite things- caramel and cheesecake. You know I love caramel." Lillah winks at me then licks her lips, which drives me wild. My dick is throbbing as she continue, "A little bit sweet, a little bit salty. Mix it with cheesecake and-."

Lillah is a little rambly now, probably because of the many refills of wine Rachel has placed in her hand. I just grin at her and tell her it looks good. _Man does it look good._ I watch as Lillah slices the dessert and puts a few pieces on plates.

Emily tells us to grab our plates and move to the living room. Following her instructions we take our seats around the room. Lillah pauses when I sit on one end of the love seat, but I grab her by the waist, easily pulling her down onto my lap. She tenses up at first but then relaxes a little as I kiss the side of her neck gently. I watch as Lillah lifts a forkful of the cheesecake to her mouth and pulls it off of the fork with her lips. _I sure wish that was something else she had those lips wrapped around-_ I stop myself, frowning at my thought.

Oblivious to my lascivious thoughts Lillah holds the fork up for me to take a bite. The anticipation on her pretty face eases my mind and has me smiling again. I swear that one bite of cheesecake is like heaven. I close my eyes and moan around the fork as she pulls it from my mouth.

"Good?" Lillah giggles and when I open my eyes I notice her skin is a little flushed.

"That was- mmm sinful," I moan. "It's a shame it'll be completely devoured and you won't have any left overs for us later," I lament.

Lillah grins and leans forward to kiss my lips softly before she pulls away and tells me happily, "I made two. There's another whole cheesecake at home."

My heart pounds when Lillah mentions 'home'; not her house, 'home'. What's scary is that's how I feel about her house. It's home to me now. I brush my lips over Lillah's to hide my sudden realization, "You are a mind reader, woman."

"Nope, just selfish. I knew I'd want to eat half of it myself." We both laugh at this and I don't notice that the room has gone silent as we just stare at one another with smiles on our faces. Someone clears their throat and I glance up and see all of the guys, plus Leah, grinning like a pack of idiots. I roll my eyes at their stupid antics. If they keep this up Lillah will begin to wonder what is going on. The last thing I want is for her to find out anything about their idiotic bet.

"You be selfish all you want. I like this side of you, personally. I hope you'll share at least a little bit with me though," my eyes are drawn to the soft skin of her breasts peeking out from her shirt. Without meaning to, I slide one finger over her chest, outlining her breasts.

Lillah hums softly as my fingers touch her skin. Her eyes pop open like she just realized I was speaking to her. "Of course," she tells me with a grin on her face. _God, I adore this woman_.

Quil flops down on the other side of the love seat, grinning wildly at Lillah and I. I just know he's going to drive both Lillah and I, _ok, mostly me,_ crazy all night.

I finally pull my gaze away from Lillah's beautiful face and look around the room. I notice the other guys are sitting with their imprintees in their laps, in various poses. Rachel and Paul are the most obvious about their, erm, love for one another. _It's disgusting_. I look over at Sam and Emily and as if he feels my eyes on him, Sam looks over and grins at me. It's a different look this time. Not so much teasing, more understanding. I nod my head at him and slide my gaze over to Leah. She's sitting in an over-sized chair and as soon as my gaze meets hers she sticks her tongue out at me. _Really mature._ I narrow my eyes at her, hoping she understands that her ass is grass about the little trick she pulled earlier.

I look away from her and over at Kim and Jared. They are sitting in much the same position as Lillah and I. Kim sitting on his lap sideways but Jared has his hands on her stomach. I noticed he's being doing this all evening. I hear someone sigh and glance at Jake and Ness. He's sitting on the floor next to her and I'm struck again by how bad I feel for both of them. It must suck thoroughly, not to be able to touch her, even innocently, to show Ness how much he cares for her. I move Lillah's hair out of the way and kiss the back of her neck gently. She turns her face into my shoulder and I feel her grin against me.

I was never really around for 'family' functions before Lillah, so I never noticed how coupled off everyone was, but my actions make me wonder if the rest of us make Leah, Seth, Jacob, or even Ness, uncomfortable when we are paired off this way. At times, I notice a sad look pass across Ness' face but she always manages to wipe it away quickly. The two of them are sharing a plate of dessert; taking turns eating off of one fork but not doing like the other couples, feeding one another. Ness has her cell phone lying in her lap and it goes off, alerting her to a text. Jacob looks down and I see him frown a little "Edward?"

"No," Ness tells him, shaking her head and tossing the phone on the floor next to her. Her face is a little flushed but there are no other signs of distress.

Jacob looks confused and he glances up at me, his eyes narrowing when Quil asks, "Boyfriend?" I happily punch Quil in the arm and Jacob nods in appreciation.

Movement from the end of the hallway catches my attention and I glance over to see Seth walking back into the room. I hadn't realized he'd left. He distracts all of us by saying "Em, you're out of TP in the bathroom."

"Ew, did you have to do that here?" Rachel asks him, wrinkling her nose.

"You gotta go, you gotta go," Seth shrugs as he wanders off into the kitchen.

"I hope you washed your hands!" Emily calls after him and we all laugh when we hear Seth turn on the water in the kitchen.

Lillah and I finish off our cheesecake and I take the plate from her hand, sitting it on the floor in front of us. She leans back against my chest and I rest my chin on her shoulder, wrapping my arms around her waist. Conversations carry on around us, Lillah talking to the girls and Quil, who is determined to learn everything he can about his new "Cuz". I just listen to Lillah talk, smiling at how comfortable she is with my family. I take one of Lillah's hands in mine, lacing my fingers through hers. I use my other hand to play with her friendship ring, twirling it around her finger. It's easy for me to imagine it's another type of ring, because after tonight, I know this is where Lillah belongs. With this family and with me.

-0-

**A/N:** Oh really, Embry. So now what are you going to do about that? So the little bet the wolves have; one of them selected the correct time. Of course, we won't tell you which wolf, but _feel free to guess_! Don't forget to click that little review button and let us know what you thought! **Are you on Twitter? Let us know and we'll follow you back! We are, of course, StupidLeeches**.


	25. Chapter 25 Getting So Much Clear

**Chapter 25 "Getting So Much Clearer"**

**Disclaimer:** Not Stephenie Meyer. I mean, really, if that isn't clear by this point, we need to talk offline!

**A/N: **Good news/bad news here. Good news, a LOT happens in this chapter. Bad news, we wordy bitches actually managed to keep it under 9K words this time. I know, shocking. Just a reminder, we've added a new feature to our website. If you register (click on "Subscribe" at stupidleeches[dot]com) you can receive all of our updates and teasers via email. Enjoy!

_Today was a fairytale  
You've got a smile that takes me to another planet  
Every move you make everything you say is right  
__Today was a fairytale  
Today was a fairytale  
All that I can say is now it's getting so much clearer  
Nothing made sense until the time I saw your face  
Today was a fairytale_  
"Today Was A Fairytale" - Taylor Swift

**LPOV**

I sigh happily as I lean back against Embry. This has been not only the best date I've ever been on, but probably one of the best days of my life.

_I'm on a date with Embry. _The thought still sends thrills through me. I don't know if it means the same thing to him as it does me, but right now, I don't care. I'm enjoying the moment.

My hands move over his soft shirt, feeling the muscles of his chest that I can see clearly through the navy cotton. When he showed up wearing khaki's and a fitted navy blue long sleeve shirt today, I wanted to grab him by his shirt and drag him into my bedroom. While he's handsome in his jeans and t-shirts, or just jeans, seeing him "dressed up" was a very nice surprise.

Embry has been full of surprises tonight, including being my date and giving me flowers, _lilies_. Most guys would bring carnations, or if they are really generous, roses; no one has ever given me lilies. It's silly, but with my name, I've always loved lilies. Mom tried to grow them every spring but they are such a delicate flower they never survived the Washington state weather.

_How does he always seem to know what I like? _My only answer is he must talk with the girls to get information, but I don't recall ever mentioning my favorite flower to them.

Sitting in the living room I'm reminded of being in Billy's house just two weeks ago with many of these same people. I was scared then, afraid one of them might suddenly turn into what Paul had. I was also scared because of the weird pull I felt toward Embry. The pull I still feel, but now "the pull" is an all consuming need. I need Embry, not just his body, but his soul and spirit. I need to be near him, all the time, which scares me more that any giant wolf ever could.

Embry is playing with my friendship ring as I look around at the other couples in the room. Paul, I notice, is nearly groping Rachel but Sam and Emily are sweetly cuddled together. Sam is spinning Emily's wedding band around her finger and kissing the side of her face. I've noticed he does this often, kissing the scarred side tenderly. The action always makes my heart clench a little. It's so obvious that he loves her deeply but he seems to still harbor guilt over her injuries.

Ness and Jake have polished off their slice of cheesecake and she's turned sideways, leaning her back against Jake's shoulder. I watch him reach up and twirl the ends of her long hair around his fingers and tug playfully. Ness laughs and it makes Jake's face spread into a wide grin. _Poor guy._ It must really be hard for him to keep his imprinting from her. I can only imagine how happy she'll be when he is finally able to tell her. Jake moves like he is going to kiss the crown of her head but pauses, turning back to his conversation with Sam. I turn to look at Embry and he shakes his head.

Rachel, Kim, Emily and I discuss the wedding and make plans to go shopping for dresses this week after school one day. I'm excited to think that Rachel considers me a close enough friend that she wants me to be a part of her very special day. She appears so happy, looking back at Paul every few minutes, a grin on both their faces; I'm thrilled to see her so content. Leah waves a hand in indifference when Rachel asks her to join in on the planning. She tells her she's happy to be at the wedding but doesn't really 'get into that stuff'. Kim teases Rachel about being "next" and I laugh lightly when I realize what she means. Jared has his hands on her stomach, rubbing them in circles. He drops random kisses on her shoulder and whispers in her ear, making her grin and playfully slap him on the thigh. Kim's eyes meet mine and we both laugh and shake our heads. _Men_.

"Hey Embry, want to go ride motorcycles with Ness and I tomorrow?" Jacob grins at Ness who smiles back at him before turning to Embry and me.

Embry looks at me hesitantly, "Up to you. I have plenty of room on the back of my bike for you."

"You have a motorcycle? And a truck?" I narrow my eyes at him, a little stunned to learn this, especially after Embry had a mini-freak out over me having two cars.

Embry shakes his head, grinning, "I have an old truck and an old motorcycle, both of which I rebuilt. You have a rebuilt Camaro and a brand new car. Completely different."

"Sounds like you have two vehicles, mister," I grin at him.

"Fine, I get your point, but you didn't answer my question. Ride motorcycles with Jake and Ness or stick with our original plan of all day alone in your house?" Embry slowly slides his tongue over my shoulder. I'm trying to stay focused but he's already driving me crazy. As much as I want a full day alone with him, I'm suddenly nervous. I won't be able to keep my hands off of him all day, and as much as I want him, I'm scared.

"Ride motorcycles," I manage to choke out.

Embry smiles softly then gives me a little wink, "Chicken, but don't worry, I understand."

I relax back against him as he and Jacob work out the details for tomorrow. As I'm watching, I see Ness glance over at Seth, giving him what looks like an apologetic smile. When I look over at Seth, he's standing up, walking out of the room. _Oh-kay. That was weird._

As Embry and I chat with the others I can't help but notice how loving the wolves are with their imprintees. They are gentle with them, never losing contact but allowing them to relax and carry on amongst themselves. I can't help myself and in a lull of conversation I look over at Leah. She's picking on Seth, who has now returned and is eating some dessert, trying to dodge away from her as she flicks his ear lobe. He's sitting on the floor, his legs stretched out across a large piece of the living room carpet, once again facing Ness. Leah glances up at me, her expression unreadable. I know what Embry told me outside, and I believe him completely, but I don't understand why she would try to make me jealous. I meet her gaze head on, not looking away and finally, she grins, nods slightly and goes back to annoying her brother. _Well, now that _that's_ settled._

We talk for a while longer, the guys teasing one another while we girls laugh at their antics. Ness' phone beeps and she sighs. "Time to go?" Jacob asks her, not trying to hide the disappointment in his voice.

"Yeah, Mom and Dad are back home; they said they have a surprise for me. You know Dad-" Ness' voice trails off as she types out a reply to the text she received. Jake stands and clasps her hands to pull her from the floor. They both move around the room, Jake doing a little hand bump with the guys and Ness hugging all of the ladies. When she moves to me I lean up and hug her tightly, excited that I'll get to see her again tomorrow.

After the two of them leave the rest of us start winding down. I'm getting drowsy, partly from the wine but also because Embry is gently running his fingers up and down my arm. The lazy movements relax me against him and I can't help but let my eyes drift closed. I place my free hand on his thigh, wrapping my fingers around and gently kneading his muscles.

I turn my head and kiss the underside of Embry's jaw, just below his ear. I surprise him by flicking the tip of my tongue against his skin. I giggle when Embry inhales sharply. He's almost always the one teasing me; it's nice to be able to surprise him. He adjusts me on his lap, pulling me closer, my butt pressed against his crotch. I do my best to hide the little shiver that skitters up my spine and across my skin. He always manages to one up me in this department. I move my hips a little, just barely enough so that I'm able to tell he's definitely reacting to me. I lift my head and my eyes meet Emily's; she's smirking at me and I bite down on my bottom lip to keep from laughing. I don't want to draw attention to myself, but I feel comfortable here. Everyone here seems to understand Embry and me, probably more than even I do. I don't feel like I have to hide how he makes me feel. I might not be able to explain the pull I feel but obviously they 'get' what I'm going through.

Embry's tongue against my ear grabs my attention again. He whispers sweetly, "Ready to go home?"

"Only if you are planning on staying with me tonight," I feel my blush, but I'm more concerned about him staying the night than my own embarrassment.

Embry's laugh sounds a little more devilish than normal, "A good date would give you a kiss on the cheek and say goodnight."

"I don't want a kiss on the cheek, I want to fall asleep in your arms," he has sucked my earlobe into his mouth and I bite back my moan.

Embry sighs, dropping a kiss on my jaw before whispering, "I want that too, Lillah."

Embry helps me to stand and we give our goodbyes. I manage to steal my camera back from Rachel, shocked to see she's taken over three hundred pictures tonight, "Did you even focus on anything or were you just randomly taking pictures?"

"I think you'll like what I took, don't worry," Rachel grins, hugging me. "See you Monday."

"Yep, congratulations again. And thank you, for inviting me to be a part of your wedding. It means a lot." I hug her again, my excitement bubbling over, "I can't believe you are getting married in three weeks!"

"Of course you are in my wedding, especially now that we know you are family! I knew we'd be close friends when we first met, but cousins is every better." Rachel winks at me then whispers against my ear, "Embry is also in the wedding, he's a groomsman. _He'll be in a tux. _You might need the next three weeks to prepare yourself for that."

I glance at Embry in his long-sleeve t-shirt and khaki's and nod in agreement with Rachel, "Thanks for the warning, yeah, definitely needed that."

Embry grabs my hand and pulls me out of the house after another round of hugs. He helps me into the truck, secures my now empty dish then climbs in. I snuggle up against him as he drives my flowers again on my lap. I use the preview function on my camera to flip through a couple of pictures from tonight, surprised at how good they turned out. When I come to a picture of Embry and I my heart starts pounding. I flip back over a few pictures, looking at Sam and Emily, Paul and Rachel, and Jared and Kim, and then I go back to the picture of Embry and me.

Embry glances down at the camera when he stops the truck, "Hey! That's a great picture of us, you look amazing. Would you print me off a copy?"

I shake my head in agreement but I'm still looking at the picture in amazement. The way Embry is looking at me in the picture reminds me of how Sam, Paul, and Jared were looking at Emily, Rachel, and Kim in their pictures. He's smiling, one arm around my waist, holding me, his eyes locked on mine. His free hand is holding my right hand, his fingers on my friendship ring. He looks like he can't take his eyes off of me.

What's even more surprising to me is how _I_ look. I'm looking at him, but I'm laughing, a faint blush evident on my skin. The hand of mine that he isn't holding is flat against his chest. I don't know when Rachel took this picture, but I look happy and relaxed, so does Embry. _We look like we are a real couple._

"Lills, you coming?" Embry has the door to the truck open. He's grinning at me and my heart again skips a beat. I put my camera away and grab my flowers before quickly sliding out. He holds my hand as we walk up to the front porch. When I open the door, Embry glances over his shoulder.

"What?"

He looks at me, a hesitant smile on his face, "You sure it's ok me leaving my truck out front? I don't want anyone-."

I cover his lips with my fingers, smiling, "Embry, stop. I want you here. That's all that matters."

His tongue flicks out, sliding over my fingers. I gasp, pulling my hand back as he grins, "Alright, if you're sure."

"I'm sure."

Embry stays with me as I walk through the house. I put my camera and purse down in the hall, kicking my shoes off before moving to the kitchen. I leave the dish in the sink to soak overnight and place my flowers in a vase, setting them on the kitchen table. As I make my way back to the bedroom, Embry steps ahead of me, holding the door open, waiting for me; he closes the door, locking it after I step into the room. Easily, he pulls me against him, "Finally alone."

I close my eyes, resting my head against his chest. I smile remembering the evening, "Thank you. You were a wonderful date tonight, Embry."

"You weren't half bad yourself, Lillah. Go get changed, I'll start warming the bed up," Embry wiggles his eyebrows.

I turn for the bathroom but Embry grabs my hand, turning me around, "Wait, before you go change, there's something I want to do."

"What?"

Embry pulls me toward him, but stops me short of touching him. His hands move to my hips as his head moves to my neck. He moves from my ear, down my neck and across my shoulder, mixing soft kisses, swipes of his tongue and gentle nips with his teeth along the way. He moves across my collar bone and makes the same trail down the other side.

My hands have found his hair as he moves along, gripping it tightly as his name escapes my lips on a moan. He again moves across my collar bone but this time moves lower down my chest, as I feel his hands moving up over my hips. He cups my breasts at the same time that his lips outline the top of them.

I gasp; shocked that he can make me want him so much without removing a single bit of clothing. His hands move along the underside of my breasts, lifting them while his mouth moves over the part exposed by my shirt. Embry speaks softly, "I've been thinking about this all night. May I show you what I wanted to do?"

I whimper my agreement, unable to tell him no now. Embry pulls his mouth from my breasts but his hands move higher. I feel his eyes on me as he whispers, "All night long these have been teasing me. I wanted to free them."

His hands push the fabric of my shirt and my bra aside, easily exposing both breasts; his hands find my nipples, tugging on them. I can hear the noises coming from my mouth but I can't stop myself, he knows just how to touch me. Using my hands in his hair I pull his mouth up to mine. Our lips crash and I lose focus; his hands are now all over my body. Before I know it he's moved us to the bed and he has removed all of my clothes along with most of his.

I'm completely exposed to him but he once again leaves his boxers on. I reach for him through his boxers, needing to make him feel the same way I do even if he won't give up that last bit of control. His hands, tongue and mouth attack me, bringing me pleasure I never thought I could have. My teeth find his shoulder, biting down as he pushes me closer to the edge. As he continues to pleasure me, I reach into his boxers, needing to feel him in my hand as I stroke him. Before I would think it possible, we both find our release together.

Before I can fall asleep, Embry easily picks me up, carrying me to the bathroom to wash up. I pull on my panties again but hesitate. Resolving myself, I walk back out to the bedroom, grabbing his long-sleeved t-shirt from earlier, pulling it over my head. I'm swimming in it but I don't care, it's soft, warm and smells like him. _It's perfect._

Embry laughs softly, pulling me against him as we fall asleep wrapped up in each other.

-0-

The morning dawns bright and I sigh against Embry's chest, enjoying our time; knowing we don't have anywhere we have to be until later today. Embry begins running his hand up and down my back, his voice gruff when he speaks, "Morning, sweet Lillah."

"Good morning," I grin against his hot skin and cuddle closer. "How'd you sleep?"

"Like a rock, but I always sleep that way when I have you next to me," he admits. I understand exactly what he means. I feel the same way; I sleep ok when he's not there but I sleep ten times better when he is. I've slept alone all my life but now that I know what it's like to have someone next to me, to have _him_ next to me, it's an entirely different feeling. "What should we do today?"

"I think," I begin slowly; "we should lay here in bed all morning making out," I tell him matter-of-factly, knowing if I don't just spit it out, it'll never happen. I love Embry's sweetness and the way he respects me, but at times, I wish he'd just stop being so cautious.

Embry inhales deeply as I lift my head to look up at him. "Really?" he asks and I see the surprise on his face. "I don't think I'd have a problem with that."

"I didn't think you would," I tell him with a mischievous smile. I feel the blush on my face, I'm being a little bolder with him but I try to remind myself that he told me he likes knowing what I'm thinking. "I'll be right back," I tell him and crawl out of bed. I go into the bathroom and cringe when I see my hair. I quickly run a brush through it and brush my teeth before taking care of Mother Nature's call. While I'm going about my routine I make a sudden decision and pull my panties off, throwing them into the dirty clothes basket before walking back out. By this point my whole body is flushed, I'm so awkward about this but I keep reminding myself that so far Embry has seemed pretty pleased with everything we've done.

When he sees me exit the bathroom he grins and pulls the blankets back for me to climb in. He immediately pulls me down to him. My body curls against his side and our lips meld together. His tongue slowly dances along my bottom lip and I open my mouth to him. He pulls back and I whimper a little, "You brushed your teeth," he says.

"Um, yes-" I give him a funny look.

"Should I-"

"Embry, shut up," I tell him firmly and press my lips back to his. Our kisses progress slowly. A few pecks here and there, leading into his velvety tongue sliding into my mouth and moving against mine. He has one hand on my hip and the other one is rubbing slow circles along my back, down my spine. Every new circuit brings his hand further down my back until he finally runs it over my butt, squeezing gently then moves back up again. I begin to move my hips against him, the heat between my legs steadily growing. I'm wet already and he's barely touched me. Every time his hand moves back down, I anticipate his reaction when he realizes I'm not wearing panties, but he doesn't venture lower than the curve of my ass.

I maneuver my body so that I'm laying between his legs and press my hips into his. Embry moans into my mouth and I answer with a shuddering gasp when he lifts his pelvis, pressing his hard on into me. He feels so good, so right, against me. I want to ask him to make love to me but I'm afraid to break the spell and have him withdraw from me. I need to take a break and pull my mouth away from his, burying it in his neck, kissing his beautiful skin, nipping at it with my teeth. Every rotation of my hips is met by Embry's, pushing up into me. His hands are gripping my t-shirt, pulling it up a little higher with every movement.

Embry moves his legs until they are between mine, reversing our positions and opening me up to him. _I'd give anything for him to just-_

"Shit, Lillah, what the fuck?" _Oops_. His hands have moved down again and he's realized I'm naked below the waist.

"Well," I stutter a little, "if I recall, I did promise you a prize last night."

Embry's jaw is clenched tight, rippling with tension, "I didn't really expect _that_ kind of prize, baby."

I try to distract him from saying no to me by kissing down his neck and over to his nipple.

"That's not fair, baby," he whines and I chuckle against his skin. He doesn't argue too much, moving his hands down, gripping my thighs and pulling them so I'm straddling him a little higher. I release his skin and gasp, shifting my hips against him. "You're not going to make this easy on me, are you?"

"No," I tell him, grinning down at him. He lifts his hands up to my hair, pushing it over my shoulders.

"Ok, truce. We'll try something new, but you have to be patient because I'm at my wits end," he tells me frankly. I nod my head in understanding, afraid if I argue with him, he'll deny me any kind of pleasure. "You were so sexy last night; beautiful and sweet. I wanted you more than I ever thought I could want someone."

"You can have me Embry, always."

I'm feeling pretty smug and proud of myself, thinking I, for once, have the upper hand and actually am managing to do something right. Instead of inhibiting myself, letting my insecurities take over, I'm giving my body what it wants, and I hope to give Embry what his body wants too. I look down at him and he's inhaling deeply, trying to control himself, it appears. His eyes have gone black and are full of unspeakable things.

"Do I get to choose what this new thing is?"

"I r_eally_ don't think that is a good idea baby."

"Why not? Is the big bad wolf afraid of little ol' me?" I ask, twisting my hips against his. He growls, the sound rumbling deep in his chest and making me giggle. He shakes his head and cups my face in his hands, his thumb running over the curve of my flushed cheek.

"How about you tell me what it is you want and then we'll compromise?"

I sigh and consider his proposition, knowing what I have in mind probably isn't going to fly with him. "I want to touch you," I blurt out, but before he can open his mouth to speak, I continue, "I want to see you. All of you."

Embry's head flops back on the pillow and I can tell he's having a hard time breathing. This could be good or bad. "God. Lillah, are you sure? That's- I just don't want you to feel-"

"To feel what? Awkward? Embarrassed? Too late for that. Been there, done that, all of my life," I tell him. "Except with you, Embry, when I want to feel awkward and embarrassed you somehow make me feel sexy and beautiful. I want to see all of you, Embry, if you are willing to try. I'd rather it be when we are both relaxed and I'm not drunk. I want to remember everything."

Embry's jaw is clenched tight but I see him exhale and nod once. I try to hide my excitement, and nerves, by moving my lips over his. Embry slowly relaxes again before he rolls me over onto my back. When he rolls away from me I want to whine but he gives me a look before speaking, "Just give me a minute."

"I can't believe I'm doing this," Embry grumbles before pulling his hand out from underneath the covers, his boxers in his hand.

My heart pounds in my chest as I realize there are suddenly no barriers between Embry and I. I smile as I look up at him, unable to hide my nervous laughter, "You know most men would love to have a woman begging them to take off their clothes."

"Yeah, well, most men aren't doing their damndest to keep your virginity intact," Embry grumbles as I start pushing the covers lower, exposing his chest. He sighs when I place kisses over his chest, "Just behave Lillah, I'm very close. God this is such a bad idea."

"It's not a bad idea; you are just a control freak, Em. I just want to see you, I promise, I'll behave," I move lower, my tongue circling around his flat belly button. My hand grips the top of the covers and I look up at him, "Ready?"

Embry closes his eyes and nods. I hesitate just a second before throwing the covers back. I watch them land at the foot of the bed and my eyes move to Embry's feet. They are huge, just like the rest of him. My heart is pounding erratically as I slowly move my gaze up his legs. When my eyes reach his thighs I try to prepare myself, remembering I wanted to do this. When my eyes finally fall on him I realize I could never be prepared. _Oh. My. God. _My breath is coming out in short gasps, but I can't take my eyes off of him.

"Lills," Embry pauses and I hear him swallow thickly, "what are you doing?" I glance up at him and he's looking at me with a confused expression. I'm staring at him, or rather, at his erection, studying it with intensity. Feeling and seeing it are two entirely different things, I now know. He feels so good against me when he's like this and I know what he feels like in my hand but seeing him standing proud, his erection protruding from his hips is something new. _Not scary, but definitely intimidating. _

"I'm just, studying," I tell him casually and look away from his stare when I feel the blush cover my neck and face. I try to ignore that he's watching every move, every expression that flits across my face. I lift a hand and reach out, a look of concentration on my face, I'm sure. I take my finger tip and gently poke at him, watching his hard on bounce back into position after I pull my finger away. Embry gasps then moans.

"Huh," I say in fascination before poking it again, this time pressing it a little further and watching it spring back into place after sort of jumping. "Did you do that?" I ask him and he chuckles out a laugh that sounds almost painful. He doesn't answer me and I continue inspecting him.

_Poke poke._ "Why aren't you circumcised?" I ask absently and Embry mutters something about the Rez and traditions and it being a 'white' people thing. I'm too curious about his body's reactions to hear what his answer is. "May I?" I ask, indicating my hand and his penis when I glance up at him. Embry's face looks tense but he nods his head in the affirmative. I scoot a little closer, my knees hitting his thigh. I reach out a hand and wrap my fingers around him, hoping I'm being gentle enough. Embry's hips shoot off of the bed, forcing my hand to move down his shaft before lowering back to the bed.

"Lillah."

"Shh," I tell him before releasing my fingers. Even though I know this is torture for him, having me touch him this way, he moans when I release him. I run the pad of my index finger from his head, down his shaft and back up. Before I can change my mind or Embry can stop me I push up to kneel so that I can swing one of my legs over his thighs. I sit as close as possible without making either of us completely insane. It would be so easy for him to take me like this, for both of us to lose all self control and to make love right now. Embry opens his mouth to speak but I hold a finger in the air, asking him to give me a second. I wrap my fingers around his shaft again but before I begin moving it, I look up and meet his eyes. "You'll tell me if I do anything that you don't like, or that hurts you?" I worry my bottom lip between my teeth.

"You could never do anything I don't like, baby. As for hurting me, I'm in so much pain right now; the only thing you can do is make it better." A shiver runs up my spine and I nod before looking back down. I slowly move my hand up, watching the extra skin being pulled up until it's over the head. _Fascinating_. By looking at him as if he's something I'm studying, it makes it easier for me to relax, and not feel awkward about what I'm doing. My hand glides back down, his head appearing again. _Huh._ Embry hisses and I grin at the familiar sound. At least _some_ of this is familiar. _Now that I can actually see how his body reacts, I want to find other ways to pleasure him._

I tighten my fist around him, bringing my hand up and then down again, adding the smallest pulse of pressure with each pass. I flick my eyes up to look at him, checking that he's ok. When I see that he's watching me closely I quickly drop my face, looking back down and allowing my hair to fall forward. I lick my lips and make a split second decision. On a downward stroke I lean down, placing a single kiss on the underside of his shaft. Embry's hips lurch and he groans a line of colorful curses. As I sit up I look at his face, worried that I went too far. I couldn't help myself though. I'm not ready to actually take him into my mouth, but I wanted to ease closer to that possibility.

Embry's erection twitches in my hand and I notice a bead of liquid on his head. I move my thumb to gently sweep it away, rubbing my now damp thumb across the tip. I can feel myself getting aroused quickly, the moisture between my thighs increases when I see his reaction. Embry moans my name followed by a low growl that has my stomach tightening. I know, from the other times I've touched him, he's close. His face is flushed and there are beads of sweat on his forehead and neck; being able to see _him_ arouses me more.

I take a deep breath and realize now that he's ready to cum; I don't know what to do. The other times I've touched him he has been wearing boxers and when he came, I didn't have to wonder where his ejaculate would go. "Embry..."

"Shirt, use- ung fuck, my shirt," he grunts out as I sweep my hand back down his erection. I gasp a little at his words, surprised that he realized what I was unsure about. I lift the hem of his shirt, the one I'm wearing, and awkwardly place it so it's hovering over the head of his penis. I pump my hand up, then back down and Embry arches his back, pressing his shoulders into the pillow. Thumb up the bottom side of his shaft, once, twice; then he's making the most beautiful sounds in between saying my name over and over.

I feel streams of his cum hitting the shirt as I gently slow my rhythm. Seeing him orgasm, watching him from this position, his head thrown back, eyes clenched shut, is incredibly hot. _I never thought seeing someone get off could turn me on so much._ My thighs are soaked and I feel so close to that same edge that Embry just fell over. _I want him so bad_.

I inhale deeply and shudder a little when Embry's hand captures my wrist. He takes the shirt tail from me and I look up at him. Before I can ask what he's doing he grumbles "Take it off, it's dirty."

I roll my eyes at little when I look up at his face. He looks disgusted so I lean down, kissing his lips before sitting back up. He grins crookedly at me and I lift my arms, giving him permission to pull it off of me. His calloused roughened hands move up my torso as he lifts the shirt higher. Embry's hands reach my breasts and he uses one to pull the clothing over my head and toss it on the floor. The other hand glides over my breast and I arch my back, pressing my aching nipple into the palm of his hand.

He gently takes my nipple between his thumb and index finger and pulls lightly, sending shock waves down my belly, to the juncture of my thighs. I shift my hips, trying to remember that I'm close enough to his cock that he could very well put a stop to all of this if I'm not careful. I tear my eyes away from his, the heat scorching me and I look down. Embry's flaccid penis is resting against his abdomen, the head hiding beneath his foreskin. I can't fight the grin that spreads across my face. _I just saw him naked. For the first time. I successfully gave him a hand job, thank you very much. I made him cum._

Embry chuckles and I tear my eyes away and up to his face. "What?" I ask before shifting my hips a fraction of an inch. _Just need a little bit of friction, if you please. _I'm so focused on waiting to hear Embry's reply that I don't realize he's shifting around, pulling one of his thighs between mine until it's too late.

"Just the look on your face," he says while grinning. "You look mesmerized."

"I am mesmerized," I tell him honestly and glance back down.

"You're pussy is wet," Embry says without warning and I shiver and moan at the deep sound of his voice. My head jerks up and I stare at him, the words I would have spoken trapped in my tightened throat. "What? You don't think I know? I can feel it, Lillah, your wet, slick with arousal. I can smell it too; I can smell and hear your body's reactions to me. It drives me insane."

Without warning or preamble, Embry presses his thigh between my legs. As he lifts his leg to meet my flesh, he brings his other hand to my breast and cups it, pinching both nipples gently. I'm unable to hold back the groan that escapes my lips or the way my hips twitch against his leg. I sigh a shuddering breath when Embry urges me on, speaking softly, "You're so beautiful, Lillah. I want to watch you cum. It's so sexy, knowing I do that to you. That no one else has or ever will."

I move against his legs upon hearing his words. He releases one of my breasts, making me moan when the weight of it bounces free. His hand moves down to my hip, helping me to find a rhythm. In the back of my mind I tell myself I should feel awkward, humping his leg, trying to come on his skin, but he feels so good. _Nothing I ever do with Embry could feel or be wrong_.

Embry releases my hip and moves his hand down between my legs. My clit aches at his touch; his thumb rubbing against it lightly brings me a little bit closer. I bite down on my bottom lip, pulling it into my mouth and moaning. My eyes slide shut and goose bumps break out all over my body. His hands, oh God, his hands; they are like magic on my body. His hand on my breast mimics the movements of his fingers between my legs. Embry slides a finger into me, though I'm not sure how he manages it, with me pressing myself against his leg so tightly.

"Lillah, baby, you feel so good."

I gasp at his words, moving faster against his hand. "You drive- me crazy, Embry." I lift one of my hands up to brush the hair out of my face, whisking away a light sheen of sweat. Embry slips a second finger into me and my eyes pop open to look at him. He's watching me, his eyes heavy lidded and full of lust, driving me on. "I'm- so close," I tell him with a shaky voice.

"Just relax, let me give you this, baby. My beautiful, sweet Lillah." It's ridiculous to say that Embry's words are the reason I'm finally able to let go, but when I hear them, I seem to be able to allow myself to release the hold I have on my body.

Embry presses his thumb against my clit and it sends me over. Wave after wave crashing over me as Embry's name tumbles from my lips. He pulls me down to kiss my mouth as shivers of pleasure roll up my spine. I could never get tired of how this man makes me feel, not just sexually, but emotionally as well. My heart swells when Embry adjusts my body so it's resting against his, our legs still tangled, skin damp with sweat.

I can hear his heart pounding with my head resting against his chest the way it is. I smile softly against his skin and he begins running his hand up and down my back. When he reaches the spot just between my shoulder blades I wiggle a little against him. He laughs lightly then groans when I come in contact with his semi hard on. _How in the world can he be turned on again already?_

"Lillah," he begins when I start to move away, to give him space. I stop immediately and he continues, "You are so amazing, don't ever doubt how perfect you are."

The tone of his voice is serious, almost sad. I look up at his face and he has the most intense look in his eyes. I can't help the smile that lifts my lips and I bury my pink tinted face against his neck. Embry chuckles when he feels the heat against his already scorching skin. His hand strokes up and down my back and I kiss his smooth skin before cuddling closer. "Can we just lay here for a while?"

"Yeah," he answers with a smile in his voice, "we have a while until we need to get ready."

I snuggle into Embry's side and allow my eyes to slip closed. I hear Embry speak quietly but I can't make out his words as I doze off.

-0-

My doorbell rings just as I'm finishing getting dressed. Ness sent me a text a short time ago saying she was on her way. When I reach the front door, I swing it wide in my excitement, surprised when I see not only Ness but another woman standing in front of me, "Uh, hi."

"Lillah this is my," Ness pauses, turning to look at the other woman, "cousin, Bella."

The name sounds familiar and I realize why; Angela and Embry were just talking about a 'Bella' the other night, "Bella. You aren't the same Bella that went to high school with my cousin, Angela, are you?"

"One and the same. I'm just dropping Renesmee off," Bella's smile is soft, the porcelain of her skin in direct contrast with the rich amber color of her eyes. Angela never mentioned how beautiful Bella is. I'm suddenly nervous, remembering that Embry said he knew Bella but how anxious he got all of a sudden. _Oh no. Please no. _"My husband, Edward, and I are going for a motorcycle ride of our own this afternoon." I try to make sure my sigh of relief is only internal, but a small smile crosses Bella's face right after.

Ness quickly turns to Bella, frowning, "You are? Somewhere other than where we're going?"

"Don't worry, Edward knows where Jacob is planning to take you, we will stay far away from there." Bella hugs Ness quickly, her smile bright, "Have fun today!"

I start to give Bella a little wave but before I can she is hugging me, "Any friend of Angela's, or for that matter, Renesmee, Jacob, and Embry, is a friend of mine."

"Oh, ok. It was great meeting you, Bella," I hug her back, surprised that she is not as soft as she appears. _She must work out._ As she steps back I catch a whiff of her perfume, something sweet; like flowers and vanilla mixed together.

Bella backs out of the driveway as we hear a motorcycle approaching. Jacob waves at Bella as they pass each other then pulls into my driveway. Deciding to go ahead and lock up the house, I grab my house key and place it, my license, a credit card and some cash in the spare pocket of my camera bag after locking up. I shoulder my camera bag for now, turning around to find Embry has also pulled up in the driveway.

Ness and I step down off the porch, walking toward the guys. They are quite a pair. It almost hurts to look at them; they look stunning on their motorcycles. "Wow," I mutter and Ness giggles, "Uh huh."

I guess I'm taking too long getting to him, because Embry suddenly jumps off his bike. He runs up to meet me halfway down the sidewalk, his smile bright as he pulls me close to him. The grin on his face makes my heart flutter. When he pulls me against him my stomach clenches. I circle my arms around him, inhaling his spicy masculine scent. _How is it possible to miss him so much after only being separated an hour?_ I know this isn't good, but I can't help myself. As I'm about to sigh into his chest, I feel him tense up. Embry takes a step back, pulling my arms away from him in a rush. It's as if he doesn't want to touch me.

Embry's head leans back, tilted to the side and his eyes, they are full of fire. I don't understand why he's furious but I can see his body shaking as he turns to face Jacob.

Even in his anger, all I see is the man I'm falling for. The power he possesses is beautiful and it draws me to him; even when my brain tells me that I should be afraid, my heart knows he could never harm me.

Embry speaks to Jacob through clenched teeth, "What was she doing here? She could have hurt Lillah."

I stay back because it's not my business what Embry is confronting Jacob about. At least, until I hear my name, that is. I step a little closer, hoping to make sense of Embry's anger filled words.

"I swear to you Jake, if she did anything to her-" Jacob cuts off Embry's words with a lift of his hand.

"Do you honestly think that she would do that? We've known Bella for years, Embry. She has never harmed anyone."

"She's one of _them_. I know what they are capable of; Lillah isn't like us. She isn't like Ness," Embry growls out and throws a look Ness' way. "Lillah is fragile."

I really have no idea what he is talking about now.

Ness runs over in between Jacob and Embry, "Hold on, Embry. You know I would never risk her bringing me here if I thought it might cause a problem. She's my-," Ness' voice drops too low for me to hear but it's obvious that Embry and Jacob can.

I stand back while the three of them have a discussion I can't hear. It's obvious by the looks of intensity on their faces that it's something important. Embry looks pissed, and so does Jacob and Ness, but I can see that their anger and annoyance is directed at Embry. His hands are flying through the air, his body shaking in rage. Whatever he's saying to them, they are not in agreement with his opinions.

Seeing him so obviously upset my only thought is to go to him. Unable to stop myself I move to him, tucking myself against his side, wrapping my arms around his chest. I don't think he's been this upset since I found him thrashing on my sofa on Monday due to a nightmare. His heart is pounding and it feels like every muscle in his body is clenched tight, including his jaw when I glance up at him.

"Embry? What's wrong?" He doesn't make eye contact with me as he shakes his head slightly; indicating he doesn't wish to tell me what has made him angry. I don't want to push the issue, but I need to know what is going on.

I glance over at Jacob, who looks exasperated, and Ness, who has a look of apology on her face. Resolving myself, I speak low, hating that I'm circumventing Embry, "Will either of you two tell me?"

Embry growls, "If you say anything-."

"Embry, she can't protect herself if she doesn't know," Jacob is speaking in a calm voice, but I can feel Embry shaking.

"_I_ can protect her," Embry roars out, pulling me tighter to his side.

Jacob's voice is soft, reasonable, "You can't be with her all the time. You have responsibilities Embry, and so does Lillah. She needs to be told the truth."

"It's my secret to tell," Ness looks at Embry, then steps forward, placing her hand on Embry's cheek. It's not a romantic gesture, but I still want to push her hand away from him.

A few seconds later, Embry shakes his head, whispering, "I know what she is, Ness. She is a part of the family, part of the secret."

Embry exhales, his muscles still tense, but starting to relax, "I'm sorry if I scared you, Lillah. I didn't mean to, but when I smelled you, when I smelled _her_, it scared me."

"Smelled _who_? Embry, what are you talking about?" My head is starting to hurt trying to follow this conversation that I don't understand.

"Bella." Embry growls out her name gruffly, but I still don't get what he's talking about.

"Lillah," Ness speaks softly, looking between Jacob and Embry before continuing, "Bella isn't my cousin, she's my mom."

"You're mom? Ness, you're seventeen. Bella went to high school with Angela. There is no way she's your mom," this has to be some sort of practical joke, maybe an initiation of some sorts.

Ness smiles sadly, "I'm not exactly seventeen, Lillah. My mom nearly died giving birth to me six years ago. My father brought her back to life by injecting his venom into her. My mom was human when she had me, but now," Ness looks up at Embry, hesitating. I can't look at him, my mind trying to keep up with what Ness is saying, "Now my mom is a vampire."

I try to look up at Embry but I don't make it, my world going black just as I hear him scream my name in the distance.

-0-

**A/N:** I know, we are some cliffy bitches, but come on, that is a FANTASTIC place to end this chapter. Good news is that Lillah got a LITTLE pissed with us for ending her chapter there, so she is actually going to have the next chapter, then we have back-to-back Embry chapters. Don't forget to click that little review button and let us know what you thought! Are you on Twitter? Let us know and we'll follow you back! We are, of course, StupidLeeches. Individually we are niceKittyRAWR and wolfh00r.


	26. Chapter 26 Everything Is Opposite

**Chapter 26 "Everything Is Opposite"**

**Disclaimer:** Not SM. Just two hard working Southern girls trying to survive the crap that is life by escaping into this amazing fantasy world.

**A/N:** WH here. I'm on my own this week since NKR is off cruising with her family. Sadly, I think my work is more fun than her vacation! LOTS going on in this chapter, including a surprise at the end y'all have been waiting for! Enjoy!

_But according to him  
I'm beautiful,  
incredible,  
he can't get me out of his head.  
According to him  
I'm funny,  
irresistible,  
everything he ever wanted.  
Everything is opposite,  
I don't feel like stopping it,  
so baby tell me what I got to lose.  
He's into me for everything I'm not,  
according to you._  
"According To You" - Orianthi

**LPOV**

"Lillah! Lillah please wake up!"

Embry sounds frantic as he speaks my name but I can't force myself to wake up. His strong arms are holding me tight and I just want to stay here, peaceful, for just a bit longer. But the panic in his voice makes me want to wake up, to calm him down. _He shouldn't be worrying about me, I'm fine._

But I know I'm not fine. Something isn't right; there is a thought in the back of my mind that keeps trying to force its way forward.

"Ness, you shouldn't have just hit her with that. We've all had years to deal with this," Embry's voice is rough, angry. He shouldn't talk to Ness like that. _Ness._ The thought wiggles a little closer to the front. _It has to do with Ness._

Ness sounds upset, "I'm sorry, Embry. Jake told me you had given Lillah a basic description of the vampires. I thought she would recognize Mom right away."

_Ness. Mom. Vampires._ The thought is nearly there, screaming for me to catch up and deal with it.

"This isn't Ness' fault, Embry, and you know it. You can't protect Lillah by keeping her in the dark about the world she is now very much a part of," Jacob is calm, reasonable. No wonder he's the Alpha. _Mmm, calm and reasonable is nice, but I like when Embry loses his cool, like this morning._

Embry's lips brush across my forehead, down my nose and touch lightly against my lips. He speaks so softly I barely hear him, "Please Lillah, wake up baby, I need you."

My brain is telling my hand to move but it won't. I want to feel his cheeks, look into those beautiful brown eyes and tell him I need him too. But I still can't move, I can't wake up.

"Ness, which cover did you use to explain Bella to Lillah?" Embry's voice is soft, no longer accusatory, simply curious.

"Cousin."

That word breaks the thought free. _Ness. Mom. Vampires. Cousin. _And then I hear Ness' words to me right before I fainted clearly in my mind, "Bella isn't my cousin. She's my mom."

Everything comes rushing back to me like a river overtaking a dam. My heart starts pounding as I'm reminded of what just happened. _A vampire touched me. Embry smelled a vampire on me. Ness' mom is a vampire._

Hearing my own heart pounding in my chest makes me realize there is another heart beating just as rapidly against my ear. _Embry._ My eyelids finally break apart to reveal Embry looking down at me. His deep brown eyes, so wide with worry, are locked on mine. As I take stock of my body and where we are, I can now feel Embry rocking us back and forth. Now that I'm finally have control over my hand again, I move it to his cheek, speaking softly, unsure of my own voice, "I'm ok. I promise."

Embry's breath rushes out of his body as he simultaneously pulls me tight to him and completely surrounds me. My arms are crushed against his chest while his hands explore my upper body.

"Are you sure? I've never- Lillah you just started falling. I barely scooped you up in time," Embry is whispering against my neck as he pushes my hair over my shoulder to inspect my skin.

Leaning back slightly I free my hands, maneuvering them back to grab his hair, tugging his head from my neck. I look into his eyes, speaking low, "I definitely was not expecting that bomb shell, but I promise you, my body is fine."

Embry doesn't say anything, just continues his exploration. I want to throw a hissy fit, tell him to stop. At the same time, I know he needs to do this, to prove to himself I really am ok.

Hearing a throat clearing behind me, I glance over my shoulder. Jacob and Ness are standing on my back porch, rather awkwardly, like they don't want to be here.

Ness speaks softly when my eyes land on hers, "I'm sorry, Lillah."

"It's ok Ness, honestly. I just- wasn't expecting- I mean- your mom- vampire," I'm unable to say anything else, my brain still working through what I've learned so far.

Ness smiles, appearing to relax a little more, "Don't try to figure it out right now. I'll explain everything later. She's good though, she's never had human blood. She would never hurt you. I tried to remind that stubborn wolf of yours, but he's being irrational."

"It isn't irrational for me to be concerned about Lillah, Ness," Embry speaks evenly, but I can tell he's getting agitated again.

Jacob speaks up for the first time since I came to, "He's right, Ness. It isn't irrational for him to be concerned about Lillah's safety. The other girls are safe in La Push. You have the Cullen's to help protect you, plus your own strength and speed. Lillah is a human here in Forks by herself. We probably should have been more understanding of Embry's concerns. We could have made him aware that Bella was going to drop you off here today."

"I guess. I'm sorry, Embry. I really didn't know Mom was going to come to the door with me. I think she just wanted to meet Lillah," Ness looks at Embry like she's trying to tell him more without saying everything. _Must be about her mom being a vampire. Ok, that is just weird._ _Hello, you're currently sitting in the lap of a werewolf._ _Yes, but its Embry. I've come to terms with him being a wolf._ _A vampire is just a whole different brand of crazy that I'm not ready to deal with yet._

Instead, I deal with my irritation that is starting to develop. Pushing against Embry's chest I lean back until our eyes meet. Doing my best teacher glare I give him a piece of my mind, "I'm awake now, no need to continue talking about me like I'm not here." Speaking a little more gently, I run my fingers slowly over his tense jaw, "I appreciate your concern, but you need to ease up on Ness. She didn't do anything wrong. Her mom was very nice to me."

"Lillah, you don't understand-," Embry looks so worried, but his worry seems unfounded to me.

Needing to hear a calm, rational voice, I speak, but keep my eyes locked with Embry's, "Jacob. Be honest. Am I in any more danger now than I was before I met Bella?"

Jacob scoffs, quickly answering, "No."

I raise my eyebrows at Embry in question. He shakes his head softly, "Lillah, you might not be now-."

Cutting him off, I speak to Jacob again, but continue to look at Embry, "Jake, would Bella hurt me?"

"No!" This time it's Ness that answers my question. "Embry, you know my mom. You know my whole family. None of them would harm Lillah. They know-," Ness stops suddenly. Since I can't see her, I don't know why, but she starts up again quickly, "My family agreed to the new treaty. Embry, please, trust them."

I can feel Embry's growl against my stomach. Leaning back into him, I wrap my arms around his neck and whisper against his ear, "Trust _me_, Embry. I'm ok."

"I do trust you, Lillah. It's the vampires I don't trust. One move by them and you wouldn't be my Lillah anymore. Smelling her on you- Lillah it scared the hell out of me. If I lost you-," Embry sighs against my cheek. "Just please, understand. I can't lose you."

I nod my head, my cheek rubbing against the stubble on his face. Tears are threatening at his admission. It may not be what I really want to hear, but I know exactly how he feels. I mumble my words out against his skin, my lips pressed just below his ear, "I know, Em. I feel the same way."

The room is silent as Embry rocks me back and forth a few times. Finally Jacob clears his throat then speaks a little louder than needed, "So, are we still on for that motorcycle ride?"

Before Embry can say anything, I lean back, grinning wide at Jacob, "I'm in."

Embry sighs, "Fine."

Ness whispers something to Jacob then presses her hand against his cheek. Jacob's eyes close and he nods, "Yeah, Edward heard my thoughts about that the other day. He promised they'd stay away."

"What's going on?" Embry demands, sitting up straighter, again tugging me to him.

"Nothing, Embry. Just Bella and Edward are going out for a motorcycle ride this afternoon," Jacob explains then clarifies before Embry can say anything, "nowhere near us. I told Edward our path the other day. He's going to stay clear."

Embry frowns then mumbles, "I don't like it."

"Embry," I gently push against his cheek, turning his head until we are eye-to-eye, "are you going to pout all day or are we going to ride this motorcycle of yours?" Tilting my head down to his ear I whisper softly, "Personally, I can't wait to have my arms wrapped around you all afternoon."

"You don't play fair," Embry growls.

Jacob laughs, "I like your style, Lillah."

Embry sighs, his arms finally loosening their grip on me as he helps me to stand. When he lifts up out of the swing I glance up at the hooks in the ceiling then back to him. He tilts his head, grinning as he looks up at the ceiling before whispering against my ear, "I had the same thought the other night. We might have to try the swing out later."

My cheeks turn bright red when I hear Jacob's laughter. But instead of giving me time to hide, Embry takes my hand, leading us back around to the front. He helps me to secure my camera bag then places a helmet on my head. He leans forward, brushing his lips against mine, "You look adorable in a helmet."

"Aren't you going to wear one?"

Embry shakes his head and I frown, "Practically indestructible, remember?"

He helps me onto the bike, making sure I'm comfortable before he joins. Once he's settled I lean forward, locking my fingers together over his stomach. Embry turns his head to look at me, his smile bright, "No funny business, Lillah, hands above the waist at all times. If you go any lower, I'll probably crash the bike."

"Fine," I sigh, rolling my eyes, "I'll try to behave."

Embry shakes his head, laughing, and then turns to Jacob. He nods once and then starts the bike up. It's louder than I expected and when Embry revs the engine, I can hear it and feel it, right in between my legs. _Oh boy, this is going to be a long day._

-0-

We ride for what feels like hours. Embry stops periodically for me to take pictures, then we speed off to catch up with Jacob and Ness. I never expected to enjoy riding a motorcycle so much. Obviously, sharing it with Embry makes it even more special, but the feeling of freedom is amazing. I only wish that I could remove the helmet so I could rest my head against Embry's back. Even so, holding on tight to Embry is such a rush. My entire chest is flat against his back, my thighs open wide around his, and my arms grip him like he is my lifeline. I find myself syncing my breathing with his as my hands find their way under his t-shirt to his warm skin. Embry growls and I know I'm pushing my luck but I need to feel him.

As much as I like Jacob and Ness, I suddenly wish they weren't along for this ride. I'd love nothing more than for Embry to stop the bike and let me move forward. I want to wrap my legs around his waist and feel him in my hands again. I want him to lean me back over the handlebars and have his way with me. I want him to rev the engine as he-

The engine beneath me slows down as my imagination speeds up. I look up to find Jacob and Ness have stopped just ahead of us. Embry stops the motorcycle next to Jacob's, quickly sliding off the bike. I wait as long as I can to remove the helmet, hoping the flush on my cheeks will recede quickly.

Embry winks at me when I remove the helmet, then lifts me off the bike, pulling me against him. I can easily feel that he is just as turned on as I am, which makes me want to attack him. My arms encircle his neck, tugging his mouth down to mine. His lips are just as eager as mine are, our kiss more raw than normal. Embry pulls back, panting.

"I don't know what you were thinking about, but based on your crazy heartbeat, erratic breathing and the intoxicating scent coming from you, I'm guessing it's similar to what I was thinking about."

I lift up on my toes, whispering against his ear, "I was thinking about all the naughty things we could do on that motorcycle if we were alone."

"Another time." Embry kisses me softly then whispers, "Next time, we'll be alone. I want you in my lap, your hips grinding against-."

"Enough!" Jacob bellows, cutting Embry off mid-sentence.

I can hear Ness snickering behind us, "Yeah, Jacob's virgin ears can't stand all your dirty talk."

"I do not have virgin ears, Ness. You don't need to be hearing this," Jacob's voice is low, but I can still hear him.

I slowly turn around to find Ness placing her hand against Jacob's face again. I feel a little awkward watching this moment between the two of them. Neither of their lips are moving and Jacob's eyes are closed. I lean into Embry, "Should we go?"

Embry shakes his head just as Jacob's eyes pop open and he growls out, "Do Edward and Bella know that you hear that?"

Embry chuckles and I look back at him, "What? What just happened?"

"Ness will explain it all to you. Come on, I'm starving," he grabs my hand and leads me a short distance until we reach a beach.

I look around, not recognizing the area, "Where are we?"

"This is Neah Bay. Jake thought it might be nice to eat out here, stretch our legs before heading back," Embry looks around the empty beach, smiling. "We have the place to ourselves."

Jacob walks up behind us, "Don't worry, the girls will still see when I kick your ass at football."

Ness catches my eye and winks, shaking her head, "Come on guys, food first."

We set up a make-shift picnic with blankets and even a small fire since it is much chillier here on the beach with the breeze off the ocean. I sit down on the blanket, careful to leave a little distance between myself and Embry, trying not to make Jacob or Ness feel uncomfortable. But as Jacob unpacks the food, Embry reaches over and pulls me to him. I should protest, but I can't; not when being so close to him feels so right.

Trying to be as casual as possible while sitting in Embry's lap, I try to focus on what Jacob and Ness are up to. I'm surprised at all the food Jacob brought, "Did you make all this?"

"Hell no! Dad cooked it all up for us. I was going to bring sandwiches but he said between Embry and I we'd eat them all," Jacob shrugs, "He's probably right, I'm starving."

"I'm actually pretty hungry myself," with Embry and me staying in bed so late this morning, I didn't have time to eat before Ness came over. My stomach grumbles in agreement.

We each grab some food and start eating. I can feel Embry's eyes on me as I work on a second helping of a delicious chicken salad, "What?"

"Nothing." Embry rests his chin against my shoulder, whispering, "I like watching you eat."

I don't say anything, but I smile back at him, enjoying this moment. Being here with Ness and Jacob, I'm reminded of Rachel's comment the other night; how it's not in the rule book about the guys having to tell their imprintees what happened. I try to put myself in Ness' shoes. _How would I react if I found out Embry had imprinted on me and kept it a secret?_ I feel like if I were Ness, I would want to be angry with him. My heart pounding in my chest tells me the honest answer to the question. _I would want to be angry, but I wouldn't care._ I would be excited, happy, overwhelmed, but not angry. How could I be angry when my every hope, wish, and dream would be coming true? _If only._

"Lills? You ok?" Embry whispers softly in my ear.

I nod, too choked up to say anything. Embry frowns, "Jacob wants to play football, but if you'd rather I didn't-."

"No, I'm fine. Go play. I'd like to talk to Ness anyway," I'm impressed with my ability to speak evenly as I fight back the emotions.

"Ok, if you're sure, but we can go home any time," Embry gently moves me off his lap and stands, leaning forward to kiss the top of my head. I feel empty already without him near me. _I'm in so much trouble._

Ness and I don't say anything as we watch the guys walk down closer to the ocean. As soon as they stop they both remove their shirts and shoes. I can tell Jacob is just a ripped as Embry, but I only have eyes for Embry, "Oh. Wow. That never gets old."

"I know." Ness sighs next to me, "I swear, he just gets more beautiful."

I lean back, smiling at Ness, "I don't know, you are a pretty stunning yourself."

Ness blushes slightly, "Oh, thanks, Lillah. It's hard sometimes, the women in my family- well, you met my mom. They are all like that. Perfect and beautiful."

"You just described everyone I've met so far; the guys, the imprintees, you, your mom. I seriously don't know what Embry sees in me, I feel like the ugly duckling next to everyone. Short, round, pale- different," I shake my head, laughing at my absurdity but knowing that is how I feel.

"Trust me, Lillah, Embry thinks you're beautiful. Besides, you think _you're_ different? Try being half human and half _vampire_."

My mouth falls open and I look at her. I'm not sure how to respond so I just look at her closer. Noticing not for the first time how beautiful her skin, facial features and eyes are; she looks like a perfect porcelain doll. She's stunning but I assumed it was just family genes. But for her to tell me something like this completely blows my mind. Granted, it probably shouldn't, not after what happened earlier, but still.

"You're..." I can't finish my sentence

Ness' face is blank of expression as she speaks, "Yep."

"Half." I can't say the second word but my mind is screaming. _Vampire._

"Uh huh."

"The more I learn, the weirder things become," I muse.

Ness sits their quietly, letting me process the information. Finally I give Ness a soft smile; I hope I come off as inviting and not terrified looking, "Would you tell me about your family? I promise, I'll try not to pass out this time."

Ness grins, "Sure. You ready? This gets a little weird, and complicated."

I resolve myself to listen with an open mind. I nod, "Yes, I'm ready."

-0-

_I wasn't ready_. I managed not to pass out as Ness explained everything, but just barely. My "relationship" with Embry suddenly seems almost normal compared to her mom and dad. Ness lives with two vampires in a cottage, one of whom can read minds. _Reminder to myself, never get near Edward, he could tell Embry everything._ Her "grandparents" are vampires, one of which is the head doctor at the Forks Hospital. _I think I'll be switching to the clinic on the Reservation going forward._ She has two aunts and two uncles, all four of whom are also vampires. Among her aunts and uncles one can see the future and another can manipulate emotions. _Oh God, definitely need to avoid them._ These vampires are "vegetarians", meaning they don't drink human blood. _Uh yeah, because that makes it better._

I remember Embry saying something at the bonfire about the "Cold Ones" and how the group in Forks were "vegetarians". It's weird to find out that he was describing Ness' family, "So, the guys, they are all cool with you living with the vampires?"

Ness gives a delicate shrug. It seems like she doesn't care but there is more she isn't saying, "Some more than others. Embry has only gotten freaked out about my family since you came around."

"He's being ridiculous," I frown, wishing I could knock a little sense into Embry.

"Actually, he probably isn't being ridiculous, you are unprotected in Forks. But he should know my family wouldn't hurt you."

I still can't figure out why they are all so worried about me. I understand that the scent of Embry on me could put me in danger, but somehow it still doesn't make complete sense to me. I sigh, refocusing on Ness, "So who else isn't so cool?"

Ness nibbles on her bottom lip before speaking softly, "I don't know if Sam will ever completely be ok with me. I'm glad the guys have worked things out now, and Sam agreed to the treaty, but I still feel like he's not completely comfortable with me."

"Worked things out? Are you talking about the guys splitting up their pack? Embry told me that Sam used to be his Alpha but he wouldn't tell me why they split." My interest is suddenly peaked, knowing I'm about to get an answer.

"Embry has been very good to me, protecting my secrets. The pack split in two because of me. When Sam found out Mom was a human pregnant with a vampire's baby-," Ness smiles sadly, "Mom says Sam didn't understand. Emily says he's just stubborn." Ness looks down at her hands and whispers, "Sam didn't want me to be born and was willing to sacrifice Mom to make sure I wasn't born. Jacob disagreed. He split off, then Seth and Leah joined Jacob. Soon after, Quil and Embry also joined Jacob's pack."

"Oh. Wow." I don't know what to say. I'm kind of glad Embry didn't explain all of this to me earlier, I definitely was not ready then; I'm not totally sure I'm ready now. I glance up at Ness, unsure of what to say, "Ness-."

Ness smiles softly, "It's ok, it was a long time ago." Ness looks worried, "I'm sorry, was that too much? Embry was right before, I shouldn't have just hit you with everything."

"It's ok. I'm not upset. It is a lot, but I appreciate you sharing. Embry is just very-," I search for the right word. He is protective, but that doesn't seem like enough of an explanation for this morning.

"Irrational? Absurd? Distraught? Insane? Invalid? Ridiculous? Unreasonable?"

I can't help giggling, "Yes, a little of all of those. Did you memorize the dictionary?"

"My dad is all of those and more, especially about my school work." Ness smiles, "He means well."

"Who? Your dad?"

Ness shrugs, "Him too, but I actually meant Embry." Ness pauses then looks at me hesitantly, "May I show you something, Lillah?"

"Sure."

Ness scoots a little closer to me on the blanket and lifts her hand like she's going to touch my cheek, "You might want to close your eyes for this, it's a little easier that way."

I'm perplexed, but I do as she says. A few seconds later I feel her warm palm against my cheek and then I see _something_ behind my closed eyelids.

_Embry and I are walking out of the kitchen at Emily's place. _Oh, wow. This is like a movie replaying last night. _Embry sits down on the love seat but I see myself look around the room for a second before Embry's arms reach out and pull me into his lap. _He does that a lot._ I look tense but then I see Embry kiss the side of my neck and I seem to sink into him. _Oh God, is that really how I act with him?

_Focusing on the scene before me, I'm shocked at the look on Embry's face as he watches me take a bite of the cheesecake. His eyes are glued to my lips, almost like he's jealous of the fork. Then he shakes his head, frowning, seeming to be upset with himself for something. I want to ask what is going on but then I see myself again fill the fork with the cheesecake, this time offering Embry a bite._

This I remember._ Embry's reaction set my pulse to pounding and seeing this replay turns me on all over again. His eyes close and the most beautiful sounds come from him as I watch myself pull the fork from his mouth. I can hear me ask him if it's good as my cheeks turn bright pink. _Good Lord I'm so obvious. _Of course, I was feeling good last night with all the wine, but still, I can't believe how I was acting._ Like a love sick puppy.

_As embarrassed as I am over watching me make a fool of myself with Embry I can't help but want to see more of our time together, "That was- mmm sinful. It's a shame it'll be completely devoured and you won't have any left overs for us later."_

_I watch myself kiss Embry then tell him, "I made two. There's another whole cheesecake at home."_

Home? Oh God. Is that what I really said? Like Embry lives with me? Seriously, could I be any more obvious with how I feel about him? Sure, I feel like it's his home too; honestly it doesn't feel like home unless he's there, but still. I'm pathetic.

_The Embry in my mind is again kissing me, "You are a mind reader, woman."_

_I see me laugh as I speak, "Nope, just selfish. I knew I'd want to eat half of it myself."_

_"Those two are so obvious! They are almost as bad as Paul and Rachel," I turn my head to see Jacob sitting next to me. I suddenly realize I've been watching this scene unfold from someone else's eyes. _Ness.

_I can hear her whisper, "Yeah, but it's cute to see. I didn't think I'd ever see Embry with someone."_

_"True," Jacob smiles then Ness looks around the rest of the room. I can see all the rest of the couples with their eyes pointed toward the love seat; Embry and I. The guys are all smiling like crazy but I see Emily, Rachel and Kim trying to get the guys to stop watching. My, Ness', eyes fall on Seth and he grins wide at her, rolling his eyes._

_Finally, Ness turns back to Embry and I as I hear him tell me, "You be selfish all you want. I like this side of you, personally. I hope you'll share at least a little bit with me though."_

_I watch, stunned as Embry's fingers move to my chest, outlining my breasts. _He is _so_ a boob man._ I notice I don't say anything, but I hear myself hum softly. Then I watch my eyes pop open and I see a grin bloom across my face as I speak, "Of course."_

_"They are obvious," I hear Ness' voice speak, "but they are also adorable. Lillah is very lucky, Embry is a good man."_

I try to calm myself down as I feel Ness' hand pull back from my cheek. A replay of last night was not what I was expecting her to "show" me.

When I open my eyes again, they naturally fall on Embry playing football with Jacob. Embry suddenly stops, looking up at me with a wicked grin on his face. It's like he knows I'm turned on again. I can just barely see his mouth move and it looks like he mouths, "Later." My heart pounds but I nod in agreement. Embry winks at me before turning back to Jacob.

I turn my back to the boys, wanting to talk to Ness about what she just showed me. I try to clear my thoughts, needing to understand what I just saw, "That was a memory, right? How did you-? I mean- what are-?" I stop myself from continuing, hoping I'm not embarrassing Ness.

"Both of my parents have special gifts, and so do I. I can show people memories or thoughts by touching them. Sometimes it's just an easier way to explain things; seeing it with your own eyes," Ness looks at me cautiously. She smiles softly before continuing, "Lillah, don't be embarrassed, trust me, I see a lot of couples that are way more obvious than you and Embry were last night. My Aunt Rose and Uncle Emmett, for example. You two were tame compared to them."

"Still. I can't believe we were acting like that in front of everyone. How embarrassing," I drop my head into my hands, trying to hide how bright my cheeks are.

I can hear Ness laughing, "Lillah, it's fine, no one cares. Besides, it's nice to see Embry with you. I wasn't lying last night, I didn't think I'd ever see Embry with someone. It's like he's a completely different person around you."

"Completely different? Better or worse?" I peek up over my hands, nervous to hear what Ness has to say.

Ness' laugh is musical, "Better, definitely! I've known Embry my whole life. He's always been a sweet guy, but he's never really been a part of things. Even riding motorcycles, I know he and Jake would go out sometimes, but he'd never join Jake and I out like this. Not until you. He would make appearances at parties like last night, but he would never joke around, be like one of the guys. Trust me, you've made Embry a much better person."

"Thanks for that, but I doubt it's really all me. I mean, I'm sure he'd want to bring any other woman he might date around," I shrug, trying not to think about how much Ness' words excite me.

"Lillah, if he were to date 'any other woman', he couldn't risk bringing her around the other guys. That's why he never dated anyone before you. Jacob doesn't like that I know Embry used to sleep around, but that's why. You knowing about all of this means not only can Embry have you around all of us, but he can be himself with you."

Finally dropping my hands back into my lap I look up at Ness, "I guess. Do you think that's the only reason he's with me? Because he can have me around, since I know what's going on?"

"I think it's a bonus that he can have you around because you know what's going on, but I have a feeling Embry would want to be with you even if you didn't know all our secrets. You _are_ different from all of us, Lillah, but I think that is one of the many things Embry likes about you. He's different from all of us too, so you two slip into your own world, even when you are around everyone else. Last night, when you two were sharing the cheesecake, it was like you didn't even know we were all there," Ness grins at me.

"Yeah. My mom said the same thing the other night; we seem to get lost in each other. I don't mean too. I honestly can't believe I was kissing him and acting like that last night," I can feel my cheeks again darkening.

Ness' smile softens and when she speaks it's barely above a whisper, "Lillah, it's ok to act like you feel. You two just looked like a couple in love, no different from how Sam, Jared, and Paul look with Emily, Kim, and Rachel."

"But we aren't in love and Embry didn't imprint on me," I whisper.

"Lillah," Ness is speaking but she isn't quite meeting my eyes, "Embry doesn't have to imprint to fall in love with you. You two could be together and live a long happy life." Ness hesitates then whispers, "Jacob was in love with my mom; probably still is."

"What?" I know Jacob imprinted on Ness, but I also know I have to keep his secret for him.

"Don't worry, my mom loves my dad. The way you look at Embry reminds me of my mom sometimes, like you're shocked he could even be interested. If you could just see how my dad watches my mom, and how Embry watches you, you'd understand. But Jake was in love with my mom. If Mom had picked him, I wouldn't exist," Ness looks further down the beach but I can see tears in her eyes.

_I want to comfort Ness but I'm trying to figure all this out. If Ness was never born then Jacob's perfect woman would have never existed. Jacob could have been with Bella and never imprinted. Which means, imprint or not, I really could be with Embry, because he may never find his imprintee. Then again, she could walk into his life tomorrow and I'd be out the door in an instant._

"Ness, you don't really think Jacob is still in love with your mom, do you?"

Ness whips her head back around to me. There is a frown on her face, "I want to think he's moved on, but I don't know. Jacob doesn't even sleep around like Embry use to." Ness blushes then admits, "I've asked my dad to scan his mind, find out if he's been with anyone. Dad usually just laughs and tells me I have nothing to worry about in that department. But if that's so, then what's going on? I mean, we are best friends, but I sometimes wonder if he's just friends with me so he can see Mom still."

"I don't think that's it, Ness." Knowing I can't tell her what I've been told I try to give her a little hope, "Jacob seems to only have eyes for you. Every time I would look at you two last night his eyes were locked on you."

"Really?" Ness' face lights up with a bright smile.

I grin, nodding my head, but another memory hits me, "Yeah, but I noticed you weren't always looking at Jacob. What's going on with you and Seth?"

Ness turns to look at the boys. I follow her, my eyes landing on Embry again. I forget I even asked Ness a question until she starts talking, "Nothing is going on with Seth. He's a friend."

"Like Embry and I are friends?" I know it's not true, but I have to ask.

"Oh God! No!" Ness' eyes return to me, "Honestly, we are just friends. He, uh- my dad is teaching him. Seth wants to go to college, so my dad is trying to help him out."

"Seth doesn't mind being around him?" Given Embry's reaction earlier, I'm surprised Seth can tolerate them.

Ness shrugs her shoulders, seeming to know what I'm thinking, "Embry is in a different situation, Seth can protect himself, Embry is worried about you. Seth and Jacob both come to the house a lot."

"So you have two extremely hot men come visit you, huh? So which one do you like most?"

Ness turns to Jacob again, "No questions asked. Jacob."

"But?"

"But Seth treats me differently. We are friends, but he treats me like-," Ness shakes her head, "Jake is my best friend, but sometimes, he treats me like a baby. It feels like he's keeping me at a distance."

"Maybe he's trying to protect you?" I want to scream at Ness, tell her Jacob imprinted, but I can't. I know that isn't for me to do.

Ness smiles softly, "You mean like Embry is trying to protect you?"

Glancing over at the guys I see they are walking back to us. Embry is again grinning wide, elbowing Jacob. I look back at Ness, "I guess. Sometimes it feels like it's more than just protecting with Embry, but I just don't know. Do you ever feel that way with Jacob?"

Ness smiles at me, nodding as the guys approach, "Every day."

-0-

Embry stops the motorcycle in my driveway. I want to climb forward on the bike, but I'm also a little nervous about my neighbors seeing us. Embry helps me off, removing the helmet then pulling me against his chest, kissing the top of my head, "I'm going to go drop the bike off at home, then I'll be back, ok?"

All I can manage is to nod in agreement. As much as I don't want him to leave, even for a short time, I'd like to start cooking dinner and get ready for the day tomorrow before he comes back.

Slowly releasing my grip on his waist, I step back, smiling, "What do you want for dinner?"

Embry revs the engine then grins, "You naked on the back porch swing?"

"Embry!" My blush is quick. I'm surprised by his comment but also a little intrigued by the idea.

He winks at me then pulls out of the driveway. Forcing myself to move, I rush inside, knowing I don't have much time before he comes back. Dropping my bag off in the bedroom, I run to the kitchen. I quickly pull together the ingredients for chicken pot pie. Once the filling is complete, I cover it with the pie crust and set it to bake in the oven. Rushing back to the bedroom I strip down, deciding I need a quick shower after being on the motorcycle all day and the sand at the beach. I pull my hair back and make quick work of the shower.

When I walk out in the bedroom wrapped in my towel I seriously consider Embry's words, but I just can't. Instead, I decide to skip panties again, since he seemed to enjoy that the other night. I pull on my yoga pants but stop when I reach for a bra. It's probably asking for trouble but I can't wait to see Embry's reaction when he realizes I also don't have on a bra. Knowing that Embry will probably keep me distracted all night long, I go ahead and set my alarm for the morning as well as pick out my clothes for tomorrow. Thank goodness I finished my lesson plans yesterday while Embry was working.

Grabbing a book, I check on the pot pie then pad out to the back porch. I've just managed to slow my heart down by focusing on the details of "The Da Vinci Code" when I hear trees rustling behind me. I turn to look out into the now dark yard, but I can't see anything. I force myself to return to the book. A few moments later I hear the door to the screened in porch open up.

When I look up, I'm surprised to see Embry standing next to me. I'm stunned when I realize he's naked, and very turned on. My breath comes out in shallow pants as I look up to his face. He's grinning, "You're clothed."

"You aren't." I do my best not to look at his extremely obvious erection but I can't help the smile that crosses my face, "I guess you missed me?"

"I always miss you. Should I get dressed?"

His simple admission goes straight to my heart. I know I should tell him to get dressed, but I want him just as much as he obviously wants me. I shake my head, scooting my legs over to make room for him.

Embry sits, taking the book from my hands and placing it on the floor. He then picks me up and sits me down in his lap, my knees on either side of his thighs, and his cock within easy reach for my hands.

Needing to occupy my hands, I wrap my arms around his neck, pulling his lips to mine. Embry's lips move easily against mine. Our kiss isn't hurried, it's slow, enjoyable.

Embry pulls back from my lips, whispering, "Lillah, you were driving me crazy today. Between remembering what happened this morning, riding around with you on a motorcycle and sensing your body's reaction to that motorcycle ride, all I could think about today was all the ways I wanted to please you tonight."

"No, Embry." Shaking my head, "I don't want you to please me."

Embry looks shell shocked, his face going pale quickly, "What?"

"No, Embry, that's not what I meant. I mean I don't want you to _just _please me. I want us to please each other. I want to touch you while you please me. I want to feel you again."

Embry exhales loudly, "Don't scare me like that, Lillah." Sniffing the air, Embry tilts his head, "How are we on time for dinner to cook."

"We've got about half an hour," I mumble, leaning forward to kiss his lips again.

"Not a lot of time, but it's a good start for what I want to do to you," Embry growls out before crushing his lips against mine.

His words and the intensity of his kiss have my mind swirling immediately. Our tongues meet, his dipping into my mouth just as his hands grip my hips and tug my forward. My reaction to him is immediate; I moan into his mouth, shudder against him and shift my hips, pressing against his hardness. I don't think I'll ever get use to feeling his body's reaction to mine, not even if this lasts a million years. Every time we are this close I can't help but feel in awe of him.

Embry's hands travel up my back, beneath my tank top until he reaches the spot where my bra should be. He pulls his head back to look at me, a sly grin on his face. I feel the flush rise up my neck and my face but I don't look away from him. I want to allow myself to drown in the look I see in his eyes. His face holds a look of intensity, his dark eyes full of so many emotions I can't read. He is so beautiful; I hope he never loses his need and desire for me.

When Embry nudges my arms I move them from around his neck and lift them in the air, allowing him to pull my tank top up and over my head. His face dips down before I can even react then his mouth is kissing the swell of my breasts, moving back and forth between both of them. Embry's mouth moves further down with each kiss until he's just above my aching nipples. He nips gently at my tender flesh before placing his mouth over one of my nipples, sending electric shocks of desire through my body. His mouth tugs gently and he swirls his tongue around it before moving over to give the other nipple the same attention. _He's nothing if not thorough._

I run my hands over his chest, delighting in the dips and curves of his smooth, muscular skin. Every place my hands move on his torso, I can feel his muscles ripple beneath my finger tips. I allow my eyes to drop and roam all over his body, taking all of him in. Oh the things I would love to do to this man. _The things I would love for him to do to _me. The thought is barely finished before Embry pulls harder on my nipple and brings me so I'm completely straddling his straining erection. I press myself down on him, grinding into him and loving the sounds that are escaping his throat.

Each time I'm with him in this way it's hard for me to imagine being more turned on than I am at that moment. Then Embry proves me wrong every single time. I'm so wet for him; I'm sure he can feel it through the thin layer of cotton that separates us. With every pull of his mouth on my breasts I match his action by moving my hips, pressing myself against him; clenching my muscles as if I'm taking him into my body over and over. I want him so badly that I nearly blurt out a plea for him to please take me but he lifts his face and covers my mouth with his, stopping any words I might have uttered.

I'm gasping for air and I can't do anything but sigh and whimper because of what he's doing to my body. I drop my head against Embry's shoulder, still rocking my hips with his guiding hands. I open my eyes and look down, watching our bodies meet thrust for thrust. I indulge in a little fantasy that Embry can't control himself any longer and rips my pants, burying himself in me. Just then, I hear his deep voice growl my name, "Lillah, you're driving me insane. I need to cum, baby. You're going to have to use your shirt or something."

I shake my head at his words. Not that I mind using my shirt but in some sick way, I want to see his release this time. I don't know why I feel the urge, maybe just as a confirmation of what I can do to him. Maybe because I've never seen a man cum like this. Either way, I take a breath and lift my head to look into Embry's face when I tell him what I want to do. His eyes bug out as I speak quickly, "Can we do it without covering you? I want to see-" I pause and swallow thickly, my mouth feels like it's full of cotton and I have to work to form my words.

"Lillah, that would be kind of messy," Embry explains, his gruff voice trailing off. He looks a little unsure but a whole lot turned on. While he stares at me, trying to decide whether this is a good idea or not, I take the opportunity to buck my hips against him again. Embry groans and drops his head back, exposing his neck. I grin, quickly dropping my lips to his skin as he jumps beneath me. I don't waste any time and start to suck on his flesh, causing Embry to move his hips up to meet mine with force. Just as I bite down gently with my front teeth Embry lifts his head. I don't feel his hands shift position, moving from my hips until he's sliding his long fingers into the front of my pants.

The slow burn in the pit of my stomach reaches new heights as Embry's hand begins to press against my swollen, wet flesh. I feel like I may cum, then and there, when his long fingers slip into me. If possible, I feel like I've grown wetter, just by having his hand on me. I moan Embry's name and shiver against his body as I lift my head to look at him. I allow my hands to run up his chest, over his shoulders and back down, grazing his nipples. I grin at him when he hisses at the sensation. "What's wrong Embry?" I ask in a teasing tone. "You can't handle a little fair play?"

Embry's eyes narrow at my words. He brings his free hand up to my breast and before I realize his intentions, he takes my nipple between two fingers and tugs. My entire body tingles, the pleasure-pain shooting straight to the apex of my legs. My eyes roll back and I shift so that Embry's erection is in the center of my wet heat. I can't take it anymore, I need him to make me cum before I lose my mind. Embry pulls his hand from my pants and I growl at him, making him laugh before he leans forward to nip at my bottom lip. His hand moves around to the back of my pants and slips beneath the elastic band. He grips my ass and just as he lifts his own hips up into me, he uses his hand to press me down against him, harder.

If Embry and I were naked, he would be able to easily push into me, in this position. My legs straddling his thighs opens me to him and I can feel him, pressing into me through my pants; it's the most intense moment I've shared with him so far. Before I can realize I'm speaking to him, my words are out, floating between the two of us. "I want you so bad. I can't wait to feel you like this, inside of me, with nothing between us."

"God. Fuck Lillah," Embry growls from deep in his chest. He releases his hand that is cupping my breast and dances his fingers down my chest and stomach until he reaches my pants. I bite down on my bottom lip when Embry's fingers slip under the cotton fabric and down until they curl into me. He uses his long digits to tease me, to stroke my walls and bring me close to the edge, my hips meeting his powerful thrusts. Just as I think I may have to beg him to make me cum, he presses his thumb against my clit and that's all it takes.

I'm bombarded by all of the clichés; fireworks behind my eyelids, hearing Angels sing. If it's a euphemism used in comparison to a great orgasm, then I'm definitely feeling every single one of them. Embry doesn't stop his movements, neither his fingers between my legs nor his hips beneath mine. There are sounds rolling out of Embry's mouth that I'd pay good money to hear again. I lift my head and open my eyes to look at him and he has the most glorious expression on his face. I know just from the few times I've seen him cum, he's close, so I keep thrusting my hips against him hoping he'll allow himself to let go too.

I place my hands on each side of Embry's face and force him to look into my eyes. His are heavy lidded, his pupils dilated with arousal. My eyelids flutter a little and I battle to keep them focused on him. My body is trying to come down from the amazing heights Embry sent it to. I shudder against him, the walls of my sex quivering and sensitive as I push down to meet him one more time. Embry pulls my face forward, crashing his lips against mine. My hands move up his chest, over his shoulders and into his hair. I tug gently and Embry moans, thrusting up against me one last time. When he starts cumming against me I whimper into his mouth. He feels amazing and it only increases my need to feel him release inside of me, with nothing between us.

He pulls away from our kiss and drops his forehead to rest on my shoulder. In between panting breaths he places kisses along my collar bone and neck. After we both manage to calm a little he looks up at me. Embry's face is a mask of serenity. He rubs my back softly and places quick little kisses on my lips. Once I'm able to focus I finally speak.

"I think from now on, I shouldn't make dinner before you get here. I'm sure it's probably burnt again," I tell him with a satisfied grin on my face.

-0-

"Don't come walking in my room looking all innocent!"

I nearly choke with laughter, "I'm not..."

"My ass. You have the prim and proper look going but I saw you all over Embry on Saturday, while you two were on a 'date'. Plus you went riding motorcycles with Jacob and Ness yesterday. I don't know how you and Ness do it, I wouldn't be able to ride on a motorcycle with Paul," Rachel grins, sitting next to me in one of the student chairs.

Tilting my head, I smile at Rachel, "Why not? It was fun, driving around all day holding on tight to Embry; it was amazing."

"Yeah, we'd barely make it out of the driveway and I'd need Paul," Rachel grins.

I blush but nod, "It was a little hard to focus."

"I bet that wasn't the only thing that was hard," Rachel grins, wiggling her eyebrows.

"Rachel! I'm not going to talk about that." I worry my lower lip between my teeth before finally admitting, "He did finally let me see him naked. Um, are you sure they are all the same size?"

"Yep, pretty sure. Why, is Embry abnormally small?" Rachel is bouncing in her chair.

I shake my head, "No! In fact, he's- HUGE! Not that I'm complaining, but- Wow!"

"I know. Isn't it great? Wait until he's in you," Rachel sighs.

"But it hurts doesn't it, I mean, the first time?" I can feel my face on fire, but I want to ask, given that she's been through this.

Rachel shrugs, "It hurt when he first- but even that first time, once he got going, I didn't even notice the pain." Rachel eyes me, "I thought you said Embry wasn't going to have sex with you."

Glancing down at my hands in my lap I nod, "He did. I'm just hoping I can change his mind."

Rachel laughs, "Good girl! Glad you are finally taking our advice! Go get your wolf."

I shake my head, "Rachel, you're silly."

"But you love me, right?"

Laughing I stand, "Of course I do. How could I not? You're letting me be in your wedding!"

"And we're family now. You have to love me!" Rachel grins, winking at me, "Oh! Speaking of the wedding! We are combining the bachelor and bachelorette party, we're all going out this Saturday. Dinner, dancing, lots of drinking. It will be fun!"

"Do the guys dance?" I try to picture Embry dancing, but somehow I can't make it happen.

Rachel shakes her head, "Sadly, no, mostly just grinding on the floor when someone gets too close to us. But still, it'll be fun! Also, clear your calendar next Wednesday. I have my final dress fitting in Port Angeles. I want all of you to come with me so we can pick out your dresses while we're there. Hopefully no one needs too many alterations."

I shake my head and I hug Rachel quickly, "Ok, consider my calendar cleared for both this Saturday and next Wednesday! I'm so excited. I can't believe you and Paul are getting married so quickly."

"I'm impressed he held out this long. I don't think Embry will give you as much time as Paul gave me," Rachel winks at me as I turn to leave.

I call back over my shoulder, "That's not going to happen, Rachel."

I can hear Rachel's parting shot as I step into the hallway, "Nothing is impossible, Lillah."

-0-

The week both crawls and speeds by. When I'm with Embry, I don't have enough time, when we are apart, time can't pass fast enough. I'm thrilled when I get a text from Embry on Thursday morning.

_Meet you at the diner for lunch?_

I quickly respond back with a "_Yes!_".

My excitement for lunch is diminished slightly when Rachel stops by my room between classes, announcing she, Paul, Sam, and Emily will be joining us at the diner. _There goes spending an enjoyable lunch hour with Embry._ I know I should be excited for time with friends, but I can't when I was looking forward to alone time with Embry.

When Rachel and I walk into the diner, Embry is waiting for me at the door. He hugs me quickly, whispering, "I'm sorry. I told Paul I was having lunch then he and Sam said they were in. Next time, I'll keep my mouth shut."

"It's ok, Embry. Another time," I kiss his cheek before wrapping my hand in his, letting him lead me to the table.

After he makes sure I'm settled he turns to me, "I already ordered for you."

"Oh no. Embry, what did you get me?" I really hope he didn't order something high in fat and carbs, my running schedule has been erratic lately, thanks to him.

He grins at me, "So little faith in me. A salad and the chicken noodle soup; it's getting cold out there."

"Oh." I blush, resting my head against his shoulder, "Thank you."

Embry kisses the top of my head, "Of course."

As we wait for our food the group talks and laughs, giving Paul and Rachel crap about the wedding planning. The both seem to shrug it off, too excited for their upcoming nuptials. I try not to be jealous, but a small part of me wishes it were Embry and I getting married.

I nudge Emily, who's sitting next to me, to get her attention. She turns, grinning, "Hey stranger, finally have time for me?"

"Oh, Emily, I'm sorry-."

Emily easily cuts me off, "Kidding, trust me, I know how it is with these guys. What's up?"

"Nothing, just wondering, where's Eli?"

Emily grins wide, "Little man is at Sue's. She's missed him, she was happy to take him for the afternoon."

"Oh, too bad. I miss the little guy," I frown, realizing it's true. Eli has become as much a part of my heart as the rest of this group.

Emily smiles, "I know the feeling. So Sam told me an interesting rumor the other night."

"What's that?" My heart starts pounding a little faster.

Before Emily can respond, Embry leans over, "Everything ok?"

Emily grins, "Everything is fine, I was just telling Lillah about a little nugget Sam let slip the other night. Something about you phasing in front of Lillah, Embry."

I relax slightly, "Oh, that. Yeah, that happened a couple of days ago."

"Hmmm." Emily locks eyes with Embry. I glance over my shoulder but his face is blank. Emily is grinning when I look back at her, "Well, then you are very lucky, Lillah. That is a special treat usually reserved for immediate family and imprints."

Before I can respond, the food arrives. The table goes quiet immediately. The amount of food the guys order still shocks me, but I can see Rachel and Emily have food similar to mine in front of them.

As I'm just finishing up, I hear my BlackBerry ding in my purse. I grab it, surprised someone is texting me, since most everyone I text is sitting at this table.

Glancing at the screen I see a name I had hoped I'd never see again. _Carter._ He hasn't texted me in the past week so I was hopeful he finally got the hint and moved on, but obviously not.

"Lills, baby what's wrong?" Embry is leaning closer to me. I don't want to upset him, so I try to put the phone back in my purse, but Embry grabs it before I can.

I can easily hear the growl in his chest. Sam and Paul both look up, questioning Embry. He mumbles out, "Fucker won't get a clue."

"Lillah," Paul growls out, "did that asshole Carter text you again?"

"How did you know he's been texting me?"

Embry growls out, "I told him."

Rachel frowns looking between Paul and I, "Carter has been texting you? Why didn't you tell me Lillah? And Paul! You knew and you didn't tell me? You guys and your secrets! This is getting ridiculous!"

Paul growls, "Doesn't matter. Seriously, Lillah that is bull, he needs to stop. No one fucks with our girls."

I'm shocked by Paul's words. I look at Embry, but he's not looking at me, just staring at the screen. I didn't get to see what he said before Embry grabbed my phone. Looking over his shoulder I'm shocked at what's on the screen.

_I'm willing to forgive you for leaving me. Just admit that you miss me._

Embry whispers, "Why does he think you'd want to go back to him?"

I can't answer Embry's question, but I know the truth in my heart. _Because he thinks I'm lonely here in Forks. He doesn't know I could never be with any other man, except Embry._

Paul growls out, "Please, Lillah, just let me kick his ass."

Sam grumbles, "I agree with Paul on this one, Lillah. This guy needs a serious ass kicking. I'd be happy to help."

"No, guys, I appreciate it, but he's not worth it." Moving my hand to cup Embry's cheek, I tilt his face to mine, "I don't know why he won't go away, but I don't ever want to go back to him."

Embry sighs, "Are you sure?"

"Positive. He doesn't even deserve to have his ass kicked by you guys. I'm just going to ignore him." Whispering low, just for Embry, "The only man I care about is sitting next to me."

Embry smiles then nods, "Ok." Looking up at the guys he barks out, "You heard her. For now, we ignore him."

-0-

Friday evening I'm standing at the stove, stirring a gigantic pot of white chili when I hear a knock at the front door. "That's odd," I say to no one but an empty kitchen. I'm expecting Embry for dinner, of course, but he usually doesn't knock- or come to the front door, for that matter. I check the temperature of the eye on the stove and place the spoon next to it before walking toward the living room. I don't bother looking through the window next to the front door because I'm almost positive it's Embry or someone else from the reservation. I jerk the door open and gasp when I see who is standing on my porch, trying to avoid the pouring rain.

"Hello Lillah, it's good to see you."

"Carter," I mutter his name, my arms automatically coming up to cross in front of my body. He's the last person I expected to see. I never would have dreamed that he would dare show his face here, at my house, in my town. My body tenses almost instantly, preparing for a confrontation. "What are you doing here?" I demand. His face shows shock at my angry tone. I'm definitely not the Lillah he used to know and push around.

"What do you mean? I can't come by and see you? I've missed you. Haven't you missed me? I've been trying to text and call you," he tells me, barreling over me, like always. He pushes me aside and walks into the house without being invited.

"No, Carter you can't come by to see me. I haven't missed you," I surprise myself with the strength I hear in my voice. "I've received your calls and messages. Obviously I didn't want to talk to you or I would have replied," I tell him bluntly.

Carter steps toward me, his long stride bringing him closer than I would have liked under any circumstances but with me being home alone, it makes me even more uneasy. I make sure to straighten my spine, refusing to allow him to see any kind of weakness in me. He reaches a hand out and touches my arm but I jerk away before his skin makes contact with mine. I don't want him assuming he's welcome here or that I'm okay with him touching me.

"Don't touch me, Carter."

"Come on, Lilly Flower, I just wanted to talk," he tells me in his fake, sickeningly sweet voice._ I always hated that nickname and when he talked to me like that.  
_  
"I want you to leave. This is my home and you aren't welcome here," I tell him with finality.

"You're going to talk to me. I drove all the way from Seattle to see you." He looks annoyed now, as if it's all my fault he was stupid enough to think I would be willing to accept him being here.

"You wasted your time and gas. Like I said, if I wanted to speak to you, I would have done so already. Now, please leave." This time, my voice is harder, with an edge to it. I'm trying not to panic when he makes it clear that he isn't going to walk away quietly. Carter steps so close to me I can feel the heat from his body. I am definitely not ok with this. In the back of my mind I start to wonder where my cell phone is. If I call someone can they make it here before things start to escalate? As badly as I hate to think it, I know Carter's temperament; this cannot turn out good.

Before I can react Carter has grabbed me by my upper arms, his grip tight enough to make me flinch in pain. "You owe me. You were nothing but a fat, cold bitch! I gave you all the time in the world and didn't pressure you." I open my mouth to reply but his hands tighten on my skin, causing me to gasp. Just as I start to really begin to freak out I hear the most amazing sound imaginable.

"Take your fucking hands off my fucking girlfriend," Embry growls from behind me. I manage to turn my head just enough to see his silhouette. Embry's standing in the kitchen doorway, body shaking with anger. He takes about two seconds to cross the room. Before Carter can react Embry has him ripped away from me and pushed up against the wall next to the still open front door.

Carter opens his mouth to speak and I cringe, knowing this can't turn out well if he says something to incite Embry even more. "Girlfriend?" he asks with a barking laugh. "Lillah might be stupid but she's not dumb enough to stoop so low she'd be with you," he looks Embry up and down, snarling.

Embry slams him against the wall again and the pictures behind Carter bounce around before one of them falls, hitting the floor. Embry has one of his forearms against Carter's neck, holding him so he can't move his head. His other arm is clenched in a fist, ready to punch.

Carter's words make me furious and before Embry can say anything I step forward, "You don't know _anything_ about Embry. Don't you dare try to judge someone that I care for. Embry is the man that I want to be with. My days with you and your childishness are over, Carter. I should have ended that a long time ago. I was weak then; I'm not anymore."

Carter grins at Embry and I hold my breath, afraid of what he might say now. "Poor guy, prepare for your balls to fall off from the Ice Queen's lack of desire. She's going to tease the fuck out of you, sashaying around here in those skirts of hers. I bet her pussy is duct taped shut."

My eyes grow wide and I hear Embry growl so menacingly I'd be afraid of him if I didn't know another side of him. "Embry, Embry," I say his name in a soft voice, hoping to pull him back from whatever cliff he's about to jump off of. I don't hesitate to step behind him and place my hands on his back, rubbing gently. I look at Carter, meeting his angry eyes before smirking. I shock all three of us with the next words that leave my mouth. "Carter, I can assure you, although you may have made me believe it for years, I'm not made of ice. Embry has done a fine job of proving that more than once. Don't you worry about the health of his balls. I'm making sure they are _well_ taken care of."

I know it was a childish thing to do, telling him our private business, but I couldn't help myself. Letting Carter know I'm not frigid with all men, that it was only him, makes me feel vindicated for all of the times he made me feel worthless. I also want to make sure Embry knows Carter's words should have zero meaning to him. Embry is the only man that matters to me now. Regardless of if Embry wanted to be with me in the future, I would never go back to Carter; I hope they both know this. Before Carter can say anything I kiss Embry's shoulder and tell him to release Carter. Embry tenses but I go on to explain that Carter is going to leave as soon as he is free and that he will never step foot on my property again.

Carter gives both Embry and I a look that is filled with rage but I can't seem to make myself care or be worried. There isn't a doubt in my mind that Embry will always protect me. Once the front door is closed, Embry locks it up and turns to look at me. I can still see the anger in his eyes but he doesn't seem as irate as before. I go over everything that just occurred and a slow grin spreads across my face. "You're girlfriend, huh? I wasn't aware you had one."

"Oh, um- yeah, about that," Embry begins shuffling his feet back and forth and if I didn't know better, I'd say he was embarrassed.

"If you want me to be your girlfriend, Embry, all you have to do is ask."

"I just didn't think- Aren't we a little old for that label?"

"What else do you call the person you are dating exclusively? I know I'm not seeing anyone else." I nibble on my bottom lip before finally confessing, "Embry, I don't consider you just a friend."

Embry's eyes grow wide, but his smile spreads wider, "I don't see you as just a friend either, Lillah. You are so much more than that to me. I'm not seeing anyone other than you. I don't want to see anyone else." He takes a deep breath then meets my gaze head on, "Lillah, will you be my girlfriend?" The way he says it almost makes me laugh. He sounds like a thirteen year old boy asking a girl on his first date.

"Embry," I tell him and step as close as I can, "I would love to be your girlfriend."

-0-

**A/N:** Everyone together now "awwww". Are we all happy to see Carter get a little bit of a tiny ass kicking? (Ok, we agree, he deserves more than that). We hope y'all are happy with how things have gone so far. Don't you love a little Lillah/Ness time?

Be sure to follow us on Twitter (StupidLeeches). We like to tweet and chat with everyone and try to answer as many questions as we can without giving away too much. And check our site often for other updates. We are going to start posting polls and discussions there in the near future (regarding our next stories) - you can register to receive our blog entries through email too - stupidleeches[dot]com

See y'all next Tuesday! Leave lots of love on this chapter for NKR to read when she comes back from vacation.


	27. Chapter 27 Say Goodbye to my Heart

**Chapter 27 "Say Goodbye To My Heart"**

**Disclaimer:** Oh, SM DEFINITELY didn't write this chapter or this story. She just owns everything else.

**A/N:** A little note from our beta (dailyicandy), "Me thinks I made it a little more lemony O_O *giggles*" In case you need more warning, these two get hot & heavy in this one. You've been warned.

_Here we go again, I kinda wanna be more than friends  
So take it easy on me, I'm afraid, you're never satisfied  
Here we go again, we're sick like animals, we play pretend  
You're just a cannibal  
And I'm afraid, I won't get out alive, I won't sleep tonight  
Oh oh, I want some more  
Oh oh, what are you waiting for  
Take a bite of my heart tonight  
Oh oh, I want some more  
Oh oh, what are you waiting for  
What are you waiting for  
Say goodbye to my heart tonight_  
"Animal" - Neon Trees

**EPOV**

"I've noticed you've been more quiet on patrols lately, does that mean things are good with Lillah?"

Jacob and I are doing a quick debrief after having just finished patrols Friday evening. While I'm anxious to see Lillah, it's nice to have the chance to catch up with Jacob.

"Yeah, things are good. Is Ness coming out with us tomorrow? She is in the wedding, after all."

Jacob grins wide, "Hell yeah she's joining! We can't stay out all night, Edward would flip, but he agreed to let her come out. I have to double check that Rachel is taking us to an eighteen and up bar. Edward barely agreed to her being eighteen on her I.D., he about lost it when Emmett suggested Jasper get her a twenty-one year old I.D."

I growl, the image of that little girl quickly coming to my mind, "I suddenly don't blame Edward. If Ness were my daughter, I'd flip if she were going out, especially with one of us."

Jacob elbows me, hard, in the ribs, "Look at you, getting all protective of an imaginary daughter. Any chance you want to start working on a kid with Lillah by going ahead and accepting her tonight?"

I narrow my eyes at Jacob, "Don't think I don't know what you are up to. I remember you bet 'six days'. By my math, that bet was six days ago."

"Come on man, this isn't for me and the damn bet! I care about you, I want to see you happy and settled down with Lillah. Look how happy you've been lately," Jacob grins.

I shake my head, turning back to the woods, "You're a terrible liar, Jacob. If anything changes in my relationship with Lillah, you'll be the first to know."

"Sure, sure. See you tomorrow at the shop. Depending on what the girls want to do we might skip patrols," Jacob calls after me.

I don't turn, just give a thumbs up before pulling off my jeans and phasing. I'm ready to get home to see Lillah. I can't wait to spend a quiet evening with her tonight and I'm looking forward to the rest of the weekend.

-0-

When I don't see Lillah on the back porch I go ahead and pull on my jeans. While she hasn't yet shown up naked, she has been waiting for me in that swing every night since Sunday. When she's waiting for me on the swing, I don't bother getting dressed, it's not worth it since I know my woman is waiting for me. The best part is, she never disappoints me. It's getting harder and harder to not make love to her, especially with her becoming so comfortable with me. The other night I pulled her pants down like an idiot and nearly took her while she rode me. She was so wet and ready and my dick was right there at her entrance. I managed to pull back in time, but I don't know how much longer I can deny both of us that connection.  
_  
I need to make her mine. _

_Yeah, but what if she doesn't love you? What happens when you make love to her and she leaves? _

_She said yesterday the only man she cares for is me; that she didn't ever want to go back to that asshole Carter. _

_What if it isn't Carter, what if she leaves with another man?_

My mind is whirling as I walk in the house, heading for the kitchen when I smell the food cooking. Walking in, I find the kitchen empty, but a pot on the stove. The temperature isn't on low, so I assume Lillah is around somewhere. I decide to check for her in the bedroom but stop in my tracks when I hear her voice, "I want you to leave. This is my home and you aren't welcome here."

Her voice is even but there is a tone to it; strong, but scared. When I hear a male voice I don't recognize I take a step closer, "You're going to talk to me. I drove all the way from Seattle to see you."

_Seattle? No fucking way. That ass bag would not dare show his face here._

I know I need to let Lillah manage this, but I can already feel myself starting to shake. Her words are rough now, like she's pissed, but again, there's something else. _Fear._ "You wasted your time and gas. Like I said, if I wanted to speak to you, I would have done so already. Now, please leave."

"You owe me. You were nothing but a fat, cold bitch! I gave you all the time in the world and didn't pressure you."

I run as fast as I can, stopping short in the doorway of the kitchen when I see him with his hands on her. He is clutching her by her biceps and I can tell right away that he's hurting her. I growl out, "Take your fucking hands off my fucking girlfriend."

I don't waste my time, grabbing the asshole off of Lillah, pushing him against the nearest wall. Seeing the open front door I debate throwing him out on the porch, but then I wouldn't get to choke him with my bare hands like I want to. Then again, if I throw him out, then I can phase and rip his throat out for daring to talk to her like that.

This guy is a dumb ass, even pinned up against a wall by my arm he won't shut the fuck up, "Girlfriend? Lillah might be stupid but she's not dumb enough to stoop so low she'd be with you."

He actually has the balls to snarl at me. Barely able to control my rage, I slam him back against the wall again, this time causing a picture to fall with the force. I pull my fist back to punch the jerk, not caring what he thinks of me when I feel Lillah step forward. I want to yell at her to let me handle this but I can't, not when I hear what she has to say.

"You don't know _anything_ about Embry. Don't you dare try to judge someone that I care for. Embry is the man that I want to be with. My days with you and your childishness are over, Carter. I should have ended that a long time ago. I was weak then; I'm not anymore."

I'm so surprised by Lillah's words that I nearly drop the pansy. Before I can say anything to Lillah, the fucker gives me a sick grin, "Poor guy, prepare for your balls to fall off from the Ice Queen's lack of desire. She's going to tease the fuck out of you, sashaying around here in those skirts of hers. I bet her pussy is duct taped shut."

_No one fucking talks about Lillah that way and lives to talk about it. She is mine._ I'm pretty sure I could rip his head off with one hand I'm so angry right now.

"Embry, Embry," Lillah's hands gently rubbing against my back relaxes me only slightly. I still want to slam my fist into that smug grin on his face, maybe break a few of those fake teeth off. I bet I could hit him hard enough to knock the last few stands of fine blonde hair off the top of his head.

I'm contemplating accidentally-on purpose breaking his shoulder when Lillah says in the most confident voice I've ever heard her use, "Carter, I can assure you, although you may have made me believe it for years, I'm not made of ice. Embry has done a fine job of proving that more than once. Don't you worry about the health of his balls. I'm making sure they are _well_ taken care of."

"Embry," Lillah places a kiss against my shoulder, whispering, "let him go."

"Lills," I tense, not wanting to release him. I want to punish him for even thinking about coming near Lillah.

Lillah practically purrs against me, mumbling, "He's going to leave as soon as you let him go. He's also never going to step foot on my property again. Right?"

The jerk has the nerve to look pissed at both of us as I quickly pull my arm back. He barely catches himself from falling to his knees. _Too bad_, I could have _accidentally_ connected my knee with his nose if he had. He snarls as he walks out, but I quickly slam the door behind him, locking it before turning back to Lillah.

Looking at her I realize how close he came to her. I want to check her pale, delicate skin for bruises. He had such a tight grip on her, tighter than I would ever consider holding her, that I'm sure he left marks. _I really should have kicked his ass when I had the chance._

"You're girlfriend, huh? I wasn't aware you had one."

Lillah's words pull me out of my own head. It takes me a moment to realize what she even said, let alone what she's talking about. I realize in my anger I used the term for Lillah that I've been trying out in my head for the last few days. Shifting nervously, I glance up at her, "Oh, um- yeah, about that."

"If you want me to be your girlfriend, Embry, all you have to do is ask," Lillah doesn't blush, or laugh. _That's a good sign, right?_

"I just didn't think-," I stop, cutting myself off. Catching her eye, I ask one of my concerns with the title, "Aren't we a little old for that label?"

My heart soars at Lillah's response, "What else do you call the person you are dating exclusively? I know I'm not seeing anyone else." Lillah nipping at her bottom lip holds my attention until she speaks, barely above a whisper, "Embry, I don't consider you just a friend."

I can't remember a time I've had a bigger smile on my face. It hurts from grinning like an idiot, but I don't care.

"I don't see you as just a friend either, Lillah." I confess, finally getting closer to the truth with her, "You are so much more than that to me. I'm not seeing anyone other than you. I don't want to see anyone else."

Gulping in as much air as possible, I lock my gaze with hers, "Lillah, will you be my girlfriend?"

Lillah speaks the most precious words I've ever heard, "Embry, I would love to be your girlfriend."

"Seriously?" I don't mean to sound so surprised, but I can't help it.

She wraps her arms around my neck, tugging my head down to hers. She brushes her lips back and forth over mine, whispering, "Embry, don't listen to him. You are an amazing man and I would be proud to be your girlfriend."

"It's not him, Lillah, but he was right, you can do better than me."

Lillah frowns, taking a step back from me. I expect her to yell at me, but instead, she just turns and walks into the kitchen. _Shit._ I've already fucked this up and she hasn't even been my girlfriend five minutes.

When I walk in the kitchen she's at the stove, stirring the contents in the pot. She doesn't look up at me when she speaks, "Dinner's ready. Grab the wine?"

"Lillah?" I watch as she scoops up the food from the pot and places it in two bowls.

"I made white chili tonight, I hope you like-," I walk up behind her, spinning her around after she puts the bowls down. Leaning forward I lower my lips to hers. Her heart pounding against my chest worries me more that I've upset her.

Pulling back slightly I do the only thing I can think of; apologize, "Lillah, I'm sorry."

Lillah shakes her head, smiling softly, "I'm not mad, Embry, I'm sad that you think that way about yourself. Go grab the drinks, I'll try to explain over dinner."

She moves out of my arms, grabbing the bowls and silverware. I stand frozen in place. _Sad? What?_

"Embry?"

Shaking my head, I grab the drinks from the refrigerator. I set them down at the table and move to help Lillah into her normal seat, but she refuses, "Sit down, Embry."

Too surprised by the turn in this conversation, I sit down. Lillah then grabs her bowl and drink and comes around the table, sitting down in my lap.

"Embry, before I met you, I can't remember a man outside of my own family holding a chair for me," Lillah spoons some chili, blows on it then offers it to me. I take it without question, enjoying the combination of textures and spices.

"Is it good?" She grins at me.

"Of course it's good, baby. You are an amazing cook," I smile back at her, taking her bowl and spooning a bite for her. She closes her eyes and I'm drawn to her lips, following their movement around the spoon.

Her eyes pop open a few seconds later. She is once again smiling, "Thanks. I didn't actually cook that much until I moved here, even though I loved cooking. When I was dating Carter he preferred to go out. It was a status symbol for him, a way for him to been seen, especially with me."

Considering her words, I barely realize when she hands me my bowl then takes her's out of my hand. We eat in silence for a few minutes. Lillah actually finishes hers quickly, setting her bowl down on the table. When she sees I'm finishing up, she starts talking.

"Ok, so here's the best explanation I can come up with for you. Remember how upset you got when I would dismiss you calling me beautiful?"

My heart sinks, "Oh no, Lillah. I thought we were moving past that."

Lillah brushes a hand against my cheek, "Shhh. Embry, let me explain. I have been trying lately to believe you." Lillah exhales, glancing down to her lap as she speaks, "What I'm saying is that when you would get upset about me not believing you, that's how I feel when you say you aren't good enough for me."

I don't know how to respond. As I'm thinking through her words Lillah looks up again. There are tears sparkling in her eyes, which breaks my heart, "Embry, I can't do better than you. Status, money, power; I don't care about those things. I care about you. You are a wonderful, gentle, insanely protective, stubborn, strong, caring, beautiful, amazing man. I want to be your girlfriend because I'm honored that you would even consider _me_ worthy of being with _you_."

The only thing I can think to say to her in response is how I really feel. _I love her._ No matter how much I try to fight it, I can't deny it any longer, I _love_ Lillah. I haven't even known this woman a full month, and yet, I love her. Unable to yet speak these words aloud I do the only thing I know to do. I pull her against me, showing my feelings for her through my kiss.

This kiss isn't rushed, but it is intense. The emotions are there for me and I feel I'm getting the same back from Lillah. When we finally separate, both gasping for air, I manage to think beyond my emotions, hearing her words again in my mind.

Moving my hands to the back of her head, I bury my fingers in her beautiful hair as I brush my lips against hers, "Lillah, everything that you just described me as, works for you too. Even protective. It would have been so easy for me to phase in front of that asshole earlier. You kept me sane, protected my secret when I couldn't."

"Embry, if you are my boyfriend now," Lillah grins wide, "then that means it's not just _your_ secret. We are a team. It's _our_ secret." My heart is pounding so fast I'm sure she can feel it against her chest, but she doesn't say anything, just keeps grinning. _This woman is absolutely amazing._

Lillah rubs her nose against mine, "But I do have to disagree with you on one thing. I'm not stubborn, Embry."

Dropping my hands from her hair, I lean back as I howl in laughter. When I manage to get myself under control again, I see Lillah has her arms crossed over her chest and she has a small frown on her face, "What? I am not!"

"Lillah, you're beautiful."

She blushes softly, her eyes dropping from me as her hands push gently against my chest, "Be serious, Embry."

"That's where you're stubborn. I am being serious. You are the most beautiful woman I know or ever want to know." I kiss her nose then grin wide, whispering against her lips, "My beautiful girlfriend, Lillah."

Her cheeks turn a deeper shade of pink but she giggles, kissing my nose in return, "My Wolf Charming. My handsome boyfriend, Embry."

"'Wolf Charming'?" I'm chuckling under my breath, "I thought you said I was stubborn."

Lillah shrugs, "You are stubborn, but you are also tall, dark, and handsome. If this were a fairy tale, you'd be Prince Charming."

"You sure I'm not the big, bad wolf?" I pretend to pout.

"Hmmm," Lillah nibbles on her bottom lip then slowly slides her hands down my chest, stopping just above my jeans, "Some parts of you are big, bad wolf," she winks at me, grinning wide as she continues, "But even then, you're still my Wolf Charming."

"You're weird, Lillah Hunter," I chuckle, mimicking her words from last weekend.

She nuzzles my neck, but I can feel her smile, "Why am I weird?"

I shake my head, "I don't know anyone else that would describe me as 'charming'."

Lillah moves up my neck, whispering against my ear, "That's why you are _my_ Wolf Charming, _my_ boyfriend. Only I get to see the gentle, caring, _charming_ side of you."

I can't hide the grin that spreads across my face when I hear her words. _Boyfriend._ I don't think I'll ever get accustomed to that. Not only does the simple word make my heart speed up, but the tone of voice she says it in makes me insanely happy as well. Her voice sounds shy but happy, her tone gentle and-_ loving_. A shock of electricity moves up my spine; I'd give anything if she really felt that way about me. I turn my face and kiss the side of her neck before pulling back to look at her. Lillah has the most serene and beautiful look on her face. I can't help but move in and touch my lips to hers, "And only I get to see the wild, uninhibited side of the prim and proper Ms. Hunter. My beautiful girlfriend has the sweetest kisses and a mouth that drives me wild."

Lillah smiles against my mouth and I playfully nip at her bottom lip. She places her hands on each side of my face and I pull back slightly to look at her.

"I'm only wild and uninhibited with you because _you_ make me feel that way. I feel like I can never get enough of you, Embry." Lillah's finger tips scratch the stubble on my face and it makes me grin at her, recalling her telling me she likes scruff. She returns my smile before moving back in for another kiss, this time teasing my top lip with the tip of her tongue before we both open our mouths to one another. Lillah's candy tongue slips into my mouth and I deepen the kiss, pulling her closer to me with my hands in her hair. I tug it gently, experimenting, and I am rewarded with Lillah moaning into my kiss. I could definitely get use to this new, bolder side of my woman.

On impulse I bring my hands down to her luscious hips and lift her from my lap. She whimpers in protest but stops quickly when I place her sexy ass on the table top. Our lips break apart with this new position but I don't waste my time and busy my mouth in other ways. I push Lillah's shirt up over her stomach and lean forward to kiss it, sucking around her belly button before dipping my tongue into it. Lillah's stomach quivers and I grin when she tosses her head back, mumbling my name. I love being able to make her feel things she's never felt before. The look on her face when she feels something new makes me crazy, "I know I can't ever get enough of you, Lillah. Every part of your body turns me on."

I move up Lillah's torso, kissing her soft skin gently after disposing of her shirt. Her hands move over my shoulders then up my neck into my hair; her fingers threading through to massage my scalp. I lift my head to look at her, wanting to pound my chest when I see her eyes closed with the most serene look on her face. She is so beautiful. _I'm such a lucky bastard._

Her eyes pop open and she looks at me with surprise. When she grins at me I realize I must have spoke that last part out loud. _Oh well, it's the truth._ I half stand from my chair, needing to kiss her lips. She leans into me, bringing my face closer to hers with her grip on my hair. Before I'm able to deepen our kiss she pulls back, smiling sweetly, "I'm pretty lucky myself, Embry."

I shake my head in amazement and drop my face into her neck, kissing at her tender skin and moving down to her collar bone, making my way to her delicate shoulder. When I reach her arm I remember dickweed's grip on her and I lift my head to check her out. Her skin is slightly bruised already and it makes a growl rumble in my chest. I can't believe he would dare put his hands on her that way. I feel bad for any woman that is lured into his trap. No one deserves that kind of disrespect.

Placing my lips against her creamy skin I kiss over every inch of fingerprint bruise on first one arm, then the other. Seeing how he hurt her makes me want to take off and chase him down. I'm afraid of what I might have done to him if Lillah hadn't been there to stop me. The last thing I want is to do something that might take me away from her.

Lillah scratches the back of my neck softly and I glance up at her. She looks worried and I don't understand why until I realize the growl never stopped. I try to smile at her, "I'm ok."

She doesn't say anything but she leans down a little to kiss me. I stand fully and use my foot to push the chair out of my way so I can stand between her legs. My hands land on her thighs and I push them a little further apart to accommodate my hips. Lillah wraps her legs around me without hesitation and I place my hands on her hips, pulling her closer to me.

"Embry," her sweet voice brings me out of my fog and I look up at her questioningly. "Why is it I always end up the one naked?" she asks with a sassy grin.

I laugh, happy for the change in subject. Kissing her forehead I whisper to her, "Because you have the most beautiful body I could ever imagine, and it should _never_ be covered." I explain matter-of-factly. "Plus, if we are both naked, it's hard for me to control myself."

I watch Lillah's expression as she looks up at me and her cheeks flame. "What if I don't want you to control yourself?" The implication of her words makes my dick go hard. It's a good thing we are both mostly clothed. Hearing her give her honest opinion like that could push me over the edge and make me do something I might hate myself for later.

Instead of arguing with her or saying anything else in return, I take the opportunity to devour her pouty lips. Lillah truly has the most amazing mouth. I would be perfectly happy kissing it for the rest of the night. I press my chest against hers, feeling her nipples harden through my shirt. I grin against her mouth when I feel her shiver beneath my hands, which have moved from her thighs, to her hips and up her back. I'm touching her as gently as possible, afraid my calloused hands may be too coarse on her satiny skin. I always have to be sure I touch her with gentleness. I can't ever harm her on accident; she is too precious, too perfect and unmarred.

"Em?" My eyes easily find hers, "What's going on? What are you thinking about?"

Tilting my head I move to the skin below her chin, "I'm thinking how beautiful and precious you are. I'm also thinking about how perfect and unmarred your skin is, well, expect for where assface touched you."

"My skin isn't perfect, Embry," Lillah smiles softly at me. She drops kisses over every part of my face she can reach, "My boyfriend has left his mark all over my body."

"What? I have? Lillah, I'm so sorry. I try my best to be gentle with you," I'm stunned to realize I have left marks on her creamy skin.

"Em, you worry too much about me. I'm not as delicate as you think I am. Yes, I bruise easily, but bruises heal. The marks you leave on my skin are from the passion we have for one another. I love those marks, as long as my students can't see them," Lillah winks at me.

I lightly run my fingers over the bruises on her arms, "No man should use his strength to hurt a woman."

"That is just one of the many reasons why you are so special, Embry. You never hurt me, in fact, sometimes you are almost too gentle," Lillah wiggles her eyebrows at me.

"Lillah," I growl out in warning. She doesn't understand the power she holds over me, it wouldn't take much for me to give in to every one of her demands.

Sighing gently she looks up at me, "I know, Embry. All I'm saying is the way he touched me hurt, but that's why he's my ex-boyfriend. My Wolf Charming would never hurt me like that."

"Of course I wouldn't hurt you, Lillah, I don't ever want to see you in pain." My teeth close around her earlobe, "But I might tease you a little bit."

Lillah giggles, her fingers in my hair tug me back from her skin, "That's fine, just remember, turnabout is fair play.

"I'm fine with that," I wink at her, feeling like a lovesick fool but enjoying every moment with Lillah. I speak as I kiss across her chin, "How about we do a quick clean up then I give my beautiful girlfriend a massage?" I want nothing more than to touch her skin, showing her with gentle caresses how precious she is.

When I reach her chin, Lillah dips her head to meet my lips, smiling as she kisses me, "Sounds good to me. Do I get to give my boyfriend a massage in return?"

Stepping back from the table I help her down, grinning when I kiss the top of her head, "Maybe."

-0-

Lillah's hand is clutching mine as we step into her bedroom. She put her shirt back on while we cleaned up the dinner dishes. I was tempted to ask her to keep it off but I was afraid she would be a little too uncomfortable with that. I watch as she walks across the room, closing blinds and curtains. She comes back out of the bathroom with a container in her hand and a shy smile on her face. She amazes me, one second she's confident and upfront, another second she's blushing and bashful. I find these two sides of her personality unbelievably sexy. When I reach her she passes me what is in her hand and I look down at it. What I see makes me grin like a fool, "Massage oil?"

"Yes," she tells me with a blush creeping up her neck. _Could she be any sexier?_

"Do I want to know why you have massage oil? Better question, do I want to know who has used it on you?" I can feel a growl building in my chest at the thought of any other man touching her.

"No one has Embry, it's still sealed," she reassures me.

When I pop the top off I see that it is, indeed, still sealed up. Relieved, I can't help the chuckle that bursts from my chest. "How long have you had it?" _Why would she buy massage oil if she wasn't dating someone?_

"Embry, I adore you, but sometimes, you ask too many questions. I thought you were going to treat me to a massage."

"Ah yes, you are correct, I am supposed to be doing that," I lead her to the side of the bed she always sleeps on and have her sit on the edge. I kneel on the floor, slipping the socks from her feet before putting my hands on her hips to pull her pants off. She automatically lifts her hips as I slowly expose the lower half of her body.

Once I have the pants removed, I drop my forehead down to rest on her knee. _She's not wearing any panties. Sweet mother of God_. Moving my head side to side I take a deep breath before looking up at her. She grins sheepishly at me as I reach for the edge of her shirt. I begin to slowly pull it up over her torso, revealing the top half of her beautiful body little by little. As I pull her shirt up to reveal her breasts I watch in fascination as her nipples pebble under my stare. Pulling my gaze away I look up at her face, wanting to make sure she's ok.

Lillah's soft smile tells me what I need to know. Tossing her shirt onto the bed I lean close to touch my lips to hers. After pulling away from her kiss I move down her jaw to her ear and over her neck, nibbling gently when I reach her collar bone.

"Why don't you lay down on your stomach? Get comfortable," I tell her and move to stand. She does as I ask while I pull my shirt and jeans off, climbing onto the bed in just my boxers. It's become a habit to be _nearly_ naked when with Lillah. I should probably bring a pair of sweats to keep here when I don't want to wear my jeans. _Just in case._

I sit back, taking the time to run my eyes over Lillah's lush body. I reach out and run my finger tips over the curve of her shoulder, then down her spine to the dip of her lower back. Her skin is covered in goose bumps everywhere I touch. I flatten my hand against her back, rubbing gently from the base of her spine up to her shoulder blades and back down again. When I feel her body begin to relax I reach for the massage oil off of the night stand, but before I can begin to rub it into her skin I'm hit with an idea. Changing my plans, I request that she sit up instead. Lillah looks confused but does as I ask. I lean back against the pillows then quickly pull her between my legs. I grin when I hear Lillah chuckle and say, "This is a little familiar."

"Yes, it is. I hope you don't mind a little recreating?" I lean down and kiss the side of her neck, brushing her hair out of the way with my hand.

"No, I certainly," Lillah sighs a moan, "don't mind."

I squirt a little massage oil into the palm of my hand and put the cap back on it before rubbing my hands together and placing them on Lillah's shoulders. Kneading softly, I'm conscious of the bruises that bastard left on her body. When my hands run along her upper arms I lighten my touch to just my finger tips then stroke back to her shoulders. I watch my hands glide over her satiny skin. With the oil her skin now glistens under the lamp light, her light smattering of freckles standing out against her pale skin. I lean down and kiss her skin, flicking my tongue out, realizing the massage oil Lillah had stowed in her bathroom is flavored. I lift my head and whisper in her ear, "Caramel?" A giggle escapes her lips but she doesn't say anything, only nods her head.

"How long have you had this stuff?" I ask again casually.

"It was in a gift basket my mom gave me for Christmas. All holiday themed bath stuff. I used all of the other products but I haven't really had a reason- you know, to use massage oil," she explains awkwardly.

"I'm definitely going to make sure we make up for lost time then," I move my hands down, paying close attention to her lower back. Something about this spot fascinates me. I run my hands over each of her hips then up her sides, making her shiver and giggle when I tickle her sensitive skin. I don't slow my progress, instead moving my hands to just below her breasts. I slide them back down, then up again, this time cupping her breasts gently. I know this is supposed to be about Lillah but I can't help myself, my need for her is too great to just massage her. Lillah leans back against my chest and I nearly forget all about what we are doing here; that I'm supposed to be treating her, _not_ myself.

"You have beautiful skin, baby. Milky and smooth," I tell her without thinking. Lillah turns her head just slightly and I drop my face down to kiss her lips. She mutters a "Thank you" against my mouth and we both grin. _God, I want this woman_. I take the opportunity to rub the pads of my thumbs against each of her breasts. She gasps into my mouth and turns her face away, trying to pull air into her lungs. I'm such a pervy bastard but I can't help myself. I slide my hands down from her breasts to her stomach then her hips, pulling her back into me, letting her feel my growing hard on.

Lillah moans at the contact, digging her hands into my thighs as she grinds her ass against me. My fingers tighten on her hips but I'm torn which direction I want to move them; my mind tells me to slow her down, my dick says to pull her closer to me. Managing to ignore my dick for the moment, I push her hips forward just a little bit. I hear her little whimper at the loss of contact. Moving my hands back to her shoulders I get back to the task at hand, whispering, "Patience, baby. I promise, it will be worth the wait."

Sighing softly, she turns her head to me, "That's also a little familiar."

"Did I break my promise?" I wink back at her.

Lillah drops her head onto my shoulder, licking at the edge of my jaw, "No, everything with you so far has been amazing Embry, always worth the wait. I think you know my body better than I do."

"If it makes you feel any better," moving my hands down her arm, I lace our fingers together, "you have been a very quick study of my body. When you touch me, I lose any semblance of control."

"Then it sounds like we are even," Lillah turns slowly around, her eyes locked on mine. Her cheeks darken slightly before she whispers, "Is it my turn to massage you?"

"I suppose, but you really don't have to. I just love touching you," I'm hesitating, trying to give her an out if she wants it.

"Embry, give me the bottle, take off your boxers, lay down on your stomach and get comfortable," Lillah holds one hand out for the massage oil while the other rests on her hip. She's so damn sexy like this, telling me what to do, what she wants.

I don't want to disappoint her, but I'm still nervous about losing control with her tonight. One slip and I could make a horrible mistake. I speak softly, "Ok Lills, but I'm not so sure about the boxers. I think I need to leave those on to protect you."

Lillah crosses her arms over her chest, leaning back from me, "Embry, you are my boyfriend now. I appreciate you protecting me from evil things, but you don't need to protect me from me. Or from you. Now take off those boxers."

Grinning like a fool at the sexy woman in front of me, I stand from the bed, chuckling, "Yes, Girlfriend."

Before I can climb back in bed, Lillah crawls to the edge, looking at my now exposed erection. She lightly scratches her nails up my thighs as she places kisses all over my chest, "You are the most beautiful man ever, Embry."

Cupping her chin until she looks up at me, I chuckle, "Men aren't beautiful, silly Lills. Women are beautiful. Men are handsome or hot, or even sexy."

"Mmmm, yes, you are handsome, hot, and sexy, but you're also beautiful," she slides back from the edge, my body already missing the contact with her. She sits on her knees, waiting for me to get comfortable. I climb back onto the bed and maneuver my body, adjusting my dick so it doesn't break when I lay on my stomach. _I'm not even joking_. I can't even sleep on my stomach any more_. Between falling asleep with Lillah wrapped around me and thinking about her when we are apart, I'm a walking hard on._ I finally manage to get in a comfortable position and I feel Lillah move next to me, her slight weight dipping the mattress as she kneels by my side.

Turning my head so I can see her, I grin as I watch her pull her bottom lip into her mouth, her eyes locked on my back. _Back to the oh-so-sexy shy Lillah. _When I can't contain my laughter, Lillah's eyes move to my face. She narrows her eyes, huffing, "What?"

"Nothing, you're just adorable. What are you thinking about?"

"I was just thinking how best to go about this. Where I could sit so I can touch all of you," Lillah's eyes again move to my back. Her cheeks darken before she gives me a look I've seen only a couple of times. _She has an idea. This usually doesn't work out well for my control. _"Um- since you claim I weigh next to nothing, what if I- straddled your back?"

The groan escapes automatically. The thought of feeling her against my back, especially as turned on as we both are, it's too much. "Lills, I don't think that's a good idea."

"In that case," before I can say anything Lillah is swinging her leg around me and I feel her sink against my lower back. She leans forward, her bare breasts crushed to my back as she runs her tongue along the outside of my ear, whispering, "I think it's a great idea. You worry too much, Embry." As she leans back, I feel how wet she is. Her soaking pussy pressing against my back; I let out a growl as I feel myself grow harder. _Fuck. _

I bite my tongue, wanting to disagree, but not wanting to start an argument with her. Next thing I know, I feel drops of oil hit my skin then Lillah's fingers brushing the oil all over my back and up over my shoulders. She slides her hands up to my hair line, her fingers kneading the skin as she hums softly. My eyes close on their own, her soft sounds and gentle touches relaxing me.

"Embry, have you always had short hair?" Her hands move slowly over my shoulders, touching every part.

Focusing my mind on where her fingers are touching me and not where I can feel her heat building, I try to form a cohesive response to her question, "No, before I started phasing I had longer hair, around my shoulders. Why?"

"I think I'd like to see it longer. Why'd you cut it when you started phasing?" Her fingers glide over my neck, running along my jaw line.

"It was getting in my eyes when I was a wolf."

Unable to take it anymore, I quickly flip over, grabbing her by the hips to keep her straddled against my chest. She gasps in surprise, her eyes wide, "What was that?"

"I don't like not being able to see you." I shrug, but grin when her hands continue their movements around my neck.

She grabs the bottle of oil and lets a couple of drops fall across my shoulders. Her fingers are once again moving over my skin, this time with a little added pressure. I sigh enjoying the feeling of her exploring my body, my eyes again closing.

"Embry," my eyes open at her soft whisper of my name. She's smiling down at me, "You aren't falling asleep are you?"

My chuckle is automatic, "No, not falling asleep, just focusing on your touch. It's easier than thinking about all the things I want to do to you."

Lillah's eyes grow slightly, but her voice is soft when she speaks, "What kind of things?"

Her fingers dance over my biceps as I debate on what to tell her. When I don't answer right away she leans forward, her tongue flicking out over the skin of my neck. Moving her lips up my neck she whispers against my ear, "The caramel tastes delicious on your skin. I think my boyfriend is my new favorite dessert."

Turning my head to capture her lips I mumble in between kisses, "You've been my favorite dessert since we first met, Girlfriend."

"Really? You sure you didn't hate me when we first met?"

I frown, remembering those first few days after I imprinted, "No, I've never hated you, Lillah. I'm sorry- sorry for how I acted before."

Lillah nods then slides her lips over mine again, gently, slowly, "It's ok, Embry. Now, what kind of things are you wanting to do with me?"

Pulling her bottom lip into my mouth, I suck gently until she moans my name. Releasing her lip I grin, "How about I show you?"

I smile when a whimper escapes her lips before she nods slowly. I pull her lips to mine, slowly sliding my tongue against hers. The more our lips move against one another the more Lillah squirms over my body, her breasts sliding over my chest easily because of the oil. I can also feel her hips moving back and forth, against my lower hips. My cock is so close to her wet lips it would be so easy to push into her; to finally take her and make her completely mine. But I remind myself I can't do that until she knows the truth. _Soon. I will tell her soon._ For now I will focus on pleasing her, making her see how much I want her, need her.

I run my hands down her back, bringing them to each of her hips, pulling her body closer against mine. I moan her name; when she whimpers it's nearly all I can do not to give in to everything my body is screaming at me to do to her. Lillah's wet pussy grinds against my abdomen and I can't stop the rumble that vibrates from my chest. She gasps for air, pulling away from our kiss but she doesn't go too far. Her mouth lands on the side of my neck, licking and sucking at my skin. Her mouth is so gentle, even as she nips at it with her teeth. Lillah knows I am practically indestructible, yet she still treats me with care. She amazes me in every way.

My hands move to her thighs and squeeze her soft skin gently. Her body feels so good against mine; like I'm finally home after being away for years. The movement of her hips becomes more urgent and I can tell she's getting anxious. "Lillah," I speak into the empty air as she kisses down to my collar bone, then over my heart. Her head pops up and she stares down at me, waiting. "I want to taste you, baby. Like when we were at the shop." I grin when I see the blush of her face intensify. She's so beautiful and innocent; it humbles me that she would allow me to touch her this way. Lillah doesn't speak, only nods her head in agreement and I use her legs to start pulling her forward.

She gasps and places her hands on top of mine and I stop to look up at her. Lillah is wearing a look of confusion and I realize she is trying to figure out what I'm doing. "It's ok, baby, I just want to be able to watch your beautiful face while I have my mouth on you." I watch her eyes go wide when she hears my words and for a second I worry that I've gone too far; then her expression changes and I see the intrigue, followed by flickers of desire. Knowing she's willing to try new things with me heightens my desire to teach her and to please her.

I pull Lillah by her hips, up to my chest, pausing to run my hands along her thighs, gently caressing her skin and hoping to ease any anxiety she might have. I keep my eyes on her face, trying to gauge her reactions; she has her bottom lip pulled between her teeth and is nibbling delicately. I scoot her closer, my tongue flicking against my own lips in anticipation of what I know is coming. I can't wait to have my mouth on her again. Each time I bring her a little closer I let out a low moan before I realize what I'm doing. Lillah is so hot and wet against my skin, it's a good thing she's moving in the opposite direction of my dick. I don't think I'd be able to control myself this time.

I maneuver her until she's close enough to my mouth and I inhale deeply, trying to calm myself but it does no good because I am instantly bombarded by her scent. _Oh fuck_. It drives me crazy when I can sense how turned on she is from afar, but having her so close to my mouth now is likely to drive me mad. I turn my head, licking each of Lillah's thighs in turn, moving up a little bit each time until I'm right where I want to be. When I place my mouth on her I flick my eyes up to watch her lips fall open on a gasp and her head drop back; it's the most beautiful site I've ever seen, her hair cascading down her back and her heavy lidded eyes sliding closed. _She is breathtaking._

My tongue flattens against her slit moving from top to bottom before I push it into her, first teasing her clit then lapping at her sweetness. _God I love the taste of her_. I lift my eyes up to watch her face while I move my mouth and tongue against her. Lillah's hips try to stay in rhythm with my mouth but they can't seem to keep their pattern. She is too far gone.

Sliding one hand over the soft skin of her stomach and hip my fingers aim for where my tongue is currently playing. Unable to control myself, I reach my other hand down to my throbbing cock. Tasting her is too much; I need to find my own release when she does. I start pumping my hand against my cock with the same rhythm as my tongue moving over her.

"Em," Lillah moans out, "Embry, honey, please."

Assuming Lillah is trying to tell me she's close, I slip one finger into her as my tongue focuses on her swollen clit. She whimpers softly but then I feel her hands in my hair, tugging my head back from her body. I'm surprised that she is pulling me away when I know she's so ready to cum. I lick her inner thigh, tasting her wetness there before I look up at her, my hand pausing on my throbbing cock. "What is it, baby?"

Lillah's flushed face stares down at me and I can't help but grin cockily when I see the heavy lids of her eyes staring down at me. I love seeing my woman this way, knowing I'm the one making her insane with lust. Just the thought of how I make her feel has my cock twitching in my hand again. _God, I love this woman_.

The hottest words ever come out of her mouth, "I want to touch you. Let me help you, Embry. May I?" I may be crazy at times, and deny both of us many things, but I can't say 'no' to that request. I slowly nod my head and help Lillah reposition herself so she's sitting on my chest, facing the opposite way. I take the opportunity to run my hand up her back, from the base of her spine, up into her hair line. She has the most beautiful back.

"Fuck! Baby!" I gasp when her hand wraps around me right away. I wasn't expecting her sudden movement. She usually has a slow build up before touching me, like she's working up her nerve. But she is becoming more relaxed, more willing to try new things. _This is a good sign._ My heart swells, knowing she's gotten more comfortable with me, which is all I've ever wanted. I place my hands on her hips and I can't help but tighten my fingers against her skin when she strokes her hand down my shaft. A tortured moan escapes my lips and my hips jerk up for more when Lillah doesn't continue right away.

My cock twitches and I hear Lillah giggle. I nearly choke when she pulls one hand back down and uses the other to run her thumb over my head. I shudder under her touch, unable to suppress the gasping moan that escapes. I'm certain she's determined to make me lose my mind with her gentle, slow strokes and teasing. My hands move from their position on her hips to meet over her spine, just above her ass. She has the most beautiful, luscious ass. I lift my head off of the pillow and nip at it without thinking.

Lillah stiffens against me, but then her body shudders and I hear her moan, "Embry!" _She's ok._ That, in truth, is all I really care about.

When Lillah's hands begin moving on me again I take the opportunity to caress her silky skin. My hands move over her hips, around to her stomach and then down to her supple thighs. Her body feels so amazing beneath my hands; I will never get enough of her. I can't help but let my hands stray up inside of her thighs. I can feel the heat before my hands make it between her legs. Her arousal lures me closer, needing to touch her, to feel what I do to her. I slide my fingers against her wet lips and as soon as one of my fingers slips into her, Lillah's hand tightens around my dick.  
_  
_I can't see Lillah's face so I use her body to tell me what she likes and how close she is to cumming. Her hands continue stroking me up and down, pulling my foreskin up over the head of my cock and back down to expose it again. I see her lean forward slightly, her head dropping down until I feel a light breeze move across my dick. When I realize what she's doing and how close her mouth is to me I almost lose it. My hips jerk up and I pull my finger out of her before adding one to it and pushing them both back in. My goal is to make her cum before I do. I _always_ want to take care of her, during these times and all others.

Lillah presses herself down on my hand and I use my finger tips to stroke inside of her while my free hand rests on her hip as a guide. My hips are moving in sync with her hand, trying to teach her without words what I like best. I'm beyond speaking now, her hands on me, knowing she can see every move we both make has driven me out of my mind. Then I hear her speak and I almost lose it all together.

"Embry, just a little bit- more," she moans and I have to close my eyes and focus. In the back of my mind I tell myself to warn her before I'm about to cum, so she can grab something to catch it. Before I can stop myself or think twice about what I'm doing I pull my fingers from her, eliciting a moan of disapproval from her but I keep going, placing my hand on her hip. I pull her hips back, toward my mouth so I can taste her as she cums. She pauses only a little but not for long. As I position her so my mouth can be on her again her hand begins stroking once more. She increases the pressure a little bit every few pumps, alternating by swiping her thumb over the head when it is exposed.

At first Lillah seems surprised by my pulling her to my mouth again but as soon as I lick her pussy her hips are jerking against my face. I grin against her hot flesh and I flick my tongue against her clit before pushing it into her. Lillah's walls tighten around me and my cock jumps again as I imagine what it would feel like to be buried in her like this, her slick heat surrounding me. She is so perfect. I can't believe I ever put my hands on another woman before her. From this moment on, I swear to myself, there will be no one else; even if Lillah can't accept the imprint or love me.

Lillah's hands bring me back from my short mental vacation and I bring my hands to capture her hips. They've started moving at an erratic pace, matching that of her hands on my hard on. She's so close to cumming, I can sense it and I can't deny either of us this moment. I bring one of my hands to join my mouth and press my finger into her while my tongue strokes over her clit. I add a second finger, easily sliding it between her soaking lips before I begin to stroke, seeking what I know will send her over. One of my finger tips touches her g-spot and Lillah's hands automatically release my cock. We both whimper; her in pleasure, me in pain. I take the opportunity to press against it again as my tongue strokes her clit and I pull at it with my lips. She screams my name, the most beautiful sound I could ever hear escaping from between her lips.

I pull my fingers from her quivering body and use my flattened tongue to lick long, slow laps at her as she cums in my mouth. She tastes even more amazing than I remember and I make a mental note to do this more often. My woman deserves above average, top notch treatment. Her body quakes above me, goose bumps covering her flesh. I slowly pull my mouth away from her when I'm sure she's started to come back down. I place a kiss on the inside of each of her thighs and I can't stop the grin that spreads across my face. She doesn't say anything or make any movements for a few long minutes and I take the time to take deep breaths and calm my body down. I almost came when Lillah did. Just feeling and hearing her is enough to send me over the edge. The only thing I didn't like was that I couldn't see her beautiful, expressive face.

I rub one of my hands up and down her thigh before finally speaking, "Baby, do you mind turning around? I'd like to see your face," I ask her awkwardly. I hear her inhale deeply before she begins moving, placing each of her legs on one side of me. I immediately pull her down to rest against my chest and find her lips, kissing them slowly, tenderly.

Moments like these I hope I can show her how I really feel without having to say it out loud just yet; I don't think she's ready for that. As we both pull back I feel a grin spread across her lips and I return it with one of my own. My eyes find Lillah's and I feel a little bit cocky that hers are a deeper shade of grey, her pupils taking up a large part of the iris. Her skin is still flushed, red with arousal, and even though I hadn't been pulling my own hands through it, her hair is a tangled, sexy mess. _That's what you have to look forward to you lucky bastard, if you'd just make love to her._

I shake my head to clear my thoughts and make a move to have her lay against me fully. Her body pulls away and I look at her questioningly as she sits back on her heels. My eyes naturally stray down to her breasts, which are amazing and are calling my name. I chuckle, realizing she was right, I AM a boob man. But only when it comes to Lillah's. I lick my lips and pull my eyes away from her straining nipples to look up at her face. She has the slightest hint of a smirk on her lips but her face has a flush high on her cheekbones. _I can't get enough of her._

Before I can say anything Lillah swings one leg over my thighs then leans forward, kissing down my chest, then stomach, then abs. She lifts her head but her hands pick up where her lips left off, trailing down my skin until she reaches for my still hard erection. My eyes roll back in my head as soon as her hand wraps around me again. I say her name several times before realizing that it's coming out in barely a whisper and being drowned in the pants and growls that are coming from my chest. I try to stop her, to tell her to grab a towel or a shirt or something, anything, but her hand keeps going. Stroke up with a little twist of her wrist, stroke down and she teases my exposed head but just barely, lightly touching. I clutch at whatever I can find, too far gone to care about anything else. I fist the comforter below me with one hand and place my other hand on her thigh, needing to touch her in even a small way.

Her hands increase their pace and I lift my hips to meet them every time, needing to help her move faster. Tension builds in the base of my spine and I feel my balls tighten. Lillah's next words are my undoing, I can't even respond to them for the insane explosions going on in my head. "I want to taste you too. You should teach me that soon, very soon." Her voice doesn't leave any room for argument; it is a statement, not a question.

She strokes down once, twice and I lift my hips, unable to stop it any longer. My eyes pop open and I watch in slight horror as I come all over her hands and chest. I clench my eyes shut and I hear myself calling her name over and over without even realizing I've opened my mouth.

Before I can apologize I watch Lillah lift her hand to her mouth, her lips wrapping around her thumb as she hums softly. My pounding heart starts to slow down when I see her grin, pulling her thumb from her mouth. I watch as she sinks against me, easily curling around my now spent body. I know I need to go clean her up, but I can't move just yet.

"I'm sorry about the mess," I whisper against the top of her head.

She looks up at me, her grey eyes smiling, "Don't be, that was amazing to see."

"Amazing, huh? You are pretty amazing yourself," leaning forward I kiss the tip of her nose.

"Thank you." Lillah's skin darkens again as she whispers against my chest, "I wasn't joking before, Embry. I really do want to taste you."

"I know, Lillah. When you're ready, you can." Needing to distract her, I hold on to her as I slide out of the bed, "But for now, let's clean up before we fall asleep."

She grins but agrees, leaning her head against my chest as I carry her into the bathroom. I may seem calm on the outside but I'm freaking out on the inside. _She wants to taste me? Her hot mouth on my dick? And I'm supposed to stay in control? Not likely! I am so fucked._

-0-

My hands are focused on a van I've been working on all morning, but my mind keeps drifting back to last night. _Girlfriend. _I'm still shocked that Lillah would be interested in calling me her boyfriend, but it's true. We've texted a few time so far this morning and it makes me smile every time I see her start a text out with "Hey Boyfriend".

At least I haven't been busted by any of the guys yet. I'll tell them before we leave to go out tonight, but I want to keep this to myself a little longer. I don't want to explain to them why I didn't tell her everything last night. I should have, but I was so surprised that she even agreed to being my girlfriend it didn't cross my mind to explain further, at least until I was trying not to make love to her. But that wouldn't have been the right time anyway.

I slam the hood down on the van, finally finished working on it. As I'm wiping the grease off my hands I'm hit with her scent. Turning around, I see Lillah walking through the shop toward me, her smile growing when she sees me watching her. When she reaches me, she wraps her arms around my neck, pulling me down to her lips, "Hi Boyfriend. You are looking very sexy today."

I do my best not to touch her with my greasy hands but I grin, mumbling against her lips, "Hi Girlfriend. You always look very sexy."

"Thank you." The blush comes automatically to her skin, but she is still smiling as she speaks, "I like watching you work, digging around in the engine, getting all dirty." Lillah sighs as she runs her fingers through my hair, tugging gently as she speaks against my ear, "I'd love to get in that van with my boyfriend-."

Before Lillah can vocalize what she'd like to do in the van, Paul shouts from across the shop, "Boyfriend?"

Immediately all of the guys, plus Emily, are surrounding us. Lillah releases her hold on me, but she winks at me before she turns around to face everyone. Her hand reaches for mine as she speaks, "Yes, boyfriend."

Jacob is the first to speak, "Geez, Embry, I thought I was going to be the first to know if anything changed in your relationship with Lillah."

"So you agreed to call yourself this idiot's girlfriend?" Paul's laughter causes him to double over.

Before I can respond, Lillah has crossed her arms over her chest and is speaking in her 'teacher' voice, "Yes, I happily agreed to be Embry's girlfriend. He's not an idiot, he's a wonderful man."

My heart swells hearing Lillah defend me to the guys. Three weeks ago I was wishing she would stand up for me like this when everyone was chewing me out at Billy's house. I never would have guessed that it could actually happen; that Lillah would be willing to not only defend me, but stand up to the guys about our relationship. It makes me love her even more. I finally understand what the guys were talking about when they said they fall more in love with their imprints every day.

Ignoring my greasy hands, I wrap my arms around her waist, pulling her against me. I nuzzle against her neck softly, "Thank you."

Before she can say anything, I look up at the group watching us, "Yes, I'm Lillah's boyfriend now."

Emily glances at Lillah then smiles up at me, "That's great, Embry. That's one more thing for us to celebrate when we go out tonight." Emily looks back at Lillah, "Let me know when you're ready to head over to Rachel's house. I'm ready to go whenever."

I can feel Lillah nod then Emily turns to the guys, "Come on guys, let's give them some space. You can pick on Embry later."

I have to hold in my laughter as I watch everyone walk away, following Emily's orders. Sam and Jacob may be the Alphas, but Emily is like a mom to all of us. When she speaks, everyone listens.

Lillah turns around, again pulling me down to her. I'm unable this time to stop myself from wrapping my arms around her, easily lifting her up so she is closer to me. Lillah tightens her grip in my hair to steady herself as she kisses down my jaw line, "You didn't tell them?"

"No, haven't had a chance, we've been so busy I've barely looked up until you got here."

Lillah's mouth finds my chin, grazing her teeth along the edge before she looks up at me, "I've missed you. How much longer until you are done?"

"I've missed you too." As I speak, her lips move over my face, kissing the sides of my lips, my cheeks, the corner of my eyes, the tip of my nose; basically anywhere she can reach, "I have a few more vehicles to work on. Depending on what your girls have planned, Jacob and I might skip patrols. What are you up to today?"

Lillah's lips again find mine, kissing me softly before pulling back just enough to speak, "Emily and I are going over to Rachel's to get ready. If you don't mind, Paul and Rachel are going to ride with us to Port Angeles, in my car."

"Ugh, stuck in a car with Rachel? Do we have to?" I know I'm whining, but I don't want to ride with Rachel, there's no telling what she might say while we are cooped up together.

Lillah laughs, shaking her head, "It'll be fine. Rachel and I want to drink and it's silly for us to drive separately. I'll drop the Acura off at your place, Emily can follow me and take me over to Rachel's. I'll leave the key by your door. That way you can come pick us up and your truck isn't at their house tonight."

"Alright," I sigh, knowing I can't argue with her. Besides, I'm looking forward to going out with her tonight, especially now that she is officially my girlfriend. Now if any of those bastards come near her, I can honestly tell them to keep their fucking hands off my girlfriend.

"Good." Lillah giggles against my lips, "What are you wearing tonight?"

Laughing at her change of subject, "I don't know. What should I wear?"

Her eyes light up, "I get to pick out your clothes?"

"You can," I grin at her, "You are my girlfriend now; when you drop the Acura off you could go in and pick something out for me."

"Really?" Lillah leans back, smiling softly.

Letting her slide down my body I drop my hand into my pocket, grabbing my keys. I remove one of the three keys from the key ring and hand it to her, "Here, feel free to go find something for me. Just leave them on the bed. Clothes are in the closet or in the bottom drawers of the dresser. You can leave the key to the Acura on my dresser."

Lillah stands on her tip toes, kissing me excitedly, "Sounds like a plan. I'll give you the key back later."

"Keep it," I mumble as I shake my head. "Just leave the door unlocked when you leave. Or you could skip going to Rachel's and wait for me in my bed. I wouldn't complain about that."

Lillah gives me a few small pecks on the cheek before stepping out of my arms, "I wouldn't mind that either, but we'd never leave your bed tonight."

"I know," I grin as she steps back, "I don't have a problem with that."

"I think Rachel might kill you if we were to miss her party because we were fooling around," Lillah grins, looking over her shoulder at Paul, "Isn't that right, Paul."

"Damn straight! Rachel would kick your ass, Embry," Paul grins, winking at Lillah, "She knows Embry is a bad influence on you."

I shrug my shoulders while grinning at Paul, "Like I care."

Emily walks in between Paul and I, linking her arm through Lillah's, "Come on, enough time with your Wolf Charming. Hang out here much longer and he's going to turn back into Cranky Pants. See you boys later." Emily looks over her shoulder, smiling at Sam, "Sam, I'll see you at Rachel's in a little bit. I dropped the kids off with Sue before I came over here."

Sam grins wide as Emily and Lillah walk past him, "Works for me. Do we have to go to dinner with all them tonight?"

"Yes." Emily winks as she and Lillah walk out, calling over her shoulder, "But I'll make it up to you later, don't worry."

When the girls leave the guys all turn back to me. Paul starts in immediately, "You still didn't tell her? You are a fucking moron!"

Sam growls, "Paul, that's enough."

Sighing, I tell the guys what happened last night, from finding Carter at the house to Lillah agreeing to be my girlfriend. They still think I'm an idiot for not telling her, but I don't care. All that matters is how Lillah and I feel about each other, and without a doubt I know that I've never felt happier than I do right now.

-0-

**A/N:** Don't forget to wipe off the drool before you return to real life. Next week is the bachelor/bachelorette party. Get ready. You'll need the full week, trust us. Be sure to follow our blog for teasers, polls and other fun things. The link is on our profile.

Also, it's October now - as you may remember, our Embry lost his mom to breast cancer. For more information on breast cancer, and what you can do to help, check out Susan G. Komen for the Cure at (www [dot] komen [dot] org) and don't forget your monthly self-breast exams!

See you next Tuesday!


	28. Chapter 28 Addicted

**Chapter 28 "Addicted"**

**Disclaimer:** First name is not Stephenie. Last name is not Meyer. Go ahead, tell us you are shocked about this news.

**A/N:** If you didn't see the teaser, this is your warning, don't read this chapter at work. Insert eyebrow wiggle here._  
_

_I'm so addicted to  
All the things you do  
When you're going down on me  
In between the sheets  
Or the sound you make  
With every breath you take  
It's not like anything  
When you're loving me  
_"Addicted" - Saving Abel

**EPOV****  
**  
The rest of the afternoon kills me, dragging by so slowly that I think I'll never get to leave. I need to run home to get cleaned up so I can pick up Lillah. As the day moves on I begin to reconsider tonight's plans. _I should have insisted she meet me at my place, Rachel's temper be damned._

I resolve myself to finish the vehicle I'm working on; so I get my ass moving. I vaguely hear the other guys poking fun at me for being so focused so I flip them off. Of course, that sets them off on a wild tangent of laughter. _Whatever. _I've got things to do and a girlfriend to get back to.

The stupid grin is back on my face as that word floats through my mind again, but I don't care. _I'm such a lucky asshole._ I thought I would have to really do some convincing to get her to put a title to what we are but Lillah seemed more than willing, excited even, to call me her boyfriend. She's now taken to calling me "Boyfriend" as a nickname. I don't give a fuck if it makes me sound like a pussy when I admit that I really love hearing it.

As I finish up the last car of the day, the other guys are wrapping up too so we can close early. "Go home and shave Embry, and shower too, you stink." I roll my eyes at Paul but I refuse to let him put me in a bad mood. I'm looking forward to being able to take Lillah out like a real couple.

"It's a wonder you get any action at all, Paul. I bet Rachel has to plug her nose," Sam tells him seriously and I double over with laughter. Sam rarely gets involved in our arguments but when he does, it's worth the wait. Paul doesn't say anything in retaliation, he only snarls and turns to go in the opposite direction of Sam and me.

"He's such a brat," I tell Sam, still laughing, "No wonder he's perfect for Rachel."

Sam doesn't say anything for a second, changing the subject when he does finally speak, "Things are good with Lillah?"

"Yeah, things are- really good, I'm crazy about her," I admit to him. I feel like I can trust Sam not to tell this to the other guys. The rest of them are like gossiping old women, but not Sam.

"I'd be willing to bet she feels the same way," he tells me and looks me straight in the eye. "Don't fuck it up by waiting too long to tell her." Sam doesn't have to tell me what he means because I already know; it's been weighing on my mind, a lot. I know I need to tell her she's my imprintee, but before that, I want to tell her I'm in love with her. Before the conversation can get any heavier, Sam slaps me on the shoulder, "See you at Paul and Rachel's." Sam nods once then turns to lock up as I head home.

-0-

I rush through my shower routine, not shaving after reading Lillah's note to 'stay scruffy'. I haven't been able to wipe the grin off of my face since reading it. I wish I'd thought to slip a note telling her a few things I wouldn't mind seeing, or not seeing, as the case may be. I don't bother with my hair, before pulling on my clothes quickly. Lillah picked out a plain button down black shirt and some dark jeans. She knows me pretty well, my girl, selecting my favorite, most comfortable clothes besides a t-shirt and sweats. I thought it was odd when I noticed my riding boots sitting out but I put them on anyway. _What the lady wants, the lady gets_.

After I finish dressing I go out to Lillah's car, adjusting her seat and mirrors before I can even get in because she's so much shorter than I am. When I sit back, pulling the seat belt on, the action causes her scent to float around me and I can't help but groan. It's going to be a long night, being in this car with her smell, so concentrated, surrounding me. _I'm pretty damn excited._ I guess I'm a glutton for punishment when it comes to her. There's nowhere else I'd rather be, that's for damn sure.

I don't waste time on the drive over to Paul and Rachel's; I've been waiting all day, like a thirteen year old girl going on her first date. I'm not nervous but I'm definitely anxious. I want everything to go perfectly so that Lillah will see that I'm worthy of being her boyfriend, and hopefully even more. That train of thought makes me think of that asshole showing up at Lillah's house. When I feel my hands start to shake against the steering wheel I push those thoughts aside, not wanting to ruin this evening with thoughts of _him_. When I told the guys about it this morning at the shop they all wanted to close up and drive to Seattle to find him. Even though I was tempted, I knew it would only upset Lillah, which is the last thing I want.

Sam is getting out of his car just as I pull up in front of Paul and Rachel's. Paul comes out of the house before Sam and I make it to the front steps. "Dude, don't flip when you see Lillah," he tells me right away. _Fuck. This can't be good._

"What do you mean? Rachel didn't make her look like a hooker, did she?" my voice starts to grow louder before I can control myself.

"No. No, you know Rachel wouldn't do that. Besides, I don't think these are Rach's clothes. I'm just saying, she looks hot dude. Don't be a cranky ass when you see her. She seems pretty excited but a little bit nervous. Her heart rate is all over the place."

My eyebrows shoot up in surprise. Paul isn't usually one for deep thought and concern but I nod my head in acceptance, "Thanks man, I'm sure she looks great."

Paul chuckles and turns to walk toward the house. He glances at me sideways before speaking again, "You're gonna be on your knees praying for relief when you see her."

I don't say anything as Sam and I follow Paul into the house. The first of the girls I see when we walk in is Emily. She's smiling at me happily and she looks beautiful. Sam goes to her immediately, wrapping his arms around her before he begins kissing over the scarred side of her face. He does this whenever they've been apart for more than ten minutes. The guys and I use to tease him about it but I 'get it' now.

I notice movement from my right and I glance over to see Rachel roll her eyes just as Paul smacks her on the ass. "Seriously, Paul?" Rachel says while glaring at him. Paul just shrugs and glances over toward the hallway. I move my gaze in that direction and I am speechless. _Paul was right, I may fall to my knees._

Lillah is wearing jeans that are tight from waist to ankle. There are worn places on the thighs with the addition of some well placed holes. Her top is black with a low neckline, made of some kind of flimsy, sheer material. I can see the outline of her tits beneath the fabric. The longer I stare at them, the more I can see her nipples harden. _Fuck me_. Speaking of fucking; her shoes. _Good God, her shoes._ Black fuck me heels with grommet looking things all over them. I can't believe she's able to stand in them, the heels are so high. I have to admit that Lillah looks amazing. More than amazing, actually. I'm not going to be able to take my eyes off of her all night; the problem is, I won't be the only one, I'm sure.

I finally pull my eyes up to meet Lillah's stare and I notice she's nibbling on her bottom lip. She looks worried and it makes me realize I'm frowning. _Shit_. I don't want her thinking I don't like what she's wearing. I walk forward, crossing the room quickly so I can pull her into my arms. Lillah doesn't hesitate to wrap her arms around me, burying her face against my shirt before I hear her inhaling deeply. I can't help but drop my face down to kiss the top of her head. When she pulls back to look at me, we both grin at one another.

"You look so beautiful, baby," I tell her as I take in the rest of her now that I'm close. Her hair is all wild, like I've been running my fingers through it. It's sexy as hell and I want to push my hands into it, but I stop myself. Lillah's eyes are outlined in smudged black, making her look sexy and intense. I drop my eyes down to her lips and I see that, thank goodness, she hasn't covered them in a lot of gunk; they are just shiny. I take the opportunity to lean down and kiss her, unable to resist her beautiful mouth.

When I pull my mouth away from Lillah's she is grinning and whispers, "Thank you, Boyfriend. You look handsome yourself."

"Hey you two, we need to go. The restaurant won't hold our table forever," Rachel's voice interrupts our moment; when I roll my eyes and snarl, Lillah giggles. I kiss her one more time before taking her hand in mine and turning to face the others. Just as we all exit the house a car pulls up; Jared and Kim climb out of the front seats, Jake and Ness out of the back. The girls chatter excitedly, squealing about outfits and shoes and God knows what else until we separate them into the vehicles.

-0-

Dinner is wild, but with this group, it isn't surprising. At least Rachel picked a steak house well known for its loud music and peanut shells on the floor, so they weren't too surprised by our group; except for the number of people, and, realistically, the size of all of us guys. There were quite a few stares as we walked through the restaurant to our reserved table. However, it wasn't just us guys getting the looks. I saw quite a few men looking at our women, some even daring to look at Lillah. It took everything in me not to attack, but having her by my side as we walked to our table helped to calm me.

I manage to keep some sort of contact with Lillah throughout dinner, even if it's just my thigh against hers while we eat. After we finish our meal the girls all go to the restroom, in a pack. _Still not understanding why they do this, but whatever. _While they are away the waitress comes back, asking if we want dessert. We all grin and put in our orders, knowing the girls are going to kill us for ordering dessert, but not caring.

When Lillah returns to the table she sits down in her chair, but scoots over to rest her head against my chest. I chuckle, kissing the top of her head, "Tired already? We can go home anytime."

"No, just full. That was a huge salad." Resting her chin on my shoulder she smiles, "Rachel says the club is just a few blocks away, we can walk there if we want."

Glancing down at her heels - _fuck I love those heels_ - I frown, "Are you sure you'll be ok walking? Those things look like they hurt."

"I'll be fine, don't worry, Boyfriend." She kisses my cheek, a small grin on her face, "If my feet hurt later you can carry me back to the car, right?"

"I'll carry you anywhere," my grin is wide as I realize how true this statement is. I really would do anything for her.

Lillah shakes her head, "I was kidding, Embry."

Nuzzling her neck softly I whisper, "I wasn't. I'd happily carry you anywhere, my beautiful Lillah."

Just then the dessert is dropped off at the table. Lillah frowns, pointing at the dessert, "What is that?"

"It's for us to share." I might end up eating most of the dessert, but that's ok, as long as she enjoys a few bites. I smile as I wave my hand around the table, "Everyone else has a dessert. Besides, I'll eat whatever you don't, just like always. It's a caramel apple crisp with ice cream." The name of the dessert comes out in a sing-song voice, trying to tempt Lillah.

It works, "Fine," she pretends to huff. "It's your back that is going to suffer tonight when you carry me to the car later."

I don't say anything, just grin and shake my head as I pick up a spoon and dip into the dessert. Caramel drips over the edge of the plate and I hear Lillah gasp something about "caramel abuse". I release the spoon, resting it against the side of the dish so I can take the dripping caramel onto my finger tip.

"May I have that?" Lillah asks, sounding like a little girl.

I look between her and the sugary mess on my finger and consider, cocking my head to the side. Before she can ask again I take the finger and put it in my mouth, licking the caramel off. "Mmm, yum," I tell her and Lillah pouts out her bottom lip. I can't help but grin at the look on her face. _God, I love this woman._ I find some more caramel on the edge of the plate and swipe it up with my finger before turning to Lillah. She opens her mouth and leans closer but I pull my hand back, away from her. I push her hair to the side with my free hand and before Lillah can realize what I'm going to do, I slide the caramel across the side of her neck.

Lillah gasps, her voice low, "Embry!" I can tell when she realizes what I'm intending to do because she whimpers, which makes me even more excited.

"Hey! Enough with the PDA!" Rachel tries to snag our attention but I won't allow that just yet; I'm on a mission.

I place my mouth against Lillah's neck, sucking her sticky skin into my mouth and licking my tongue out to clean her. I feel Lillah's body shudder against mine and I can't help but grin against her neck. We are in our own little world until I hear Jacob's voice. "That is so disgusting. Get a room, Embry." I lift my head to look at Jacob with narrowed eyes.

Ness lightly swats his arm and shakes her head before saying "That wasn't polite dinner talk, Jacob Black." He just grins crookedly and I see Ness melt next to him. I roll my eyes before turning back to Lillah. Sadly, Kim has managed to snag her attention. I pick up a few words here and there and I know they are talking about Kim's pregnancy so I take the opportunity to steal a few bites of our dessert.

"Baby, do you want some of this?" I ask her casually and her head pops around to look at me. She gasps when she realizes I've had some without her. Before she can say anything I spoon some up and offer it to her. I love watching her eat. The movement of her mouth, her tongue licking her lips. _I think I'm developing an oral fixation._ Change that, I _know_ I have a Lillah fixation. Everything she does fascinates me and turns me on. Her eyes close as she chews and I'm mesmerized; almost leaning in to kiss her when I notice a drop of caramel on the corner of her mouth. Before I can reach her, she slides her tongue out and licks it away, slowly opening her eyes to look at me as she does so.

My pants are so tight across my dick that I think it might break if she keeps this up. Lillah had two glasses of wine with her dinner; her actions and the faint color on her cheekbones tells me it's doing a fine job of relaxing her. I'm glad to see this because I want her to have a good time tonight, but I make a promise to myself not to let her drink too much.

While everyone finishes off their desserts, I watch as she interacts with the other imprintees. She leaves her hand resting on my thigh, her touch casual but it still drives me crazy. I try to talk to the other guys but my mind won't focus on anything but Lillah; the smell of her, the feel of her, the sound of her voice. "You're so fucking whipped," Paul leans across the table to half whisper. The other guys laugh and I just shrug. _There is no point in denying it now. _

I start talking to Sam, who is seated at the end of the table. Finally absorbed in a discussion, I don't notice that Lillah's hand has started moving. When I finally feel the light pressure of her hand it's too late to stop her; she's cupping my ever present erection and I jump, rattling the half full glasses on the table. Jared snickers from the other end of the table while Jacob and Paul nearly fall over onto the floor, trying to hide their faces. _Traitors_. I freeze, weighing my options; but before I can come to any conclusion on how to acknowledge this situation, Emily stands. "Come on, you slow pokes. It's not every night I'm kid free."

Everyone at the table begins to stand, the guys throwing tips on the table even though we already tipped our waitress after paying the check. Lillah grabs her purse and stands, waiting for me to join her. I adjust myself, sending a wave of tension up my spine before reluctantly, I stand. Lillah is grinning at me shyly and I know she's going to be up to no good all night. _I can't wait._ To pay her back I allow her to step in front of me and just before she begins to follow the group I pull her body into mine and press my hard on against her ass. I grin with satisfaction when Lillah shivers against me.

After we leave the restaurant the guys and I drop back, letting the girls walk ahead of us. I can't lie, I'm doing it because I want to watch Lillah in those jeans; her ass looks amazing. But I know she's enjoying some girl time too, so I let her have her fun. I notice they've all stopped in front of a large store window and I throw the guys a look, "We're never going to get to the club if they stop at every display."

"Man, Rachel will bitch if she doesn't get a few hours of dancing in. They'd better move it along," Paul grumbles.

Jacob jogs ahead of us, approaching Ness from behind and propping his chin on top of her head. Sam, Paul, Jared and I follow him slowly, listening to them talk as we approach.

"That is gorgeous!" Emily says in awe.

"What about this one? See it, behind the blue one?" Kim points at the glass and leans her face closer so she can see better. I glance up at the store front and see a sign for Fountain Square Jewelers.

I watch Lillah as I step up behind her. Her eyes are glued on something but she doesn't say anything. "What do you see in there?" I ask casually, knowing Lillah probably won't want to point out what she's admiring. She doesn't speak but she does lift her hand and point at something on the front row of the brightly lit case. The ring Lillah is admiring looks like nothing I've ever seen before. It's platinum, with what looks like vines or leaves made of diamond chips. In the center of the ring is a red stone, but it's not a ruby. The little sign below it is labeled "Fire Opal: symbol of the most fervent love in ancient times".

"That's pretty," I say and look at her, waiting on her to confirm that she does like it.

"Yeah, it's nice," she says wistfully before turning around to smile at me. I take Lillah's hand and we start walking again when the rest of the group begins moving forward. She releases my fingers but before I can complain she steps closer to me, wrapping her arm around my waist. I happily do the same to her and we walk like this the rest of the way to the club.

-0-

As soon as we walk in, all of the girls make a beeline for the dance floor. I see Rachel run up to the DJ stand as the guys and I head to the bar. We confiscate two high top tables and pull them together, along with hijacking a few extra chairs in case the girls want to take breaks. I offer to pay for the first round of beer, also ordering water for Lillah.

The girls pop over to drink a few shots and some kind of fruity shit that looks bright pink. I try to push water toward Lillah and Paul does the same to Rachel but they won't have any of that. Emily and Ness stick with soda, Kim with water. Emily snickers at Lillah and Rachel, "I'm glad I'm not missing this."

After the girls return to the dance floor I do my best just to keep an eye on Lillah, make sure no jerks are hitting on her, but I find myself sucked in by her movements. She looks so damn sexy, the way she moves on the floor should be outlawed. Only I should get to see her body move like that.

"Uh, Embry, you're growling," Jared points out, but I can hear he's holding back his laughter.

Grabbing my glass I toss my beer back in just a few gulps before responding, "So what if I'm growling?"

"Why don't you just go out there and rub your dick against her ass. You know that's what you want to do. Hell, that's probably what she wants you to do," Paul grins, "I know Rachel loves it when I do that."

"I don't dance," I grumble. In all the years of being single, I never had to do much to have women fall all over me. I definitely never had to dance. But with Lillah, I want to be out there with her, not only to protect but because I want to feel her moving against me, with me.

Sam clears his throat, "I don't dance either, Embry. Just go out there and pretend like you are making love to her. Or, in your case, doing everything _but_ making love to her."

I squint my eyes at Sam and push back from the table to stand. "Fuck you. Fuck all of you," I grumble and stalk off toward Lillah. As I walk out on the dance floor I notice a couple of guys coming up behind the girls. One heads for Lillah and the other for Ness. _Uh oh._ I look back over my shoulder to catch Jacob's attention. When I jerk my head toward the dance floor he stands half way before I realize he's going to move; I've never seen Jacob look that pissed off.

My head swivels back to the girls to see one more guy has walked up and is dancing behind Rachel. I don't bother to look back to see Paul's reaction. That leaves Sam and Jared to handle the two wild cards while I deal with the jerk trying to cop a feel of my woman. Lillah is oblivious that someone is coming up behind her but when she sees me heading her way she grins happily. "EMBRY!"

I wait until I'm just a couple of steps away from her before speaking, "Hey, baby." My voice is low but it carries to the small group she's dancing in. The other girls grin and wave and the guys that have approached them look up in surprise.

"IT'S MY BOYFRIEND!" Lillah says loudly and I laugh. Normally I would be royally pissed to see a guy approaching my girl but I feel cocky tonight. I take her arm and pull her close to me, glancing over her shoulder, telling the trespasser with my eyes to back off. He holds his hands up and backs away into the crowd. "Hi, Boyfriend," she says in a quieter voice.

"Hi, baby," I say and lean down to kiss her lips. "You going to let me dance with you?"

"Of course I am!" She smiles happily at me. Lillah wraps her arms around my neck and we start moving to the fast beat of the song that's playing. Things are fine at first, I just move my body with hers; but then she turns around, pressing her ass against my dick. I'm left speechless, not that she probably expects me to speak anyway, but she still makes me stutter like a high school boy. My hands move to Lillah's hips, trying to stop their seductive movement but it only encourages her. I drop my head down onto her shoulder, unable to hold it up any longer. I don't know what to do; keep dancing with her or make her stop? Making her stop seems like the dumbest idea ever but I don't want to disrespect her by humping on the dance floor. She lifts her arms up to wrap around the back of my neck. She turns her head to the side slightly and I can hear her singing her heart out. Something about the carefree tone of her voice makes me laugh and the tension eases away from me. I wrap my arms around her waist and pull her back flush against me, squeezing her gently. She arches her back, causing her ass to press into me a little harder. I moan her name and she giggles, driving me a little more crazy.

We dance through the end of the song, her movements becoming more sexy with every lyric, every verse. As the music ends, another melody begins and I know I can't live through another song. "Baby," I lean down to whisper in Lillah's ear, "I'm going to go hang out with the guys. You have fun with the ladies." She releases her hands from behind my neck and turns to face me. I almost expect her to look disappointed but she smiles at me and nods; she stands on her tip toes and kisses me. I take the opportunity to pull her close and deepen the kiss before releasing her; we are both panting when I slowly step away from her.

The guys are sitting around our tables, grinning like a bunch of idiots when I turn to face them. I shake my head at them, preparing myself to be ragged when I finally make my way back over to the table. I take one more glance back at Lillah and the girls, finding her and Ness dancing together. It makes me happy to see that Lillah has become so close to all of the imprintees.

"Nice moves," Paul grins when I sit down in my empty chair. I try to adjust my dick without anyone noticing.

I don't reply at first, instead filling up my glass from the pitcher of beer that is sitting in the center of the table. "Whatever man, I suck, but I'd do anything she wanted me to if it would put that smile on her face," I tell the guys and they all nod in their heads in understanding. We all turn to look back at the dance floor, each of us watching our girls dancing and having fun. Seeing Lillah's smiling face makes me grin uncontrollably.

Emily and Rachel are dancing together while Kim, Lillah and Ness are all dancing, standing in a circle, holding hands. The girls manage to ignore any guy that tries to come up and approach them. I'm impressed with their avoidance skills, to be honest. I thought I would have to make more than a few trips to the dance floor to tell them to back off.

"You're growling again, dude," Jacob breaks into my thoughts.

I look over at him but his eyes are on Ness. "You ready to tell her?" I ask him.

Jacob runs a hand over his face before looking over at me. "Some days are harder than others. She's been acting kind of weird lately. I don't know if she is keeping something from me or if she suspects I'm keeping something from her. As well as I know Ness, it's still hard to guess what she's thinking."

"That's because she's a female. Half vampire or not, that doesn't change," Jared pipes up.

Sam chuckles, nodding his head, "It's true, females are a complicated breed."

"I don't know," I cut in. "Lillah is pretty straight forward most of the time."

Before any of the other guys can say anything Ness comes bouncing over. She picks up the bottle of water in front of Jacob and takes a long pull. "You guys don't want to come dance with us?" She asks, looking at Jacob in particular. Jacob cuts his eyes over to me and I smirk at him.

"Uh, yeah, I'll go," Jacob finally gives in and Ness' face lights up. Sam and Jared both stand at the same time, saying they'll join him too. I stay back at the table to watch our stuff while the guys go out to dance with their ladies. While they are gone I take the time to really think about what to do with Lillah; when I should tell her that she's my imprintee, and more importantly, when I should tell her she owns my heart. _Soon. Very soon._

-0-

"You ready?" Paul grunts at me. Jacob, Jared, and Sam left about an hour ago with Ness, Kim, and Emily, but Paul and I agreed to stay out a little longer with Rachel and Lillah. Mostly because Rachel was pouting that she never gets to go out.

Finishing off the rest of my beer, I throw a few bills on the table, "Yeah, let's get out of here."

Paul and I make our way out to the girls on the dance floor. Rachel whines and grabs Paul by the shirt, pulling him along behind her. He looks back at me and I just shrug, mouthing, "She's your boss," before I turn to find Lillah.

My beautiful woman has a happy smile on her face as she walks off the dance floor, her cheeks red from the dancing and alcohol, her eyes sparkling. Lillah walks toward me and I open my arms to her. "You ready to get out of here?" I ask next to her ear and she nods.

We leave the dance floor; I expect Paul and Rachel to follow behind us shortly. Once we step outside I take a deep breath and hear Lillah do the same. It's so nice to be out of the crowded club and get some fresh air. I pull the keys from my pocket before turning to pick Lillah up. She protests but I whisper against her neck, "I promised earlier I'd carry you. Your feet have to be hurting by now."

"The pain was worth it. You like my 'fuck me heels', don't you?" Lillah snickers as I walk us toward her car.

"I do like 'fuck me heels' on you," I set her back down when we are beside the car, but we don't get in right away.

"Did you have fun?" I ask as I lean against the car, pulling a swaying Lillah toward me as she wraps her arms around my waist.

"I did, babe. Did you?" She leans up on her tip toes and kisses beneath my jaw. "Thank you for dancing with me."

"My pleasure," I tell her and grin. It was definitely my pleasure to have her lush body rub against mine. Too bad we were in a room full of people while she was doing it. "I loved seeing you have fun. It was nice to get to show you off, but I didn't like other men trying to dance with you."

"You don't say? I hadn't noticed that _at all_," Lillah says teasingly.

I place my hand on her cheek, pulling her face to look up at me so I can kiss her. After a few moments I pull back from her sweet lips, maneuvering our bodies so I can open the back door. "Hop in," I tell her with a crooked grin.

She climbs into the backseat ahead of me and I can't help myself, I run my hand over the curve of her ass. She looks over her shoulder at me and I shrug innocently. While she climbs in, I reach over to start the car, turning on the heater for Lillah and Rachel. After Lillah is settled I climb in, closing the door behind me. "I think Rachel and Paul might be a while," I explain.

"Probably. Rachel wanted to stay longer but I'm getting tired. And I'm drunk," she tells me and scoots close to me. Lillah wraps one of her hands around mine and begins playing with my fingers. When I look down at her she grins up at me and I can see through her eyes that she is, indeed, drunk. Lillah lifts her head up to mine, a sign that she wants me to kiss her without her having to say it.

"What are we going to do until they come out?" I ask her, as if I don't know what she's seeking. _What can I say? I love hearing her tell me what she wants._

"I think," she tells me, starring at my neck as if it's the most fascinating thing ever, "we should make out while we wait."

I raise my eyebrows in surprise, not really expecting her to just go for the jugular. Before I can say anything she releases my hand and moves to climb into my lap. Instead of sitting cross ways, like I expected, she turns to straddle me. I let my head drop back against the seat because she manages to place herself right over my dick. _Oh hell._ My hands move automatically to her thighs, squeezing gently before using them to pull her as close as I possibly can.

Her chest is just barely touching mine but she leans in closer, pushing her boobs into me. She drops her face down into my neck and starts kissing, gently at first. I run my hands up to her hips, over her ass and up her back. She begins sucking at my neck, staying in one spot and I chuckle when she bites down harder than she has in the past. "Baby, what are you doing?"

She lifts her head to look at me with a grin on her face, "I'm trying to mark you as mine." When I hear her words I growl and pull her mouth to mine, unable to help myself. _God, I love this woman so much._ I can't tell her until the time is right but I'm looking forward to that moment. Just as I slip my tongue into Lillah's mouth she begins grinding her jean-covered pussy down on my cock. I have to break away from our kiss because I can't take it. When I look up at her she's smirking at me, her hips still moving in circles.

"No need to mark me, sweet Lillah. I'm already yours," I tell her before nipping at her bottom lip. "But if you insist, you can give it a try." I barely get the words out of my mouth before she grins and goes back to my neck. She nips at my skin with her front teeth then pulls it into her mouth. I'm unable to control the movement of my hips as they jerk up into her, making both of us moan.

My hands move to her hair, threading my fingers through it, tugging on accident. She bites down a little harder and my eyes roll back in my head. I loosen my grip in her hair and move my hands back down, then around to her breasts. They've been tempting me all night in that shirt of hers, her cleavage visible with it being low cut. I cup her tits in my hands, squeezing gently, as she bucks her hips. Her nipples go hard against the palms of my hands and I grin at her reaction. I can't get over her need for me, every time feels like the first and it makes my heart swell.

I need to see her, to put my lips on her full breasts and pull her nipple into my mouth. I move my hands to the bottom of her shirt but just as I start to push it up someone bangs on the car window. Lillah jumps and grumbles against my neck, her hips still moving against mine. Her breath is coming out in pants, as is my own, when I roll down the window.

"Dude, the windows are all fogged up," Paul squints in at us.

"What have you two been up to?" Rachel giggles and leans into the window.

I shake my head and roll the window up, forcing Rachel to stand back from the door. Lillah looks at me and pouts her bottom lip out. She's so cute I can't help but kiss her. "Come on, baby. Fun time is over," I tell her as she slides off of my lap. I slide out of the back seat, sweeping my hand out wide, motioning for Rachel to climb in. After closing the door behind her I inhale deeply, trying to ignore Paul's chuckle as we climb in the car. I get behind the wheel and Paul sits in the passenger seat, placing the giggling girls in the back because they are shorter than we are and neither one of them is in a condition to drive.

"Everybody in?" I ask before putting the car into drive.

"Yep!" Lillah and Rachel giggle together. I turn to look at Paul then whisper to him, "It's going to be an interesting drive home."

"Lillah," Rachel whispers loudly as I pull out of the parking lot. She's not even giving us time to get on the road. "Have you sucked Embry's dick yet?"

I nearly swerve off of the road when I hear Rachel's question. Of course, Paul starts laughing hysterically.

"No! He won't let me," Lillah tells Rachel with what sounds like a shocked tone. She too, is whispering loudly. Even if Paul and I didn't have excellent hearing, we would still be able to hear them clearly.

"What do you mean he won't let you? Have you asked him?" Rachel whispers back.

"Not exactly," Lillah says hesitantly

"You should ask him. I could give you some tips. I bet he'd love it." Rachel continues, "You've never tried it before have you?"

"Mmm not successfully. You know, Carter always passed out."

"Right. He's a dumbass. Paul loves for me to suck his cock. Don't you baby?" Rachel says in her normal voice. She's no longer bothering with the fake whisper.

"I do, Rach. You have a beautiful mouth," Paul confirms, still laughing.

"I'd like to try it," Lillah blurts out, sounding as if she's giving it some serious thought.

"I'm sure Embry would love for you to suck him. Right?" Rachel leans forward, peeking over the seat at me and I can't even answer her. If I open my mouth to speak I'm afraid all I'll be able to do is grunt.

"So what kind of tips? Because, um- there's a lot of him," Lillah is back to her mock-whisper.

Paul snorts, whispering, "About time you let her see your dick. You going to let her give you head?"

I shake my head, unable to say anything. The idea of Lillah's mouth on my dick is too much to think about while driving.

"There is a lot, but you don't have to take all of it, use your hands some," I'm ready to slam the brakes at Rachel's words. Thank God for red lights in town as an excuse for tapping the brakes a little too hard.

Lillah purrs, "I like using my hands."

"Don't forget his balls either," Rachel says matter-of-factly. "Paul loves it when I play with his balls."

I gun the engine when the light turns green, hoping to get out of Port Angeles faster. Paul is holding back his laughter now as I'm grinding my teeth.

"His balls?" Lillah's voice is down closer to an actual whisper now.

"Yep. I like to use one hand on his shaft, swirl my tongue around his head then go down on him as far as I can while teasing his balls. Sometimes I use my teeth on the way back up. Embry," Rachel again leans forward, "how do you feel about teeth? You ok with those or is your dick too sensitive for teeth."

I don't say anything but Paul answers for me, "He's cool with teeth."

"Babe, how do you know _that_?" Rachel gasps.

Paul chuckles, "Embry thinks about Lillah a lot when he patrols."

Lillah interrupts the two of them, whispering again to Rachel, "What do you do about him- um- you know-."

Rachel leans back against the seat again, laughing loudly, "You mean when he cums? Oh shit, that's the best part. I'd say swallow it if you can, as long as you don't have a gag reflex."

"I don't think I have a gag reflex," Lillah whispers. Next thing I know she's giggling like a school girl. _Oh shit, how much worse can this get?_ Lillah whispers again, "I've tasted him already, you know, his um- cum. It's not bad, tastes like him."

"You can do it then. But if not, don't worry, I'm sure Embry will enjoy it either way. You should try it tonight." I'm pretty sure Rachel has been sent to destroy me.

I can see Lillah nod in the rear view mirror, leaning over to whisper to Rachel, "I think I will. I hope I can convince him. He's a little stubborn you know."

"I know. Try talking dirty, it drives them crazy. I bet that would help you out in getting Embry to loosen up, Lillah. Check this out," Rachel moves to lean towards Paul. "Hey Paul, I'm so fucking horny right now, I don't think we'll make it past the front door. I want to take you in my mouth until you cum."

Paul growls from the passenger seat, "Fuck woman, stop that. We haven't even gotten out of Port Angeles and I'm hard as a fucking rock from watching you dance."

"WHOA. Too much information," I scream. "Lillah, you are not allowed to hang out with Rachel anymore."

Lillah doesn't acknowledge my decree. Instead, she blurts out that she's hot. "I'm sorry, baby. The heat isn't on. It's too cold out to turn the A/C on. The alcohol is just getting to you," I tell her.

"Well I'm taking my shirt off," Lillah says and before I can say anything to stop her, her shirt hits me in the back of the head. I adjust my mirror and look back at her. She's wearing some sort of sheer thing that is the same fabric as her shirt. I thought she wasn't wearing anything under the low cut top but I was wrong. Both of them were just too see through to do much coverage. I can see her fucking bra through the shell of a shirt and it's lacy and black and - _fuck_. I look over at Paul, shooting him a "You better not fucking turn around" look.

"Lillah, you should have worn that to the club. You would have made Embry cum in his pants." Rachel announces and Paul is laughing again._ I really hate him._

"Did I ever tell you that Embry stole my bra?" Lillah asks suddenly. I don't know where her mind is going to go next.

"No! Was it just your bra or your panties too?" Rachel asks, bouncing up and down in her seat.

"Just my bra. He hasn't stolen my panties," Lillah's tone sounds like she's disappointed in me.

"Maybe you should take the ones you are wearing off and give them to him."

"RACHEL," I growl, gripping the steering wheel tighter when I hear her suggestion.

"I could do that."

"How about you don't do that. We are in the car with Paul, if you haven't forgotten, Lillah."

"Are you sure you don't want them, Embry?"

"Lillah, leave your fucking panties on," I tell her in an authoritative voice.

At the same time, Paul speaks up, "I think he'd rather be _in_ them, Lillah."

She leans in and whispers into my ear, "But Embry, I'm turned on. It's a little uncomfortable."

I can't say anything out loud. I start chanting "fuck" over and over in my head. We haven't even gotten past the city limits of Port Angeles and we will have to drop Paul and Rachel off before we can go home ourselves. I'm almost afraid of what will happen once we get back to the house. If Lillah is still feeling as bold as she seems to be now, I don't know how I'll be able to control myself.

I hear Rachel snickering from the backseat and I can't imagine what else she has up her sleeve. So far she's tried to push every single button she can, keeping Lillah going. I hear Lillah sigh and I glance back when I have to slow down. She looks at me expectantly and I wink at her. A bright smile moves across her face, spreading from her mouth up to her sparkling eyes.

"I gotta pee!" Rachel announces, thankfully before we've hit the last gas station in town. I know that if I don't stop Rachel won't shut up until we make it to the next one, which is in Forks. I flip the blinker on and turn into the well lit parking lot and let the car roll to a stop. "Thanks!" Rachel says before jumping out and running inside. Paul hurriedly unlocks his door and runs off after her.

"You don't need to go?" I turn to ask Lillah. The questions is barely out of mouth before Lillah's lips are on mine. I cup her face in my hands and add more pressure to the kiss than I normally would. I need her to know that I want her, even if I can't say it with Paul and Rachel in the car. I gently bite down on Lillah's bottom lip and she moans into my mouth. She scoots closer to me, through the opening between the driver and passenger seat, pressing her breasts to as much of my upper body as she can. I can feel her nipples straining against the thin fabric of her top.

"I can't wait to get home," she breaths against my lips.

"Lillah, I don't want you feeling obligated about what you and Rachel were talking about."

"I don't feel 'obligated' Embry. I _want_ to try these things with you," she tells me while pulling back so she can look me in the eye. "I may be tipsy but I know what I'm saying and what I want," Lillah assures me. "I am horny," she admits with a blush on her cheeks. "Ever since you danced with me I've been turned on. You felt so good moving behind me."

I can't help myself now, hearing her say these things in the empty car. "How wet are you, sweet Lillah?"

Before Lillah can say anything in reply the back door jerks open and Rachel jumps back in, "Whew. Beer makes me pee like crazy. Here Lolli Pop, I got us each a bottle of water," Rachel announces while handing Lillah a huge bottle.

Paul pulls the passenger door open and climbs in, shaking his head at Rachel. "Here are your shoes, Rach. You shouldn't take off across a parking lot without something on your feet," he instructs while handing a pair of ridiculous red heels into the back seat. I watch Rachel stick her tongue out at Paul before she takes a gulp from her water bottle. _Wonder how many miles we'll manage to drive before she needs another bathroom break?_

"Everyone ready to go?" I ask before Rachel can jump back out of the car for some other reason.

"Yep, let's roll, homie."

"Rachel." I can't help but laugh at her antics. I glance at Lillah to make sure she's good to go but she has her BlackBerry in her hand, typing away. I frown, wondering who she could possibly be sending messages to. She glances up and smiles at me and nods slightly to let me know she's ready to hit the road again. I nod and turn back around, put the car into gear and get us onto the highway once again.

A few seconds after we are on the road my phone buzzes and I pick it up to find a text from Lillah. I guess that explains what she was up to. As soon as I read her message my dick jumps.

_I'm so wet. My panties are soaked. Do you want to feel?_ ~L

I can't bring myself to look back at Lillah because I know it'll be obvious that she's sent me something. I'll never hear the end of it from Paul, or Rachel. I type out a reply and hit send before I lose my nerve.

_I love to touch you. You are so hot and tight. You are perfect but I'd rather taste you._ ~E

I hear Lillah's phone chime a few seconds later and she chokes out a laugh, making me grin. I love that she doesn't have a problem with it when I say things like this to her. Lillah knows I'm not being disrespectful and often times, she surprises me by her reactions. I want her to know how desirable she is, especially after how things went with her... ex-boyfriend. But now she's mine and I am making it my mission to make her feel wanted; for her to know that I need her more than air.

The rest of the drive home is a random hodge-podge of Rachel's outbursts and her and Lillah giggling like teenagers. I can only imagine what the two of them would have been like if they had met as teens. I know, personally, if I'd met Lillah then I wouldn't have been able to resist her the way I'm able to now. I let me mind wander the entire time, only talking when someone talks to me. My thoughts move from Lillah as a teenager to her upcoming birthday and what I can possibly get her.

When we finally drop Rachel and Paul off, they both make sexual comments to Lillah and I as they climb from the car. Lillah jumps into the passenger seat and turns her body to face me, leaning her back against the door. "Your place or mine?"

"I'm taking you home, Lillah. You are way too drunk, you need to sleep this off," I grumble as I pull back onto the main road.

She swings her legs up, dropping her fuck me heel clad feet in my lap. I can feel the light pressure of the end of her heels in my thigh as she whispers, "But isn't your place closer?"

"Why don't you close your eyes? We'll be at your house soon," I whisper, as I lift her feet. Those heels digging into my thigh is one of the hottest things I've ever experienced and it takes all of my will power not to stop the car right here and take her. I'm hoping the drive to her house will calm me down some. _And maybe she'll pass out._

_But don't you want her mouth on you?_

_Fuck yeah, but I don't know if I can handle it. I'm too on edge, I might lose control._

_Like that's a bad thing?_

Ignoring the voices in my head, I look over at Lillah. She still has her eyes open, watching me, "Baby, close your eyes, get some sleep."

"I can't," she whispers. When I raise an eyebrow at her in question she grins, "When I close my eyes, I just think about getting you naked. I think of all the things I want to do with you, which makes me even wetter. I'm pretty sure my pants are soaked now Embry. Want to feel?"

Lillah grabs my hand and against my better judgment, I let her pull it to her thighs. Like a fucking idiot, I move my fingers higher and I can easily feel the heat coming from Lillah. Her pants are wet, which makes my dick throb. I press one finger in the area I'm hoping is her jean-covered clit, and I'm rewarded with Lillah's entire body shuddering as she moans my name, "Embry, please, hurry."

Pulling my hand back I return it to the steering wheel. My foot slams down on the accelerator, pushing the Acura to go well past the posted speed limit. Lillah giggles, "Don't get a speeding ticket, Embry."

"Don't worry, I know the Sheriff of Forks. He won't give me a ticket. Just hold on tight, we'll be there soon."

-0-

As soon as the garage door closes behind us, I'm out of the car and around to the other side, easily scooping Lillah up in my arms. I pause in the kitchen to grab water and crackers before making a beeline for her bedroom. Setting her down on the bed, I move to the bathroom, opening cabinets until I find her medicine. Grabbing the bottle of aspirin I return to the bedroom, handing her pills and the water, "Drink, you are going to have a monster hang over tomorrow."

Lillah easily swallows the pills, handing the glass back to me as she stands, "Thank you, Embry. You take such good care of me. You are the best boyfriend ever."

"I don't know about that, but I do have a sexy girlfriend," I set the glass down on the table before pulling Lillah closer to me. My lips seek hers out, needing to taste her after all her teasing in the car.

Lillah releases my lips and begins unbuttoning my shirt slowly, kissing my skin as she reveals it. She uses her free hand to dance her fingertips over my skin, tracing the muscles of my abs. My stomach tightens beneath her touch and I'm man enough to admit that my skin quivers too. Once all of the buttons are free she pushes the shirt open and I move my shoulders so that it falls down my arms. Lillah pushes my shirt down my arms until it drops to the floor. I pull her toward me, kissing her lips softly and slowly. My hands find their way to her back, sliding beneath the edge of her shirt and pulling it up, over her breasts until Lillah has to lift her arms. When I pull it over Lillah's head her hair falls all around her shoulders. _She looks so beautiful. _I release the thin slip of fabric and it drifts to the floor, landing atop my shirt.

There is no way I can keep my hands off of Lillah now. I allow my hands to drift down, tracing the straps of her bra, over her shoulders and down until I cup her tenderly. My thumbs find Lillah's nipples through the lace of her bra. I grin when I see them react immediately, hardening beneath my stare. Lillah reaches behind her back and I watch the fabric of her bra tighten then loosen as she unclasps it on her own. I move my hands away long enough to push the fabric off of her shoulders and down her arms, letting it join our other clothing on the floor.

"Do you know how beautiful you are?" I whisper to Lillah. She grins and her face tilts down but not before I see the faint blush on her cheeks. I smile and pull her toward me, our chests meeting, pressing against one another with every deep breath we take. Lillah's nipples press into me, rubbing against my skin every time she moves slightly. Before I realize what she's doing, Lillah turns us around and begins walking me backward until the mattress is right behind me. We sit down on the edge before scooting back to rest among the pillows. She crawls over to me, positioning herself until she's laying half of her body on top of mine. Our mouths meet in the middle of the space between us while my hands move up her naked back, caressing her silky skin.

Lillah pulls her mouth away from mine and moves to my neck, kissing below my chin, down my throat to my collar bone. I don't try to stop her when she begins moving down my chest, my abs and to my belly button. I allow my hands to fall into her hair, threading through the thick strands, preparing to stop her when she nips at the skin of my hip. Her hands move down my stomach to the waist band of my jeans and she pops the button open before I know what she has planned. The zipper comes down right after and I have to fight back a moan. When I feel her hands on my hips and she starts to tug, I lift my hips so she is able to pull my pants down with ease.

_I can't believe I'm doing this. I can't believe I'm letting _her_ do this._ But tonight feels right to take another step with Lillah and I'm only willing to let it happen when she's ready for it. I feel a little guilty that she has had so much to drink but it's obvious that she's managed to sober a little since leaving the club and driving home. I wouldn't let her attempt this otherwise.

Next she pulls my boxers off, not taking her time like I would have expected. I can't stop the groan that rumbles through my chest when my dick springs free and I certainly don't miss Lillah's little giggle when she sees it. I try to pull her toward me so I can kiss her but she won't budge. I look down at my erection and silently pray I'm able to hang on.

Lillah pushes back until she's sitting with her legs tucked beneath her. She settles herself next to my hip before speaking, "I love knowing I effect you this way. Being able to see your body react is amazing to me." I can't really say anything more than a few grunts. Lillah has never really talked to me this way. I'd be lying if I said I didn't like it. I watch as her hands move to touch me, wrapping her fingers around my shaft. My eyes roll back in my head and I have to battle with myself to keep from lifting my hips up to make her hand stroke down me. Lillah doesn't hesitate like she normal does, but starts moving her hand, bringing my foreskin up to cover the head of my erection. She still looks fascinated by it as the head makes a reappearance.

While one hand strokes down Lillah brings the other one over to join it. Her thumb softly touches the head of my cock and I have to grit my teeth; it hurts so good. I open my eyes and notice a bead of pre-cum surface. _Hang on buddy, don't give in too early._ I see Lillah's head drop down and I'm not even close to being prepared for what she does next. Lillah licks her lips and then I watch as, in slow motion, she leans closer and lightly runs the tip of her tongue over the slit of the head of my dick. _Sweet Mary, mother of God_. Lillah makes a little "Mmmm" sound as she sits back up.

"Tell me what I should be doing, Embry. I want to taste you the way you've done me." I swear, when I hear her words I nearly cum. My balls tighten and I hear myself whimper as images of her taking me into her mouth float through my mind. Lillah's hot mouth, sucking and licking my cock, the images cause havoc on my brain; and my dick.

"Lills, you don't have to do that, baby," I assure her. I know she said she didn't feel obligated or pressured after the conversation in the car, but I want to make sure she still feels that way.

"I know I don't have to. I _want_ to, Embry. I want to taste you. I want to pleasure you the way you have me," Lillah assures me. As she speaks she sits up a little straighter and looks me straight in the eye. I search her eyes, looking for any hesitation. When I don't find anything but desire in her grey eyes I take a deep breath, preparing to give her an answer. Just as she moves her hand down my shaft I open my mouth to speak. The only sound I can make is a squeak. Lillah grins when she hears the sound come from my mouth.

"Ok," I finally manage, my voice a little shaky. "Ok, we can try this out, but if you feel uncomfortable even just a little, I want you to tell me, Lillah."

"Yes, I promise. I'll be completely upfront with you," Lillah assures me with a smile on her face and a fast bob of her head. Her eyes are dancing happily as she leans closer to me. I place my hands on her arms and pull her down until I can kiss her lips. I use this opportunity to smooth over any frayed nerves she may have, as well as to calm myself. I need a few minutes to gain control of my bodies raging hormones. _Yes, I am a thirteen year old boy._

"Ok," I repeat as Lillah pulls back from my lips. I don't really know what else to say. I've never had to actually instruct someone on sucking my dick. I sigh and push those thoughts out of my mind. I don't want to think about anyone else that's ever touched me while I'm with Lillah. I'm ashamed that I went through so many women over the years, even though they were more than willing, it makes me feel unworthy of my innocent Lillah.

She moves to sit up, positioning herself next to my hips once more. Her hands reach out to stroke me again, my cock twitching in her hand when she wraps her fingers around me as much as she can. It drives me crazy, seeing her tiny hand wrapped around me. Lillah strokes up slowly, gently before moving her hand down again, exposing the head of my erection. My eyes dart back and forth from her face to her hand, looking for any kind of hesitation that might make me feel like I need to stop her. I never see any; only quiet concentration as she watches what she's doing to my body.

I watch in fascination as Lillah leans down, pressing her lips against my foreskin as it envelopes the head. She flicks the tip of her tongue out of her mouth and barely touches my skin before moving a little further down, kissing all the way down my shaft. The way Lillah jumps right in with no hesitation surprises me only a little. I'm glad to know she feels comfortable enough with me to try something she's never done before. She runs the flat of her tongue from bottom to top. I clench my eyes tightly shut and reach out to grab something to keep me grounded. My hands find the comforter beneath me and I twist it in my grip.

Lillah shifts on the bed and I feel her lips move against the tip of my erection. I open my eyes, feeling tortured but not wanting to miss watching her mouth on me. Before I can realize what her intentions are Lillah nips at the skin covering the head of my cock and I have to battle to keep my eyes from falling shut. I'm amazed at my self control when I manage to keep my hips from lifting off of the bed. Lillah slides her hand down my shaft, pulling the foreskin until my head is exposed and she can repeat the process. She kisses the tip and I shudder at the intense feeling. Before I can even catch my breath from that touch she uses her front teeth to lightly touch the sensitive ridge between my head and foreskin.

"Fuck, Lillah. Fuck. Give me, just a second," I pant out. Lillah's head pops up in alarm and I reach out to her, placing a hand on the side of her face before moving it into her hair. "It's ok, I just need a second. You didn't do anything wrong," I assure her when I notice she is nibbling on her bottom lip nervously. "It's just, hell, you have no idea how much I want you right now. I just need a second to get myself under control."

Lillah nods her head in understanding and I pull her toward me so I can kiss her lips. "You are so beautiful, Lillah Hunter. I'm crazy about you. You know that, right?" I need to know that she understands how much I care for her, even if I can't tell her how in love with her I am. I have to bite my tongue to keep my thoughts to myself. It's getting harder and harder not to blurt everything out.

"I'm crazy about you too, Embry. No one has ever made me feel this way," she assures me before kissing along my jaw and to my ear, nipping at the lobe when she reaches it.

I take deep breaths, working on getting myself under control before I tell her I'm good to continue. It takes a few minutes for me to calm down and Lillah takes her time, kissing along my neck, chest and stomach. "Alright, I think I'm ok now - just, baby, my foreskin it's," I stop speaking and clear my throat, "sensitive."

She whispers an 'ok' before scooting back down the bed again. She places one hand on my hip before reaching the other out to touch me again. Lillah takes a deep breath before leaning down to kiss my abs, moving her mouth down my stomach until she reaches my erection again. I feel her use her tongue to gently lick up my shaft.

Every touch of her hands and mouth is gentle, light- loving and reverent; not only does it affect my body but my heart as well. I watch as Lillah places her lips against the tip of my cock. I know she's preparing herself to take me into her mouth and I inhale deeply, preparing my own self to handle what she's about to do. Her tongue darts out of her mouth, circling my head in a feather light touch. I lift my hips from the bed only by an inch or so before lowering them back down. I don't want to push myself into Lillah's mouth without her permission but I almost feel like begging, I'm so desperate to feel her hot mouth around me.

Lillah strokes me several times before placing her lips around the head of my erection, leaving me exposed to her tongue as she flicks it against me. I moan when I feel her hot, wet mouth around me, her tongue circling me gently. When her hand strokes up, allowing my foreskin to come up and fully surround my hard on she sucks lightly, surprising me that that she would be this bold so quickly. My hands pull the comforter up, away from the bed as I watch her mouth. Lillah's beautiful hair cascades down over her other shoulder, like a back drop to the beautiful show of her lips around me. It is both torture and a dream come true, to have her touching me this way.

Her mouth slides down a little more, her hand still moving as her lips stay wrapped around me. When Lillah has taken half of me into her mouth I have to close my eyes and inhale deeply several times, otherwise I might not make it much longer. I release the comforter and bring my hands up to Lillah's head, twining my fingers through the hair at the nape of her neck. I can't allow myself to keep my eyes closed tight and not watch the perfection that is Lillah's mouth on me. I realize when she's about half way down my dick that I wasn't of sound mind to tell her not to force herself to take all of me in. I'm not sure of her gag reflex and since she's never actually done this before, I don't know what her reaction will be. Also, the last thing I want is for her to feel obligated to deep throat me, although _I_ sure as hell would enjoy it.

"Lills, if you can't... all of me- if you can't do it, it's ok," I manage to rasp out in a gruff voice.

Lillah doesn't say anything, obviously, since her mouth is a little full of my cock but she releases her hand from around me and moves it to my stomach. Her fingertips tickle along my skin and I almost think she is trying to reassure me, when it should be the opposite. Slowly she continues to lower her mouth on me and I can't stop myself when I lift my hips up, pushing between her lips. As badly as I want to push her head further down, I keep my grip on her hair loose and gentle, letting her take her time and control everything.

This is probably the most excruciating experience of my life. The combination of pleasure and the painful throbbing of my dick is almost too much. Lillah pulls me into her mouth as far as I'm guessing she can manage and her tongue massages up the underside of my cock before she sucks gently. She uses her lips to protect me from her teeth, bless her and begins to pull her head back, increasing the suction of her hot mouth. Before she reaches my tip she moves her mouth back down, following her hand as she pushes my foreskin down. I don't realize her intentions because I'm too busy panting and carrying on like I've never been sucked off before; but her bottom teeth lightly graze my skin.

"Fu-," I try to say but am unable to because she goes down further and my hips lift up, allowing my dick to hit the back of her throat. Lillah pauses and I'm almost frantic, thinking I've pushed her too far but then she whimpers around me, the vibration nearly sending me over the edge. As much as I want her to keep going I don't know how long I can hold off. I need to cum right now. It feels like an eternity since we made it to the bed and she started touching me but it honestly hasn't been that long. I'm in a never ending battle with myself now; _try and fight off my own orgasm or just fucking give up and warn her that I'm about to cum? _

In hindsight, I realize, I should have asked her if she planned to swallow or if I need to take aim somewhere else. The idea of her swallowing my cum, her throat working against the head of my dick is almost too much for me to consider. I'm a sick man for hoping above anything else that she'll want to taste me as I let myself go in her mouth. "Baby, I can't wait much longer," I groan out as she pumps me out of her mouth, this time allowing me to fall from her mouth completely. Lillah lifts her head to look at me from beneath her heavy lidded eyes. She looks half confused and half turned on.

When she takes a deep breath and releases it, her mouth so close to my erection, sends a breeze over my wet cock. I have to drop my hands from her hair, one of them falling to the bed and the other falling to grip my dick. "You don't want me to-" Lillah asks as her eyes bounce back and forth between my hand and my face. I look into her eyes and realize that she's mistakenly thinking I don't want her to finish sucking me off. _That is the furthest thing from the truth._

"No, it's not that. I just didn't know if you'd want to swallow?" My explanation comes out as a question without my meaning it to.

"I can't wait to taste you; Embry, I want to do this." Taking a deep breath she continues, "I want to feel you hit the back of my throat as you cum in my mouth," she says boldly, honestly; surprising me. Without me realizing it my hand has started stroking up and down, squeezing gently and running my thumb over my head each time it's revealed. Lillah hears the sound it makes and pulls her gaze away from mine, looking down to watch. She licks and I can't help but watch the expressions dance across her face. Interest, intrigue, arousal; all flicking across her beautiful eyes as she watches me pump my hand up and down. "Embry," she says my name abruptly and looks up at me, her eyes dark with desire, "do you do this to yourself when you go home?"

My eyes grow wide; I swear they nearly pop out of my head when I hear her words. I know I can't lie to her, "Y-yes, at times."

"Do you think of me when you do it?" she asks, surprising me again. She really is more bold when she has alcohol coursing through her system.

"Fuck, Lillah," I moan her name and she grins before placing her hand on top of mine, moving it up and down. "I have, yes. But it's nothing compared to the real thing," I assure her between gasping breaths. She seems pleased by my answer and pulls our hands away from my twitching cock.

"Good," she nods in approval. "I want you to cum in my mouth, Embry. I won't take no for an answer," she tells me as I watch in fascination as she lifts one of her legs to straddle mine. Before I can say anything her mouth is back on me, moving up and down, her tongue pressing against the vein on the underside of my hard on. She glides her hand down as her mouth moves up, sucking lightly. She manages to keep my head exposed during the next few passes and when her head bobs down one last time, she sucks harder and takes me in deeper than she has any other time.

My hips buck up to meet her, pressing my head against the back of her throat. I don't know how she knew what to do next but her free hand takes my balls into her palm and really, that's about all I can take now. My hands fist and pound down on the bed, my hips pumping up into her mouth. My stomach tightens and I warn her one last time before I cum down her throat. "Lillah, now, damn it- ungh."

I feel the pull of her mouth and the action of her throat as she begins swallowing. I don't think I've ever cum this hard in my life. It seems never ending as I feel my cum shoot down her throat. My eyes stay glued on her face, watching to make sure she's ok. Her gaze never leaves mine, even as my hips fall to the bed and she gently runs her tongue up my now softening penis. Before she allows me to fall from her mouth she uses her hand to keep my ultra sensitive head exposed and kisses it softly. Gently she allows my foreskin to cover me again and rests my dick against my stomach. I fight to pull oxygen into my lungs and it is only harder to do when Lillah lifts her head to look at me; she is wearing a soft smile on her beautiful face.

_Fucking hell, I love this woman_._ I need to tell her so._ _But until then..._

Pulling Lillah toward me, I settle her against my chest, panting, "As soon as I catch my breath, I'm going to repay you."

-0-

**A/N:** Our little Lillah is growing up! Don't forget to leave thoughts, good, bad, or indifferent. ALSO, it's coming, the sex and him telling her about the imprint. Be patient. We already know what chapter it'll happen in. It's so close we can taste it *ahem*.

Embry asked us to remind you: Don't forget to check your tatas with a yearly mammogram! He encourages you to donate to Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Research this month, as well.


	29. Chapter 29 I Wanna Be

**Chapter 29 "I Wanna Be"**

**Disclaimer:** Not Stephenie Meyer, but some of our ideas do come to us in dreams.  
**  
A/N:** For those still with us, thank you! We love this story and write it because these characters mean so much to us. We are so happy that others have come to love it too. We appreciate every single one of you for taking this journey with us and these characters. We are on the downhill side of this story and things are happening fast. Hope you enjoy the ride!

_When you look at me I start to blush  
and all that I can say is you and us  
oh baby I'm so afraid to be in love  
with you, with you..._

_I wanna be in love with only you  
I wanna watch the sky turn grey then blue  
I wanna know the kiss thats always new  
I wanna be in love with only you  
just you_  
"Blush" - Plumb

**LPOV**

Someone is banging and clanging around in my head, making my forehead throb and my eyes feel like they are going to push out of the sockets from the pressure. It's the most miserable feeling I've ever had. My mouth feels like it's full of cotton and it tastes fowl. As I come to I feel Embry's body against mine; we are still in the same position we fell asleep in and my back is stiff. I want to stretch but I'm scared if I move my head might explode.

"Crap," I barely whisper, because that's the only sound I can manage to force from my lips.

I feel Embry's body move against mine and he starts to run his hand up and down my side, from hip to nearly beneath my arm pit. "Lills, don't move. I'm going to go get you some more water and aspirin, ok?" He's whispering so quietly that I almost don't catch all of his words. He kisses my cheek when I try to nod my head but it's too heavy to move so I just groan. Gently, he pulls away from me and climbs from the bed, careful not to jar me too much. _Best boyfriend ever_, I tell myself.

"Fucking Rachel," I hear him mutter as he walks out of the bedroom door. "Come on Lillah, just one more shot," he says mocking Rachel in a high pitched voice. If I weren't so hungover, it would be funny.

A few minutes later Embry comes tip toeing back into the room. Well, as much as a six-foot-something muscle man slash wolf can tip toe. I've managed to open my eyes into slits when I realize he's been walking around naked. _I sure hope Angela is at Ben's._ I start to giggle and immediately regret it. Embry kneels down next to me, placing two pills against my lips. I open my mouth and take them just as he gently lifts my head with his hand, offering me more water. I drink as much as I possibly can before my stomach starts rolling and I have to push it away. Embry moves the glass out of the way and rests my head back against my pillow, which he's adjusted without me even realizing.

_How can I not love this man? After putting up with my antics last night and now taking care of me this morning, he is amazing._ I remember dinner, and walking to the club, but after that the night starts to get fuzzy. _No more drinking with Rachel_, I tell myself.

"I agree with that," Embry stands and moves around the foot of the bed, chuckling.  
_  
Crap! Did I say that out loud?_ Embry climbs in behind me, whispering, "Yes, you did. Go back to sleep baby."

I pull my lower lip into my mouth, biting it hard to make sure I don't speak again without knowing it, reminding myself I need to keep quiet. _I don't want to slip and tell him I've fallen in love with him._

He pulls me into his arms but his movements are slow and controlled. Just as I relax against him I feel his hands move up my back to my neck. He begins massaging my neck up to my scalp; it feels like heaven. I start to drift off to sleep when my stomach starts tumbling. _Great._

I don't have time to warn Embry before jumping from the bed and running to the bathroom. I barely make it to the toilet when, what I hope is every ounce of alcohol I consumed last night, makes it's reappearance. Embry doesn't say anything but I can sense his presence behind me. I sit with my head leaning on the edge of the toilet. I hear water running before a cool cloth touches the back of my neck. "Best boyfriend ever," I mutter and Embry chuckles before lifting me from the floor and carrying me back to bed. After he gets me settled I hear him go into the bathroom and shut the door. I assume he's just doing his business but then I hear him talking. By the time he comes back out I've passed out again.

As I'm sleeping, my mind replays parts of last night for me. _Embry dancing with me was such a nice surprise. I didn't expect it, since he doesn't seem like the dancing type, but moving my body against his to the music was such a turn on. He came out a few more times, each time bringing me water, but that wasn't what I wanted. Rachel would roll her eyes at him and order us another shot or cocktail, laughing in his face when I would quickly finish the drinks off. _

My stomach turns thinking about the alcohol and I'm once again running to the bathroom. The cool porcelain of the toilet reminds me of walking back to the car with Embry. _Or more specifically him carrying me. Then there was the making out in the backseat of my car. I was so aggressive then, telling him I wanted to make out while we waited. I can't believe I was that blunt, but he didn't seem to mind. If only we weren't interrupted by Rachel and Paul._

Strong arms again pick me up. Embry cleans me up and carries me to the bed. I'm hopeful this time when I fall asleep it will be more peaceful, but that isn't the case. I feel like I'm on fire with Embry wrapped around me. _In my drunk mind last night, being hot meant I should just take off my top in the car. I could tell Embry wasn't happy with it, but it made sense to me. Then there was Rachel, asking me questions about giving Embry a blow job._

I sit up straight in bed, suddenly remembering what happened when we got home. _Oh my God. I can't believe I did that! Not that it was bad, but still._ I remember all of it, and the more I remember, the more embarrassed I feel. The more embarrassed I get, the more my stomach turns. I run to the bathroom again.

The process is repeated several times before my stomach finally settles and my head starts to ease up a little. Embry doesn't say anything but he keeps me hydrated as much as possible in between bathroom runs and me falling asleep. _And me remembering all the things I did last night. Did I really dig my heels into his thighs? Grab his hand and make him touch me as he drove? How can he even stand to be near me right now?_

"Embry, I'm so sorry for how I acted," I mumble as my eyes start to close again.

He chuckles against my hair, "It's ok, baby. I enjoyed watching you have fun." He whispers low against my ear just as I drift off, "I can't wait for you to be that comfortable around me without alcohol. You were so sexy and beautiful."

When next I wake up I assume it's only a few minutes later, but when I squint at the alarm clock on my nightstand I find it's after three in the afternoon and Embry is still wrapped around me in bed.

"Embry, why aren't you patrolling?" I ask him in as quiet of a voice as I can manage.

He props himself up on his elbow and leans down to kiss my shoulder before answering, "I skipped. There's no way I would have left you here like this. I will always take care of you."

Carefully, I maneuver myself so I can roll over and face him. He looks concerned but he has a smile on his face. "Thank you, Best Boyfriend Ever," I say cupping his face in one of my hands.

"You're welcome, Most Amazing Girlfriend in the World," the grin on his face is stunning.

"You just had to trump me, didn't you?" I giggle then flinch.

"No, I just had to tell the truth," he places his lips against my forehead, whispering. My heart flutters and it's on the tip of my tongue to tell him how I feel, but I hold myself back, making sure to bite my lip to make sure it doesn't slip out unexpectedly. Embry pulls my face down into his neck and slowly caresses his hands up and down my back, making my body relax against his. I realize during that moment that I'm wearing clothes and I lift my face just enough to look down. It's an over sized t-shirt, one that he's left here.

"Did you dress me?"

"Yeah, you were freezing sitting on the bathroom floor," he explains.

"I'm not wearing panties," I realize, saying it out loud before I can stop myself.

"No," Embry laughs into the top of my head, "You aren't. Should I get you a pair to put on?"

"I'm ok like this. I'd rather you not let me go," I admit, cuddling closer to him.

"I'll never let you go, Lillah," Embry whispers in my ear just as I drift off to sleep again.

-0-

When next I wake up, Embry insists that I need to eat something. I lay there for a minute, trying to decide if that is going to be possible. My stomach doesn't turn inside out at the thought, so I agree with him but first I'm going to need a shower. Embry tells me to meet him in the kitchen once I'm ready. I want to kiss him but my mouth is so gross I can't fathom touching my lips to his.

I stand from the bed and watch him walk out of the room, a little sad to see him covered in jeans again. I quickly brush my teeth and wash my face before getting into the shower. The hot water feels like heaven, helping to finally clear my mind. I stand there underneath the spray remembering everything that happened last night. Once the initial embarrassment passes, I find myself smiling. Embry truly was an amazing boyfriend, both last night and today.

Stepping out of the shower, I towel dry my hair, leaving it loose to air dry then pull on yoga pants and one of Embry's shirts he's _conveniently_ left behind for me. I walk into the kitchen, smiling as his smell surrounds me. Embry is standing at the stove, but smiles softly over his shoulder, "Sit down, dinner is almost ready. There's water on the table for you."

Walking up behind him, I circle my arms around him, kissing the back of his neck just below his hairline, "Thank you, for everything."

"You're welcome, Lills," Embry turns around, slowly moving his lips over mine. He stops us before we can go any further, cupping my cheek, "Go sit, drink your water."

Doing as he says, I move to the table, sipping on the water he has placed there. He also has some crackers out; I reach out for one, nibbling on it while he finishes up at the stove. I hear him place something in a skillet that starts sizzling right away. Once the sizzling sound dissipates, I hear him clear his throat before speaking, "Lillah. Um- about what happened last night. How much do you remember?"

"All of it," I admit, taking a gulp of my water as I feel my cheeks heat up again. "Why?"

Embry's shoulders move in what looks like a shrug, but he seems very stiff. He hesitates before speaking, "I just- I mean- what happened. When we got home. I understand if you are too uncomfortable. I know you were drunk last night, but I don't want you to think I expect that or anything. You didn't have to do that last night."

My cheeks flame red and I whisper out my greatest fear, "Was I that bad?"

Embry is beside me so quickly I almost jump out of my chair in surprise. His hands are holding both of my cheeks and he forces me to keep my eyes on him as he kneels beside me on the floor, "You were amazing. You are always amazing. I just want you to know that you didn't have to do that and if you don't want to do it again, I'll understand."

"Embry, you worry about me too much." I gently pull his hands from my face, leaning forward to kiss him. I take a deep breath then explain, "I know I didn't have to do -that." I pause, looking him in the eye, smiling hesitantly I restart, "I know I didn't have to perform oral sex."

Embry's eyes go wide with shock then he starts laughing, "You make it sound so clinical and not at all dirty."

"It wasn't dirty." I smile wider before continuing, "I know I didn't have to; I wanted to. My only regret is that I was drunk, but I definitely plan on trying it again soon, when I'm sober."

"I just don't want you to ever feel pressured into anything, Lills. I know it's a big deal, plus, I wasn't sure if you, um- enjoyed doing it," Embry hesitates.

The fire on my cheeks again flares up but I know I need to calm Embry down about this. Mostly because I really do want to do it again, and if he sees even the slightest hesitation, he won't let it happen. Playing with his ring I look into his eyes, "Embry, I never thought I would ever enjoy doing that to a man, especially after the pressure Carter put me under to do it," Embry growls and I feel a giggle bubble up. I kiss him briefly, "I agree. He pressured, but I never gave in. I didn't want to touch him with any part of me. But with you, it was amazing. _You're _amazing. I definitely enjoyed it, just like I enjoy everything we do together."

"I'm glad to hear that," Embry grins. He stands but leans down to kiss me again, "You and that mouth of yours drive me insane woman." He returns to the stove, but quickly comes back to the table, setting a bowl of tomato soup and a grilled cheese sandwich in front of me before pulling his chair next to mine. He then goes back to the stove, returning with a huge bowl of tomato soup and three grilled cheese sandwiches.

"Hungry?" I giggle when he sits next to me.

"Starving." He grins at me as he quickly finishes off one grilled cheese sandwich.

Sipping my soup slowly I wink at him, "Why is that?"

"My amazing girlfriend wore me out last night by making one of my favorite fantasies come true," Embry grins wide when I feel the blood rush to my face. This doesn't stop him, "On top of that, she just told me she wants to do it again when she's sober. I'm a lucky son of a bitch."

"I'm pretty lucky too, Embry."

-0-

I manage to feel more like normal in time for school on Monday. Between my excitement for our field trip to the Rez this week and my wasted day on Sunday, Monday seems to drag by.

When Tuesday morning finally dawns it is a bright and chilly day. There is a little drizzle, but nothing too bad for Forks. I'm excited to take my sophomores on a field trip to the Rez. They'll learn some of the local history and write a report on a subject of their choosing. Embry is going to meet up and have lunch with us on the beach. I asked him to talk to my students about what it's like to grow up on a reservation and he seemed to be looking forward to it.

We've just left Billy's and I'm walking along with one of the girls on the cheerleading squad, listening to her tell me about going to pow-wows as a little girl. I know I'm not supposed to have favorite students but Erin is one of my brightest; she's also caring and funny, I enjoy talking to her when I get the chance. A few of the boys are walking a distance behind us, talking loudly and being all around obnoxious; so typical teenage boys.

"Miss Hunter," I hear my name being called and glance back to see a couple of the girls jogging to catch up with us.

"Hi girls, learning anything?" I ask with a grin.

"This is actually pretty cool," Kristina admits while looking around. She's smiling and looks excited, which makes me happy. I glance down at the notebook she's clutching and I'm happy to notice she's actually been taking notes.

"Did you know the Quileute's aren't the only local tribe?" Kay asks and I laugh and nod my head.

"The Makah's are also close by. Mr. Call, the man we are going to have lunch with, is half Makah," I tell her as we all fall into step together.

I'm so engrossed in the conversation with the girls I don't notice someone approaching us until the girls begin to giggle. I look at them and notice they are looking ahead of us. I turn to see what they are staring at and my eyes go wide at the beautiful man walking toward us.

"Embry," I can't help the grin that spreads across my face when I see him. He comes running toward me, a smile on his own face. He pulls me into his arms before I realize his intentions. I hug him tightly and pull away, blushing when I hear the boys cat-calling behind us.

Embry frowns at the guys but doesn't spare them much attention, "You ready for lunch?" I nod before taking his hand in mine. He leads us to an area he has set up, including blankets on the beach with baskets of food. He even has a small bonfire set up; which is a good thing, even though it's the middle of the day it has gotten chilly quickly.

Embry spends an hour with my students, answering the well thought out questions as well as the ridiculous ones. He keeps glancing at me every few minutes; a few of the girls happen to notice and start giggling. I shake my head at them and they immediately become quiet, giving Embry the respect he deserves.

While we help Embry pack up everything I notice a few of the football players standing nearby, talking rather loudly.

"Looks like Ms. Hunter likes to slum it," Bruce, one of the boys failing my class, nods his head toward Embry and I feel my back stiffen. Embry narrows his gaze on them and they all immediately shut up. Unfortunately, it's a little too late now. I notice Embry's jaw tense up and his hands shake as he picks up a blanket, folding it haphazardly.

I walk over to Embry, ignoring the watchful stares of the teenagers. "You should probably be getting back to Forks," Embry tells me before I can speak.

I can tell by the tone of his voice that he heard every word that was said. "Will I see you tonight?" I ask in a hushed whisper.

"I don't know. I have some things to get done at home," Embry doesn't look at me as he speaks. He turns to place a blanket on the pile of picnic baskets and I can see the tension in his back.

"Embry, those boys don't know what they are talking about. They are immature teenagers," I begin to tell him before he cuts me off.

"Yeah. It's no big deal," he turns to me. His face looks strained but I can tell that he's trying to hide it from me.

"It _is_ a big deal. They were disrespectful of you. Especially after what you've done for them today. Their words have zero meaning. You are an amazing man, Embry," I tell him earnestly. "I wouldn't be with you if you weren't. A mansion isn't worth anything if the man that owns it is heartless and without a strong sense of character. I would live in a cardboard box if it meant I could have someone like you by my side."

I pause, walking around so that he has to face me before I continue, "You think Carter couldn't give me expensive things? He could, and I didn't want any of them. You take care of yourself, without depending on someone else- without depending on a family name to carry you through life. _He_ is the one I was 'slumming it' with. Not you."

I reach up to touch Embry's face and he finally looks me in the eye. I see something I can't put my finger on pass across his face but it's gone in the blink of an eye. He stares at me for a quiet second before a small smile tugs at his mouth. I have to bite my tongue, to keep from saying what I want to most. _I love _you.

"What's for dinner?" Embry asks me and I know that his concern has passed, at least for now.

I smile softly, my thumb passing over his soft lips. I wish I could kiss him, but I won't do that in front of my students. "I was thinking steaks, baked potatoes and salad."

He rubs his stomach, "Sounds good. I'll see you soon?"

"Yep. I'll be waiting on you," I grin, trying to reassure him.

"Ok," he nods and I watch as he starts to pull me in for a hug but hesitates. "Be careful going back to school," I hesitate for a split second, knowing our first hug earlier was a mistake, but at this point, I don't care. I decide to say the hell with it and pull him in for a hug; I think we both deserve it after today.

"See you soon," I walk backward over to the girls and yell for the boys to hurry it up. In my best teacher voice I instruct the class, "Thank Mr. Call for taking time out of his _busy_ day to talk with you today."

There are a few grumbles from the boys, but most everyone gives their thanks. Embry turns briefly, winking at me before running off to his truck.

-0-

Rachel stops by my room after school, "How was the tour of the Rez?"

"It was fine other than a few of my trouble makers upsetting Embry," I sigh, leaning against the edge of my desk.

"Oh no, what happened?" Rachel sinks into a student chair.

Sitting down next to her I explain the events of the day. Rachel isn't completely surprised, but is disappointed in Embry's reaction. She thankfully changes the subject to her upcoming wedding and I get wrapped up listening to her explain her plans.

Its not until I hear Rachel's phone beep with a text message that I realize it has turned dark outside. I'm shocked by how long we've sat here, just talking.

Rachel snorts, turning the phone to show me the screen. There is a text message from Paul there, "I'm horny and hungry. In that order. Where are you?"

"Oh, wow," I giggle as she types out a response. "Guess we had better get home, I promised Embry steaks tonight."

Rachel's eyebrows raise sharply, "Steaks? What are you buttering him up for?"

"Nothing," nibbling on my lip I look up at her, "I just don't want him to be upset over what happened this afternoon."

Rachel shrugs, standing up, "I don't think he will be."

Following her movements, I stand up, hugging her briefly, "Yeah. That's what I'm hoping."

"Let me know how it goes. Don't forget, tomorrow, final dress fitting for me and we find dresses for the rest of you." Rachel turns to leave, "You might want to bring a change of clothes, we are all meeting here. Mind driving?"

"I don't mind, but will we all fit in the Acura?"

Rachel grins, "Emily is bringing Claire and Eli, so she'll drive separately. Kim, Ness, and I will ride with you. See you tomorrow!"

I wave at her as she leaves. Turning back to my desk, I start packing up for the evening. I'm reaching across my desk for my purse when I feel warm hands grip my hips. Gasping as I lift up I turn my head to see Embry's smiling face looking down at me.

"If this is the view your students get everyday, I might need to enroll in this school to protect you," Embry growls against my neck as I sink back into him.

Sighing happily, I reach my hands back to slide my fingers along the back of his neck, "No need, Embry, I behave around my student's. I was just too lazy to walk around my desk."

"Good thing I walked in when I did, then." Embry's lips move down my neck, groaning, "I'm a sick bastard."

Pulling away from his lips I turn around to look him in the eye, "You aren't a sick bastard, Em! Why do you say that? You are a wonderful man."

"When I saw you bent over that desk, all I could think about was all the ways I could have sex with you there. Starting with pulling your pants down and burying myself in you." Embry glances down at my lips, frowning, "Like I said, I'm a sick bastard."

Gripping my fingers tight in his hair, I try to control the tremors coursing through my body at his words. As much as I would love to act on his idea, I can't. Shaking my head slowly, I whisper, "We can't do that here, Embry."

"I know. You deserve better than that." Embry pulls my hands from his hair, slowly stepping back, "You deserve better than me."

Stepping closer to him, I wrap my arms around his waist, resting my ear against his chest. I can easily hear his strong heartbeat and it relaxes me slightly, "Embry, you're wrong."

He doesn't say anything, but he does move his arms to circle me again. I tilt my face to look into his eyes. There is a sadness there I've never seen before, and it breaks my heart, "What I deserve is a wonderful man that takes care of me when I'm an idiot and drink too much. Someone that will take time out of his day to talk to my students. I deserve a man with a big heart that cares about his friends as if they were his family." Taking a deep breath I whisper out a small slice of my heart, "I deserve to be with the man I want to be with. I want to be with you, Embry."

"I want to be with you too, Lillah." Embry pauses, brushing his thumb over my cheek before whispering, "Are you sure?"

Smiling softly I lift up on my tip toes, brushing my lips against his, "Of course I'm sure. I don't agree to make steaks for just anyone."

"That's right, you did promise me steaks," Embry chuckles, stepping back but grasping one of my hands in his.

"Come on, let's go home," I reach for my purse, then turn off the lights as we walk out of the building together.

-0-

Embry is laying back on the couch, rubbing his stomach and moaning about being stuffed. I grin at him, poking at his distended belly. "It's no wonder, you ate two whole steaks, salad, your baked potato and half of mine," I tease before sitting across his legs.

"I couldn't help it, Lills. It was too good. If you keep feeding me like this I'll have to be rolled everywhere I go."

I giggle at him and shake my head, knowing his metabolism is off the charts, "I considered making cinnamon rolls for dessert. I guess you can't handle any more?"

"What? Of course I can! I'll be good to go in an hour," he grins at me and pulls me down into his arms. I cuddle against his side and tangle our legs together, relaxing against him completely.

"What should we do tonight?" I ask as my eyes drift shut.

"I don't know. What would you like to do? Movie?" Embry begins rubbing a hand up and down my back, relaxing me further. I lay against him, quietly thinking about what I'd like to do for the rest of the evening.

-0-

Slowly opening my eyes I glance up to find Embry watching me, smiling. His lips move over my neck, but I can feel the rumble of laughter in his chest, "I might start taking it personally if you keep falling asleep on me. Am I that boring?"

"No, you are _that_ comfy to snuggle up to. I can't help that having you close makes me feel comfortable and safe," I tell him with a yawn.

"You keep that up and I won't let you go to work today," I laugh at Embry's admission, pushing myself up to kiss his lips. I realize then that we are in bed; Embry must have carried me. I can't believe I slept all night without waking up. _He really is my comfort zone._

I sigh against his lips, "Unfortunately, I have a test scheduled for today. And the girls and I are going shopping after school. For Rachel and Paul's wedding."

"I'm scared to know what you are shopping for," Embry winks at me, causing my heart to stutter.

"Rachel's wedding dress and our bridesmaid dresses, of course!"

"Riiight. How could I forget? The wedding is all Paul talks about. He's worse than a girl." Embry laughs and I easily join him. While I haven't heard Paul talking about the wedding, just based on how he treats Rachel, I can only guess he's just as excited as she is.

I do my best to clear my face of my smile before shaking my head at him, "Be nice. They are both excited. I can't say that I blame them. If it were me, I would be pretty excited too."

Embry doesn't say anything, just nods his head and rubs his hand up and down my back. When he does this it always relaxes me but that's the last thing I need. I should be up and getting ready for work, "Mmm, Embry, if you don't stop that, I'll never get out of this bed." He playfully growls, frowning when he hears my words but it turns into a grin. Seeing him this happy makes my heart flutter. I lean up to kiss his lips before jumping out of the bed. "I need a shower!" I call over my shoulder and he climbs out of bed, following me.

I giggle when Embry comes up behind me, pulling me back into him, "Embry! I really have to get ready." He begins kissing along my neck and I lean back into his chest.

"How about I take a shower with you?" He mumbles softly against my neck.

"Um," my heart stutters at the thought of sharing a shower with Embry. I can feel the heat building between my legs and I barely contain my moan as I speak, "I would really love that but won't it make both of us late?"

"Probably. And I might get my ass chewed out if I don't open on time."

It takes all my will power to pull away from Embry. Turning to face him I stand on my tip toes to kiss him. I love these moments with him because they make it all seem so real. I've never had a relationship like this; where a man is happy to see me every day. Where he actually wants to talk to me and cares about what I think and say. Embry is the man I thought I'd never have but always wanted. I try not to think about it too much but it scares me a little, to think I will likely lose him at some point.

Embry drops his face and kisses the side of my neck before releasing me. He goes over to the shower and turns the water on. "You go ahead, I can be at the shop in no time. You have to actually drive and be all human to get to work," Embry winks and I swat at him as he walks out.

I shower quickly, leaving my hair to dry naturally, running some product through it and scrunching with my hands, creating soft curls. I open the bathroom door to find Embry grinning at me. I half expected him to be gone but I'm thrilled to know he waited. I do my make-up, smiling when Embry walks into the bathroom, puts the toilet lid down and watches me. "You are too beautiful to cover your face with that stuff," he tells me and I can't stop the little giggle that erupts.

"It's meant to enhance, not cover," I explain and finish up with my mascara before I turn to drop a kiss on the tip of his nose. Embry places his hands on my hips and pulls me close. "Ah ah, none of that. We both need to go." He backs me away from him and stands, kissing me quickly on the lips.

"Yeah, you're right. I'll see you tonight. You girls don't get into too much trouble," he tells me and winks. I walk Embry to the back door, kiss him goodbye and head to school with a spring in my step.

-0-

As the end of the school day draws near, I'm getting excited about this afternoon with the girls. Once they all arrive we turn into a bunch of giggling school girls, hugging and laughing like we haven't seen each other in weeks. We are all excited about going wedding shopping and hate that we have to separate into two cars, but know it's necessary. Claire waves at Kim, Rachel, Ness and I as we pull out of the school parking lot.

"How are you doing, Ness?" I ask once we are on the road.

"I'm good, thanks, Lillah. How are you? Did you and Rachel have a good day?"

"Yeah, my classes were actually pretty calm today. My seniors had a test and I was able to flip through some of them at lunch. I'm pretty happy with how they did," I tell her, grinning as I glance up into the rear view mirror.

"Well, you might teach little angels, Lillah, but I have a few hellions," Rachel says while laughing.

"Come on, Rachel. You love them all," Ness giggles from the back seat.

"I do, the little punks," she admits and we all laugh.

The conversation doesn't slow down during the entire drive to the dress shop. When we arrive, the girls and I pile out of the the cars, bursting through the shop door. This is Rachel's final dress fitting and when we see her in it, we all make the appropriate comments, which makes her grin sassily at us. Seeing her this happy makes her look ever more beautiful than she normally does.

"Paul is going to love it, Rach," Kim sighs.

"I know!" She squeals and we all laugh at how excited she is. "It's sexy too, right? I definitely wanted something that wasn't just your average wedding dress."

"Absolutely sexy!" Emily grins and we all nod in agreement.

Rachel hops down from the platform and instead of going into the dressing room to take it off, she walks around the shop with us while we look for our bridesmaid dresses. Rachel decided that we could all pick out our own dress style and just wear the same color. Since they are getting married on the beach, we all want to go for something flowy.

"Don't forget to find something sexy!" Rachel calls across the room to myself and Emily as we look through one rack. "Except you, Ness. I don't want your parents mad at me."

Ness laughs and makes a little face before admitting "Yeah, especially my dad."

Claire grabs my hand, pulling me away from the rack I'm currently flipping through, "Miss Lillah, Aunt Emmy said I could pick out my dress too. Would you come help me?"

Glancing over at Emily to make sure it's ok, I smile when she gives me a slight nod, never stopping bouncing Eli on her hip. I follow Claire to another section of the store. I was expecting her to take me to the flower girl dresses, but instead we stop in the wedding dress section.

"Claire," I kneel down to her level, "why are we over here? These dresses won't fit you sweetie."

"I know they won't fit me _now_ Miss Lillah. I want to find my dress for when I marry my Quily," I do my best to hold my laughter in but it's so hard.

"Oh, Claire, I think you have plenty of time to decide on a dress for that. We need to find you a dress for Rachel's wedding."

Claire frowns for a second, "Oh." Then, her face turns to a pleading grin as she begs, "Can't we just look at the pretty dresses for just five minutes, please?"

I give in. I can't tell her no. The five minutes easily turns into ten minutes. Claire drags me all over the store looking at the wedding dresses, going on and on when we stop at each one, telling me how much she loves it. I manage to smile and nod, going along with what she says, until we get to one dress near the back of the store. I've never put much thought into what I would want for a wedding dress, but I'm struck by the classic beauty of this dress; off-white all lace with a satin sash in the middle, strapless, and fitted throughout until it flares out around the knee.

Claire gasps when she sees the dress, "Miss Lillah! It's _so_ pretty!"

"Yes, it is, Claire," I'm holding back my laughter because this has been her reaction to just about every dress she's shown me.

"There you two are," I turn to find Emily with Eli on one hip and about ten dresses tossed over her free arm.

Running to her I go to grab the dresses, but she laughs, "Take the kid, he's killing me."

"Are you built like your daddy, Eli?" I grin, pulling him into my arms as Emily sighs in relief.

"Come on Claire, I've got a few dresses for you to try on," Emily holds her hand out for Claire.

Claire skips over to us, but tugs Emily back toward the dress, "Aunt Emmy, you need to see this. It's _so_ beautiful."

Emily sighs, but follows Claire. Knowing they are going back to the dress we were just looking at, I decide to follow, giggling when Eli's fingers tangle in my hair. When I walk up behind them I can easily hear Claire speaking, "Isn't it pretty Aunt Emmy? I think Miss Lillah would look like Ariel in that dress."

I nearly choke on her words, blushing fiercely when Emily turns around, a huge grin on her face, "Oh my gosh, Claire, you are so right. She would look like Ariel."

"Come on you two, we need to try on dresses," I turn, hoping they follow.

Thankfully, they do, but they are still talking about it when we walk into the dressing rooms. Kim and Ness are already there, swinging around the mirrors in flowing dresses. Rachel has changed and is flipping through a catalog of veils when we approach.

"About time, I was going to send out a search party," Rachel grins as Emily and Claire walk into a dressing room. I roll my eyes as I hear they are still discussing Ariel.

Turning to Rachel I hand Eli over, sighing at the immediate loss I feel without the adorable baby close, "I'll be back, I was with Claire, so I haven't found anything yet."

"Lillah, why don't you just try on some of the ones I've found," Kim points at a few dresses hanging on an open dressing room door.

I wave my hands, "I'm sure they wouldn't fit-."

"Oh stop it, Lillah. You aren't any bigger than the rest of us, except for upstairs maybe," Rachel wiggles her eyebrows.

Kim laughs then turns to me, "Don't worry, I picked out dresses that have extra material in the top, since my boobs are already growing. Stupid huge wolf baby." Kim winks at me.

"I guess I could try on one or two," I give in reluctantly.

Kim grabs two dresses off the door, telling me they didn't fit her right. Grabbing my own dressing room I quickly change into the first dress. It's strapless and more fitted than I would like; I feel like my breasts are overflowing out the top and my stomach sticks out further than my boobs. Rachel bellows for me to show her, so I step out hesitantly.

"Sexy mama!" Rachel catcalls which makes Eli clap excitedly.

I roll my eyes at her, "I don't think so, my boobs are up to my chin and my stomach looks huge in this."

"Whatever, you look sexy. Try on the other one, though," Rachel grins, waving at me to get back in the dressing room.

I easily slip out of the first dress and pull on the second. This one is a soft chiffon which thankfully has more than spaghetti straps. While the dress is sleeveless, the straps are wide and gently swoop down into a little bit deeper v-neck than I would typically wear. There is a satin ribbon just below the breasts and another one a few inches lower, the dress flowing out softly from second satin ribbon. While Rachel told us blue, this is a rich royal blue color, which doesn't look too bad next to my pale skin. I spin once, holding in my giggle when I see the dress flare out. My always problematic breasts don't look too bad; they stick out a little, but I'm sure a bra that is lower cut will help.

"Stop pretending you are a princess in there and get your sexy butt out here so I can approve that dress!" Rachel calls out. Shaking my head at Rachel I'm a little more confident as I step out in this dress.

Kim nods as soon as she sees me, "That is perfect for you, Lillah."

Rachel, Ness and Emily agree. Eli blows a few bubbles at me and Claire nods, "You look very pretty, Miss Lillah."

As I go to step into the dressing room, Emily walks up to me, whispering, "I have a huge favor to ask you, Lillah."

"Sure, what do you need?" I try not to let my imagination run wild as I wait for Emily to respond.

She smiles softly, "Well, it's for Claire, actually. She can't stop talking about that dress. She wants to see if you really look like Ariel, you know, The Little Mermaid?"

I try not to look as panicked as I feel as I whisper back, "You want me to try on a wedding dress? But Emily, I'm not getting married."

"I know, it's silly, but Claire is dying to see you in it," she smiles softly. Her grin growing a little wider she winks, "Come on, haven't you ever tried on wedding dresses just for fun?"

"No, I've-," I have to bite my tongue._ I've never had a reason to try on a wedding dress._

"It will be super quick, I'll help you in." Emily pulls me in for a quick hug, "Thanks for this!"

Before I know it, Emily has pulled me into the dressing room, is taking off the bridesmaid dress then helps me into the wedding dress.

I really don't want to see myself in this dress. Not because I don't think it will be lovely, just the opposite; I know it will be beautiful. The problem is, the only person I would want to wear it for will never see it. Keeping my eyes closed so I can't see my reflection, I turn to Emily, easily hearing her gasp, "Is it that bad?"

"No," she whispers before taking my hand and escorting me out to the main area so Claire can see me. She helps me step up on the little platform and I slowly open my eyes just enough to see Claire. She has the most beautiful grin on her face.

"Aunt Emmy, pull Miss Lillah's hair down," Claire instructs. I had pulled my hair back before trying on dresses, just because I was getting hot in the store. Emily reaches over, pulling the ponytail holder out of my hair, letting it fall around my shoulders.

Claire gasps and I see Rachel, Ness, and Kim's eyes all go wide before huge smiles cross their faces. Claire whispers in a shocked voice, "You really do look like Ariel, Miss Lillah. You are so beautiful."

Rachel starts moving her head up and down, "I agree, Claire. Lillah, you must have this dress when you get married."

"You say that like it's inevitable. You don't know that I'm ever going to get married, Rachel," I do my best not to get sucked in, laughing as I try to blow Rachel off.

Kim smiles, "Regardless, you look amazing in that dress, Lillah. Turn around."

When I spin around to show the back to the girls, I catch my reflection and I stop. I don't recognize the woman standing in front of me. She looks beautiful, happy, in love. _I want to be her. _Holding back my tears I step off the platform, walking quickly for dressing room, not stopping to make sure Emily is with me.

Thankfully, she is, and as soon as the dressing room door closes, she is releasing the back and helping me out of the gorgeous dress. I swipe at a few tears that have escaped before I pull on my jeans and t-shirt. I grab the blue dress, plastering a fake smile on my face, "Ready?"

"Yeah," Emily agrees, but grabs the wedding dress I just tried on, throwing it over her arm.

"Can't you just leave that in here with the other dresses?" I ask as we walk out, heading toward the registers.

Emily shrugs, "They frown on that kind of stuff with the wedding dresses. I'm just going to give it to the girl at the sales counter so she can put it back."

I quickly pay for the blue dress, turning to join the other girls as we head out of the shop. Rachel proceeds to drag us to another store to find matching shoes, and then to the lingerie store, insisting I need a plunging bra for the dress. Giving in, I try one on with the dress and I'm surprised how right she was. It helps to hold my breasts in, doesn't show in the deep-v neckline, and she actually manages to find a sexy black lace version. She also finds a matching black lace panty, or thong to be exact.

I try to fight her on this, but she insists that Embry will die when he sees me not only in the dress, but when he sees me in these undergarments. I cave, mostly because I'm exhausted and ready to get home to Embry, but also because a little part of me knows she's right; Embry will love the thong. _He's such an ass man._

When we finally leave the lingerie store, Emily asks if we mind stopping off at the costume shop. Claire starts jumping up and down, "Aunt Emmy, are we getting my Halloween costume? I promised Quily I wouldn't be anything scary. What's Eli going to be?"

Emily leads a chatty Claire into the store, carrying Eli on her hip. Ness, Rachel, Kim and I wander around, checking out costumes. Rachel asks what we are all going to dress up as for Halloween. When they all turn to me I shrug, "Same thing I am every year, a witch."

"Oh no, we have to change that! You need something sexy for Halloween. Something that will knock Embry to his knees!" Rachel giggles.

Shaking my head at Rachel I can't hold back my laughter, "Rachel, I can't do that, I want to hand out candy."

"You can be sexy and still hand out candy. The sexiest costumes tease instead of reveal," Kim winks at me.

Rachel grins at Kim, "Exactly! Leave this to me Lillah. I'm going to find you the perfect Halloween costume."

"Make sure it's something I can wear my witch costume over!" I shout after Rachel as she walks off through the store.

Rachel waves her hands and I turn back to Kim and Ness, sighing, "I'm in so much trouble."

"No you aren't, Lillah." Ness giggles, covering her mouth with her hand, "But it sounds like Embry will be."

We walk around for a few minutes, catching up with Emily, Eli, and Claire, who is clutching a costume to her chest, beaming, "I found the perfect costume."

Once everyone is done in the store we decide to stop at a small restaurant, grabbing a light meal mostly so the kids can have some dinner. Rachel refuses to tell me what costume she picked out for me, just that Embry will die and I'll see it on Halloween. I'm holding Eli while Emily finishes up, bouncing him on my knee as he gurgles out little noises of excitement. Emily grins at me, "You really are good with him, Lillah."

"Oh, thanks. He's amazing."

"He really is," Emily pauses then sits up straight. Clearing her throat she looks at me pointedly, "How would you and Embry feel about babysitting Eli and Claire on Saturday? Sam and I are going away for the night to celebrate our five year anniversary a few days early."

I nearly choke at her words. Once I clear my throat, I jump at the chance to watch the kids, thinking it will be fun to spend time with them and Embry. Claire is excited too, asking if we are coming over to her house or if she can stay at my house. I raise my eyebrows at Emily, unsure how to respond. Emily smiles at Claire, "We'll talk with Uncle Sam, see what he says. But we still have to make sure Uncle Embry is ok with it too."

Claire agrees, but can't calm down. Once we all finish eating we pile into the two cars before heading back to Forks High School. Our trip back is once again pleasant, as we discuss the dresses we found and the plans for next Saturday.

Once I've dropped the girls off I quickly head home, excited to see Embry again. When I walk into the house I don't see him right away. I call his name softly and he responds from the kitchen. I drop my purchases off in the bedroom then make a beeline for the kitchen. When I walk in he's making a sandwich. "Want one?" I shake my head and grin at him as he continues speaking, "I couldn't wait until dinner. I'm starving."

"Somehow, I am not surprised by this," I giggle and walk over to kiss his cheek. Embry turns back to the counter and continues placing sliced turkey on his bread. "How was shopping?"

"It was good. I found a dress," I smile at him brightly, excited about my purchase.

Embry grins, looking up at me, "You did? Can I see you in it?"

"No, you have to wait for the wedding to see me _in_ it. Mmm, maybe I'll show it to you though." I jump up to sit on the counter top so I can watch him.

"That's a deal," he tells me while licking mayonnaise off of his thumb. He picks his sandwich up and offers me a bite before taking one himself.

"What do you want for dinner?" I ask while we both chew.

"I don't know. You know me, I'm not picky."

"Burgers?"

"Yeah, that sounds good. Can you make those really good fries you made that other time?"

I laugh when he refers to the homemade fries I cooked last time we had burgers. "Sure, I can do that," I tell him. "You want to take care of the burgers while I start cutting up potatoes?"

"Ok," he shoves the rest of his sandwich in his mouth before standing between my legs and placing his hands on my thighs. He watches me as he chews. I just sit there and grin at him like an idiot. He leans forward and kisses me after swallowing his last bite. Before I have time to really get into it Embry pulls away and grins at my pout. "Let's get cookin'."

I hop down off of the counter after Embry backs away. We go about prepping dinner, talking about our work days and my time with the girls after school. Embry randomly steals kisses while we work and I am unable to wipe the smile off of my face. I can't imagine a better way to spend an evening than to be here with him, doing something as simple as making dinner. After we sit down to eat Embry scoots his chair closer to mine. He leans over randomly, kissing me on the lips, cheek or neck. I've never had a more romantic meal, even though the atmosphere is far from romantic and the food is casual.

Embry again offers to do the dishes, but I tell him I'll take care of it. He sits at the table and talks to me while I wash everything up. "I need to pick up some candy for trick-or-treaters," I tell him, speaking over my shoulder.

"You want to do that tomorrow after you get out of school? I'm happy to tag along."

I peek over my shoulder to make sure he's not just saying this, surprised when I see him grinning from ear-to-ear, "Sure, we can do that. We can pick up things to make pizza from scratch."

"Mmm I'll never want another delivery pizza again."

"You got that right. My dough and sauce are both homemade," I tell him with a smirk. _I'm not cocky about many things but I know I'm a great cook and I take pride in that._

"Don't tease, baby. I'll be thinking about it all night now," Embry pouts dramatically.

"Maybe," I dry my hands as I speak, turning to face him, "I can distract you until then?"

"It's possible," he says with a too casual shrug. Embry reaches out, takes my hand and gently pulls me toward him. We both smile at one another when I move to stand between his legs. I place my hands on each side of his face and drop my head to kiss him. Embry's hands move to my hips and he pulls me a little closer. "Let's go make-out," he announces suddenly and I drop my head back and start laughing.

"You got straight to the point, didn't you?" I ask, lifting my head and grinning at him.

"Well, you did say you were willing to distract me," he reminds me. _As if I could forget what I said two seconds ago._ I lean down and kiss him again before stepping back. Embry stands and I take his hand in mine, tugging him behind me. "Where are you taking me?" Embry asks from behind me.

I grin but don't turn to look at him, "To make out. I thought that's what you wanted to do," I explain as we walk toward the bedroom.

Embry doesn't say anything, he only grunts and the sound makes me giggle. "Are you serious?" He almost sounds like an excited kid and I turn to face him, walking backwards through the bedroom door.

"I don't joke about making out with my boyfriend," smirking up at him I place a chaste kiss on his cheek as I close the bedroom door behind him, locking it just in case.

Embry's fingers twist in my hair as his hands cup my head, pulling me gently to him. His lips find mine easily and I instantly sink into him. As our tongues brush against each other, his hands move down my body, easily picking me up. I sigh happily when he lays me down on the bed, never breaking our contact. He sinks onto the bed next to me before pulling me up to rest on his chest. My fingers sink into his silky hair and I tug a little harder than I intended. I can't help the grin when he gasps out, breaking our kiss, "Damn woman!"

"I'm sorry, did I hurt you?" I feign innocence, knowing good and well he's fine.

Embry groans, "You are evil and will be the death of me."

"I hope not," I sigh, my lips moving along his jawline to his ear. "I'd like to keep you around for a while yet," I mumble before running my tongue along the outside of his ear.

I can feel his entire body shake for a brief second. Remembering what it looked like when he phased, I lean back to make sure that was enjoyment and not something else. Embry's eyes are closed and his jaw set, which worries me. His eyelids flash open and his dark brown eyes are locked with mine. He takes a deep breath the speaks slowly, "Why don't you show me that dress?"

"You ok?" Sliding my hand to his cheek, I do my best not to break our eye contact.

Embry nods, "I will be, you just distract me too much sometimes. I need to calm down some before we can continue." He pushes a stray piece of hair behind my ear, "You drive me insane, Lills. I nearly lost all self control."

Sliding to sit on the edge of the bed, I glance back at Embry, whispering as I stand, "I like when you lose control."

I hear Embry groan behind me, but I don't turn around; I know if I do I'll just beg him to make love to me. Instead, I move to the closet, pulling out the bag that contains the bridesmaid's dress. Unzipping the bag I pull the dress out before turning back to Embry. He whistles when he sees the dress, his eyes growing wide, "You are going to look amazing in that dress."

"Thanks," smiling at him I zip the bag back up, returning it to my closet. Grabbing a pair of shorts and one of his t-shirts I turn to the bathroom, "I'm just going to get changed."

When I walk back out to the bedroom Embry has all the lights out except the one on my bedside table, the sheets pulled back and he's wearing, I'm assuming, just his boxers. I climb into bed, snuggling up against him. When he kisses me on the top of my head, I kiss his chest above his heart, whispering, "Better?"

"No," Embry chuckles, "but I'm under control again. Tell me about your day, that should help keep me focused on something other than, well, you."

Shaking my head, I try to understand, "You want me to tell you about my day to distract you from thinking about me? It's a good thing you are so adorable, Embry Call."

He chuckles softly, "Just tell me what all went on today."

Giving in, I proceed to tell him about everything that happened. I finally remember to mention about babysitting Claire and Eli and Embry is practically jumping out of the bed he's so excited at the prospect. Checking the clock I realize it's nine-thirty; borderline, but I decide to go ahead and text Emily.

_Embry is as excited as Claire was this afternoon at the idea of us babysitting. Just let me know when/where. Talk soon! ~L_

My phone beeps back a few moments later. _Sam says your place, he doesn't want you two having sex in our bed. Drop the kids off around 3 on Sat?_ _~Emily_

_Works for me! ~L_

I quickly tell Embry the plan before curling back up against him, discussing my day. Slowly we begin touching one another again, beginning with Embry's hands exploring my body as I speak. Then when I ask him questions, my lips explore him. Tonight is a slow burn, building up as we talk and touch. While it may be slow, it's no less intense. Embry knows my body so well, managing to turn me to jell-o with a few well placed kisses. But instead of sending me over the edge like he normally does, he keeps pulling back, slowing us down again. It's maddening and exciting at the same time. My body is tense, ready for it's release, but also anticipating Embry building me up all over again.

Unable to handle his teasing any longer, I take matters into my own hands, literally. I reach down into his boxers, grasping his erection for dear life. Embry tosses his head back, a guttural cry ripping out of his chest, a mixture of a moan and howl. He quickly rolls off of me, causing my hands to be removed from his boxers. Growling slightly myself I sit up on my knees, pouting, "I wasn't done."

"I'm sorry baby, it's just too much," Embry speaks between clenched teeth, not opening his eyes.

Using the opportunity of his distraction, I make a snap decision, quickly pulling his boxers down before taking him in my mouth. Embry roars, sitting up quickly, his fingers burying themselves in my hair. I expect him to remove me, but instead, he starts directing me, gently pushing or pulling my head. I move to lay across the bed, freeing my hands to play with the rest of him. One hand grips his shaft, moving in time with my mouth, while the other teases up his thighs.

The feeling of Embry filling my mouth is exhilarating and over whelming. All I can think is I want more, I want him to make love to me. Just as I'm swirling my tongue around his head on an upward stroke I suddenly realize he has moved one of his hands from my hair to my upper thigh. Before I can do more than gasp I feel one of his fingers enter me. On my groan my mouth sinks back down on him, knowing he's close.

He slips another finger in me, moving at the same tempo as my mouth on him. Knowing we both need this release, I slide my hand from his thigh to gently cup his balls. I hear him scream my name just before I feel him cumming in my mouth. I'm still a little shocked by how much I enjoy oral sex with Embry but I don't have time to focus on that as my own orgasm takes over my body.

Once we both calm down, Embry tugs me until I'm curled up against him. He places kisses on every part of me he can reach. I can hear he's saying something as he does this, but my tired brain can't figure out what he's saying. My eyes close on their own and in my dreams my mind teases me with what it hopes he was whispering.

"My Lillah. My love. My life. My imprint. Mine, always."

-0-

I'm walking out of school on Thursday with Rachel, chatting happily about her final plans for the wedding, when she pauses halfway across the parking lot, swearing under her breath. I look up to find Embry leaning against my car, grinning.

"Geez, Embry, why don't you just become a teacher?" Rachel grumbles.

Embry sticks his tongue out at Rachel, "Good to see you too, Rach."

"Be nice you two," I lean against Embry's side, smiling when he tucks me under his arm. "Rachel, how about I come help you with the favors tomorrow after school?"

"Actually, that would work out great," Embry jumps in, smiling wide.

Rachel glares at Embry, tapping her foot against the damp pavement, "Why?"

"So suspicious. Paul and I were talking today, I was planning on coming by tomorrow after patrols to clean out my old room," Embry grins at Rachel but doesn't look down at me.

Rachel beams, "Really? Yeah, that's fine, I'll cook dinner. You and Paul can clean out that room while Lillah and I work on the favors."

"Deal, now my girlfriend promised me homemade pizza. I just have to buy the ingredients," Embry pulls me toward the car.

Rachel laughs, "Alright, see you tomorrow, Lillah. Later, Embry."

Waving at Rachel I let Embry get me settled in the passenger seat, handing him the keys. While he adjusts the seat for his height, I try to figure out what I'm going to say to him. Finally, when he starts up the car, I clear my throat, "Embry, I never said you had to buy the ingredients."

"I know," he smiles over at me briefly before pulling out of the parking lot. "I want to. You shouldn't have to pay to feed me all the time."

Shaking my head I roll my eyes, "Embry, I told you, I make too much food, you are helping me by eating it all."

"Still, I like contributing. This is the least I can do," Embry speaks softly. There is still a smile on his face, but he's gripping the steering wheel a little tighter than necessary.

Crossing my arms over my chest I wait until he pulls into the parking lot, twisting in my seat to look him in the eye, "Embry, I appreciate you wanting to help out, but I don't expect you to."

"I want to help- Lillah- I mean." Embry stops, looking away, "I make enough money to be able to contribute, Lillah. I'm not rich and I'll never be rich, like you-"

"Embry. Stop." Cutting him off I get out of the car, walking to the other side. Embry is proud, I've known this since that Friday night at the diner. I know money is an issue for him. As much as I wish it wasn't, as much as I wish he could feel like we are equals, I know this is something that worries him. Opening up the driver's door I look him square in the eyes, "Embry, my parents have money, not me. You do realize that even with a masters degree I make less than thirty thousand dollars a year."

His eyes go wide with shock, "What? That's less than I make at the shop!"

"Exactly. I'm not rich, either. I am lucky that my parents handed down the family home to me in Forks. My dad bought this car but I'm paying him back. So while I don't make a lot of money, I also don't spend a lot of money. I don't mind you contributing, but I don't expect it."

Embry sighs, looking away from me as he speaks, "You should expect it, Lillah. A good man would be able to take care of you."

"Embry, you are a good man. Taking care of me does not mean you have to pay for everything. You take care of me every single day." Sliding my hand over his cheek I pull until he is again looking at me, "No one else took care of me when I had a hangover. You make sure I eat, even when I'm not hungry. You protect me every day from all the myths that are real. You saved me from that jerk of an ex-boyfriend of mine."

"That's not exactly what I meant, Lills." Embry's fingers find my friendship ring, and he starts playing with it.

Kissing the side of his mouth I grin, "I know, Em. If you want to pay, that's fine, I just don't want you to feel like you have to. I would have bought all this even if you weren't around. You take care of me by eating all this food I cook."

"Now you are just making stuff up," Embry smiles, though it doesn't quite reached his eyes. I step back to give him room to get out of the car. Embry hands me my purse once he's out. Making sure the USB drive is still in my purse, I grab his hand walking toward the store.

Once we enter I head for the photo development area. Embry looks at me like I'm crazy, which makes me laugh, "I need to get my pictures printed out." I hand over the USB drive to the technician, filling out the form as he finds the files.

As we walk away Embry points back over his shoulder, "You know that guy was checking you out, right?"

"Who?" I turn to Embry, shocked.

"The photo guy." Embry leans down, whispering, "He was talking to your boobs. I didn't like it."

Taking Embry's hand in mine, I move the cart through the store. Glancing back over my shoulder, I'm surprised to see the photo technician frowning at our joined hands. _Huh. Who knew?_ I grin up at Embry, "He can check them out all he wants. They are taken, just like the rest of me."

His smile finally reaches his eyes as he leans down to give me a quick peck on the lips, "Damn right they are taken. Mine."

My heart flutters, remembering my dream from last night, but I push that out of my mind. Moving to the Halloween candy aisle I can't contain my laughter when I see Embry's eyes go wide at all the options, "Holy shit."

"Em, have you ever handed out candy?" I giggle behind my hand.

"No, I used to take on extra patrols on Halloween, protect the kids just in case," I find myself falling more in love with him. This man spends his entire life thinking about everyone but himself.

Grabbing two small bags and placing them in the cart I look back at Embry, "Will everything be ok if you don't patrol?"

"Seth volunteered to patrol on Halloween, but I'm sure it will be fine, I've never see anything happen." Embry pauses looking at the cart, "Why don't you get more?"

"I'm sure we won't get many trick-or-treaters." Since no one has lived in the house in a few years, the kids have probably gotten accustomed to skipping my house.

Embry frowns, then grabs two huge bags of candy, grinning at me "I'll eat whatever we don't hand out."

Pushing the cart toward the grocery section I roll my eyes, "As long as you eat it. I can't have any candy, I've gained five pounds since I met you."

"Not even peanut M&M's?" Embry whispers against my ear. I feel chills move down my spine while at the same moment I feel my entire chest and face flush. I bite my lip to keep from making any noises but I shake my head. This causes Embry to laugh as he whispers again, "Melted peanut M&M's?"

I walk faster, just to try to get away from him, but I can hear his deep laughter behind me. Focusing on my task, I grab the list and start tossing ingredients in the cart. Once I'm done, I reluctantly let Embry take the cart to pay for the groceries while I go pick up the pictures. I pay for the prints, giggling when I realize Embry was right about the photo technician checking me out. _It must be because I'm dating someone._ I heard once men are only interested in women they can't have. _That must be it._

Embry walks up behind me as I open the photos just to flip through. I made a collage of all the pictures of the other couples, along with printing out my favorite pictures of each of them. I'm going to get them specially framed and give them as Christmas presents. I also had the picture Rachel took of Embry and I printed, twice.

When I get to the last picture I had printed, the one I took on the cliffs with the tiny wolf in the corner, Embry stares closely before speaking as low as possible for me to hear, "Is that me?"

I don't trust my voice, so I move my head up and down. Embry growls, "Watch the cart, I'll be right back."

Unsure what's going on, I agree. A few minutes later, he's back with a bag in his hand. We walk out of the store and place the bags in the back of the car. Once we are settled Embry asks to see the pictures. When he finds the cliffs picture he pulls it out, along with a picture frame from the bag he is still holding in his hands. He starts taking the frame apart as he speaks, "When did you take this, Lills?"

"The day of the bonfire," I squeak out. I don't think he's angry, but I'm still nervous.

Embry looks up at me then, "What? You've had it for that long? How did you know it was me?"

"I didn't, I swear, Embry. I was just taking pictures that day up at the cliffs. I didn't even realize you were in the picture until the next day," I trail off, remembering how that next day started. _That was the first night Embry stayed with me. _

Embry's hands cup my cheeks and he's smiling again, "How did I ever get so lucky?" Unable to respond I smile though my tears of happiness as he continues, "I love this picture, Lills. Where can we hang it so we can see it every day?"

"How about in the hallway next to the bedroom," I manage to choke out.

"Sounds perfect, I'll hang it after dinner." Embry's lips brush over mine softly, "I really don't know what I did to deserve you, but I'm so glad I have you in my life, Lills. You are truly an amazing woman."

"You're an amazing man, Embry. Plus beautiful as a wolf too," I wink at him. He chuckles, kissing me once more before starting the car and driving us home for the evening.

-0-

**A/N:** Embry asked us to remind you again: Don't forget to check your tatas with a yearly mammogram! He encourages you to donate to Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Research this month, as well. In fact, if you donate in the month of October, send us a copy of your receipt to stupidleeches [at] gmail [dot] com and we will send you a special outtake from Losing Control (probably later in the month or first of November, we have a special Sam/Emily outtake from L's birthday that should be ready in a few weeks).


	30. Chapter 30 Everything Changing

**Chapter 30 "Everything Changing"**

**Disclaimer:** STILL not SM, damnit. We'd quit our shit-tastic day jobs if we were.  
**  
A/N:** Holy. Crap. Chapter 30. And the title says it all. Get ready!

**Beta note (From the desk of the amazing dailyicandy): **Keep reading…even I was like WTF? O_o

_And I forget whatever it was I was thinking about  
With everything changing how am I to know  
How I'm going to hold on to you when I'm spinning out of control  
With you and I together  
But only one of us in love  
And everybody knows _  
"Everybody Knows" - Ryan Adams

**EPOV**

_"I have to go, Embry. Please, just let me leave," tears are streaming down Lillah's cheeks. She is holding a bag in one hand and her car keys in another._

_"No. You can't leave. I love you, Lillah." My heart is pounding at double time as I finally tell her the truth._

_She jerks her head up to look at me, the tears falling faster now, "Now you tell me?" Shaking her head she turns around, opening the front door, "It doesn't matter, Embry. I have to go, I can't live like this. I can't pretend like there is a chance I could really be with you."_

_"You can really be with me," reaching for her hand, I pull her back to me. Wrapping my arms around her, I hold her to me tightly. "Baby, you can be with me. I only want to be with you."_

_She pushes hard against my chest, "I believe you, Embry. I've always believed you." Turning around she walks out the door, but I can still hear her voice, "But it doesn't matter. I can't be with you when I know you'll imprint on someone else. I won't be able to live through losing you."_

_"LILLAH! NO!" I run through the door, chasing after her, but I'm lost in the rain, I can't see anything. Desperate to find her, I phase, my clothes shredding all around me. I lower my nose to the ground but her scent is gone. I've lost her. All around me is black, empty. The house is gone, Lillah is gone, everything is over._

-0-

I jerk awake and I'm immediately hit with the beautiful aroma that is Lillah. Exhaling, I look around the room, taking stock of where I am and what time it is. Lillah is still sound asleep, curled around me like always. There is a soft grey light peeking around the closed blinds and when I glance at the clock it reads five forty-five. Still fifteen minutes before the alarm goes off.

I wait for my heart to slow down after the dream, _scratch that_, the nightmare. I haven't had one of those since I began sharing Lillah's bed nearly three weeks ago. _This isn't good._

_Hey, fucker, maybe you should just tell her and get it over with._ Ignoring the voice in my head, I turn to watch her sleep. I know I need to tell her. The words are on the tip of my tongue every moment of every day. Even at stupid times, like when she made that pizza last night. I bit into it and even though the roof of my mouth was burned off, my taste buds were enjoying the moment. I closed my eyes to savor the pizza, speaking around the food, "Damn you are amazing, woman! This is why I love-," Lillah's head jerked up and I cut myself off quickly, wracking my brain to fill in with something, anything. "Why I love your cooking." I finished off lamely.

_Why the fuck did you not just tell her then?_ I can't answer the question, other than _something_ keeps holding me back. If I'm honest with myself, it isn't _just_ that the time isn't right. Granted, I don't want to tell Lillah I love her over pizza, but I don't think that is it completely either.

_Is this still that bullshit about you not being good enough for her? Damnit, she is going to start getting pissed at you if you don't man up and get your woman._ I hate that it was thrown in my face twice this week how much I don't deserve her. First with the students on Tuesday, saying she "likes to slum it" then yesterday with our disagreement about my being able to take care of her, financially. What shocked me most each time was Lillah was there, not only comforting me, but telling me why I _am_ good enough for her.

_How long do you think she'll keep fighting for you, all but telling you that you are worthy of her love, until she just gives up?_ Truthfully, I'm shocked she's stayed around this long. As much as I love her, deep down I know she deserves better. I was ready give her an out by breaking up with her on Tuesday, but then she was telling me she'd rather live in a cardboard box if she could have "someone like me". When I stopped by the school that evening it was still in the back of my mind that I needed to end this so she could have an opportunity for a better life. Even with telling her she deserves better than me, better than a sick bastard who can't tell her he loves her but thinks of all the ways he could make love to her, she still pushed back. I again nearly told her everything when she said, "I deserve to be with the man I want to be with. I want to be with you, Embry."

_She tells you she wants to be with you and you don't do anything about it. Fucking classic._ For the first time since we met, I was thankful she fell asleep on me that night. I don't think after the day we had I would have been able to just fool around with her. Hell, I was still worked up the next night. I thought I could handle just making out with her until she declared she wants to keep me around for a while. In that instant my heart and mind were having a war with my body, which was screaming for me to take her, make love to her and make her mine forever. I was literally fighting to hold myself down, not touch her. After I regained control a little, I knew I couldn't trust myself to be with her, so I prepared to take it slow and easy, hoping she would fall asleep again.

_How'd that work for you?_ Not so well. First she had a death grip on my cock. Then as I was trying to pull myself together from that contact, she went down on me, again. That sexy as fuck mouth of hers was wrapped around my cock and as much as I knew I should pull her off, I didn't.

_So the girl goes down on you, tells you she'd live in a cardboard box for you and that she wants to be with you, and yet, you still keep your fucking mouth shut. _I don't need the voice in my head to tell me I've fucked this up. Yet I still find myself trying to talk her out of being with me. Yesterday I was trying to make her understand that I can't take care of her like she is accustomed to. Even if she doesn't make a lot of money, her parents have more money than I'll ever see and can give her anything she wants. I can't do that.

_Are you a fucking moron? She doesn't want 'stuff'. The girl wants to be with you._ As much as I want to believe she does want to be with me, I fear it's only temporary. The truth is, I haven't told her because I'm trying to protect myself for when she realizes she really does deserve better than me, than this life.

_Be honest at least with yourself, do you really think she's going to leave you?_ No, I don't think she'll leave me, at least not voluntarily. I just know I won't be able to live if she wakes up one day and finally realizes I'm not good enough to be with her.  
_  
What has she ever done to make you think she'll leave you?_ She hasn't done anything. I just know. Everyone I love leaves me.

My heart sinks as I'm hit right between the eyes with the truth. I'm not just protecting Lillah by not telling her, I'm trying to protect myself. _If I don't tell her, then maybe she won't really love me, so she'll stick around._ That is convoluted and twisted thinking, but I know it's part of the truth.

Lillah's arms tighten around me in her sleep. I know she is out, but somehow, she still manages to reassure me. Her arms around me are like a soft whisper from her, "I'm still here. I haven't run screaming yet. I'm not going to leave you."

I lean forward, pressing my lips against the top of her head. Even though I know she is asleep, she can't hear me, I'm nervous as I take a chance, softly whispering the words aloud that I'm so afraid to say to her when she is awake, "Lillah, I love you. You are my entire life. Please, don't ever leave me."

The room is silent but I can't go back to sleep now; my mind filled with questions I don't have answers to. Then, without warning, Lillah is pushing against me. I roll over to my back and she follows, her fingers tangling in my hair as she hitches one leg over my hips. She is now open to me, her wet thigh brushing against my dick. One shift of my hips and I could easily push myself up into her. A slight movement and I would be in heaven.

Except at that same moment I realize Lillah is whimpering. She has her lips pressed against my chest but I can just barely make out her words, "Stay. Can't leave. Need you."

"Lillah, baby, wake up," I whisper as I adjust her hips so she is safe from me. My hands move up her sides, trying to wake her up with a gentle touch. When I reach the back of her neck I start kneading her shoulders, trying to relax her. It takes a few minutes but she finally quiets down. Soon after her eyes open and I'm staring into panic stricken grey eyes that send me into a frenzy of my own.

She stifles a whimper and I pull her up to my lips, kissing all over her face to her lips. Keeping my eyes open, I look at her as I speak softly, "What baby? What's wrong? I'm here."

She shakes her head, biting her lip like she's trying not to say anything. I slide my tongue over her lips, paying special attention to the part she has trapped between her teeth until she releases it. Moving my lips over hers, kissing her gently, I try to relax her completely. Slowly I feel the tension leaving her body as she loosens her grip on my hair and sinks against my chest.

"What's going on baby? Bad dream?" She doesn't say anything, but shakes her head in the affirmative. My hands move to her back, massaging her silky skin with my fingers as I speak, "Anything I can do to help?"

"You're helping now," she manages to say, though her voice is rough.

"Want to tell me about it?"

She shakes her head no, and as much as I want to push her, to find out what her dream was about, I drop it. I scan my brain to find some other topic so we can change the subject. Remembering grocery shopping with her yesterday I frown, recalling one of her comments.

"Lills, I think I need to destroy your scale."

Lillah's head jerks up, but there is finally a small smile on her face, "What? Why?"

"Because you let that thing control you. You said yesterday you've gained five pounds since we met," I frown, hating that still she worries about her weight.

Lillah sits up slightly but won't look me in the eye, "I just need to be better about running in the mornings. The past couple of weeks have been crazy and I've gotten out of my routine."

"Lills, baby," cupping her cheeks I force her to look at me, "you don't need to lose weight. You are absolutely perfect just like you are."

"I've already gained five pounds, Embry. What happens if I gain ten pounds?"

I shrug, unsure what the problem is, "Then you gain ten pounds. Your body probably needs it. You were eating like a bird before."

"I don't eat like a bird; I just eat healthy. Besides, you won't want to be with me when I'm fat," she whispers, her eyes darting away from mine.

"Says who? When have I ever made you think that? As long as you are healthy, I don't care how much you weigh." I whisper out my next few words, "I will _always_ want to be with you, Lills."

Lillah doesn't quite smile, but she is back looking at me, "You sure?"

"Absolutely. Besides, I couldn't even tell you've gained five pounds. You still feel light as a feather in my arms and," glancing down at her naked body, I grin, "I don't see the five pounds anywhere on your body."

Lillah laughs softly, "You haven't been paying attention then. Haven't you noticed how tight my skirts have gotten?"

"I noticed your ass looking fantastic in a skirt the other day. It fit you perfectly." My hands move down her sides to her hips, "I was jealous that skirt got to hug your beautiful body."

"You're just biased," Lillah says, looking away but I can see the color touching her cheeks.

"Damn right I am," I wink at her when she turns back to me, surprised. When she sits up, my thumbs slide over the curve of her stomach, enjoying the feeling of her lush body underneath my hands. I lift myself up while I pull her forward just enough so my lips can move over the skin of her stomach, "I am biased, but your body is perfect. I will never be able to get enough of you."

The alarm starts going off before I can say anything more. Lillah turns it off, smiling back at me, "You always make me feel sexy, Embry." Leaning forward, Lillah brushes her lips against mine, sighing softly before pulling back, "Would you mind if we went for a run this morning?"

"Sure, we can go for a run, if that's what you want to do, but I think you are sexy as hell just like you are right now," I wiggle my eyebrows as I take in all of her beautiful body as she sits above me.

She slides off the bed, "Thank you, but I want to run, I really do enjoy it, it helps clear my mind. Plus, I need it to at least balance out the larger meals I'm cooking now."

"I like balance." Sliding to the edge of the bed, I pull her back to me, kissing her gently, "Balance is good."

-0-

After our run we go our separate ways for the day. Before I leave, I mention she could bring a change of clothes with her tonight, stay at my place instead of coming back to Forks after Paul and Rachel's. She agrees happily before leaving for school.

When I get to the shop, Sam is just walking in. Following him in, I ask if we can talk briefly before we get going and before anyone else shows up. Sam agrees, leading me to his office.

Sam leans against the front of his desk, arms crossed, "What's going on man? You told her yet?"

"No." Looking down at my ring, I twist it as I continue, "Have you ever had one of those dreams, even when Emily was there?"

Sam doesn't say anything right away, just rubs his chin as he starts pacing the small office. Finally he stops in front of me, "I'm guessing this wasn't a sexual dream. What happened?"

I explain about the nightmare from this morning. Sam nods intermittently as I speak then starts pacing once I stop. He doesn't say anything right away, but when he stops he again does so right in front of me. Crossing his arms, he speaks, "Typically I tell Emily everything, it just works out better that way. Of course, sometimes, secrets have to be kept. Like you asking us to keep your imprinting a secret. I've done so, but I would really like to tell Emily."

"I know, I'm sorry to ask you to keep this from Emily, Sam," I look away, hating that I might cause any type of problem with their marriage because of my secrets.

Sam steps back, slowly pacing the office now as he talks, "It's fine, Embry. I understand. The weird thing is, the other night I had a dream. Emily was screaming at me, telling me that Lillah leaving you was my fault. That I have a responsibility to protect you, including making sure you don't screw things up. In my dream she said Lillah left because of all the secrets, because she was afraid you would imprint on someone else."

I'm too dumbfounded to say anything. Sam walks back up to me, and speaks slowly, "I don't know what all of this means, but I'm guessing you are running out of time, Embry. You need to figure out how you are going to tell her and make it happen. If the spirits are sending us these dreams, there is a reason."

I manage to sink into the chair, lowering my head to between my knees, trying to catch my breath. Once my head stops spinning I look up at Sam, "I can't lose her."

"I know. Is there anything I can do to help?" Sam claps his hand on my shoulder.

"Tell me what to say to convince her I love her, I want to spend the rest of my life with her, and oh by the way, I forgot to mention I imprinted. Shit I'm so fucked," I groan, again returning my head to between my knees.

Sam chuckles, "She is definitely going to kick your ass over this one. You might want to have a ring ready for her to help ease the pain."

My head swings up, "Ring?"

"Yes, ring. Have you heard yourself? If you are going to tell her all of that, you might as well just go ahead and propose," Sam laughs, shaking his head. "That is, assuming you want to marry her."

_Marry Lillah?_ My heart leaps in excitement at the thought. "Yeah," I mumble, shocked at the answer, "I do want to marry her." Then my heart starts pounding for a different reason. Looking at the door instead of Sam, I choke out my fear, "Do you really think she wants this life? I can't give her the world, Sam. She deserves so much more than me."

"Didn't I answer this same question just a few weeks ago with you? She's stuck around so far. After how you acted in the beginning and that crazy 'friend' business, she's still here." Sam leans against the desk, taking a deep breath before speaking again, "Have you ever considered you _can_ give her the world?"

"What are you talking about?" A small laugh sneaks out as I look at Sam, "You giving me a raise?"

"No. You don't deserve one, you are late most mornings," Sam grins and I smirk, knowing he's right. Not by much, but most mornings I am running a few minutes late. Sam snaps his fingers in front of my face to get my attention, "That's actually my point. Your world revolves around her now, right?" I shake my head in agreement, still not sure where he's going with this until he continues, "Don't you think the opposite is true? Emily tells me all the time that if everything else was gone, she would be happy as long as she still had the kids and me. I'm just guessing here, but I think you are her world now, Embry."

I sit in stunned silence. I've never thought about it that way. _I'm her world?_ The idea seems foreign to me; I can't quite understand why someone as perfect as Lillah would want that, but it feels right. In my heart I know it's the truth.

"She still deserves better than me." I mumble. I stand again, eye-to-eye with Sam, "Don't worry, I remember that speech. Doesn't mean it's any less true, she deserves so much more than me and this life."

Sam shakes his head, "They all do, that is what makes them such amazing women."

I start pacing the room myself, considering everything Sam has just told me. I feel like he's right, I'm running out of time. I need to tell her, soon. There is so much going on leading up to Paul and Rachel's wedding, plus Lillah's birthday, I just don't think any of those would be the right time. Her birthday would have been perfect, but if she actually loves me and doesn't leave, there is no way I'd let her out of the bed for the wedding the next day.

I find myself mumbling aloud, "Plus, Rachel would be pissed if I stole her thunder on her wedding day by telling Lillah."

"You are right there. But I don't think you can wait much past the wedding, Embry," Sam says as I cross in front of him.

I stop, smiling sarcastically, "Are you just saying this because you bet three weeks? That would be any time after the wedding."

"No, Embry. I'm saying this as your friend." Sam shakes his head, "I don't know if you have the luxury of more time after Paul and Rachel's wedding. You know women have strange reactions to weddings."

Nodding my head in agreement I start pacing again. My heart is pounding, knowing I'm running out of time; add on what Sam said about a ring and I'm close to freaking out again. I want it to be perfect when I tell Lillah, but I know I need to tell her soon. _What the hell do I do?_

Sam chuckles from the door to the office, "My recommendation would be to go shopping for a ring as soon as you can and have it with you at all times. You may not get the perfect moment, but you need to be ready when that moment happens. Good luck man."

Sam leaves me alone to think. I sink back into the chair, running the conversation back over in my head. One thing is certain, I've lost every bit of control I thought I had. Lillah has won, but instead of feeling upset, I'm excited. I realize I'm ready to tell her; I'm ready to start our life together. Now I just have to get a ring and the courage to tell her all of this. No problem. _You idiot._

-0-

Paul swings the door open wide, pulling me into the house by my elbow, "Get in here, save me from these two."

Chuckling, I let him lead me into the house, "What's going on?"

"They are talking wedding. All I can hear is us spending more money and more stuff for all of us guys to set up the day of the wedding," Paul grumbles, but I can see a small smile on his face.

Stopping in the living room, I'm surprised to find it empty, "Where are they?"

"Kitchen," Paul points over his shoulder. "You go say 'Hi' to your woman, I'm going to tape up more boxes. You have a lot of shit in there man."

Flipping Paul off, I turn to the kitchen, excited to see Lillah again, especially after my talk with Sam this morning. As I'm approaching I can hear the end of Rachel's sentence, "...have so much fun watching the kids. Definitely made Paul want one. Soon. That Eli is amazing."

"He really is," I can hear Lillah sigh softly. "If I could be guaranteed I'd have a baby half as great as Eli I'd have a dozen of them."

I'm unable to move. Lillah and I have never talked about kids. I just assumed she'd only want one or two. _A dozen?_

"Don't say that too loudly. Paul asks me every day how much longer until we can start trying. You tell Embry that and he'll have you knocked up tomorrow," I can hear Rachel laughing, but it doesn't sound normal for her. Of course, she isn't completely wrong. I've been haunted by the images of a family with Lillah since that first day we met, but now it really does feel like more of dream. _Lillah pregnant with my baby._ Seems like an impossible dream, but I'm hopeful.

I can hear Lillah laugh but I know immediately that isn't her sound of happiness; that is her uncomfortable laugh, "Rachel, that isn't going to happen."

Not waiting for Rachel to respond, I turn the corner into the kitchen. Lillah doesn't see me at first but her head suddenly jerks up and she turns slowly to me. Smiling, she moves to me, wrapping her arms around my waist, sighing as she rests her chin against my chest. This is something new she has started recently, instead of going up on her toes, she rests her chin on my chest until I lean down to her. I'm always happy to accommodate her wish.

"Hi, Girlfriend," I whisper against her lips.

"Hi, Wolf Charming, I've missed you," Lillah smiling up at me is a beautiful sight.

Rachel scoffs, "I'm going to be sick. Get a room you two."

Ignoring Rachel I press my lips more firmly against Lillah's, my fingers tangling in her hair to hold her closer to me. Her hands slide up my back to my hair, pulling my head still lower to hers. I want nothing more than to pick her up and set her on the counter, but I know I can't. Slowly pulling back I try to calm both of us down. I can hear her breathing a little harder than normal, which makes me smile even more.

Sliding my hand over her pink cheek I grin, "I've missed you too, baby. Did you have a good day?"

"It was ok, but it's much better now," she closes her eyes and rests her head against my chest, right over my heart. "You?"

Kissing the top of her head I whisper, "Same for me."

Looking up I see Rachel rolling her eyes. When she catches me watching her she shrugs then mouths, "Go away."

Smirking at Rachel I speak to Lillah, "I'm going to go help Paul now, baby. You have fun with Selfish over there; she doesn't like sharing you."

"Keep it up and I'll kick you out of the wedding, Embry," Rachel glares at me.

"Oh, like that scares me," I roll my eyes as I take a reluctant step back from Lillah. When I look down she is chewing on her bottom lip. "Lills, what's wrong?"

Lillah steps forward, placing her hands on my shoulders to pull me down so my ear is against her lips as she whispers, "Be nice to Rachel. Please? For me?"

"She started it," Lillah narrows her eyes at me, making me grin, on the inside of course. _She's going to be a great mom._ "Fine, I'm going to help Paul. Let me know when dinner is ready. I'm starving."

Lillah kisses my cheek and smiles, "Soon."

I nod my head at Rachel, figuring it best not to say anything. As I'm approaching my old room I find Paul has empty boxes stacked up in the hallway and is waiting for me, "Took you long enough."

"Rachel threatened to kick me out of the wedding when I called her selfish. What's going on?" Grabbing a box I aim for the closet. There aren't any clothes left but I had moved all of my mom's belongings from her room in here after she passed. I begin moving stuff into boxes as I wait for Paul to respond.

"You hit a nerve; she's been panicking that she's still too selfish to be mom," Paul shrugs as he hands me an empty box then removes the box I just filled.

"But she isn't pregnant yet, right? You guys don't have to start a family right away," I try to put myself in Paul's shoes and I know I wouldn't be able to wait any longer, given how long he has already waited for her.

Paul frowns, "We could wait longer. Honestly, I'd be okay if she didn't want kids."

I'm surprised by this admission from Paul, "Really?"

"It's not the ideal but I want Rachel happy more than I want a house full of our kids. I think she's just freaking out about actually trying. Kim originally told her she and Jared had been trying for a few weeks when he told her she was pregnant, but then Rachel was asking her about it on Saturday and Kim let it slip that she thinks she got pregnant within a few days of stopping the pill."

I stop filling the box I'm working on, turning to look at Paul, "Seriously?"

"Yeah, and Sam told me that Emily only missed two pills when she got pregnant with Eli. He called our swimmers 'egg-seeking missiles'." Paul wiggles his eyebrows, laughing at the joke before sobering up, "I think Rachel liked the idea of trying, but now that 'trying' sounds like it's more of an immediate thing, she's freaking out." Paul pauses, looking up at me grinning, "I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little scared too. Just think, if we actually start trying after the wedding like we plan, this time next year I could be a dad. That is crazy."

"You being a dad to some little thing is scary. Imagine if it's a girl," I turn back to the closet, laughing to myself when I hear Paul growling.

"I'd lock her up until she's thirty, nope forty," shaking my head, I try to hold in my laughter. Paul throws an empty box at my head. When I turn around to punch him, he's laughing, "Don't even lie. You'd do the same thing if you ever had a baby girl."

Seeing that little girl in my head again clearly I shrug, "Maybe."

"Liar," Paul laughs as he removes a few more filled boxes. We manage to empty the closet before Rachel comes in to tell us dinner is ready. We take the full boxes out into the living room then clean up quickly before heading toward the dining room.

Lillah and Rachel are already sitting at the table with food in front of them. Next to each of them is an empty chair with plates filled, overflowing, on the table in front of the chairs. Paul sits at what I guess is his normal spot, which leaves me to sit in the other chair. Instead of sitting right away, I move the chair over closer to Lillah, along with the plate of food. Once that is done, I sit down, grinning at her. Lillah shakes her head but leans against me, whispering low, "You aren't trying to upset Rachel, are you?"

"No, I'm trying to sit close to my girlfriend," I kiss just below her ear, "my beautiful, sexy, amazing girlfriend."

Her cheeks turn a soft pink just before she turns her head, brushing her lips against mine, "Thank you, Boyfriend. Now eat."

"Yes, dear," I wink at Lillah. She grins as I grab my fork, digging into the meatloaf, mashed potatoes and green beans in front of me. Everyone is quiet for a few minutes, other than the grunts of enjoyment coming from Paul. I lean over to Lillah, speaking loud enough for everyone to hear me, "I don't sound like that when I eat, do I?"

"Shut up asshole!" Paul barks out, but is laughing, "I can't help enjoying my woman's food."

I can hear Lillah starting to laugh next to me. I lift my eyebrows at her and she grins wide, "You sometimes sound like that."

"Oh! Finally some dirt on Embry. This is getting good!" Rachel is rubbing her hands and laughing, "Come on Lillah, give us the dirty details. When does Embry make those kinds of sounds?"

"Rachel," I growl out a warning when I can feel Lillah getting embarrassed next to me.

I almost jump when I feel Lillah's hand moving across my thigh but she speaks softly, "It's ok, Embry." She turns to Rachel, but continues moving her hand in slow circles over my thigh, "You have a dirty mind, Rachel." Turning back to me, I can see Lillah is now smiling as she speaks, "You do make some interesting sounds when you eat food I've made. You should have heard yourself eating those steaks the other night."

"Those were damn good steaks," I groan out, rubbing my stomach at the thought of them.

"Uh-huh," Lillah grins then turns back to Rachel, "that's the sound he makes when he really enjoys the food I've made."

"I can't help it, Lills. You are a damn good cook," I wink at her.

"Steaks?" Paul groans, "Rachel only makes me steak when she's trying to butter me up for something."

Rachel gasps, "That's not true! I made you steak last week."

Paul throws his head back he's laughing so hard. When he calms down he turns to Rachel, who is now obviously irritated, "Yeah, and then you told me how much the wedding cake cost."

Rachel cringes, "Oh yeah, forgot about that."

"Yeah, that's what I thought. So Lillah," Paul turns back to us, laughing still, "what were you trying to sell Embry on when you made him steaks?"

"I- I wasn't," Lillah chokes out, her cheeks now bright red. She ducks her head but her eyes dart over to me, "I was trying to make you feel better, after-"

I'm torn between hating myself for making her think she needed to make me feel better that night and loving her for knowing how to make me feel better. My hand cups her warm cheek as I kiss the tip of her nose, "Shhhh, it's ok." Leaning back, I smile at her, "Thank you, it worked."

She smiles softly at me before resting her head on my shoulder; we finish eating as Rachel and Lillah discuss wedding plans. Paul jumps in, cracking jokes about how expensive this whole thing has gotten. Rachel just glares at Paul, asking when we are going to try on tuxes. Paul explains we are all going tomorrow to get fitted. _News to me._

As Rachel and Paul "discuss" wedding plans, I can just barely hear Lillah speaking, "How much more do you have to pack up?"

"Not much, closet is done, just have a couple of things around the room and then take apart the bed," I kiss the top of her head, smiling, "I should be done soon."

Lillah tilts her head back, looking up at me, "Need any help?"

Glancing over at Paul, who shrugs, I smile at her, "Sure, I'd love your help. Paul, you want to just move those boxes out to the shed? I know I need to clean that out too, but I don't really have anywhere to store the stuff right now."

Lillah speaks before Paul can say anything, "Why don't you just pack everything up, including the stuff in the shed, and store it in my garage? There's plenty of empty space there."

The room goes quiet and all I can hear is my heart pounding in my chest. I love the idea, of course, but I'm shocked that Lillah would even offer. I definitely would not have asked her, but her bringing it up is completely unexpected. Even though we are practically living together now, I've tried not to leave too many personal items of mine at her place. There are the t-shirts she has confiscated, mostly because she looks so damn sexy in my clothes, and a few sweatpants for running or just relaxing with her, but otherwise, everything else has stayed at my place. This feels like a huge step, but I know I'm more than ready to take it.

"That would be great, if you don't mind?"

Lillah's face breaks out into one of the biggest smiles I've ever seen on her, "I wouldn't offer if I didn't want you to, but you should know, there is a pretty hefty fee to store your stuff in my garage."

I'm taken aback, not expecting her to want money, "Really?"

"Yep." Lillah places her lips against my ear, whispering so low I can barely hear her, "The fee is I have to fall asleep and wake up in your arms every day."

Relief pours over me as I relax, turning my head to capture her lips. We kiss for what feels like the briefest of seconds before Rachel is bitching and Paul is cat-calling. Pulling back gently I smile at her, "I will happily pay that fee."

"Good, then it's decided," Lillah grins.

We offer to help Rachel clean but she tells Lillah and I to go finish up the room. I help Paul to take a load of boxes out to the truck, grabbing my tool box while I'm out there. We cover the boxes with my tarp to prevent them from getting soaked by the ever present rain. Paul follows me back to the bedroom, but instead of walking into the tiny room, he grabs as many empty boxes as he can, offering to attack the shed for me. Giving him my thanks, I walk into the room, smiling when I see Lillah standing in the middle of my childhood bedroom.

She turns around and practically leaps into my arms. Her eager lips attack mine as her fingers tug on my hair. Spinning us around, I lower us to my old bed, Lillah straddling me when I sit down. My hands find their way under her sweater, sliding over her smooth skin. She leans back, smiling brightly, "Embry, what would your mother say?"

Glancing over at the picture on the bedside table I smile, remembering my mom, "She would tell me it's about damn time I found someone like you."

"Really?" Lillah blushes, also looking over at the picture, "Do you think she would have liked me?"

"I _know_ she would have liked you. You are pretty hard to resist," I grin against the side of her neck, nipping at her skin lightly.

I can hear her laughing softly, "Why did you even try to resist me in the first place?"

"Because you are way out of my league," I admit. I know this isn't what Lillah wants to hear, but it's the truth.

She pulls my head back, frowning when our eyes meet, "Embry, baby, you have to move past this. I can't change who my parents are, or what they do. I love my parents, but I'm not like them. I don't want to live their life. I want to live _my_ life. I decide what league I'm in and I've decided I'm completely in your league."

Closing my eyes I sigh, "I know I need to move past it, I'm trying."

I feel her lips move all over my face, kissing softly. She stops at my lips, speaking low, "I feel beautiful because of you, Embry. Just stop listening to everyone else and listen to me. I'm with the man I want to be with; leagues, class, money, wealth, power, all be damned. All I want is you, Embry."

"You two aren't having sex in there, are you? You know Rachel will kick your ass."

Paul shouting from the hallway breaks the moment and Lillah and I start laughing. I call out, "We aren't having sex."

"Well hurry the hell up then; or you are going to see Rachel and I having sex soon," Paul grins as he peeks his head in the room. "I'm serious, got to practice making a baby. Practice makes perfect!"

Lillah smiles as she stands up, but I grab her hand, pulling her back to stand between my legs. My hand pulls her head down to my lips, kissing her softly before pulling back, "I hear you. I'm trying." Taking a deep breath I echo her words, wishing I could tell her everything right now, "All I care about want is you, Lillah."

"Good, then you are completely within my league," Lillah smiles before reaching for the picture of my mom and I. "Do you mind if we don't pack this up?"

"That's fine. What are you going to do with it?" Standing up from the bed, I grab a couple of empty boxes from the hallway to finish packing up the room.

Lillah is looking down at the picture when I walk back into the room, "I'm going to display it somewhere. Embry, when was this picture taken?"

"I don't know, I think I was fifteen or sixteen. Why?"

"Had you already started phasing when this was taken?" Lillah looks up at me. There is something odd in her eyes, which doesn't worry me, but makes me curious what she is thinking.

Looking down at the picture, I'm surprised by how young I look, "No, not yet. Though it was soon after this picture was taken."

Lillah looks back at the picture, "I think your mom knew something was about to happen."

"What?" Looking at the picture again, I have no idea where Lillah would get that from, "Why do you say that?"

"Look how she is holding you. You are relaxed, but she has her arms circled around you, and her hands are locked together. Had anyone else phased yet?" Lillah looks up at me again, that same odd look in her eyes.

"Yeah, Sam, Paul, and Jared started phasing before I did," I can't take my eyes off the picture, trying to see what she is seeing. "Lillah, baby, I really don't think she knew I was about to phase."

Lillah shakes her head, looking up at me, "I don't think she knew what exactly was about to happen, but she knew she was losing you soon. The way she's holding you Embry, it's like she doesn't want to let you go, but she knows she's going to have to, soon."

"Huh." I take the picture out of Lillah's hands, placing it on the bed before wrapping her in my arms. I tuck her under my chin before I speak again, "I never noticed that, but I understand. If I thought it would help, I would lock my arms around you all the time."

Lillah's arms circle my waist, "Don't worry, Embry. I'm not going anywhere any time soon. I like being in your arms way too much."

"I like having you in my arms." Loosening my grip on her, I step back slowly, smiling, "But right now I guess we should finish this up. Do you want to pack up the rest of the stuff in here while I take apart the bed?"

"Sure."

Paul comes back a short time later, announcing the shed is done. He grabs a few boxes as I set the mattress and box springs against the wall.

"You going to take that too?" Paul asks, tilting his head toward the bed.

"I don't know, I don't really need a twin size bed," I shrug. Honestly, I'd love to keep it, have my kids sleep in it. Realistically, I don't yet know if Lillah would even want to marry me, let alone make a family together.

Paul shrugs, glancing over at Lillah, "It's your bed man, might as well take it. Besides," Paul winks at Lillah and I know I'm in trouble, "you never know when you might need kids furniture in the future."

I see Lillah's cheeks turn bright pink but I don't respond to Paul's comment. I grab the mattress, smiling apologetically at Lillah before following Paul out to the truck. As soon as we have the mattress in the truck I lay into him, "Did you really have to say that in front of her?"

"Oh like you weren't thinking it."

"That doesn't matter. Even if I was thinking it, she doesn't know that. She doesn't know what is going on. I don't need you scaring her off," I slam the tailgate of the truck closed a little too hard in my frustration.

"Then why don't you fucking man up and tell her?"

Stepping back from the truck I turn to Paul, "I'm working on it."

"Seriously? You're finally going to tell her? When? Because I'd really like to tell Rachel. I hate keeping this a secret from her."

"I know. I'm going to tell her, soon." Shaking my head I tell him about my conversation with Sam today, leaving out the parts about our dreams.

"Are you really going to get her a ring?"

Smiling, I nod, "Yeah, I think I am. You don't think it's too soon, do you?"

"Hell no! You two are practically living together, might as well make her yours officially," Paul grins as we walk back into the house.

"Yeah, that was my thought too."

-0-

Once everything is secured in the truck, I manage to finally drag Lillah away after Rachel makes her promise to come over tomorrow for a run on the beach. Lillah gets settled in the truck and I quickly get in after her, smiling when she snuggles up against me.

"Do you mind dropping me off here in the morning? Rachel can take me home," she mumbles against my chest.

I twist my fingers in her hair as I drive along, "I don't mind dropping you off, but you can just drive the truck if you want. I can run to work and ride with one of the guys to go get our tuxes. That way you can sleep in if you want."

"Really?" Lillah smiles up at me.

Stopping the truck in front of my place I grin down at her, "Yes, really." I slide out of the truck, scooping her up before she can say anything. She giggles against my chest as I grab her bag and purse before carrying her into my place. Setting her down as I close the door behind me and set her bags down, I grin like a fool at her, "What?"

"Nothing," Lillah kisses my chin as she wraps her arms around my waist, "you just make me very happy."

"That's good, you make me very happy," tightening my arms around her, I pull her closer to me, brushing my lips over hers.

Lillah giggles, blushing softly as she speaks, "I can tell."

"Lills. You dirty girl." I wink at her, "You aren't even drunk. What's your excuse for saying that?"

She shakes her head, stepping out of my arms but taking my hand, pulling me toward the bedroom, "No excuse. I am all alone with my very sexy boyfriend. I plan on making you even happier before we fall asleep."

I can't contain my growl at her words, "Is that so? Just what do you have in mind?"

"First," Lillah pulls her sweater over her head, her nipples visible through her sheer blue bra. "I'm going to take off all your clothes."

I stop in the middle of the room, surprised by her words. "Why are you taking off all of my clothes?"

She lifts my shirt, kissing over the skin of my chest as she exposes more and more. Once she reaches my collar bone, she tugs the shirt over my head and tosses it behind her. Her hands slide over my chest as her teeth close around one of my nipples. Unable to control myself, I pull her mouth to mine. For the first time, I feel Lillah's tongue pressing against my lips, begging for entrance. In surprise, I open my mouth, enjoying this new side of her. As her tongue slides along mine I feel her fingers move down my chest. She makes quick work of my jeans and before I can say anything, she is pushing my pants down over my hips. As much as I know I should, I'm unable to stop her when she is so focused. Instead, when she breaks our kiss to remove my clothes, I lift my feet when she pulls my shoes and jeans off.

Lillah, now kneeling on the floor, leans back to smile up at me, her eyes traveling over my naked body. When her eyes meet mine I manage to choke out, "Ok, you have me naked. Now what?"

She stands, kissing me briefly as she pushes me back until my legs hit the bed. I sit down, pulling her to stand between my legs. As our lips meet again, I reach behind her to unhook her bra. Her lips don't leave mine as I pull the bra off her shoulders. My fingers easily find her nipples, twisting and tugging, loving the moans and gasps coming from her mouth.

She pulls away from me, her breathing heavy but she is smiling wide at me, "You are not allowed to distract me tonight; I have a plan." Just her words and tone of voice has my dick twitching.

When she turns around, I can see her reflection in the mirror above the dresser. I can see her lick her lips but then her hand moving around to the back of her skirt catches my eye. I watch as her fingers slowly slide the zipper down. A few twists of her hips and the skirt is sliding down to the floor. I watch her slowly step out of the skirt, leaving her fuck me heels on as she turns around. That's when I realize she is completely naked.

"Lillah," I speak between clenched teeth, trying my best to stay calm, "where are your panties?" She looks down at her body then steps forward, smiling, "I guess I forgot to put any on this morning."

Closing my eyes, I let the weight of her words hit me. _She hasn't had any panties on. All day. At school. At Rachel's. In my old bedroom._ I'm barely able to speak, feeling like I'm grunting instead, "Why didn't you wear panties today?"

"Because I knew I was coming over here tonight, and all day I've been thinking about you," my eyes snap open as I realize she is approaching me. She's licking her lips, her eyes roaming over my body as she steps closer.

"Lills," I groan. My jaw clenched tight I whisper, "Baby, you can't go without panties all day. Especially at school."

"Embry, hush. I'm a big girl, I can go without panties if I want to. My skirt was long enough, no one would have seen anything. Now," Lillah stops in between my legs, her fingers gripping my hair as she pulls my head up to look at her, "are you going to touch me or what? Because I've been wet all day just thinking about you."

Unable to contain my growl any longer, my hands grip her thighs, pulling her legs apart as I move to kneel on the floor. Her fingers tighten their grip in my hair as I look up at her. Ghosting my fingers over her legs I grin up at her, "How wet?"

"I've been dripping down my thighs all day," she whines, her eyes locked with mine.

Leaning forward I run my tongue up first the inside of one thigh then the other. I can taste her arousal on her skin, evidence of how much she has thought about me today. The caveman in me wants to throw her on the bed and do so many unimaginable things to her. My lips and teeth join in on the action, nipping and kissing up and down her thighs. She whimpers but I'm having too much fun to stop just yet. My hands grip the back of her thighs to steady her as I look back up at her again, grinning wide, "Is that all?"

Shaking her head; her cheeks darken slightly as she looks down at me again, "My clit- been throbbing all day."

Pressing my lips just above her slit I glance up at her, smiling. She now has her bottom lip caught in between her teeth as she watches me closely. Dipping my head just a little lower I flick my tongue out, easily pressing it against her clit. I can feel her entire body shake as she moans my name while using her hands to press my face closer to her slick pussy.

Happy to answer her request, I move my tongue down her wet lips, lapping up all of her that I can. She is making the most beautiful noises as I finally reach her waiting entrance; unable to wait any longer I move my tongue into her as far as I can. Thrusting my tongue in and out of her I can feel her walls beginning to tighten already. She's so fucking close. Reluctantly pulling my tongue from her heaven, I slide it back to her clit, focusing my energy on her release. I can hear her whimpering, begging for more, but I want to give her this.

Suddenly, I feel her using my hair to pull me back. Looking up at her questioningly I watch as she pulls herself together enough to make a demand, "Need more, Em. In me."

Understanding her request I grin up at her as I move one hand up her thigh until my middle finger is circling her entrance slowly, "This what you want baby?"

She grins and sighs, then gasps out my name as I slide my finger in as deep as I dare. I massage her walls as I feel her hands pushing my head back towards her clit. This time I use my lips to suck at her, nipping at her nub with my teeth before massaging it again with my tongue. Her entire body is shaking uncontrollably and I know she isn't far now, but I hear her gasp out, "More."

Happily giving in to her, I slide a second finger into her. The combination is finally too much for her. As my fingers thrust up one more time I feel her entire body tense and then she is gone. I can't take my eyes off of her as I watch her body flush, her head thrown back as she holds on to me for dear life. I make every effort possible to lick every bit of her orgasm as it comes in waves.

I mean to help her onto the bed but her body sinks to the floor. I pull her against me, rocking her back and forth until I feel her heart rate start to slow down. Standing up, I finally manage to get her on the bed, pulling her shoes off. When I move to lay down next to her she smiles at me, "We aren't done yet."

"You rest, my dick can wait," laughing to myself I realize just how long my dick has been waiting. Ever since she came into my life, my dick has been waiting for the rest of me to catch up with what it knew all along. _She's mine._

-0-

The next afternoon Sam and I are headed over to the tux shop. Sam hasn't said anything since we got in the car, which I appreciate. It's nice not to have to answer probing questions for a little while.

"You better enjoy the quiet now," Sam grins over at me.

"Why?"

"Your perfect little world with Lillah is about to be invaded by two little kids," Sam smirks. "You are so not ready for this."

"Is that why you guys are going away?"

Sam grins, "That and it's our wedding anniversary, five years. I'm excited to get away with just Emily, but I'm glutton for punishment."

"Why do you say that?"

Sam stops in front of the tux shop, grinning as he gets out, "I've been trying to convince her we need another baby."

"Already? You are crazy," I laugh as I follow him in to the shop.

"Man, you don't understand, wait until you see Lillah pregnant. It changes your life."

"He's right," Jared grins as we approach the group. "Even though Kim isn't showing yet, the difference in her body is amazing. It's like falling in love with her all over again." _We really are a bunch of pussies._

The shop lady approaches before I can respond. Her eyes go wide as she sees all of us. Sam, Jared, and Paul have had tuxes before, so she just has to double check their measurements, but Jacob and I have to be measured. She takes Jacob back first, which leaves Sam, Jared, Paul and I waiting out front. As we wait, Sam asks if I've picked up that ring yet.

"No, not yet. I was going to see about skipping patrols one day next week. I need to find her a birthday present too."

Jared looks surprised, "You're going to propose? Since when?"

"Since he realized we've been right all along and he just needs to fucking _accept_ her already," Paul grins.

Sam warns Paul to be quiet, since there are other people in the shop this afternoon. Paul shrugs but continues, "You know what sucks. We are going to have to rent tuxes again very soon if she says yes."

"Like I'd want your ass in my wedding," I grumble, but I can't help the smile that escapes as I actually consider marrying Lillah. _My wedding._

Paul rolls his eyes, "You smile now, wait until you figure out how much all this shit actually costs."

"I don't care, I'll give Lillah whatever she wants for a wedding," I smile at Paul as Sam elbows him again in warning.

"With what money?"

I shrug, "I put the money you and Rachel gave me for the house aside. I was actually going to give it back to you," Paul snarls at this statement but I throw my hands up in warning, "I was going to, but I think using it for Lillah to have a dream wedding and honeymoon works too."

Jacob walks back out, motioning that it's my turn for measurements. I hear Paul grumble behind me, "You ever think about giving me that money back and I'll tear you apart."

I smirk as I walk back to the small room, knowing Paul is going to be pissed when he sees their wedding present from me.

The measurements don't take long and we are putting our deposits down in short order. The tuxes will be available for us to pick up on Friday. According to the shop clerk, normally she could have them ready for us the next day, but because of our "sizes" she has to have them specially delivered from California. _Good to know._

Jared stops me before I reach Sam's Suburban. Sam is standing beside him as he speaks to me, "We were talking, if you want, we were thinking about getting Kim and Emily jewelry. We could help you pick out a ring."

I'm suddenly nervous realizing this is going to happen. I can't say much but shake my head once before I climb into Sam's vehicle. Our trip back is again quiet. He drops me off at my place but before I can get out he coughs. I look over my shoulder to find him smirking at me, "You might want to relax, Lillah will know something is up if she sees you looking this panicked."

"I'm not panicked. I want this, it's just becoming real."

"It's been real all along, you are just now catching up." Sam gives me a sympathetic smile, "Listen, every day I wake up shocked that Emily is really there next to me. Just stop fighting it and enjoy having her there."

"Yeah, thanks man." Remembering that the kids are staying the night I turn back to him, "Are the kids going to freak seeing me in boxers and a t-shirt?"

"Nah, Eli goes to bed pretty early and Claire knows to stay in her room unless she has a nightmare. Just promise me you'll keep your hands off Lillah. I'm not in the mood to explain to Claire why Uncle Bry's pants are so tight. And no sex. Or fooling around. Just keep it clean."

Shaking my head, I wave him off, promising to behave. I grab some food from my place before shedding my clothes to patrol. I don't make it very long before Jacob is telling me to go home. I run back to my place, showering quickly and grabbing a change of clothes for tomorrow. I packed an overnight bag in my truck but I'm not sure when Emily and Sam will be back, so I want to make sure I don't have to leave Lillah alone with the kids at any point.

Phasing quickly I run toward Forks, focused on Lillah. I can tell I'm irritating Jacob with my thoughts about rings and weddings, but I can't bring myself to care. I walk in through the back door, surprised at how quiet the house is. Checking the clock in the living room I can see it's after five. The kids have been here for a while, so where are they?

Finally I hear music and a faint squeal from the bedroom. Following the sound I walk in to find Claire curled up on Lillah's bed humming along to some cartoon looking show, "Hey Claire Bear."

Claire moves to the edge off the bed to hug me, "Uncle Bry! You're early. Miss Lillah said you wouldn't be home until after she finished giving Eli a bath."

"Uncle Jacob told me to stop patrolling. I think I was annoying him," I wink conspiratorially at her.

She giggles, "My Quily likes to annoy Uncle Jacob too."

"Mind if I go say hi to Miss Lillah? Then I need your help," smiling when she nods, I turn to the bathroom. I'm almost knocked over when I walk in to find Lillah sitting on the floor next to the tub, her hair pulled back in a messy knot, her cheeks red and her shirt soaked. I'm relieved when I hear her laughing along with Eli, who is splashing all over the place, despite sitting in less than two inches of water.

Kneeling next to her I watch Eli for a moment before turning to kiss her, "Hi, baby."

"Hi, handsome," she returns my kiss happily. "How was your day."

"It was good. How's it going with the kids?"

"Fine. Claire is an angel, but little man here enjoyed his carrots a little too much. He wanted to play with the spoon more than he wanted to eat. He was orange head to toe."

I grin, peeking around to find Lillah's shirt covered in orange goo, "Which explains the bath. I'm going to have Claire help me unload the truck, if you want to bring him out once he's cleaned up, I can watch him while you shower."

Lillah's arms circle my neck, "You are a saint! I don't know how Emily handles both of them."

"You seem to be doing ok so far," kissing her again I smile wide, "plus, you look pretty adorable covered in carrots."

"Hush, Embry," Lillah blushes as I stand up.

I kiss the top of her head as Eli splashes more water around. He blinks his eyes rapidly when water droplets get in them. "I'm serious, Lillah. You look adorable right now." Placing my lips against her ear I whisper, "I'm pretty sure you were made to do this."

I kiss her cheek but don't wait to hear her response, turning back to the bedroom and Claire. When I reach to help Claire off the bed I see Lillah has placed the picture of my mom and I on the bedside table on "my" side of the bed. Seeing that picture here in her room gives me a thrill I never would have expected. I'm starting to feel like storing my stuff here is an even bigger deal than I originally thought. Between the picture of me in my wolf form and this picture, it feels like this is becoming "our" home, not just her house. Suddenly very excited to empty the truck I grab Claire's hand, leading her out to the garage. Opening the garage door I find the truck already backed up and waiting for me. I shake my head, laughing, "Damn she's good."

"Who's good, Uncle Bry?" Claire asks as she climbs onto the back of the tailgate.

"Miss Lillah," I wink at Claire, "she parked this truck here just for me. So, you ready to help?"

"Yep!"

"Ok, I need you to push the boxes to the tailgate for me. Think you can handle that?" I grin, knowing most of the boxes aren't very heavy.

Claire nods enthusiastically, "Yep! I'm strong, Uncle Bry!"

"I know you are, Claire," I grab the mattress and box springs from the truck first, setting those against the wall. There is no way I will need the bed any time soon, so might as well put it at the back for now.

"Miss Lillah is pretty," Claire says suddenly as she pushes a few boxes to the edge. I grab them before they fall over.

"She is, Claire. Not as pretty as you though."

Claire giggles when I wink playfully at her, "You should marry her."

I nearly stumble over my own feet as I set the boxes down on the garage floor, "I thought I was going to marry you?"

"Noo, Bry, you're too old for me. 'Sides, I'm gonna marry Quily," Claire again pushes the boxes a little too close to the edge, but I easily catch them.

I chuckle under my breath as I set the boxes on the floor, muttering, "Yeah, it's all a joke to you now but you just wait."

"Miss Lillah's nice," Claire announces as I grab the headboard for the bed. She's obviously not going to allow me to distract her.

I smirk at her as I turn back to the truck, "She is, very nice."

"I like her," Claire has now abandoned moving boxes, too wrapped up in our conversation to focus on working.

I reach for four boxes, easily moving them to the floor before I respond to her, "Me too."

"You should kiss her. I think she'd like that," she states knowingly.

"Um," I reach up and scratch the back of my neck, unsure how to respond.

Claire swings her legs back and forth over the edge of the tailgate, humming a little as I grab a few more boxes before continuing, "So, you gonna marry her?"

I can't hold back the laughter that erupts as I turn back to her, "What makes you think that Lillah would marry me, Bear?"

"Because she loves you," she shrugs as if it's the simplest answer in the world. The matter of fact tone she uses knocks me on my ass. I try to cover up my shock by grabbing the last of the boxes from the truck.

"She does, does she? How would you know?"

"Cause she looks at you the way Aunt Emily looks at Uncle Sam. It's gross."

I'm doing my best not to laugh, but this is a very difficult feat, "It's gross? I'm not sure that I want Lillah looking at me like that if it's 'gross'."

"She's all googly eyed when she looks at you. She smiles and giggles all the time," I'm surprised Claire has noticed all this.

"Googly eyed, huh?"

Before Claire can say anything else I shush her, hearing the door to the kitchen open wide. Claire giggles as I watch Lillah step out into the garage, carrying Eli on her hip. She hands him over to me, along with his bouncy chair before kissing my cheek, thanking me again for keeping them occupied.

When the door closes behind Lillah, Claire continues where she left off, "Yep. She talks about you a lot too."

"Hmm," I say as I sit down on the tailgate of the truck next to Claire, bouncing Eli on my knee.

Claire and I sit in silence for a few minutes before she speaks again.

"You gonna marry her or what?" She sounds exasperated now and I have to bite my tongue to keep from laughing.

I blow out a breath of air and look over at the round face that's turned toward me. She's smiling brightly and I can see the gap between two of her bottom teeth. "I hope so."

"Good. I'll be your flower girl," she tells me decidedly. "But my dress has to be _extra_ pretty."

I chuckle and shake my head. _I should have known there was a catch._ I speak to Eli as I help Claire down off the back of the truck, "Just like a woman, only interested in clothes."

Closing up the truck and lowering the garage door, I lead Claire back into the house. When we go into the living room, she sits on the sofa, but turns to me, a concerned look on her face.

"Uncle Bry, when can I stop calling her Miss Lillah?"

Setting Eli in his bouncy chair I turn to look at Claire, surprised by her question, "I don't know. What do you want to call her?"

"Aunt Lillah," she tells me in a 'duh' tone.

The simple admission by this little girl sets my heart to pounding. I check to make sure Lillah isn't near before sitting next to Claire, whispering, "As soon as you see a sparkly ring on Miss Lillah's hand, that's when you can call her Aunt Lillah. Deal?"

"Deal! I hope she's wearing the sparkly ring soon," Claire gushes, hugging me.

"Me too, Claire. Me too."

-0-

**A/N:** Isn't Embry the cutest thing ever? Sigh. Don't flounce us too much for that first part!

Last chapter in October but once again, Embry asked us to remind you: Don't forget to check your tatas with a yearly mammogram! He encourages you to donate to Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Research this month, as well. In fact, if you donate in the month of October, send us a copy of your receipt to stupidleeches [at] gmail [dot] com and we will send you a special outtake from Losing Control (probably later in the month or first of November, we have a special Sam/Emily outtake from L's birthday that should be ready in a few weeks).


	31. Chapter 31 Endless Night

**Chapter 31 "Endless Night"**

**Disclaimer: **If you haven't caught on yet, just a reminder: we aren't SM. All clear now?  
**  
A/N: **Claire and Eli are really the stars of this chapter. Don't worry, while there is lots of cuteness, there are also some pretty major developments for our two stubborn friends. Read on and be prepared to smile like a fool.

_Have you ever wished for an endless night?  
Lassoed the moon and the stars and pulled that rope tight?  
Have you ever held your breath and asked yourself will it ever get better than tonight?  
Tonight_  
"Glitter In The Air" - Pink

**LPOV**

"Come on big guy, we need to get you into the bath," Eli laughs at me from beneath his blanket of carrots. He's covered head to toe and managed to somehow rub it in his hair, as if it were a new type of hair product. I can't stop laughing, and even though I'm covered in orange goo my face feels like it may split from the wide grin spread across it. Having both Claire and Eli here makes me happier than I ever imagined it could. It helps that they are both well behaved children, even with the mess; I'm having too much fun with them to even care.

Claire is sitting at the kitchen table, giggling at Eli's silly antics between bites of her dinner. She is such a sweet little girl; I can't keep myself from randomly hugging her. Claire has been assisting me with Eli's care and I giggle at her mini-mommy act. It's always funny to me when an older 'sibling' plays mommy to a younger one. Claire might not be Sam and Emily's daughter but she is very much a part of their beautiful little family. I don't think they would be the same without her.

"Miss Lillah," she breaks through my thoughts as I place the high chair tray on the table top and lift Eli from the chair.

I turn to look at her as Eli places his hands in my hair and tugs. I'd bet anything that there is now a clump of baby food in it. "Yes sweetie?" I ask her as I bounce him on my hip and he squeals in delight.

"After I finish my dinner may I watch a movie?" Claire asks nicely and I pause to look at her, pretending to give her request deep thought. She is so much like her Aunt Emily.

"I think we can manage that," I finally nod at her and she grins happily. It doesn't take much to make her happy and I can understand that concept, being that way myself.

"I'll pop something into the DVD player and you can watch while I bathe Eli. How does that sound?" Claire nods, finishing her last bite of food and drinking all of her milk before hopping down from her chair to follow me. "Do you want to watch anything in particular?" I ask as we enter the living room and I open the cabinet of movies.

"I'm in the mood for romance," Claire says abruptly and I have to choke back my laughter.

"How about 'The Little Mermaid'?" I inquire after remembering the conversation the other day at the dress shop. Claire grins, skipping behind me carrying the DVD while I carry Eli to the bedroom. I help her up onto the bed then pop the DVD in, skipping the previews and pressing play. I make sure she's settled on the bed and has everything she may need before dealing with the messy little boy in my arms.

My heart flutters when I see the time on the bedside clock; based on his normal schedule, I expect Embry will be here soon. I can't wait to see him and I know the kids will be excited too. It feels like I haven't seen him in days and Claire has asked about him several times already.

I'm so distracted thinking about Embry that I almost set Eli on my bed while I gather his things. Stopping myself just short of putting the little guy on the bed, instead, I grab his bag and take him to the bathroom, placing him on the floor to play. I don't mind him getting things dirty but I'd rather spend time with the kids and Embry instead of cleaning up. Eli looks up at me with a little frown and I talk to him as I dig through his diaper bag.

"You made quite a mess, Mr. Uley. I particularly love your new hair style," I tell him and he starts to jabber at me. "You don't say? I never would have thought carrots would make your locks shiny." I carry on my 'conversation' with Eli, glancing over my shoulder every minute or so to make sure he's ok. His hands are clapping together happily.

"ok, big fella, let's do this." I plug the bathtub before turning the water on. Once I make sure that the water is a safe temperature I sit down on the floor and pick Eli up. "Now, I understand that it's common for boys to pee everywhere, but I'd really appreciate it if we could avoid that situation," I tell him before placing a kiss on his little button nose. Eli throws his head back and laughs, like he knows what I'm talking about. When he does this I can see the little teeth that have started to come in.

I playfully eye him as I pull his shirt over his head. I drop my face to blow a raspberry on his belly and the sound of his true, joyous laughter fills the room. The happy sound makes me smile too and I have to do it again, so he'll react the same way. I peel Eli's pants off and cock my head to the side, "Remember what I said-". I pull the tape securing his diaper on each side and hold my breath. _Success_. I place Eli on my hip as I stand and turn the water off, leaving just a couple of inches in the bottom of the tub.

After placing him in the tub, I throw in a few plastic bath toys that Emily packed and Eli is happy as a clam. He splashes and squeals, soaking my shirt quickly but I don't mind. I wash Eli's little pudgy face and hands before moving on to his body and hair, making quick work of it so he can play. I'm scooting a little boat through the water when I hear someone walk through the door and Claire's little voice speaking. "I bet that's Uncle Embry," I tell Eli in a whisper and he waves his arms through the air in excitement, slinging water everywhere. I laugh at his exuberance because I feel much the same way, knowing Embry's home.

I hear heavy footsteps move into the bedroom and walk across the hard wood floor. I don't want to take my eyes off of Eli, but soon enough there are big feet in my peripheral vision and Embry squatting down next to me. I glance over at him; he is watching Eli play in the tub. Embry has a soft smile on his face and it makes my heart flutter. It feels right, him watching me bathe Eli and I can't help but let my mind drift a little; wondering what it would be like to have a family with Embry, to have a little boy of our own. _I think my ovaries just exploded._

Embry turns to look at me, as if he can hear my thoughts. He kisses me softly and I grin against his lips, happy to have him here.

"Hi, baby," he says and I sigh at the sweet tone of his voice.

"Hi, handsome. How was your day?" I ask, trying not to make it obvious that I'm leaning closer to him, trying to inhale his scent. He smells good, even after a day of hard work, sweat, and being covered in grease. He just smells like a man should and it's sexier than any cologne or aftershave could ever be. We talk a little before Embry offers to take Eli so I can shower. I agree happily, explaining I'll bring him out to the garage after I'm finished.

He gives me one last kiss on the top of my head after he stands up. Expecting him to leave, I'm surprised when I feel his lips against my ear. I'm even more surprised by what he whispers to me, "I'm pretty sure you were made to do this."

_What?_ My heart clenches and I'm unable to look up. Hearing him walk out with Claire I take the opportunity to try to deal with the bomb he just dropped on my heart. As much as I've dreamed about having a family, being a mom, that dream was all but crushed by Carter. Embry and I have never talked about whether or not he wants kids. Like an idiot, I once again assumed the worst of him and guessed he would be just like Carter, not wanting a family.

Trying to calm myself down I start talking softly to Eli as I lift him from the tub, wrapping him in a towel. "Help me out her, Eli. I need you to translate guy code for me. What did that mean?"

This time, Eli doesn't giggle, but he does blow a few bubbles as his little hand reaches for my cheek.

"Baby, that is not an answer," I sigh. My heart can't handle looking too deeply into his words and it turning out not to be what I'm hoping for. I'm barely holding myself together as it is. Things are so perfect with Embry right now that I find myself worrying something is about to happen to destroy it. _Like his imprint finally showing her face._ Clearing my head, I promise myself I will enjoy tonight and not think about all the things that could change our relationship in an instant.

After Eli is all dried off and dressed I place him on the bed, brushing his hair gently with the soft brush Emily packed. Eli is making happy little noises again which makes me start humming my own little tune. Enjoying the simplicity of this moment reminds me this is pretty much the most perfect way to spend an evening.

"Alright, Mr. Eli, you are all set. Let's go find Uncle Embry and Claire. There's no telling what kind of mischief they are getting into," I tell him and he smirks, as if he knows exactly what I mean. When I lift Eli off the bed I make sure that I don't transfer the baby food from my shirt onto his clean clothes. He smells fresh and clean and I bury my face in the side of his neck, kissing his skin as we walk through the house.

As I approach the garage I can hear Claire and Embry chattering away but I can't make out anything they are saying. As soon as I open the door I hear Embry shushing Claire. _What are those two up to? _When I walk through the door Claire is sitting on the bed of the truck, her little feet swinging back and forth over the edge. She gives me a snaggle tooth grin and I wink at her as I hand Eli over to Embry.

"Here's his bouncy chair," I tell Embry as I pull it through the kitchen door. "I won't be long, I just need to wash my hair; Eli gave me a nice Carrot Treatment. He promised it would make it shiny," I giggle and kiss Embry's cheek. He runs his hand down my back, stopping just short of reaching my ass. I shake my head at him and tell him, "Thanks," before walking back into the house. It does funny things to my stomach seeing him talking to Claire and holding Eli. I try to brush that aside, making a stop in the kitchen to place Claire's plate and plastic cup in the sink before making my way to the bathroom.

-0-

Embry is eating dinner, listening intently to Claire tell him all about her favorite Barbie while Eli sits in his high chair playing with the Cheerio's I placed on his tray. I listen in to the conversation, jumping in when needed to explain something to Embry about Barbie's, while gathering the ingredients for homemade chocolate chip cookies. Claire and I are going to bake while Embry hangs out with Eli.

I hear Embry scoot his chair back just before he steps up behind me, helping me to reach a large bowl. "Thank you," I grin at him from over my shoulder. He presses himself up against me, the edge of the counter digging into my hip bones. Embry's face drops down and he kisses the back of my neck, causing me to shiver. He rubs his semi against my ass before pulling away and placing his plate in the sink. I stand in shock for a few seconds before I notice he's lifting Eli from his high chair.

"Come on dude, let's go do 'manly things'," he tells him as they leave the kitchen.

I'm taking deep breaths, trying to control myself when Claire comes dancing over singing "Part of Your World" as she spins in circles. The sounds drifting through the house tonight; Claire singing, Embry laughing and Eli squealing- it makes me happy beyond belief. This is the life I dream of; I truly want to feel like this forever.

Claire and I begin to mix the cookie dough; I do the measuring and Claire stirs while sitting on the counter, just as I use to do as a little girl with my grandmother. I have lined up a couple of cookie sheets on the counter and hand a cookie scooper to Claire, instructing her on how to use it before allowing her to fill her pans. I help her down from her perch and she stands back while I put the cookies in the oven to bake.

"Let's go see what Embry and Eli are up to," I tell her as I set the oven timer.

"Ok, Miss Lillah," she smiles up at me and grabs my hand without a second thought. I beam down at her as she swings our arms back and forth. When Claire and I walk into the living room I'm torn between laughing and melting into a puddle of goo on the floor. Embry has Eli sitting on his lap, facing him. Embry's head is thrown back, his lips slightly puckered in an "O", and he's howling softly. I swear, if the kids weren't here, I would be jumping him right about now.

Claire and I don't say anything, watching curiously as Embry lowers his head and looks down at Eli. Before my brain can process what is happening Eli tilts his tiny head back, mocking Embry's pose, and begins to 'howl' too. It's probably one of the cutest things I've ever seen. Claire giggles and Embry's head jerks around to look at us. He grins proudly and nods toward Eli who is now looking at us too, his little hands clapping wildly. I don't speak because Embry turns back to Eli and without warning, he makes the "wolf call" too. Eli grins at him and while bouncing up and down on Embry's lap, he repeats what he's just heard.

Embry grins back at me as Eli giggles, "He's a smart kid, Lills."

"He's a cute kid," I tell him as I sit on the arm of the couch, Claire moving to the cushion next to Embry.

Eli, noticing he's getting all of the attention drops his head back and 'howls' again, this time getting a little louder. Claire and I laugh and Embry praises him, "Good job! By the time you are ready to phase, you'll be a natural." Embry chuckles and turns to me again, "Sam is going to love this."

"I think Emily may want to kill you for teaching him that; I bet he's going to drive them nuts," I giggle. I'm willing to bet that Eli will howl and wolf call endlessly until the 'new' wears off.

Embry just shrugs at my words, "Sucks for them," he mutters and I give him a look before glancing at Claire. He grins sheepishly and turns back to Eli.

"What does that mean, Uncle Bry?" Claire wants to know and I stifle my giggle.

"Come on, Claire. Let's go check on our cookies," I stand, holding my hand out to her. She seems easily distracted by this and jumps up, running ahead of me. Before I walk away from the couch Embry mouths a silent 'Thank you' and I grin at him before whispering, "You owe me." I hear Embry growl as I walk away and it puts a little more sway in my step. _I do love to tease him_. Knowing he wants me makes me feel sexy and amazing.

Claire and I pull the cookies from the oven and pop another batch in, alternating between the two pans so we can finish the job before her bed time. While the last batch is baking I call Embry into the kitchen. I almost laugh at how quickly he appears, placing Eli in his high chair before I hear him sit down. I don't realize there is someone else with him until I hear Claire squeal from beside me, "QUILY!"

Claire runs across the kitchen so fast I'm afraid she's going to trip, but Quil has her in his arms before that can happen. Embry comes up beside me, explaining softly, "He texted me a little while ago, wanting to know if he could see her before she went to bed."

"It's fine, I understand," I smile up at him, trying to relax him. "Good thing we made a few dozen cookies with you two here. Mind grabbing some cups? Make sure to get Claire a small plastic one."

He pulls me back to him quickly, holding me tight against his chest before whispering, "Best girlfriend ever. Thank you."

Closing my eyes for the briefest of seconds, I enjoy being held by him. More than anything, this is where I'm happiest, in his arms. He kisses my neck before stepping back and I sigh at the loss of contact. While he grabs the cups, I place as many soft, warm cookies on a plate as I can possibly fit without dropping one. Turning around I find three shining faces watching every move I make, and Quil smiling down at Claire watching me. The roll of laughter that comes out of my mouth makes them all grin at me, even Quil.

"Who wants milk with their cookies?" I ask as the giggles fade.

"Me, please!" Claire raises her hand in the air and Eli mimics her, even though he doesn't know why she's doing it.

"Milk and cookies? No wonder you never leave this place, Embry," Quil winks at him before turning to me. "I wouldn't turn down milk, Lillah."

Out of the corner of my eye it looks like Embry is giving Quil a dirty look as I set the cookies down on the table, but when I turn to him he's smiling at me, "Me too, please."

Leaning back I wink at him and when I pass him I run the fingers of one hand through his hair, grinning at myself when he growls playfully. I grab the milk and start serving it in the cups Embry grabbed. Claire is leaning close to Eli in his seat, talking to him happily while Quil and Embry discuss their days.

When I pass Embry to sit down he surprises me by reaching out and slapping me on my butt. I hear Quil cracking up as I spin to look at Embry. Instead of looking embarrassed or even regretful, he just smiles crookedly at me. I shake my head but don't say anything. _What is there to say, anyway?_ Apparently, this upsets Quil, "Come on Cuz, doesn't your temper match your hair? You should go off on him."

Rolling my eyes at Quil I move to sit next to Embry but he pulls me into his lap. When I raise my eyebrows at him in question he says, "You need to be closer to Eli."

Quil snorts and this time I definitely see Embry giving Quil a dirty look. _What is going on? Does Quil know something that Embry doesn't want to tell me?_ I've done my best not to ask too many questions about the pack, knowing that Embry can't tell me everything. However, sometimes, like now, I feel like Embry isn't keeping _pack_ secrets so much as he's keeping secrets from me. _What could the other guys know that I wouldn't know?_ I suddenly realize it could be anything, everything. The guys all have that mind-link thing with Embry, they could know every thought in his mind. I'm suddenly very jealous of that connection. I feel like I've gotten to know Embry really well over the last few weeks, but times like this I know there are still things he can't, or won't, tell me.

"Baby? Do you want a cookie?" Embry offering me a cookie pulls me out of my train of thought. I see Quil grabbing cookies for himself and Claire while Eli holds his little hand out, opening and closing his fist like he's trying to reach them but can't.

"Thanks, Em," smiling at him I take the cookie he's offering then turn to Eli; grabbing the bib, I put it on him before breaking part of a cookie into pieces and placing them on his tray. He looks down then up at me with a gummy grin on his face. I think I really might melt into the floor, he's so cute.

I set the rest of the cookie back on the plate, not needing the extra calories. Embry is mumbling around his mouthful of cookie and I can't help but to smile when I look back at him. He has bits of chocolate on the corners of his mouth that I'm dying to lick off. He winks at me but then points at Claire. I follow his gaze and start to laugh. She's wearing the melting chocolate around her mouth and swinging her legs back and forth, causing her whole body to move. "These are so good, Miss Lillah," Claire says, cookie crumbs flying.

"Dude, if you don't marry Lillah, I'm going to. These cookies are fantastic."

Quil's words stop my heart, but it quickly catches up, pounding at double time. I can't look at Embry but I manage to choke out, "I think you might want to marry Claire, Quil. She's the one that made the cookies. I only assisted her."

"Claire! You made these? No wonder they taste so good!" Quil hugs Claire, not even realizing there is now chocolate all over his t-shirt from her messy face.

The smile on Claire's face is literally from ear-to-ear. She looks so proud, even puffing her chest out a little as she responds, "Miss Lillah and I made the cookies. She's a really good teacher." Suddenly Claire's face falls and I can just barely hear her whisper, "Quil, you can't marry Miss Lillah."

If I didn't know better, I'd almost guess the little girl was getting jealous of me, but Quil quickly reassures her that he only has eyes for her. The connection these two have astounds me. I've never really seen them interact like this, but it's amazing to watch. Even though they joke about getting married, Quil acts like a mixture of a surrogate father-figure and a big brother. He seems proud of her accomplishments, encouraging her, while still teasing and having a good time. When Emily first explained this to me, I didn't understand it. Having seen the other guys with their imprints and now seeing Quil with Claire, I get it. He really is adjusting who he is for her needs. It's bizarre but fascinating to watch.

"Also, legally, you can't marry Lillah, since you two are somehow related," Embry says, but there is an edge to his words. I try to see his expression out of the corner of my eye, but his face looks calm. _Seriously, what is going on?_

Quil shrugs, "I don't care about laws. But I guess I'll let you keep her, Embry. She didn't seem very interested in kissing me."

Without meaning to I wrinkle my nose at the thought of kissing Quil. Of course, Quil sees this, "Hey! I'm not a bad kisser!"

"She has good taste," I can feel Embry laughing behind me.

Ignoring Embry I apologize to Quil, "It's nothing personal Quil, I just can't imagine kissing anyone other than-" I stop myself, realizing how much I just revealed.

The room is silent. Unable to say anything I glance over at Eli, who is happily gumming on a piece of cookie while he holds another piece, chocolate melting all over his hand. I suddenly almost hope he gets chocolate in his hair so I have a chance to escape before I say anything else.

"Lillah," Embry's lips move against my ear softly, "I can't imagine kissing anyone other than you either."

"Really?" I spin to look at him, doing my best to keep the smile off my face at his words.

"Really." Embry smiles, kissing my cheek. I suddenly wish we didn't have an audience.

"Uncle Bry," Claire whispers, loudly.

Embry glances over at her, smiling, "Yes, Claire."

Claire cups her hands around her mouth, I'm guessing so only Embry can hear her, but of course, we all hear her next words, "Kiss her."

My blush is immediate and I look away, but I hear Quil laughing, "That's my girl!"

Before I know what is going on I feel Embry's hands gently cupping my face, turning me toward him. When my eyes meet his, he's smiling happily, which relaxes me slightly. Embry glances down at my lips then back up into my eyes, "Claire says I should kiss you."

"I heard," I grin at him just before I see him lower his head to mine. His kiss is soft, comforting, his lips moving slowly over mine. Since we have an audience I do my best not to push him further, enjoying the simplicity of this kiss. His lips on mine manage to relax me more than any other touch he can give me. I wasn't lying before, I truly can't imagine having any other man kiss me.

Embry pulls back slightly but I hear him mumble against my lips, "I could kiss you forever."

My fingernails gently scratch the stubble that is almost always present on his face, "Same, baby."

"See Uncle Bry, I told you she'd like it," Claire is giggling behind me.

"You are so smart Claire," I can hear Quil praising her, but I can also hear the laughter in his voice. "Too bad he's an idiot."

I raise my eyebrows at Embry and he shakes his head before looking around me and giving Quil another dirty look, "Enough."

"What, I'm just telling the truth. Maybe you should try it out for a change." When I turn around to look at Quil he's popping a whole cookie into his mouth, but he has a evil grin on his face as he chews. I look back at Embry, trying to understand what is going on but he won't look at me. I can tell by his locked jaw is that he's upset but I don't know why. _Is he really keeping secrets from me?_

"Em?" I move my fingers to the back of his neck, playing with the soft hair back there to get his attention.

"These cookies really are great, baby," Embry smirks at me as I watch him pop another one in his mouth.

I can hear Quil behind me muttering "chicken" and I feel the heat rising up my neck as I realize Embry really is keeping things from me. There's something he isn't telling me that Quil knows about. Unable to sit at the table any longer, I stand, returning to the oven to check the last batch of cookies. The heat that wafts out of the oven isn't the only thing making my temperature rise. I take the time to calm myself down, hoping that maybe it's not anything big. _Maybe he just has a surprise for my birthday or something. _I don't want to think the worst of Embry just because Carter lied to me our whole relationship. I know in my heart Embry is different. Resolving again to enjoy this evening, I pull myself together and turn back around.

When I return to the table all the cookies I set out are gone, except the one I broke pieces off of for Eli. Embry opens his arms and against my better judgment I accept his unspoken offer to sit in his lap again. Claire grins at the two of us but points at the last cookie on the plate, "Miss Lillah, don't you want your cookie?"

"Embry can have it, Claire," smiling at her, I pull the plate toward us. Looking back at him I kiss the corner of his mouth, my tongue jumping out to grab the chocolate there. I can feel his arms tightening around me but I pull back, "You can have the cookie."

"Noooo, Miss Lillah, it's your cookie. Everyone has dessert, that is Uncle Sam's rule."

Quil laughs, "She's right, Lillah. Sam makes everyone have dessert, even Emily."

I can feel Embry chuckling against my back, "I like this rule, Claire." Embry rests his head against my shoulder, his lips tickling my ear when he speaks, "You heard the woman, everyone has dessert, Lills."

Narrowing my eyes I glare back at him, "When your legs break from me sitting on you, you won't love that rule so much."

"Miss Lillah!" Claire starts snorting she's laughing so hard, "You can't break Uncle Bry!"

"Thank you, Claire, my point exactly," Embry grins, reaching across the table to high five her.

"Fine. I see I can't win against you two," glancing up at Quil I amend my statement when I see him watching me closely as well, "Fine, I can't win against your three!" I grab the cookie taking a small bite. I mean to savor every bite but before I know it, the cookie is all gone and I'm licking the crumbs off my fingers.

Looking up I see Claire with both of her hands over her mouth, her whole body shaking. Quil's eyes are wide before he turns away from the table, doubling over in laughter. Turning around I find Embry grinning as he shakes his head. "What?" I ask, confused by their reactions.

Embry grins sheepishly then whispers, "Remember last night talking about noises I make when I'm eating? You just made the same noise eating that cookie as you make when you and I are," Embry clears his throat, "enjoying ourselves."

My flush is immediate and I bury my head in Embry's neck, speaking as quietly as possible so no one else can hear, "Oh God! Embry! You should have stopped me." Feeling him shaking I get more irritated at him. Before I can say anything he asks Quil if he'd mind cleaning the kids up.

After I hear Quil take Claire and Eli out of the kitchen I look up into his eyes, pushing my index finger into his chest with every word I speak, "You should have told me! You know sweets are my weakness." Embry doesn't say anything, just lets me keep going. Finally my head drops to his chest and I whine out, "I'm going to be a terrible mother."

Embry holds me close until I calm down. Brushing my hair out of my face he smiles down at me, "Are you done?"

I nod at him but I don't move my head from its resting place on his chest. Embry won't have this, pulling me to sit up as he smiles at me, "Good. Quil thought it was hilarious, so Claire thought it was funny. Don't worry, she isn't scarred for life. I'm sure living with Sam and Emily over the years she's probably seen more than most little girls her age."

"Are you sure?" I twist my hair around my finger, unable to look him in the eye.

Embry's warm lips move to my temple, "I promise." Moving his lips slowly down my nose he kisses me softly. Cupping my head he holds me still, but his lips ease my tension. When he pulls back his eyes are dancing and his smile is brilliant, "Who said you'll be a terrible mother? I think you'll be an amazing mother."

My heart stops beating at his words. I have to remind myself how to breath. _In. Out. Deep breath in. He thinks I'll be an amazing mother? Deep breath out. How do I even respond to that?_

"All done, Uncle Bry," Claire walks back in, followed by Quil holding Eli before I can really pull myself together. Taking shallow breaths I manage to slide off of Embry's lap. I thank Quil for cleaning up the kids, telling him to relax while I clean up and put the cookies away. Setting the cookie sheets in water to soak overnight, I turn to find Embry holding Eli in one arm and the other arm outstretched to me.

"Come on, Claire and Quil are in the living room, let's go kick him out," Embry grins at me and I'm unable to remember why I was even upset with him earlier. One look from him and I melt. I am in _serious_ trouble.

I take his hand, letting him lead me into the living room. Claire is talking to Quil, explaining something with her hands, but stops talking when we walk in. _If I were a paranoid person I would think she was talking about me._

Quil grins up at us as we both take a seat on the couch, Eli sitting in Embry's lap, "Thanks for letting me come over guys, I really appreciate it. My sanity also appreciates it."

"Your sanity? What are you talking about?" I laugh, wondering how coming over tonight could impact that.

Quil smiles as he stands, "We go a little- crazy if we don't see our imprints every day. We start having really weird dreams. Nightmares really."

"Oh." That's all I can manage. In my dreams, I'm Embry's imprint. Sometimes I actually forget about the whole imprinting thing, because when I'm with Embry it feels right. But times like this I'm reminded that it could happen. If Embry were to imprint, I would be pushed aside for his true soul mate. _She'll have to fight me for him._ I'm shocked by this thought, feeling myself blushing just from thinking it. I'm not a violent person, but I would be willing to fight for the man I love.

"Lills, you ok baby?" I look up to see Embry looking at my hands, when I look down I'm shocked to find they are clutched into fists. Exhaling slowly I unclench my hands.

He looks at me and I smile, "Yeah, fine."

"You sure? You looked like you were ready to take a swing at someone," Embry still looks concerned.

Quil laughs, "I knew she had a temper! You better watch out Embry, she might take a swing at you soon."

Claire giggles as she stands up from the floor, hugging Quil, "Quil, you are silly. Miss Lillah wouldn't do that to Uncle Bry."

I don't say anything as I stand up to let Quil out. Turning to Embry I'm surprised to see him still sitting, "You coming?"

"Nah, it's too cold out back for Eli. I'll stay here with him, you girls walk Quil out," he grins at me. My poor heart constricts again hearing him worry about it being too cold for the baby. _He'll be a wonderful father._

Claire grabs my hand, pulling me toward the back porch, "Come on Miss Lillah, we got to walk Quil out."

Quil laughs as he leads the way outside, holding the back door open for Claire and I. He surprises me by hugging me first, whispering, "Good to see you do have a temper. He's worth fighting for, Cuz."

Not knowing how to respond I just shake my head, watching as Quil hugs Claire, promising to visit tomorrow once she gets home. After Quil walks off the back porch, Claire stands at the screen door, waving until neither of us can see Quil anymore. I would almost laugh at the little girl if I hadn't stood at that same screen door multiple times myself watching my wolf walk away. _My wolf. How I wish._

Claire grabs my hand, sighing, "I don't like it when Quil leaves."

"I know sweetie," I sigh with her, "I don't like it when Embry leaves."

When we walk back into the house, I lock the door behind me. Embry is standing in the middle of the living room, holding Eli and looking like a natural. He also looks like he belongs in my living room, holding a baby.

"Are we ready for pajamas?" He winks at me and I can't help but to return his happy smile. I turn off all lights in the living room and kitchen then follow him and the kids into the bedroom.

Embry sets Eli in the center of the bed while he works on setting up the pack-and-play for him to sleep in. Grabbing the bag Emily packed, I pull out Claire's pajamas. Kneeling on the floor next to her, I fold up her clothes as she removes them, all the while keeping an eye on Eli. Claire is once again humming, but this time I think it's "Kiss the Girl".

"Miss Lillah, may I finish watching 'The Little Mermaid'?"

She wiggles her head out of her nightgown, grinning at me which makes me smile even more, "I don't mind, but you should double check with Uncle Embry."

"Uncle Bry," Claire says as she walks around the bed. I move to sit on the bed, pulling Eli to sit in my lap as I watch Claire work her magic on Embry, "Would you mind if I finished 'The Little Mermaid'?"

Embry looks up at me, obviously confused, "What's a little mermaid?"

"It's a Disney movie. Claire was in the mood for romance this afternoon," I wink at him.

Embry shakes his head, laughing, "I don't mind."

Claire skips back over to the bed and crawls up next to Eli and I. I press play on the remote and the movie starts up where Embry stopped it earlier. Claire sings along with each song as it comes on, even using a silly little accent when she sings along with "Kiss the Girl".

I can tell Eli is starting to fall asleep in my arms, so I make quick work of changing his diaper and getting his pajamas on. Once done, I glance up at Embry to find he's still putting the pack-and-play together. I speak low enough so he can hear but Eli won't wake up, "Em, you need help?"

He looks up at me, and I'm surprised to see a look of frustration on his face. I do my best to hold back my laughter at his words, "Is there a trick to this thing? How hard can it be to set this up? I can phase into a wolf but I can't set up a stupid bed?"

Laying Eli down in between two pillows I slide off the bed, reaching my hand out, "Instructions?"

"I don't need instructions," Embry looks offended I would even mention that word.

"_I_ need instructions," brushing my hand over his arm to reassure him, I reach into the case, digging around until I find a piece of paper. Reading through the step-by-step instructions, I explain each step to Embry.

Once the pack-and-play is ready he frowns, "Why do they have to make it so difficult?"

Kissing his cheek I grin, "It has to be safe for the children, Em."

"It can be safe and easy to set up," he grumbles as he covers the bottom of the pack-and-play with one of Eli's blankets while I grab him from the bed.

Setting Eli into the bed and covering him with another blanket I grin up at Embry, "I thought it was pretty easy to set up, once we followed the instructions."

"Oh you're asking for it now!" Embry laughs and I giggle softly, making sure not to wake Eli.

I run for it, jumping on the bed and moving to the opposite side as I speak, "Help me, Claire. Uncle Embry is coming after me!"

"Uncle Embry!" Claire says, using his full name for once, "You be nice to Miss Lillah."

Embry looks shocked, "Claire, you are taking her side?"

Claire glances back at me and giggles before turning back to him, "Of course I am. We're girls, we gotta stick together!"

"Alright then, if you are sticking together," Embry reaches out his long arms toward both of us, "then you get tickled together."

My giggles are automatic as I feel his fingers tickling my side. Add on Claire's giggles and I'm laughing so hard I can't catch my breath. Embry is relentless in his tickles, making me laugh harder at him tickling both of us. Claire and I keep bumping into each other in our attempts to move out of the range of Embry's hands. Gasping for breath I surrender to Embry, "You win!"

"Of course I win. Boys always win," Embry winks at me.

Smirking over at Claire I give her a wink as we both try to catch our breath, "Boys win only when we girls let them, right Claire?"

Her cheeks pink from laughing so hard she nods enthusiastically, "That's right, Miss Lillah."

Embry shakes his head but leans back against the headboard, pulling me to rest against his chest while Claire finishes watching the movie. At one point, Claire turns to me with a very serious look on her face, "Miss Lillah, are mermaids real?"

"I don't know, Claire. I never thought werewolves were real until I met your Uncle Embry," I grin back at him and he squeezes me in return, resting his chin against my shoulder.

Satisfied with my answer, Claire lays back down on the bed, but this time she rests her head in my lap. I play with her hair while the movie finishes up. Once it's over she sits up slowly, yawning, "I'm ready for bed, Miss Lillah. Will you tuck me in?"

"Of course I will, sweetie. Come on, hugs for Uncle Embry," I tell her as I sit up and climb off of the bed. Claire dives at Embry, wrapping her tiny arms around his neck and kissing his cheek loudly. I laugh quietly when Embry places his own arms around Claire's little body, engulfing her. Embry winks at me over her shoulder before releasing Claire. _He is so beautiful, I can't stand it._

Claire crawls over to me and I lift her from the bed, allowing her to climb onto my back. "I'll be back," I tell Embry with a grin and make my way around the foot of the bed. As I walk through the bedroom door I hear Embry mutter, "Damn," and I giggle under my breath.

Claire chatters sleepily while we climb the stairs. "I can't wait to tell Aunt Emily that I baked cookies, Miss Lillah."

I grin at how excited she sounds, even through her sleepy haze. "She'll be really proud, Claire. You did a great job, all of the boys said so," I tell her just as I step onto the upstairs landing.

"I know! Especially my Quily. He liked them best," Claire tells me proudly. Nodding my head in agreement with her assessment, I show Claire where the bathroom is in case she needs it during the night then continue walking.

We step through the door of the room my grandmother made mine when we moved away. Before I can say anything Claire gasps and slides down my back. "Miss Liiiiillah, whose room is this? It's _so_ pretty," Claire exclaims.

"This house belonged to my grandparents. When I would visit them as a little girl, this was my bedroom," I tell her as I pull the comforter, blanket and sheet back. Claire climbs in and sits up, looking around in fascination. I sit on the edge of the bed, just watching her glowing face.

"Miss Lillah, may I come over and spend the night again?" She surprises me by asking, turning to face me, her round face beaming.

"I would love for you to come back over. Any time you wish, you just have your Aunt Emily call me, ok?" My eyes mist up a little and I feel silly for reacting so strongly.

Claire nods her head up and down happily before laying back in the bed, moving around until she's comfortable. I twirl a lock of her hair around one of my fingers before leaning down to kiss her forehead. "There's a nightlight so you can see if you wake up. You just call my name if you need anything, ok?"

"Ok," she grins up at me and her eyes become heavy again. "Good night, Miss Lillah. I love you," her dainty voice tells me softly.

My heart clenches a little at her words and I kiss her cheek, "Love you too, Claire. Sweet dreams," I whisper as I stand and quietly leave the room. I slowly walk back down the hallway, rubbing a hand over my heart. I would be so happy to have a scene much like this every night. Embry waiting on me in our bed, our little girl sound asleep in her bedroom. I don't know if Embry would ever want that, but a family with him would be beyond all my imaginings. I sigh, getting frustrated with where my mind is wandering to. I don't know why I keep thinking about these things so often when I didn't in the past, but I know I need to stop. This kind of thinking just leads to heartache.

Shaking my head clear I make it the rest of the way down the stairs, stopping by the kitchen to grab a bottle of water and to prepare a bottle for Eli, in case he wakes up during the night. I place the bottle in the fridge and carry my water with me to the bedroom. "Hey," Embry whispers when I walk through the doorway.

"Hey, how's he doing?" I ask him quietly. Embry has his hands behind his head, relaxing against the mound of pillows that rest against the headboard.

"Haven't heard a peep out of him since you went upstairs. Claire sleeping?" He asks as I place my bottle of water on the nightstand and pull my pajamas out of my dresser.

"Yeah, out like a light. I don't think I've ever met a kid as well behaved as she is," I tell him.

"She has great people raising her," Embry sits up and moves off of the bed to follow me into the bathroom.

"Embry, what are you doing?" I ask in a normal voice when he closes the door behind himself.

"I'm sorry, I just need one thing," he tells me, moving closer to me. My eyes grow wide as I watch him. He looks like he is stalking me and I back into the vanity. Embry stops in front of me, placing his hands on my hips as he leans down to kiss me softly.

"Thank you," he lifts his head before kissing me a little harder then lifting his head again, "for being so amazing today. You didn't have to do this, Lillah."

I pull back from Embry and shake my head, "Don't thank me for wanting to spend my evening with the man I-," I pause, realizing what I almost said. "The man I'm dating and the children of my friends," I tell him, finding it hard to look him in the eye. "Claire wants to do this again, she says," I grin, trying to distract both Embry and I when I notice he is trying to meet my eyes.

Embry laughs and drops his face down to kiss the top of my head, "She loves you." His voice is a whisper again and it sounds raspy.

"Yeah," I tell him quietly, "she told me so when I tucked her in. She's a wonderful little girl."

Before Embry can say anything else I stand on my tip toes to press my lips to his. He deepens the kiss and presses his hips into mine while my hands drift up into his hair. I know that if we keep allowing this to happen Embry and I could be in some trouble. Emily told me that Sam made Embry promise no 'sexy times' as she called it and I don't want to have to lie to my friends. I giggle at my thoughts and the sound makes Embry lift his face to look at me. He looks at me questioningly and I shake my head in a 'you don't want to know' manner.

"Guess I should let you get changed," Embry almost looks like he's going to pout at the idea.

I giggle and kiss his chin before he backs away. "Yes, you should. I'll be out in a second," I tell him as he pulls a toothbrush from the bag he put in the truck this morning and brushes his teeth. He doesn't try anything else with me, just exits the bathroom and closes the door again. Now I'm the one pouting.

I quickly change into my pajamas, a t-shirt of Embry's and a pair of shorts tonight, then pull my hair back before brushing my teeth and flossing. I don't know why I'm taking my sweet time when I know he's out there waiting on me. I finally turn the light off before leaving the bathroom, allowing the door to stay cracked just enough for the moonlight to come through the window. Embry is pushing the covers back on the bed when I walk out. I glance over at the alarm clock, chuckling at how early it is. "Are we really going to bed already?" I ask.

Embry nods his head toward the TV and I notice the menu of a movie on the screen, "I was thinking we'd watch a movie until we fall asleep. How does that sound?"

I climb into bed, cuddling into Embry's side as he wraps one of his arms around me. "That works for me," I tell him and kiss below his jaw.

"I had fun tonight," he tells me as he hits play on the remote. I grin against his neck and kiss it softly before pulling away to whisper in his ear, "So did I. I can't think of a better way to spend an evening."

Embry's head pops up and he looks at me incredulously, "I know of a better way to spend an evening. No offense to the kids, but-."

I know what Embry is meaning right away and I feel my face flush a little. "Embry, seriously!" I tell him and he just grins and shrugs. _He has no shame. _

"Embry we can't. Honestly. Eli is in here and Claire is just upstairs. Besides, you promised Sam." It's obvious by the look on his face that he isn't expecting me to have this information. "Emily told me," I explain and he rolls his eyes.

"I should have known Sam would find a way to tell you his 'rule' too," Embry grumbles playfully.

"Don't be a brat," I tell him with a grin on my face. "If they were your kids, you would feel the same way," I say without thinking.

Embry doesn't respond right away but when he finally does his voice sounds strained, "Yeah, you're probably right."

I place my hand on Embry's chest, neither of us speaking again while I draw circles on his t-shirt with my finger tips. "I think we handled this pretty well, don't you?" Embry finally says and I smile into the nearly dark room, the TV flashing the scenes of the movie we aren't paying attention to.

"We make a good team, Embry."

Embry doesn't speak again for a while, he just moves a hand up and down my back gently. The touch makes me drowsy and even though it's just barely after nine o'clock I find myself sinking into that place between sleep and alertness. "We make an _excellent_ team, Lillah," he whispers to me and I nod my head, agreeing.

-0-

I roll over in my sleep and that's when I know something isn't right. There isn't a warm chest for me to roll in to. There aren't strong arms holding me tight. I reach out, patting the bed, but it's empty. My eyes open wide, frantically searching for him. That's when I also hear the soft sniffle of a baby.

My eyes finally find him walking around the room with Eli on his shoulder, patting him gently, whispering to him. I can just hear him say, "Please don't wake Lillah, man."

When he turns around his eyes fall on me and I see him sigh, "I'm sorry."

"It's ok, he's probably hungry. I'll go warm up his bottle," I slowly move to the edge of the bed.

Before I can stand, Embry is there in front of me, "You take him, I'll go get his bottle."

Sliding back against the headboard I pull the covers up over me again before reaching out to take Eli from Embry. I tuck him up against my chest, rocking my body slightly. Almost immediately, he calms down.

I hear Embry grumble, "Are you kidding me? I've been up with him for fifteen minutes trying to calm him down. Not. Cool. Kid."

Eli hiccups and whimpers again before starting to close his eyes. Embry sits down next to me on the bed, "I'm sorry he woke you up, I tried to calm him down."

"He didn't wake me up," I whisper, my eyes sliding closed on their own, "I woke up because your side of the bed was empty."

"Oh." Embry is quiet for a few moments. I can feel his eyes on me but I'm still so sleepy I don't say anything. "Do you think he still needs a bottle?"

"Not right now. Did you change his diaper?"

"Uh, no. How often does that have to happen?" I can hear the disgust in Embry's voice, which makes me chuckle. _How does he think these things get done? Eli certainly can't change himself._

Patting his bottom I can feel the diaper is pretty full, "As often as necessary. Mind grabbing his diaper bag? I'll change him."

Embry hands me the bag and I finally manage to wake up fully. I try to make quick work of the diaper change, handing the dirty one to Embry to dispose of. Eli cries softly until I get him bundled back up. I pull him back to me and start rocking my body again. Eli is back out before Embry climbs into the bed.

"Where did you learn to change diapers?"

I grin, leaning against him now that Eli is back asleep. I hold him tight against me as I whisper back to Embry, "My baby dolls."

"You learned on baby dolls?" Embry chuckles quietly.

"Uh-huh. I used to change them every morning," I grin up at him. "I had five baby dolls. My mom used to tell me I didn't have to take care of _all_ of them." Shaking my head I quote my standard response to her, "'Mommy! I have to practice now if I want to have five babies when I grow up!'" Twisting my neck I look up at Embry, grinning, "I was so certain then that I would have lots of babies."

Embry twists a lock of my hair around his finger, "And now?"

"'And now' what?" I glance at him, confused, my tired brain unable to follow his jump in the conversation.

"How many babies would you want now?" Embry asks quietly.

"Oh." I pause, trying to think of an answer. Deciding on the truth I finally respond, "I haven't thought about it in a while. That dream was kind of crushed-," I cut myself off, not wanting to mention Carter's name.

Unfortunately, Embry catches on, growling low, "Let me guess, that asshole didn't want kids so you resigned yourself to no kids."

"Something like that," I mumble, unable to look at him.

Embry is apparently still upset over this, "What kind of asshole wouldn't want to have kids with you? You'd make a great mom."

Cuddling Eli to me I shrug, "I don't think it was just me, he said he didn't want kids at all. I just accepted my fate."

"I really hate him. I can't believe you wouldn't let me kick his ass last week. He deserved it," Embry is grumbling now.

I laugh softly, not wanting to wake Eli, "Trust me, he's not worth you getting into trouble over."

"Trouble?" Embry scoffs and I look up at him, my eyebrows raised. He winks at me, "I would have given him to the vamps to finish off, they would have hidden the body!"

I don't say anything because I have no words. The idea that Embry could even think about that causes a shiver to run up my spine. Seeing my movement Embry starts to explain further, "What? I really don't like that guy. He's the scum of the earth. I don't even think the vamps would touch him. Why did you ever date him?"

I try to explain, "He was ok when we were younger but once we were in college he changed."

"Changed how? Like he became gay?" Embry chuckles at himself, which makes me shake my head.

"I'm pretty sure he isn't gay, considering he cheated on me with another woman," I hate admitting this to Embry, but he needs to know.

Embry growls, "Again, why didn't you let me kill him?"

"Because I need you here with me more than I need my stupid ex-boyfriend to get what he deserves." I feel like I need to explain why I stuck around with him for so long, "He was a decent guy in the beginning, but college was when he started telling me I was fat and that he didn't find me sexy. When he started being a jerk I just... stayed. We'd been together for so long I didn't know anything else. I- I didn't know any different; that there could be more. I believed everything he told me, until I found him having sex with another woman. Maybe I always knew, deep down, that he was cheating but I guess I didn't really care anymore."

Embry sighs, "Baby, what I don't get is how you could ever think you aren't sexy? How could you believe him? Seriously, if the other guys weren't imprinted, I would have to be fighting them off. They have all told me how sexy you are."

Kissing him against his neck I whisper, "You guys are a different breed from Carter."

"A different breed, huh?" Embry chuckles, "Are you trying to make a wolf joke?"

"No, not intentionally." I laugh, I honestly wasn't trying to make a joke, "But if the collar fits..."

"You could get me a collar that says 'Property of Lillah Hunter'," Embry smirks.

I shake my head and giggle a little at the vision that floats through my head. Embry wearing a leather studded collar. My eyes pop open wide and I giggle nervously. "I could do that. Back off bitches, he's mine," I tell him.

The grin on Embry's face blooms bigger and he wiggles his eyebrows. "I'm happy to be chained up to you." He pauses before sounding serious, "But I don't think there's a lot of women for you to be fighting off. Someone keeps me very occupied when I'm not working or patrolling."

I already know that he's not seeing anyone else but hearing him confirm it again makes my heart happy. "No other women, hmm?" I pull my bottom lip into my mouth, trying not to smile like a love sick idiot.

Embry looks into my eyes and shakes his head, "Nope, not unless you count a little doe-eyed girl, but she's asleep upstairs, and she's taken by Quil."

I release my lip and smile at him, envisioning Claire hugging her 'Uncle Bry'. "I don't know, she seems to really adore you. I might get jealous," I tell him teasingly.

Embry scoffs and looks at me like I've grown two heads, "You'd get jealous of an eight year old little girl? That'd be like me being jealous of Eli." He pauses for a second and looks down at the sleeping baby, I can practically see his mind churning. "Hmm, now that I think about, I don't like that he looks so comfortable sound asleep against your chest," Embry laments.

"You're just jealous that he's laying on my boobs," I tell him with a sarcastic smirk.

"That and he's giving me a look like 'Haha, I won. She picked me over you.' I don't like it." I nearly burst out laughing at this comment because Eli is sound asleep.

"I didn't pick him over you. It's comforting to babies," I explain gently. "They love boobs, both for nuzzling and sustenance."

Embry snorts in disbelief before speaking again, "Yeah, but he's a boy, we all like boobs in general." I roll my eyes at this; as if a baby knows something other than comfort and food when it comes to a woman's breasts. "I don't like having to share," he finally admits and I can't contain the giggle that bubbles up out of my chest.

"Share? Embry he's a baby!" I whisper loudly, trying to get my point across.

I glance back down at Eli and run my hand over the back of his head, playing with his thick, dark hair. He's drooling on my shirt, not that I mind, but I use my finger to wipe it away. Just as I finish and pull my hand away Embry leans down, his face close to Eli's as he whispers, "I understand, dude, they make me drool too." I take my hand and hit Embry's arm while I shake my head. I can't believe him some days. I never know what is going to come out of his mouth.

"I'm going to put Eli back in his bed," I tell Embry and playfully shove him away so I can scoot off of the bed without waking Eli. I can feel the heat on my face after Embry's words but I try to ignore it. It's crazy how he can make my whole body react with just a few words or a look. Tonight, I think he's determined to make me crazy.

Laying Eli down in his bed I watch him sleep. Climbing back in the bed with Embry I can still hear Eli softly snoring. Wrapping my arms around his chest I giggle, "Eli sounds like you."

Embry sounds offended when he responds, "I don't snore! That kid sounds like a train!"

"You sound like a train too, baby," I smile up at him. "Hasn't anyone ever told you?"

He looks surprised and then lost in thought. Next thing I know he has me pulled up in his lap and is kissing me softly before whispering, "No one has ever told me I snore, because I've never slept with anyone other than you."

"What? How-?" I'm shocked by this admission from him. _How could he have never slept with anyone else?_

He shrugs, "I don't know. I know I spent the night a few times at Jake's when I was a kid, but I usually slept on the floor. Otherwise, I just- never stayed around with anyone I was with." He pulls me against his chest, holding me tight as he whispers, "I never wanted to stay around with anyone before you."

My heart breaks for him. The more I hear about his life before me the more surprised I am. He really didn't have anyone other than the guys and imprintees. At the same time, it thrills me more than it probably should to know that I am the only woman he has ever stuck around for. I know deep down, this is a huge deal for him. "Then I'm a very lucky woman to get to have you in my bed every night."

I feel him chuckle underneath me, "You are. I feel pretty damn lucky myself to get to be here every night. Does my snoring bother you?"

"No," I shake my head before smiling up at him. "I like hearing you snore, I know you are still here."

"Don't worry, I'm not going anywhere any time soon," Embry kisses me, but is careful not to go too far. I'm glad he's able to control us, because right now I'm not sure I would have the will power to stop him if he pushed. Sighing softly Embry pulls back, changing the subject, "Back to the point; you never answered my original question. How many babies would you want now?"

I'm thankful that we are having this conversation in the dark because I can feel my face catching on fire. Remembering my conversation with Rachel yesterday I feel the butterflies start to take flight in my stomach. When I told her I'd have a dozen kids if I could be guaranteed a baby half as great as Eli I was being serious. He's a wonderful baby. Of course, Rachel once again made a comment that seemed both impossible and yet made me wish desperately it could be true. "Don't say that too loudly. Paul asks me every day how much longer until we can start trying. You tell Embry that and he'll have you knocked up tomorrow."

_What I wouldn't give for that to be true._ Unsure how to respond I keep my answer vague, "I don't know. I guess it would depend on who I'm having them with. He'd need to have a say in the number. Plus how old I am would definitely be a factor."

"What if- I mean, pretend it was me."

I'm trying to keep my breathing even but I'm freaking out inside. _Pretend it's him?_ I pretend every day in my head that I could have that life with him. That I could be married to him and pregnant with his baby. This isn't hard for me to imagine, but I try not to, because I want this dream so badly that it hurts to think about. "Um, in that case, how-how many kids would you want?"

"I don't know, as many as possible? I hated being an only child," I can't see his face but I feel him twisting my hair around his fingers.

Unable to play this game of pretend any longer I force myself to sit up and look him in the eye. Sucking in as much air as I can I choke out the next words, "Embry do you really want kids someday?"

"Yeah, I think I do. Do you?" Resting my head against his chest I'm surprised to hear his heart beating faster than I've ever heard it. I'm suddenly not sure that this was ever a game of pretend for him.

Not wanting to get my hopes up, I bury that thought, focusing on his question, "I think so."

I can feel Embry exhale, "Ok, so how many?"

"Four," I whisper, deciding to just throw a number out just to see what he says. "I hated being an only child too."

"Four? That's a lot of kids to take care of. What about your job? I can't see you wanting to be a stay-at-home mom, you love teaching." Embry is back to not looking me in the eye. I don't know where this conversation is going but I'm afraid to push any further.

I finally let my mind wander, imagining this house full; Embry and I married with four kids. I can easily see a little girl around Claire's age all the way down to a baby Eli's age, each of them two or three years apart. I know he's right, it would be a lot of work. One, maybe two kids in school, a toddler and an infant. They would all want my attention and I know I would be happy to give it to all of them. At that point I wouldn't care about teaching, I'd have my own family to worry about.

Answering his question I whisper out, "Anything is possible. If it meant spending time with my babies, giving them the attention they want and need, I'd definitely consider it."

Embry is quiet and I find myself starting to doze off again, the tension I felt as we started this conversation now completely gone. I don't know what will happen but it makes me happy just to know that Embry would even consider having kids. This whole conversation feels like it could have been a dream, but I know it was real.

"Hmmm, interesting," I hear Embry mumble.

Remembering he never game a number I curl up around him, speaking low against his chest, "What about you? How many do you want?"

I can feel him laughing against my ear, "I don't know, six? I'd love a house full of kids."

Letting my eyes drift close I add two more kids into my dream world with Embry. It's a crazy bustling house and I love it. I'm not sure if I'm awake or dreaming when I mutter, "That's a lot of kids, Em. Who's going to take care of all of them?"

I don't hear a response from him right away so I assume I asked the question in my dream. Returning to that happy place I let myself dream for once of that perfect life I wish I could have.

When I hear Embry speaking it's in my dream, I'm pretty sure. He's holding my tight, laughing at the chaos around us, "We would Lills. We'd take care of our kids."

-0-

**A/N: **Hope the cuteness didn't kill you too much!

*waves* Hi! Aunt Emily says I'm not 'pposed to talk to strangers but Miss WH and Miss NKR says it's okay this one time. I had so much fun with Uncle Bry and Aunt Lillah. Shhhh! Don't tell Uncle Bry I called her that yet but I know she'll be my Aunt Lillah REALLY soon. I hope I get to come back to the pretty room soon. I can't WAIT until Uncle Bry tells Miss Lillah he loves her so she can have a sparkly ring. *sighs dramatically* Did you know Halloween is my favorite holiday? I can't wait to show off my costume! Just wait 'til you see me and my Quily. I'll see you again soon! -Claire Young, age 8 (transcribed by "Miss NKR" - because Claire wanted to say "hi" to her "fans")


	32. Chapter 32 Gotta Let You Know

**Chapter 32 "Gotta Let You Know"**

**Disclaimer:** We gotta let you know, never gonna be SM!  
**  
A/N:** We can't begin to tell you how scary it is that we are posting Chapter 32. Seriously, we were just writing this a few weeks ago. Things are happening so fast for these two. You might want to have a little tissue handy, things get a little emotional over these next few chapters.

_Time, is going by, so much faster than I,  
And I'm starting to regret not spending all of it with you.  
Now I'm, wondering why, I've kept this bottled inside,  
So I'm starting to regret not telling all of this to you.  
So if I haven't yet, I've gotta let you know..._

_Never gonna be alone!  
From this moment on, if you ever feel like letting go,  
I won't let you fall...  
Never gonna be alone!  
I'll hold you 'til the hurt is gone.  
_"Never Gonna Be Alone" - Nickleback

**EPOV**

"Good morning, Uncle Bry."

Walking into the pink room I'm barely able to suppress my grin as I see Claire dancing around to the music she is humming. I'm pretty sure it's one of the songs from 'The Little Mermaid', but I'd have to ask Lillah to be sure. Sitting on the bed, I manage to smile at her without laughing, "Good morning. Did you sleep ok?"

"Yep. Uncle Bry, this room is super pretty. Miss Lillah said I could come back."

Checking out the room again I smile at Claire, "This room is perfect for a little girl like you. You know Miss Lillah really likes you, I think it makes her happy having you here."

Claire sighs dramatically sitting on the bed next to me. After last night, I know this means she is about to give me a piece of her eight-year-old wisdom. "Uncle Bry, I think after you marry Miss Lillah, you should have a little girl like me. She can have this room and I can come play Barbie's with her. We can be best friends."

Biting back my laugh I smile down at her, "We'll see, Bear. One step at a time. You hungry?"

"Yep!" Claire jumps from the bed, pulling me by my arm, "Come on! Let's go find Miss Lillah."

Claire "drags" me down the stairs, laughing the whole way. Not wanting to wake Lillah up, I take Claire into the kitchen for breakfast, surprised when I find Lillah already sitting at the table. I nearly fall over when I see she's holding Eli and feeding him a bottle. How feeding a baby can be sexy I don't know, but she not only makes it look sexy, she looks like she was meant to be the woman I see in front of me. _A mom._

Claire skips into the kitchen, hugging Lillah when she gets up in the chair next to her, "Morning Miss Lillah!" She coos down at Eli, "Good morning, Eli."

Following Claire I stop behind Lillah's chair, sliding my hand over her silky hair until she tilts her head to look up at me. Leaning down I kiss her softly, "Good morning, beautiful."

"Morning," Lillah smiles, but her cheeks darken slightly.

I offer to make breakfast for everyone while Lillah finishes feeding Eli. Deciding on pancakes, eggs, and bacon, I set about making Claire's food first. As I set the plate down in front of her with two small pancakes she gasps up at me, "You made Claire-sized pancakes! You're the best Uncle Bry!"

I make a plate for Lillah while she gets milk for everyone, having now placed Eli in his chair. Tearing up a few pieces of pancake, I place them on Eli's tray before sitting down myself. I'm surprised how quiet the table is, but when I look around, everyone seems to be enjoying their food. Lillah winks at me from across the table, "This is really good, Embry. Thank you."

Once everyone is finished eating, I offer to clean up the kitchen while Lillah gets the kids dressed. Once I finish, I find Lillah on the bed blowing raspberries on Eli's tummy while Claire giggles beside her. Eli is of course giggling along with Claire. I stop in the doorway, just watching Lillah with the kids. She somehow manages to balance her attention between the two of them, making both feel special. I wasn't completely joking when I mentioned six kids in the middle of the night but it still shocked me that Lillah would even be willing to consider that many. I thought for sure she would laugh in my face when I told her to pretend she was thinking about having kids with me, but instead, she pushed back, wanting to know if I was really interested in kids. It took all of my will power not to tell her the truth; that the only person I would ever be interested in having kids with is her.

Watching her I know I'd give her as many children as she wants. None, one, or a dozen; it wouldn't matter as long as I could see her as happy as she is right now. All I care about is her happiness. Lillah looks up and catches me watching her; she blushes lightly at being caught but smiles happily. I see her mouth, "Hi."

"Hi." I grin back at her, walking around the bed to kiss her on the cheek. "Mind if I take a quick shower?"

She grins up at me, "Go ahead, you know where everything is."

Undressing quickly in the bathroom, I try not to think about how this is the first time I've taken a shower here. Unfortunately, her scent surrounds me as soon as I step in and I'm unable to avoid it. I focus on a quick shower, knowing that she is waiting for me. I promise myself that I will use this shower again, preferably with her, if I can just focus this time. I manage to wash up and get dressed in record time, mostly because of needing to get out of the bathroom before my dick explodes from needing to be with her.

She is still playing with the kids when I walk out. I sit next to her on the bed and she leans her head against my chest, inhaling softly. She does this a lot, but I don't think she wants me to know she does. What she doesn't know is that I inhale her scent just as often. This time she giggles though, whispering so Claire can't hear, "I smell me on you."

Shaking my head at her I laugh, whispering back, "I smell you on me all the time. Your shower smells like you."

"I think you need to shower in my bathroom every day then. That's a better deterrent than a 'Lillah Hunter' collar." She winks at me.

"A collar? Like a dog? Miss Lillah, you're silly!" Claire giggles before climbing into my lap. "So what are we going to do today?"

Lillah looks over at me and I shrug, "Play a game?"

"Yay! I love games!" Claire squeals before jumping off the bed. She looks back at us once she hits the doorway, "Come on slow pokes!"

-0-

The morning speeds by and before I know it, the doorbell is ringing. I'm actually disappointed to find Sam and Emily standing on the porch. As much as I enjoy quiet time with Lillah, getting to pretend to be a family for a day has been amazing. I find myself not wanting to give it up just yet, but knowing I have to.

After hugs all around and promises that everyone is welcome back any time I stand back as she closes the front door. She doesn't look at me right away so I pull her against me, my hand sliding over her hair, "I know. I didn't want them to leave, either."

"I feel so stupid, I'm sorry, Embry," she smiles up at me, but she still looks sad. "I know we were just babysitting, but they are amazing kids; it's just hard to let go."

"You don't have to apologize, Lills. They are pretty amazing kids," I kiss her softly, my thumbs gently sliding over her cheekbones. I'm suddenly hit with an idea, a way to cheer her up. "Do you have any plans this afternoon?"

"Just my normal stuff; clean house, do laundry, lesson plans for this week. Why?"

"Come on, let's get out of here. We need to celebrate."

Lillah looks at me like I've lost my mind, "Celebrate what, Em?"

"You go get ready, put on hiking boots and warm clothes. Grab your camera too. I'll pack us some lunch," I wink before turning her around to point her body toward the bedroom. Lightly swatting at her ass, I laugh when she squeals, "Hurry up!"

"You sure are a bossy wolf!" I hear her laughing as she walks down the hall.

Running to the kitchen I pull together sandwiches, fruit, vegetables and some of the cookies from last night. I also grab a bottle of wine and two glasses. _If we're going to celebrate, we need to toast._ Shaking my head at myself I realize I've gotten just as bad as the other guys, planning a celebration as a way to cheer her up. However, when I look at the calendar hanging on the refrigerator I'm suddenly struck that we actually do have a reason to celebrate. I finish packing up, excited now to spend the day with Lillah.

-0-

"Close your eyes," I direct her as we approach the Reservation.

Lillah laughs, shaking her head at me, "Embry, I know we are on the Reservation, there's no surprise there."

"The surprise is where on the Reservation we are going. Close your eyes," I insist, but still grin at her, enjoying the banter.

She closes her eyes but talks directly to me, "Just how am I supposed to walk to wherever you are taking me with my eyes closed?"

Parking the truck, I pull the tarp, blanket, and cooler of food from the back. Handing her the tarp and blanket I ask her to hold them. I make sure she also has her camera before scooping her up in my arms, "Who said you were walking?" Watching her face I see her eyes open just slightly, "Hey! Eyes closed, I said."

She laughs against my chest, burying her head under my chin, "Sorry, baby. I'll behave."

Even carrying Lillah and the cooler, I'm able to walk at a steady pace through the woods. Once I reach the edge I stop, taking the stuff from her hands and setting it all down. Pulling her so her back is against my chest, I speak softly against her ear, "Open your eyes."

Lillah's hands rest against mine as she leans back, letting me support her while she takes in everything around her. She looks back at me and smiles, "You brought me to the cliffs?"

"Yeah, well, I cut your time short up here a few weeks ago. I thought you might enjoy a picnic here," I kiss down her neck, my lips barely touching her skin.

Lillah spins in my arms, her lips finding mine easily. I feel pretty confident this was a good idea, but it makes me feel better when she leans back and grins, "This is perfect, thank you, Embry."

Making sure to stay back from the edge I lay out the tarp and blanket, then started to unpack our lunch. It makes me grin like the love-sick fool I am that she automatically snuggles up against me when she sits down. Everyday it feels like she is becoming more and more comfortable around me. This thrills me more than she will ever know.

-0-

"Em, can I ask you a question?" Lillah glances over at me as we finish up our lunch, but that bottom lip is again trapped between her teeth.

I try to ease her tension by moving my hand up and down her side, "You can ask me anything, Lills, you know that."

"You were really upset when you found me up here," I nod my head in agreement with her assessment. She glances down at her hands then peeks up at me, "You mentioned you thought I was going to jump. Why did you think that?"

I hesitate, trying to figure out how much I should tell her. Deciding that if I'm going to accept her I need to start telling her everything, I turn her around to face me before I speak.

"You met Bella, Ness' mom," Lillah nods, obviously remembering that day. Exhaling slowly I explain, "Before she had Ness, before she was a vampire, she and Jacob were best friends. Ness' dad, Edward, left Bella for a time, and that's when she and Jacob became close. That's about the time I met her. She was cool, but you could tell him leaving really messed her up. It seemed like her friendship with Jacob was helping her, but then something happened, I'm not sure what but next thing I know I'm seeing her jumping off this very cliff through Jacob's eyes."

Lillah gasps, "She jumped? Why?"

Resting my forehead against hers I sigh, "I don't know why she jumped. What I do know is she was human then and she just barely lived through it. Jacob pulled her out of the water and saved her, but it was close." Opening my eyes I look at her directly, "When I saw your feet dangling off the edge, I just knew you were going to jump, like Bella.

"I've seen her jumping a thousand times in my head because of Jacob replaying it in his mind so much over the years. I had to stop you from jumping, I couldn't lose you after-," I frown, unable to continue. Brushing my fingers over her soft hair I whisper, "There has only been one time in my life I've been more panicked than I was in that moment."

"When?" Her eyes are wide with shock and curiosity.

Taking a deep breath I answer her question with the truth, "The week before when you walked up on Paul phasing."

"Why were you panicking then, Embry?" Lillah looks confused, "I mean, I was shocked, no question, but I don't understand why Paul phasing would have panicked _you_."

"Because Paul let's the wolf take over when he's phased. He embraces his animal instincts and you were an outsider that had just seen him change. My only thought was of saving and protecting you from him. I couldn't let him hurt you." Kissing her slowly, I whisper, "You were too precious to me, even then, to lose you."

"Hmmm, if I was so precious to you, then why did you push me off your lap?" Lillah winks at me, managing to lighten the mood, "You sure had a funny way of showing you cared, Em."

Shaking my head I laugh along with her, "I know, I screwed things up in the beginning, but I'm trying to make it up to you now."

"I know you are, Embry." She scrapes her fingernails lightly over my chin as she speaks, "But you don't have to. Everything that happened got us to this point and I can't lie, I really like where we are right now."

"I like where we are right now too," picking her up easily and standing, I carry her over to the edge of the cliffs, or as close as I feel safe taking her. I set her down on her feet and hold her close to me.

"Em," Lillah looks up at me, pleading in her eyes, "I'm not going to jump. I'm not going anywhere. Right now, right here with you, this is where I want to be. Trust me."

Relaxing my grip on her, I take a step to her side, though I still keep one of her hands wrapped in mine. Lillah lowers herself to sit on the ground, her feet once again dangling over the edge. I sit next to her, keeping a tight hold on her hand, but managing to enjoy the view without completely worrying about her.

"So do all Quileute's carry the wolf gene?"

I glance at her, surprised by the question, but she's looking out at the ocean, a smile on her face. "No, according to the legends it goes back to Taha Aki; only his sons could transform into wolves. As many of us as there are now, only five or six families carry the gene, all related somehow to the Ateara's, Black's, or Uley's." When I catch her looking at me, I wink, "You carry the gene, being an Ateara."

"Then I guess I'd better have kids with someone that knows the legends. I'd hate for one of my children to phase and have to explain that to my husband." Lillah taps her chin, "I wonder if Quil was serious last night..."

Before she can say anything else I scoop her up in my arms and run back to the blanket. Lillah laughs and squeals until I set her down, my hands automatically moving to tickle her. Laughing along with her I pull her squirming body to rest on top of me, "I'm going to tell Claire you said that if you don't take it back."

"You wouldn't!" She screams as she moves out of the range of my hands.

Moving across the blanket easily I pin her underneath my body, "I will if you don't take it back!"

"Fine, I take it back." Lillah giggles before kissing me softly, "Well, the part about Quil." Wiggling her eyebrows she pulls me down to her lips.

Leaning back from her I look her in the eyes, smiling, "Why suddenly interested in the wolf gene?"

"No reason, I was just thinking. I mean, I know your mom never told you who your father was," Lillah's fingers tangle in my hair as she looks away briefly, whispering, "I just didn't know if you ever wondered about your father or if you have any other family." When her eyes return to mine, she whispers quietly, "It just makes me sad to think you are all alone, Em."

"Lills, I'm not alone. I have the guys, the imprintees," I smile at her, "and now you."

"But don't you wonder about your dad? If you have other family? A sibling?" She is frowning slightly, which surprises me.

Sitting back from her I take a moment to consider her question. I look out at the ocean, verbalizing my thoughts as I work through them, "Growing up, it was just mom and me. We were a team. I can't say I didn't wish I had a dad, but mom was great. I had no reason to ever wonder who my father might have been.

"But then I phased and suddenly my father became a huge deal. I learned pretty quickly how to tune the other guys out."

Lillah wraps her arms around me, resting her head on my shoulder, "Did they say stuff?"

"Like I said, there are only a few families that carry the gene. So, for me to phase meant the man that fathered me had to be a part of one of those families." Smiling sadly down at her I give her all the dirty details, "Thing is, all the men that come from those families, that carry the gene, were married with families when my mom got pregnant."

"Oh Em," Lillah hugs me tight, "I'm so sorry."

Relaxing against her, I'm surprised how much telling her all this helps. It's like she feels my pain for me, which helps me to not feel like I need to keep carrying it around. I feel relieved to tell her this.

After a few moments, Lillah looks up at me, her grey eyes locked on mine, "You said they were all married with families. So you could have siblings?"

Nodding I keep my eyes locked on her and I tell her what hasn't gone outside of our packs as far as I know, "Based on the discussions the other guys had early on, Jacob, Quil, or Sam could be my half-brother."

"What?" Lillah sits up straight now, her hands holding mine tight.

Shrugging, I look down at our joined hands, "I tuned the other guys out because I was sick of hearing their speculations, but according to them, Billy, Quil's dad, or Joshua Uley are the possible 'candidates' to have fathered me."

"Embry," Lillah speaks softly before crawling up in my lap, "have you ever asked any of the guys? Tried to find out for sure?"

I lay my head on the top of hers, whispering, "I never really cared to know. All the guys feel like my brothers, and I didn't want to destroys a man's reputation, all these years later."

"I understand." She leans back, tilting her head to the side and smiling softly, "If you ever do want to find out, I'll be here to help you. You don't have to go it alone any more."

I don't understand how it's possible, but she makes me fall more in love with her every second. Kissing her lightly on her nose, I thank her, then grin, "Enough emotional crap. Let's discuss how sexy you find me and how you couldn't take your eyes off me when I came up here to rescue you. Here I was, being the gallant knight, rescuing the damsel in distress, and you were checking me out."

"You were _naked_!" Lillah laughs, shaking her head at me, "That was a little, well, shocking to me. Here I was thinking you hated me then you are making out with me under the bleachers, wanting to be friends, and inviting me to the bonfire. That's a lot for a girl to process in twenty-four hours." She winks at me before pulling my hand from its natural resting place on her hip into her lap, playing with my ring again, "Then you show up here naked, ordering me around, pulling me back from the cliffs and freaking out. Did I mention you were naked?"

"Tell me the truth, you sneaked a look, didn't you?" I wiggle my eyebrows, knowing this will embarrass her beyond belief.

Her face flames bright pink as I expected but she manages to remain calm otherwise, "I didn't look. I'm glad I didn't, I think I might have run screaming at that point." She actually giggles, resting her head on my shoulder, "You are very sexy Embry. Since the first day I met you I haven't been able to take my eyes off of you."

"I know." I grin, remembering that first day. Lillah leans back, one eyebrow raised at me. I can't help laughing, "I meant I know you can't take your eyes off me. Geez, I'm not that conceited, Lills." Kissing her softly I grin, "You are the sexiest woman I've ever met. I don't ever want to take my eyes off of you."

Lillah's fingers move to my hair, tugging gently as her lips move over mine slowly. When she finally leans back to take in air, she grins at me, "You make me feel sexy. Thank you."

"Believe me, it's definitely my pleasure!"

The sound of her laughter warms my heart. She returns to resting her head on my shoulder, looking out at the ocean. After a few minutes of silence she speaks again, "You mentioned a celebration. Are you going to tell me what we are celebrating?"

"You don't remember?" I'm proud of myself for realizing the date earlier.

"No, should I?" She looks confused.

I shrug, trying not to make it seem like a big deal, even though I'm excited about it, "A month ago tomorrow we met."

I had no expectations of Lillah's reaction to our anniversary of sorts, but I can tell she's definitely taken by surprise. "Oh. Wow. Oh my gosh! I didn't even realize. It- it feels like just yesterday. Really? A month?"

Not wanting to say much, I nod. I'm almost ready to grab her chin and ask her to tell me what she's thinking when she finally looks up at me, smiling, "Definitely worth celebrating. Em-." She pauses, grabbing my right hand again and holding it in her right hand, our friendship rings touching, "Embry, this has been the best month of my life, all because of you."

To say I'm stunned is an understatement, "Really? Even with," I feel myself cringing thinking back, "how I acted in the beginning."

"Yes, even with that," Lillah chuckles. She cups my face with her left hand, "It made me appreciate getting to see you so happy."

Pulling her tight against me again, I whisper as we both stare off into the ocean, "You are all I will ever need to be happy."

We sit in silence, watching the sun begin to lower. I ask if she wants to go for a walk on the beach but she says no. I'm surprised but she explains, "I want to just enjoy watching a beautiful sunset with my boyfriend." I'm happy to accommodate.

-0-

The drive back to Lillah's house is quiet. So quiet I almost think she's fallen asleep until I hear her giggling. Turning to her I raise an eyebrow, "What?"

"Nothing." When I continue to look at her she shakes her head, laughing, "It's nothing, just a silly thought I had."

"Which was?"

She buries her head in my chest, laughing, "I was just thinking about who your father could be. I don't think it's Billy."

"I don't think it's Billy either, to tell you the truth." As much as I wish it could be Billy, he's too honorable of a man, I just can't see him letting me live in the dark like that. "So what about it not being Billy made you laugh?"

"I was just thinking, if it was Billy, then that would mean not only would you have a half-brother, but two half-sisters. Including Rachel," Lillah doesn't continue because she is back to laughing.

"Oh God! Please don't let it be Billy then!" I cringe, thinking about having Rachel as a sister.

Lillah gasps for air, "What's so funny is you two already argue like siblings, especially over me! Neither one of you wants to share your new toy."

I tamper down the need to growl at this statement, "I share, she's the selfish one that hogs you. She sees you every day at school, why does she have to see you at night when it's my time?"

Lillah climbs in my lap as I stop the truck, "Rachel is my friend and I love spending time with her, but trust me, you have a clear advantage over her. You are my boyfriend."

My lips find hers and I pour every bit of feeling that I can into the kiss. Our kiss is slow and intense and I have the strangest feeling she is returning as much feeling as I'm giving. I manage to hold on to her tight as we exit the truck, carrying her up to the front porch. I don't release her until we reach the front door. Letting her legs slide down my body I press her back against the front door, our mouths still attached to one another while I unlock the knob and deadbolt without looking. I give Lillah a little nudge once the door is open so that she starts to walk backwards through the entry way. She reaches down, laces our fingers together as we walk and my heart constricts. I can't wait to tell her the truth, to spend the rest of my life with her; loving her is the only thing I want to succeed at in this world. I slowly pull away from her lips as we stop in the bedroom. Lillah stares up at me with the softest, most beautiful smile on her face.

"Thank you for my surprise, Embry," she says quietly, her voice full of something I can't make out.

I smile at her as my hands squeeze hers gently, "You're welcome, baby. I had an amazing day. Thank _you_ for spending it with me."

"I wouldn't be anywhere else. I would do this every day if I could," Lillah tells me in earnest.

I pull her hands, moving us toward the bathroom. We both need a shower after the downpour that started just as we began packing up. Preparing to let her shower first, I watch while she lifts her hair up off of her neck, twisting it around and around on top of her head and then securing it. My eyes roam up the back of her neck while I lean against the door frame. She has such beautiful skin, adorned by a little patch of freckles that I hadn't noticed before. I push away from the door and walk over to her, dropping a kiss on the little cluster. Lillah shivers and I grin against her skin. I love seeing her physical reactions to something as simple as a kiss. Pulling her back into my arms, I hold her gently but firmly. She rests her head against my shoulder and I turn my face to kiss her cheek.

We stand this way for a few minutes before Lillah pulls away slowly. She turns to me, kissing my lips lightly before looking up at me. "Would you like to join me?"

I swallow thickly, my throat unable to do what my mind is instructing it to do. "In the sh-shower?" I ask. _Duh. Dumbass. What else could she mean?_ She smiles at me and nods her head, looking up at me, waiting patiently for my answer. _How can I tell her no? How can I deny either of us this time together?_

"I'd love to," I tell her as I turn to close the bathroom door.

-0-

I've just stepped out of the shower when I hear fists pounding on my front door. Knowing who it is, I yell out, "Door is open assholes! No need to break it down. I'll be out in a minute."

_One more thing she's ruined for me._ Showers will never be the same for me after Sunday night. I just barely managed to stop myself before pinning her to the wall. Now taking a shower is like foreplay; I hear the water running and all it can think of is Lillah. I'm back to having to take care of things myself in the shower, which I now know is a poor substitute for the real thing; hopefully this trip today will help alleviate that problem, soon.

Quickly pulling on my clothes I run my hand through my damp hair. I know I need a hair cut but I don't want to since Lillah likes playing with it now that it's longer. _Or pulling on it. Not that I mind. _As much as it feels like my hair is in my face, she seems fascinated by it, so I've been reluctant to get it cut.

I step out of the bedroom, seeing Jared pacing across the tiny living room while Sam sits patiently on the sofa. Jared stops abruptly when he sees me, "Finally, come on man! I want to get back as soon as we can, Kim's getting off early tonight and we are both playing hooky tomorrow."

"How'd you convince Kim to miss work?" I narrow my eyes at Jared, knowing something is up. Kim loves her job too much to miss a day.

"Fine, she has the day off. I'm the one playing hooky," Jared shrugs but grins at me.

Sam clears his throat, "You know I'd just let you take the day off if you wanted, no need to skip. Trust me, I understand needing some mid-week quality time when your girl is pregnant."

Jared grins wide, "In that case, can I take every Wednesday off?"

"Sure, but then I'll need you to cover Embry's Saturday shifts." Sam grins at me as he stands from the couch.

"Why?" Jared grumbles as he turns to the door. I'm not sure what Sam is up to, but I wouldn't turn down having my Saturday's free.

"I know Kim works on Saturday, Lillah doesn't. Let the poor guy have some time with his imprintee," Sam crosses his arms over his chest, not moving until he hears Jared's response. I'm anxious myself to know what he'll say. The idea of getting to sleep in with Lillah on Saturday mornings sounds amazing.

Jared looks between us then rolls his eyes, "Fine, as long as I get Wednesday's with Kim, I'll work his Saturday shifts. Can we go now?"

"Sounds like a plan to me, thanks guys." Laughing I grab my keys, "Alright, let's go, I don't want to be the one that holds Kim up from time with your lazy ass."

I lock up then get in the backseat of Jared's Bronco as Sam climbs in the passenger's seat. Jared takes off before Sam even shuts his door. "Calm down, Jared," Sam speaks evenly but I can hear the warning in his voice, "You didn't have to join, Embry and I can still go on our own."

"No, it's cool, I need to go shopping." Jared looks back at me, exhaling, "Sorry, I'm just so excited about Kim being pregnant. I don't want to miss a moment with her."

Sam chuckles, "It doesn't get any better once the baby gets here. As much as Emily and I loved getting away this weekend, we missed Claire and Eli. It was like part of us was absent. I swear Eli grew while we were away."

"He definitely grew on Lillah. I'm almost jealous of the attention she gave him," grinning at Sam I shove his shoulder with my fist.

Sam chuckles, "I know how you can fix that jealousy."

I'm pretty sure what he's going to say, but I ask anyway, "How?"

"Grow a pair and tell her everything. Then have a kid of your own. Watching them take care of your child, man there is no jealousy then." Sam turns his head to look at me, "Getting this ring will push you over the edge."

"Why is that?" Chuckling I lean back against the seat, getting comfortable.

Sam rolls his eyes, "You are so clueless. Jared, want to explain?"

"Man, that ring will burn a hole in your pocket. Every moment you are with her you'll be thinking about the ring. It haunts you until you get it on her."

A month ago, I would have been rolling my eyes hearing these two talk. Now, I know they're right. As much as it's on the tip of my tongue to tell her everything whenever we are together, having a ring ready for her will kill me. "Well shit."

Sam and Jared laughing should piss me off but I can't help laughing with them. Sam grabs my attention, "Any thoughts on the ring?"

"I want something unique for her." I pause, trying to imagine a real ring on Lillah's finger. I picture her hand in my mind but every version of a diamond I see seems to fade into her pale skin. Wanting something that stands out on her, I clear my mind of the diamond. Letting my mind wander I'm reminded of the first time I saw her holding Eli, how she looked with her back to the fire, her hair seeming to become part of the warm flames behind her. The red of the fire reminds me of that ring Lillah was looking at a few weeks ago in the jewelry store window. I'm trying to remember what the ring looked like, but even just picturing the red stone on her hand I know that's the one, "Mind if we go to Fountain Square Jewelers?"

They look at each other and shrug. Sam speaks up, "That actually works for me, Emily was looking in that window again on Saturday night. I'm pretty sure I know what she was looking at."

I hesitate before I ask the next question, "Any other ideas on jewelry, besides the ring? Lillah's birthday is on Friday. I have something I want to give her, but I'm not sure..." My voice trails off slowly.

"What do you want to give her?" Jared asks, eying me in the rear view mirror.

Shrugging I look down at my friendship ring, feeling more at ease thinking about her, "My mom had this locket she always wore. It had an 'L' engraved on the front and both of our names engraved on the inside. I was considering giving her that, but I'm not sure. I feel like I should give her more."

"Why not give her the ring on Friday?" Jared asks.

"I don't want to miss Paul and Rachel's wedding." Jared actually turns back to look at me, obviously confused how giving Lillah the ring on Friday would tie to Paul and Rachel's wedding. I explain slowly for him, "I won't let her out of the bed, let alone the house, if she actually loves me and says yes. I'm going to finally make love to her and make her mine completely." I try not to think about what will happen if she rejects me. At this point, I'm too far gone. _I will beg her to give me a chance if I have to._

I can see Jared roll his eyes, "You still haven't fucked her? Jesus man, are you going for sainthood? What are you waiting for?"

"I want to explain everything first, tell her I love her. Actually hear her say she loves me too."

Jared still looks confused but at least his eyes are back on the road when he speaks, "She's dating you, what more do you want?"

"I want everything." Sighing I vocalize what I'm still coming to terms with myself, "I- Shit- I want to accept her. I want to be with her forever. Fuck- I want what you and Kim have and what Sam and Emily have."

"Took you fucking long enough to realize that," Jared laughs. "God you're a stubborn ass. I think you even top Sam over here."

"I heard that, Jared," Sam speaks in a deep tone, one of his warnings. Turning back to me Sam raises his eyebrows, "You finally ready to admit she loves you?"

"I hope she does," just thinking about it makes me nervous, but exhaling slowly I look Sam in the eyes. "I know she likes me. I know she's attracted to me. Hell, I know she wants me."

Jared shakes his head, "She's your imprint man, she loves you."

Wanting to change the subject, I grin at Sam, giving him thanks for letting us watch the kids the other night, "Because of that we were able to actually discuss having kids. Even though it was still 'hypothetical', it made me feel like I have a chance."

Sam gets serious again as he speaks, "Embry, women don't joke about having kids with a man. You might have had a 'hypothetical' discussion to make it easier for her, but trust me, if she's talking about kids at all with you, she's serious."

I shrug, not wanting to get my hopes up. I felt like when we were talking the other night about kids there was something more going on, things Lillah wasn't telling me, but I wasn't sure. "Right now, I'm just focused on telling her everything and getting a ring on her finger. If I can just get her to accept me and say yes, I'll be satisfied."

Jared pulls into a parking spot near the jewelry store in Port Angeles, laughing, "That would be a step in the right direction. The way she looks at you, the way you look at her; everyone can tell you both want more than even just dating."

"Great, thanks for that." I scoff as I jump down from the Bronco. "What are you shopping for?"

Jared leads the way to the store, "I think I want to get Kim a necklace, one that you can add stuff too later. Like baby's birthstones."

Sam and Jared head into the store but I go to the display window first. My heart sinks when I don't see the distinctive red stone. I shuffle into the store, preparing myself mentally that they may not have that ring any longer.

When I walk in, Jared is looking at necklaces while Sam is talking with a sales person. I can't remember ever setting foot in a jewelry store before today; there's been no need. I'm overwhelmed by everything in here and unsure of where to start.

"May I help you, sir?" A pretty young sales lady walks up; she's smiling, so I guess I don't look too out of place here.

"Uh, yeah, my girlfriend's birthday is this Friday." I hesitate before asking, "There was a ring in the display case outside a few weeks ago, it had a red stone in the middle of it."

She nods enthusiastically, waving for me to follow her over to a case of rings. There are rings of all colors, sizes and shapes in here. _How they hell do you choose?_

"Oh, wow. Uh, where do I even start?" As I'm glancing over the case I don't see that distinctive red stone.

The sales girl chuckles, "You mentioned a ring with a red stone. A ruby?"

"No, I don't think so. This wasn't just a red stone so much as a thousand shades of red. From every angle it was a different color," I'm sure my description is not helping. I'm trying to resign myself that I won't be able to get this ring.

"Oh!" She gasps, a little surprised, "You mean the fire opal?"

"Yeah." I grin, a thrill running through me, "_That's_ what the little card said."

For the first time, the sales woman isn't completely smiling. This makes me nervous, "You don't have it any more, do you?"

She shakes her head, "No, that's not it at all, sir. We have the ring, but that is a very rare stone in an exquisitely made setting. I'm afraid to say everyone that has looked at it has loved it, until they hear the price."

"I'm not concerned about the price." I never in my life thought I'd say that, but buying a ring as special as Lillah is extremely important to me. Cost doesn't matter when it comes to something I want her to wear for the rest of our lives. I want it to be something she looks at every day and knows she is the most unique, beautiful, amazing person I've ever known.

"Very well then, sir," the sales lady's smile returns. "Give me just a moment, we moved the ring to the back."

"Did you run her off?" Sam approaches me, whispering.

"No, she's going to get the ring from the back. Did you get what you need?" I ask, pointing to the small bag in Sam's hand.

He grins, "Yep. Emily picks out, I purchase."

"That seems like a good plan," I laugh. "Do you get Emily a lot of jewelry?"

"No, but she saw this bracelet the other day while we were here. I'm going to give it to her tonight for our 'official' five year anniversary."

Shaking my head I grin at Sam, "Five years. Wow. Where has the time gone?"

"Don't know, feels like just yesterday she came into my life."

Before I can say anything else, the sales lady returns, waving her hand to indicate I should sit on a stool close to one of the cabinets. I can feel Sam walk up behind me, but I'm focused on the small grey box in her hand. She sets it on the counter then slowly opens the box.

Nestled against the cream interior of the box is the ring Lillah was looking at a few weeks ago, and it's the most beautiful ring I've ever seen. In the center is a round stone that is a dark orange almost red color. The unique stone is flanked on each side by leaves made out of many tiny diamonds.

"That's it." I grin up at the woman. "You said it's a fire opal?"

Her smile is wide, "That's right, a fire opal, but as you can see, there are diamonds on each side of it. According to our distributor, fire opal used to be considered symbols of a very intense love; like soul mates. We were surprised we got this one in, it's rare that we get something as unique as this in for the engagement ring display."

I feel a hand clap down hard on my shoulder, "Now that's a ring, man."

Glancing up at Sam I'm nervous to ask, "Do you think she'll like it? Is it too different?"

"No, I think it's perfect. Soul mates is a good description for the two of you." He grins then waves over his shoulder, "I'm going to check on Jared."

Turning back to the sales woman I look back down at the beautiful ring, "So this is actually an engagement ring?"

"Yes, sir. There is a wedding band designed to fit around it. We don't have it in stock but we could order it for you. It's beautiful, continuing the leaf design on the side of the ring. Also," she flips the ring over and points at a small gold heart on the bottom of the band that I hadn't noticed before, "engraved in this little heart are the words 'Love You Forever'. This is a special element to this designer, he calls it a 'Secret Heart'."

I lean forward to examine the little gold heart and sure enough, I can just barely see the words. As if this ring wasn't perfect for Lillah, this seals the deal, "This is the one."

The woman practically beams at me, "Wonderful! I just need some information. First, what size?"

_Shit._ I don't know Lillah's ring size. Small, that's for sure; when I changed her friendship bracelet into a ring to match mine I had to twist that thing five or six times. I'm suddenly struck with an idea.

Smiling I look down at my friendship ring, remembering that night Lillah placed it on my finger. It hasn't even been a month, yet it feels like years ago. So much has changed- _I've_ changed so much since then. I can't believe I ever thought I could just be friends with Lillah, let alone avoid her. She's my life now and I'm ready to make it official. "I don't know her exact size, but," pulling my ring off, I twist it until it looks about the same size as Lillah's, "can you get the size off of this?"

Laughing the sales lady takes the piece of string from me, "Sure, hold on."

As she walks away I pick up the ring again. Never in my life did I ever expect to be purchasing an engagement ring, but this feels right. She is not going to be happy with me that I kept the imprint from her for so long, but like Sam said, hopefully this will help ease her anger. I want her to know I love her, and I would love her with or without the imprinting.

The sales lady comes back, handing the piece of string back to me. I adjust it back to my ring size and slide it back on my right ring finger. She grins when I look back up at her, "You are a very lucky man."

"Why is that?" I laugh as I feel Jared and Sam walk up behind me.

She looks up at the two very large men standing behind me but turns back to me, smiling very wide, "It looks like your girlfriend's ring size is a six and this ring is a six. It's the only one we have in stock, but my manager said if you wanted it, we could go ahead and sell it to you today."

Looking down at the ring I don't hesitate as I speak, "I'll take it."

-0-

As Jared drives us back to La Push I'm trying to think of a gift for Lillah's birthday. The guys have given me a few ideas, but none of them feel right. Lillah will not be happy with me if I buy her something expensive, and beyond the ring that is now safely tucked in my back pocket, there is nothing I want to buy for her. Besides, my mom would want her to have that necklace, since she is, in face, the woman I love. Suddenly feeling very calm, I know this is the right decision.

Now that the decision is made on the present I need to figure out how I want to celebrate her birthday. I'd love to spend a quiet evening at home with Lillah on her birthday, but I know she loves Halloween and spending time with my "family". "What is everyone doing on Friday?"

"Taking the kids trick-or-treating. Claire is excited but I'm dreading having Quil tag along all night," Sam snarling makes me laugh, but I understand. Quil can be a handful, as I learned last weekend.

Jared laughs as he stops the Bronco in front of my place, "Kim and I don't have any plans, why?"

"Sam, you think the kids would want to trick-or-treat in Lillah's neighborhood? It's her birthday and I think she'd really love to have everyone come over to celebrate," I'm excited about this idea, knowing Lillah will love it.

"Sounds fine to me, but I'll check with Emily," Sam climbs out of the Bronco, stepping aside for me to climb out.

"While you are checking, mind asking Emily about also making a cake for Lillah? I hate to buy her one from a store but I can't bake," I try to give Sam my best pleading smile.

Shaking his head he climbs back into the Bronco, "Your ass owes me."

"I know, thanks Sam."

I don't even bother going into my place, heading straight for my truck. Sending out a few text messages I invite the rest of the guys and their imprints to Lillah's place on Friday before starting the truck. As I'm driving along to Lillah's house, I try not to think about the ring in my back pocket, but already I can feel it back there. Managing to calm myself down slightly as I pull into her driveway, I climb out, patting my back pocket to make sure it isn't obvious I have something back there.

The front door swings open wide just as I step on the porch then Lillah is in my arms, "Hi handsome, I've missed you."

"You just saw me this morning. Remember, we went for a run?" Easily carrying her back into the house, I close the door with my foot as she squirms in my arms.

"I remember, but it seems like forever," she giggles as she kisses me excitedly. "You're later than normal and you drove your truck. What have you been up to?"

Biting my cheek I try not to react to her question. _Damn she's observant._ Setting her down I take her hand, leading her into the kitchen as I shrug innocently, "So nosy. Don't you know you aren't supposed to ask questions when your birthday is so close?"

She narrows her eyes at me for just a second but then clears her face, "You know I don't expect you to get me anything for my birthday, Embry."

"I know." Needing to taste her I pull her into my arms, my lips gliding over hers as I whisper, "But I want to. I want to give you everything your heart desires."

She grins up at me, wrapping her arms around my neck, "You already have."

The ring burns in my back pocket but I manage to ignore it, letting myself get lost in Lillah.

-0-

Cutting my patrol time short on Thursday, I run home to grab a change of clothes and my mom's necklace. I was going to wrap it, but I want to surprise Lillah with it first thing in the morning tomorrow. Putting the necklace in my front pocket and checking to make sure the ring is still in my back pocket, I run out to the truck, excited for the next few days. I'm hoping to be able to pull her aside after the wedding to explain everything. I just have to survive until then, but that's easier said than done.

Pulling into her driveway, I'm surprised to see Angela's Honda parked there. While I know Angela still has stuff at Lillah's house, she is practically living with her boyfriend. Not that I can say anything, since I'm practically living with Lillah. Grabbing my change of clothes I run in, unsure what I'm going to find. The first thing I hear is Lillah laughing, which eases my tension, but then I hear another person laughing; a man.

Dropping my bag beside Lillah's purse I turn to the kitchen, stopping just inside the doorway. I assume the man I heard was Ben, because Angela is currently sitting in a man's lap at the kitchen table, while Lillah is at the stove, cooking. Lillah's cheeks are pink, which confuses me until I hear Angela's next words, "So I open the door, excited to hear about Lillah's big night out when the covers fly back and," Angela pauses, seeing me finally. Pointing at me, she laughs, "_He_ practically jumps out of Lillah's bed."

Lillah swings around, her eyes wide when she see me. Quickly moving to her, I pull her into my arms, "Hi baby. Are they embarrassing you?"

"No," she sighs, kissing me softly before resting her head on my chest, "Angela was just telling Ben about 'meeting' you the first time."

Kissing the top of her head I slowly release her before turning back to the couple at the table. Offering my hand I introduce myself, "Ben, right? I'm Embry."

Ben shakes my hand, still laughing at Angela's story, "Good to finally meet you man. Angie was just telling me about meeting you the first time."

"Want a beer?" Ben nods and I grab two beers from the refrigerator, sitting across from the two of them as I watch Lillah finish up at the stove. Taking a quick swig I grin over at Angela, "You might want to get your memory checked, Ang. That wasn't the first time we met. You let me in the house the week before. Remember? I was returning Lillah's jacket to her and you threatened to have Jacob and Paul kick my ass if anything were to happen to Lillah."

Angela claps her hand over her mouth, laughing, "Oh my gosh! I forgot about that!"

Lillah spins around, "Angela! You let him in the house that night? You knew he hated me."

"I did not know that! All I knew is you were pouting but you told me it wasn't a guy," Angela smirks over at me. "I guess technically it wasn't a guy, more of a man."

Ignoring Angela I pull Lillah to sit on my lap, wrapping my arms around her tight, "I've told you before, I didn't hate you."

"I know, it's just, after that day at the diner, I was pretty certain you never wanted to see me again. Then you were kissing me that night."

The memory excites me again. Even not knowing what was going on, Lillah still reacted to me immediately. I should have just told her then, but I know she wouldn't have believed me.

Beside us Angela is getting upset, "You made out with her that night? Good thing I didn't know that, I really would have had Jacob and Paul kick your ass."

"My Angie, so protective," Ben grins.

Lillah smiles at me then turns to Angela, "Jacob and Paul would have had to go through me to kick Embry's ass."

"Even then?" Whispering just for Lillah to hear me, I'm shocked by her words. _No way would she have been _that_ protective of me then._

She closes her eyes and rests her cheek against mine before speaking so softly I barely hear her, "Yes, even then, Embry."

No one says anything until Lillah jumps up from my lap, "Crap, dinner!"

As is our norm, I help her get everything ready. I grab the plates and get drinks while she serves the food. Dropping drinks and food off at the table for Ben and Angela, Ben laughs, "It's like watching a well choreographed dance with you two. Angie and I are running into each other constantly when we're cooking."

Holding Lillah's chair I grin when she sits down, quickly moving into my chair next to her. Grasping her hand I squeeze it tight as I look up at Ben, "We've had some time to practice our routine."

Dinner is quiet, but I'm curious the real reason why Ben and Angela are both here. As I'm clearing the dishes Angela gives Lillah her birthday present. When I return to the table Lillah is pulling a pretty purple sweater out of the bag. She shows it off then runs to the other side of the table, hugging Angela, "You didn't have to."

Taking Lillah's seat she happily sits down in my lap again when she finishes hugging Angela. Angela smiles but I'm surprised when I see a few tears. Lillah notices too, "Ang? What's wrong?"

Seeing Ben squeeze her hand I know this isn't going to be good news for Lillah. Angela smiles at Ben then turns to Lillah, "Nothing's wrong. I'm really happy and I hope you'll be happy for me. I love being your roommate, Lah, but-." When Angela pauses I grab Lillah's hands in mine. I can feel them trembling, just like the rest of her body. I try to whisper words of encouragement to Lillah to calm her down, but I know this can't be easy for her as Angela continues, "Ben and I found a house. It's not far from here, actually. We close on it tomorrow."

"You're moving out." Lillah whispers. My heart breaks for her. Even though Angela hasn't actually been at the house in probably two weeks, the idea that she was her roommate was something that meant a lot to Lillah.

Angela nods and I can see she's crying, "I am. It's time, Lah, especially now that you have Embry. I would have never left you alone here, but when I saw you guys together after Aunt Carolyn was here I knew it was time."

Angela and Lillah both stand and meet in the middle, hugging and crying. Glancing over at Ben he shrugs, just as unsure as I am on what to do for the two women. Finally they separate, now giggling. _Women._ When Lillah returns to my lap I can tell she's still emotional, but she smiles through her tears, "Congratulations you two. Buying a house is huge."

"Yeah, but we are excited to start our life together," Angela says as she looks in Ben's eyes. She turns back to Lillah, "You sure you are ok with this?"

Lillah nods slowly but I can still feel her heart racing against my chest. The ring in my back pocket seems to be mocking me but I know I can't right now. Lillah has school tomorrow, plus everyone coming over for her birthday, then the wedding on Saturday. _Just a couple more days and I can tell her everything. _

Instead, I cup her cheek, still feeling the moisture there. Pulling gently, I turn her head until she's looking at me. I'm unable to hold in my smile as I speak, "Does this mean you'll be needing a new roommate? Because I'd love to apply for that position."

Lillah doesn't say anything, just looks at me like I've lost my mind. I probably have lost my mind but I want to cheer her up, give her something until I can tell her everything.

Unable to handle her silence any longer I realize I must have read this wrong all along. If she doesn't want me to move in then she definitely won't want to marry me, let alone accept me as _her wolf_. Looking away from her I stare down at our joined hands, whispering, "I'm sorry I asked. I understand if you aren't ready for that. I just figured since I'm here all the time-."

"You are here all the time," I can hear the laughter in Lillah's words, but I'm surprised when she lifts my chin to look at her. Her face is still covered in tears but she is smiling and looks happy. "Embry, I'd love to have you move in. I wasn't sure if you were ready for that, so I wasn't even going to mention it. I mean, I know you have your," Lillah lowers her voice before continuing, "responsibilities to the tribe."

"Responsibilities that I can fulfill just as easily from here as I can from the Rez. Plus, if I'm here, then I can protect you and make sure you aren't lonely here is this big house," a slow smile grows on my face as I speak, getting excited that she might just agree to this after all.

Lillah starts kissing all over my face, "You really want to move in? Here? With me?"

Holding her face still I kiss her, speaking against her lips, "Wherever you are is the only place I ever want to be. I will be here as long as you want me here."

"Forever," Lillah smiles against my lips.

"I can do that," ignoring Ben and Angela I give Lillah all my love as I kiss her. Knowing she's willing to have me move in with her gives me more hope that she will be fine once I tell her everything. I hope so, because at this point, I really can't lose her.

Angela whistling pulls us out of our moment. When we both turn to her she's jumping out of Ben's lap and running over to hug both of us, squealing like a little girl, "I'm so excited! We both get to move in with the men of our dreams!"

Lillah catches my eye as she hugs Angela back. She's smiling but there is a hesitation there, something that holds her back from being as excited as I would expect her to be. Before I can ask, she's whispering back to Angela, "We are very lucky."

As Angela pulls back I begin to try to figure out how I'm going to explain all of this to Lillah. Because one thing is certain, I have to tell her everything as soon as I can after the wedding. I don't want her to have one single doubt about me, I want her to know everything, and be confident she is actually getting her dream man, if that really is what I am to her. _God I hope so!_

-0-

**A/N:** Just to prepare everyone, this was the **last** Embry chapter before he tells her. Next time you see Embry, it will be full on truth time. But don't think the story is over once the truth is revealed. There is still a lot going on with these two once everything is out in the open.

The "Secret Heart" rings do exist. NKR & WH have now decided they will only get married to a man that presents them with one of these rings. Here is the one that inspired Lillah's ring. http:/www[dot]markschneiderdesign[dot]com/company-info/bridaldetail/6/adore[dot]html We just took it a step further and added the fire opal as the center stone instead of a diamond.


	33. Chapter 33 Words Unspoken

**Chapter 33 "Words Unspoken"**

**Disclaimer:** Nope. Not SM. Sorry to disappoint.  
**  
A/N: **Things are falling into place. Thank you so much for coming along on this journey, but there are still a few surprises left in store! Hope you enjoy! Be sure to follow us on Twitter and Tumblr! We post fun things and when NKR gets her hands on the accounts, she posts teasers and pictures.

_Staring at the blank page before you  
Open up the dirty window  
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find  
Reaching for something in the distance  
So close you can almost taste it  
Release your inhibitions  
Feel the rain on your skin  
No one else can feel it for you  
Only you can let it in  
No one else, no one else  
Can speak the words on your lips  
Drench yourself in words unspoken  
Live your life with arms wide open  
Today is where your book begins  
The rest is still unwritten_  
"Unwritten" - Natasha Bedingfield

**LPOV**

My phone ringing wakes me up. Recognizing the ring tone immediately, I reach for it blindly then put it to my ear, speaking quietly so as not to wake Embry, "Good morning, Mom." After the last time she called, I made sure to give her and Daddy a different ring so I'd know not to let Embry answer it, just in case.

"Happy birthday my precious baby! Do you feel any different?"

"Actually," looking over my shoulder as I feel Embry starting to move I smile at him, "I do."

"Really. Would that difference be courtesy of a certain young man?"

"Maybe," I try to hold back my giggle as Embry kisses my bare shoulder.

I can hear my mom laughing on the other end of the line, "Tell Embry I said good morning."

Covering the phone, I whisper to Embry, "Mom says good morning."

Embry grins, taking the phone from my hand, "Good morning Mrs. Hunter." He pauses and then laughs, "Alright, Carolyn then." Another pause and then another laugh, "Don't worry, I have plans for tonight, she definitely won't be alone." One more pause and then he's shaking his head, "Sounds good. I promise, I'll bring your baby girl up there soon. Tell Mr. Hunter I can't wait to meet him."

My hands are shaking when Embry gives the phone back to me, "Mom?"

"Don't worry, Daddy isn't coming down tonight. I know your friend Rachel's wedding is tomorrow, but your father and I would like to take you and Embry out to dinner some time next week. I've started trying to prep your father, but you know how he is; he isn't happy that you are dating a man he hasn't met yet."

Worrying my lip I whisper out, "You haven't told him..."

"I've only told him you two are dating." Sighing in relief I relax back against Embry. Of course, Mom won't let me off that easily, "Don't sound so relieved, he's going to grill you two. You might want to get some answers together before then."

Glancing back at Embry I cringe, "Right." _Answers? I don't have answers. I just have a lot of questions, a few maybe's, and one really big hope._

"It won't be that bad, sweetie." This doesn't help but I don't have the heart to tell my mom that. "Oh, your birthday present should arrive today. I hope you like it. Call me when you open it."

"I will, Mom, thanks. I love you." We say our goodbye's and I'm finally free. Turning quickly to Embry I start panicking, "What did she say to you? When are we having dinner with my parents? What are we going to tell my dad?"

Embry pulls me into his lap and holds me tight against his chest, rocking me back and forth, similar to how I held Eli last weekend. I'm guessing he really can feel my heartbeat, because once it slows to a more regular tempo he starts speaking, "She convinced your dad not to come down here tonight because of Rachel's wedding, so she wanted to make sure you wouldn't be alone for your birthday. She also told me that your father wants us to meet them in Port Angeles for dinner one night next week, to celebrate your birthday."

"Are you ok with that?" I want him to meet my father, but I'm nervous. While I don't think Embry will hate time with my parents like Carter did, I still worry about him having to meet my dad. _What if my dad asks him his intentions with me? _I_ don't even know Embry's intentions with me._

Embry chuckles, his hand lifting my chin until I see his beautiful brown eyes. He looks happy and relaxed as he speaks, "I'm completely ok with meeting your parents for dinner. What did your mom say that freaked you out so much?"

"She said Daddy plans to grill us and that we might want to prepare our answers for him before dinner," I speak slowly, not wanting to look at him as I say this but he's still holding my chin.

His eyes dart away for a second and I'm suddenly struck again that he's not telling me everything. Before I can start panicking, though, he's back smiling again, "How about we survive the wedding tomorrow and then we'll work on what to tell your dad?"

"Yeah," my head falls back to his shoulder.

Embry pulls me off of his lap, sitting me next to him. Before I can even frown he's kissing my cheek, "Would you like your birthday present?"

He seems so excited that I can't deny him, nodding happily. He climbs out of the bed and grabs his jeans. I see his hand move to the back pocket and pause before he looks over his shoulder at me. There is a look on his face I've never seen before, but before I can ask him about it, it's gone. _What is going on? _He turns back, his hand moving to the front pocket of his jeans before telling me to close my eyes.

Complying, I shut my eyes. I'm surprised the gift he bought me would fit in the front pocket of his jeans. That means he had it on him last night and I don't even remember feeling anything in his pocket. Whatever it is, it must be tiny.

Thinking about last night has me smiling like a fool again. As sad as I am that Angela is moving out, Embry's suggestion of him moving in thrills me beyond belief. _Definitely something I don't want to mention to Daddy._

I feel Embry's strong arms wrap around me, pulling me so that my back is to him. Then I feel his hands sliding over my shoulders, collecting my hair and twisting it up. His other hand grabs mine and places it on top of his on my hair, "Mind holding that?"

My heart is doing double time as I realize what is going on just seconds before I feel cool metal against my neck and collarbone. I feel Embry's hands close the clasp on the necklace just before he picks me up, instructing me to keep my eyes closed as he carries me into the bathroom. He sets me down on the floor, not saying anything, just holding me until he finally tells me I can open my eyes. The first thing I see in the reflection is Embry's eyes on me. His face is clear of emotion but I can feel his heart pounding against my back. I grasp one of his hands as I slowly look down to my neck in the mirror.

What I see surprises me. My mom would have bought something large and ornate, but the necklace Embry placed on my neck is simple. My free hand slides over it as I squeeze Embry's hand, "It's beautiful."

I lean in closer to the mirror, realizing it's a small silver locket with a script "L" engraved on the front. Leaning back again I glance up at Embry only to find he's looking at the necklace. Turning around in his arms I catch his eye, smiling happily at him, "You really didn't have to buy me anything, but I love it. Thank you."

"You sure? I know it's nothing fancy, but-," moving my hand to his lips I cut him off.

Once he's stopped talking, I remove my hand to kiss him softly, "I'm sure. It's perfect."

Embry finally relaxes, lifting me to sit on the vanity as he steps between my legs. My legs naturally circle his hips as his mouth finds mine. Our kiss is slow, and even though I know I should be getting ready for school I can't think about that as I enjoy kissing my boyfriend on my birthday.

-0-

Embry insists on making me a special breakfast of french toast and bacon before I can leave for school. Since I normally don't eat much for breakfast, it's heavenly, definitely a birthday treat.

Even with breakfast, Embry still gets me out of the house on time. Rachel is bouncing up and down when I walk into my classroom, "It's your birthday! It's Halloween! I'm getting married tomorrow!"

"I'm pretty sure the last one is the most important," hugging her as I laugh, I can't help but be excited for her.

Rachel leans against the front of my desk, shaking her head, "Nope, tomorrow my getting married will be most important. Today, your birthday is most important."

Once I set my books and purse down I move to lean against the desk next to Rachel, "I have to tell you, so far, this is the best birthday ever."

"Really? Any particular wolf? I mean, reason?" she winks at me and I know that was not an accidental slip.

"He gave me my birthday present already," I point at the necklace.

Rachel nods approvingly then wiggles her eyebrows, "Did he 'give' you anything else this morning? Like his love sausage."

The bell rings as the fire moves over my cheeks. Rachel cackles like a wicked witch as she leaves my room, making me promise to let her treat me to lunch at the diner today. I'm certain that is a bad idea, but there is no stopping her. _She's crazy but she really is my best friend, well my best girlfriend. _

-0-

Pulling the Acura into the garage, I take a moment to breath as the garage door closes behind me. Today has been amazing; touching the necklace around my neck I can feel a smile spread across my face. Walking into the kitchen I'm trying to convince myself I should go for a run when I see a smiling Embry standing in the doorway to the kitchen.

"Hey! What are you doing here?"

Embry meets me halfway across the kitchen, pulling me into his arms, "Jacob told me to skip patrols this afternoon since it's your birthday."

"Remind me to thank Jacob," kissing him happily I lean into his arms.

We kiss slowly, Embry's tongue sliding softly against mine. Before we can go any further, he pulls back slightly, "You have a package from your mom." He laughs when I groan unintentionally, "That good?"

"I'm sure it's beautiful, but Mom always goes over the top," not quite ready to release him, I rest my head against his chest.

I can feel his laughter as he speaks, "I'm sure she just wants you to have the best."

"There is a huge difference between wanting the best and what my mom usually buys." Rolling my eyes as I move to the entryway, I grab the package, returning to the kitchen. Before I can even open the box I'm groaning, "Oh God."

"What?" Embry's arms circle me as I start to open the box.

"It's from Coach."

Opening the box I find a grey wool coat nestled in soft tissue paper. There is a Coach card signed by my mother, "Happy birthday baby girl, I thought this coat would match your eyes. A nice, simple coat. Love, Mom"

Shaking my head I pull the coat out, "Simple? Nothing from Coach is simple, Mom."

"Baby, you know she isn't here, right?" I turn to find Embry with an eyebrow raised, "What's the big deal?"

"I know she isn't here." Grabbing the tag on the coat I show it to him. I see his eyes go wide as he looks up at me, "Yeah, that's the big deal. A nine hundred dollar coat is nice, but it is not simple."

"Did you ask for that?" Embry's voice is soft as he points at the jacket.

Placing the coat back in the box I turn back around to look at him pointedly, speaking slowly, "No, I told Mom I didn't want anything."

"Just double checking," Embry laughs as he lifts his hands in defense.

Sighing I wrap my arms around his waist, "I'm sorry. I'm not mad at you, I just hate how over-the-top she goes."

"She's your Mom." Embry kisses the top of my head when I lean back, "It's her job to go over-the-top for you. Wouldn't you go over the top for your daughter or son?"

That little flutter in my heart is back. I don't want to keep pushing it down, but I know I need to. Even if Embry does want to have kids some day, most likely it won't be with me and I need to come to terms with that. However, I know he's right. I'd give my children anything they asked for, within reason. Unfortunately, to my mom, nine hundred dollars for a coat is "within reason".

"I guess." Sighing I reach for my phone. Mom picks up before the phone even has a chance to ring. She sounds so excited when I thank her for the coat that I don't have the heart to tell her she went overboard. Thankfully, she doesn't keep me on the phone long since she knows Embry is here.

Checking the time when I hang up I realize Rachel will be here shortly with my Halloween costume. Looking up at Embry I pout, which makes him laugh, "What?"

"Rachel is-," I'm cut off by the door bell ringing. Kissing him quickly I frown, "Rachel is here."

I can hear Embry laughing behind me as I run to the door. Swinging it open wide, Rachel bounces in, obviously excited. She's also already dressed up, wearing a Forks High School cheerleading uniform. Before I can say anything, she grabs my arm, "Come on, time to get you ready."

She drags me into the bedroom, talking non-stop while she curls my hair and applies make-up. When she finally lets me out of the bathroom, I realize an hour has passed and it's now nearly six, "Oh my gosh, the trick-or-treater's will be arriving soon!"

"Then we'd better hurry up and get you dressed. Pull off your clothes and close your eyes," Rachel grins happily.

"What? Why?" I narrow my eyes at Rachel.

"Because this is a surprise! Now stop complaining and hurry up."

Pulling off my shirt and pants I grumble, "I don't know why this had to be a surprise, and why are you even here? Shouldn't you be rehearsing for your wedding tomorrow?"

"Close your eyes," Rachel says, not moving until I do so. Once I close my eyes I feel her pulling what I assume is a dress over me. She starts speaking again as she ties something around my neck, "No need to rehearse, it's not like there will be a lot to our ceremony; besides, as long as in the end I'm married to Paul, it doesn't matter if you walk down the aisle too fast or too slow."

My eyes pop open at these words, "Embry and I aren't walking down together?"

"Close!" Rachel growls and I do so. She starts speaking as she puts some sort of knee highs and shoes on me, "No, the guys will be waiting for all of us. Claire and Eli will walk down first then you'll walk out after Emily and Kim with Ness following you."

Rachel takes my hand and leads me out of the bedroom. I keep my eyes closed until she finally tells me I can open them. I open my eyes slowly, afraid of what I'll see, then nearly jump when I hear screams of, "SURPRISE!"

All around the living room I see pack members and imprintees; they are all grinning, no doubt proud of themselves for pulling this off. My mouth is hanging open, I'm so shocked to see them all that I don't bother with looking down at the costume Rachel put me in. My eyes travel around to each face, completely full of shock that they would do this for me. _Surely they had plans for the night?_ Rachel goes bouncing over to Paul and wraps her arms around his waist; she and Paul smile at me and he speaks up. "Happy birthday, Lillah."

My face flushes with all of the attention I'm getting and I mutter a quiet, "Thank you," to Paul before glancing next to him. Ness is standing with Jacob just behind her. He is smiling at me but he looks extremely tense; then I notice Ness' costume and I stifle a giggle. She's wearing a short plaid skirt, white thigh highs, extremely high heels and a tight cardigan. Her beautiful copper curls are pulled into low pigtails. When Ness sees the smirk on my face she grins at me knowingly. Movement catches my eye and I look to my left to see Embry stepping toward me, an intense look on his face.

"Happy birthday, baby," he whispers and pulls me into his arms as soon as he reaches me. I wrap my arms around him, twisting my fingers in his hair as I bury my face in the side of his neck. Kissing him lightly I allow one of my hands to run down his spine. I feel him shiver against me but he doesn't say anything.

"Thank you, Embry," I tell him as I pull my mouth away from his skin. There's so much I'd like to say to him right now but I can't; not in a room full of our friends. Reluctantly I release him, and take a step away but I don't make it far because he keeps his hands on my hips.

I turn to look at everyone, meeting all of their stares again. "Thank you, so much. I don't know what to say. You have no idea how happy I am to have all of you here. I'm amazed that each of you would take the time to be here for me."

"Lillah, of course we would want to celebrate your birthday with you; you're family now," Emily speaks up and I smile over at her, my eyes a little misty.

"I'm a very lucky lady," I tell her and Embry is forced to release me when Emily and I embrace. I feel someone grab my legs with force and I look down to see Claire's sunny face. Emily steps back and I squat down so I'm eye level with Claire.

"Happy biiiiirthday, Miss Lillah," Claire sing-songs, making me grin madly. I pull her into a tight hug before holding her out at arms length again.

"Thank you, Claire. I'm so happy you were able to make it to my party," I tell her all adult-like. "You look very pretty in your costume, by the way." Claire beams at me and spins in a circle, her golden dress swirling around her.

"Guess who I am, Miss Lillah. GUESS!" Claire is so excited that I pretend to struggle with the answer, throwing out all sorts of wrong answers so that she can tell me herself. After a few wrong answers she sighs in exasperation and says, "I'm BELLE, Miss Lillah. From 'Beauty and the Beast'. Did you see my Quily?" She is so excited that her words tumble over one another. I look up behind her as she turns to look too and I see a rather large furry thing hanging back behind the crowd. _The Beast. _It's all I can do not to burst out laughing. _He really will do _anything_ for her_.

"He looks very nice, Claire," I tell her with, what I'm proud to say, is a straight face.

As I stand up Embry wraps his arms around me and drops his forehead down on top of my head. I can feel his body shaking with laughter. Quil won't be able to live this one down for a while but I feel like I need to help him out. Turning around in Embry's arms I give him my best serious look, "Be nice, he dressed up for her." Leaning back I take in what Embry is wearing, not surprised to see it's exactly what he had on earlier; his normal jeans and a t-shirt. Narrowing my eyes I continue, "Besides, I don't see you dressing up to match," pausing, realizing I still don't know what costume Rachel put me in, "whatever I am."

"I'm dressed up to match you!" Embry leans his head back and howls loudly.

Just like before, the sound melts me, sending a thrill of excitement down my spine. After he stops it takes me a few minutes to calm down enough to speak, "What does howling have to do with my costume?"

"I'm the big, bad wolf."

Embry spins me around so I can look at myself in the mirror in the entryway. Looking both in the mirror and down my body, I realize I'm wearing black heels, white knee high stockings, a red and white checkered skirt, a white gypsy top with a black corset around my waist, and a red cape with a hood tied around my neck. Shaking my head I look back at Embry, "She didn't?"

"Of course I did! We've all dressed up as Little Red Riding Hood over the years, it's your turn with your big, bad wolf," Rachel giggles as she and Paul, who is dressed up as a Forks High School football player, walk past. "Now hurry up, Emily is ready to cut the cake!"

Embry takes my hand but before we can take a step, Sam stops in front of us, "Emily made her chocolate cake. Lillah, you must be pretty special to get it twice."

"Oh, she did? I can't wait," licking my lips excitedly I start to pull Embry into the kitchen. He raises an eyebrow at me, I guess surprised by my reaction, "Calories don't count on my birthday. Besides, that cake is to die for." Winking at him I pull again, giggling happily when he finally starts moving.

Sam walks ahead of us, turning back to grin at me, whispering loudly, "I had a preview of the cake earlier, it really is to die for."

When I step into the kitchen, all the lights are out except the birthday candles on top of Emily's chocolate cake. I can just make out all the smiling faces before they start singing "Happy Birthday" to me. Embry holds me tight and I can hear him singing next to my ear. I'm so happy I want to cry; no one has ever done this for me before, and I've never had this close of friends in my life. This truly has been an amazing birthday, all because of Embry.

When everyone stops singing they clap and cheer, and I can just barely hear Embry behind me, "Happy birthday, baby, make a wish."

Stepping out of his arms I walk over to the cake on the table. Leaning forward to blow out the candles, there is only one wish on my heart that I can ask for. _Please, somehow, let me be able to be with Embry like this forever._ Closing my eyes, I blow out the candles; when I open my eyes, I'm surprised to see all twenty-two candles out. My heart jumps with just the slightest hope that maybe my birthday wish could come true.

The lights come on and Emily skips over to the table, hugging me tightly, "Happy birthday, Lillah! Now, how much cake."

"I'll take a slice this big," holding my arms wide I imitate Rachel's request from the last time we had chocolate cake.

I can hear Rachel and Kim behind me laughing as I watch Emily nod, "Very well, you're the birthday girl!"

"I'm kidding!" I reach for Emily before she cuts a huge piece of cake.

Embry shouts across the kitchen, "No she isn't Emily, I'll eat whatever she doesn't, fill her plate up with cake!"

"We'll compromise," Emily cuts a much bigger piece than I would ever dream of eating and places it on one of my dinner plates. Even with "compromising" it still takes up over half of the plate. Emily hands it to me, but pauses when she looks down at my neck. Her eyes go wide for the briefest of seconds and I see her glance over my shoulder quickly. I don't need to turn around to know she's looking at Embry. Her face lights up again when she looks back at me, nodding her head toward my neck, "That's a beautiful necklace."

"Thanks," my hand automatically moves to my neck. I don't know why but her reaction scares me just a little bit, "Embry gave it to me this morning- as a birthday present."

"You are a very lucky birthday girl, then," Emily winks at me before returning to cutting slices of the cake.

The doorbell ringing cuts me off before Emily and I can talk any more. I see Embry running toward the front but I'm excited to see the trick-or-treater's too; setting the cake on the table I follow him out to the front door. I'm surprised to see Embry's hands shaking when I walk up, but I quickly understand the situation when I see Bruce and his best friend, Brian, standing on the front porch.

"Hey! Ms. Hunter, we were just asking if you were around but this oaf wouldn't let us in," Bruce gives me a sly smile that reminds me too much of Carter.

Smiling sweetly I step in front of Embry, grabbing the candy bowl, "Happy Halloween boys, but it doesn't look like you are dressed up. No costume, no candy. Sorry."

"Oh, we're dressed up. We're two hot vampires, see our fangs," Brian opens his mouth to show a pair of fake plastic teeth.

"What's he dressed up as?" Bruce points at Embry.

Glancing back at Embry I wink when he wraps his arms around me protectively, "He's my big, bad, wolf."

"I don't like vampires," Embry growls low.

Biting back my laugh I hand both of the boys a piece of candy, "Have a good evening, boys. Be safe."

I'm turning to close the door when I hear Brian speak again, "Hey, Ms. Hunter. We'll be at the diner later, if you want to ditch the guard dog."

Embry pulls me back from the door, growling out to the boys, "Ms. Hunter will be with me later, she's busy, forever. Oh, and she's mine, so back off."

He slams the door before turning back to me. I can see his whole body shaking, so I don't say anything right away. When he finally calms down he gives me a guilty smile, "Sorry."

"Embry, that really wasn't necessary," I explain, trying not to get angry with him.

"I know," he steps forward, pulling me into his arms. "It's just, the way they were looking at you, and talking to you, I didn't like it."

"How many times do I have to tell you they are just boys?" Narrowing my eyes at him I take a step back, "I know they provoked you, but Embry, we're the adults."

"Lillah, they asked their teacher to come out with them later, that's pretty ballsy," his hands are shaking again but I do my best to ignore it.

Needing him to understand I do my best to explain, "Embry, I know they asked me out. If you would have let me handle it, I would have politely turned them down and closed the door. Without basically telling them you are living here."

Embry's face suddenly falls, "Is there a reason why you wouldn't want them to know that?"

Shaking my head I quickly wrap my arms around him again, "Em, you are misunderstanding me; it's none of their business what goes on in my life once I leave school. I need to always be their teacher, or else I won't be able to control them in the classroom." Looking up at him I grin, "As much as I enjoy hearing you call me 'yours', you silly, possessive, wolf, they don't _need_ to know that."

I can feel his chest sink as he exhales, "I still don't like it. I don't like how they talk about you, talk to you, look at you; it's not right, Lills."

A throat clearing interrupts us, "Emily sent me to check on you two, everything ok?"

Looking up at Embry, I don't say anything, letting him decide if everything really is ok. Finally he nods once, kisses me then turns to Sam, "Yeah, everything's fine. Just some teenagers acting up."

"I'd kill any teenagers that dared to look at Emily," Sam growls as he turns back to the kitchen.

"What is it with you guys?" Laughing I follow Embry back toward the kitchen.

"What did you call me before?" He stops just before the kitchen, kissing me in between his words, "Silly. Possessive. Wolf."

"Uh huh. Now come on, there is chocolate cake waiting for us!" Pulling him we walk back into the kitchen. The guys all ask what took so long, insinuating that Embry was giving me a little "treat", while the girls roll their eyes.

Quil stands up a few minutes later, announcing that he is taking Claire out trick-or-treating in the neighborhood. Emily and Sam stand as well and I giggle when I realize they are dressed up like a couple from the fifties; her hair is in a ponytail and she's wearing a poodle skirt while his hair is slicked back and he's wearing black jeans and a white t-shirt.

Emily turns to Kim and I can't contain my laughter when I see her pick up Eli, who is dressed up as the Incredible Hulk, "Oh my gosh! With all of the action before I didn't even see him!"

Emily stops before walking out of the kitchen, showing Eli off, who is snuggled up in the one piece costume that completely covers his legs. He even has a little hat on, "You are too precious little guy!"

Eli giggles and claps as Emily rolls her eyes, "He's such a ham. We'll be back in a little bit. Don't let them finish off the cake without us."

After they walk out, Rachel grabs my attention by discussing the wedding the next day. I ask about her sister joining but she says the tickets were just too expensive for her fly up. This makes me sad for Rachel; even though Jacob and Billy are going to be a part of her wedding, I can't imagine her twin sister missing this moment in her life. Rachel, however, seems to dismiss it, explaining the plans for tomorrow instead. We are all to meet at Rachel's house for lunch and to get ready. The guys are going to meet at the beach at dawn to start setting up for the wedding then go to Sam's to get ready. I frown at Embry but he just shrugs, apparently accustomed to the odd hours.

The doorbell rings again and I happily jump up to go answer it. I'm enjoying seeing all of the costumes as they come up, handing out more candy than I normal would, since I know Embry picked up so much.

I'm about to close the door when I see a couple walking up. It isn't until they are on the porch that I realize it's Seth and Leah. Seth walks up, easily pulling me into a hug, "Happy birthday, Lillah. Sorry we missed the surprise. Leah here took forever getting ready."

Leah doesn't respond, just gives me a quick wave, "Happy birthday. I heard something about chocolate cake."

My confidence takes a sudden nose dive when I see her outfit once she's in the light. She's wearing a skin tight, vinyl, all black costume, including black stilettos. _Catwoman, I guess._ With the heels she's well over six feel tall and all leg. I swear her legs come up to my chin.

Still slightly uncomfortable around her, I invite them in, leading the way into the kitchen. Everyone welcomes them, though I notice that Ness doesn't quite meet Seth's eyes then she casts a look in Leah's direction.

Embry offers me a bite of cake but I turn it down, which seems to upset him, "What happened to calories don't count on your birthday."

Not wanting to say anything, I tilt my head toward Leah. Kim leans over, whispering to me, "Try being pregnant around her. I'm not even showing and I feel fat and ugly in comparison."

"Are you two kidding me?" Embry roars just as Jared growls, "Kim, you know better."

Leah laughs which makes me blush, I can feel the heat rising on my cheeks as she speaks, "Please you two. I'd give anything to be small like you, Lillah. You are like this perfect woman. Have you ever tried to find size eleven shoes in Forks? They don't exist. Kim, you're pregnant. Enjoy what it does to your body, because I'll never get to experience that. I can't get pregnant, remember?" She flops down at the table, crossing one vinyl clad leg over the other while taking a huge bite of chocolate cake, "No one absolutely loves their body."

"I love Lillah's body," Embry announces, making the other guys chuckle.

Burying my head under his chin I whisper, "Thank you, baby." Feeling a little bad that I might have offended Leah I turn back to her, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you."

"I'm accustomed to women hating me," Leah shrugs, shoving more cake in her mouth.

Rachel, Kim, and I all speak at the same time, "I don't hate you."

Everyone starts laughing and that seems to relax the tension, except for Ness, who keeps glancing between Jacob and Leah. When conversations start up again I turn to Leah, "I really don't hate you, it's just, you look like a runway model, and-," cutting myself off I glance back at Embry. He's frowning but I shake my head before continuing, "You used to patrol with my boyfriend. He's seen you naked. You've seen him naked."

Leah nearly chokes on her bite of cake, "Oh God! You don't actually think I'd have sex with Embry? I can do _so_ much better than him!"

"Hey!" Embry growls, which makes me giggle.

"Trust me, Lillah, nothing happened with Embry. Though I do miss patrolling with him." She glances over her shoulder at Seth, who, I notice, keeps trying to grab Ness' attention. "I swear my brother never shuts up."

"I heard that Leah," Seth grumbles.

Leah rolls her eyes, "I know you did, Seth, that's why I said it."

The boisterous group returns to their conversations, now including Seth and Leah. The doorbell rings a few more times and I hop up to give out candy. The last doorbell ring is Claire and Eli. As I open the door, Claire shouts, "Trick or treat, Miss Lillah!"

"I'll definitely give the beauty and her beast a treat." I toss a couple of pieces of candy in Claire and Eli's buckets and then hand the bowl to Quil, "You deserve the rest of the candy for the best costume."

Quil grins as they all walk back in, "Sweet, thanks Cuz!"

I turn off the porch light then run to my bedroom to grab my camera; I want pictures of my best birthday ever. I return to the kitchen and my face breaks out into a smile as I see all of my friends packed into the room. I take a few candid pictures of the couples and kids then return to sitting on Embry's lap. Kim takes the camera from my hand and insists on taking a few pictures of Embry and I. As much as I hate having my picture taken, there is something special about documenting my time with Embry. Once Kim finishes and gives the camera back to me, Claire comes bouncing over to us, "Are you ready to open presents, Miss Lillah?"

"Presents? You didn't have to!" Claire hands me a piece of paper that is folded up with a bow drawn on the front. When I open the piece of paper up I find a hand drawn picture of a stick woman with red hair and a stick man with black hair standing in a pink room with butterflies on the wall.

"It's you and Uncle Bry in the pretty room," she giggles as I hug her before standing to place it on the front of the refrigerator. Claire beams with pride when she sees what I've done with her gift.

I take a seat back in Embry's lap to find more presents in front of me. I am overwhelmed by their generosity and love. Opening the present from Emily, Sam, and Eli I find a necklace; Emily explains that it is from the local Quileute jeweler. Jared and Kim's present turns out to be a matching bracelet, Paul and Rachel hand me a small package and it contains matching earrings. Ness places a small bag in front of me, apologizing that she wasn't exactly in on the "matching" plan. However, when I open the bag I find a beautiful skirt inside that would match the jewelry perfectly. "Ness, where did this come from?" I ask, glancing at the tag, not recognizing the name, but feeling like I should.

"My Aunt Alice picked it up in Paris last fall. She said I could have it, but I thought it looked more like something you would wear," Ness explains. I'm shocked, suddenly realizing this is a couture skirt from one of the biggest French designers in history.

"Ness, I can't take this," I whisper.

"Take it, please. Otherwise, it will just sit in Aunt Alice's closet, or she'll force me to wear it. You are saving me by taking it." Ness grins, and I'm unable to tell her no.

"Fine, but only because I don't want you to be _forced_ into wearing anything." She grins at me happily.

Jacob smiles at me, "My present was letting your boyfriend off of patrols today and for the weekend."

"No patrols for the weekend?" Unable to contain my squeal I jump up, running to quickly hug Jacob, "Thank you!" Kissing his cheek I giggle as I run back to Embry.

"Hey, Embry, I'll take your patrols for the next month if Lillah will kiss me like that!" Quil laughs as snuggle back up in Embry's lap.

Looking up at Embry I smile, "No patrols for the next month? That's pretty tempting..."

"Not worth it," Embry growls. "Besides," he moves his head toward Claire, "I don't think she likes that plan."

Glancing over, I see Claire with her little hands on her hips, giving Quil a "behave yourself" look. I almost feel bad for Quil, she is going to be a handful when she grows up. _I hope I'm around to watch._

The party starts to wind down as the guys announce they need to get going because of the early morning that's coming. Everyone gives me a hug as they leave, which makes me feel even more appreciative of being a part of this special group.

As Emily is heading out, she asks if I have any pearls she can borrow tomorrow. "Sure," nodding I remember my grandmother's pearls she gave me at my high school graduation.

"You aren't planning to wear them tomorrow, are you?"

Shaking my head I point to my necklace, "No, I was going to wear this. You're welcome to borrow them."

"That would be great, do you mind stopping by my house before you go over to Rachel's? That way Sam and I don't have two cars to take home after the wedding."

"Not a problem, I'll see you in the morning," hugging her I can't contain my excitement. "This is going to be such a great day!"

Once the house is clear, Embry takes my hand, locking the door then turning to the bedroom, "Come on birthday girl, I have one more present for you."

"What's that?" I ask as I follow Embry.

Opening the door to the bathroom I find the lights out but candles all over the room. Embry moves to the bathtub, turning on the water before looking back at me, "I figure I still owe you a bath."

Giggling remembering the last time I was in a bath, I feel my face darkening as I speak, "I think you do, but only if you join me."

"It might be a tight squeeze in the tub," Embry says as he approaches me slowly.

"I think we can manage," I whisper as I sink into his arms. "Thank you, for everything today, Em. You made this my best birthday ever."

"Really?" Embry chuckles, "Now I have to come up with a way to top it next year."

My heart pounds at the mention of the future. The idea that Embry would even consider my birthday next year makes me so excited and just a tiny bit hopeful that maybe, just maybe, we have a chance for a future together. For tonight, I'm going to pretend we do and enjoy the rest of my birthday with the man I love.

-0-

I knock on Emily and Sam's front door first thing the next morning; I'm bouncing excitedly, anticipating the day ahead. When Emily flings the front door open her face mirrors the look I'm sure is on mine- a beaming smile and dancing eyes. "Hi!" We both giggle when we speak at the same time. Emily pulls me in for a hug before I follow her into the house.

While I wait patiently for Emily to grab her things I take a seat on an antique rocking chair that is placed in the corner of her and Sam's bedroom. "I feel like I'm forgetting something," Emily tells me absently as she places her shoes in a tote bag.

"I hate that feeling, you need me to help with anything?" I ask her, watching as she pauses in thought.

"No, I really think I've got it all. I'm just always thinking I've forgotten the important things when the family is doing something together; Eli's bottles, Claire's stuffed wolf 'Quily'. Thank goodness Sam is great about taking care of his own things." She smiles up at me and I can see that she loves being the care taker of her little family. Her face always has a glow about it when she mentions them. "Now, before we load up and head out, I want to talk about Embry's birthday gift to you."

Hearing her words makes me a little nervous and I glance down at the necklace that rests against my chest. "Emily, have you seen this before? Last night when you noticed it I could have sworn you'd seen a ghost."

Emily walks around and sits on the side of the bed closest to me and looks me dead in the eye. "Not a ghost, just a memory of someone very much loved."

"What do you mean, Emily? I'm a little worried here," I confess nervously and Emily motions for me to move over to sit next to her.

"I'm sorry, I don't mean to scare you. It's not anything bad, but, well- this is kind of a big deal."

"What's going on?" I speak hesitantly, still unsure, despite Emily's assurances. Sitting on the bed I try to relax.

Emily turns to face me, "What did Embry tell you when he gave you the necklace?"

Thinking back to yesterday morning I try to remember our conversation. "Nothing," I whisper, as I realize how briefly we talked about the gift. "He put it on me and I thanked him. He didn't say anything about the necklace, other than it wasn't anything 'fancy'."

"Lillah, did he mention where he got the necklace?" Emily presses further.

Shaking my head in the negative I look her in the eye, "No. I told him he didn't have to buy me anything. Emily, what is going on?"

"Have you opened the locket?" Apparently Emily isn't going to tell me just yet.

"No," I sigh, frustrated, "why would I open it? There's nothing in there."

"I'm not so sure about that." Emily lifts her hand, "Do you mind if I open the locket, just to double check something? I just want to be sure before I tell you this."

Not wanting to be rude, I agree offering to take the necklace off, but she tells me there isn't a need. I feel her open the locket and then swiftly close it. She leans back again and sighs, "That boy. I don't know whether to hug him for finally doing something bold or slap him for not telling you."

"What isn't he telling me? Emily, what is going on?" I ask again. I also want to ask her if Embry is keeping secrets from me, but I don't think I can handle the truth today.

Emily sighs, "Lillah, Embry didn't buy this necklace. There are names engraved on the inside of the locket."

"Names?" Now I'm really confused. If he didn't buy the necklace, then where did it come from, and how did he get it?

Emily nods her head, "There is one name on each side of the locket. One is Nayeli. The other is Embry."

My hand flies to the locket, my finger sliding easily over the "L" on the front as my heart speeds up, "Why does this locket have Embry and his mom's names on the inside?"

"Because it was Nayeli's necklace, the 'L' stood for her nickname, Lee. She was named after her grandmother but was given the nickname soon after she was born," Emily speaks softly, slowly, like she's trying to explain something obvious to an idiot. Only in this case, _I'm_ the idiot.

Taking shallow breaths I whisper, "Embry gave me his mom's necklace?" Emily nods. I try to think through all this but the only thing I can say is, "Why?"

"Because you are very special to him." Emily pauses, like she's trying to decide what to tell me. Wringing her hands, she continues, "Lillah, I know it seems like everyone knows everyone's business in our little family, but we are good at keeping secrets when needed. Embry knows I went to talk to his mom a few times over the years, but he doesn't know how close Lee and I became. She knew Embry was spending a lot of time at my house, so she wanted to get to know me to make sure her son was taken care of. When she found out she was so sick, she told me a few very important things she didn't want to take with her to the grave. One of those was about this necklace.

"She told me that she gave the necklace to Embry. If he were ever to give it to a woman she instructed me to give that woman a letter. Embry doesn't know about this letter, and I've never read it. I have it here if you would like to read it." Emily pauses, looking more serious than I think I've ever seen her, "Lillah, one thing I can tell you for sure; for Embry to give you his mother's necklace is huge. He wouldn't have made that decision on a whim. He wanted you to have it for a reason."

I look down at the necklace that I haven't removed since Embry put it around my neck. It's resting in the palm of my hand, feeling heavy with implication after hearing Emily's words. "Would you like the letter now? I know in my heart that Lee would have wanted you to read it, Lillah." she places her hand on mine and I look up at her; I'm amazed at this new bit of information and my mind is reeling. I slowly nod my head before I realize what I'm doing. Emily is off of the bed and unlocking a small drawer in the night stand before I can think.

"I'm going to check on the kids and make sure they are all set. Take as much time as you need. Just come on out to the living room when you are ready," Emily tells me before hugging me lightly and closing the door behind her.

I sit and stare at the envelope in my hand. _What is happening to my life?_ Yesterday this necklace was just a simple birthday gift from my boyfriend, now I'm holding a letter from his mom- _to me?_ It all seems so fast, but everything is going in slow motion at the same time.

As much as I want to know what Embry's mom wrote, I'm afraid to open the letter. Somehow I feel this is important and will change a lot of things in my relationship with Embry. I'm not ready for the change, I want more time with him; before I have to let him go permanently. _But what if it is a good change?_ Maybe his mom knew more than Embry thought, like in that photo of them.

I take a few deep breaths before gently opening the envelope and pulling out the letter. The page is full of a smooth flowing script and I stare at it for a few minutes before beginning to read it.

_My Dear,_

_My name is Nayeli, but everyone calls me Lee. I am Embry's mom. You've been given this note because of Embry. I love my boy and I trust him, but I know he has secrets he has had to keep from me. I have asked Emily only to give this letter to the woman that both knows his secret and that he has picked by giving her my necklace._

_There are things you need to understand about Embry; who he is and why he is afraid to open up. I love my son, but he can be very stubborn._

_First, I don't know Embry's big secret, but I know it is related to his father, to the Quileute tribe. I've never told him about his father. I feel like I should have, but his father was already married with a family when I got pregnant. I'm not proud of the mistakes I made, but when I got pregnant, it was the best thing that ever happened to me. Please, let Embry know, when you can, that his father does know he exists, but I needed to protect Embry._

_Second, Embry isn't dealing well with losing me. I'm so worried that since all his life it's been just the two of us, he won't know what to do once I'm gone. I fear he thinks my cancer is punishment for him having to keep his secret from me. That I am being taken from him, or worse, leaving him, because of that secret. Rationally, I know he doesn't think this, but deep down, he's just a scared little boy that is losing his mother. My only hope is that you can start to heal his heart once I'm gone. Please help him to understand that even when I'm gone, I'll never leave him. I will always love him and be right by his side._

_Third and finally, I've seen recently a lot of his friends pairing off: Sam and Emily, Paul and Rachel, Jared and Kim. I've also seen my son choosing not to look for a serious relationship. He has been very focused on helping take care of me recently, along with his duties to the tribe, and his work. My son is a responsible man, but, as I said, he can be stubborn. I worry that even when he finds the person he is supposed to be with- you, he may still be keeping secrets. You might know the big secret, but there will probably be more he isn't telling you. He might even claim he's trying to protect you. It's bullshit, pardon my French. He might think that's what he's doing, but I would guess deep down he's trying to protect himself; but even he may not realize it._

_Be patient with him, it's going to be a difficult process for him, learning to trust someone with his heart. I know this won't be easy on you either, but he's already made huge steps in the right direction, both by telling you his secret and by giving you my necklace. I know that you are someone very important for him to want you to have a piece of me. If Emily hasn't already explained, my name means "I love you." Embry giving you that necklace is his way of showing what he isn't quite ready to say. Give him time. It will be worth it in the end, the best things in life always are. Once he is able to open up to you his love will be the greatest thing you could ever dream of._

_Above all else, I love my son with everything in me and I'm so very proud of the man he has become, please help him to know that. Good luck my dear, I will be watching both of you and helping as much as I can._

_I love you because my son loves you,_

_Lee  
_  
-0-

I sit and stare at the letter, reading it over again, looking for things I might have missed. I hear Eli squeal in the other room and I glance down at my watch, realizing how long I've made Emily wait. We're late and Rachel is going to have my head; my hands are shaking lightly so I try to calm myself by closing my eyes and taking a deep breath. Once I'm able to focus I gently fold the letter, slipping it back into the envelope before tucking it away in my purse.

Claire squeals my name when she sees me step into the living room. I hug her, then Eli and nod at Emily so she can see I'm ok. We pile into my car for the short and quiet drive over to Rachel's. She's pacing back and forth across the porch when we arrive.

"What the hell took you guys so long? You were suppose to be here over an hour ago!" Rachel runs down the stairs as we climb from the car. Claire leaps out of the backseat and practically attacks Rachel, making us laugh. "You missed lunch."

"Sorry Rach, it's my fault," I tell her without any further explanation. I notice when she opens her mouth to question me Emily shakes her head 'no'. _Thank goodness for Emily._ I'm not ready to discuss any of the new revelations yet and I don't want to overshadow Rachel's big day.

Once we are in the house, Rachel insists we eat before we start getting ready, but I can't. I managed to make myself look calm on the outside, but inside, I'm still thinking about the letter. There are butterflies that intermittently swarm around my stomach and then settle back down. Tearing apart the sandwich in front of me I let my mind wander briefly. _Does he love me? Does it matter that he loves me? We could both be torn apart if he imprints on someone._

"Lillah," Emily speaks softly. Glancing up at her I realize the kids are no longer at the table.

Pushing my plate away I move to stand, apologizing for taking so long, but Emily stops me, pulling me to sit back down. She doesn't say anything right away, letting me think in peace. When she does finally speak, her words are almost my breaking point, "Do you love him?"

Biting down on my lower lip to prevent the tears I quickly shake my head up and down, unable to look at her. She grabs my shoulders and I'm surprised to see her smiling when I look up, blinking rapidly I manage to push back the tears. One must have escaped though because Emily brushes it away softly before speaking, "Only happy tears today." Taking a deep breath, I try to tap down my wayward thoughts and emotions to focus on the day. Once I'm back under control Emily continues, "I'm glad to have you confirm it. Thing is, Lillah, I'm pretty sure he loves you too."

"What if he doesn't?" I manage to whisper out, but then the butterflies take off and I'm feeling nervous again, "Or worse, what if he does love me and then he imprints?"

"I don't think he will, Lillah." Emily speaks softly.

Shaking my head I realize I'm getting worked up again, but I can't calm down this time, "You can't know that, Emily."

"I can't, but I do know what I see. Lillah, Embry only has eyes for you. I know you were drunk when we were out at the bar, but sweetie, women were circling all of the guys at the table. Embry was just as oblivious to those women as the rest of the guys. His eyes never left you." She sighs, her head dropping slightly as she whispers, "Do me a favor, try to remember Embry when you first met him. Even think back to how he acted at the bonfire. Compare that man to the man that proudly wears a piece of _string_ around his finger to show your 'friendship'. Or better yet, compare him to the man that threw you a surprise party last night for your birthday."

I can clearly see Embry that first day in my head. He was angry, but more than that, he was alone. In that room full of people, he sat quietly, letting everyone glare down at him, not saying a word. Knowing now that he was scared for my life and ended up with the entire tribe upset with him because of it hurts my heart. Then on the cliffs the day of the bonfire, he was so angry at me, pulling me back from the cliffs. Only now I know differently, he wasn't angry, he was worried, afraid I would jump, leave him.

My fingers twist my friendship ring, remembering the day he changed it from a bracelet to a ring, so we could "match". That was the day he stood beside me, taking the blame from my mom for something that was no one's fault. Then there was him taking care of me when I was so hungover. Plus last weekend, when he took me up to the cliffs for an impromptu "anniversary" celebration. And finally, last night, pulling all of our friends together to surprise me on my birthday; because of him, I have all of these wonderful friends in my life that I now consider family.

"He's changed," I whisper. Looking up at Emily I speak a little louder, "He's changed so much."

"He has, because of you; you've also changed, Lillah. You've become a strong woman that is confident and stands up for herself, as well as others. Sam told me about what happened last night with your students and Embry. It takes a lot to tell these guys to behave. Sam said he was ready to jump in if needed, but that you handled Embry like a pro. A month ago, you were practically running away from him. You've changed because of him."

Emily stands up, hugging me, "He loves you, so much so that he gave you his mother's necklace; I just think he's afraid to tell you. He's never experienced real love before and the only other person he's ever loved left him abruptly. You might have to pull on some of that new confidence in yourself and tell him first."

My heart feels like it's exploding in my chest it's beating so hard. _Take a chance and tell him first?_ I don't know if I can, but if she's right, I need to. I definitely can't keep holding myself back, I want to tell him how much I love him. As much as I know it will hurt if he leaves or imprints, I don't want to miss enjoying every moment with him right now, and that means I need to be honest with him.

I start to calm down again. Emily smiles, this time looking happy again, "Good. Now that that's settled, let's go get ready before Rachel hurts us."

"As long as she looks beautiful, that's all that matters," I finally manage a smile as I follow Emily through the house.

"I don't know about that, I think the guys are expecting all of us to look beautiful. Which reminds me," Emily pauses in the living room, "did you happen to remember those pearls?"

Grabbing my bag from beside the front door I pull the pearls out of the front pocket, "Yep, these were my Grandmother's."

"Oh, Lillah, I can't wear your Grandmother's pearls," Emily frowns at me, clearly upset at this idea.

"Emily, of course you can use them. You're family now," I whisper, looking down at the pearls in my hands.

Emily pulls me into a hug, "Oh Lillah! You've been part of our family all along. Thank you."

-0-

"Oh my God!" Rachel screams, "I'm getting married!"

Ness, Rachel, Emily, and I all giggle at her as we approach the back of the tent the guys built on the beach for the wedding. Emily is carrying Eli on her hip while Claire's little hand is clasping mine. Jacob is waiting for us, holding back the plastic that surrounds the tent for us to enter. Heat envelopes us as we step onto the rented floor. I'm trying to pay attention to everything around me, I know it is beautiful, but I can't. All I can think about is walking down the aisle and seeing Embry standing there.

"Miss Lillah? Are you ok? You sure are squeezing my hand tight."

I look down at Claire, suddenly releasing her hand as I realize in my anxiety I've been clutching it tightly. Slowly exhaling, I try to smile down at Claire, "Sorry sweetie, just nervous."

Claire smiles but before anything more can be said, Rachel is directing all of us to get in our places. I watch as Claire grabs the handle of a small wagon just as Emily places Eli inside of it. His little hands immediately clutch the sides of it and he looks up at Emily, grinning at her. "Come on, Eli. We gotta take Uncle Paul and Aunt Rachel their rings," Claire says with authority as she begins to pull the wagon, then they turn a corner and are gone. I can just make out the music as Emily also turns to follow them, her bouquet clutched in her hand. Kim turns to look back at me, smiling, then she's off walking the same direction.

I can feel my hands shaking even as I grasp my flowers, hanging on for dear life. I nearly fall forward when I feel a hand against my back pushing me. Turning my head I see Ness, whispering, "Go, Lillah.

Forcing my legs to move I step forward slowly; turning the corner I see just a small aisle to walk down with Billy at the end, smiling. The sun is setting behind him and there is a cool breeze off the ocean. There is a canopy above us to keep out any rain, but otherwise, it's open to the ocean. There are a few chairs set up on each side of the carpeting, each filled with a smiling face looking at me as I walk forward. I can see Claire sitting on Quil's lap and she waves at me. Eli is sitting on Sue's lap, with a man I've never seen seated next to her. Sue winks at me and I barely manage a small nervous grin.

Forcing my eyes away from Sue I look forward. My eyes are drawn to Embry immediately and my mind starts churning out bits and pieces of the letter from Nayeli. _What if it's true, all the things she said? What if Embry does love me?_ My feet shuffle forward across the carpet as I'm stuck by a thought. _What if he's afraid I won't want a life with him?_ I pause, frown a little, looking away from Embry. _How could he think that? Haven't I proven myself by being with him; by wanting him to move in with me? He should know I wouldn't take that lightly. I love him; maybe it is time to push my fear aside and tell him? _Seeing Kim turn to the left just in front of me to stand next to Emily I realize I've been completely focused on my thoughts and not the wedding. Following Kim's lead, I move to stand beside her. Now that I've stopped I'm unable to avoid looking at Embry again.

My eyes automatically lock on him, but I can't make sense of what is going on. Jared has his arm out to prevent Embry from moving forward, while Jacob has a firm grip on Embry's arm. Looking up into his eyes I'm shocked by what I see. Embry is looking straight at me but he has a wild look on his face. My heart starts pounding; I want to run to him but I know Rachel will kill me for causing a scene and ruining her wedding. Instead I try to relax him with my eyes, keeping mine locked on his and not daring to look away. I try to convey to him how I feel but I'm afraid it won't work. Finally I see him drop his shoulders, closing his eyes for the briefest of seconds before giving me a tight smile and mouthing, "You ok?"

Managing to nod my head I try to smile at him reassuringly. When I hear the wedding march begin to play I can't drag my eyes away from the strong pull of Embry's; his eyes stay locked on mine, dark and intense, not releasing me. As badly as I want to look at Rachel, to watch her walk down the aisle, I can't. There is something so different in Embry's eyes that for a time it makes me forget about the letter that is buried in my purse. Thinking about it now I reach up and finger the necklace that belonged to his mother.

When Embry sees the movement he glances down, following my hand and his eyes soften. I run my finger tips over the "L", tracing it several times before gently resting it against my skin once again. Embry's eyes flicker back up to mine just as Rachel steps between us and my attention is finally pulled away to look at her and Paul.

The ceremony itself is beautiful and short; no big frills but full of the love that I know Paul and Rachel share with one another. I glance at Embry a few times and he's moved to the side, pushing Jacob over so that he can see around the bride and groom. I hear Ness giggle lightly and I glance over at her. She shakes her head at the two guys and we share a look of exasperation. Every time I flick my gaze to Embry he's staring at me and I get the impression that he hasn't looked away from me at all. His eyes on me make a shiver move up my spine and I don't think I can take it anymore. I cock my head to the side and nod toward Rachel and Paul as they begin their vows, hoping to pull Embry's attention away from me. Having him stand across from me in this manner has me envisioning it being the two of us in Paul and Rachel's place and my heart clenches.

Billy speaks before the small congregation from the platform his wheelchair is sitting on. He lifts his hands up, asking the couple to seal their vows with a kiss. Paul and Rachel practically jump at one another, each of them wrapping their arms around the other and their lips fusing together. Billy laughs as the kiss keeps going then he clears his throat. I have to look away from the intimate moment and when I do I find Embry's eyes on me once again. He looks more calm now and I suppose that whatever had him upset has passed now as he mouths, "You look beautiful." I feel the blush creep up my neck and a soft smile spreads my mouth. _I need to talk to him_, I tell myself. _I don't think I can keep this up much longer_. _I want to tell him how I feel but I'm not sure when the right moment will be._

Before I can respond to Embry's compliment, Billy asks the small crowd to please welcome the new Mr. and Mrs. Paul Foster, which brings everyone to their feet cheering for the couple. Rachel releases Paul's hand and hugs each of us girls. When she makes it to me I whisper in her ear while we hug, "Congratulations." Rachel squeezes me then moves on to Ness before turning to grab Paul and take her first walk down the aisle with her husband. Jacob steps toward Ness, who glances over at me with a reassuring smile. She takes Jacob's arm and they follow the bride and groom down the aisle. Embry and I are next up and he steps toward me, holding out his elbow for me to take his arm so we can follow suit. When I loop my arm through his, Embry and I both speak at the same time, "We need to talk."

**A/N**: Dun dun duuuuuuuun. Everyone take a DEEP breath before you flounce us for that cliff hanger. ALL. Will. Be. Well. We really really promise. We wouldn't do y'all like that!

Be sure to follow us on Twitter (http:/twitter [dot] com/stupidleeches) and Tumblr (http:/stupidleeches [dot] tumblr [dot] com)! We post fun things and when NKR gets her hands on the accounts, she posts teasers and pictures.

Lillah's birthday present from her mom - http:/www[dot]coach[dot]com/online/handbags/-apparel_outerweartops-10551-10051-38476-en?t1Id=78&t2Id=38476&tier=2&LOC=LN - Grey Wool Trench coat $898.00


	34. Chapter 34 Turn This Around

**Chapter 34 "Turn This Around"**

**Disclaimer:** We give thanks every day for the world SM created, but we aren't her. Sorry to disappoint!  
**  
A/N:** Ok kids, we are rapidly approaching a resolution and this chapter is pretty much the thing we've all been waiting on. If you don't have us on author alert, NKR has been posting "drabbles" - which you can find on our profile page. These are little blurbs that correspond with "Losing Control". We won't ramble too much here because we know what you are after. There isn't any smut in this chapter *gasp* but we think you'll be as happy as we are. Don't forget to check our blog for teasers and other things. Also, follow us on Twitter because sometimes NKR sneak tweets dialogue as she's writing.

**Beta Note: **It's about fucking time :P

_A strangled smile fell from your face_  
_It kills me that I hurt you this way_  
_The worst part is that I didn't even know_  
_Now there's a million reasons for you to go_  
_But if you can find a reason to stay_

_I'll do whatever it takes_  
_To turn this around_  
_I know what's at stake_  
_I know that I've let you down_  
_And if you give me a chance_  
_Believe that I can change_  
_I'll keep us together whatever it takes_  
"Whatever It Takes" - Lifehouse

**EPOV**

The guys and I spend all morning and most of the afternoon setting up the tents, dance floor and seating for the ceremony and reception. Everyone is ragging on Paul, but I try to ignore them, just doing what I've been told. I let my mind drift to Lillah, wondering what she's doing and when she'll be here. I can't wait to see her in her dress; I know she'll be unbelievably beautiful. I'm so lost in my thoughts that I'm unaware when someone walks up next to me until I feel a hand on my shoulder. I turn to see Sam and nod my head in acknowledgment, "What's up?"

"Just checking to see if you need any help? It's about time to go back to the house and get ready," Sam tells me as I drive one last nail in place. I'm putting the finishing touches on a platform for Billy to sit on in his chair as he officiates the ceremony.

"Nah man," I tell him, "I'm good here; I think we're almost set."

Just as I stand Paul approaches; we gather our things to leave. This is probably the one part about this whole day that all of us are dreading. As we pile into Sam's Suburban, everyone grumbles at Paul, who explains that he tried to talk Rachel into letting us wear jeans and t-shirts but she wouldn't go for it. _I can only imagine what her reaction to his idea would have been.  
_  
It doesn't take us long to clean up and change; we head back over to the beach to wait on everyone just as the sun starts setting. I pull out my cell phone a few times, checking to make sure Lillah hasn't tried to call or sent me a text but there is nothing. I know she's busy with the girls, but I need to feel that connection with her. Something about today feels 'off' to me and it's wearing on my nerves.

When Billy arrives we do a quick run through of what will happen during the ceremony then stand around talking for a few minutes. Slowly, the other guys wander off, leaving just Billy and I. "So," Billy says while clearing his throat, "we have all of this set up, you want to make this a double wedding?"

My heart jumps at the idea but I know it's not the time. I want Lillah to have her own dream wedding, not someone else's, "I appreciate the offer, Billy but I'd rather wait."

"Stubborn," Billy sort of snorts and shakes his head.

"Not stubborn, I just want it to be special for her. Besides, Rachel would kill us if we eclipsed her wedding with a shotgun wedding of our own." _And who's to say Lillah wants to marry me, anyway?_ I silently add to myself.

Billy laughs; nodding his head, "That could be true. As much as Rachel loves Lillah I'm sure she'd be happier to have a separate wedding to attend." We begin to discuss the ceremony again as Sam and Jacob rejoin us. Guests are starting to arrive and the guys and I play host, showing them to their seats. I keep looking up, searching for Lillah every time I hear a car pull up but so far, she hasn't arrived. Knowing Rachel, she'll want to make a grand entrance so Paul won't see her dress before she walks down the aisle.

Finally, Billy instructs us to go ahead and move to the front to take our places alongside Paul. I begin to twitch with anxiety and tug at the bow tie around my neck. _Stupid tux._ While standing and waiting I let my thoughts drift to Lillah again. I've been carrying around her engagement ring since the second I purchased it. It's even in my pocket now; it seems silly, but I just couldn't leave it at home or in my truck. I felt like I would be leaving a part of myself behind if I had. Plus, I might actually need it tonight. I've been putting serious thought into when I will propose and how I'll do it, but I haven't found the right moment yet. It was on the tip of my tongue yesterday when I was giving her the necklace, but I knew it wasn't right. I want it to be perfect, for Lillah.

The sounds of music playing and a few awe's pull me from my thoughts; I look up to see Claire walking down the aisle, pulling a wagon that holds a sitting Eli. Claire and Eli are both smiling at all of the attention they are receiving as flower girl and ring bearer. They are pretty damn cute all dressed up and I can't help but smile at the two of them. Quil reaches for Claire's hand when she gets close enough to the front. She pulls her wagon off to the side and Eli sits there, squealing happily when he sees Sam, who tries to quiet him down without moving from his spot. Sue stands from her place next to Charlie while much of the audience laughs. She lifts Eli onto her hip, taking him to her seat and placing him on her lap.

Quil takes a seat and Claire climbs into his lap just as Emily begins her walk down the aisle. I don't know what order the imprints will walk out in but I stay alert, waiting for _my_ Lillah. Kim is next, a broad smile on her glowing face as she walks to join us. Then finally I see Lillah step up to the end of the aisle and begin walking toward me. She is more beautiful than anyone I've seen in all of my life. Her hair is loose around her shoulders, curling this way and that, and her blue dress is the perfect complement to her fair skin and luscious curves. I have to force myself to pull my eyes up away from her breasts and the 'V' of her dress.

When my eyes reach her face I realize that Lillah is upset over something. She's frowning, which surprises me, given the circumstances. Her eyes look darker than usual and I begin to worry, silently willing Lillah to look at me, but she doesn't. It's like she's in an entirely different world, which makes me nervous. Lillah steps up next to Kim, taking her place with the other ladies and the look on her face deepens. I feel something hit me in the chest and looking down I see Jared's arm sticking out in front of me. Only in that moment do I realize I've made a move to step forward and his arm, along with Jacob's hand on my forearm, have stopped me. Jacob makes a low growl so only I can hear and Jared speaks quietly, "Easy man."

I look back up and finally Lillah's eyes meet mine, giving me a reassuring look when I should be the one comforting her. Jacob and Jared's arms drop just as the wedding march begins and Rachel starts her walk down the aisle. As I'm watching Lillah I see her hand move to her necklace, her fingers moving over the "L". Seeing her touch the necklace so lovingly makes me relax. When she places it back against her skin my eyes move back to hers and I don't allow myself to look away. I need to make sure she's ok and I'm afraid if I release her stare whatever was haunting her will return. The last thing I ever want is to see Lillah upset or sad, no matter the cause. I wait impatiently through the ceremony, moving to the side so I can look around Paul and Rachel to see her; even when Lillah looks away from me I can't pull my eyes from her face. It's killing me to wait through this ceremony to go to her.

Finally Billy announces the new Mr. and Mrs. Paul Foster and I'm bouncing on the balls of my feet, ready to reach out and pull Lillah to me. Of course Rachel makes me wait longer, going to hug each of the girls before she and Paul finally descend the aisle together. Jacob looks back at me before he moves to Ness, "Stay calm, Embry."

Taking a deep breath I see Jacob and Ness start walking away, finally. I move to offer Lillah my arm, relieved when hers loops in mine. In that moment of contact I can finally feel what is going on with her; her heart is racing and she's taking shallow breaths, but she isn't blushing. _She's upset about something._ Whatever it is, I need to know, now. Before I can take a step I look down at her, whispering, "We need to talk."

Only, as I'm speaking, I see and hear her say the same words to me and in that instant I know something _is_ terribly wrong. Jared shoving me gets us both moving but I can't take my eyes off of her, all the possibilities floating through my mind. _She finally realized I imprinted?_ No, that can't be it. _Someone told her I imprinted?_ Doubtful since I've been with all the guys today. _She knows she deserves better?_ My heart starts pounding at this thought, but I find it hard to believe after all the time she spent trying to reassure me. _She found someone else?_ Much as that frightens me, I don't think she'd meet someone today, since she spent most of the day with the imprintees.

We round the corner to a little staging area inside the reception tent where Rachel, Paul, Ness, and Jacob are waiting. I'm about to pull Lillah out into the cool night to talk when Rachel grabs my arm, "Don't you dare move, as soon as everyone clears out we are taking pictures."

Looking down at Lillah I sigh regretfully, knowing we can't talk like I want to with everyone here, "Are you ok?"

"Um, yeah," Lillah looks around as Kim and Jared join our group, nibbling at her lip. "Are you?"

"I'm fine as long as you are, what had you so upset before baby?" I whisper as quietly as I can.

Her fingers again find the necklace, as her eyes dart toward Sam, Emily, Eli, and Claire walking into the little area. Sam announces that Billy will come grab us once everyone moves to the reception tent. Glancing over my shoulder I swear I see Emily mouthing 'Tell him' to Lillah. My heart speeds up again as I turn back to search Lillah's eyes. She's obviously nervous, which in turn, makes _me_ nervous. Grasping her right hand I pull it to my mouth, kissing her friendship ring before whispering, "Tell me, please."

Lillah's words are soft and barely loud enough for me to hear, but they go straight to my heart. "This necklace was your mother's."

Nodding slowly I swallow past the lump in my throat, afraid of how to respond to her statement of fact. _How did she find out? _Not that I mind, but who recognized the necklace? Looking back over my shoulder I see Emily talking to Sam but her eyes are on us. _How could she know?_

"Emily told me this morning. Embry, why didn't _you_ tell me?" Lillah's right hand is still in mine and I can feel her pulse jump as she finishes speaking. _What is she thinking?_

Shrugging I look down at her fingers still moving over the necklace as I whisper, "I didn't want it to be a big deal. It just seemed right that you should have it."

"You should have told me, because it is a big deal," her eyes start to tear up and she looks away. I squeeze her hand, trying to get her attention but she shakes her head. After a few minutes she looks back at me, but is no longer looking in my eyes as she speaks low, "Embry, I'm wearing a necklace that has my initial engraved on the front plus yours and your mom's names engraved inside."

I can't say anything, surprised that Lillah knows about the names engraved on the inside of the locket. I didn't want to keep this a secret from her, but I was so surprised by her reaction to the necklace that I couldn't even find the words to tell her. I'm trying to think of what to say when Billy stops by, asking all of us to move back to the ceremony tent for photos.

Moving to take a step, I'm surprised when Lillah stops me. She waits until everyone has left then grabs her purse. She pulls a yellowed envelope out of it, placing it in my hands, "Embry, I know what your mom's name means." My heart stops beating. Suddenly I'm out of time. If she knows about my mom's name, then she already knows that I love her. I didn't want her to find out this way; I wanted to tell her when the time was right for both of us.

I open my mouth to speak but Lillah shakes her head, her words tumbling out, "I know because your mom wrote a letter and gave it to Emily. Your mom told Emily to give this note to the woman that wore her necklace. The woman that you chose to give this necklace to; to me. Embry-"

Emily walks in, apologizing as she pulls Lillah by the hand, taking her away from me, "I'm sorry, I tried to give you guys more time but we need you now, Lillah. Embry," she looks at me with sympathy in her eyes. She sees the envelope in my hands and she sighs, "I can only buy you a few more minutes, so hurry."

Then they are gone. My chance to explain everything to Lillah is over as she's swept up in wedding duties. I look down at the letter and my heart catches back up, moving at double time as I slowly pull the piece of paper from the envelope. My hands are shaking as I unfold the sheet and I want to cry when I see the familiar handwriting of my mom on the page. Holding my breath, I read through the note quickly. Just as I've reached the end, Sam sticks his head around the corner, "Embry?"

Looking up at him, I take shallow breaths to try to stay focused. Sam steps in, "I'm sorry to say this to you, but you need to pull yourself together. Emily said you might be flipping out. Want to talk?"

"I'm not flipping out; it's completely normal for your wife to be holding a letter from my mom." Unable to stand still any longer I start pacing the tiny area as I speak, "A letter your wife was apparently told to give to the woman who knows my 'big' secret and that I 'picked' by giving her my mother's necklace. A letter in which my mom says she thinks I love Lillah and that my giving her the necklace was my way of showing her what I can't say. Oh yeah, Mom also mentioned in this letter that she suspects I'm still keeping secrets from Lillah." I stop in front of Sam, practically panting I'm so agitated, "Sam, my mom died two years ago. How could she have known all this?"

"Embry, you need to calm down." Sam speaks evenly, not yelling, but in a commanding tone none the less. "You can't do anything about that letter now. You and Lillah have both read it, now you need to talk about it. _After_ all of this wedding stuff is done. I'm sorry man, I know the timing is shit, but you have to calm down and put this to the back of your mind for right now. Lillah is out there smiling with the best of them. I'm sure you'll know it's not her real smile, just like she'll know it isn't your real smile, but you both need to pretend for a little longer. For Rachel and Paul; remember this is _their_ day."

Taking deep breaths I nod at Sam, knowing he's right. It isn't fair to ruin Paul and Rachel's wedding just because of this letter from the grave. I fold the letter, returning it to Lillah's purse; grabbing her purse I turn back to Sam, putting on my best fake smile, "I'm ready."

"Well you look appropriately whipped carrying her purse," Sam laughs as he leads me back into the ceremony tent.

Rachel is fuming as she watches us approach, "Took you long enough; get up here you two so we can finish these pictures."

Lillah watches as I set her purse down in one of the empty chairs. Unable to ignore her I move to stand next to her, thankful these pictures have all of the couples together. When I finally have her in my arms again I pull her tight, kissing the top of her head as I whisper, "I'll explain everything tonight, I _promise_."

She doesn't say anything, just nods. The photographer barks orders of where to stand, how to hold her, and where to look. I glance down to see Lillah's smile, and just as Sam predicted, it's a nice enough smile, but it doesn't reach her eyes. Plastering on my own fake smile, I prepare myself to suffer through the remainder of the evening, biting my tongue when all I want to do is pull the ring out of my pocket, explain everything to Lillah, and propose to her.

Once the pictures are done, we move into the reception tent. When we sit down at the table there are plates of food placed in front of each of us. Glancing over at Lillah I see her moving the food around with her fork, not eating. "Please eat," I whisper. I don't know when she received the letter, but I'm guessing she hasn't eaten all day.

She shakes her head, but before I can say more the speeches and toasts are beginning. Then all the 'single' women are dragged out onto the dance floor. Rachel insists that Lillah and Ness join and I soon realize why; when Rachel tosses her bouquet over her head it conveniently lands in Lillah's hands. Lillah stumbles back to the table, her eyes wide as she looks between the flowers in her hand and me. Ness is laughing next to her but stops cold when she sees me. She releases Lillah's arm and moves to sit next to Jacob, who is now eying me.

Before we can say anything, we are instructed to surround Paul and Rachel while they cut the cake. My body moves without me realizing it; in fact, I've felt like I have only floated through the entire afternoon and evening. When I focus back in I'm impressed, but not surprised, that neither Paul nor Rachel smashes the cake in the others face. I tune back out and that is about all I remember of the moment.

Lillah is standing next to me and her erratic heartbeat keeps pulling my attention away. She goes from a speeding heart to moments when I'm not sure her heart is even beating. I suddenly wish Edward was here, so he could tell me what Lillah is thinking. Even though I'm guessing it has to do with what Mom said in the letter, I don't know how she is feeling about it._ Is she happy? Sad? Afraid? Angry? All of the above?_ A wave of guilt washes over me as I know I could have prevented all of this had I just told her everything in the beginning. Or any time since. However, my mom was completely right in her letter; my own stubbornness and need to protect myself kept me from being honest with her. It's my fault we are where we are right now.

I can hear Lillah sniffling next to me, but when I look down at her she is looking out at the dance floor. Looking up, I see why; Rachel and Billy are sharing an adorable father-daughter dance in which she is sitting on his lap as he spins around the dance floor in his wheelchair. Paul approaches, easily picking Rachel up to have their first dance.

Soon after their dance begins, Sam and Emily pull all of us out to the dance floor to join them. I take Lillah in my arms, unsure of what to do, how to move; she doesn't look at me but starts whispering instructions, explaining how to hold her and what to do with my feet as we slowly move across the dance floor.

We dance past Rachel who stops us, grabbing my arm before suddenly hugging me, "Thank you! That was the best wedding present ever." Taking a step back from me, Rachel then hugs Lillah, "You have the best boyfriend!"

When Rachel releases Lillah I move to pull her against me again. Her face is blank, which scares me, as she whispers, "What present did you get Rachel?"

"I made sure her sister, Rebecca, was here for the wedding," mumbling against the top of her head, I explain about the first part of their wedding present. Glancing over Lillah's head, I can see Rebecca sitting next to her father, her hand wrapped in his as they talk over one another.

Lillah's eyes go wide as she looks up at me. She's searching for something in my eyes, but I don't know what. Finally she whispers, "Oh." She rests her head against my chest as she whispers, "Rachel said it was really expensive to fly here from Hawaii."

Taking a chance I kiss the top of her head, "It was expensive, but worth it. She deserved to have her twin sister here on her special day."

She nods but doesn't look at me. Another slow song starts but she remains quiet in my arms. Unable to take the silence any longer I ask, "What are you thinking?"

"How did you get the money?" Lillah chokes out, her eyes darting up at me and then back down.

Cupping her chin, I hold her face steady, looking in her eyes as I speak, "Paul and Rachel bought my mom's house from me after she died. I didn't want their money, but Paul wouldn't take a 'hand out'. I didn't like it, but I understood." Taking a deep breath, I explain the rest as quickly as I can, "I set the money aside, invested some of it but didn't touch it until now. I used a very small part of it to get Rebecca here."

"Embry- I don't - _why?_ Why were you always worrying about how much money I had if you had money yourself?" Lillah's heart is back to racing and we've stopped moving. Releasing her chin, I get us dancing again as I try to come up with a way to respond.

Deciding that I can't tell her anything but the truth I do my best to explain, "It isn't my money, its Paul and Rachel's. I considered giving it back to them, but Paul would be pissed at me. So instead, I used part of the money as a wedding present to them. It really isn't that much money, I'm pretty sure I could buy your front porch with what I have." I grin at her, trying to show her I can joke about it now. When she doesn't return my smile, my face falls. Taking a deep breath I give her my best reasoning, "Lillah, it's a drop in the bucket compared to what your parent's have. Even with Paul and Rachel's money, I still can't provide for you like they can."

Lillah actually stomps her foot and it sounds like she is screaming with her mouth shut. She looks up at me, her frustration evident, "You still don't get it, Embry. I never asked you to provide for me. I want us to be able to provide for _each other_. Equals."

I don't know how to respond, but I feel like I need to. Now that we are talking, I don't want to stop, "I'm sorry, baby."

Looking away, she shakes her head, "You should have told me this, Embry."

"I didn't mean to keep the money from you, Lillah. I never thought of the money as mine because I would never spend it on me," I want to tell her that I would, and have, used the money for her, including for her engagement ring, but there are still too many people here. I don't want to mention 'imprint' in a crowded room.

I can barely make out her next words she speaks so softly, "What else haven't you told me?"

Quil taps me on the shoulder before I can answer, "Mind if I cut in, I'd like a dance with my cuz."

Resigning myself, I nod, but quickly kiss Lillah on the cheek before letting her go, my voice barely above a whisper, "I promise, no more secrets after tonight."

"Ok, Embry," she tells me, her voice soft and a little shaky as Quil sweeps her up in his arms. He looks at me knowingly and I grimace at him. _This is going to be a long night._

"Hi, handsome, dance with me?" Emily speaks from behind me and I turn to see a sympathetic look on her face. Lifting a hand I invite her to join me, my arms circling her loosely as we begin to dance. "How you holding up?"

I half scoff, half laugh at her question. "I don't know, to be honest. I'm scared, Emily." I feel like a pussy for admitting this to Emily but it's the truth.

"Embry," Emily says my name and doesn't speak again until I look down at her, "You don't have to be scared. The only thing you need to do is tell her the truth; I know you said you didn't weeks ago, but I'm assuming you imprinted on her?"

It takes me a few minutes to give Emily an answer. My mind whirls until I have to shake my head to clear it. Emily is looking up at me, a little concerned and I realize we are swaying back and forth only because of her. I glance around to make sure no one else has noticed anything and Sam catches my eye, frowning. _Damn._ Looking back at Emily I sigh and let my shoulders slump. "Yes."

"Embry, that's so great! I had really hoped it was her but Sam wouldn't say anything and I began to wonder if I was wrong." Emily sounds a little sad at the possibility of being incorrect about Lillah and it makes me feel guilty.

"No, you weren't wrong. I'm sorry I lied to you. I just didn't want to accept it, accept her, in the beginning. I was a dumbass though, because she's everything I dreamed she'd be-," I stop and shake my head. "No, she's more than that. I'm ashamed that I pushed her away; that I denied her when she deserves so much more."

Emily gets us moving but gives me a stern look, "You realize you have to tell her, right?"

"I _need_ to tell her. It's eating me alive that I haven't yet," that nightmare from last week suddenly is feeling like it could be a reality soon if I don't tell her.

Emily laughs, shaking her head at me. "So do it, then! What are you waiting on?"

"I don't know." Shrugging my shoulders I glance over at Sam, who hasn't stopped watching us, and Lillah, whom I've managed to keep in my peripheral vision this whole time. Watching her smile at Quil makes my heart clench, especially since she's barely looked at me tonight, "I'm chicken shit, I guess. What if she doesn't want me?"

"Really? How could you think she wouldn't?" Emily's rolls her eyes, her words coming with a distinctive "duh" undertone. Softening her voice she smiles sweetly at me, "Embry, she adores you, I don't think there is much you could say that would make her not want to be with you."

"Even finding out I kept something huge from her?" I shake my head, knowing this is going to be a difficult conversation.

Emily shakes her head at me, "Embry, I know you are new to all this, but couples fight, they disagree- even imprints. Sam is very stubborn, I swear I want to punch him some days; but I love him. It's going to upset her, but it won't change how she _feels_ about you. You can't let her being upset temporarily keep you from finally telling her. By confessing, you'll be giving not only yourself, but also Lillah, what you both want."

I don't say anything for a few seconds, just taking in Emily's words before realizing that I need to ask her something else, "Em, how did you get that letter?"

Emily sighs sadly, "Your mother gave it to me. I spent a lot of time talking to her, assuring her you were being taken care of, and would continue to be watched over even after she was gone. She wanted to see you happy and settled but she knew you weren't going to do that with just anyone. As we were talking one day, she removed the necklace for the first time. She let me see it, explaining the significance of the necklace and what I should do when you finally gave it to someone. She'd hoped it would be the woman you wanted to spend the rest of your life with. I've had that letter tucked away for some time now."

"Did you read it?" Not that it matters, but I hope in my heart Lillah and I are the only ones that ever read my mom's words.

Emily is quick to answer, lifting her hands for a moment, "No! Absolutely not. I would never betray her trust that way." Relaxing again, she speaks softly, "Embry, I loved your mother very much. I felt blessed to get to know such an amazing woman; she deserved every bit of my respect. I knew the letter contained something important but I had no idea what."

Exhaling the breath I didn't realize I was holding I give her a brief overview, "She pretty much outed me to Lillah without even really knowing about the wolf thing. I don't get how she knew I was up to something."

"She was your mom, Embry. We have a sixth sense about these things," Emily smiles at me then turns to glance at Lillah, "I think it's time you rescue her."

Turning fully I see Claire approaching Lillah and Quil. There is fire in her eyes that worries me; thanking Emily, I pull away and move to reach out to grab Lillah's hand. She is obviously surprised when I pull her into my arms; gasping audibly when I spin her around and move to another area of the dance floor.

As we pass Emily I see Sam scoop her up in his arms, twirling her around as she giggles. Looking around the room, I notice Paul nose-to-nose with his new wife and he's grinning down at her. Jared is holding Kim tight, nuzzling her neck as they move along. I'm not sure why everyone is being so cuddly and romantic until I hear the words of the song playing:

_"When a man loves a woman  
Can't keep his mind on nothin' else  
He'd trade the world  
For the good thing he's found"_

Slowly moving Lillah across the floor, I do my best to catch all the words, realizing every single verse describes exactly how I feel about her. Tightening my arms around her, I easily lift her up to stand on the tops of my feet. Her arms naturally move around my neck and that is when I notice how close to tears she has gotten. "Lills, baby-," I don't know what to say to her; how to make her feel happier.

She shakes her head, not meeting my eyes as she speaks, "Embry, I'm sorry I got upset with you about the money. It's not fair of me to expect you to tell me everything when I haven't been completely honest with you." When she glances up at me, she still seems as upset as she has been all night, but now she also looks nervous. There is finally natural color on her cheeks and her eyes keeps bouncing around the room.

Unsure of what secret she could possibly be keeping from me, my mind races as I try to look her in the eye, "Lills, you know you can tell me anything."

"I hope that's true," she sighs. As the song comes to an end, she steps off my feel; when she looks up at me I'm lost in her eyes. She looks so sad, but hopeful. I want to wipe away all her tears; I hate seeing her sad for even a moment. It's killing me to know her sadness is because I haven't been honest with her. She grabs my arm and pulls me to the edge of the dance floor. Looking around to make sure no one is listening, I notice that only wolves, imprints, and Tribal Council members are left in the tent. Once she stops, Lillah whispers to me, "Thing is, Embry, I knew what I was getting into when we got together. I knew the risks, but I thought I could handle it."

"What risks? What are you talking about, baby?" Her words set my heart pounding so hard it feels like it's going to beat its way out of my chest. I have no idea what she could possibly mean now. This entire night has me so unraveled that I can't think straight.

She opens her mouth to speak when a fast song comes on, drowning out her words. I have my hand on her elbow, ready to pull her out of the tent to finally talk when Rachel runs and grabs her other arm, pulling her out to the middle of the dance floor. I stand there watching Lillah with the other imprintees; they are all laughing and dancing to the song, but Lillah keeps glancing over her shoulder at me.

Just as I'm about to go grab her from the circle, someone claps a hand on my shoulder and pulls me off the floor. Turning, I find myself surrounded by Jacob, Quil, Sam, and Jared. Jacob releases his grip on my shoulder when I don't move.

"What's going on? You look like shit and she looks like she's about to cry," Jared frowns at me. I'm surprised anyone has noticed, I thought we were doing a decent enough job of pretending.

Quickly filling them in, I explain about the note from my mom to Lillah. Sam recovers the fastest, since he's already heard the basic details, "You need to tell her, tonight Embry. The sooner the better."

"You just want him to tell Lillah tonight so you can win the bet," Quil grumbles. "I almost won it last Saturday; I bet two weeks and that was two weeks on the dot. He was close to cracking and she was catching on. I'm surprised she didn't grill your ass then."

I knew he was up to something when we were babysitting the kids; his not so subtle hints about telling the truth were his way of winning. If I had told her that night he would have won the money, not that it matters. Shaking my head, I decide to ignore Quil, turning to Sam, "He's right, as long as I tell her in," checking the watch I rarely wear, I look back up, "the next two hours, you win the bet. Any plans for the money?"

The music stops thumping and I turn to search out Lillah, nearly falling over when I see her standing just behind Quil. Her eyes are wide and I know she heard at least what I said before she whispers, "What bet? What's going on?"

"No- Nothing, Lillah, it's stupid," I move to pull her to me but she steps back.

Her jaw tightens and she speaks through clenched teeth, "You said as long as you tell her in the next two hours Sam wins the bet. Tell who, what? Me? What else haven't you told me, Embry? Was your mom right? Are you really keeping secrets from me?"

"I-," shaking my head I try to clear my mind so I can focus on how to respond, "Lillah, you're misunderstanding." I glance over at the guys and they all hold their hands up in the air, slowly backing away from us.

"So this wasn't a bet about me? Are you keeping secrets from some other woman?" Lillah stops her movement and I can hear her cry out over her hands, which are now completely covering her mouth. Tears are falling down her face as she moans, "Oh God!" Everything is moving in slow motion as I watch her start to sink to her knees. Knocking chairs out of my way I run to her as fast as I can, catching her just before she falls. Moving her to a chair, I try to calm her down but she pushes my hands away.

My heart sinks_._ "Lillah, please, let me explain-"

Shaking her head she cuts me off, "There's nothing to explain." Lillah looks as if she's made some sort of realization, "You imprinted, didn't you?" Her voice drops to a whisper and she speaks again, "It doesn't matter how much I love you, I can't fight an imprint."

She moves so fast she is a blur of blue to me; my mind is still trying to understand the words I just heard her say. "What?" Looking up I see she has almost reached the entrance to the tent. Remembering the nightmare, I run as fast as I can, knowing I can't let her walk out the door, or in this case, the tent. My hand reaches out and grabs hers just as she lifts the flap, letting a cold ocean breeze touch both of us. When she shivers I use the moment to pull her back into my arms. I easily lift her off her feet, moving us the relative quiet of the area the ceremony was held in.

Pulling out a chair, I sit down with her in my lap but she won't stand for that; instead she jumps to her feet, pacing in front of me. I stand myself, only to prevent her from leaving. I know I'm officially out of time and have to tell her the truth, now. When Lillah's frantic pacing slows down and I can see her body only intermittently shivering, I take a cautious step toward her, trying to catch her eyes. Goosebumps have popped up on her skin from the cold night air that now fills the space, so I pull off my tux jacket off, trying to catch her so I can wrap it around her shoulders. My brain finally catches up with Lillah's words and I'm in shock, "Did you say that you love me?"

Her head jerks up like she is shocked I heard this, or that she even said it. Her shoulders slump as she sinks into a chair, and I can just barely make out the single word she utters, "Yes." It is possibly the most beautiful word ever created in the English language.

Knowing she's still upset, I place the jacket around her shoulders before taking the seat next to her instead of pulling her into my lap like I want to. We are both quiet until I'm suddenly hit that she said something earlier about not being completely honest, "Is this what you were trying to tell me before? Why was falling in love with me a risk for you?"

She closes her eyes and takes a deep breath, "Because I knew you didn't want a relationship."

"Lillah," her eyes open and I can see fresh tears falling down her cheeks. I tentatively reach one hand out, focusing on brushing away her tears so she won't notice how much my hand is shaking. Taking a deep breath, I close my eyes for just a second, before opening them to watch her face as I speak, "I didn't want a relationship with just anyone, Lillah. I didn't know that until I finally had you; it was you I have been waiting for."

Her eyes slide close and I can feel a few more tears fall onto my hands as we sit in silence. Finally, she looks up at me again, hesitant when she speaks, "What was the bet about? Just be honest with me, Embry."

Knowing she loves me helps, but I'm still nervous that she isn't going to stick around. I'm afraid I'll lose her if I tell her everything but equally afraid I'll lose her if I don't. Shaking my head I remind myself of my promise to her earlier; I will tell her everything tonight even if it means losing her, she deserves the truth. Preparing myself, I move my hand from her face. Clinching my fists in my lap, I suppress the need to punch something very hard, like Sam or Paul's face, for having to answer this question. Growling low I speak as calmly as I can, "It was stupid, the guys bet how long it would take me to tell you everything."

"Tell me everything? What does that even mean? You said that earlier but I don't understand, what is there to tell me?" Her voice sounds strained as she asks, like she's having to force the words out.

I take a shuddering breath before beginning to speak. I don't know what to tell her first; that I love her or that she's my imprint? I'm unsure what will be easier for her to swallow. _Maybe one will make the other seem more plausible?_ The voice in my head tells me to "just be a man" and tell her, no matter what order it's in. I know I owe her this; I owe both of us this, I'm just not sure where to begin. "Lillah, you mean more to me than I can ever tell you. I don't have enough words to explain how I feel about you." I stop, shaking my head when she dips her face down, but I won't allow her to break our gaze. "Lills, I need you to look at me; I need you to look into my eyes and see the truth, please?" The last word comes out weakly but she finally looks back up and reconnects her stare with mine.

"First of all, I- I never wanted a relationship with any _other_ woman, but you aren't those women; you are so much more than they ever dreamed of being. You are precious and beautiful, both inside and out," I shake my head and laugh sardonically at my own stupidity, "I don't deserve someone as amazing as you are but I'll be damned if I lose you because of my stubborn pride."

I can't stand not touching her any longer; reaching out I easily scoop her up and place her on my lap as I continue, "Lillah, the reason I don't want to be with anyone else is because you are my life now. You are _it_ for me. The day you stepped across the parking lot and Paul came unglued; the reason I was so scared he would hurt you is because I-" she gasps and chokes on a quiet sob and I take her face in my hands, trying to ease the panic that is making me ramble. Just being able to feel her skin against mine is enough to give me the smallest bit of relief.

"Lillah, that day, when I carried you off to the beach- I didn't understand why I felt such a magnetic pull to you. I didn't know until you looked up at me. I'm so sorry," I tell her, my words choppy and chaotic. "When I looked into your eyes it was like being struck by lightning, the ground was no longer under my feet; the world as I knew it no longer existed.

"You became everything to me in that moment but I tried so desperately to fight it and I'm sorry for that. I should have never let myself push you away; physically or emotionally. There might not be anything I can do to change the past, but I'll do my fucking best to make sure the future is everything it should be."

Lillah's eyes are huge in her face, both from anxiety and fear. I want to kick my own ass for making her feel this way; especially knowing I could have told her all of this before now. I don't expect her to speak when she does; when her beautiful mouth opens and she begins, I hold my breath in fear. "Whatever it is you're trying to tell me, Embry, just say it. I'm so tired and I don't know what to do anymore. I'm so scared I'm losing you."

"Oh no, baby. Don't," I wrap my arms around her, smoothing her hair back away from her neck, then placing a kiss on her skin. "There's nothing to be scared of, Lillah." I lift my face from its spot against her silky flesh, looking into her eyes while taking her face between my hands once more. "That day on the beach, I imprinted, Lills." The words are just barely out of my mouth when Lillah begins sobbing, gasping for air. I begin to panic even more, speaking without even knowing what I'm saying. "Baby, I'm sorry, so _so_ sorry. I never wanted to hurt you. I thought I was protecting you from this life. I just can't do it anymore. I need you as more than just my 'girlfriend'."

"W-who?" Lillah sobs out against my shoulder and I don't understand her.

"Who, what, baby?" I ask in desperation.

"Who is she?" She takes in a shuddering breath then, "Who did you imprint on?"

I'm shocked at her question; I thought I made it clear that it was her I imprinted on. _Surely I didn't ramble so much that it didn't make sense?_ "_You,_ Lillah. I imprinted on _you_. How could it be anyone else?" I tell her, my voice growing gruffer as I make her look into my eyes. "You are my entire world, I don't remember what my life was like before you. I don't want to _ever_ remember what it was like then; I was lost until you found me."

Lillah's eyes close and she sniffles quietly several times, tears are still streaming down her face and I pray that they are of happiness, not sorrow. When she finally speaks I hold my breath, "You imprinted- on me? I thought- I didn't think- Are you sure?"

"I'm positive." Pulling on all the patience I have in me, I sit there just holding her, letting my words sink in. I know she must be trying to process this overload of new information so I remain silent until it becomes too much. The fear that begins to course through my body makes me shake and I have to know if I've lost my chance with her. "I understand if this is hard for you to accept, but I just needed you to know, Lillah. You are the woman I want to spend forever with. I love you, Lillah. I love you so much it hurts."

Her eyes open in shock and then I see her face crumble and the sobbing starts again. This time she flings her body at me, wrapping her arms around my neck. My body relaxes slightly as I pull her against me tightly, rocking her back and forth, much like the first time I ever laid eyes on her. I move my hand over her hair softly, hoping to calm her. Words are still tumbling from my lips but this time they make more sense. "I love you, Lillah. I've never loved anyone as much as I love you. It's been so hard keeping this from you, I've wanted to tell you so many times but I was afraid you couldn't accept me. I was scared you couldn't love me."

Lillah pushes me back with the palms of her hands and even though her face is streaked with mascara and tears there is a fire in her eyes that draws me in. "How could I not love you, Embry? You gave me everything I ever wanted. You gave me friendship and an amazing boyfriend. You made me feel _more_ than anyone ever has; confidence in myself, beautiful, sexy. I have grown so much since you came into my life. I'm not the same person I was before and I don't want to be that girl ever again," she tells me and I grin because her words mirror my own so closely.

"I tried so hard not to love you but I realized quickly I couldn't fight it. You had a fist around my heart, Embry, and I never wanted you to let it go." Her voice trails off softly as she finishes speaking, "I was so- sure that there was someone else you were destined to be with. The idea that she could show up and I would lose you made me ache inside."

"So you love me, then?" I ask tentatively.

"Yes!" She laughs through her tears.

"Could you maybe say it?" I need to hear the actual phrase come from her lips, spoken with happiness, not fear.

Lillah's voice is shaky when she speaks but her eyes are shining back at me with love, "I love you. I love you with everything I am and everything I have."

"Again?" I ask as I pull her back into my arms.

She laughs and kisses the side of my face, my jaw and neck, then whispers into my ear, "I love you. I love you, Embry Call. I love you _so_ much." Lillah places another kiss against my neck and whispers, "With all of my heart, I love you."

I hold her for what feels like hours, my heart pounding inside my chest in excitement and my shoulders relaxing more as every moment passes. I know Lillah is still processing everything and I completely expect her to want to talk about my omission but for now, I'm happy to have this moment. I hear movement and voices from inside the reception tent and I know that soon we'll be looked for by the others. I imagine the guys have probably had to keep the other imprintees away as it is.

"Lills? We should probably get back to the reception?" I allow my words to come out as a question since I'm not sure how she'll feel about going back just yet. Her head nods against my shoulder and she inhales deeply before lifting it. Lillah's face is tear streaked and blotchy but she's still the most beautiful thing I've ever laid eyes on. I take her face in my hands and run my thumbs along her cheekbones, wiping away the dampness that lingers. "We can wait a while longer, if you want?"

"No, we should get back over there. I'm sure Rachel is flipping out at this point." I nod my head, knowing that Lillah is probably right about Rachel. I'm a little afraid of her reaction when we finally walk out.

Lillah slips off of my lap and begins to step forward but I stop her. Pulling her to me gently, I place my lips on hers because it's just hit me that I haven't tasted her mouth in a while. "I love you," I whisper because I don't think I'll get enough of hearing myself say those words out loud.

After we both pull away there is a soft smile on her beautiful face and she takes my hand in hers, lacing our fingers together. I lead us out, holding back the plastic that kept us secluded from the others. Lillah walks ahead of me, but stops short just as I drop the plastic flap. I look up sharply, curious to what the problem is.

There's a small group standing just far away enough to provide us privacy but close enough that it annoys me slightly. The guys have varying expressions on their faces; they range from smiles to concern to cocky. The imprintees have tentative smiles plastered on their faces, but when they see Lillah I notice worry crease their foreheads. I place a soft kiss on her temple and when I look back up I notice Emily has relaxed a little and she moves to wrap her arms around Sam.

"Well it's about time, are you trying to ruin my wedding?" Rachel is the first to speak, trying to sound annoyed but I can hear the uncertainty in her voice. When Lillah and I walk forward and the light catches us there is a gasp and I look at Lillah through their eyes. Her eyes are red from crying and I know it isn't lost on our make-shift family. I pull Lillah into my side, wrapping my arms around her and kissing the side of her face as we stop in front of the crowd.

"We're sorry, Rachel, there was something we needed to talk about." Lillah's voice sounds happy but tired to my ears.

"Well I sure hope it's _all_ taken care of now?" Rachel says and throws a look in my direction. I can't help the smile that spreads across my face as I nod and look down at Lillah.

"Yes, Rachel, it's - mostly taken care of. We have to talk more later, I think?"

I don't look away from Lillah and she nods her head and mutters, "Yes, we do."

I place a kiss on her forehead and let my eye close before I look back at our friends, "I'd like to introduce you all to the love of my life; my imprintee, Lillah Hunter."

As soon as the words leave my mouth there are shrieks and yelling from everyone. I'm pretty sure I hear Rachel scream, "Holy crack on a crack whore," but her words are covered by Lillah giggling as the girls pull her from my arms.

"Hey!" I call after them and Rachel turns to give me a dirty look as Lillah hands me my jacket. I sigh and roll my eyes, watching as they all huddle together on the dance floor while the guys inch closer to me.

Quil is the first to speak, "It's about fucking time, man." His voice sounds like he's annoyed but there is a smile on his face. His comment sets the other guys off.

"Seriously, dude, I began to wonder if I'd beat you to the punch with Ness," Jacob confesses and my eyebrows shoot up in surprise.

Jared wiggles his eyebrows, "Now that you told her, you might be needing these. I won't be using them anytime soon." He holds up a string of condoms which sets everyone to laughing. Grabbing the condoms, I stuff them in my pocket, grinding my teeth together to stop myself from saying anything.

The guys start speaking over one another as they pound me on the shoulders. "Who won the bet?" Paul wants to know.

"Fucking Sam!" Quil mutters as Sam grins and shrugs.

"All you care about is the bet, Quil. Get over it! You lost a week ago. Don't be a sore loser," I tell him and he squints his eyes at me. Leave it to the guys to focus on the bet, not the fact that I've just told Lillah that I imprinted on her.

As if he hears my thoughts, Sam speaks up, "You finally did it, huh? I'm proud of you, Embry. She's an incredible woman and both of you deserve to be happy."

"Thanks, Sam. That means a lot," I tell him as I clap him on the shoulder with my hand. "Now I just have to ask her to marry me," I tell him with a shuddering breath. I'm still not sure how she will react once the shock has worn off. I honestly expected her to be enraged that I'd been lying to her all this time. Once the girls talk to her I don't know what she's going to say or do. Even though she admitted her love for me I'm worried that she won't accept my proposal.

As everyone talks, I slowly move so that I can see around them to keep my eyes on Lillah. She's dancing with the other imprintees and I can see that she's having fun, which puts me a bit more at ease. Ness is twirling her in a circle and they are both laughing, their arms waving in the air. Jacob stands next to me and I glance over at him. His eyes are glued to Ness and I have to bite my tongue to keep from saying something about him being 'next'. The look on his face is intense and his body is full of tension; I imagine the guys have seen me in the same state lately.

"I'm happy for you, Em. You really deserve to have someone as great as Lillah, I hope Ness is able to accept it as readily when I tell her," he confesses and looks over at me. I'm surprised to hear that he's worried about the possibility of Ness being upset with him.

I scoff lightly; I might not be close with his imprintee but I see how she looks at him. It's obvious that she's growing to see him as more than a friend. "It'll work out for you too, Jake." He opens his mouth to speak just as Ness comes bouncing over to us. Her cheeks are bright pink and her eyes are full of mischief. "Come dance with me," she sings in her melodic voice and Jacob's face breaks out into a big grin. I know he's not going to deny her request. He nods and Ness grabs his hand, tugging until he begins to follow her back out to the dance floor.

I allow my eyes to flick up, in search of Lillah, noticing she's left her little dance group as well and is walking to me. I meet her half way, my hands extended as a slow song begins to play. Lillah places her hand in mine and I pull her into my arms, keeping a bit of distance between us and the others so I can have her all to myself. Having her sway in my arms is the best feeling in the world. Her arms circle me tightly and my hands slip down her back, over the smooth fabric of her dress until they rest just at the top of the curve of her ass. Lillah cuddles closer to me and I use my hands to pull her hips into mine. I'm not trying to grind into her on the dance floor but the feeling of her soft, curvy body molded to mine is too much to resist.

Lillah sighs deeply and places a kiss on the underside of my jaw, where the little bit of stubble has begun to grow back even though I shaved this morning like Rachel requested. I use my chin to tease the silky skin of her neck and she giggles in my ear. The sound makes my heart clench and gives me hope that the rest of the night will go well. I kiss the spot I scratched then whisper next to her ear, "I love you."

She pulls away and looks up at me, a beautiful smile on her face, "I love you, too." My heart soars and I know I will never get tired of hearing her say those words to me.

I place a hand on the side of her face, glancing over her head then back down, "When do you think Rachel will allow us to leave?" Lillah laughs lightly and nibbles on her bottom lip. _I want to nibble on that lip_. "I'm thinking it'll be at least another hour before she gets tired of not 'having Paul naked'." My eyebrows shoot up when I hear her words. "Her words! Not mine!" Lillah explains hurriedly and I chuckle. _Sounds like something Rachel would say._

"I guess that's ok for now. I don't mind holding you in my arms for a little while longer," I pause and frown slightly as Lillah snuggles back against me. "As a matter of fact, I don't ever want to let you go. I want you in my arms always," I tell her softly. This time one of my hands is buried in Lillah's hair and the other is resting, once again, in the dip at the base of her spine. Her arms thread around my waist and her face rests against my chest. We are barely swaying to the music and I'm pretty sure that we aren't moving with the beat at all, but I don't care. The only thing I can focus on is Lillah; her smell, her soft body, and the way she relaxes me when she's so close.

I allow my face to drop down and rest on top of her head and my eyes drift shut. I'm in tune to her every move and breath, so much so that my breathing syncs with hers after a few minutes. My body begins to react in other places too and I try to derail the hard-on that develops. I don't want Lillah thinking I'm taking advantage of this new situation. I know we have a lot to talk about when we get home. The last thing I want is for it to be pushed aside for sexual gratification. Talking to Lillah, coming clean about everything I've been hiding from her, will be the most important part of the night.

Surprisingly, Lillah presses her hips into mine, rubbing against me and making my dick twitch. I groan her name quietly and Lillah snickers into the shirt of my tux. I drop a kiss on her temple and concentrate on breathing in through my nose and out of my mouth. I can't let myself get too worked up; I need to stay focused.

The music ends and in the quiet before the next song begins we can all clearly hear Rachel screaming at Paul, "What do you mean you knew all along? Was I the last one to find out Embry imprinted on my best friend?"

Lillah pulls her head from my chest, looking up at me with narrowed eyes, "We definitely have more to talk about. Who all knew about you imprinting?"

"Yeah, _Embry_, who all knew about you imprinting?" Rachel is standing beside me now, tapping her foot in an agitated rhythm.

Jacob approaches, pulling Rachel back slowly, "Relax, Rachel. Embry told all of the wolves at the last meeting, but he asked us not to share it with anyone else."

Emily steps beside Rachel, "Jacob, we understand, but you guys have known for over a month. You couldn't tell us any time before now?"

"The last meeting?" Lillah looks up at me and I can already see flecks of anger building in her eyes, "The night before the football game?" I nod slowly, knowing she isn't going to be happy about this information. "You made them keep secrets from their imprints too? For over a month?"

"I just didn't want you to find out from someone other than me. I wasn't sure then if I was ever going to tell you," I whisper, cringing as I admit to two of the many stupid things I did in the beginning.

Rachel stomps her foot beside me, "You didn't trust us to keep your secret?"

"You didn't even know for sure and yet you practically told her every chance you got that you thought I had imprinted on her," I growl at her, pulling Lillah behind me as I turn to face Rachel. "You bet I didn't trust you."

"I did a good job keeping the secret, right Quily?" Claire pipes up from behind Rachel and we all turn in surprise.

Looking over Rachel's shoulder to Quil I see him holding a tired Claire in his arms, "You told her?"

"She asked me weeks ago. I don't keep secrets from her, so I told her the truth," Quil shrugs his shoulders.

Sam glares over at Quil for me, "Quil, that wasn't for you to decide on your own, even if she asked you. You should have come to me before telling her that."

"Oh my God, Claire knew before I did?" Rachel shrieks before me. Looking around the room she screams, "Raise your hand if you _didn_'t know about Embry imprinting on Lillah before tonight."

Rachel lifts her hand, along with Emily, Kim and a few of the other guys' imprintees. Noticeably, Ness and Claire both have their hands down. Rachel rounds on Jacob, "Ness knew?"

"I told her before Embry asked us not to tell," Jacob shrugs.

Rachel roars, turning around to walk off before Paul stops her. He grins down at her and whispers something in her ear. Next thing I know she's pulled Lillah and I into a hug. "I'm so excited for you two. I just wish you would have told all of us sooner." _What the hell did he say to her?_

"Don't worry, Rachel." When Lillah looks up at me, she's smiling but there's something underneath that smile that tells me I'm in serious trouble. "He's going to get a piece of my mind later for making everyone keep his secret."

Rachel grins as she steps back, "That makes me feel much better. Really chew him out. If you are lucky, he'll fight back." Rachel sighs as she turns to Paul, "I love angry sex."

Shaking my head at the absurdity that is Paul and Rachel's relationship, I pull Lillah back into my arms, but she is stiff. Looking down I see her cheeks are bright pink and she's looking up at the top of the tent. Chuckling slightly at her embarrassment I whisper against her ear, "You can chew me out all you want, you have a right to. I won't fight back and I won't ever have angry sex with you."

She gulps in air then whispers as she exhales, "Will you ever change your mind about- that?"

I'm so shocked I don't realize I'm speaking in a normal voice when I respond, "You want to have angry sex?"

The room erupts in laughter as Lillah's face turns bright red. "That's it," I shout out at the room at large, "we're out of here." Growling, I take her hand, pulling her off the dance floor. Sam catches up with me as we pause at the table, grabbing my elbow to stop our movement. "What?"

Sam releases me, "Don't bite my head off, I just need to get the car seats out of Lillah's car before you two leave."

"Oh." Lillah hands me the keys to the car and I kiss her nose, once again wrapping her up in my jacket, "Stay in here where it's warm, I'll pull the car around."

"Ok," she takes a seat, quickly joined by Kim and Emily, who is now holding a sleeping Eli.

Jared follows Sam and I out and when I glance back at him questioningly he shrugs, "Kim gets tired quickly these days, and this has been a long day for her."

"It's been a long day for all of us," Sam grumbles as he pulls first Claire's booster, then Eli's car seat out of the Acura. He grins at me once he has both seats secured back in the Suburban, "Make sure you remember to come to work on Monday."

"I'll be there, but only because Lillah has to work too on Monday," I smirk to myself. _At least, I hope that things go in that direction._ Sam laughs and waves as he starts up the Suburban.

Jared shouts out the window, "Have fun finally making love to your imprint, Saint Embry."

Rolling my eyes I pull the Acura up behind Sam's Suburban, jumping out of the car to go get Lillah. When I walk back into the tent it looks like everyone is hugging. Standing back, I watch as Lillah frees herself, followed by Kim, Emily holding Eli and Quil holding Claire. When Lillah looks up at me, I'm surprised to see all of the makeup removed from her face. There are a few tissues on the table behind them and I'm guessing the girls helped her to remove most of that stuff while I was getting the car. Before I can ask, Rachel is running up to me, hugging me again as she whispers, "Be good to her."

"I will, I promise, Rach." Rachel steps back, smiling.

Paul steps around Rachel, but he's frowning, even growling at me as Lillah approaches, "I can't believe you fucking gave us money. I told you I didn't want it. I'm tearing this check up."

Taking Lillah by the hand, I shrug at him, "Do what you want with the check, just thought you might need some extra cash for your honeymoon. But you might want to check with your bride first," glancing down at Lillah I grin, "I've learned recently our women don't like it when we make decisions about money without consulting them first."

Turning around, I finally lead Lillah out of the tent. I can hear a few cat-calls behind me, but I ignore them as I help her into the passenger seat. Unable to resist touching her, my hand intentionally slides over the swell of her breast as I buckle her seat belt. A shiver moves over her body as she whispers my name softly. Leaning in I brush my lips over hers slowly, speaking in-between kisses, "I. Love. You. Lillah. Hunter."

She giggles, returning my kisses before slowly pulling back, "I love you, too, but that doesn't mean you aren't in trouble."

"I know," I say, sighing, as I close her door before running around to the driver's side. Once the car is moving I look over at her as I pick up our conversation again, "You really want to have angry sex?" _Of course this would be the one thing my brain focuses on._

Lillah laughs loudly, shaking her head, "No, Embry, that isn't what I meant at all." Sobering up, she grabs my hand, holding it tightly between her two as she speaks low but clear enough for me to hear, "I meant will you ever change your mind about us having sex?"

Taking my hand back slowly from her I slide it in my pocket, pulling out the row of condoms Jared gave me earlier. Holding them up for her to see I do my best to hold back my laughter, "Does this answer your question?"

"Embry!" Lillah gasps, grabbing my hand and pulling it closer to her. Dropping the condoms in her lap I cup her cheek, turning to her slowly once I pull up to a stop sign. Making sure no one is behind me, I put the Acura in park and pull her close enough to kiss her. Our tongues happily meet and I have to remind myself that this is not the time, since we are in a car and I want to clear the air completely before making love with her.

Pulling back slowly I speak against her lips, "Lillah, it has taken everything in me not to make love with you. I wanted to, more than you know, but I couldn't do that. I couldn't pretend it was just sex, because nothing we have ever done has been just sex, or just fooling around. Being with you was the only way I could think to show you how I really felt."

"Oh Embry," Lillah unbuckles her seat belt, moving to her knees to wrap her arms around my neck, kissing me wherever she can reach. "You are the only man I ever want to have touch me. I want you to be my first and last." Leaning back she lets her fingernails move over my jaw, "You know you could have had me weeks ago, right?"

"That was a line I refused to cross." Shaking my head I explain when I see her twist her head in question, "Even before I knew I loved you, I wanted to make love with you; but I promised myself I wouldn't do that. Then when I realized, I couldn't take your virginity; couldn't make you mine forever, unless you loved me in return. I also knew I couldn't allow myself to have you until you knew the truth and accepted me."

Lillah sighs, leaning over to kiss me softly, "That was very sweet of you, Embry but really unnecessary. I wanted to be with you, even if it meant I couldn't have you always. I was willing to take the risk even if I had to let you go eventually. A few moments of bliss, where I could show you how I felt, would have been worth the heartache."

I take a second to process her words and try to control my growing arousal. The last thing I want is for the rest of the night to be rushed but I know I can't possibly refuse either of us now. She settles back into her seat when I continue driving us home but she leans close enough to me so that we are still touching. The drive is mostly quiet except for a few times when we talk about the little bits of the wedding we remember.

When we finally reach the house, I pull into the garage and release my seat belt, turning to look at her. "Can you forgive me for keeping this from you, Lillah? Can you accept my imprint?" I hold my breath without realizing it, almost scared she might reconsider me now that she knows the truth.

Lillah's eyes focus on mine for what seems like entirely too long. I'm afraid she's weighing her options heavily now that she's had more time to think about it. When she finally speaks, I hang on her every word, "Embry, I love you. I love you so much I don't think I could have recovered from losing you, had it come to that. I know that sounds dramatic but it's true. I never loved anyone the way I love you. There could never be anyone else for me." Her hands cup my face and she places her lips against mine, whispering against my mouth, "Take me inside and make love to me, please? I want nothing more than to be yours, forever."

-0-

**A/N:** It's incredibly hard for us to believe that we've only been working on this story since January of this year and only started posting it in March. We didn't have any clue how many chapters it would end up being and we certainly never _dreamed_ that people would love these two as much as we do. It blows our minds every time a review comes in and to see that number rising is just unreal. We wanted to write Lillah and Embry's tale for _us_ because we couldn't get them out of our heads. The fact that others enjoy it just as much as we do is just icing on the cupcake. Thank you, to the repeat reviewers and those that read every single chapter and have stuck with us through this whole tale- through the sadness, frustration, smut, happiness... everything. We appreciate your words and thoughts more than you know.

But don't worry, there is still much more in store for these two! See y'all next Tuesday... for some "FINALLY!" *wink*

A quick shout out to Yzak Lover Extrodinaire for her wonderful Rachel line of "Holy crack on a crack whore!" Been saving that one for a while, glad we were finally able to use it!

**Beta Note: **Effing cock block


	35. Chapter 35 Giving Me Love

**Chapter 35 "Giving Me Love"**

**Disclaimer:** SM did fade to black. Sure, we gave you a cliffhanger, but we pick right up where we left off. Clearly, we aren't her.  
**  
A/N:** Read on, we won't distract you with an A/N right now. :)

_You're love's a permanent distraction,  
A perfect interaction  
A feeling so extreme  
I lost my appetite to eat, and I barely get to sleep  
Cause you're even in my dreams  
And I thought that I was strong but I knew that all along,  
This was out of my control  
So I fell into your hands, and I don't know where we'll land,  
I'm just going with the flow_

_Giving me  
Love, Love, Love, Love, Love  
More than I ever need_  
"Love, Love, Love" - Hope

**LPOV**

Embry doesn't say anything after I ask him to make love to me. He sits their quietly, just smiling at me, before finally getting out of the car. I move to open my door just as he's there, unbuckling my seat belt and pulling me into his arms. Unable to hide my excitement, I giggle, wrapping my arms around his neck, "I take it that's a 'yes'?"

He easily carries me into the kitchen, but stops, sitting me on the counter top. Stepping between my legs, he pulls me forward until I can feel him hard against me as he speaks, "You better believe it's a 'yes', a thousand times 'yes'. I'm going to make love to you every night, possibly every morning, and every chance I get in between; for the rest of our lives." Wrapping my legs around him I meet his lips as they descend toward mine. This kiss is more intense than anything we have ever shared, and I feel like we are both pouring all our love into this one kiss.

Embry only stops when, embarrassing as it is, my stomach grumbles in anger. He slowly pulls back, cupping my face, "When was the last time you ate?"

Thinking back over the day I don't recall eating at all. I skipped breakfast because I was so excited to meet Emily this morning. Then after our talk and the letter, my nerves were too shot to even think about putting food in my mouth. During dinner I thought my world was falling apart around me so fast that the idea of food made me want to throw up.

"Last night," I admit, knowing Embry isn't going to be happy with my response.

He steps back from me, laughing as he opens the refrigerator, "Sandwich? Omelet?" He grins as he glances over at me, "Emily's chocolate cake?"

"Mmmm, definitely need a slice of cake and I think a turkey sandwich," I giggle when Embry closes the refrigerator door with just a bottle of water in his hands. He holds the water out and tells me to take it, then he pulls me against his chest again, moving me to sit at the kitchen table. Shaking my head as he walks away I can't help but laugh, "You know, I haven't see any of the other guys carrying their- imprints around everywhere." It feels so weird, and yet so right, to call myself Embry's imprint.

He places a slice of chocolate cake in front of me, his smile the happiest I've ever seen it, "Dessert first tonight." Looking at the cake my heart thumps with happiness as I remember my birthday wish from just yesterday. _It came true._ I really will get to be with Embry forever. I want to cry I'm so happy, but Embry laughing pulls my attention back to him.

"Trust me, it happens." I mean to savor the cake, but I'm so hungry I finish it off before Embry is even finished making my sandwich. He glances up when I put the fork down on the plate, grinning as he speaks, "Jared was the worst in the early years, but Sam got in the habit of carrying Emily after the accident. According to Quil, Sam still carries Emily up to bed every night."

I'm quiet as he finishes making the food. I take slow sips from the bottle of water as I review the last month in my mind based on everything Embry told me tonight. So many of the things he said and did now make complete sense. _He found my coat in the diner because he really did recognize my scent. He marked my neck to show those student's that I was "his". And he was _knowingly_ vague whenever the subject of imprinting would come up._ As happy as I am right now, I'm still upset that he kept this from me for _so_ long.

He sets a plate with a sandwich and chips in front of me, sitting quietly beside me. When I look at him he smiles sadly which breaks my heart, "What's wrong?"

"Nothing, I'm being stupid," he says, trying to blow it off, but I refuse to let him do that any longer.

Standing from my chair I move to sit in his lap. He's obviously surprised by this move, but doesn't complain. Kissing his forehead I take a deep breath, speaking as sternly as I can without upsetting him further, "Embry, new rule in this relationship: no more half-truths or holding back stuff to protect me. I'm not asking for much, I just need to be able to trust you, and I can't do that unless I know you will be completely honest with me going forward. We are in this together; partners, equals. Deal?"

He slowly nods his head then agrees to the deal. Once he agrees, I push back on him, looking for the truth about what was going through his mind. He takes my plate and offers me a bite of the sandwich as he explains, "It really is stupid. I know you're angry, and you have every right to be. It's just- now that you know everything, I keep expecting the other shoe to drop. Like I'm going to say something and you'll kick me out, or I'll wake up tomorrow to you telling me you want Carter back."

"Are you _kidding_ me?" I choke back my laughter at the absurdity of his statement, "Em, baby, I'm _never_ going back to Carter." My thumb slides over his lips, feeling how smooth they are as I remind him, "Trust me, I understand living in fear that everything you love could be taken away in an instant."

Embry's head drops to my shoulder and I can just make out his words, "I know, I'm so sorry, baby. The idea that you were sad or hurt at any point kills me."

Shaking my head, I remind myself I'm still angry and he owes me an explanation for all of these secrets, "Why didn't you just tell me, Embry? Why did it have to be this big secret?"

Embry takes a deep breath and lifts his head, his eyes even sadder now than before. He sets the plate down on the table and offers me the rest of the sandwich, "You eat, I'll explain." Nodding I take the sandwich in my hand, nibbling at it as he holds me close, speaking softly, "I didn't want to imprint, Lillah. Not because it was you, I just didn't want to ever imprint. I was content with my life and after losing my mom, I didn't want another woman depending on me. Watching the cancer take over her- I never wanted to see someone I love go through that. So I figured I just wouldn't love anyone else. It worked fine, until you came into my life.

"When it happened- I thought I could stop it, or ignore you. I didn't even know your name and yet I couldn't get you out of my mind. I didn't tell the guys it had happened right away, thinking maybe if I didn't admit it then I could avoid it. Billy, of course, knew instantly." He gives me a small smile as I finish off the sandwich, "In fact, he left imprinting out on purpose when we were all at his house. Normally when he's telling someone new about us he explains imprinting, but he didn't that day, because he knew what had happened to me. He left it up to me to explain to you."

"Which you conveniently waited over a month to get around to," I said, raising an eyebrow at him.

He gives me a look full of remorse, "I did wait, and I will never forgive myself for that." He pauses, watching me. I know he regrets keeping this from me. I want answers but I can't stay mad at him; I've never been able to remain angry at him. _I guess that is just one more side effect of imprinting. _Nodding slowly, I pop a chip in my mouth to show I'll be quiet as he starts speaking again, "Once he let me leave his house I phased, needing to clear my mind. I was heading toward the cliffs, thinking about how just your scent turned me on when I realized I had followed your scent to the beach.

"When Emily saw me at the beach, she figured it out too. She confronted me about it that night, but I- I lied to her, told her I hadn't imprinted."

I'm shocked at this admission, "You lied to Emily? Embry, how could you do that?"

"Because I was stupid. I made a lot of bad decisions early on, Lillah, and for that, I can't apologize enough," he exhales before resting his forehead against mine.

Leaning back I look him in the eye, shaking my head, "You don't need to apologize to me; you need to apologize to Emily."

"I did, earlier tonight," he sighs, looking at the plate that now only holds chips. "Do you want another sandwich?"

"No, I'll finish off the chips, you explain why you lied to Emily and made the guys keep this a secret."

I move to grab a chip, but Embry pulls my hand down, "I don't want you to choke when I say this." Setting the chip down I take a deep breath, trying to prepare myself to hear the truth. I'm so glad I know he loves me, otherwise, I'm not sure I could handle hearing all this now. He looks me in the eyes as he speaks, "Once I admitted to the packs that I had imprinted, I decided I wasn't going to accept you."

I'm glad he stopped me from eating, because I can't catch my breath at his words. Needing to stand, I move from his lap, walking around the kitchen a few times to let his words sink in. _He wasn't going to accept me? He wasn't going to accept me. At all._ The idea of not having him in my life scares me beyond words. Then I realize exactly what he said and I feel my irritation rise. Finally I step back in front of him, "_You_ decided? Why didn't _I_ get a say in this?"

"We were barely talking at the time, Lillah. As far as I knew, you were just Rachel's teacher friend that lived in the big house in Forks. No way would you ever want to be with me. I'm sorry, I know I shouldn't have made assumptions about you, but I didn't know better then," Embry sighs looking away from me.

Grabbing his face I turn him back to look at me, "We might have been barely talking, but you had already kissed me and you were watching me from the woods as I ran. I should have had a say in that decision, Embry." Shaking my head I move to sit in my seat next to him. Glancing up at him I whisper, "How could you _decide_ you weren't going to accept me, then the next day make out with me under the stands at the football game and ask me to be friends?"

"Because as much as I didn't want an imprint, I was pretty much in hell at that point. I didn't _want_ to accept you, but I was willing to try anything, even being friends, to find some peace," Embry flinches slightly.

"What do you mean? What was going on?" I'm so confused by all of this. I forgot how painful that time was, him acting like he hated me hurt so much; remembering is bringing back some of the pain I felt then.

He slides his chair next to mine, pulling me against his side as he kisses the top of my head. Pulling back, he looks down at me, "Remember what Quil said last week? About how if we don't see our imprints every day it effects us; we start to have nightmares?" Slowly nodding my head I realize Quil was trying to tell me all this last week. Embry clears his throat, grabbing my attention again, "The week between when I imprinted and the first night I stayed here was probably the worst week of my life. I did my best not to sleep, that's why I took on Sam and Jacob's patrol shifts. The few hours I would sleep, I had every kind of dream and nightmare about you imaginable."

My head shoots up, shocked by this admission, "You really dreamed about me right away? I thought it was just me. I mean- the things I was dreaming Embry, they seemed so real. That's why I thought I was dreaming when we first kissed. It felt exactly like the dreams I had the night before."

His jaw is tight as he speaks, obviously upset by all of this too, "Every time I closed my eyes, I saw you, but it wasn't just sexual. There were some scary ass nightmares mixed in too. I can't tell you the number of dreams I had where you were laughing in my face, telling me you could never be with someone like me."

"What?" Climbing into his lap I hold him close, whispering, "Why didn't you tell me this?" Leaning back from him my fingers tug on his hair gently.

"How do you tell someone 'By the way, I keep dreaming that you think you can do better than me.' when you are the one pushing them away?" He looks away, whispering, "Even once we were friends, I didn't want to become too attached, in case you left me."

"Embry," I kiss him briefly, trying to reassure him before shaking his head slightly in frustration, "What have I ever done to make you think I would leave, even in your dreams?"

He eyes still won't meet mine as he answers, "You didn't do anything. I just-," Embry shakes his head, not able to finish his sentence.

Sliding my hands to his cheeks I pull his head up to look at me. My heart aches for him when I see how much pain he's in; before me is the scared little boy Nayeli described in her letter. Kissing him gently I can feel tears forming as I speak, "The only place I ever want to be is with you, I love you."

He shakes his head but I can still see the hurt in his eyes. Twisting my arms behind his head I rest my cheek against his, whispering, "Tell me. Why didn't you want to become too attached?"

I can't see his eyes but his words tell me everything I need to know. "Everyone I love leaves me. I thought if I could keep you at arm's length you'd stick around, but if I fell in love with you, you'd leave me. I know it's stupid," his voice trails off.

Tears are falling down my face, realizing just how hurt he has been all these years. He such a strong man but he's kept everything bottled up, never feeling. I'm suddenly amazed that he even admitted he loves me. Based on what I now know from both him and his mom, I can't imagine how hard that was for him.

Sliding my cheek across his I can feel the stubble there and it makes me smile. One time I mentioned I liked his stubble and he kept it for me. He's changed so much in the last month, I'm shocked by the difference in him when I think back. My fingers find the silky strands at the top of his head as I continue to move my cheek slowly over his, "Embry, we both read the letter, and she didn't want to leave you. If you haven't figured it out yet, let me be clear; you're stuck with me. I'm not going anywhere as long as I'm alive."

Embry moves me back, his eyes darting back and forth between mine, "Promise?"

"I promise." As soon as the words are out of my mouth, Embry's lips are on mine. His kiss is raw and hungry, his tongue immediately moving against mine when I open my mouth to him. I want him, so much, but I still need answers. He is shocked when I break our kiss but I'm quick to reassure him, "Soon." Pushing a piece of his hair back behind his ear I grin, "We have the rest of our lives to make love. I still need some answers, baby."

He takes a deep breath, kissing me one more time before speaking, "What else do you want to know?"

"When did you change your mind about accepting me? _What_ changed your mind?"

"_You_ changed my mind. I fought it, every step of the way, but every time I thought I had reached my limit, you were right there beside me; supporting me, pushing me, and loving me. You accepted me without knowing anything about the imprint." He smiles softly at me, and I can't resist kissing him, but I pull back quickly. His thumb brushes over my cheek as he continues, "I don't know when exactly I changed my mind, but as soon as you agreed to being friends, I was a goner. I loved you the moment I saw you, but it took you to make me realize that."

With those words, I no longer care about answers. The past is the past; all that matters is I love Embry and he loves me. I want to start loving him, healing his heart; not worry about why he was afraid to tell me before. Grabbing his hands, I twist my fingers with his, looking at him with my best serious face, "Have you now told me 'everything'?"

"I think so, but if you have any other questions, I'll answer." Embry's eyes are locked with mine and I can see that he is nervous still.

"I just have one more question," I sigh. He tilts his head, taking a gulp of air as he waits for me to speak. Smiling as I lean forward I kiss his chin and nose before dropping kisses on his beautiful lips. Meeting his eyes I inhale before speaking as confidently as possible, given the question on my mind, "Will you please make love with me?"

His chest sinks as a whoosh of air escapes his mouth, "Really? Nothing else?"

"I have a ton more questions but they don't matter. What matters is that we love each other," Embry is standing up before I even finish talking. He's holding me against his chest, peppering kisses all over my face as he carries me to the bedroom. He gently places me on the bed then returns to close the bedroom door. As he walks back, he's removing his bow tie and unbuttoning his shirt; moving to meet him on the edge of the bed I stop his hands as they reach the bottom button, "Let me."

Embry's hands drop to his sides and I finish unbuttoning his tux shirt so I can push it open to reveal his rippling tan skin. I reach down, unbuttoning the cuffs of his shirt then move my hands up his abs and chest. My movements are slow; I need to savor these moments now that it's finally here. Pushing his shirt off of his shoulders I allow it to hit the floor as I place kisses on his hot flesh. I've been wanting this, waiting for what seems like so long that it's hard for me to believe it's finally happening.

"You are so beautiful, do you know that?" I ask, looking up at him with a soft smile on my face.

Embry grins sheepishly at me, the dimple in his chin flashing, "You are beautiful, Lillah Hunter- the most beautiful creature I've ever laid eyes on. Imprintee or not," he tells me as he lifts a hand to run it through my hair. "I would have fallen in love with you, even if I were just an ordinary man."

His words send a thrill through me and I reach up to pull him down to kiss my lips. He doesn't linger too long and when he pulls away again I run my finger tips down his abs to the waist band of his pants. Loosening the hook takes me some time because my hands are beginning to shake; not out of fear, but desire.

Embry allows me to take my time, his patience surprising me as I finally release the catch and begin to pull the zipper down. I push the waist band of his pants over his hips, my hands gliding along the boxers that cover his butt until the black fabric falls to the floor, joining his shirt. I find it hard to pull my eyes away from his obvious erection. It's not as if I've never seen him naked before, but this time is different; I know what is going to take place. He seems larger than before; probably due to my anxiety over him fitting without too much discomfort. I want to enjoy this time with him, not fear it.

"We have all night, baby. Don't be scared," Embry's voice surprises me; I look up at him, realizing I've paused in my exploration and probably look panicked. "I'll never hurt you. We can go as slow as you need to."

I nod my head before moving off the bed so he can help me out of my dress. Embry steps back but when I stand in front of him he surprises me, placing his hands on my hips, pulling me in for a hug. This simple gesture calms me and gives me strength; he places soft kisses on my neck before allowing me to step back. Taking a deep breath, I reach down, pulling one of his hands up to the side zipper on my dress, placing his fingers there so he can pull it down.

"You look amazing," he tells me quietly as he grips the small piece of metal and begins to drag it toward my waist. "I couldn't take my eyes off of you all night. You were the most beautiful woman there."

"Thank you, but don't tell Rachel or Paul that," he grins at my words while I keep my eyes on his face, watching every emotion play across it. Embry looks focused and intense as he unzips my dress before moving his hands up my arms to my shoulders. He slips his fingers under the straps and pulls them down over my shoulders, slowly revealing the swell of my breasts. I'm so thankful Rachel included lingerie in the shopping excursion with the girls a few weeks ago. I'm wearing the plunging bra and thong she picked out that day, and it dawns on me that Embry has never seen me in anything like this before.

He inhales a gasp as he pushes the dress down to my waist, revealing the black lace bra. I glance down, then back up and the scorching heat I see in his gaze takes my breath away. His eyes flick up to mine as a low growl vibrates his chest, sending a shiver up my spine and causing my nipples to pucker. Embry's hands move up my torso until he's cupping my breasts, his thumbs running over the buds at the tip. I can't help the moan that escapes my throat or the rush of arousal between my legs as he rubs the lacy fabric against my skin. I look up into his face, as he licks his lips, watching the movements of his hands.

"I thought you weren't a boob man, Em?" I say to him, my voice hoarse with emotions but I still manage a giggle at the awe inspired look on his face.

"I told you," he glances up at me then back down, "I'm a _Lillah_ man. You do have fantastic tits though." I blush at his impassioned words but it sends goose bumps all over my body. He looks up at me and his face holds a sheepish smile, as if he's just realized what he's said to me.

I grin at him and cup his face in my hands, pulling him toward me so I can kiss his lips. As his tongue moves against mine his hands gently massage my breasts. Before I realize what he's going to do, he uses his thumb and forefinger to gently pinch and pull on each of my nipples; I gasp into his mouth and he chuckles into mine. Pulling away from the kiss so I can take a breath, I allow my head to drop back as a chill runs through my body.

He leans forward and kisses my neck, flicking his tongue out to taste my skin before I lift my head to look at him. His hands move from my breasts to my waist, where he begins to push the skirting of my dress down over my hips. I watch as it drifts to the floor to join his pants and shirt; when I look back my eyes travel up his legs and hard-on. I'm fascinated as I see it move slightly and my eyes jerk up to his face. His eyes are glued on the panties that match my bra- a lacy thong that Rachel insisted I 'needed'. It makes me a little bit antsy to have Embry staring like this. I own more revealing panties, sure, but Embry has never seen me wear them.

His hand shoots out and slides over my hip, a finger curling beneath the thin strip of fabric there. Embry twists his fingers in the fabric and I think he's going to rip it at first; instead, he pulls me to him, our bodies pressing against one another. He wraps his arms around my waist and whispers to me, "I love you." I grin up at him, repeating his words while he reaches around to unhook my bra. He pulls back, allowing my bra to fall away from my body, grinning when my breasts bounce free.

He leans around me and pulls the bed covering back; his motion causes the back of my knees to hit the edge of the bed and I am forced to sit. He follows me as I scoot back, crawling on his hands and knees. I watch the muscles beneath his smooth skin move as he shifts his body. _This is really happening. Really, really happening_.

He places his hand on my ankle and begins to run it up my leg, caressing my calf, tickling the back of my knee then moving up my thigh. Chills are covering my skin once again, and the closer he comes to the place I want him to touch me most, the more my stomach tightens. He places both hands on my hips and hooks his fingers under the elastic of my panties. He looks up at me, asking for permission to discard them and I nod my head slightly. I'm not sure why I'm nervous now when he's seen me this way many times before, but knowing we are finally going to make love changes everything.

Embry pulls my panties down over my hips, my thighs and the rest of the way down my legs until he's pulling them off, tossing them over his shoulder. I giggle lightly at the over-exaggerated toss he gives the flimsy piece of lace and he grins down at me. "How did I get so lucky?" He asks and tears spring to my eyes.

"I'm the lucky one," I tell him softly and reach up to touch his handsome face. His eye lids flutter a little at my touch; just before they close entirely, his eyes pop open to focus on me. I watch him as he runs his eyes over my face, down my neck, over my breasts and torso. His face drops down and he begins placing erratic kisses on my skin; my neck, collar bone then to my breast, where he moves over to my nipple, kissing and teasing around it. I lift my chest from the mattress, arching my back, begging for more until he flicks his tongue out to circle my pert nipple.

I whisper his name as he pulls my flesh into his mouth, shooting waves of pleasure through my body. My fingers slide down his back, holding on to him tight as he teases me. When he lifts his head, he has a very cocky grin on his face. Tugging at his face, my lips brush against his as I speak, "Embry, we are going to make love tonight, please take off your boxers. I want to be able to feel you- all of you _no_ barriers."

Something about what I said panics him, because next thing I know, he's on the other side of the bed, reaching for his pants. Trying not to think I did something wrong, I move my hand toward his arm, trying to grab his attention, "What?"

"I forgot the condoms in the car," he kisses my forehead then turns back to pulling on his pants.

Closing my eyes, I sit there for just a moment, thinking as quickly as I can. When I decide I want to ask, I move to the edge of the bed, grabbing his hand just as he finishes buttoning his pants, "Embry. Stop."

"I'll be right back, Lills. I'm sure they just fell out of your lap in the car. Give me two seconds," he grins at me but stops when I don't grin back. "What?"

Resolving myself that he does love me and we are going to be together forever, I pull on all my strength as I look up at him, my tone as sure as I can make it, "What if- I mean- I- I would be ok not using them."

Embry doesn't say anything, just looks at me for what feels like hours. He pulls me to stand up, the pounding of my heart causing my breasts to jump against his warm skin. Finally, he pushes my hair back, tilting my chin to look deep into my eyes, "You aren't on the pill, are you?" When I reluctantly shake my head no, he sighs softly, "Lillah, you know the risk you're taking, right? It only takes one time for you- for us to get pregnant."

"I know." His change of words, from "you" to "us" getting pregnant makes my decision easy. Lifting on my toes, I pull him down to me, "I want that, with you. I want a family Embry and unless you object, I'm happy with starting now. It doesn't hurt to try; there are no guarantees it could happen right away."

"There are no guarantees it _won't_ happen right away. Lills-," he hesitates for just a second, almost like he's deciding what to tell me. When I push him, he finally continues, "Lills, part of imprinting is continuing the line of wolves. So far it's been a pretty immediate thing. Kim was only off the pill a couple of days before she got pregnant; Emily skipped two days and she got pregnant."

"How do you know that?" Embry's face is very serious, and I'm shocked he knows these details.

He taps his head but then also says, "Plus Paul told me." Taking a deep breath, he whispers, "Lillah, you need to be really sure of this decision. You can't take it back. It's a very real possibility that if we don't use a condom tonight, in nine months we will be parents."

My hands move to my stomach, closing my eyes I try to imagine the possibility. It thrills me so much, it's my every dream come true. Opening my eyes I smile up at him, "I've never been more sure of anyone or anything in all my life." Suddenly my face falls as I realize we've only talked about what _I_ want, "Unless you don't want-"

Embry's fingers on my mouth cut me off before he gives me a real smile, "I want to have kids with you, Lills. If you're ready now, then so am I."

"Good." Wrapping my arms around his neck, I kiss all over his face, smiling as I speak, "Because if we are going to have six kids like you want, we need to get started early."

"You would really want six kids?" Embry looks shocked, but happy.

Shrugging, I grin up at him, "We can start with one and see where life takes us."

His hands wrap around my waist, but instead of pulling me against him like he normally does, his hands push me back slightly. Even with his eyes closed he suddenly looks nervous, but then they open and he's speaking, watching my face closely, "I have one condition, Lillah."

"Sure, anything, Em." I feel like dancing I'm so excited; not only will I get to be with him completely, but we can start working on creating our family; our future.

"We have to get married, soon."

My breath catches as my heart speeds up to double time. I'm so shocked by his request that I can't say anything. My mind had skipped right over that part; I was so relieved to know I wouldn't lose him, that he had actually imprinted on _me_, I didn't even think about marriage. The hurtle of being together had already been jumped as far as I was concerned, I was moving on to the next step. Trust in my Wolf Charming to remember that little detail.

Moving forward so we are once again touching, I start kissing the first patch of his skin I reach, slowly progressing up his chest and neck until I reach his mouth. Pausing, I look him in the eye as I whisper, "Embry, I'll marry you right now if you want."

"Nothing that immediate," his smile fills his face, his eyes dancing with joy, "just soon. I want you to have your dream wedding,"

"As long as I'm marrying you, it _will_ be my dream wedding," I sigh against his lips. I want to pinch myself to make sure this is real, it feels like such a dream; but I don't have time before Embry scoops me up in his arms.

I can't help the nervous giggle that escapes when he places me in the middle of the bed then leans back. I can feel him watching me, but I can't move my eyes from his hands at his hips. He easily removes his pants, which again leaves just his boxers. His erection is still very evident beneath the thin fabric that covers him. When he doesn't move I finally manage to drag my eyes up his torso to meet his. He slowly crawls onto the bed, his body hovering over mine as he nuzzles my neck. Chills move down my spine at the combination of his lips, teeth, tongue and scruffy chin against my skin. When he reaches my ear he whispers, "You can remove my boxers whenever you're ready- If you're sure."

I run my hands up his back, gently sliding my finger nails along his toned skin until he looks up at me. We stare into each other's eyes as I move my hands down his back, along his spine until I reach the elastic of his boxers and am able to slip my finger tips just under the edge. "I'm sure, Embry. I love you more than I ever thought I could love someone. Don't ever forget that."

He places his lips against mine lightly then pulls away to look back down at me. I slip my hands a little further beneath his boxers until the elastic reaches my wrists then I stop. His tongue flicks out and when he licks his lips I shiver, imagining that mouth on me. I shift my hips and legs until he is between my thighs, but he doesn't rest his body against mine. I use my hands to push his boxers down over his ass then move forward so I can gently move the boxers over his erection. Once he springs free of the fabric, I can't do much of anything to rid him of the material so he helps me out; shedding them quickly, however still bracing himself so that we aren't touching, which frustrates me.

My hands move over his chest, shoulders and down his back and I press my fingertips into his skin, tugging him down to me. Instead of complying to my unspoken request, he drops his face to kiss me; it starts gentle but quickly turns into more, sending my body back into high alert. I break away, gasping for breath, "Please Embry, I want to feel you against me. I need your body against mine. I need you so bad." I hear him chuckle lightly before moving down to my neck, then the valley between my breasts, but he doesn't stop there. His lips move down my stomach, sucking and kissing their way down to my belly button before he looks up at me, his dark eyes hooded by his lashes.

"I've got something I want to do first, Lillah. We have all weekend and I plan to worship you completely." His words make my mouth go dry and I nod my head slowly as I watch his head dip down to kiss below my belly button then travel south. He doesn't waste time, moving to the top of my lips, making his way to my clit. Without thinking I try to rub my thighs together, desperate for friction but his hands shoot out and gently move my thighs apart. His lips latch onto me and I'm almost instantly transformed into a mumbling mess.

I've waited so long for him, needed him so much that I know it won't take him long to make me cum. He must know this as well because he doesn't ease up and before I know it, his tongue is stroking the inside of my lips, one of his hands having moved to hold me open for his mouth. He presses his thumb against my clit and I gasp for air, trying to say his name but unable to. He flattens his tongue against me then moves it up, slowly and agonizingly, until he reaches my clit. When he gently pulls my clit into his mouth, I'm gone, cumming before I can even blink.

My legs have fallen to the side of his head and he is still licking when I look down at him. Only then do I realize that his eyes are still on my face; out of everything, _that_ makes me blush. He kisses each of my thighs then lifts his face, moving his hand up to wipe his chin then lick what he's wiped away. I don't even know how it's possible, but my body reacts to the sight; I feel the dampness between my legs begin to build again and my body vibrates with anticipation.

"You taste so fucking good, baby," he tells me and my eyes go wide. "Sorry, it's the truth." This time he doesn't look shy at his outburst and that makes the entire thing even sexier. _I want this man so much I think I may lose my mind before I have him in me._

Finally he shifts and crawls back up my body; planting light kisses once more as he moves and then he's right there so that I can feel the heat his body radiates. I lift my legs, cradling as much of his body as I can until he slowly begins to lower himself against me. "I've never done this before, Lillah; I've never made love to someone," he surprises me by admitting and my eyes dart up to his. He looks vulnerable and I reach up to caress the sides of his face.

"Then please, let me be your first. Just as I want you to be mine," I tell him in a voice that is close to a whisper. My heart is constricting at his admission and I want nothing more than to bask in this new information. That is, until he finally rests his hips against the cradle of mine and my eyes squeeze shut. Immediately I try to lift my hips from the mattress, pressing up against his thick erection. I'm nervous and excited all in the same breath but he doesn't allow me to press further. Embry's hand shoots to my hip so that I know he doesn't wish for me to move. My eyes fly open and I look up into his face to realize that his own expression probably mirrors mine. Eyes fluttering shut; but he also looks like he's in pain and I realize that I've already had the chance to release some tension but he hasn't had that luxury. _He's probably in agony_.

I trail a hand down his chest and abs, seeking him with eager fingers. When I reach the base of his shaft, he hisses and his body shakes, but I don't stop until I have my hand wrapped around him. He is hot and hard and I almost laugh when we both moan at the same time. I only manage to pump my hand up and down a couple of times before he stops me, growling so low that I can't understand his words. He places his hand on top of mine and gently takes my wrist, pulling me away. He's buried his face in the side of my neck, sucking lightly at the space between my neck and shoulder, the spot he always goes for.

He runs a hand over my breast, down my stomach and lower until he reaches the juncture of my thighs. I gasp as his hands cup my wet lips and then his fingers slip into me. He lifts his head to look down at me and the fire in his eyes is scorching. "I can't wait to be inside of you, baby. Feeling you surround my cock; all hot, wet and tight. I might lose my mind, baby." I lift my head from the pillow and kiss his lips quickly upon hearing his words.

"There's no reason to stop, Embry, please, I need you," I tell him on a groan, lifting my hips up to meet his fingers as they move in and out of me with a torturous slowness. "I want you inside of me."

"I don't want to hurt you, Lills, but I know it's going to. I'm sorry," he whispers down at me and I roll my eyes just a little.

"That's sweet, Em, but I'm not going to break. It's only natural. You don't have to be so gentle, we've both waited for what seems like so long. Now stop talking and make love to me, please?" I practically beg him again and I watch his face for signs of uncertainty. He takes a deep breath, removing his fingers from my body and my hips jerk up, seeking him again. He lifts his hand, licking his fingers, causing my eyes to roll back in my head. _How does he keep doing this to me?_

Finally though, when I think that I might cry from the need I feel for him, he lowers his body on top of mine, bracing himself so that he doesn't put too much weight on me, but he's still allowing our bodies to touch. My nipples tingle against the light touch of his chest but the thing that really makes me react is his hot, hard length against my sex. I lift my hips, rubbing myself along his erection and I bite down on my lip at the incredible sensation it creates against my clit. As amazing as it feels, I can feel him tensing above me. Taking a deep breath, I slow my movements against him, lowering my hips back down to the mattress. His body follows mine and I can feel the tension begin to ease from him when our lips meet.

I can't contain my moan, tasting myself on him when my tongue flicks out to run along his lips. I feel him smiling when his lips press harder against mine, his tongue sliding into my mouth. He uses one arm to brace himself above me, but the other hand moves down to my breast. Pulling back slowly from our kiss, his teeth lightly nip at my lips as he slowly rolls my nipple between his thumb and forefinger. Unable to control myself, I gasp for breath and again arch my hips up to find him. He pulls back from me, which makes me groan until he again pulls my nipple into his mouth, his teeth biting down gently while his fingers pinch at the other.

If it were any other man, I would probably be embarrassed at the sounds that are coming from my mouth; but not with Embry. Instead, I hook one leg around his hip and push up against him, both of us crying out when we feel him against my entrance. Before I can push him further, he moves my leg back down to the mattress, pulling himself back. His lips return to mine, kissing me softly again as his hand gently brushes my hair back. "Em," I groan in frustration.

He gives me a strained grin, "You sure are impatient." Taking a deep breath, he slowly lowers himself down to me again. Not wanting to lose this contact, I wrap my legs around his hips. He groans, speaking my name in a warning tone; knowing he's trying to stay calm, I don't press further.

His hands tangle in my hair as he kisses me gently, slowly. Closing my eyes, I can feel my heart racing as I realize this is it. He looks deep into my eyes as he whispers, "I love you."

My fingers caress his back as I whisper, "I love you too. Embry; I will never get tired of hearing those words from your mouth."

He smiles softly at me, cupping my cheek as I feel his hips moving forward against my thighs, "My Lillah. My love. My life. My imprint. Mine, always."

My whole body shudders as I hear him say the words I thought I dreamed a few weeks ago. "I've always been yours, Embry." When he is once again positioned against me, I just barely lift my hips, biting back my moan when I feel the very tip of him sliding into me. Neither of us moves but I can see the tense look on his face as he tries to stay in control of himself.

He opens his eyes, slowly exhaling as he watches me. I want to look away, but I can't, his dark eyes hold my gaze as I hear him whisper again, "I love you."

My breathing is shallow as he slowly pushes a little more into me. While I know this is probably just barely his head, I can feel my body already stretching to accommodate him. I feel a tinge of pain, but the joy of finally making love with him is worth any discomfort.

He pulls back and I want to cry until he once again returns to me, pushing a little deeper. Biting my lip, I hold back my moan at both the pain and pleasure he's bringing me. Embry's lips press against mine as he speaks, "Don't ever hold back. I want to feel and hear everything."

My whole body shivers at the sound of his voice, deep and rough. Without meaning to, I tighten my walls around him, causing him to growl deeply, "Fuck!"

I open my mouth to apologize, but the only sound that comes out is a whimper as he pushes forward a little more instead of pulling back as I expected. Pausing again, he kisses wherever on my body he can reach as he gives me a moment. As much as I appreciate him giving me time to adjust, this slow torture is killing me; I know it can't be easy for him, either. Grabbing his face, I take matters into my own hands. I trace his lips with my tongue before pulling his face closer to me. As we kiss, I push my hips higher while tightening my legs around him. His hips jerk against mine in a natural reaction to my movements and he pushes into me completely, breaking through the last of my body's restraint. Tearing our lips apart I scream out his name as I finally feel him deep within me. My body is protesting, but I happily ignore it as I revel in this connection with him.

My hands move to his back, pulling him close to me so that I feel his heart pounding against mine. He doesn't move at first, giving me time to get use to this new sensation. He feels so damn good inside of me, though I try to relax I can't help the tightening of my body around him again. "Are you trying to kill me?" Embry groans against my ear. I'm worried for just a second before he continues, "Fuck you feel so good, baby," his voice comes in panting spurts. "Fucking perfect, better than I ever imagined. Please tell me you're ok."

His words push all the pain aside. All I can feel now is Embry, my forever, making love with me. "I'm more than ok," I speak softly, lifting my head to his shoulder, slowly sinking my teeth into his skin as I tentatively rotate my hips. I don't want him to stop; I don't want him to treat me like I might fall apart if he makes love to me the way he wants. I lift my hips up, pressing against him, inviting him to continue; telling him I'm ready for more.

"Shit!" Embry groans, as I feel him pull back then push forward into me again, this time with a little more force. The sting returns but all I can think about is how amazing he is making me feel. Removing my lips from his skin, I moan softly as I move to his lips. He begins slowly moving within me and I groan in his mouth, our lips moving against one another in the same rhythm of our bodies. Embry pulls back after placing a few kisses on my lips and his eyes meet mine. I stare up at him as he moves gently in and out of my body, the pressure inside of me building. Embry's eyes are so dark I can't make out his pupils any longer. The look on his face is so intense, so fucking sexy.

Each time Embry glides into me I feel every little ripple of his foreskin moving inside of me; I'm so happy he agreed with me about not using protection. I feel so blessed to be sharing these moments with him; embarking on a life with him, the man that I love. I force my serious thoughts away so I can focus on this moment with him. My hands tease his skin lightly, moving up and down his back, over the cheeks of his ass and back up, tugging his hair when I reach his head. Embry's eyes roll back a little when I play with his hair, his hips driving a little harder into me; his reaction makes the burn in my stomach increase so I tug again. He stares down at me, a low growl vibrating in his chest, making my whole body shiver. When he feels my reaction he smirks down at me then rotates his hips, oh so slowly then pulls out of me. Before I have the chance to protest he's pushing back into me, this time making sure that when he's fully embedded he grinds against my clit.

"Oh God," I moan, my eyes slamming shut and my back arching, pressing my breasts up into the thick air. Since my eyes are closed I don't realize he has moved until his mouth is on my nipple, pulling it between his lips and sucking deeply. His teeth graze over my distended skin and I couldn't stop the moan of his name that escapes if I tried. He pulls his mouth away from my breast and I whimper before realizing he's moving to the other, giving it it's fair share of attention too.

I move my legs down, rubbing my feet along the backs of his calves and he moans against my skin when it repositions our connection. "Embry," I pant his name, not bothering to hide my reaction, "please. I need you."

"I'm- here," he says to me between licks against my nipple.

"More, please," I beg him and he lifts his head to look at me. I almost pout at the loss of his mouth on my skin until he rotates his hips harder, pushing down into me until I cry out in pleasure. He lifts one of his hands, bracing himself only on one now and he glides it down my stomach, to the spot where we are joined. Embry's fingers descend to my clit and my mouth falls open, gasping for air while I squeeze my eyes shut. My hips keep up an erratic pattern, lifting and twisting against his, chasing the incredible burn that is taking over my body. I want him to make me cum so bad, to reach that amazing peak that only he can bring me to, but I also want this to last and last.

"Cum for me, baby. I want to feel you cum around me; your body pulling mine until I can't take it anymore," Embry drops his head to whisper in my ear and I shiver against him, my nipples pebbling against his chest, my clit throbbing against his fingertips.

My arms move around his neck, gripping his hair for dear life. He continues to whisper against my ear, his words bringing me closer. I can't contain my whimper when his hand moves from my clit, down my thigh. He surprises me by lifting my leg at the knee, pulling it back to his waist. His hand slides up and down my thigh as he withdraws and pushes into me faster than he has any other time. When he thrusts forward again I understand the shift in position, my whole body trembling as I feel every inch of him fill me. He anchors my leg around his waist as he repeats the pattern; withdrawing before pressing as far forward as possible. When his fingers again find my clit, I feel myself losing control; I'm shaking as I try to fight off the inevitable.

"I love you, Lillah." His words are the last thing I hear before my orgasm takes over. I know I'm screaming his name, over and over, but I'm so far gone, I can't hear it. It isn't until I hear him that I'm able to focus; just as he promised, my body's release brought about his. Even as I still feel my own body convulsing around him, I force my eyes open to watch him.

His body shakes just before he throws his head back, the most beautiful sounds escaping his mouth. He is handsome, beautiful; his neck exposed, the tendons under his skin tightened. His hips move erratically before I feel him trembling all over. The only thing keeping me grounded is holding on to his quaking body but when I feel him finally release within me, I can't contain _my_ body's reaction. I'm once again at the mercy of my own orgasm, completely amazed at the power he has over me. His hips jerk against mine erratically then he finally loses his battle, collapsing against me. The pressure of his body against mine finally starts to calm me down and I realize we are both gasping out the same three words over and over.

"I love you."

-0-

My eyes are heavy and I'm considering falling asleep when Embry kisses my forehead and whispers to me, "Thank you, baby, thank you for sharing this part of yourself with me." Tears prickle my eyelids but before I can say anything in response he asks, "How about a bath?"

"Mmmm," is the only response I can give. As appealing as sleep sounds, I'm already starting to feel sore all over my body. The idea of soaking in a hot bath sounds so wonderful. Tilting my head back slightly I give him a small smile, "Will you join me?"

"Of course. You rest while I run the water," he slides off the bed and I immediately miss him. Turning onto my side slowly, I cringe slightly at the pain I feel, but the sight of him walking naked into the bathroom helps me feel better.

He's only gone a short time before he returns, pushing the bed covering back and running a gentle hand over my skin before picking me up from the bed. Wrapping my arms around his neck, I glance back at the bed, gasping when I see the evidence of what just happened on the sheets. "Oh, Embry, put me down, I need to change the bed clothes."

"Shhh, you relax in the bath, I'll take care of cleaning everything up," he kisses the top of my head and I sink back into his arms.

"This is why I love you," I sigh as he gently places me in the bathtub. There are bubbles all around me from my favorite bubble bath. He even lit the candles instead of turning on the light.

Kissing me softly, he brushes my hair back before speaking, "You relax for a little bit, I'll join you after I clean up."

"Sheets are in the closet," I call after him.

He grins, looking over his shoulder, "Relax, baby."

My eyes drift closed and I can feel the pain starting to ease. Leaning back I recall the day, amazed at all that has happened. My fingers slide over my stomach and I feel a thousand butterflies taking flight as I consider the possibility that what just happened, our love, really could have made a baby. Shaking my head I chastise myself at the absurdity. _No way could I be pregnant. _

Clearing my mind, I'm just thinking about asking Embry to give me a massage once he joins me in the bath when I feel his warm hand holding my left hand. Turning my head slowly, I frown at him when I see he's standing beside the bath tub, "I thought you were joining me."

"I will, there's just something I want to do first. You agreed before but I want to ask officially." Suddenly, he's dropping down on one knee beside the bathtub. Splashing water I sit up straight, my heart fluttering in my chest as he pulls a small grey box from behind his back.

He's still holding my left hand, but my right hand claps over my mouth, my eyes wide as he speaks slowly. "Will you marry me, Lillah Hunter?" I can hear his voice shaking, which is my undoing, tears are again streaming down my face. He slowly opens the box and continues speaking, "Marry me and let me prove to you, every day, that I am worthy of the love you are giving me. Will you have me, Lillah? Will you spend the rest of your life with me?"

So many thoughts rush through my mind that I can't think to even respond to him. I know I shouldn't be surprised, I already agreed to marry him, but this is different; he's actually down on one knee proposing to me. His eyes are the only thing I can focus on, but as my mind catches up to what is going on I see he is getting more and more worried. When his eyes close for the briefest of seconds, I panic, "No, Embry."

His eyes get so big I think they might actually pop out. That's when I realize what I just said, "Oh God! That's not what I meant! I mean no, don't worry." Moving my hand from my mouth to his cheek, I do my best to clarify when he looks at me, "I love you! Yes! Of course I'll marry you. You think I'd take that back _now_? I want to spend my life with you. Only you."

"You know you just took ten years off my life saying 'No'. You can't scare me like that," as he speaks he leans forward, his lips soft against mine. "I love you, Lillah." I feel something cool slide onto my ring finger and my heart starts doing cartwheels as I realize he actually has a ring for me. _I'm wearing Embry's engagement ring._ "Do you want to see your ring?"

Sucking my bottom lip into my mouth I nod nervously. I don't know what to expect but I know no matter what it looks like, I will love it. As far as I'm concerned it could be one of those bread twisty tie things or his friendship ring placed on my finger. Embry lifts my left hand to his mouth, kissing the front of my hand and the ring that now sits on my finger. When he turns my hand around to kiss the back of my finger I can't control the tears as I realize just how well he knows me. Every single moment we are together he is focused on me, including that night we went out for the bachelor/bachelorette party. I only briefly saw the ring in the window, but I was sucked in; the rich color reminding me so much of Embry's skin, especially from the light of the bonfire.

"Em," I choke on the emotions, unable to say anything else.

He looks between my eyes and the ring, speaking every so softly, "If you don't like it, we can go pick out another one."

"You silly man! I love it! How did you even- I barely saw it myself- Are you sure?" My words tumble out of my mouth; I mean to ask him question after question, but my mind is so jumbled that I literally can't think straight.

Embry stands, still holding on to my left hand as he moves to step into the tub with me. I can't help but notice he's already getting hard again. I'm shocked, but not surprised; excitement starts to course through my body as I imagine making love in this bathtub. He sinks down, pulling me to rest between his legs. I can feel his fingers gently kneading my shoulders before he speaks against my ear, "Of course I'm sure. I didn't remember the ring until I decided I needed to propose sooner rather than later. I tried to imagine a diamond on you, but it didn't seem right. Then I saw this ring in my head and I knew it was perfect for you. I've been carrying it around since Tuesday. I almost gave it to you so many times before now."

"It's beautiful," I tell him, tears in my eyes as I hold my hand up in the air so I can see it sparkle. "I love you," I whisper for what feels like the millionth time tonight. Embry kisses the back of my neck and whispers his love for me before he chuckles lightly. "What?" I ask, not sure what he could possibly be laughing about.

"Claire is going to be so excited. I told her the night she stayed over that she could call you 'Aunt Lillah' as soon as she saw you wearing a sparkly ring." His words cause fresh tears to pop up and I am almost overwhelmed with the love that I feel for this man and my new family. I can't wait to be a part of it for the rest of my life.

-0-

**A/N:** OMG RIGHT? Are you swooning? Are you gushing? WE ARE. Next Tuesday will be EPOV and a continuation of their night together.

Thank you all for sticking with us through this. We promised you it would be here soon and are so happy to finally see them together. We hope you got everything you hoped for and more!

**Beta note: **FINALLY!


	36. Chapter 36 Next to Me

**Chapter 36**** "Next To Me"**

**Disclaimer:** Not SM. Anything else you need clarification on?

**A/N:** Oh hai. Erm, it's another long one (twss) but it was necessary to get through the scenes we wanted to "see" in Embry's POV. Enjoy!

_And the conversation stopped, and I looked down at the ring  
Your folks were next to you  
And you were right there next to me  
And I said_

_Girl, if you're wondering if I want you to (I want you to)  
I want you to (I want you to)  
I swear it's true (swear it's true)  
Without you my heart is blue_  
"If You're Wondering If I Want You To" - Weezer

**EPOV**

Lillah leans back against my chest, relaxing while I move my hands along her slick skin. My hand drifts down to her stomach, tracing gentle circles around her navel, hoping something is happening in there. I try to ignore the fact that my dick is pressed against her ass by picking up the bottle of shower gel she keeps on the side of the tub. She sits up a little when I place a sudsy washcloth on her spine, washing her back, shoulders and neck before moving to her arms. After I move to her torso I gently wash her stomach then move up to her breasts. I don't allow myself to stop there, moving down to lift one of her legs, washing it as far as I can reach then switching to the other.

Once both of them are complete I slide the cloth up her thigh to stop between her legs. I gently and lightly press the washcloth against her, cleaning her of our combined arousal and the blood from me taking her virginity.

The thought of that has me envisioning the spot on the sheets when I carried her from the bed. My heart fell and I wanted to kick my own ass when I saw what I'd done to her. Even knowing it was something natural and that it would happen I still hated myself in that moment. The only thing I knew to do was get rid of those sheets after I placed my sweet Lillah in the tub. I striped the bed quickly, even taking the sheets to the washing machine and putting them in before returning to put clean ones on the bed. Once the task was done, I quickly grabbed the ring box from my pants pocket and joined her in the bathroom.

She turns her face and kisses my cheek, pulling me out of my daze. "You are so sweet, Embry; I don't know what I ever did to deserve you," she whispers and I look down at her, my hand pausing with the wash cloth between her legs.

"Are you sore?" I ask, with concern.

She reaches down and pulls my hand up, taking the cloth from it then kisses my palm before turning to me. "I'm ok, Embry. Just a little tender but nothing I can't handle. The bath is helping though, thank you," she tells me as her lips hover against mine. I'm unable to resist pressing my lips to hers, kissing her slowly until it builds into something more. Before I realize what her intentions are, she repositions her body, turning to face me and straddling my thighs. She's far enough away that she's not touching my hard on, which she thankfully hasn't noticed.

Taking the cloth in her hand, she adds more shower gel on it before using it to soap up my upper body, her movements slow and gentle. As much as I want to watch her hands on my body, my eyes are glued to her face; her look of concentration and love is so amazing to see that I can't tear my gaze away from her. _She is so fucking amazing, she blows my mind_. _I'm trying to care of her and she in turn does the same for me. I've never had someone treat me like this before._ I'm so focused on watching her that I don't realize she's moved her hands down my stomach until she accidentally bumps the raging erection that is standing up from my hips. I hiss at the contact, as she jerks back in shock. Her eyes dart up to mine and I know I have a look of guilt on my face. _I could swear my cheeks are even blushing._

Without saying anything she leans forward, dropping the cloth before taking my face in her hands, capturing my lips with hers. I moan into her mouth as she slips her tongue between my lips, deepening the kiss. I'm so lost in her that I don't feel her moving until her soft skin is pressing against my cock; I nearly jump straight out of the tub when her pussy comes in contact with it. Her lips move to my neck and I am the one gasping for air this time. Her hips start moving against me and my hands grip her waist to stop her.

"Baby, if you keep that up I might lose my mind. I can't take you again tonight. It's too soon," I practically beg her to stop her torture.

She lifts her head to look at me, her eyes full of fiery lust when they lock with mine. "We can take it slow, Embry. I want you."

_If she's offering, I'm taking._

_You just took her fucking virginity. Let her body heal a little._

I wage a war with myself internally, not sure what I should and shouldn't do. She sits in my lap patiently, stroking her hand up and down my chest and placing kisses randomly. I move my hand from her hip to her thigh, then slowly around until I can reach between her legs. The tips of my finger gently move along her opening, gauging her reaction closely. When she winces a little I quickly pull my hand away, refusing to go any further. _I can't hurt her more._

She takes my hand and places it back between her thighs. "Lills, are you sure?" I half groan, half growl out my words.

"If it's too much I promise to tell you to stop, Embry, please." I look into her eyes and see how serious she is. _She knows me too well. _I don't want to deny her and I am definitely not lacking desire for her; plus, I'm selfish enough to try it if that's what she wants. Slowly, I nod my head and a bright smile covers her face. _You'd think I just told her she won the lottery._

Her lips descend on mine and we kiss for a while before she begins moving again. She moves against my length and after a few strokes I swear I might cum just from that light touch. Now that I know what it's like to be inside of her I'm afraid I won't be able to control myself- I'll be like a sixteen-year-old during his first time. Lillah reaches between us and takes me in her hand, holding my erection until the head is just inside of her. My eyes are locked on her face, making sure she's not uncomfortable as she slowly eases down onto me.

The feeling of her surrounding me again blows my mind, the tightness squeezing me, begging me to cum in her. I'm shocked and proud of myself that I manage not to blow it at this point. She pauses to allow herself to adjust and I watch her closely; she seems to be ok, only wincing a few times as I go deeper into her. Once she's sitting on me fully my head drops onto the back of the tub. Having her in this position is driving me out of my mind. Even though I know this is a mistake, that she'll only be more uncomfortable tomorrow, I can't help but be glad she wants me just as much as I want her.

When she begins moving on me I place my hands on her hips, helping her to find a rhythm that she enjoys. Her little sighs and whimpers turn me on more, making my dick harder as she moves up and down on me. _Fuck she feels so damn good._ I drop my face to kiss her neck, sucking her skin into my mouth and nibbling on it before pulling away. Her nipples press against my chest, hard and inviting, as I lean back so I can watch her move against me.

She may be the love of my life and my imprintee, but I _am_ a man; I'm finding it hard to tear my eyes away from her tits bouncing in front of me. They are the most beautiful pair of breasts I've ever seen in my life. I drop my face down to pull a nipple into my mouth as she arches her back against me, whimpering when I suck a little harder, allowing my teeth to scrape against it. Her hips jerk, getting out of the rhythm for a second until I help her to get back on track.

My hand moves toward the inside of her thigh, the other staying on her hip for guidance. "That's right, baby. Just do what feels good to you," I praise her as she moves against me. It's important to me that she be comfortable with her body, with mine, and what we do with one another. Once I speak her breathing picks up and she begins to move a little faster so I drop my hand to where we are joined. Finding her clit I press against it lightly with my thumb, hoping to help her along. I feel the pressure in my dick and balls building; I don't know how much longer I can hold on, but I'm not willing to allow myself release before Lillah, she is my main focus.

I help her move against me while I use my thumb to build her arousal. My mouth moves to her breasts again, determined to overload all of her senses until she cums on me. Just as I pull on her nipple a little harder and rub my thumb against her clit I feel her tighten around me and she begins panting my name. Popping my mouth off of her breast I look up at her, her eyes are heavy lidded and full of lust; it nearly pushes me over the edge.

"You feel so good, baby. Just a little bit f-," my words are cut off by her cumming, my brain no longer functioning. She's like a vice around me, her body pulling at me, begging me to release. _And who am I to say no to _that_?_ I place my other hand on her waist and hold her still, lifting my own hips up into her in several rapid successions before I finally cum in her. The waves of my orgasm roll up my spine and all I can think about is how much I hope between our love making in the bed and now, she's going to get pregnant in the near future. Now that I have her, there's nothing more I want than to see her body growing with my baby in it. _Come on boys, make me a daddy._

-0-

I run the back of my fingers down her breast to the nipple, watching in fascination as it pebbles beneath my touch. I see flashes of her under me, her breasts moving with the force of our bodies meeting; the two perfect tits bouncing as she rides me in the bathtub. The visions make my dick go hard again; I try to shift my hips so she doesn't feel it but I'm too late, her eyes popping open to meet mine. She looks surprised, her eyes wide and bright, as she looks at me. "Sorry, baby, I can't control myself when I'm around you. It's going to be more complicated now that I've had you."

My girl smiles at me shyly and it takes all of my strength not to pull her into my arms and make love to her again. My words to her are true, I will never be able to control myself now that I've had her. "I think I'm ok with that," she tells me, breaking the silence. "There will never be a day when I won't want you, Embry. Making love with you was more than I ever thought it would be. To feel you moving with me, in me, was... amazing."

Groaning at her words I pull her face to mine, kissing her softly then placing my forehead against hers. We remain silent for a few minutes before I finally lift my head to look at her. She looks like she's going to fall asleep but I'm selfish and don't want that to happen just yet. I want to spend a few more waking hours with her, even though it's getting late. I place a hand on her hip and move it up and down her side, loving the feeling of her silky skin beneath my palm. I still can't believe that she loves me, that she accepted my imprint and my ring. That thought makes a wide smile move across my face and she lifts a brow in question.

"You're going to be my wife," I whisper, kissing the tip of her nose.

"And you're going to be my husband," she replies with a bright smile, her grey eyes a little misty.

"Is your dad going to kill me for not asking his permission first?" I ask with concern.

"Daddy isn't that bad, Embry. He's just concerned about me, but once he meets you, he'll love you just as much as Mom does," she tells me with certainty. I hope she's right; the last thing I want is for her dad to hate me. He definitely can't find out that I deflowered his little girl. I shudder a little and she giggles, "I promise, it'll be ok."

I nod my head and kiss her still swollen lips. She shifts until her body is pressed against mine. She lifts a leg, placing it over mine and my fingertips gently dig into the skin of her thigh. "We shouldn't, baby, you'll already be sore as it is." I kiss her lips again then move to her eyelids and nose. Lillah sighs and nods her head in agreement but she doesn't move. I would rather die than to ask her to give me space but my dick is like a heat seeking missile. I shift my hips without thinking and my head presses barely into her before I'm able to jerk back. She whimpers but I'm not sure what it means until she opens her eyes to look at me again; there is the heat of desire, but also the residual pain from our activities so far.

Her arms wrap around me as she lowers her leg, breaking our dangerous contact. I pull her body against mine, even though it makes my cock ache harder. I plan to hold her like this for the rest of the night. Placing kisses all over her beautiful face I take the opportunity to recall the last few hours as she slowly drifts to sleep. My world is now as I have always wanted, but never dreamed it could be.

"Thank you, Lillah, for sharing so much with me."

-0-

"Daddy!" I know I'm dreaming when I see the little girl running toward me, but I don't care; I'm excited to have this dream. It's the same fair skinned little girl with dark auburn hair that I dreamed about before and I know, without a doubt, this is my daughter.

Picking my little girl up as she reaches me, I swing her around, making her giggle; she sounds so much like her mother that it makes my heart swell. When I finally tuck her up against my chest I drop happy kisses all over her tiny face, "My baby girl! Where's your Mommy?"

She points toward the kitchen and I carry her in there, unable to contain my grin when I see Lillah turn around from the stove. Instinctively I know this is how I am greeted every evening when I come home from work. It's the life I never thought I wanted but now crave.

Lillah is obviously pregnant, but not as far along as she was in my daydream. Her stomach is just slightly rounded under her t-shirt; she's incredibly beautiful and sexy with my baby in her belly. Pulling her into my arms, I kiss her gently, "How are my girls today?"

"We're fine. Emily, Claire, Eli and Wyatt came over today, they helped me get Halona all moved into 'the pretty room'. I can't believe Claire taught Halona to call it that," Lillah shakes her head, laughing at Claire's usual antics.

Halona starts squirming in my arms, so I set her down, handing her the sippy cup of milk Lillah has set out on the counter for her. She hugs my leg, "Fank ewe, Daddy. We play?"

Kneeling down to her level I kiss her cheek, "We'll play in just a little bit. Why don't you go get your baby dolls and I'll be right there, ok?"

"Ok." She kisses my cheek before skipping off to the living room. I can hear her digging her dolls out, suddenly very appreciative of my sensitive hearing.

As I stand back up, I kiss the small rounded top of Lillah's belly, "How's the little one today?"

"He's good," Lillah sighs, leaning back, "he's been doing somersaults all day. I asked Emily and she said both of the boys did that to her. I don't remember Halona being this active. It's wonderful being able to feel him so early on, I just wish he'd give me a little break so I could hold some food down."

"We got spoiled by Hallie," pulling her to me I gently massage her lower back, knowing that is one of the many places she is aching right now. When she sighs my name and moans a little, I know I've hit the right spots. "Have you tried out any of the names?"

Lillah giggles, "I think he likes Hunter; he jumped around for twenty minutes straight when I called him that."

"Hunter works for me," Lillah gasps, grabbing my hand from her back and placing it on her stomach. Immediately I feel our son jumping around; it's still tiny shifts, but he's definitely there.

Placing both hands on her belly, I hold her tight, enjoying the moment with my beautiful wife, "I love you."

"I love you too, Em."

-0-

The next morning I lie in bed watching Lillah sleep, smiling at the memory of my dream. She's so beautiful first thing in the morning; her hair disheveled and spread out over her pillow while sun streams in through the window. I slowly roll out of the bed, doing my best not to disturb her. When she stirs but seems to fall back asleep, I lean across the bed, kissing her bare stomach, whispering, "Hope you are in there Halona." I want to slap myself for acting so silly, but I can't help it; I'm excited there is even a small chance our baby could be growing inside of Lillah right now.

I move to the bathroom, filling a cup with water and grabbing aspirin. Placing the water and pills on her bedside table, I kiss her gently, brushing her hair out of her face as I try to wake her up, "Lills, there's medicine and water on the table. I'm going to make us some breakfast."

She moans sleepily, which I take as a she heard me, but doesn't want to move. Slipping on my boxers, I take one last glance at Lillah, smiling like an idiot when I see my ring flash in the sunlight.

Padding into the kitchen, I start the coffee then move around quietly so I don't wake her. I pull out pans to start breakfast, knowing she'll probably be hungry. My main focus is feeding my woman. _I sound like a caveman_. As I crack eggs into a bowl I know I'm being ridiculous, but all I care about is making sure she is taken care of; if that means feeding her, then that's what I'll do.

I'm flipping bacon when I hear a sound behind me; I turn to see her stepping through the doorway into the kitchen. Nearly dropping the spatula in my hand I stop myself before I run to her, wanting nothing more than to scoop her into my arms and take her back to bed. Her hair is still askew, a smile on her glowing face; but the thing that really catches my eye is what she's wearing. It's my tux shirt, partially buttoned and flashing her beautiful skin at me; it's sexier than if she'd walked in naked. The urge to beat my chest and mark her is strong but I try to push it down, feeling like a massive idiot for the thought. Unknowingly, she doesn't help the situation when she yawns, lifting her arms and the shirt to expose a _lot_ of her lush, creamy thighs.

Lillah shuffles over and I use my free arm to pull her body to me, leaning in for a kiss before speaking. She tastes like toothpaste, all fresh and minty, "Good morning, fiancé." Her cheeks pinken at my words but her soft voice repeats them. "How'd you sleep? Are you sore?"

She cuddles into my chest and I release the spatula, pushing the pan off the burner before I wrap both arms around her. "I slept better than I ever have in all my life." When I press her about how she's feeling, she lifts her face, propping her chin on my chest to look up at me, "I'm a little sore but I don't mind. It was worth it."

I run my hands up and down her back while dropping kisses all over her face. "You look so beautiful," I tell her and she smiles sleepily at me. Seeing her this happy makes me feel like I could take on, and conquer, the world. But first, we need food, "Are you hungry?"

"I'm starved, actually," she nods her head and covers a yawn with the back of her hand.

"I thought you might be. Let me put some bread in the toaster then we can eat." I lift her up, easily carrying her the short distance over to the table, placing her gently on a chair, keeping my eyes on her face to make sure I'm not hurting her. After she's deposited safely I grab a mug from the cabinet and pour her some coffee, sitting it in front of her before turning back to finish breakfast.

While I grab plates and put food on them, she is quiet, but for once, I'm not worried; this feels different now, it's a comfortable silence of just enjoying being together. When I turn around to carry her plate over I notice she's watching me, her chin propped on her fist and a soft smile on her face. My shirt is gaping open at the top and the swell of her breasts are peeking out; I try not to stare too long, jerking my eyes back up to her face. However, ignoring the way she's looking me up and down is not an easy task. Even harder is the fact that her curvy legs are peeking out of the bottom of the shirt and my body is starting to get, well, hard. I try to tame my thoughts because I don't want her thinking I'm getting any ideas, even though I'm pretty sure she's having the same ideas.

Once everything is placed on the table, I sit down before either of us speaks; she scoots her chair closer to mine and sits sideways, slipping her legs into my lap. Automatically my hand moves to rest on the top of her thigh, tickling along her soft skin as I take a bite of eggs.

"Do you have a wedding date in mind?" I ask between bites of food and Lillah looks at me over the brim of her coffee cup.

"November twenty-seventh," she says decidedly and I'm surprised at her quick response.

"Are you sure? I'm not complaining but I thought you'd want more time to plan?" I ask as she takes a big bite of toast. Seeing her eat something I prepared makes me happy. _Might as well go out and shoot something to bring home for dinner._

"I don't need time to plan; I know what I want and that's to be married to you," she grins at me, popping a bite of bacon in her mouth.

Trying to do some quick math in my mind to distract myself, I realize that is less than a month away. It's also in the middle of the week, "Ok, but why the twenty-seventh? Isn't that around Thanksgiving?"

"It is Thanksgiving, and I have a lot to be thankful for this year. Especially my wolf," she leans forward, kissing the edge of my mouth.

"That works for me," I tell her and lean forward to kiss her lips. "It's actually kind of perfect, November twenty-seventh will be two months since we met."

"It is perfect," she nods in agreement and I sit back, reaching for her left hand. I spin the ring round and round her finger, watching it shoot fire under the light as I hear her whisper, "Two months." When I look up at her, worried, she shakes her head, smiling, "Nothing bad, just surprising. I've barely known you a month but I feel like it has been a lifetime. Maybe it's the imprinting, but-."

She shakes her head, looking down, but she isn't fast enough, I see the single tear escape, "What, baby?"

"I'm just so happy!" She laughs but I can see more tears. Hearing her laughter eases my worry as I wait for her to explain further, "You're my best friend, Embry. It feels like I should be shocked that it has only been a little over a month. Here we are talking about getting married," she pauses, her hand brushing her stomach for just an moment before continuing, "and maybe starting a family. It's weird, but perfect."

"Speaking of starting a family," I change topics rapidly but I can't help myself. Now that everything is falling into place I want it _all_; no waiting around. "We should talk to Kim too; about you know, us being-"

Lillah's face lights up with a smile but she shakes her head, "I really don't think she would be able to tell me anything this soon, Embry, but I'll call her later to see when she can see me."

"Just tell me when," I tell her, looking into her eyes. "I want to be there with you every step of the way with our baby; even if we aren't pregnant right away." My words send a spark through my body as I picture Lillah pregnant again. I want this more than I ever thought I would want anything in all my life. The funny part is, I never expected to want _this_; to be engaged, planning a wedding in less than a month and talking about having a family. Lillah changed all of that for me.

She exhales softly, cupping my cheek as she says the most beautiful words, "I would love for you to be there, Embry."

We eat in silence for a few minutes, my mind still running in circles. When I finally look up I notice that Lillah is still watching me, her eyebrows raised in questions, like she knows there's more I want to say. _Damn she's good._ "I want to keep trying, even if it takes a while, but if you don't want to, I need to go pick up condoms after we finish eating. I'm planning on making love with you for the rest of the day; as long as that's ok with you."

Her eyes go wide and I can't contain my smirk when I notice her shiver. She nods her head, her tongue darting out to moisten her lips before she speaks, "I want to keep trying too."

A thrill runs through me at her words, excited at the prospect of really starting our family. Noticing she hasn't eaten much of her eggs and only that small bite of bacon, I point to her plate, "You should eat, you'll need the protein for energy. I want to see a clean plate before you leave this table."

"You're going to be a great daddy," she laughs at me and goes back to forking up eggs. I relax in my chair and use both of my hands, now that I'm finished eating, to massage her legs. I can't keep my eyes off of her, even when I notice her glance up at me every few seconds. I know she hates to be stared at but it's just not possible for me _not_ to look at her.

As she finishes eating, she looks up at me, her head tilted and eyes narrowed slightly. I suddenly feel like I'm in trouble again. "Daddy," she whispers softly, almost like a question, then her eyes go wide and she's pushing a finger in my chest, "You knew on Friday. You said you've been carrying my ring around since Tuesday, so you had it Friday morning."

Taking a deep breath I nod in agreement, "Yeah. I almost gave it to you then, along with the necklace."

"So while I was freaking out on the phone with my mom, scrambling trying to think what I could possibly tell my dad to explain our relationship, you had my ring in your pocket. You knew you were going to accept me as your imprint; why didn't you just tell me then?"

Looking sheepish I give her the truth, "Because, assuming you accepted my imprint, I planned on making love to you right away. If I had told you Friday, you would have missed school, there would have been no surprise party, no handing out candy, and we would have missed Paul and Rachel's wedding."

Having finished her food, she climbs into my lap, the shirt riding further up her thighs as she gets settled, "You think I would have allowed us to miss their wedding?"

"I think I would have made it very difficult for you to want to leave this house," I grin as I pull back the collar of the shirt, nuzzling her neck.

She sighs softly, leaning her head back to give me more access to her skin, "So we tell my parents we're engaged and getting married on the twenty-seventh?" I don't say anything, just nod as I move my lips slowly over her neck. I can feel her heartbeat increasing but she is still focused on our conversation, "When do you want to have dinner with them?"

Nipping at her ear, I mumble, "Not tonight, I want you all to myself."

"Ok," she whimpers out. When I release her skin she takes a deep breath, trying to focus, "One night this week?"

"Sure, baby, whenever." Frowning slightly I glance at her, "You sure your dad won't kill me for proposing before asking his permission?"

"I'm sure. As soon as he sees how happy I am, he won't say a word. Plus, Mom loves you, so she can help calm him down if he does get upset."

Nodding slowly I return to loving her body. Sliding my fingers slowly up her thighs I whisper, "I think I need to buy this shirt; you look too good in it to return it."

"I'd be ok with that. Maybe you can wear this at our wedding," she smiles, leaning her face down to my neck, her teeth grazing my skin.

"I'll wear whatever you want me to wear, as long as I get to call you my wife at the end of the day, I'll be happy."

Lillah leans back and again there are tears in her eyes. She takes a deep breath before speaking softly, "Husband, that's going to take a little getting used to."

"You've got a few weeks to practice," I grin before picking her up in my arms. "Right now, I'm getting my sexy fiancée out of this shirt and making love to her again."

As I carry her back to the bedroom, she wraps her arms around my neck. I can hear her happy laughter as she mutters against my ear, "I can't wait to make love with you in every room of the house. Oh, and I want to try the kitchen table too."

"Woman!" I roar, gently tossing her on the bed. Disposing of the boxers quickly, I climb in after her.

-0-

Lillah and I make love a few more times as Sunday wears on but, even though she doesn't say it, I can tell it's getting to be too much for her. After another bath, we curl up in the bed, Lillah grabbing the phone to call the girls, telling them to get ready for another wedding. I can hear the whoops and cheers over the phone, Lillah pulling it away from her ear. After a few minutes of being on the phone with Emily I hear Lillah gasp and she exclaims, "EMILY! I can't believe you did that!" I take her hand in mine but she gives me a half smile and waves me off, like it's nothing. I make a mental note to ask her about it again later.

Since I can only hear Lillah's side of the phone conversation it makes it even more confusing when she says "Ok, what else did she tell you?...Oh sure, we can do that. We'll all get together about it soon...Friday works." Still she won't tell me what Emily is sharing with her so I let it go for now. If Emily is sharing a secret with her I don't want to interfere. She finishes up her conversation then calls Kim to schedule a time to talk. Kim suggests after school the next day which both excites _and_ scares the hell out of me.

As she hangs up the phone we pop a movie into the DVD player. I pull the sleep shirt she's wearing off of her body, as she wraps her bare legs around mine, holding me tight while I place kisses on her skin every few minutes. Neither of us pays attention to the movie; I study her face as she runs her fingertips across my jaw. I lean forward, pressing my lips to hers, murmuring, "I love you," against her mouth. I don't think I'll ever get use to saying it out loud; now that I can, I want to repeat the words a million times.

I can tell she's getting sleepier by the minute so I try to help her relax, running my hands up and down her back. I love touching her lush body; her pale skin is such a contrast to mine. I pull her closer, twining our legs together, wanting to feel as much of her as I can. My hope is that as I sleep, I'll know that this is real and not another dream. I kiss her forehead, eyelids and the tip of her nose while her breathing deepens. After she's completely asleep I lay there watching her for what feels like hours. Even with our bodies knotted together, I'm afraid if I close my eyes it'll all be a dream.

-0-

Monday morning dawns not so bright but early; I wake up as the sun is rising only to find Lillah already awake. She looks alert, which surprises me after the late night we had. We're still in the same position as last night; we didn't move a bit. "Good morning," my voice is just above a whisper and sounds rough with sleep.

"Good morning, fiancé," she whispers and a huge grin spreads across my face. I reach for her left hand, needing to see the evidence of my ring on her finger. _It's still there. I'm really going to marry this amazing woman._

"Are you ok to go into work?" I ask, still worried that we went too far the past couple of days and nights. I knew her body would be unable to keep going at that pace but I couldn't keep my hands off of her. Plus, she's always so responsive, sexy, and needy; every time I touch her it's like I'm learning something new, like _I'm_ the one that has never done these things before. Seeing it all through her eyes, the wonder of every sensation drives me on; _I need more_.

She moves her legs a little, unwinding them from mine but not moving too far away as she stretches. She looks uncomfortable only for a second then her smile is back, "I'm a little sore, but not just there. I think you worked muscles I never knew existed." I can't help but laugh at that because although I'm sorry she's sore, she looks satisfied as well. I'm unable to stop my smirk, knowing I did that to my woman- no one else, just me.

A simple kiss progresses into moving down her neck, to her breasts, where I gently kiss her beard-burned skin then move down further. I stop at her stomach, feeling both possessive and whipped, as I place my lips on her skin. I lift my face and begin kissing lower but she stops me. "We don't have enough time to do what I'd like to." I sigh, knowing her words are right as I kiss my way back up her body.

Since we both have to be back at work this morning and are already awake we make breakfast together. We eat in companionable silence and as we finish up I glance at the clock, "You want to take a shower with me?" I ask with a sly grin on my face. She nibbles on her bottom lip and I can see she's trying to hide a smile but it doesn't last long. She begins to giggle when I scoop her up, tossing her over my shoulder and taking her back into the bedroom. I'd give anything to fuck her in that shower but I know we don't have time and I want her to feel one hundred percent tonight. My dick hates me right now, but he'll love me later.

We shower quickly as I find myself glancing at her frequently as she gets ready for work; it fascinates me to watch her fuss with her long wavy hair and put on make-up she doesn't need. She even 'allows' me to help her pick her outfit but she has final say on the selection: black wide leg pants and a red shirt. She's looks good enough to eat. _I have to get out of the house before I take her against a wall.  
_  
-0-

The guys give me a hard time as soon as I walk into the shop a short time later, but I let it roll right off my back. I've got my woman now and that's all that matters. I'm about to bounce off of the walls as the work day progresses and finally, Sam tells me to leave early because he says I'm driving him insane.

I'm leaning against Lillah's car when she gets out of school and she beams when she spots me across the parking lot. "You ready?" I ask as she approaches, placing her hand in my outstretched one.

"I am, are you?" I can see how excited she is through her dancing grey eyes.

"Sure, definitely. I'm just a little-," I shake my head, not sure what word it is I'm looking for. Lillah brings my hand up to her chest and places it over her heart. I can feel it pounding beneath her skin and I grin because mine is doing the same thing. "Yeah," I tell her, "that's it exactly." I open the passenger door to help her in before walking around to climb in myself. Once we are settled I pull her hand back into mine as we leave the high school parking lot.

"How was your day? Did anyone notice your ring?" I can't hide the fact that I'm excited for everyone to know we're getting married; that Lillah is taken and she's all mine.

"It was good. Are you kidding? I flashed this baby every chance I got," she giggles, holding our hands up, letting the little bit of sunlight hit it.

We drive directly over to clinic on the Rez to meet Kim. I'm nervous and excited- but mostly I'm hopeful. Surely if it worked for Jared and Sam, it'll be the same for me. Although, I do feel kind of stupid for thinking that anything might have stuck already... that Lillah could be pregnant this soon. _It's impossible, right_?

She calls my name, pulling me out of my thoughts and I glance over at her. "I've thought about that shower all day today. I think we need to give that a try," her words are meant to distract me, and they work; my cock is practically saluting her before the sentence dies in the air.

"I think we could give that a go," I smirk at her as we pull into the parking lot.

Lillah grins at me before saying, "I thought you might like that idea."

Taking a deep breath, I try to look relaxed as I speak, "Are you ready?"

"Let's do it," she grins and before I can get out of the car she has her seat belt unbuckled and is climbing out. We meet in front of the car and I wrap an arm around her waist as we walk into the clinic together. Kim is standing behind the reception desk when we walk in, waiting on us. She grins, bouncing over to Lillah and they jump around, hugging.

Kim ushers us back into a small room and we all three sit, Lillah on the examination table, Kim and I in chairs. Kim glances between the two of us, a knowing smile on her face, "So what's going on?"

I look nervously over at Lillah and she smiles softly at me before turning to Kim, "We're thinking about starting a family."

"'Thinking' like you are talking about it, or 'thinking' like you've already started trying?" Kim raises an eyebrow at Lillah and I can see her blush automatically. Kim giggles then turns to me, "Eager, huh?" I shrug, not caring what she thinks, just worrying about Lillah. Kim smiles at me, "Don't worry, I understand, I'm happy for you two."

Turning back to Lillah, Kim speaks in a slightly different tone; efficient, sure of herself, "Ok, time to be serious. Lillah, do you have a doctor nearby?"

"No. All of my doctor's are in Seattle, I saw all of them before I moved here, but I haven't found new doctor's here yet," Lillah explains softly.

"That's fine," Kim shakes her head. Glancing over at me briefly, she turns back to Lillah, "You are obviously welcome to use the services here at the clinic since you are engaged to a tribe member." Lillah nods slowly as Kim continues, "We have a wonderful OB-GYN on staff here, she's actually my doctor. I can get you an appointment with her, but it won't be right away."

Lillah glances over at me, and as much as I want to whine, I know we can't push further; we were lucky Kim was willing to meet with us today. She gives me a small nod before looking over at Kim, "I understand, that would be great, Kim. Thanks."

Kim's eyes meet mine but she has a reassuring look on her face, which surprises me, "No need to look so sad. I can still do a general health check today."

"Really?" Lillah's smile is as big as mine feels, "That would be great, Kim. I just- want to make sure I'm ok to carry a baby."

Kim stands, smiling at both of us, "I'm sure you are perfectly fine, but let's just double check." Kim grabs a clipboard from the counter then sits again, pulling a pen out of her lab coat pocket. "Ok, first, a few questions for you, Lillah. Let's start with your last period. Do you remember when that was?"

Lillah's cheeks turn bright red and she seems to actually grimace before she whispers, "Um. I think it was back in June, right after I moved here."

"That's over four months ago, Lillah. Is it normal for you to go that long between periods?" Kim doesn't look at me as she's speaking and I appreciate it; while this is not a conversation I want to be a part of, the fact that it's been so long for Lillah worries me.

"No, but things have been so hectic since I moved here that I haven't really thought about it. I was unpacking the house, then getting my classroom set-up and preparing lessons for the school year. Then with everything else," she waves her hand at me, "I just, didn't even realize it had been so long. Normally I'm very regular."

"Ok." Kim makes a few notes on her piece of paper then looks up, "So you've had a lot of stress lately. Anything else changed since June?"

"Well, once I moved here I started working out regularly, so I lost some weight. But that shouldn't matter, should it?" She glances over at me, a worried look on her face. Unable to sit by while she worries, I move to her, my arm wrapping around her shoulder, pulling her to my chest.

Kim is silent for a moment, watching us. Once Lillah looks back at Kim she speaks slowly, "Lillah, even a small change in our bodies can impact our periods; including weight changes and exercise. Tell me more about this. How much did you lose and over how long of a time period?"

"Twenty pounds or so between June and August." Lillah shrugs but I'm shocked by this number. I knew she had lost some weight, but considering how small she is, that is a lot more than I would have ever expected her to say. She turns slightly to look at me, frowning, "But I've gained seven of it back since September."

Kim is obviously surprised as well, "Lillah, that's fifteen percent of your body weight in three months; that is a drastic change. How did you lose weight that fast?"

"I started running once a day, plus reduced my calories to nine hundred or less a day. Some days I'd run twice," she suddenly looks very embarrassed, even more so than she did discussing her period.

"Lillah," I speak softly, but Kim jumps in before I can say anything more.

"Lillah, many times when we are losing weight, we aren't getting enough nutrients, so our bodies start storing them in other ways; one of those ways is to stop our menstrual cycles." Kim makes a few notes then looks back at Lillah, a soft smile on her face, "You mentioned you've started gaining weight again. Have your exercise levels changed as well?"

Lillah nods, giving me a look before speaking softly, "I'm lucky to get to run a couple of times a week now, and Embry won't let me skip a meal. Or miss dessert."

"I should have been watching how much you eat and exercise all along. I knew you were eating like a bird and exercising too much," I grumble.

Kim shakes her head at me, turning to Lillah, who is giving me a dirty look at my outburst, "Lillah, you are going to have to get use to that, I'm sorry to say. The moment I even mention 'diet' around Jared he flips. Especially now." Kim's hand rests on her stomach for just a second before she continues speaking, "It sounds like things are returning to a more balanced level for you."

"I guess, but should I be worried about gaining weight back?"

Kim shakes her head, again making notes on her chart, "I don't think so. As long as it is a slow increase, I think you should be fine."

I take Lillah's hand in mine, kissing the top of her head as I murmur, "No more diets. You are beautiful, no matter how much you weigh."

"Ok, next couple of questions might get a little uncomfortable, but I need you to be honest with me," Kim eyes Lillah, who blushes again, but nods. I can see Kim take a shallow breath before she fires off a few questions. The first few have to do with Lillah losing her virginity and if she had any unusual discomfort. Thankfully, Lillah says everything was fine. Of course, I know it hurt her, but Kim doesn't seem too worried about it. She also clarifies whether or not we've been using protection. When Lillah shakes her head in the negative, Kim just nods, mentioning the option of condoms and birth control if we don't want to risk pregnancy right away.

Lillah glances up at me nervously, and I immediately know what she is thinking. This is my chance to back out if I really don't want us to get pregnant. _How little she knows._

"You're sure it's ok if we keep trying, Kim? Even with Lillah not having her period in so long?" I cringe at the word "period", but I know it's a word I'm going to have to get accustomed to saying, now that Lillah is in my life.

Lillah sighs with relief at my words and Kim laughs, "I'm sure it's fine, Embry. Just be ready," she glances between the two of us, "it doesn't take but just a short time for us to get pregnant. Something about imprinting makes it almost abnormal how quickly it happens."

"I'm ready." Lillah says in the most confident voice I think I've ever heard her use. She smiles at me, squeezing my hand as she turns to Kim.

Kim asks a few more questions, taking notes intermittently. Once I think she's asked every question under the sun, she does a few checks on Lillah then finally gives us a clean bill of healthy as far as she is concerned, "I don't see any reason why you should have any difficulty conceiving or carrying full term once your body returns to 'normal' for you." Before she leaves she hugs each of us, "I can't wait to have another baby around. Our kids can grow up together."

Lillah looks at Kim with a hesitant smile on her face, "Are you sure you're ok if we're pregnant at the same time?"

"I'm totally ok with that! The more the merrier, we can torture Jared and Embry together. Plus, I'm guessing Rachel will be pregnant soon too. This is going to be fun," Kim wiggles her eyebrows at me and I can't help but to cringe internally at the idea of them ganging up on us.

"Kim," I speak softly before she walks out, "mind not mentioning this just yet?"

"Don't worry, I won't tell anyone you knocked Lillah up the first time you had sex. At least, not until I have confirmation," she winks before walking out.

I glance over at Lillah and she has her hands over her mouth, but I can tell she's laughing behind them. When she finally calms down, she grins at me, laughing, "You don't actually think you got me pregnant our first time, do you?"

Picking her up off the exam table, I gently set her on her feet, rubbing my lips across hers before speaking, "I sure as hell hope I did."

She rolls her eyes but returns my kiss, giggling when we pull apart finally, "It's a good thing I love you, Em. Otherwise, I might be upset if you got me pregnant right away."

"You're the one that didn't want to use protection," I gasp at her.

Her laugh is happy, which eases my tension, "I know, but you're the one with the crazy wolf sperm."

Choking on my laughter I take her hand, leading her out of the clinic and into the car before I respond, "Is that a complaint?"

"Nope, just an observation," she grins, taking my hand again when I climb into the car to drive us home.

-0-

"Are you sure I look ok? Maybe I should have worn a tie," I speak under my breath as I drive into Port Angeles the next afternoon. Lillah called her mom last night when we got home and agreed to dinner tonight with them, however, Lillah wanted to head out right after school so she could make a couple of stops before dinner. It worked for me; I wanted to go by the jewelry store to put in the order for our wedding bands.

"You look great, Embry, stop worrying. Daddy will love you, even without a tie. I'd rather you be comfortable," Lillah's hands are holding my right one over the center console. Despite her words, I can feel her hands shaking just slightly.

Parking the car near the restaurant, I turn to her, cupping her face with my left hand as I speak softly, "I don't care if he loves me, as long as he lets me marry you, that's all I care about."

"Daddy will let me marry you, don't worry," Lillah releases her pent up breath then explains, "I just hope he behaves himself."

"You aren't worried about me behaving?" I ask with a small laugh.

She kisses me slowly then grins, "I've never worried about you, Embry. You are an amazing man and I know you'll be fine. Plus, I'll be right beside you to make sure you stay calm and focused."

"As long as you are beside me, I'll always be calm and focused," I admit, pressing my lips to hers a little harder. As much as I know we both want to enjoy more time together, we have errands to run. Helping her out of the car, I direct her toward the jewelry store.

"Actually," she points at a store to our right, "do you mind if I run in here really quickly?" Shaking my head she releases my hand. When I move to follow her, she places her hand on my chest, "You can't come in here."

"Why not?" I ask, looking around at the store front; it looks like a dress shop, which confuses me further.

"Because I'm going to go buy my wedding dress and you can't see it!" Lillah laughs, shaking her head, "I want you to be surprised on our wedding day."

My eyes go wide with shock, "Lillah, we don't have time for you to try on dresses. We only have an hour before dinner."

"I already tried on the dress," she beams at me. I'm so shocked that I can't even choke out a response before she starts explaining, "I tried this dress on when we picked out our bridesmaid dresses for Rachel's wedding. Emily told me Sunday that instead of having the dress returned to the racks, she asked the sales clerk to set it aside for me. They've been holding it ever since." she shakes her head, smiling, "I don't know how she knew, but somehow, she did."

I'm so stunned by her words that I take a small step back from the door. Lillah drops a happy kiss on my cheek, "I'll meet you at the jewelry store in a few minutes. I love you."

"Love you," I'm barely able to mumble. I stumble down the street, considering Lillah's words. Emily didn't have confirmation that I imprinted until Saturday. _How did she know to set a wedding dress aside for Lillah? What made this dress so special that it needed to be set aside? Why was Lillah even trying on a wedding dress a few weeks ago?_

Forcing myself to move my feet forward, I take deep breaths to clear my mind. I'll have to ask her all these questions later, much later. I don't think her dad would appreciate knowing just how far along we both are in planning the wedding. I've already talked with Billy about the location of the wedding and officiating; he happily agreed to both. Lillah and I have discussed the reception and she keeps insisting on having it in the backyard; a traditional Thanksgiving dinner at our house as the reception. I'm fine with it, but I don't want her to be stressing out about cooking as well as the wedding. Of course, she rolls her eyes at me every time I mention this, explaining it will be potluck style; everyone brings a dish, we would just have to make the turkey, which she said I could deep fry out back, and we will order the wedding cake.

My hand against the door of the jewelry story pulls me out of my thoughts. I'm not as nervous as I was the last time I walked in here, but I still feel out of place. Thankfully, when the bell above the door rings, the sales girl from before pokes her head out, greeting me as if she recognizes me. When I explain that I'm here for wedding bands, she immediately pulls out a picture of the matching wedding band to Lillah's engagement ring.

The door opens and I don't need to turn around to know its Lillah. The sales girl smiles sweetly at Lillah, her grin getting bigger when Lillah places her left hand on my shoulder, obviously showing off her ring.

"So you are the lucky lady! Congratulations. Would you like to see the matching wedding band for your engagement ring?"

She turns the picture to Lillah, who gasps, moving forward to inspect the ring, "It's gorgeous!" Lillah looks over at me and frowns slightly, "Is there anything similar for him?"

"This designer does have men's wedding bands. Would you want a stone in your wedding ring?"

Lillah looks at me and I just barely wrinkle my nose, making her laugh hysterically, "No stones for him. I think just a basic ring will work." Lillah takes my right hand in hers, her fingers playing with the friendship ring, "Do you have anything that looks...braided?"

The sales girl grins and pulls out a catalog for Lillah to look through, pointing out a few rings for her to choose from. Once she's narrowed it down to two, she asks my opinion. The two look pretty similar to me, but when I reach my right hand out to inspect closer, I understand Lillah's request. Comparing the rings to my friendship ring, I point to one in particular, "That one."

Lillah nods in agreement, practically bouncing on her toes in excitement; we give the sales girl our information, and she takes my ring size, before she places the order. I can hear Lillah's gasp of surprise when she tells us the total but I happily pay for the rings without a word. As we walk out of the shop, Lillah whispers to me, "Do I want to know how you just paid for that?"

"How upset will you be if I tell you out of the money from Paul and Rachel?" I speak cautiously, hoping she understands.

Lillah exhales, "Not upset at all." Twisting her fingers in mine she leans her head against my shoulder as we walk to the restaurant, "Embry, have you ever considered the money isn't Paul and Rachel's, but your mom's? I mean, I know Paul and Rachel gave it to you, but this is what your mother left you. I think she'd love to know you are using that money for us to get married."

Considering her words I smile softly at her, "You think so?"

"I know so," she kisses my cheek before we cross the street.

As I open the door to the restaurant for her I tilt my head, "How did you pay for the dress?"

"Out of my savings," she grins, stopping to take my hand again when I walk in, "and don't you dare say a word. I wanted to buy that dress."

I decide not to argue but still grumble, "We need a joint account, so you don't have to deplete your savings."

"If we have a joint account, then I'm depleting _our_ savings," she winks after giving her name to the hostess.

"I guess, but I'd much rather you use the money from the house. I want to pay for your dream wedding."

"Wedding?" A gruff voice speaks behind us and when we turn around Lillah releases my hand, running to hug the man that has approached us.

Before I can say anything else, Lillah's mother is hugging me, "It's so good to see you again, Embry! Is it true? A wedding?"

"Good to see you too, Carolyn," I choke out.

However, I can't answer her question because Lillah has stepped back to me, pulling the other man with her, "Daddy, this is Embry Call. Embry, this is my dad, William Hunter. Daddy, be nice to Embry."

Nervously extending my hand I take a deep breath before speaking slowly, "Nice to meet you Mr. Hunter, Lillah has told me a lot about you."

"Must be nice. She hasn't told me a damn thing about you, then I walk in here and you two are talking about a wedding. What the hell is going on?" He isn't shouting as he speaks, but he is obviously upset. Mr. Hunter looks nothing like Lillah, but her Quileute heritage is evident in him; he's only a few inches shorter than me, but still well above six feet tall with salt and pepper hair, brown eyes that are blazing with anger right now and skin just a few shades lighter than my own.

Lillah opens her mouth to speak but her mother interrupts, "Now Will, I told you it was serious with Embry and Lillah."

She drops her voice, continuing too low for even me to hear. As she speaks, I pull Lillah to me; I can feel her heart pounding as fast as mine when she tucks her head under my chin. Stroking her hair I whisper, "I love you." The waiter interrupts, offering to escort us to our table. Taking a step back, I wave for Mr. Hunter and Carolyn to go ahead. Following them, I'm not surprised when the waiter stops at a table set off in a secluded corner - perfect for interrogating your daughter's fiancé.

When I approach the table, Mr. Hunter has two chairs pulled out, but as Carolyn moves to sit, she swats at Mr. Hunter's hand on the other chair. "Will, that's his job now," I hear her hiss. I'm just barely able to control my laughter as I take the chair and help Lillah into it before sitting myself. Lillah's hand reaches out for mine on the table and as we both look over the menu, she draws small circles on my hand with her fingers.

Once we've placed our orders, Mr. Hunter glares down at the friendship ring on Lillah's right hand before looking up at me, "I hope that piece of string isn't her engagement ring. My daughter deserves better than that."

"William!" Carolyn gasps just as Lillah shouts, "DADDY!"

Ignoring both of them, I look Mr. Hunter directly in the eye, "No sir, that is not her engagement ring. It's a friendship ring that matches mine." I lift my hand to show him the ring I still proudly wear.

"You admit you two are engaged then?" Mr. Hunter eyes me, but I refuse to give him the upper edge.

Before anything else can be said, the waiter appears to drop off our salads. While Mr. Hunter and Carolyn are distracted, I raise an eyebrow at Lillah, trying to let her know I'm going to let her take the lead on answering the question. This is her family, she knows how best to deliver the news.

Once the waiter walks away, Lillah lifts her left hand, holding it up to her parents. Her words are for them, but her eyes are locked on mine, "Embry proposed Saturday after our friend's wedding, this is the ring." Giving me a quick peck on the cheek she turns back to her parents.

Her mother is obviously happy about this news, "I'm assuming you accepted?"

Lillah shakes her head, excitement evident in her voice, "Of course! I'm getting married!" She squeals loudly before launching into her mother's arms, just as Carolyn gives out a similar squeal of excitement.

I don't bother trying to hide the smile covering my face as I watch Lillah and her mother bounce around our table. Mr. Hunter clears his throat, rather loudly, and we all turn to look at him. Lillah runs over to him, standing next to his chair nervously. He looks up at her, still not speaking as his eyes drop down to her hands. He reaches out and takes her left one in his palm, pulling it up to get a closer look at her ring. I watch his face as he inspects it closely; his eyebrows lift up in surprise and he cuts his eyes over to look at me. I realize I'm holding my breath when his eyes meet mine.

"It's a beautiful ring, Lillah. Isn't it beautiful, Will?" Carolyn chimes in, trying to ease the tension that is still flowing. "It's beautiful, Embry," she says and turns to me, "What stone is that in the center?"

I clear my throat a few times as Lillah's father releases her hand so she can take her seat again. "It's a fire opal in a white gold setting." I feel like I'm a salesman at a jewelry store.

Lillah slips her hand back into mine after she's settled in her chair, "There's an inscription too, in a tiny 'Secret Heart'." She shows off the ring, pointing out the small gold heart to her mother. She sighs happily, "I looked at it in a store window one time then Embry went back and bought it." She turns and looks at me, smiling lovingly. I can see the pride on her face and it makes my heart expand, knowing she's taking up for me even though it's not necessary.

"Sounds like an expensive ring. I remember Carolyn mentioning you're a mechanic; how did you manage to afford it?" Mr. Hunter grumbles.

"Will," Carolyn says in a warning tone.

"What?" Mr. Hunter turns to Carolyn, "I think we have a right to know how he's able to afford a ring like that on what he makes."

Opening my mouth, I start to speak before Lillah interrupts me, "Daddy! Embry makes more money as a mechanic than I do as a teacher. It's none of your business how he afforded the ring."

"Sir, I used the money from the sale of my mother's house to buy the ring. My mother passed away a few years ago and I sold our house to the friends that got married this weekend. As I was telling Lillah when you walked in earlier, I want her to use that money to have her dream wedding."

"Embry! You are not using that money for the wedding. We will of course pay for it, won't we, Will?" Carolyn narrows her eyes at Mr. Hunter. The look is very familiar to me, having been on the receiving end of it from Lillah, quite a lot recently.

Mr. Hunter looks shocked, "Absolutely not! I'm not paying for our daughter to marry a man I don't know."

I again start to speak but this time Lillah's hand moves to my thigh, squeezing it tightly. When I look down at her she shakes her head just slightly. I don't understand why she doesn't want me to say anything until I hear Carolyn speak, "William Hunter. That is the purpose of this dinner, so you can get to meet the man our daughter obviously loves. Stop acting like a spoiled brat. Embry is a very nice young man that only has our daughter's best interest at heart. We will be paying for this wedding. Besides, I thought you'd be happy, Embry is Quileute, like your grandmother."

"You are?" Mr. Hunter finally looks at me with something other than anger. His interest is peaked, "Do you know any Ateara's?"

"Yes, actually one of my good friends is Quil Ateara, and his grandfather is still alive," grinning at Lillah, I take her hand in mine under the table. "He was very excited when he learned Lillah was related to Ayiana, to have Ayiana's family back in our tribe."

"I knew a Quil Ateara, when my grandmother used to take me to the reservation, one of her cousins was Quil Ateara. Is that your friend?" Mr. Hunter is actually smiling now, surprisingly.

Lillah pipes up, "Daddy, that was probably Quil's father you knew. Did you ever meet Billy Black?"

"Name sounds familiar." Mr. Hunter shakes his head then turns to me again, "No more sir, if you're going to marry my daughter, you might as well call me William or Will."

Lillah and Carolyn have similar smiles on their faces at his words. Nodding my head I speak quietly, "Thank you, sir- I mean, William."

Now that most of the tension with her father has passed, the table goes quiet for a few minutes as we finally eat our salads. As Carolyn and Lillah finish, they start talking about planning the wedding. Carolyn mentions a few locations in Seattle, but Lillah quickly tells her our plan of getting married on the Reservation. Carolyn seems disappointed by this, but Lillah reminds her that most of her friends are in Forks and La Push. William starts asking me about other tribe members he knew and I answer as many of his questions as I can. While we are talking, Carolyn actually jumps in and mentions about my "responsibilities" to the tribe. This catches William's ear and he wants to know more. When I tell him I'm part of a group that protects the tribe, he tilts his head to the side. He sits there quietly for a moment then speaks softly, "You protect the tribe? My grandmother mentioned the tribe protectors when I was growing up. She had stories..."

He doesn't finish his sentence, letting his words fall off slowly. Lillah's hand on my thigh tightens, but I try to relax her, my hand running back and forth over hers. I don't want to give away anything and if she's nervous, I'm afraid her father will push further.

Carolyn's voice pulls William out of his thoughts, "You grandmother and her stories. Whales, ravens, wolves; every story started with some animal having human qualities."

"Billy Black told me those stories a few weeks ago; they are so beautiful. I just loved hearing about the tribe history," Lillah sighs as the waiter drops off our meals.

Lillah ordered chicken and she offers me a bite. Smiling at her after I taste it, I give her a quick peck on the cheek, "It's good, but I bet you could make it better."

She giggles as I offer her a small bite of my steak. Her eyes widen as she finishes chewing, "That has amazing spices, I'll need to know the combination."

"Ok, we'll ask when the waiter comes back." The table again goes quiet; no one really talking while we enjoy our food.

Lillah stops about half way through her meal and I raise my eyebrow at her in question. She shakes her head, "I'm getting full. If you insist on dessert, I need to leave room."

"I absolutely insist on dessert." Unable to resist, I lean down and kiss her cheek, whispering, "I love you."

Leaning back, she grins at me, her hand sliding slowly over my thigh as she speaks low enough for just me to hear, "I love you, too, now eat."

Once we are done eating, William and I both ask for boxes for Carolyn and Lillah. I also ask to see the dessert menu, which makes Lillah laugh. I can feel Carolyn and William's eyes on us as I let her pick out the dessert, but I do my best to ignore. Once Lillah decides on crème brulee, I offer the dessert menu to Carolyn and William, but they decline. I place the order for the dessert, along with coffee for Lillah and I. When I look back at the table, Carolyn is giving Lillah an odd look. Lillah looks at me then grins at her mom, "Embry learned a new trick from our friend Sam, he insists on dessert every night."

"Dessert isn't exactly on your diet, dear," Carolyn whispers. I don't mean to, but a snarl escapes my mouth and Carolyn looks up at me, surprised.

"Embry doesn't like diets." Lillah's hand is back moving across my thigh reassuringly, "I don't eat much of the dessert anyway, Embry usually finishes it off, but he insists we have dessert."

"I agree with Embry, I hate diets. I don't know why you women are always worrying about five pounds here or there," William interjects before Carolyn can say anything.

Carolyn looks at William, obviously shocked, "Will, really?"

"Really, you look great Carolyn. So do you, Lillah. You both look healthy and beautiful."

"I completely agree, William. Carolyn, you look amazing, and obviously, I'm partial to how Lillah looks," I wink at her, smiling when I see color moving up her neck.

The dessert arrives and I end up sharing it with everyone at the table, each person taking a small bite. William grins at me, "I like this dessert plan, Embry. I think I need to try it on Carolyn from now on."

Sipping their coffee, Lillah and Carolyn drop back into wedding plan talk. The one question I was dreading finally comes up, when Carolyn turns to Lillah, "So any thoughts on dates?"

"November twenty-seventh," Lillah says, grasping my hand under the table.

Carolyn nods, "That's a good idea, giving yourself a year to plan. I know you want something simple dear, but even simple takes time."

Lillah takes a deep breath, looking at me briefly before she turns back to her mom, "No, Mom, November twenty-seventh of this year. Three weeks from Thursday, on Thanksgiving."

Carolyn's lips move, but she doesn't say anything. Finally William looks between the two of us, his eyes now narrowed, "Why the rush you two?" Glaring at me directly, William growls, "Have you gotten my daughter pregnant?"

Carolyn finally finds her voice at these words, gasping, "Lillah, are you pregnant?"

"I'm not pregnant!" Lillah laughs, shaking her head. I want to clarify that she could be, but I figure it's best not to mention that right now. "The twenty-seventh was my idea, not Embry's." Turning to me, she continues speaking, "I love him so much, I just want to be his wife." Turning back to her mother she explains further, "I don't care about a fancy wedding, I just want to be married to the man I love. I want to start a life, and possibly a family, with him as soon as possible."

"You're sure you aren't pregnant?" William's eyes are locked on mine, like he knows I'm the asshole that deflowered his daughter. I cringe, but manage not to look away from his intense gaze.

Lillah finally breaks his stare, waving her hand in between us, "I'm sure, Daddy. I'm not going to give you details, but I promise I'm not pregnant."

They finally drop the pregnancy issue, but Carolyn is still shaking her head, mumbling, "Three weeks. How are we going to invite all of our friends and family in three weeks?"

"Mom, we want something small; just our closest friends and family. The only thing I care about is having everyone I love seeing me marry the man I love. I want you and Daddy, Angela and Ben, plus our friends from the tribe," I can tell Lillah is not comfortable saying this to her mother, but I'm so proud of her for standing up for what she wants.

William exhales, leaning down to speak softly to Carolyn, "Honey, Lillah doesn't want that. Let her plan the wedding she wants."

"I know, but still, what about…," Carolyn sighs, looking up at William. When he doesn't say anything, her shoulders drop, "Fine, I'll let Lillah plan the wedding, but do I at least get to help?"

"Of course, I want your help, Mom. I just want to make sure it's a simple wedding. That's who Embry and I are," I nod in agreement with her, so thankful to have this woman in my life. William turns to look at me again, inspecting me closely once more.

"Any particular reason you chose Thanksgiving?" he asks, surprising me with the look of interest he's giving us both.

"It's actually the 'anniversary' of our meeting. It seemed perfect and I don't really want to wait too far into winter. The beach will be cold at night," Lillah explains and I turn to look at her, nodding in agreement.

"I agree with her, all I need is for her to be my wife. Spending the rest of my life taking care of her, showing her she deserves all the love in the world; that's all I want. Whether or not it's a big wedding, that doesn't matter to me." I lift Lillah's hand and place a kiss on the back of it, on top of her friendship ring. "Plus, Thanksgiving is for close family and for giving, well, 'thanks' for the things we are blessed with. Lillah is the biggest blessing I've ever been given in my life. We want to celebrate that."

Carolyn sighs deeply and I turn to look at her. She's wearing a smile on her face and her eyes are misty. She reaches over, taking William's hand in hers and I glance in his direction. He's giving me a look of approval. "Embry, I'd be proud for you to marry my daughter," William's words shock and humble me. He reaches across the table, offering his hand to me. I automatically lean across and put my palm in his, shaking firmly. Sitting back in my chair, I relax as Lillah leans into my side, wrapping her arm around mine and resting her face on my shoulder. Kissing the top of her head I close my eyes, happy to know I now have two more family members.

-0-

**A/N:** Next Tuesday, Lillah's POV- dinner with Emily and Sam to discuss what else Lee told Emily and a little revisit from the man we all love to hate. Ooooh!

Also, our little story that could, along with our one shot "The First Imprint", have been nominated for Original Character awards in the categories of "Wish Fulfillment", "In Name Only" (The First Imprint), "Best Pairing", "Best Characterization", and "Most Impressive Writing". We are super excited and would love your vote, but also encourage you to check out the other stories that were nominated. There is some great writing amongst the nominated authors! http:/originalcharacterawards[dot]blogspot[dot]com/


	37. Chapter 37 Like You Never Had

**Chapter 37 "Like You Never Had"**

**Disclaimer: **Be honest, you kind of wish we were SM, right? I know, some days, we do too!

**A/N: **Lots going on in this chapter. More secrets revealed. Hope you enjoy!

_I wanna wear my hair up in a mess  
Cut off jeans, can you get with that?  
Give you something like you never had  
Cause I only want to be wanted by you  
I wanna tease you 'till you're begging me  
And you're on your knees and it's hard to breathe  
And every other time's just a memory  
Cause I only want to be wanted by you_

_Now I'm going crazy  
I'm tired of waiting  
My lips are on fire  
I just want you to know  
I'm losing my patience  
For the time that you've wasted_  
"Wanted" - Jessie James

**LPOV**

Daddy hugs me one more time, whispering softly, "You sure?"

"I'm sure, Daddy. I love him," I whisper back, starting to get emotional now that the time has come for me to part ways again with my parents.

When Daddy releases me, I take a small step back only to be wrapped up in Embry's waiting arms. Sinking against his chest, I sigh at the feeling of warmth and love surrounding me; not just from Embry but from my parents as well. I could not have asked for this night to go any better. Sure, there were rough patches, but I really feel like my parents like Embry, which is important since he's going to be around for a while.

Daddy walks up to Embry, clapping his hand on his shoulder, "Embry, I know you will, but I have to remind you again, take care of my little girl."

"I will, don't worry." Embry speaks softly, his hand moving gently up and down my side, sending sparks through my body even with the layers of clothing and my coat separating my skin from his.

Daddy moves to take Mom's hand, but she stops; moving back to Embry and I, she kisses me on the cheek, "Bye baby, we'll talk soon." I nod, knowing that even with my request of a simple wedding my mother will still go overboard; that's just who she is, and I love her for it. She steps over to Embry's other side, lifting up on her toes to kiss him on the cheek too, "I can't wait for you to be my son. Thank you for being exactly what my baby girl needed. You don't know how much it means to me to know you will always be there for her."

The tears spring to my eyes, blurring my vision, but I can just see Embry nod stiffly to my mom before she turns back to Daddy. I watch as they walk away, Mom turning back to wave at us when they reach their car. Embry squeezes me tight, his voice sounding much rougher than I'm accustomed to, "Come on, let's get you home."

He helps me into the car, but before he can close the door, I stop him. He looks confused until I turn in my seat to face him, pulling him to me. Once our lips are just barely touching I whisper, "I love you, _so_ much, thank you for putting up with my parents."

"It wasn't that bad," he grins against my lips before he pulls me tight against him, deepening the kiss. Our tongues tangle, both of us lost in this kiss of excitement over surviving the dinner and getting my parents approval. My fingers are starting to tangle in Embry's hair when I hear a horn honk. Embry turns quickly, putting his body between me and the honking car. When I peek over his shoulder I can see the window rolling down just before I hear my father's voice, "Get her home, Embry."

Embry nods and I watch as my father rolls up the window as they pull away. Embry's body sinks just a little before he turns back to me, twisting me around and buckling my seat belt without saying a word then closes the door. He slides into the driver's seat and cranks up the heat for me. As he pulls out of the parking lot I can just hear him say, "He's going to kill me for getting you pregnant."

"I'm not pregnant, Embry," I say as I lean forward to remove my jacket. He reaches for my sleeve, holding it up while I pull my arm out. After removing the jacket I turn to find his eyebrows raised as he glances between me and the road. "What? I'm _not_."

"What if you _are_? You heard Kim; it doesn't take very long for us to get pregnant. What happens if we get married in three weeks and we have a baby eight months later? Your dad will know we lied to him," he shakes his head, obviously upset over this idea.

Taking his hand I smile softly at him, "Em, you need to relax. Daddy likes you, but honestly, I don't care what he thinks. It's my life, and I want to spend it with you making our family. If that means our first baby shows up eight months after we get married, then so be it."

"What if your father comes after your husband in the hospital?" He gives me a small smile.

Shaking my head at him I start playing with his friendship ring, "That won't happen, Mom will be so excited to have a grandbaby that Daddy won't be able to say anything negative. Besides, I know you'll remain calm with him, just like you did tonight. You were great, by the way. I'm sorry they jumped to so many conclusions."

"I understand why they would; I can't imagine how your father felt. If it were my daughter," Embry stops speaking, but I can feel his hand shaking in mine.

Laughing softly at his reaction I run my fingers between his, "If it were _our_ daughter you'd be just as protective, but I'd be there to remind you of the conversation we are having right now and how much I love you."

He exhales, "I love you, too."

We are quiet as Embry drives through the black night. Recalling our last drive down this road, I grin, leaning over the console to whisper against his ear, "I think you deserve a reward when we get home."

He doesn't say anything right away, but I can hear him taking more shallow breaths, like he's trying to calm himself down. He finally turns to me, whispering, "Baby, don't say that to me, we have a while until we get home and after that kiss in the parking lot, I'm already dying to touch you."

"Then touch me," I speak softly, slowly sliding the hem of my dress up my thigh.

"Lillah," Embry growls in a warning tone while his eyes dart between the road and my legs. I know I'm pushing it, but my body is already buzzing with need. Leaning back from him I let my dress fall back down, resigning myself that we can't do anything while we are in the car.

Reaching for my BlackBerry, I send a quick text to my mom just to find out what Daddy is saying as they drive home. She tells me he really is happy for us, so that makes me feel better. To distract myself I begin to flip through my text messages and I see Embry's name. Opening up his messages I find the most recent one that came today during school. He has now taken to randomly sending me "I love you" messages throughout the day. It's so sweet and it makes my heart hammer every time I see these words appear on my phone. I happily reply in kind to each of his messages. Scrolling through I see my responses to him. However, when I see one text in particular I sent him a few weeks ago, I nearly drop the phone.

_I'm so wet. My panties are soaked. Do you want to feel?_ ~L

"Oh my God! When did I send this to you?" I show Embry the phone and he takes a quick look before laughing loudly.

"You don't remember? I thought you remembered everything about that night?"

Looking at the date on the message I realize it's from the night of the bachelor/bachelorette party. Shaking my head I laugh, "I don't remember sending _that_. Ok, no drinking will be involved in our party."

Embry clears his throat and I look over at him questioningly. He gives me a sympathetic grin before he speaks, "I was just thinking, we should probably stop drinking, just in case." His hand slides over to my stomach, his fingers gently brushing over the fabric of my dress. A chill runs up my spine as I realize what he means.

"Yeah," I say, suddenly aware I really could be pregnant. My heart pounds hard against my chest as I close my eyes, trying to imagine our baby growing inside of me. It seems so unreal, and yet absolutely wonderful and perfect.

We both fall back into silence, my mind moving rapidly through all the possibilities. Once we hit the Forks line I look up, surprised we are nearly home. Grinning, I turn in my seat to look at Embry, "So what kind of a reward do you want?"

"Being with you is reward enough." When I don't say anything, he looks up at me, shocked, "You were serious?"

"You betcha!" I grin, getting excited thinking of all the things we can do tonight, especially now that there are no restrictions on our physical relationship.

"You are going to be the death of me," he whispers as he pulls the car into the garage. I don't answer, I just grin, waiting for him to decide what his reward will be.

-0-

He fumbles with the key in the door knob while he has me pressed against it. My mouth is against his neck, kissing and sucking on his skin. "Lillah," he pants my name, lifting his head to look at me, "I need you to stop that if we're ever going to make it inside. Your mouth is killing me." The sound of his voice sends a wave of arousal between my legs; nodding my head I motion with my hand that he should continue unlocking the door and I'll let him do it without distracting him. He's finally able to wiggle the lock open, then we stumble through the door, his mouth attacking mine as he lifts me off my feet, carrying me inside.

My arms wrap around his neck and my face returns to the side of his neck, continuing where I left off. I tighten my legs around his waist, pulling him closer to me, my dress rising up over my thighs. He cups my ass in his hands and squeezes gently, pushing his hips into me. We both moan at the contact and he braces me against the edge of the counter. His hands move from my butt to my thighs and as I pull my mouth from his skin he presses his mouth to mine, licking his tongue across my bottom lip. His hot hands run down to my knees and back up the inside of my thighs. I expect him to keep moving, until he's touching the heat between my legs, but he doesn't and I whimper into his mouth.

When he lifts his head to look down at me, his eyes are dark and stormy, the intense lust in them sending a shiver skittering up my spine; taking my breath away. I place my hands on the side of his face, caressing his warm skin before pulling his face back to mine; I need to taste him again. My hands move into his hair as he begins to kiss me, deepening it quickly as my hands tug and wind tightly into his inky locks. Hips rocking into Embry's, I grip him tightly with my thighs and pull away just enough to moan his name. He nips at my bottom lip with his teeth, as I dive back into his kiss.

Work roughened hands move back up my thighs, beneath my dress to my hips, tugging at the fabric of my panties. He slides a finger beneath the leg of the fabric and trails along the bend of my leg until he is moving it along my opening. He moans and drops his face to my collar bone, flicking his tongue against my skin before pressing his mouth next to my ear and whispering, "You are so wet, baby. I fucking love how your body reacts to me."

Biting down on my bottom lip I stifle a moan and press myself against his finger, silently begging for more. He runs his knuckle over my clit, sending a wave of electricity through my body, ending in my toes. Digging my heels into his ass I try to pull him toward me but he won't budge. His hand leaves my body and grips my hip. "Embry, don't-" I begin to say in a shaky voice but he cuts me off, lifting me from the counter.

"I want you, right now, Lillah."

"Then take me, right here." I beg him, knowing how his brain works. He looks torn when he stares into my eyes.

There is a rumble vibrating his chest while he peers down at me. "Baby-"

"What? You can't," I pause and swallow around the words I'm trying to spit out. "You don't want to fuck me here on the counter?" The words are barely out of my mouth before he is pressing his lips to mine roughly. The kiss only lasts a second then he's pulling away and reaching for my panties, pushing them to the side. He struggles with them until I place my hands over his, lifting my hips to help him remove them. He tugs them over my butt and thighs, and then down over my boots; I'm surprised when he doesn't remove my boots, but intrigued, so I don't move to take them off either. He takes the slip of lace and looks down at it in his hand before glancing back up at me. Keeping my eyes trained on him I watch as he slips my underwear into his pants pocket.

I don't say anything; just move my legs to wrap around his hips, pulling him back to me; except, that's not what he wants. He pulls my legs away, letting them drop as he kneels down, taking my foot in his hand, "Fuck-me-boots. These things should be illegal, you drive me crazy as it is with fuck-me-heels, but fuck-me-boots are a new level of torture." His mouth moves to my knee, his tongue flicking out along the edge of the boots. A moan escapes my mouth without me thinking about it, his words driving me wild with need for him. I reach for his hair, tugging to get his attention but he shakes his head, grinning up at me, "Uh-uh, this is my reward, sweet Lillah. I'm going to make you cum on my tongue, here on the counter."

My stomach clenches and I can feel myself getting wetter at his words. His warm hands move to my legs, gripping the outside as his tongue zigzags across the skin of my inner thigh, slowly getting closer and closer to where I need him most. He stops halfway up my thigh, just where the hem of my dress has been pushed up to. I move my hands to pull my dress up further but he again shakes his head at me, growling, "_My_ reward."

He moves to my other thigh, starting at my knee again and using the same zigzag pattern to move up my thigh, driving me insane. When he reaches the edge of my dress again, his hands snake around to my ass, pulling me to the very edge of the counter. My hands automatically move to his hair for stability as my feet move to rest against his shoulders. This opens me up to him, which makes him growl deep in his chest as he pushes my dress up until it's bunched around my stomach.

His tongue returns to the spot on my thigh that he stopped at. As I watch, he sinks his teeth into my flesh and I'm unable to hold back the cry of pleasure. Screaming his name, I try to pull him to me by tugging on his hair; at the same time, my feet slip off his shoulders, the heel of my boots digging into his back as I try to pull him closer with my legs. He won't let either happen, laughing wickedly as he moves to my other thigh, "Not yet baby, I want to mark my imprint as mine." His teeth sink into my other thigh and my hips start moving on their own, looking for friction, any friction. Just as I feel I'm about to fall off the counter, Embry's hands grip my hips, holding me steady to prevent me from falling while he continues his assault on my body.

He starts moving his mouth, slowly up my thighs again; I can hear myself whimpering his name, but I can't stop. He runs his tongue up my skin, almost to the bend of my leg before moving back over to the other leg. He begins sucking and nipping, his face so close to my opening that his nose just barely grazes me. My thighs are shaking; I'm losing all control over my body having him so near. Unable to hold myself up, I lean my head back against the cabinet behind me and my legs fall open, allowing all of my muscles to relax on Embry's shoulders.

The sounds coming from his mouth drive me on, my hips still trying to lift off of the counter, seeking satisfaction, my body burning for him. My eyes slip closed while my mouth falls open, panting breaths in through my nose, out through my mouth; I'm surprised I can even concentrate enough to actually breathe. He has done many things to me in our short time together but this time seems more demanding, more intense. It feels like he isn't holding back as much as he normally does.

"Mmm, baby," I moan, my words catching on a gasp when he bites down hard, sending a wave through my body. Every muscle, from head to toe, clenches and my clit throbs with need. I don't know how long I can stand this. "Embry, I need, ungh... please baby, make me cum."

"Lillah," his voice sounds strained and urgent. I look down at him. His eyes are focused on my face, and they are full of fire as he stares at me. He dips his face before I can say or do anything, his mouth descending on my sex, his tongue licking from bottom to top. My body shivering hard makes Embry grins at me, never taking his eyes off of my face. "What is it you want baby?" His voice practically purrs. "Tell me what you want me to do."

"Your mouth on me," I pant out as best I can, shocked that he wants me to speak when I can barely draw breath.

"Where do you want my mouth, baby?" he asks innocently and I narrow my eyes at him.

I swallow thickly and my mind runs a million miles a minute, trying to come up with the words he wants me to say. "On my pussy, Embry. I want you to make me cum with your mouth," I blurt out and he growls at me.

"That's the kind of reward I was hoping for," he tells me gruffly as he turns to nip at my other thigh, sucking at it hard then releasing it and moving just slightly, turning his face to kiss my clit. His touch is light and loving but that doesn't last long. When he places his lips on me, his tongue slipping out and licking me softly, both of us moan loudly. One of his hands moves to join his mouth, two fingers sliding into me, filling me gently, making me wish it was his hard on pushing into me instead. His tongue flicks against my clit, working a pattern along with his fingers; my hips pick up speed, trying to move with him, reaching and seeking the orgasm I know is coming.

He presses his thumb against my clit, replacing his tongue as he begins to work me harder with his fingers, pulling and pushing in and out faster than before, matching the speed of my hips. My hands don't loosen their grip on his hair, my fingers threading and twisting through it, pulling him tighter against my body. He moans and the sound and vibration makes my toes curl. I open my mouth to beg him to put me out of my misery; as if he knows what I'm after, he presses the tips of his fingers inside of me, stroking the spot that makes the entire lower half of my body feel like it's going numb from pleasure. While he's doing that he nips my clit with his teeth and I just can't take any more.

When I open my eyes again he is looking up at me, lips wet with my cum; while staring at me he licks his tongue out, moving around his lips, cleaning my arousal off of his mouth. The action has a fresh wave of need rolling through me and before I realize what I'm doing I grip his hair, tugging and pulling his face back down between my legs. He doesn't deny me this and I watch in fascination as his mouth disappears again. His hands dig into the inside of my thighs, pushing me open as far as my legs will allow. His nose brushing against my clit and when my head drops back against the cabinet again, it lands with a thud, making him chuckle between my thighs.

My body begins to shake, my thighs tightening around him as the tension in my stomach expands and then just explodes all through me; up my spine, down my legs, to my toes. White hot bright light flashes behind my eyelids but I force them back open as my orgasm rocks my body; I need to watch him. He's pulled his fingers from my entrance and his tongue is lapping at me, his eyes still on my face. I watch, half dazed, as the flat of his tongue licks me as I cum in waves. I suck my top lip into my mouth, biting down on it while staring into his eyes. Flicking my gaze back to his mouth I notice his tongue is slowing then he turns his face, licking the inside of each of my thighs.

Finally he pushes himself up until we are eye level, a low rumble still coming from his chest as he looks at me closely, waiting for me to come back down. I grab his face in my hands and pull him close, not caring that I'll be tasting myself on his lips; I just need to kiss him. His lips crash into mine, his tongue slipping into my mouth before I even have the chance to really open up to him. His hands travel to my hips, gripping them firmly as he lifts me. My legs wrap around him instantly as he turns us from the counter, his mouth not leaving mine as he carries me to the bedroom.

Sucking his bottom lip into my mouth I slowly pull away to look at him. "I love your mouth," I whisper to him as my fingers play with the faint whiskers on his jaw.

He grins cockily at me and one of his hands somehow ends up between my legs, even though he's carrying me. "My mouth loves your pussy, baby. My mouth loves your whole body, actually." His voice is teasing, as are his hands, tickling my skin as he walks us through _our_ bedroom door. He tilts me so I can flip the bedside lamp on while he pushes the door closed with his foot. Once we are closed up together he gently places me on the bed. It amazes me that one second Embry can be fiery and intense then the next, he's gentle and slow; he is definitely a man of many sides.

We are both undressed before I even realize either of us has moved toward the other. We are both on our knees, facing one another when he takes my face between his hands, kissing me fervently. He rolls back on his heels, then sits down and pulls me into his lap. My legs part, straddling him, his hard body pressed against me while we kiss slowly, sweetly. As soon as I feel him against me, my body reacts immediately; my nipples puckering, sex wet. He runs his hands down my back, following the slope of it above my ass then down further until he cups it in his hands. His hands squeeze and pull me toward him, grinding me against him. I moan into his mouth, as he presses me against him again. His erection jumps against my abdomen as I whimper into his mouth.

I press harder against him, tightening my thighs as I pull his body against mine. I'm on the verge of begging him to flip me over and pound into me; my body aches for him, regardless of the orgasms he gave me in the kitchen. When my hips jerk against his hard cock, I use it to create friction against my clit. He breaks the seal of our lips and gasps while looking at me with heavy lidded eyes. The way he looks during these moments is indescribable; it sends shock waves through my entire body.

"I need you, Embry," my voice is raspy as I whisper to him, my lips hovering near his.

"You want me to make love to you, baby?" he asks, his own voice gruff and sexy.

"Mmm," I shutter against him, my eyes sliding closed. "I think I want you to fuck me," I whisper shyly and open my eyes to look at him. His mouth pops open like a fish, opening and closing several times. When I begin to move off of his lap, his hands jerk out to stop me, gripping my hips.

"Where do you think you're going? I don't think my reward is complete yet. I'd like to see you ride me, baby. You look so fucking sexy; your body above me, my cock sliding in and out of you." When I hear his words a flash of the two of us in the bathtub pops into my head and I bite down on my bottom lip, my body flushing with desire.

Leaning down I place my lips against his, the tips of my breasts brushing his chest lightly. I reposition myself until I'm kneeling next to him, planning to torture him a little with my mouth, but he has a different idea; he dips his face to kiss my stomach, then hip bone. Before I know what he is planning he flicks his tongue out, lightly licking between my legs.

My thighs begin to shake and I know I can't take much more of his teasing. Just when I think I'll have to tell him so, he lifts me up by my hips, bringing me over to straddle his lap again. I'm disappointed about not getting to have him in my mouth, but my need for him is so great right now, that disappointment fades fast. My parted legs curl around his thighs and he pulls me closer, just enough that the tip of his head is almost touching me. His hands roam up and down my thighs then ass, up to my back and into my hair before he pulls my face toward his.

Our lips blend together, slowly and lovingly until his mouth opens and he slips his tongue in to touch mine. Kissing Embry arouses me, even when it's the innocent kisses we share; if I could only do one thing for the rest of my life, it would be to kiss this man. Every time our lips meet I put all of my heart into it, hoping he can feel my love for him, believing that if words ever failed, I could use a kiss to show him how I feel.

My hips begin to move again, scooting forward; he moves a hand over my shoulder, down my breast to graze a nipple tenderly. His fingers pinch my nipple lightly, making my hips jerk, my body instantly covered with goose bumps while he keeps trailing a path down to my stomach. His palms spread across my stomach as it moves down, circling a finger tip around my belly button then reaching the top of my lips. He slips a finger along the top of me; I know he must be able to feel the wetness as he moves down further, cupping me in his hand.

"You are still so wet for me. Do you know how sexy that is, baby?" His voice is just above a whisper, as he moves his face until it's buried in the side of my neck. He kisses my skin then props his forehead against my shoulder. I turn my face just slightly so I can see what he's doing. His eyes are cast down at his hand on my body. He watches his fingers slide into me and with his ear being next to my mouth he can hear every single breath I take, groaning back at me when I moan his name. My own head drops down so I can watch his hands on my body. I notice his cock grows harder, the head popping through the foreskin that it had been peeking out of half way; I giggle to myself because it looks like he's reaching out, begging for some attention.

While Embry moves one finger in and out of me slowly I arch my back, my breasts shaking with the jerky movements of my hips. When he pulls out a finger and adds another to it, sliding it back into my body we both moan and shutter against one another. I tug at his hair on the back of his scalp and a playful growl comes from deep in his chest, making me giggle and do it again, just to hear the sound.

"Please, Embry," I whimper when he presses his fingers deep into me, massaging my inner walls with their tips. "I want to be with you when I cu-." My words are cut off by a moan when he again touches that spot deep inside of me. My hips jerk to a stop at the sensation it sends through my body. He gently eases his fingers out of my body and I whimper a complaint. Before I can say anything he uses his fingers to rub my arousal on his erection, which is now standing at full attention. I lean forward and press my lips to his roughly, kissing him with aggression.

After a few seconds of his warm lips on mine he pulls away to look at me. I smile brightly at him, anticipating what is going to happen next. I've thought about having Embry in me all day. It's like I can't get enough of him now that we've had sex. Our relationship has gone to an entirely different level.

I reposition myself, scooting closer to him, still putting most of my weight on my thighs, hovering above him. Before he can say or do anything I reach out, gently wrapping my fingers around his shaft, causing his hips to shoot up off the bed, as he growls my name. Noticing a drip of pre-cum on the head of his cock I rub the pad of my thumb across it, wicking it away lightly. "Another time," Embry gasps pleadingly as I start to scoot back, intending to take him into my mouth like I originally planned. His hands clutch at my upper arms, pulling me back up.

I release my hand around his cock but when my hand accidentally grazes the head again he gasps my name. I stop and sit up, looking down at Embry; I'm a little afraid but also very curious, studying him as I try to decide what to do next. "Just stand on your knees, sweet Lillah, I'll help you. I really just need to feel you right now." Embry's words come in pants and the sound arouses me more, knowing that I'm the reason he's reacting this way.

I move until I'm hovering over Embry's hard on and I can feel the heat radiating from his body, calling to me. He lifts his hips a little, allowing the head of his erection to touch my lips. The action is brief as he rests them back against the mattress. He uses his hands on my hips to pull me down until he's right at my entrance. Gently, he shifts one of my knees until I'm spread open a bit more, then he pulls me down further. Gripping his hand around the base of his shaft he guides himself between my lips; his eyes slam shut as I slide myself down onto him.

"Don't feel rushed. We have all night." He assures me in panting breaths. "I've been dying to have your wet pussy on me all day; to make love to you. Make you scream my name as you cum hard around me, as we cum together." His words don't really shock me but they send a shiver of need up my spine.

He lets me take my time and savor the sweet heat of our bodies joining again. I wince slightly once but then the uncomfortable feeling passes so quickly I wonder if I imagined it. The incredible way he feels inside of me overrides any unease or tension there might have been in my body. When I'm completely seated on him; he digs his finger tips into my hips. I don't move right away, allowing myself to enjoy the feeling of having him so deep; he doesn't say a word, just leans close and kisses the side of my neck.

I begin slowly moving my hips finding a rhythm with the help of his hands. His eyes stay glued on mine, an intense pull coming from him that I can't look away from. My back arches, curling and releasing with each rotation and forward movement I make. Placing my hands on his chest I brace myself while lifting my hips only slightly as I slide off of him then take him back in again.

Moving faster makes my breasts bounce between us, sometimes tickling against his hot skin. He lifts his head and moves to cup one in his hand, teasing my nipple with his fingers. Dropping my head back I whisper his name. "I love you. Love the way you make me feel, Embry."

Biting down gently on my nipple Embry helps to speed my hips up with the guidance of his hands. I can hear myself moaning and whimpering between shallow breaths, but I can also tell that his breathing has picked up too, both of us gasping at the pace of our bodies increase.

Embry's hand snakes down from my breast to the top of my lips. As soon as his fingers are on my clit my body starts shaking uncontrollably. I don't need to open my eyes to know he's damn proud of himself, which is a good thing because I'm not sure I _could_ open my eyes right now. His fingers continue to stroke me oh-so-gently with just the tips, not adding pressure but moving with such lightness that I'm almost not sure he's really touching me, except for how amazing he is making me feel.

"You feel so good, baby. Hot and wet against me. I love you more than you know." I hear his words just before I feel his lips on mine again; our kisses falling into the pattern of our joined bodies. He moves a hand to grip my ass lightly, pulling me down harder against him while he lifts his hips up to push into me. I can feel all of him inside of me and the intensity has both of us moaning the others name as I rock against him, grinding down on him and his hand.

When I don't think I can take the pressure building up any longer, he presses his thumb against me, rubbing hard and fast, bringing me near my breaking point. "Oh God, Embry. Feel so good like this. So different- so... g- good," I manage to stammer out through my labored breathing. I continue to speak to him, but my mind is so jumbled that my words now are random gasps of pleasure.

"I can't wait to feel you tighten around my cock, your body pulling me in as you cum around me. You have no idea how sexy that is, to watch you fall apart for me." I can no longer hold on to my body, his words sending me over the edge. My body is convulsing around him, and I just barely register that he pulls me down even harder on him as he lifts up into me again. The sound of him groaning, the feeling of him shuddering in my arms has me approaching yet another orgasm before I feel like I've even recovered from the first. My hips begin to jerk, picking up an erratic pattern just as I feel him again pressing against my clit. This time he also moves my hip so that we are at a slightly different angle; when he lifts into me, I feel him hit a new spot in me and I'm gone again.

One more rotation of his hips and I feel him joining me, both of us holding on to one another tight as we ride out our mutual pleasure. The feeling of him releasing in me is so amazing, but this time is even more powerful than ever before, if that's possible. When we are both finally able to focus again, he pulls me down to his chest, placing kisses all over my face while he runs his hands up and down my back, wicking away the sweat I can feel on my skin.

He whispers softly against my heart as he slowly withdraws from me, "You are so beautiful, baby." He leans down and kisses the swell of my breast, one of his favorite places on my body, and looks back up at me. He looks so happy and in love that I want to cry from the joy I feel seeing him react to _me_ like that. However, his next words make me love him even more. "If you could see yourself the way I see you," he says between panting breaths. Running a hand down my back he stops at the dip above my ass. "This part right here, so sexy, the perfect place to rest my hands."

He moves his hands to my hips and stops again, caressing my skin softly, "Hips, lush and curvy; perfect for my hands to grip, made to bear my babies." Down to my ass, "Round, a little wiggly when you walk." I want to be offended at his words, but when I gasp he just grins at me, "That's a good thing, baby. I love to look at your ass. Why do you think I like for you to run in front of me?" His words make me blush wildly, but I don't interrupt him.

On to my shoulders he moves, "Smooth and silky, delicate enough to nibble on." Then to my neck, "The place I love to leave my mark so everyone can see you are mine only." He lightly nips and sucks to prove his point. Finally he moves down to my breasts, cupping them in each hand, my nipples growing hard against his palms, "Succulent, soft and pillowy tits." I raise an eyebrow at him, but I can't help but laugh inside. _He is so a boob man, at least when it comes to me._

Before he can say anything else I slide my body up until my lips are close enough to cover his. I kiss him with urgency then I pull back to stare down at him, speaking seriously, "You are the most amazing man, Embry. You are beautiful, not only outside but inside as well. I'm so thankful I found you; thankful that Paul phased that day. I don't know where I would be now if it weren't for that."

"Don't even go there, Lillah. You never have to worry or wonder because I will be here, next to you, for the rest of our lives. I can't wait to share everything with you." His words are rough and choppy and I can feel the emotion behind them. I want to tell him I feel the same way, but the emotions clog my throat up. He rolls us over onto our sides then places his lips against mine while I wind our legs together, plastering our bodies so close that I don't know where he begins and I end.

-0-

The rest of the week flies by, between work and my mom calling, what feels like, every hour to discuss wedding plans. She threw a small fit when she found out I'd already bought the dress, but calmed down when I promised I would try it on next week. Mom, Angela and I are going to meet to find Angela's dress since I already asked her to be in the wedding party, and she happily agreed. She's excited to see my mom next week too, but she keeps asking who else is going to be in the wedding; I hope to be able to tell her soon.

We haven't decided who else we want to have standing up with us, only because of the dinner tonight. Of course, Embry doesn't know this is why I haven't made a decision, I haven't told him the significance of tonight. When Emily mentioned having dinner, she said there were a few other things Embry's mom had told her before she died. I'm unsure why Emily has kept this stuff a secret so long, but I'm sure there's a reason. I'm hopeful Lee told Emily about Embry's father, and subsequently, which of the pack members is his half-brother. I think it's worth waiting for this vital piece of information to decide who should be in the wedding party; if I had a half-brother or sister, I would definitely want them next to me.

Checking the clock when I walk into the bedroom, I know I have a couple of hours until Embry gets home from patrols. Quickly changing my clothes, I decide to run off some of my anxiety over the wedding plans. I'm about ten minutes into my run when I feel his eyes on me. Adding a little extra swing to my hips, I keep moving, but the growl I hear is distinctive and I know my wolf is watching me. _And enjoying the view._ If I had any lingering doubts, this past week has wiped them all out; Embry definitely is attracted to me. It doesn't matter if I'm perfectly made up or wearing his tux shirt the next morning with wild hair, he is always ready to make love and show me how much he desires me.

I hear a little whine from the woods when I run up the porch; before I close the door, I blow a kiss in the direction of the sound. As I walk through the house, I'm stripping my clothes off, looking forward to a hot shower after the run. I toss all the clothes in the basket before walking into the bathroom. While the shower is heating up, I turn around, catching a glimpse of my naked body in the mirror.

The woman staring back at me is a little shocking, only because I realize that for the first time, I don't see anything I hate on my body. All the things I used to worry about now look amazing to me and I know I have Embry to thank for that. My body is no different than it was when I first moved here, but when I look now all I see are all the parts that Embry loves. The breasts that distract him every time, the hips he grips tight just before he enters me, the ass that he pinches, squeezes, and smacks whenever he gets the chance, and the stomach he kisses softly when he thinks I'm sleeping.

My hand rests against my stomach and I push it out as far as I can, trying to imagine a baby growing. It's surreal to even consider, which is why I try not to think about it. Until I see an obvious change in my body or I start to have morning sickness, I don't think I'll believe it. Or maybe if Embry has one of those "moments" that Kim and Emily were telling me about, where they just "know" their imprint is pregnant. I shake my head, laughing at the absurdity of my thoughts, turning away from the mirror to get in the shower.

Once I'm showered, I quickly fix my hair, leaving it in wavy curls down my back just as Embry likes, and put on just a little bit of make-up; mascara, blush and lip gloss is perfect for tonight. My contacts have been bothering me the past couple of days, so I put on my glasses, deciding the evening will be relaxed enough not to need contacts.

He walks in just as I'm pulling a soft purple sweater over my head, pairing it with jeans and the fuck-me-boots he admired. I meet him just as he walks into the bedroom, picking me up and tossing me on the bed, growling just like I heard him earlier in his wolf form. He leans over my body on the bed, his lips attacking mine roughly. I want so much to enjoy this aggressive side of my man, but we promised to be at Sam and Emily's at six-thirty and it's already six.

He grumbles when I explain our time crunch, making me promise we pick this up again later. Once I agree, he runs to the shower; I finish getting ready then pull out jeans and a black shirt for him. He hasn't moved all of his stuff over here yet, but he brought over his clothes and necessities on Wednesday after he finished patrols.

He's ready and we are in his truck fifteen minutes later. I made a couple of fudge pies for dessert last night, one of which Embry and I cut into right away, the other I saved for tonight. I grab the pie once we pull up to Sam and Emily's house, following Embry out of the truck. Claire greets us at the door, "Uncle Bry! Aunt Lillah!" I nearly start crying when I hear her call me "Aunt Lillah". While Embry mentioned this change in name, it's very different to actually hear her call me this; it brings me such joy to have Claire include me in her family.

"Claire-bear," Embry picks her up, swinging her around the porch as I walk into the house. Eli is in his bouncy chair in the living room, sitting next to Sam. They both wave, Eli's hands flying wildly through the air, as I walk in. I make a quick stop to drop a kiss on the top of his head before making a bee-line for the kitchen. Emily pulls me into a tight hug as soon as I make it to the room.

"Hi! How's it going?" She giggles as I take a step back. I blush wildly and she laughs, "That good?"

"It's more than good; it's great, Emily. This time last week I was hoping I could somehow have a chance to keep him, and now I'm engaged, getting married in less than three weeks and," I stop myself before I can say more, knowing Embry doesn't want to share these details just yet. However, Emily knows me better.

"Are you thinking you're pregnant already?"

"NO! Absolutely not!" I try to keep a straight face, but I'm so excited I can't keep this from Emily. "But we're trying," I whisper softly.

Emily squeals with delight, hugging me close, "Oh my gosh! You two are going to be amazing parents. This is so exciting!"

"I'm not pregnant yet," I speak softly, not wanting to jinx us by having everyone assume it will happen quickly and then somehow my body failing. Now that Kim has pointed out how long it's been since I've had my period, I'm starting to worry it may not happen. She called yesterday to let me know she got me an appointment with the OB-GYN, but the earliest she had available was the eighth of December. I knew Kim was doing us a favor even getting us in that soon, but still, to wait another month before we can find out for sure if I can get pregnant and carry the baby without complications is killing me.

Emily shakes her head, "You will be, very soon. I have a feeling Embry will be telling you before you know it."

"We'll see." I speak evenly, but inside my stomach is flipping at the mention of Embry knowing I'm pregnant even before I know. Smiling at Emily I look around the kitchen, "Is there anything I can help with?"

"No, everything is covered, but you can show me that ring!" Emily giggles, then gasps audibly when I lift my left hand. She looks up at me, "How did he afford this? I know Sam doesn't pay him _that_ much."

Shaking my head I laugh softly, "He went a little overboard, but I love it; the color is just amazing. He used the money Paul and Rachel gave him for the house to buy it. I was trying to convince him earlier this week to stop thinking of it as Paul and Rachel's money and to consider it his mom's gift to him. I think he's still working through it, but he seemed more open to using the money, especially when I mentioned I think she would have liked knowing we are using her money for our wedding."

Emily grins at me, "You really are perfect for him, Lillah. I've tried telling him over and over that Lee wanted him to have the money. She didn't expect him to live in that house but that was the only thing of value she could leave him. Of course, he wouldn't listen to me; he's so stubborn, especially when it comes to money."

"Speaking of Lee..." I let my words drift off, almost afraid to ask the question on my mind.

Emily's hand slides over my cheek, smiling at me, "We'll discuss after dinner, let's eat then I'll put the kids to bed. If you don't mind, I think it'll be best to have Sam join us as well. I haven't told him anything, but just in case Embry gets upset."

"What is there for him to get upset about?" I ask, suddenly very worried for Embry.

"Nothing in particular," Emily says softly as she turns to pull a pan out of the oven, "but digging up the past is uncomfortable for him sometimes."

I nod in agreement, but don't say anything else when Sam, holding Eli, and Embry, with Claire's hand grasped in his, walk into the kitchen. The guys get the kids settled while Emily and I plate the food for everyone. Once we are all sitting around the table, everyone digs into Emily's shepherd's pie enthusiastically. After running this afternoon, I'm starving tonight, actually going for a small second helping before dessert is served. Embry, of course, is very happy to see me eating like this. I can't help shaking my head at how silly he gets over me eating, but I know it is because he loves me so much.

Once everyone finishes their desserts, Emily stands to take the kids upstairs to bed; Sam following her. She tells him to stay with us, but we wave them off, not wanting to impose. Emily tells us to get comfortable in the living room once goodnight kisses and hugs have been shared. Claire again makes tears spring to my eyes when she hugs me, "I love you, Aunt Lillah."

"Love you too, Claire," I whisper before Embry escorts me into the living room. We actually sit on the same love seat as we did a few weeks ago, which makes me smile. I rest my head against his shoulder, sighing softly, "We had our first date here."

"I was honestly shocked you agreed to attend the family dinner as my date. Then when the whole Leah thing happened- I thought I'd lost you." Embry shakes his head at the memory.

Remembering that night, I twist my head, "What was Leah up to when she hugged you?"

Embry grimaces before speaking softly, "That was the night everyone placed their bets on when I'd tell you everything. Leah had five dollars I would tell you that night. She was trying to make you jealous, make you get so angry at me that I would be forced to tell you everything or lose you. It nearly worked."

"What do you mean?" I lean back, shocked by his admission.

Embry shrugs as his fingers draw random patterns over my arms, "I admitted a lot to you that night, I was honestly surprised you didn't figure out I had imprinted on you. Of course, I knew why you didn't figure it out, Rachel told me you thought it was impossible that I could imprint on you."

I gasp, shocked to find out much he knew about what I was thinking then. "When did she tell you that?"

"The morning after you said it. While you were showering at her place she tore into me. She was trying to make me admit to her what happened; she doesn't like not knowing what is going on. She told me, hoping I would have a reaction. She wasn't happy when I managed to keep my mouth shut."

Before I can say more, Emily and Sam walk into the living room, smiling happily at the two of us. They take a seat, Emily curling up in Sam's lap just like I'm curled up in Embry's. I shake my head, realizing how right he was, all the clues were there all along, I just honestly didn't think it could be me, so I ignored all of them.

"We probably shouldn't keep you," Embry starts to speak but I stop him, moving my hand over his cheek.

My heart is pounding hard as I speak softly just for Embry, "Not yet, baby. Remember the letter your mom wrote?" He nods, but looks obviously confused. "There were other things she told Emily."

Embry looks around me suddenly, his eyes locked on Emily, "What else did my mom tell you? Did she say anything about my-." Embry stops himself, leaning back and taking deep breaths.

I know he is nervous but I do my best to calm him down, whispering to him how much I love him and that I'm here with him. Slowly his heart rate returns to a more normal speed. I check to make sure he's alright, and once he nods, I turn back to Emily, softly whispering, "Before you start, may I ask a question?"

Emily takes a deep breath then shakes her head, but I notice her hand is gripping Sam's like a life line. "Why did you wait until now?"

"That was one of Lee's requests." Emily's eyes are locked on Embry, who is now resting his chin on my shoulder to see Emily. "She asked me not to share this information until Embry was with someone. She felt it might be better for you to learn the truth with someone there to support you, unlike when she died."

I feel Embry shiver slightly behind me and I grip his hands, holding them tight. Turning my face slightly I whisper for him, "If you don't want to know, we can stop."

"No, keep going Emily."

Emily looks between us then back at Sam. I'm surprised when I hear Sam speak, "Embry, this will change a lot of things, not just for you. You need to be damn certain you want to know this information. We've all speculated over the years, but Emily knows the truth. She hasn't told me or anyone else. If you aren't sure, then we need to wait or let it go."

Embry takes a deep breath and I tilt my head back to watch him as he speaks, "I understand, Sam. I want to know, not just for me, but for Lillah and any kids we might have. If they have cousins, or aunts and uncles, they deserve to know. I do have one request though." He pauses, closing his eyes before he speaks softly, "If it's Billy, it goes no further than this room until I can talk to him. I don't want Jacob or Rachel to find out before I have a chance to talk to him."

I don't realize I'm crying until a drop hits my hand. I don't bother wiping the tears away, knowing more will fall before the night is over. The thought that Billy really could be Embry's father still feels wrong; I just don't see it happening.

I'm so focused on Embry that I don't see Emily and Sam move until Emily is sitting on the love seat next to us, Sam perching on the arm beside her. Emily grasps our joined hands, smiling, "You don't have to worry, Embry, it isn't Billy."

Embry and I both sigh in relief, thankful that Billy's reputation will remain intact. However, that relief is soon overtaken by the worry that Quil's father might be Embry's father. If that's the case, then Embry and I _are_ related somehow, since Quil is a distant cousin of mine. I'm starting to panic when I look up at Emily; she meets my eyes and shakes her head "no" once. Understanding what she means, I can't help gasping, looking at her, "Then- you mean- it's...?" Emily nods and I turn to Embry, so excited to know the truth.

Unfortunately, Embry looks completely confused, his eyes moving back and forth between Emily and I. "What? It's what?"

"I think they are saying we share a father," Sam says in his gruff voice.

"Seriously?" Embry's head jerks up to look at Sam. He still looks confused, almost like he doesn't want to believe it until he hears it directly from Emily.

"Seriously. Embry, your father was Sam's father, Joshua Uley. You and Sam are half brothers." Emily speaks softly, but her words hang heavy in the air of the living room. No one says anything for a few minutes as we give Embry and Sam a chance to digest this information.

Embry glances up at Sam, "Are you sure you didn't know?"

"Positive; I didn't even know she knew your mom until she gave you guys the letter." Sam tilts Emily's chin up, speaking softly, "You couldn't have told me?"

"I promised Lee, baby, I'm so sorry. Plus, I didn't want you to know then treat Embry differently." Emily sighs, "It was important to Lee that Embry have someone by his side for this."

"Did she tell you anything about how it- happened?" Embry asks, cringing at the words. I lean back against his chest, my hand caressing his cheek to help him remain calm through this.

"I'm guessing during one of the many times he left my mom," Sam growls then looks at Embry. "I'm kind of excited that we are brothers, man, but I don't want you to have any misconceptions about who our father was. He wasn't a great guy, trust me, your mom did you a favor by protecting you from him."

Emily looks sad when she speaks, keeping her eyes on Embry and me, "I wish I could disagree with Sam, but that is pretty much what Lee told me. Joshua had separated from his wife and came to the Makah village telling a story about how his wife had cheated on him. Lee's parents warned her not to believe him, but she was young and thought herself in love with him. She said he was very charming, making all these big plans to get married and start a family once he divorced his wife. When he found out she was pregnant, he left."

"Sounds about right," Sam growls and I can feel still more tears falling, realizing both Embry and Sam were hurt by this man.

Emily leans back, whispering to Sam before looking back at us, "Lee's parents weren't happy, but they weren't going to kick their pregnant daughter out on the street. They agreed to let her stay as long as she gave the baby up for adoption once it was born."

My hands fly to my mouth, but a small scream escapes before I can stop it. The idea of my Embry not being here scares me more than it should. This time it's Embry comforting me, "Shhh, baby, its ok. That didn't happen, I'm here."

Emily continues with her story once I give her a small nod to go on, "Lee knew she couldn't give up her baby, but she was also scared. So she agreed to her parent's terms, but once you were born, she refused to give you up. Knowing her parents would be furious, she packed up and came here to La Push. She didn't want to find Joshua, but she wanted Embry to be raised in the traditions of his father. She found a job, made friends and settled in to life as a single mom.

"Everything was fine until you 'changed', Embry. She wanted me to make sure I told you that she didn't blame you for that, but when you changed, she knew it had to do with your father. She hated grounding you, but she hoped that she could protect you from becoming like him, which is what she feared was going on. Especially once she found out you were hanging out with Sam."

"Did you ever correct her? Let her know we weren't acting like _him_?" Embry snarls out the last word, clearly just as unhappy with his father as Sam.

"I didn't know that was what she was thinking when we first met. I initially just went to talk to your mom because I knew she was grounding you. I told her I was a friend of yours and Sam's fiancée and that I knew you weren't getting into trouble. I didn't know when I mentioned I was Sam's fiancée, that's what got her attention. We talked for a long time, me explaining that you guys were protecting the tribe, not misbehaving. She asked me question after question which I answered the best I could without giving away our secret.

"She invited me to come over again a few days later. Our time together went from me answering her questions about Embry to the two of us just talking. She told me once I was her link to you, Embry, and that she hoped one day you would find someone to settle down with, like Sam had with me. I definitely think she would have approved of you, Lillah."

Embry gives a small snort of laughter behind me when I start blushing at Emily's words, "Told you Mom would have liked you." I don't say anything, just wrap my arms around Embry's neck, twisting in his lap to hug him tight. When I release him he gives me a soft kiss on the lips before returning his focus to Emily.

"So you and my mom became close, but when did she tell you about," Embry waves his hand between himself and Sam. I'm guessing he's still unable to say the word "brother", but he looks happy when he looks at Sam, which is a good sign.

"Not until the very end. Obviously, I knew she was really sick, so it surprised me when she called me over one day. That's when she showed me the locket and gave me the letter. It drained her to tell me what I just shared with you, but she wanted to make sure someone knew, someone she could trust. That's when she confessed that as soon as she knew I was Sam's fiancée, she knew it had to be me that she talked to, that the spirits had brought me to her. She knew I wouldn't betray her trust by letting it slip, because I knew the consequences, that this information would impact my family as well."

Emily squeezes Sam's hand and I can see tears running down her face, "I wanted to tell you, so badly." She turns to Embry, "Both of you. Especially when I saw how much you cared for Eli, but I couldn't, I couldn't break Nayeli's trust. I would ask the spirits for your imprintee to come to us soon so I could share this, but they wouldn't tell me anything, just that things were being set in motion. Even when Lillah joined us, Halona couldn't tell me anything until you actually claimed her. Do you know how frustrating it is to talk to vague spirits?"

"Halona?" Embry and I speak at the same time. When I turn to him, he looks shocked, his mouth hanging open slightly. I'm surprised, but I still need to understand what Emily is saying. Turning back to Emily I speak my words slowly, cautiously, "Emily, you speak to my grandmother?"

Emily looks confused, "Your grandmother? She was named Halona?"

Glancing over my shoulder at Embry I can see he's trying to follow this conversation, but is still confused. Giving Emily a soft smile I speak, "My dad's mom, and the daughter of my Quileute great-grandmother, was named Halona."

"Oh no, sweetie, this is Halona Catori. Your grandmother was probably named for her. Sorry, I forget I haven't given you the full imprint debrief yet, lots to catch you up on. Halona Catori was the Third Wife, she comes to me in my dreams and whenever I need her. She was the first imprint and so she comes to the first imprint in every generation to kind of lead us through this journey." Emily's face blossoms into a huge smile as she looks over at Embry, "She did mention your mom the other night; she said Nayeli was jumping for joy when you finally told Lillah."

Embry seems frozen at Emily's words; unsure what to do for him, I curl up against his chest, listening to his steady heartbeat. As shocked as I am by all of this information, I can't imagine how he is handling everything. Its wonderful news to know that he really does have a half-brother, but to know his mom kept this secret for so long must be hurting him. Trying to focus on the positive in all this I tilt my head to look up at him, dropping a kiss on his chin before I whisper, "You're an uncle."

Embry looks confused and I can't hold back my giggle. Thankfully, Emily helps me out, explaining, "Embry, since Sam is your brother, that means you are Eli's uncle; and my brother. Well, brother-in-law, but still."

I sit up straight, my smile wide as I turn to Emily, "That means we are going to be sisters!"

"I told you, you've been part of our family all along, Lillah. I already considered you my sister," Emily pulls me into a tight hug and I know we are both crying. When I lean back I see Sam giving Embry a weird look.

Turning to Embry I watch as he shrugs his shoulders, "I don't know man, women."

"Yeah, but they're our women, bro." When Sam smiles wide at Embry, Emily and I both start crying again, but this time there is laughter mixed in with our tears.

Once we both calm down, I twist around in Embry's lap to face him. He wipes away my tears gently before brushing his lips against mine for just a moment. When he leans back I speak as quietly as I can, just for him, "Em, about the wedding, I think it would be good to have- your brother and Emily stand up with us. Plus Angela, and maybe Jacob, since he's your Alpha?"

"Sounds perfect," Embry kisses me again before turning to Sam and Emily. "Lillah and I would like to have the two of you," he pauses, looking at me then back at Sam, "my brother and his wife, in our wedding. If you'd like, I mean."

Emily is bouncing on the love seat as she turns to Sam. He laughs then shakes his head, "We'd love to be in your wedding." Emily nods in agreement, winking at me. "Brothers," Sam says slowly, "that's going to take some getting used to, but I like it."

Embry agrees with Sam. "Should we let this get out like everything else or call a meeting?"

"The regular way is fine, I'm sure once Quil finds out it will take about two minutes before everyone else knows. He can't keep a secret to save his life."

We all laugh at the truth of this statement. The remainder of the evening is spent with all of us getting accustomed to this new relationship. It's so exciting to think that I've gone from an only child to marrying into a brother, sister-in-law and nephew, plus a pack full of family members. Embry truly has given me everything I've ever wished for and more.

-0-

Angela calls me up the next morning wanting to know if Embry and I would like to join her and Ben for lunch in Port Angeles. When I suggest it to Embry, he's all for it, especially since our rings are ready to be picked up.

We meet outside of the restaurant a few hours later, Angela and I giggling when we see each other. She hugs me tight then reaches for my left hand before grinning up at Embry, "I definitely approve!"

Embry snorts his laughter, "Glad to hear it."

Ben leads us in and we are quickly seated at a table. We place our orders before catching up on all that has happened lately. Angela tells us all about the new house and getting settled in. Having just gone through that myself, I empathize with her stress. Embry and I update her on the wedding party and the latest development of Embry's brother. She is shocked, but excited for us. Embry is still dealing with this information, but so far, he seems to be adjusting to the idea of Sam being his brother pretty well.

Once our food is dropped off, we all dig in eagerly. Since the table is so quiet, the angry voices in the restaurant are clearly heard by everyone at the table.

"I want to speak to your manager! This service was terrible. My soup was cold. Who serves cold soup?"

"It's gazpacho soup, miss. It's supposed to be served cold."

"Don't you dare speak to my fiancée that way. Don't you know who I am?"

When my head jerks up, I see Angela looking over her shoulder, like she recognizes someone. Just as I turn to Embry to mouth, "Carter," Angela turns back to me, shock and worry on her face.

"Lah, there's something I forgot to tell you. You know my friend Jessica?" When I nod in confusion, Angela cringes before continuing, "Remember how I mentioned she had a new boyfriend?"

My eyes go wide, "No! She isn't dating _him_?"

"Worse, sounds like they're engaged." Angela rolls her eyes, "I tried to tell her what a creep he is, but she just laughed, excited to be dating a 'Seattle Baldwin'."  
_  
Sounds like they are perfect for each other._ I almost chastise myself for even thinking that when I realize Jessica has spotted Angela and is dragging Carter over to our table. I want to run and hide but I know that isn't an option at this point. Turning to Embry, I try to plead with him to stay calm with my eyes, grabbing his hands and focusing on him alone as I hear Jessica using her best fake happy tone to introduce Angela to her fiancé, Carter. I'm hopeful they will ignore us, but no such luck.

"So are you going to introduce your friends to us, Angela?"

Angela takes a deep breath before mumbling, "Jess, you remember my cousin, Lillah."

"Oh my gosh! Lillah, I didn't even recognize you! Wow, you've lost a lot of weight since I last saw you. Bet you wish you could have lost some of those boobs, though! I hear you can have surgery to get them reduced." Just like all those years before, Jessica won't shut up and every word out of her mouth makes me feel about a foot tall. _I hate her. She really is perfect for Carter._

When Jessica takes a breath, Carter turns to me, a nasty smile on his face, "Lillah. Good to see you again. I see you are still slumming. How is it that you know my fiancée?"

-0-

**A/N:** Oh joy. Carter's back, and he brought his fiancée, Jessica. Raise your hand if you think the shit's going to hit the fan in the next chapter? Raise both hands if you want to see Embry take his ass down.

Also, if you don't have us on author alert (really, why wouldn't you? *wink*) we previously posted a one-shot for a challenge in which Emily dreams and has a talk with Halona Catori. When we wrote it we didn't even consider it could tie into LC. But while writing the last half of this story, we realized that Halona Catori had other plans for us. The one-shot is called "The First Imprint" if you want to check it out.

Finally, our little story that could, along with "The First Imprint", have been nominated for Original Character awards in the categories of "Wish Fulfillment", "In Name Only" (The First Imprint), "Best Pairing", "Best Characterization", and "Most Impressive Writing". Voting is open until 6:59pm EST TONIGHT, the 14th of December. We are super excited and would love your vote, but also encourage you to check out the other stories that were nominated. There is some great writing amongst the nominated authors! http:/originalcharacterawards[dot]blogspot[dot]com/


	38. Chapter 38 Time Falls Away

**Chapter 38 "Time Falls Away"**

**Disclaimer:** Some basic math for you. NKR + WH does not equal SM.

**A/N:** So, Carter is hated and everyone thinks our pairing Jessica with him was perfect. These two get worse, so get ready, but know, this will not be the last you see of him. MUHAHAHAHHA!

_Let it slide, let your troubles fall behind you  
Let it shine until you feel it all around you  
And I don't mind if it's me you need to turn to  
We'll get by, it's the heart that really matters in the end_

_Our lives are made in these small hours  
These little wonders, these twists and turns of fate  
Time falls away but these small hours  
These small hours still remain  
_"Little Wonders" - Rob Thomas

**EPOV**

Coward mixed with pompous ass has a very distinct scent and I can feel the hair on the back of my neck standing up. We are being shown to our table but I could smell him as soon as we walked in the restaurant. I reach for Lillah, smiling as innocently as I can, trying not to tip her off that he's here. I'm hopeful he won't recognize us and will leave without a scene.

We manage to make it to our table without being spotted. I motion for Lillah to sit down on the inside of the booth, mostly because I want to be ready to protect her from him if necessary. Angela and Lillah are talking about everything that has been going on, both with us and for Angela and Ben, but I'm not paying attention. I've spotted him and I can tell he and his- companion, are wrapping up their meal. I don't know who the blonde is with him, but she looks like the type of girl he would want; basically she looks nothing like Lillah.

Everyone is eating in silence at our table when the blonde starts going off on their waiter. I tilt my head down just in case they look over here as they turn to square off with the waiter. I'm taken aback when I see Angela's eyes go wide after she peeks over her shoulder at the couple. His voice is distinctive as he speaks and I'm not shocked when Lillah mouths, "Carter," to me. What is surprising is when Angela announces she knows the blonde, a friend of hers from high school named Jessica. The name sounds familiar, so I'm guessing Bella probably knew her as well.

I know the moment we've been spotted; Angela looks over her shoulder again just as Carter is helping Jessica into her coat. Angela sinks in her seat as Jessica gets a smug look on her face, grabbing Carter's hand and tugging him over to our table. Automatically I turn to sit sideways in the booth, facing Lillah in an attempt to hide her from Carter's view as they approach.

Her eyes on mine are soft, like she's trying to keep me calm. Her hands are clutched around mine as I hear Jessica speak in a haughty voice to Angela, bragging as she introduces Angela to her new fiancée, Carter. Unfortunately, she doesn't stop there, barely taking a breath before she is chastising Angela for not introducing her and Carter to her "friends".

I'm guessing Lillah has met Jessica before, based on Angela's introduction, but how Jessica responds makes me want to hurt her, her words vicious, cruel, and meant to cut Lillah deep.

"Oh my gosh! Lillah, I didn't even recognize you! Wow, you've lost a lot of weight since I last saw you. Bet you wish you could have lost some of those boobs, though! I hear you can have surgery to get them reduced."

_Surgery to _reduce _Lillah's boobs? This woman is crazy! Lillah has perfect tits!_ As much as I want to turn around and tell Jessica just how stupid she is, my eyes are still locked on Lillah's. I'm pretty proud of my girl when, even with Jessica's hateful words, she doesn't deflate like she would have just a few weeks ago. Instead, I can see her grinding her teeth; turning her nose up to snarl, her dislike for Jessica evident.

"Lillah. Good to see you again. I see you are still slumming. How is it that you know my fiancée?" Carter speaking makes me finally turn my head, looking over my shoulder to growl at the asshole.

"Wait, you know her?" Jessica gasps in understanding, "Oh! Is she the tub-o charity case you dated in high school?" Carter nods, making me feel the sudden need to punch him. They are lucky that Lillah has her hands locked with mine. Jessica tilts her head, analyzing me now, "Are you Bella's friend Jacob?"

"His name is Embry," Lillah snarls out, obviously infuriated at Jessica's tone.

Jessica gives me a pout before turning back to Carter, "Poor thing, her parents must be so disappointed in her. I mean, to go from you to dating one of those Rez kids." Shaking her head she whispers, loud enough for all of us to hear, "She really is slumming it. I'm just glad you came to your senses and dumped her, Carter. She doesn't deserve a guy as great as you."

"Oh my God. Are you _SERIOUS_?" Lillah's outburst surprises us all.

"Baby, shhhh. You need to calm down, they aren't worth it." I'm whispering in her ear, hoping to help her just like she helped me last time. However, I'm having a hard time remaining calm myself; I'm so angry at all the lies and accusations coming from these two; my hands are shaking and my heart is pounding rapidly against my chest.

"You're right. They aren't worth it." Lillah manages to speak softly, even though I know she wants to scream. Turning to Jessica and Carter, Lillah speaks evenly, "Just to be clear, I was 'slumming' when I dated Carter, he's half the man Embry is. Also, I'm the one who dumped Carter, when I found him sleeping with another woman.

"On that same point, your precious fiancée was on _my_ front porch a few weeks ago offering to 'take me back'. Believe me when I say, I did _not_ accept his offer, but it's good to see he's kept his two-timing ways up. I wouldn't trust him." Lillah advises and I chuckle under my breath. _Looks like my girl doesn't need me to come to her defense after all.  
_  
Jessica eyes Carter, but he just shrugs, shaking his head like Lillah is the crazy person. Turning back to Jessica, Lillah gives her a wicked smile, "One more thing, my parents, they love Embry. They hated Carter, for your information. They knew what a two-timing asshole he was, still is, apparently. My mom can't wait to call Embry her son. In two and a half weeks. When we get married." Pausing for effect, Lillah smiles softly at Jessica, "Has Carter let you set a date yet?"

Jessica doesn't say anything at first, she just glares at Lillah. "If you two are getting married, let's see the ring," she insists sarcastically. I can tell by the look on her face that her expectations are pretty low.

"Yeah, let us see the microscopic 'diamond'." Carter chimes in, his gaze locked with mine. I don't look away but I feel her pull her hand from mine and I see movement from the corner of my eye. Jessica's audible gasp pulls both mine and Carter's stare down to the table. I smirk when I see my ring winking up at us from Lillah's delicate hand. Unable to help myself I lean over and kiss her cheek then nuzzle my face into the side of her neck.

Lillah giggles happily before turning back to Jessica and Carter, "No microscope needed."

Carter, not being able to keep his opinion to himself lets us all know, "I should call the police, let them know I've found what I suspect is a stolen ring. No way he could afford something like that." I want to pull her hand back, tell him he doesn't even deserve to look at the ring.

"Embry didn't steal this ring, we just talked to the very nice lady at Fountain Jewelers that sold him this ring and our wedding bands." Lillah tilts her head, her eyes now focused on Jessica's left hand, "Funny though, isn't that a stolen ring on Jessica's finger?"

"It's a Harry Winston!" Jessica gasps.

"Right, a Harry Winston diamond that used to sit on Carter's mothers finger." Lillah speaks slowly to Jessica.

Jessica turns on Carter, "Where did you get this ring?"

Carter shrugs, "Mom didn't need it any longer, so she gave it to me for you."

Jessica turns, stomping out of the restaurant, not saying anything else to the rest of us. _Did she really think he'd gone out and bought a ring himself?  
_  
"You bitch," Carter hisses; before he can say anything else I'm standing up, one hand locked around his neck. Ben jumps up out of the booth, backing me up, no doubt, even though I don't need it.

"Stay the hell away from Lillah and me. If you ever see us out again, keep walking, because if you don't, I will finish you." My words are only for Carter. His eyes are wide with shock but I have a final warning for him, "Don't look at her, speak to her, or even think about her again. She is mine now, and I will kill any man that comes near her."

I release him, but he snips over his shoulder as he's walking out, "Touch me again Little Indian, and I'll press charges on you. I'm guessing her parents don't love you enough to bail you out of jail."

"Daddy will defend him tooth and nail and take your sorry ass down in the process. Leave us alone, Carter. You lost, go try and convince your fiancée you aren't a complete creep." Lillah is standing beside me, her hands on her hips and her chest heaving as she calls after him.

Once he is finally out the door, I pull her in my arms, "You should have let me kick his ass the last time."

"He may not be worth it, but I'm starting to think you're right. He doesn't like losing." Lillah sighs, her hands moving across my back soothingly.

"He'll have to get over it, because I am never letting you go." I kiss her neck then help her back to her seat. Once we are settled back in, I pull her tight against me.

Lillah apologizes to Angela and Ben, but they both tell us not to worry about it. Ben gives me a look of understanding as he takes his seat again, "I would have happily joined you in kicking his ass. I've never liked him, he looks down at my Angie all the time."

Angela shakes her head at Ben and I, but then turns to Lillah, a look of regret on her face, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you about Jessica. I had hoped it would pass before I needed to say anything, then with moving out I just forgot."

"Don't worry, its fine," Lillah reaches her hand out, patting Angela's that is resting on the table.

Angela still looks uncomfortable when she peeks over at Ben and me before turning back to Lillah, "I don't think it is fine. Now that Carter is engaged to Jessica, I have a feeling he's going to use that as an excuse for why he needs to visit Port Angeles and Forks, a lot. I think he wants to make you miserable. Much as I dislike violence, Embry, I really think he isn't going to go away until you kick his ass."

"I'll do whatever it takes to keep him away from us," I tell Angela simply before pulling Lillah's face to mine, kissing her forehead gently.

"I really don't think he'll be a bother, Embry. Even so, I certainly don't want you getting into trouble because of him. Like I said, he's not worth it. He was never worth it," she insists while looking up at me. I can tell she's worried so I decide to drop it, turning to talk to Ben about his truck.

The girls begin discussing wedding details while Ben and I make plans for him to bring his F150 by the shop for new brakes. Lillah cuddles into my side and I wrap my arm around her shoulders, relaxing into her soft body. We manage to finish our meal in peace and have a pleasant rest of the afternoon. As we all stand to leave the restaurant we make plans to go over to Angela and Ben's for dinner once they are settled into their place.

Lillah is happy, which in turn makes _me_ happy; I actually really like her cousin and Ben, and it's nice to feel like I'm just as much a part of her family as she's a part of my Reservation family.

-0-

Sunday morning comes way too early for my liking. As much as I would love to spend the morning in bed with Lillah, there is something else we need to do today. I brought over all my clothes this week, but I want to empty out the rest of my apartment. Sam and Jared are going to meet us there this afternoon to load everything up in our various vehicles, but Lillah and I are going over this morning to pack up everything else.

I don't have the heart to wake her just yet, enjoying watching her sleep just a little longer. She looks so peaceful, like a little girl when she sleeps. My fingers dance across her stomach of their own accord at the thought of a little girl.

My dreams have been filled with our auburn haired daughter every night, and the more I dream about her, the more certain I am that Lillah is pregnant. I haven't noticed a change in her yet, but I'm planning to ask Jared and Sam today for more details. I'm hoping very soon we will know for sure.

Letting my mind drift back to the dreams, I can't help smiling at the name of our little girl. _Halona._ Such a beautiful name, and fitting; I love the idea of naming our daughter after Lillah's beloved grandmother. In my mind, the decision is already made, but I have a feeling Lillah won't quite understand these dreams. I'm going to have to let her come around to the name when she is ready.

Too soon she is starting to stir and I know we have to get going. I don't have many possessions, but I want all of my things here, in our home. I have until the end of the month to clean everything out, but with the wedding in just over two weeks, there won't be time.

We dress quickly and are soon at my apartment, filling boxes with the few things I want to keep, along with setting aside any unwanted or duplicate items to go to charity. Anything else, including any food still in the kitchen, is being pitched. As we go room-by-room deciding what to pack, give to charity, or throw away, we joke and laugh with one another, enjoying the quiet apartment one last time. She reaches for a few puzzles I haven't yet worked on, but before I can tell her to go ahead and give them to charity, she places them in a box to go to our house. Twisting my head in question she grins at me, "I like puzzles too, but I think they are much more fun when you have someone to help you."

"You really are absolutely perfect for me," I kiss her softly before returning to my task.

"Didn't you say you and your mom used to do puzzles together?" Lillah asks as she pulls out the DVD's I own.

"Yep, it was something cheap for Mom and me to do. We used to talk for hours as we were working on those things." I sigh, remembering how much Mom loved those times. Looking back, she probably was using them as a way to talk, but I didn't care. "Why?"

"No reason, I've just been thinking- I just- I know I'm not pregnant-"

I cut her off right there, moving to pull her into my arms, "You don't know that."

"Embry, it's only been a week." Shaking her head, she smiles softly at me then rests her head against my chest as she continues, "I was just thinking, about when we have a family- it would be nice to do puzzles with our kids. We can talk for hours with them, just like you and your mom use to do."

"I love that idea," kissing the top of her head I can't help fantasizing about our family. "I can't wait to start our own family and traditions."

She sobers up a little and looks up at me with sad eyes, "We don't even know if I can get pregnant."

"Shhhh. There's no need to worry, baby. If it doesn't happen right away, it's ok, we'll work it out then. For now, let's just enjoy the possibility." My lips find hers, and I kiss her slowly until I feel the tension in her body ease.

When she looks up at me as we break our kiss I can see she is back to smiling happily, "In your 'possibility' world are we still having six kids?"

"Six kids? Damn dude, you going to keep her barefoot and pregnant the rest of her life?" Turning around I growl at the intruder. Even though I know who it is, I'm still irritated by his interruption.

"You're one to talk, you always told me you wanted a dozen kids with Kim," I wave Jared and Sam in, but I'm surprised to see Kim and Emily follow behind them.

Emily hugs us, smiling, "We figured you might not be done with all the packing just yet, so Kim and I are going to help Lillah wrap that up while the guys load up all the furniture and the boxes that are ready."

"You two are the best!" Lillah laughs as the three imprintees hug.

As much as I appreciate the help, I hate that our time alone has been cut short. I know we have our whole lives ahead of us, but I enjoy my time with Lillah so much that I never want it to end.

Sam elbowing me pulls me back from my brooding. "What goes where?"

"We are taking all the furniture back to the house, except the sofa and coffee table, those are up for grabs. If you guys want, take them, otherwise, they go to charity."

Emily grins up at Sam, "The couch might be nice for the lobby of the shop, I could make a slip cover for it and it would be good as new. We could probably use the coffee table too."

"Works for me, we'll put those in the Suburban and take them to the shop once we're done here." Sam gives me a small nod before we get to work, tearing down the furniture in the bedroom first, while Lillah, Emily, and Kim finish up in the living room.

We've just secured the mattress in my truck when I turn to Sam and Jared, "Mind if I ask you two something?"

"If you are wanting tips on how to satisfy Lillah, you came to the right person," Jared grins but I roll my eyes while Sam gives him a warning look.

"I'm good there, thanks. I wanted to know about when- how you figured out Emily and Kim were pregnant. What was it that changed about them that you knew?"

"What the hell did you do with the condoms I gave you?" Jared has a smirk on his face, but it vanishes quickly when I give him a shitty look; he shrugs when I don't respond. "I don't know about Sam, but it was like Kim had a weird perfume on; I could still smell her but there was something else added in. Not so much on top of it, like perfume, but blended with her scent. It's hard to explain."

"That's actually a pretty good explanation," Sam jumps in. He leans against the truck, crossing his arms over his chest as he seems to think for a moment, "It wasn't anything obvious, it was all subtle changes, but I know Emily so well that those changes jumped out at me, especially the scent. I think that's why only I would know, because I'm the only one that knows her body like that.

"Is it a specific scent?" I don't want to push too far, but I'm so anxious to know if Lillah could be pregnant that I want to make sure I don't miss any changes in her body.

Jared shakes his head, "Nothing I can put my finger on."

"It's the baby's unique scent. The reason it's 'blended' is because the baby is connected to her. Once Emily had Eli, I knew his scent right away too, because it had been tied to Emily the whole time," Sam grins at Jared and me.

"Seriously?" Jared has a silly look on his face, but I can't say anything.

"Yeah, it's pretty amazing." Sam looks back at me again, "You think she is?"

"I hope so," my smile is wide as I look between Sam and Jared. "She doesn't want to get her hopes up, which I understand, but hopefully we'll know one way or the other soon. It was just a few weeks after that you two noticed the difference, right?"

"Yep, now come on, all this baby talk makes me want to go spend time with Kim."

I glance at Sam but he doesn't say anything, following Jared back into the apartment. Once everything is loaded up, we decide to follow Sam to the shop to unload the sofa and coffee table before heading to the house. Once we get to the house, Jared, Sam and I unload my belongings. My furniture is going up in Angela's old room until we can decide what to do with it. Everything else is being put in the garage so I can go through it again this week and either put it away or pack it up in the attic until we need it.

We decide to take a break after unloading all the boxes into the garage. The three of us make our way into the house, but Sam stops as soon as we walk into the kitchen, lifting his nose slightly. "Eli is here," he says before walking into the living room. Sure enough, standing in the middle of the room is Quil, with Claire sitting on Lillah's lap and Eli bouncing on Kim's. Sam glares at Quil, "Did you bring them over?"

Emily stands, quickly pulling Sam into her arms as she speaks, "I asked him to bring the kids over, Lillah invited us to stay for dinner but I didn't want to burden Sue with watching them while we eat. I had him use the van so he would have the car seats."

Trying to break the tension I turn to Quil, "You drove the mini-van?" I can't help but smirk at the image that floats through my head; Quil behind the wheel of Emily's mommy mobile. Quil squints his eyes until they are slits and I grin bigger, unable to help myself. _It's just too fun messing with him sometimes.  
_  
"You bet I did; and I looked bad ass doing it too," he tells us and I feel Sam relax across the room as we all begin to laugh.

"Come on, Quil, you can help us carry in some furniture," Sam says, shaking his head as the four of us turn to go outside.

On the way out of the living room, I stop next to Lillah, running a hand over the top of Claire's head while I kiss my beautiful fiancée's lips. "Be right back," I whisper to her before standing and following the guys out.

During one of our trips upstairs Claire joins us, chattering to all of us as she leads the way down the hall. She makes Quil follow her to "the pretty room" and I follow shortly after, seeking them out when Sam, Jared, and I finish placing the dresser in the spare room. Quil glances at me over his shoulder, an eyebrow raised in question and I just shrug. "Lillah's grandmother had this room decorated for her when they moved away. It was Lillah's room in this house whenever she visited. When Lillah's parents had the house remodeled she didn't want to change it."

"Looks like you'll be ready..." Quil's words trail off and I shove him in the shoulder playfully as we walk back downstairs.

We make quick work of the rest of the furniture then decide to rearrange the boxes to make room for both of Lillah's cars. We work quietly for a while before the guys begin talking again.

When I look up Sam is turned to Jared, "Have you had any dreams about your kids?"

Jared shakes his head 'no', looking at Sam like he's lost it. Sam doesn't say anything so I pipe up, "I've had a couple of dreams lately. It's like I'm looking into the future or something."

"Yeah, same here. I knew exactly what Eli would look like and his name before I even knew Emily was pregnant," Sam seems lost in his thoughts for a moment before he shakes his head, turning to Jared. "Nothing?"

Jared shakes his head before Sam turns back to me, "Maybe it's just us? Emily would say the spirits know how stubborn I am so they send me dreams to prepare me."

"Could be, I'm sure Lillah would say the same thing about me. Is that how you knew though?" I don't know if this is a wolf thing or an Uley-family thing, but either way, it's good to know Sam dreamed about Eli before he knew Emily was pregnant. It makes me feel that these dreams are important.

"Maybe a little. Probably a combination of the dreams and her scent. It's like a movie playing though, right?" Sam asks glancing over at me as I drop a couple of boxes in the corner.

"Definitely, clear as day. If I didn't know better, I'd say it was real and not even a dream," I'm almost breathless talking about this. The fact that I'm not the only one that has these dreams is invigorating.

Jared hmph's, making Sam and I look over at him, "What? I can't get a dream about what my kid will look like? Whether it'll be a boy or girl? Dude, that's a rip off." While his words sound upset, his tone is light and teasing.

Quil snorts his laughter and the three of us growl at him, "What? It's kind of funny, you have to admit it!"

"Sorry, man." I ignore Quil and turn back to Jared, telling him with a shrug, "I don't make this shit happen. I'm telling you, if the dreams come true, I'm gonna be freaked the fuck out."

"Why's that?" Jared asks, his eyebrows drawn together in confusion.

"Because, the ones I've had-," I pause and shake my head, "I don't know. The first one happened when I was driving home right after I imprinted. I saw Lillah standing at the living room window of a house. A little girl was with her and Lillah was very evidently pregnant again." Explaining this to the guys is weird. I don't want them thinking I'm totally off my rocker but I want to talk to someone about it.

"Woah." Quil says, and it almost sounds like he's impressed. "You dreamed about your family right after you imprinted? I have to agree with Jared on this one; that's a rip off! I want dreams about Claire and I-"

"Stop right there!" Sam cuts Quil off before he can say anything else, "She is eight. I don't want you even thinking about a family with her until she's thirty." Sam doesn't wait for Quil to agree before he looks at me thoughtfully then waves his hand in the air, signaling for me to go on, "The first? So there's been more?"

"Uh, yeah, most recently I dreamed that I came home from work one afternoon and a little girl, the same one from before, came running to me. I carried her through the house and Lillah was in the kitchen, the kitchen in this house, cooking dinner. She was pregnant again, but she was just starting to show and she was convinced it was a boy." I take a breath, lost in thought before speaking again. "Anyway, the little girl, her name was Halona."

Sam looks stunned by my words and I nod, knowing he's recognizing the name we discussed during dinner with him and Emily. "That's some deep shit, dude."

"Yeah," I half laugh, "tell me about it." I turn to Jared and explain, "Lillah's grandmother, the one that grew up in this house, her name was Halona. I didn't know it when I dreamed about the little girl, I didn't find out until the other night." They all look surprised but before they can say anything, I go on, "According to Emily, that's also the name of The Third Wife."

Jared's mouth falls open and I nod, understanding why he'd be shocked. The guys and I drift off in our own little worlds again for a while. Quil's voice breaks the silence of boxes shuffling and grunting. "What the fuck? Why don't I get the good dreams?" Jared and I start laughing and can't stop, especially when we hear Sam growl at Quil. When we turn around, Quil looks annoyed but Sam looks pissed. We both turn back to finish cleaning up the garage, deciding to stay out of this one.

We are just finishing up when Kim joins us, yawning as she walks across the garage to Jared. He whispers to her briefly then picks her up in his arms, telling us goodnight as he puts her in the Bronco. We retreat to the kitchen, Lillah and Emily explaining that Kim was exhausted and that's why she and Jared rushed off. I offer to help Lillah with dinner but Emily shoves me out of the kitchen so she can take my place.

Sam and I are left to entertain the kids, including Quil, so we pop in a movie, Claire's choice. This time she picks one I actually recognize, _Beauty and the Beast_, which will now forever remind me of Quil in his Halloween costume. Sam and I start laughing and can't stop until we are near tears. Quil turns and gives us a dirty look and it makes us laugh even harder when Claire shushes us.

Lillah pokes her head around the doorway into the living room; since Claire shushed me, I just point at the television. Lillah starts giggling as she turns and goes back into the kitchen. A few seconds later I hear Emily cackle out. Sam and I look at one another, still laughing. Turning to Quil I whisper, "You know you're never going to live this shit down."

"Uncle Bry, we don't say that word!" Claire insists, her hands on her hips and I have to bite my tongue to hold in my laughter.

"Sorry, Claire," I tell her and she nods her little head, turning back to the TV.

Quil turns back to me, a smug grin on his face, "She told you."

Rolling my eyes I look over at Sam to find his shoulders are shaking with laughter. Eli is watching Sam closely, giggling and clapping along with him. "She already bosses all of us around, imagine when she grows up. She's gonna give Quil hell," I whisper so only Sam can hear. He grins proudly and nods his head just as Emily and Lillah call us in to dinner.

Dinner, as always, is a boisterous affair with lots of laughing and talking over one another. Even Eli joins in, speaking in his baby talk as loud as he can. After we eat I'm washing the dishes when Lillah approaches, "Where are the puzzles we packed up?"

"I think they are in a box on the front row in the garage. Why?"

"Because I think it would be nice to start doing puzzles with our family now." When I turn to look at her, my eyebrows lifted she brushes her lips against mine, "Our family, your brother Sam and his wife and son, and my cousin Quil and his imprint. Our family."

As weird as it is to think of Sam as my brother, I can't help but love Lillah for knowing exactly how to blend this crazy group and make everyone feel comfortable. The rest of the evening flies by, all of us enjoying ourselves as we work on the puzzle in the kitchen. When Claire falls asleep in Quil's arms and Eli's soft snores can be heard from his car seat, Sam and Emily decide it's time to pack up. We walk them outside, Lillah helping Emily get the kids in the car while Sam, Quil, and I stand back to give them room.

"Thanks for the help with moving my stuff," I nod my head at Sam.

He shrugs as if it's no big deal, "I know you'd do it for me. Besides, I'm happy to see you and Lillah getting things all worked out. You're a good man, Embry and she's a good woman; you deserve one another."

I can't say anything, so I only nod and slap Sam on the shoulder. Quil, of course, has to ruin the moment, "If it wasn't for the fact she's a distant cousin of mine, you'd have some serious competition for her."

Sam and I ignore him. When Lillah returns to me, we all say our good-night's. Quil nearly falls over when I say to Sam, "Night, Bro."

Emily and Lillah giggle at the look on his face and how he's stuttering, before Sam pushes him toward his truck, explaining everything to him. I follow Lillah into _our_ house, excited to finally "officially" be here, where I belong, with her.

-0-

Paul storms into the shop on Monday morning, tossing tools everywhere, grumbling the entire time he works and generally making everyone there miserable. Even the customers can feel his bad mood, snapping over simple things. When he comes back in from patrols he's in a slightly better mood, but Sam still pulls all of us into his office.

"Paul, I know you'd rather still be locked up with Rachel, but you need to calm the fuck down. You are pissing everyone off." Sam speaks roughly as he glares at Paul.

Paul doesn't respond, just slouches in the corner looking surlier than I've ever seen him. I'd almost think this goes beyond missing being on his honeymoon, but right now, I can't care about his issues. I have plenty of things to think about that don't include Paul and his bad mood.

When no one says anything else, we turn to leave but Sam barks out before we reach the door, "There's one more thing." We all turn back around and when I see Sam's face I know he's going to mention the brother thing. He takes a deep breath before speaking, "Some of you might have heard this already from Quil, but in case you haven't, I thought it best if you hear it from me. Embry and I are half-brothers."

For once, the room is silent for a few minutes. The quiet is finally broken by Jacob mumbling, "Thank fuck." Spinning around to him he shrugs, "Man, you are like a brother to me, but it's nice to know my dad didn't cheat on my mom."

"I know, I never thought it was your dad though. Billy's too honorable." I speak the words softly, wanting Jacob to understand I never even thought his dad would cheat.

Jacob nods, clapping Sam and I on the shoulder, "I'm heading out to patrol then I'm going to see Ness. Join whenever you can, Embry."

Jared and Paul give us their congratulations before shuffling out of the office, Paul still looking pissy. Quil is the last one left in the room and he stands in front of me, grinning, "Good thing it wasn't my dad. It would have been awkward for you to be a distant cousin with your imprint. I get the feeling Lillah doesn't like to kiss family."

"No, Lillah just doesn't like the idea of kissing you." Sam snorts as I give Quil a grin. He pushes both of us out of his way as he heads for the door to the office. Turning to Sam I give him a small smile before pointing over my shoulder, "I should probably get going."

"If you have a few minutes before you head out, I'd actually like to talk to you. We really haven't had a chance to discuss this since Friday." Sam looks just as uncomfortable as I feel.

I glance over at the chair but I can't sit still right now. Deciding that taking a slow lap around the office is my best bet, I glance over at Sam, "What's up?"

"Nothing, I just wanted to check how you're dealing with all of this. I know it's a lot to take in; I'm still trying to figure all it all out myself." Sam shrugs but his posture is stiff.

"I'm fine. I mean, still weird to think we share a father, but it doesn't really change anything," my arms are crossed and I can feel my steps speeding up but I try to blow it off.

Sam grabs my arm and pushes me into the chair, moving to sit next to me. He doesn't look at me as he speaks, "It does change things, Embry. Our father might have been a colossal asshole, but we are family because of him." He glances down at his hands, which are locked together by his fingers, "I've been thinking. I know we consider all of the guys like our brothers, but this is different. Do you remember a few weeks ago, when you had the dream about Lillah walking out on you?"

My head jerks up, unsure where he's going with this. Apparently he takes my looking up at him as acknowledgment of remembering this conversation and he continues, "Do you happen to remember me telling you about a dream I had, where Emily told me that Lillah leaving you was my 'fault'?" I nod slowly, but don't say anything, "I don't think we get these dreams randomly, Embry. Emily knew all along that we were brothers, but she never told me. However, she definitely pushed me to keep an eye on you. She kept tabs on both you and Lillah and would tell me to make sure I talked with you if I could. At the time I just thought she was concerned since she had become friends with Lillah, but now I think she was trying to prepare my stubborn ass."

"Prepare you for finding out you're my brother? How?" I know I talked with Sam a lot over the last month or two, but it was a weird time anyway, so I don't see how that would prepare him.

"By pushing me to be more than your boss and former Alpha. The more Emily asked me to talk with you, the more invested I was in making sure you didn't fuck this thing up with Lillah. I honestly think Emily would have been mad at me if things hadn't worked out with you two. She made me feel responsible for helping you through everything; she made me feel like your big brother." Sam chuckles and looks at me again, "Damn she's sneaky."

Shaking my head in agreement I let his words sink in for a few minutes. Glancing up at him I cringe slightly, "Does this mean we have to hug now?"

"God no!" Sam growls then laughs, "I do have a feeling Emily and Lillah are going to embrace the 'sister' thing. We will probably see more of each other."

"Yeah. Good thing I like your son and Claire, but do we have to have Quil around all the time too?"

Sam grumbles, "Multiply that annoyance by every night for the last six years. I'm ready to throttle the guy but I can't, because Claire will kick my ass."

"That is tough." I consider my next words carefully, "Speaking of kids, do you think us having these dreams about our family is tied to our being- brothers?"

"I don't know man. When it first happened, I kind of blew the dream off, but now," he shakes his head, glancing up at me. "We'll just have to wait and see if it happens to Jared later or even to Paul. If not, then yeah, it probably does have to do with us being brothers." He takes a gulp of air then turns to me, "I had another dream a couple of nights ago."

"Please tell me it was a dream about my wedding to Lillah going off without a hitch," I grin at him hopefully.

Sam chuckles, "You and Lillah were married, but no, it wasn't a dream about that. We were actually at your house for Christmas, Claire and Quil were trying to convince Eli and Halona to peek at their presents."

"Halona? My daughter? When- when did you have this dream?" I can barely choke the words out I'm so stunned that he would have a dream including my daughter.

"Saturday night I think. After Emily had mentioned Halona, but definitely before you mentioned anything about your dreams." I'm too shocked to say anything more, so I wave for him to continue, "Anyway, you and I were watching them, laughing at how obvious Claire and Quil were being when Emily and Lillah walked back in the room. Lillah had her camera and Emily was carrying a baby, still small, younger than Eli now. She handed him to me and said, 'Wyatt wants his Daddy now.'"

The name Wyatt triggers my own memory. Thinking back over the dreams I've had I finally remember where I've heard it. "Lillah mentioned a Wyatt in one of my dreams. She said that Emily, Claire, Eli, and Wyatt come over to help her move Halona into another room in the house."

"Ok, seriously, we have to compare notes more often on these dreams. Because in my dream, after Emily handed me the baby, I could clearly hear Lillah whispering to you that she wanted another baby."

Sam raises his eyebrows and I can't help but laugh, "Oh no, it's going to be some weird girl cycle, isn't it? You guys have a baby which makes Lillah want a baby. Then when we have another baby, that makes you guys want another one. When does it stop?"

"I don't know, but it seemed like a pretty cool life in the dream. I will tell you there was a huge present for me under the tree. Hopefully Lillah will improve your gift giving skills."

Punching him in the shoulder, I laugh, "Hey, I give good gifts!"

"Man, a distributor cap for my Suburban is not a good gift."

Sam eyes me and I shrug, "What? You needed it."

"I can get it from our wholesaler for well below cost, which is what I know you did, you cheap ass." Sam elbows me as he stands from the chair.

"True, but it's the thought that counts," I chuckle as I stand too, ready to go patrol so I can get home to Lillah.

Sam shakes his head, "Get out of my shop and go think about a better present for me for Christmas while you patrol. Your brother deserves more than a distributor cap."

"Fine, but I expect something better than a puzzle from the dollar store," I wave over my shoulder as I leave the office. "Later, Bro!"

-0-

I rush home from work that evening, anxious to see Lillah after being apart all day. Monday's are the worst so far, after spending the weekend with her, I hate going back to being separated all day by work. Thinking of work reminds me of Paul earlier and I'm suddenly interested to find out how Rachel was on her first day back from their honeymoon. I leap on the porch, bypassing the stairs and pull the front door open. When I enter the house I hear female voices coming from the direction of the kitchen so I follow the sound.

"Enough talk about my honeymoon and you being engaged. Let's get to the good stuff. How was the sex? Amazing, I'm sure. Were you unable to walk for days? Have you tried any fun positions yet? You know, as much as I love seeing Paul when we make love, it feels so good when he bends me over and just pounds me." Rachel's voice floats to me as I reach the doorway into the kitchen. I'm not surprised she's here, since it's more private for them to talk here than at school. If I didn't know better, if I didn't see the way she and Paul moon over one another and are all mushy and cuddly, I'd think she was some sort of nympho. My eyes land on Lillah's face first, she has it turned slightly and her cheeks are bright red; she looks beautiful.

Leave it to her to want details... and to give details.

"Rachel," Lillah gasps her friend's name and then giggles a little. Before either of them can say more I make my presence known by clearing my throat as I walk over to Lillah.

"Hi, beautiful," leaning down to her I kiss first her flushed cheeks then her soft mouth. When I finally release her I turn to Rachel, "Welcome back. How's it feel to be married?"

"Amazing," she says smugly. "I hear you'll be experiencing it yourself first-hand in a few weeks. Be prepared for Paul and I to get even with you two for upstaging our wedding."

"We didn't upstage it. I waited until after the wedding to tell her," I slide into the seat next to Lillah, not really upset with Rachel, but not wanting to get into an argument.

"Hmph. You should have told everyone, including Lillah, way before my wedding. But whatever, it's done now." Rachel smiles, but there is still a look that worries me in her eyes. I need to talk to Paul and Jacob about controlling her during the wedding.

Lillah leans against my chest, whispering, "Did you ask Paul today about being in the wedding?"

"I didn't really get a chance. Rach, do you mind mentioning it to him?" I don't have the heart to mention in front of Rachel the reason I didn't say anything was because I was afraid Paul would rip my head off if I even looked at him wrong today.

Rachel waves her hand, "No problem." Checking her watch she grins, "I should get going, I need to go meet my husband when he gets home from work. Later kids." She turns to walk out but speaks as she leaves, "I want details tomorrow, Lillah. You better come prepared."

Once I hear the front door slam I turn back to Lillah, pulling her into my lap to greet her properly. When we pull back from the kiss she is still blushing but she look happy, "How was your day?"

"It was fine, normal school day. Mom called me about wanting to get a caterer. I told her no, that we are doing a traditional Thanksgiving dinner, including everyone bringing a dish, for our reception. She just sighed into the phone. I told her she could have a caterer prepare her dish and she seemed a little happier." She gives a small eye roll then leans against me, "I'm almost afraid of what she'll bring."

"Don't worry, whatever she brings will be eaten. We will have at least a dozen hungry wolves here that will eat anything." Kissing her forehead I whisper, "Did she talk to you about anything other than the wedding?"

"Nope. She is still searching for someone to make our cake and deliver it here to Forks, on Thanksgiving." She sighs then looks up at me, "I'm almost tempted to tell her not to worry about it, which I know will upset her, but it's not worth the hassle. I was talking with Emily over lunch and she mentioned us making the cake."

"I know you and Emily could make an amazing cake, I just don't want you stressing over it," I whisper against her ear, nipping at it slightly.

She closes her eyes, leaning her head against my shoulder, "I'm more stressed right now not knowing what will happen about a cake. Baking doesn't stress me out, it calms me. Almost as much as being in your arms calms me." She kisses the side of my neck, "I missed you today."

"I missed you too. I didn't mean for Rachel to run out, I could have given you two some privacy to talk," my fingers kneed at her neck and shoulders, trying to help her relax.

"No, it's fine." She moans my name softly, sounding like a cat purring as my fingers move, massaging gently down then back up her spine. When I pause at her lower back, just above her ass she mumbles her enjoyment.

"What was Rachel like back at school today?" I speak softly, letting my fingers slide forward to move underneath her shirt.

Lillah's mouth moves to my neck, nipping at the skin below my ear as she whispers, "Fine. Was there any reason why you couldn't talk to Paul today?"

I do my best to focus on her words, but her mouth on my skin is distracting me. "Because Paul was a complete asshole all day. He kept biting everyone's head off, he drove us nuts."

"That's weird," Lillah leans back from me, her head twisted slightly. "Rachel said they had a great time. Barely left the hotel room," she grins at me. "Promise we will get to have a week straight of no interruptions like that on our honeymoon and I'll be happy."

"You don't want to go somewhere exotic?" I ask, suddenly very interested in her ideas for our honeymoon.

"It might be nice to be able to open the curtains and see a beautiful view out the window, but I'm more concerned with the view of you naked in bed with me for a week. A Monday where we don't have to be separated sounds amazing. Oh, and room service, we definitely need room service, because I don't want to have to leave our room."

"I think I can handle that." I grin wickedly, wiggling my eyebrows.

She giggles them lightly brushes her lips against mine, "I'll talk to Rachel tomorrow about Paul, see what's going on. Until then, since we don't have room service here, what do you want for dinner?"

"How about something easy? Spaghetti?" I suggest, not wanting to spend a lot of time on dinner tonight. I give her a small wink before letting my fingers brush softly against the underside of her breasts, "You can be my dessert tonight."

"Works for me, you are my dessert every night." She gives me a brief hug, nibbling on my ear for just a second before moving from my lap. We make quick work of dinner, preparing it together just like always. I'm smiling like an idiot when I see her plate; there is still salad there, like last time, but now it's more like half spaghetti, half salad on her plate.

She shakes her head at me when I glance up at her, "You don't have to keep checking what I eat. I got the message from Kim, and you."

I don't say anything, just smile at her. She rolls her eyes but turns in her seat, propping her legs in my lap as she eats. Once we finish, I offer to clean the kitchen while she goes to change. She walks back into the kitchen wearing a sweatshirt and yoga pants, looking adorable and tiny. The wolf in me wants to pick her up and take her into the living room; bend her over the couch like Rachel was talking about earlier and just bury myself in her until we both cum. However, I manage to push him aside for now, focusing on our task.

We make our way out to the garage, deciding to start going through my boxes from Paul and Rachel's house; dividing the things I want to keep and the things I don't. As we unpack I come across things from my childhood and I find myself telling her stories. Most of them involve me being mischievous and making my mom insane with worry; I was a typical little boy, a daredevil from the tips of my toes to the top of my head. Most of the things I tell Lillah make her laugh and she tells me she has a clear vision of what I must have been like growing up. She also feels for my mother having to raise a hellion like me.

"She was great; I wish you could have met her," I look up at her with a sad smile on my face. I can't help but be reminded how much Lillah is like my own mother. They would have loved one another, I have no doubt.

"I wish I could have met her too, Embry; I'm happy to talk to you about her, whenever you want or need to. I promise we'll always keep her alive in our home," she assures me and I pull her to my side, unable to stop the urge to bury my face in her neck and just inhale her scent. The part of me that is dying to have her be pregnant is disappointed when I just smell her, no matter how intoxicating her scent is. Not wanting her to know what I'm doing, I try to relax. Of course, having her next to me achieves that more than anything in my life ever has.

"Thank you, baby. I love you," I whisper before lifting my head and kissing her softly. She looks up at me, a smile on her face as she whispers her love for me.

"I have an idea, something that I thought might- make you happy. Feel free to tell me no if you don't like it," her words trail off and she seems unsure of herself for the first time in a long while.

"Ok? I'm sure you couldn't have an idea that I dislike," I promise her so she'll continue.

"What if we- use your mom's name for one of our- future kids? If we ever have a little girl, it might be nice to use her name. I mean- I'd like for Lee to live on through our daughter."

I gently lift her chin, my lips passing over hers softly before speaking, "_When_ we have a little girl, not if, and I'd love to use my mom's name." I hesitate for just a moment before pressing on, "I've been thinking too, about how you mentioned your grandmother's name. Since she meant so much to you, it might be nice to use her name too, _when_ we have a little girl."

Lillah snuggles up against my chest but I can feel her laughing softly, "Are we _really_ talking about baby names?"

"You brought it up," I remind her, kissing the top of her head.

She props her chin against my chest and laughs, "I know, I'm just surprised we are both thinking about this."

I shrug my shoulders like it's nothing, because I am already anticipating my future with Lillah. "My mother would have been so excited for her name to live on through a grandchild," I whisper against Lillah's mouth. "I have something to confess," her head pops up and she looks a little alarmed so I hurriedly go on. "I've had dreams about you and a little girl... named Halona."

"Really? That's-," Lillah pauses. I'm unable to tell how she's feeling so I remain quiet, letting her process this information.

She rests her head against my chest, "I'm sure it's just because we were talking about my grandmother and the Third Wife the other night."

"Maybe," I'm still not sure how she is feeling about this, but I decide not to explain my discussion with Sam just yet. "Or the spirits were trying to give me a kick in the ass," I tell her sheepishly.

This makes her laugh, "Now, that I can believe." She turns, giving me a soft smile, "I've had some pretty crazy dreams, Em. Before we met, I never would have believed half of the things I've witnessed, let alone, dreamed." She laughs, seemingly at herself, "If anyone would have ever told me this is how my life would turn out, I would have said they were crazy. People don't just turn into wolves and spirits don't send us dreams of our future. I know differently now."

"The spirits work in mysterious ways, but I don't plan to question them, not ever. Especially now that I have you in my life." Her soft lips move to mine and she whispers "I love you" against them before I deepen the contact. I shove away the box we've been going through and pull her into my lap, cupping her ass in my hands and holding her tight against me.

I pull away to give us both the chance to breathe and my voice is raspy when I speak, "What do you say we save the rest of the unpacking for another day?" My lips hover over hers as her eyes flutter closed and her head nods lightly. Her light panting breaths are drowned out by the moan that bubbles up in her chest when our lips make contact again. I stand, lifting Lillah with me and she wraps her legs around my waist. Carrying her from the garage, I pause when we pass the doorway to the living room.

She looks up at me and giggles, "What are you thinking?"

"I'm trying to decide if I want to make love you in our bedroom or bend you over the sofa and fuck you," I admit, glancing down at her.

Her entire body shivers in my arms and she barely manages to choke out, "Sofa."

_Ah, thank fuck. She said exactly what I'd hoped._

Carrying her, over I sit her on the edge of the couch arm, my mouth latching onto hers with intensity. Her mouth is hot on mine, her tongue pressing against my own, stroking gently in a rhythm she sets herself. My hands grip her hips, pulling her against me in time with our mouths. The strokes of her body against mine torture me; it's amazing to feel the things her body does to mine, especially since I never thought I would have this with her.

Pulling my mouth away from Lillah's I kiss my way down her chin, to her neck and then over to the spot just below her jaw. Nipping at her skin playfully I grin again when I hear her moan, goose bumps popping up on the skin under my tongue as I pull it into my mouth, sucking gently.

Her thighs tighten around me, pulling me closer to her while her heels dig into my ass. I press my dick into her, knowing that she's already getting wet from our kisses. I can feel the heat of her through the cotton pants she's wearing and it makes me harder, knowing I'm going to be pushing into her soon. My hands move from her hips to the waist band of her pants, dipping below the elastic until I can cup her silky flesh in my hands.

"Sexiest ass," I mutter against the skin of Lillah's neck and she rewards me with that giggle I love so much.

Her hands run up my back and into my hair, tugging it until I lift my face to look at her. She's biting down on her bottom lip, her eyelids heavy with need and I'm left with zero doubt what it is she's after. My beautiful woman wants to be fucked. I feel a vibration begin to build in my chest and it surfaces as a low growl. I typically suppress my predatory and possessive side, but knowing what she wants tonight, I know I won't be able to hold myself back tonight.

Wrapping one arm around Lillah's waist I use the other hand to tug at her pants, helping her quickly free her body of them. I pull the cotton of her panties down along with the pants, moving them down her delicious thighs, over her knees and off of her calves.

"How am I always the one that gets naked first?" she asks, looking up at me through her lashes. I can't help the broad grin that spreads across my face. Releasing her I reach back to pull my shirt up and over my head then toss it on the floor. Next are my pants; I flip the button open then unzip them, anxious to get myself out of my confines. My dick is killing me, trapped behind the denim of my jeans.

"Better?" I ask and raise my eyebrows in question. Lillah doesn't say anything; her mouth just works open and closed a few times before she moans a "mmm" while looking down at me. Seeing that she is distracted I reach out, gripping the tail of her sweatshirt in my hand. Her arms automatically lift when I move the shirt up her torso and it reaches her tits. After I've discarded it I stand there looking down at her. She's wearing something I've never seen before; a lacy peach colored bra with a tiny light blue bow nestled between her breasts. Her nipples are hard beneath the fabric and I watch as my hand reaches up to gently stroke one tight pebble with the back of my fingers.

Once all of our clothes are discarded I stop wasting my time and do what I really want; like take her breasts in my hands and pinch her nipples. Or run my hands down her stomach, to the incredible spot between her legs. I watch her body shutter and quake against mine and it turns me on more. She's so beautiful and sexy; everything about her draws me in, makes me need her. She gasps when I lift her quickly, standing her in front of me so I can lean down to kiss her roughly. I can't stand there for too long because she presses her body to mine, my hard on trapped against her belly while she twists her hips against me.

Unable to wait any longer I spin her around, keeping my hands on her waist so she doesn't lose her balance. I pull her against my chest, one arm around her smooth stomach while the other moves lightly over each of her breasts, teasing lovingly. Her moans grow louder and when her hips jerk against mine hard I swear my cock might break in half; I move down her stomach and over her hip until I am cupping her in my hand. She's hot and wet and we both moan at the contact of my fingers on her body, pushing into her, stroking her body into a frenzy.

"Embry," she grumbles and I laugh, my mouth next to her ear so she can hear me clearly.

"You want me to fuck you, baby?" I ask and the only thing she can do is nod her head rapidly.

I move my hand from her pussy, gripping her hip while I unwrap my other arm from around her torso. My fingers stroke up her back until they reach the nape of her neck, twisting her hair around my hand before I gently push her. She automatically leans forward, her arms resting on the couch cushion like we've done this a dozen times. I run a hand over the curve of her ass, appreciating the pale skin as her hips twitch with every caress. Seeing her this way is a whole new experience. It takes every bit of my strength not to pound into her without a second thought.

My hands move up her back, tickling her spine as I step closer, allowing the head of my dick to touch her. She stands on her tip toes, lifting her hips up to meet me. I grin as I watch her body arch, asking me to fill her. _No way could I ever deny either of us, the arousal pumping through both of our veins intoxicates me._

I place my hands on her hips, gripping them with my fingers to stop her movements so I can give both of us what we want. Moving a hand around I cradle her abdomen to support her weight when her legs eventually give out. She whimpers when I move the head of my dick against her pussy, swiping it along her slick opening, coating myself with her arousal, torturing us both. She struggles to press her hips back against me but I don't allow her to move.

The sounds that are echoing in the room around us nearly push me over the edge. I begin to slide into her and I'm rewarded with the rapid beat of her heart and the shallow breaths that catch in her throat. She is so beautiful like this, making it hard for me to control myself. She surprises me when a feminine growl escapes her and I know then I'm playing with fire this time; she wants no more teasing, and I have to agree with her.

When I finally take her fully I'm not so gentle, pushing into her fast and hard. We both moan and my body doubles over from the intensity of having her this way. It's always amazing when she surrounds me with her tight heat but this new angle is unlike anything else we've done. My hands tighten into fists and my body shakes with the battle that is raging inside of me. Even though I know it's what she wants, I'm afraid if I pound into her too hard, I'll hurt her with my strength.

Shifting my hips I barely pull out of her then before the whimper that is building in her chest can escape, I push back into her, a little faster this time. Her hips lifting as high as I'll allow are like an invitation for me to do it again. One of my hands runs up her stomach, palming one of her breasts while the other hand helps keep her balanced. I nose her hair out of the way and begin kissing the back of her neck, sucking at her salty skin before I move down her spine. Once I'm standing I once again place both hands on her hips, using the curves of her body to hold her while I pull my dick back out. Her body tightens around me, trying to draw me back in but I don't let her succeed.

Just as the tip of my head pulls out of her my hips jerk forward, plunging so deep I swear I'm not able to see where I end or she begins. My eyes are drawn to the spot between our bodies and I can't look away; watching her body under mine, hearing the whimpers of my name, it all keeps me going, harder, faster.

She uses her arms on the couch cushions as leverage to push her hips back to meet mine. Every time I think I've gone too far, I've hurt her, she cries out my name, begging me for more. Moving one hand back to her stomach, I slide the other back up to her hair, wrapping her silky strands in my fingers and pulling gently. She screams and I can feel her pussy tightening around me more, her body nearing its breaking point. Leaning over her, I tug her hair until she turns her face up to meet mine. Her lips move against mine at the same choppy rhythm as her hips. Pulling back from her I manage to growl out, "I fucking love you, so much."

When I slam into her again, her entire body begins to quiver around me and for the first time, I can't control myself any longer. The animal takes over, pushing me to overwhelm her; my teeth sink into her shoulder, my fingers on her stomach move to find her clit, and I pull her back to me just as I thrust my hips forward. My animal side is fucking proud of himself as I watch her explode around me, but I'm unable to watch for more than a few seconds because her pussy is squeezing my own orgasm out of me. I can't even pull myself out, my hips barely moving against her as I let go of my control.

-0-

I'm impressed with myself when I realize I've managed to both remain standing and keep Lillah propped up. Unable to move far, I slowly scoop her up in my arms and sit down on the very cushions she was just propping herself up on. The only sound in the room is our labored breathing. After a few minutes I manage to choke out, "Did I hurt you?"

Unable to look at her, I cringe as I prepare myself for the worst. "Are you kidding?" My head shoots up at her words and I'm stunned to find her smiling at me. Her fingernails scrape along my cheeks as she speaks, "Em, baby, I know I'm not a big, bad, wolf like you, but I won't break. That was- amazing; different, but amazing just like every other time."

"Are you sure you aren't in pain?" I hate myself for even having to ask this, but I'd hate myself more if she was in pain because of me and I didn't help her to feel better.

Her lips move over mine, teasing as she whispers, "I'm fine, I promise, but I wouldn't turn down a bath with my Wolf Charming."

Shaking my head at her silly nickname for me, I manage to gather all my strength to carry her into bathroom. We stay in the bath until the water cools so much that there are goosebumps popping up on her shoulders. We get settled in the bed and she curls up against me. Just before she falls asleep I hear her whisper, "Em, don't get any thoughts. We will be doing that again. Soon."

I suppress the chuckle that bubbles up at her words. _She knows me so damn well._ Leaning over her I whisper, "Don't worry, baby. I'd never dream of telling you 'no'."

"Good boy," she mumbles sleepily and I shake my head at her "dog" reference. As much as I want to protest, I know all I want to be for the rest of her life is her "good boy".

-0-

**A/N:** We've been posting pictures and things on our tumblr so be sure to check that out! There's Lillah's ring and pictures of Lillah and Embry's house. http:/stupidleeches[dot]tumblr[dot]com. We also post NSFW things so watch out!

Just a heads up, we are taking a week off for Christmas/New Year's, but will be back to our normal schedule on Tuesday, January 4. Merry Christmas & Happy New Year to everyone! - NKR & WH


	39. Chapter 39 Strange And New

**Chapter 39 "Strange And New"**

**Disclaimer: **Not SM. Sorry to disappoint.

**A/N: **The end is near. HEA is approaching quickly. Hope you enjoy!

_Finally got out of my own way  
I've finally started living for today  
I finally know that I needed to grow  
And finally my mate has met my soul_

_Finally  
Now my destiny can begin  
Though we will have a our differences  
Something strange and new is happening  
_"Finally" - Fergie

**LPOV**

I poke my head around Rachel's open class room door. She's moving some misplaced seats around the room and looks over her shoulder, her long black hair flipping through the air.

"Lillah! How's it going?" She stands gracefully, meeting me with open arms at her desk. Her hug is tight, which is surprising since we just saw each other yesterday.

"Great! How are you, Mrs. Foster?" I grin, taking a seat across from her paper covered desk. She tilts her head to the side and just smiles smugly. "That good?" I ask with a little giggle.

"We're good. I dropped my pictures off this morning; I can't wait to show you the beautiful hotel he took me to."

That statement definitely gets my attention and I wrinkle my nose. "I'm not sure if I _want_ to see your pictures," I tell her with a raised brow.

Rachel playfully slaps at my hand and we both snicker, "That's not what I meant, but you know me better than I thought!" I can't help but to nod because it's true, even though it's only been a few months, I feel like I know her pretty well.

Propping my chin on my hand I sigh dreamily then ask, "So was it everything you thought it would be? Was it amazing, being away from home and just having Paul all to yourself?"

Rachel nods her head and her eyes go glassy for a second. "It was nice having privacy. Knowing one of the guys wasn't going to just walk through the front door; and that has happened, more than once, just a heads up." My eyes go a little wide and I file that away for later, making sure that Embry and I keep the doors locked. We don't want another incident like the one with Angela.

"Embry mentioned that Paul was pretty- upset at the shop yesterday," I confide in her. She nods and sighs while she leans back in her seat, getting comfortable before speaking.

"Yeah, it's kind of silly. He's annoyed that he hasn't knocked me up or something. I don't get why these guys are obsessed with this right now." Rachel and I both shake our heads. I doubt any of us will ever really understand how a guys brain works.

"I told him we aren't in competition with Emily and Sam, Kim and Jared, or even you and Embry. He's just so determined to begin a family; he has been for a while actually but I wanted to wait until we were married. Now that we are, he expects my belly to pop out magically, I guess."

The picture that puts in my head makes me giggle and I shrug, "Embry is so excited that I could be pregnant that he is constantly checking me now. I don't think he knows I realize what he's up to, but he's always sniffing me. I'm guessing Sam and Jared gave him more details about how they could tell their imprints were pregnant so he's- sniffing- for whatever it is they smelled."

I sit up quickly, suddenly realizing Rachel doesn't know about Embry and Sam being brothers. I know Embry won't mind me telling her so I go for it. "Rachel, you aren't going to believe what happened while you and Paul were away. Embry and I had dinner with Sam and Emily-," I go through the events of the evening, telling her about Emily's dreams and my grandmother's name. Then finally, that Joshua Uley was Embry's father. Rachel's mouth drops open and stays that way through most of my tale.

When I'm done she finally speaks, her voice full of shock, "Wow. I guess it all makes sense now, doesn't it? Sam and Embry. Brothers." Rachel's eyes light up after she has a chance to think more, "And you and Emily will be sister-in-laws!"

"I know, it's insane, right? I'm so happy that Embry finally knows. He was relieved that it was Sam and not-" I pause but Rachel realizes what I mean.

"My dad? Yeah, there had been suspicion about that, I guess, but I never felt like he would do that to Mom. They loved one another so much, Daddy has never been the same since she passed."

Rachel's eyes are a little misty at the mention of her mother. I know it must have been hard for her, to have gotten married and now be starting a life with her new husband, without her mother by her side. As much as my mom is driving me crazy over planning this wedding, I can't imagine doing it without her. I reach out a hand and place it on top of hers. "That's what's Embry said. I know how great Billy is so I bet your mother was spectacular."

"She was. You would have loved her. Daddy says I'm a lot like her," she tells me, grinning proudly. "So!" Rachel begins brightly and I can tell she's finished with that part of our conversation, "What's been happening with you and Embry? You weren't able to give me too much dirt before he walked in yesterday."

"Well..." I begin, my words tumbling over one another while I talk as fast as I can, before any of the students start arriving. I don't tell Rachel too many details but we share some squealing laughter and a lot of sighs and swoons until I have to scamper off to my own classroom.

I wave at her over my shoulder as she calls after me, "See you later! I can't wait to pick out my dress! It will be epic!"

-0-

After school Rachel and I meet up with Angela and Emily; then head off to Port Angeles. When we arrive Mom is already there browsing through the racks of formal wear. I ask one of the women at the shop if I can try on my wedding gown, since Mom and Angela haven't seen it yet, plus I need the reminder so I can look for shoes. She brings the dress out first, opening the garment bag for everyone to see. Mom gasps and reaches out, stopping just short of touching the lacy fabric.

"Oh Lillah, baby," tears fill her eyes and Angela walks over to take a peek too. She rests her head on Mom's shoulder and they both smile at it.

"It's so beautiful, Lillah," Angela tells me with a happy sigh.

"You should see her _in_ it!" Emily approaches us with a grin on her face. Before I know it I'm being shoved into a dressing room while the proper undergarments are flung over the door. I require a little help getting the back all buttoned up and Rachel comes in to do the job before I step out. I stand on the platform, barefoot and with my hair hanging down along my shoulders just like the last time; but this time, my smile is wide as I look at myself in the mirror and see the other girls looking at me.

"It's amazing," Mom takes my hand in hers and we stare at one another for a few long seconds. She squeezes my hand gently then turns to look at the full length mirror. "I think it's perfect, Lillah; Embry's going to love it."

I take a nervous breath and look myself up and down, turning just slightly so I can see the back, "I hope he will. I think it's just right. Not too fancy but feminine enough." I muse then glance back at Mom again, "Did I tell you Emily secretly had this dress shop hold it for me after I tried it on just for 'fun'?"

Mom's eyes go wide and she looks over and Emily, who grins and tells her, "She would have hated herself for missing out on it. Plus, it was on sale, and it was a perfect fit for her. I know someone would have snapped it up quickly if I hadn't intervened."

Mom nods in agreement and thanks her, "I believe you're right. There couldn't be a more perfect dress."

Finally realizing how much time we are spending on me I clap my hands together and twirl around to face the girls. "Ok, you all have some dresses to pick out! This trip is about you, not me. I have my fairytale gown now we need to find something amazing for the rest of you."

The sales lady that helped us with Rachel's wedding steps up and asks if I have a particular color in mind for the wedding. I look around the shop, suddenly seeing all the different options for colors. I somehow hadn't put any thought into that part of it. I felt like it would fall into place when the time came, but now the time is here and I have no ideas.

"The wedding is on the beach but it's in two weeks so fall colors would be ok," I muse and we begin searching.

The girls wander around the store while the sales lady helps me out of my gown. When I walk out of the dressing room, they are holding up beautiful and hideous dresses of various colors for me to review. None of these feel "right", so I help them in the search; in the back of my mind I keep telling myself I should be looking for shoes as well but I keep pushing it aside. My thoughts are broken into when I hear Emily squeal. I turn to face her and she comes skipping over, "What about this?"

She's holding up a dress of chocolate brown satin with a cute ribbon tied around the waist. Looking down at my ring I realize the ribbon matches the fire opal perfectly. "Emily, I think that is pretty much perfect. Rachel, Ang, Mom! Come look at this," I call across the store and they all come running. After a couple "oh's" and "ah's" they all set out to find different dress styles in the same colors while I wander over to a case of bridal accessories.

I want to purchase something fun but practical for my friends and family but I'm not sure what I want yet. I spot a bracelet that can be engraved and my eyes catch one of the sales ladies, who quickly comes over to help me. While the others are distracted I manage to purchase the bracelets and fill out the monogramming information. This is exactly the type of thing I was looking for. It can be casual or dressy, just like the women I love. I also purchase one for Kim and Ness, even though they aren't in the wedding party. I'd like to give them a gift, something that ties us all together.

After the dresses are all picked out and measurements taken we leave the shop. I stop Mom on the way out, pulling her aside so we can talk privately. After a little lip biting I manage to explain to her the idea of Emily and I making our wedding cake. She hesitates at first, but finally agrees, knowing we are running out of options. Once that is decided, I mention the "bachelor/bachelorette" dinner at the house this Saturday, asking if she and Daddy want to join.

She's surprised that this is how we are going to celebrate our last days of "freedom" but I explain that we decided we didn't want to go party. Of course, I leave out the part where I had to _convince_ a very stubborn Embry before he agreed to host it at our house. Just like with the reception, he didn't want me stressing over cooking, but he finally caved when I told him it wasn't stressful when I would be getting to spend time with my family and friends, celebrating our future.

-0-

"My Wolf Charming," I whisper softly as I wrap my arms around Embry's neck. "I have a favor to ask of you."

This week has been a whirlwind of wedding planning, cleaning, and unpacking for Embry and I. Any free time has gone into making the house look great for tonight's faux bachelor/bachelorette party. I managed not to get too stressed about anything so far, but now that everyone is here and dinner is ready to be served, I'm suddenly aware of a huge problem.

He lifts an eyebrow in question and I can't help giggling at how adorable he looks tonight. Pulling him down so his ear is against my lips I speak as low as possible so no one else can hear us, "Would you grab me a sparkling grape juice instead of champagne, just in case? I don't want Mom or Daddy making a big deal about it, but they'll be right with me when we get our food."

When he turns his head I can see his eyes dancing with laughter and I know I'm in trouble. He moves so his mouth is against my ear now and I shiver, "Consider it done, but I thought you didn't care if your parents found out."

I narrow my eyes at him but whisper back, "I don't care, but I don't want them to make a scene in the middle of the party, especially since we don't know-." My words fall off, unsure of what else to say. It's only been two weeks, and in my head I know that isn't much time, but I'm getting anxious. I know I'm being stupid, some couples try for years to get pregnant, but I'm really starting to think something is wrong with me; Embry should have noticed something by now.

"Plus," I add, trying to hide my nerves with a smile, "do you want my dad to find out this way?"

Embry cringes then nods his head before pulling away from me. I watch him, with a sigh of contentment, as he wanders off in the direction of the kitchen. I feel a light touch on my elbow and I turn to find my mother watching me while wearing a soft smile. "Hi, baby; everything smells amazing. I can't believe you are feeding all of us here when you should be out celebrating like other young couples."

"Mom, Embry and I only want to celebrate with our friends and family. You know I'm not the going out type anyway," I wave a hand at her as if to say it's all no big deal. As much work as it was to pull all of this together, I started early this morning and didn't stop until people started arriving, I wouldn't have it any other way. I know my face is flushed from the rushing around I've been doing to get all the food set out for dinner, but I don't mind; I'm blissfully happy.

Before everyone sits down, my parents, along with Sam and Emily, toast Embry and me. I'm so thankful he grabbed me the grape juice when I take a sip from my glass, my parents eying me as I drink. I give them a happy smile before waving everyone to sit and start eating.

Between the boisterous conversation of the pack members and the laughter and merriment from the girls over the wedding details, dinner is a whirlwind of activity. Claire has easily charmed my dad and every time I glance over at Mom she has her eyes locked on Eli. Embry takes my glass and refills it whenever it starts to get low, but he almost has a coronary when my dad tries to pour me some wine. I manage to explain away Embry's reaction by saying he knows I prefer the white then try to relax when my parents thankfully let it go. Rachel, who is seated across from me giggles and I lightly tap her leg with my foot. _Could we be any more obvious?_ Angela's looks over at the two of us but I just shake my head and she grins.

Once dinner is over with we all move to the living room to relax; the conversation moves from the wedding to discussing Paul and Rachel's honeymoon to just every day mundane things. I'm so happy to see the pack accepting my parents and Angela and Ben; of course, there are things that can't be discussed with them here, but everyone is still themselves, warm and loving just like they've been with me all along.

"It's nice to see this house full again, your grandmother loved having friends and family over here. Growing up it felt like Christmas here every weekend because of all the people; there was always someone visiting or a party being thrown." Daddy gives me a kiss on the cheek before whispering, "As long as you are happy, that is all I can ask for." I can't say anything but I manage to bob my head up a down a few times. Daddy grins at me then turns back to Mom.

Hearing Daddy talk about how the house was when he was growing up makes me more certain that this life, being with Embry here in this house, is what was searching for when I decided to come home to Forks. A simple life, with a loving man, surrounded by my family and closest friends.

I'm pulled out of my musings when I feel Embry playing with my engagement ring; I glance up at Emily only to find Sam doing the same thing with her wedding ring. We both giggle which makes Sam and Embry look up. When we continue to laugh instead of explaining, they shrug it off, returning to their conversations. Embry pulls me into his side as he talks to my dad about the Seahawks. My eyes are just starting to close, now that I'm curled up next to Embry, when I feel eyes on me. I glance up to find Mom watching Embry's movements, a smile on her face. She glances up, catching me and I smile at her, surprised when tears spring into her eyes.

Mom leans forward and I meet her, reaching for her hands with my right hand; neither of us speaks, it's not really necessary.

During a lull in conversation I glance over and see Quil playing peek-a-boo with Eli. I clear my throat and he glances up at me. "Daddy," turning to my dad I smile and nod my head in Quil's direction, "did you catch that Quil is an Ateara?"

Daddy's eyebrows spring up in surprise and he turns to face Quil, "No, I'm sorry, I didn't. You're an Ateara? No, kidding!"

Freeing my hand from Embry, I open my arms, excited for my turn with Eli. Quil grins proudly and stands up, handing Eli over to me before he moves to sit next to my dad. "I understand we're family?"

Daddy and Quil begin a conversation that lasts for a good portion of the rest of our evening. I can tell that Daddy loves making the family connections with him, his hands animated as he talks and laughs with Quil. Embry pulls my face close to him and kisses my cheek, making me turn to look at him. He has the biggest smile on his face and I know he's just as pleased as I am that things are going so well.

As I'm playing with Eli, his face suddenly goes very red and I look up at Emily. She giggles but tells me to follow her. I give Embry a quick peck on the cheek before standing with Eli to follow Emily to the bedroom. I'm not surprised when I see Mom following behind us, waving her in before I shut the door.

"Oh, Eli, you stinky boy you! What did those boys sneak onto your plate tonight?" Eli just giggles happily, his face now back to his normal rich brown color.

I lean down over him, kissing his forehead, "Was it your Uncle Embry? You can tell me. I'll yell at him for you."

Mom, standing at the foot of the bed, looks shocked at my words, "'Uncle'? I thought Embry was an only child."

Emily looks to me to explain, and I give Mom the condensed version, "Embry's mom never told him who his father was, but before she passed away, she told Emily. She requested that Emily not share the truth with Embry until he was with someone. Once Embry and I were engaged, Emily asked us over to the house and she told us what his mom had shared with her, including that Embry shared a father with Sam."

Emily jumps in, "The guys are all really close, so Claire and Eli call them 'Uncle' any way. I just made it official by telling Embry and Lillah what Lee had shared with me."

"So you will be gaining a brother, sister-in-law, niece and nephew when you marry Embry?" Mom grins at me.

Nodding I grin over at Emily, "Essentially!"

Emily finishes changing Eli's diaper and winks up at me, "Plus at least one more baby will be joining our little group soon."

My mom raises an eyebrow at me, a knowing smile on her face, but before I can correct her Emily jumps in, "Oh no, not Lillah and Embry, Mrs. Hunter! Kim and Jared are pregnant, she's due in the summer."

"I'm sure Rachel will be pregnant soon, too, if she isn't already," I manage to choke out, trying to distract my mom from thinking about me.

Eli starts whimpering and Emily looks up at me apologetically, "Would you mind heating up his bottle? There are a couple already made up in his bag."

"No problem, I'll be right back." I grab a bottle from his bag and quickly move to the kitchen. While I wait for the bottle to warm up, I'm surprised to see Mom followed me.

She looks around, "Do you want me to help you clean up?"

"You don't have to." I grin at her, "That's usually Embry's contribution to dinner; cleaning up. We'll take care of it either tonight or tomorrow."

Once the bottle is ready, I take it back to Emily, closing the bedroom door so she can feed him in peace. Mom is waiting for me when I turn around, giving me a quick hug, "You are really good with those two kids. Your face just lit up when Quil handed him to you."

"Eli is a special boy," I grin up at her as I move to take a step toward the living room.

Mom stops me, a small smile on her face, "It sounds like a lot of your friends are starting families."

I nod in agreement but don't say anything. Mom sighs softly, "I'm assuming you and Embry plan on starting a family pretty quickly?"

"Yes, but we want to start a family for us, not because of all of our friends. Of course, it will be nice to have all of our kids grow up together, but this is what Embry and I want. As much as I love teaching, the one night I got to spend watching Claire and Eli made me realize just how much I want to be a mom."

When I pause, Mom pulls me back into a tight hug, "Alright then, I'll start trying to ease your father into the idea of being a grandfather. This is going to take a while."

"You've got time." I hesitate before confessing to my mom, "I'm not pregnant, but we decided to start trying, in case I have any problems."

"Why would you have problems, honey?" Mom wipes away a couple of tears that have escaped without my realizing.

"I don't know, my body has just been really irregular with my weight loss this summer, so I'm a little worried. Did you have any problems- conceiving?" As awkward as it is to ask this of my mom, I figure I should know, just in case there are any hereditary issues.

Mom actually laughs, "Absolutely not. Within a few weeks of your father and me deciding we wanted a baby, I was pregnant. Your great-grandmother claimed the Quileute men had 'special powers' when it came to creating the next generation."

I bite my tongue, unable to say anything more after that statement. Mom shakes her head, laughing as she wraps her arm around my shoulder, leading me back into the living room. Embry pulls me into his arms once I'm within range and I curl up in his lap. The buzz of conversation is soothing, blending with Embry's steady heartbeat. I'm not sure when I fall asleep, but I wake up only briefly, when Embry is undressing me. I help as much as I can, but I'm unable to fight to keep my eyes open, quickly giving back in to the pull of slumber.

-0-

Sunday morning I wake up to the smell of coffee brewing and an empty bed. After this past week I was looking forward to a quite morning in bed with Embry, but if he's up and moving, I probably should be too. My parents stayed in Angela's old room last night and I know they'll be heading out soon. Plus, I still need to clean up the kitchen from yesterday and at least change the sheets and wash some clothes. I'm just about to throw the covers off of me when I hear Embry's voice, "Do not get out of that bed."

"May I at least go to the bathroom?" I call out, suppressing my laughter when Embry acquiesces.

Once I brush my teeth and untangle my hair, I change into comfy clothes for the day; one of Embry's t-shirts and yoga pants. As I'm stepping out of the bathroom, there is a soft knock on the bedroom door. I'm not surprised to see my mom poke her head in the room after I call out to enter.

"I just wanted to let you know your father and I are heading out," she grins at me without stepping in the room.

"Ok," I move to the door but Mom shakes her head.

"You are supposed to stay in here. Embry said so." She hasn't stopped smiling, which makes this whole conversation feel odd.

"Ok, but I want to say goodbye to you and Daddy."

Mom opens the door all the way and steps into the room, giving me a quick hug, "Bye, honey. Have a good week. I'll see you on Thursday for your final dress fitting?"

"Sure Mom." My arms have barely fallen to my side before she steps back out of the room and Daddy takes her spot, pulling me into a hug and kissing the top of my head.

"I had a great time, kiddo. Embry is good for you, I see that now." He leans back, grinning at me, "I still don't like him stealing my daughter from me, but I guess I have to accept it. I'll see you next weekend, right?"

"Yes, Daddy."

He gives me a curt nod then turns around, waving once before he closes the bedroom door. I sink back to the bed, a little sad at their leaving. I know I'll see them next weekend, but it's still hard to say goodbye. I'm getting a little spoiled getting to see them so much recently.

The door opening again grabs my attention and I look up to find a grinning Embry carrying in a tray full of food. I start to stand to help him, but he shakes his head at me. Once he sets the tray on the bed he leans over and kisses me, "Good morning."

"Morning, baby. What's all this?" I point at the tray while grinning from ear to ear.

"I want to treat you since you made dinner for everyone last night," he shrugs as if to say 'no big deal'. It may not be huge to Embry but the gesture makes my heart constrict. He taps my thigh and I scoot back, getting comfortable against the pillows. Holding a hand out to Embry I wait for him to climb in with me before I begin eating.

The amount of food on the tray is unbelievable; enough for Embry and I for sure. I offer him a bite of French toast before I take one myself.

"You planning on holding me hostage all day?" I ask while I crunch on some bacon.

He cocks his head to the side and closes one eye while he studies me, "I was thinking about it. Did you have something you needed to take care of today?"

"Not particularly, no. I was just planning to do some cleaning and then spend the rest of the day with you," I tell him while I take a bite of eggs then offer him some too.

"Kitchen's done," Embry tells me around a mouthful of cheesy eggs and my mouth falls open. He must have been out of bed for longer than I realized.

"Embry, you didn't have to-," I begin but he cuts me off by kissing my lips.

"I know. I wanted to," he offers me another bite of French toast after taking the fork from my hand.

Grinning down at our plate of food I once again realize how blessed I am to have him. I notice a little pool of syrup floating on the now empty plate and dip my finger into it. Turning to Embry I place my finger against his bottom lip, smearing the sticky stuff across it before I lean forward to kiss him. He growls against my mouth and I'm unable to hold back the little giggle that escapes.

The fork in his hand clangs when it hits the plate and he takes my face between his wide palms. His fingers thread into my hair, curling and tugging gently, sending shivers up my spine. I cuddle closer to him and the vibrations in his chest course through me, making me moan into his lips.

I love this side of him; the aggressive, growly, 'make me wet with just one kiss' side. Embry doesn't allow him to make an appearance often but when he does- Mmm. His mouth leaves mine and begins to move down my neck, sucking gently while his teeth bite my exposed skin. Before I realize what he has in mind, he is leaving a trail of syrup down my neck. He pulls the neck of my t-shirt down, exposing my collar bone and begins licking, one complete stroke from the base of my neck to my jaw.

When he reaches my earlobe he tugs at it with his mouth then pulls away, just barely. I think I might lose my ability to breathe when he purrs, _yes- purrs_, next to my ear. My mouth flops open, opening and closing while my brain tries to form words. It's almost no use and I hear him chuckle when the only sound that I can make is a whimper. _Evil man_.

Placing my hands on his chest I push him away, needing to take a few breaths so I can gather my wits. "I think I'm done with breakfast," I tell him in panting breaths. His eyes meet mine, an intense stare sending my heart racing, then he reaches for the tray. Before I know it he's off of the bed and out the door, taking it back to the kitchen. I lean forward, trying to see through the doorway, hoping he isn't taking the time to clear dishes or anything crazy like that.

He comes bursting back through the door, not letting up as he reaches the bed and practically dives at me. _Well, hello._I squeal out a giggle as he kneels in front of me and grabs my thighs, pulling me toward him so that I'm now lying flat on the mattress. His hands move down to my knees and he begins tugging my pants down. I keep my eyes on his and when he flicks his up to look at me I can see that he's barely hanging on by a thread. My eyebrows shoot up in question and he doesn't speak, just lets out another growl, surprising me. I've seen him a little intense before, but it always manages to surprise me, since he normally holds himself back so much.

He has my pants discarded before I can blink. He follows them rather quickly with my panties then works to remove my shirt as well. He smiles at the bra I'm wearing; a front clasp, which he flips open easily, freeing my breasts into his waiting hands. He leans down, his mouth tugging and nipping, drawing moans and whimpers from my mouth. The sounds from his mouth make me wetter, my body flushing all over; damn if I don't want him- need him, desperately.

Pulling his face away from my chest with my hands I have to hold back the half giggle, half groan when he fights me and pulls my nipple harder, making it ache. He releases me and looks up, almost annoyed at being interrupted. "I want you inside of me, if you don't mind," I say with a quirk of my right eyebrow. It's been a few days since Embry and I have been together. Between work and wedding preparations, not to mention my parents being here last night, I've been exhausted lately and keep falling asleep in his arms before we even make it to the bedroom.

He doesn't speak but his tongue darts out to wet his lips. I release his face and watch as he moves down to kiss my stomach. At first I think he's just going to kiss the one spot but he keeps moving further and I realize what he's after. My hands shoot out to stop him, gripping his shoulders beneath my fingertips. "No," I tell him and he looks up sharply, fire in his eyes. "That isn't necessary. I'd like to make love to you; to be fucked, hard and fast."

My words barely make it out of my mouth before he's moving so fast I'm surprised I can see him. His clothes are gone in a matter of seconds and I spread my legs, giving him room to rest between them. He doesn't allow his body to rest against mine completely; instead, his hand drifts between our bodies, leaving no doubts what he's after. When his palm cups me and his fingers begin to push into me I grip the sheets in my fist.

Embry whispers words of praise in a gruff voice as my hips begin moving in circles. "Beautiful, sexy, Lillah. Hot and wet in my hand. Fucking tight- impossibly tight... drives me crazy. Want to fuck you; so hard." His words are choppy, his voice deep and rumbly.

Words begin to roll from my tongue, keeping a rhythm with my hips and his fingers. "Please, please, oh God please." I work to focus my eyes on Embry's face and I realize he's smirking down at me; his cocky grins fills his face but his eyes are still full of wonder as he watches me. Releasing my grip on the sheets I reach up and grab his face, trying unsuccessfully to pull his lips to mine and I'm once again reminded that my strength is nothing compared to his. Before I can protest I feel Embry's hand leave my body and my eyes dart down. He's palming his erection, moving the tip of his head to press into me. _Finally!_

I'm inhaling gasping breaths as Embry teases me, pushing in only slightly then pulling back out, only to start the process back over again. Opening my mouth to speak, to tell him to hurry it up already, I realize I can't catch my breath and I grunt at him instead. He laughs, drawing my attention, then I realize I'm not only whimpering but there are sighs and low growls interspersed. I giggle and my face brightens; I've never physically reacted this way before, I've almost always maintained some sort of control; certainly I've never _growled_.

There's not enough time for me to say or do anything because Embry's hands are on my thighs, pulling them up, pressing my knees into my chest. He pushes into me, hard, fast and to the hilt. I think I'm dying, or something. Maybe I'm just skipping straight to an orgasm, bypassing the usual bits and pieces that come before it. Embry pulls out slowly but the absence of him filling me doesn't last too long. He joins with me again, pushing a little harder, sending me sliding against the bed sheets. Fuck. Me. _Oh, wait..._

My left leg beings to cramp and I absently tap Embry's arm until he releases me. Wrapping it around his waist I use the little bit of leverage to pull him closer to me. The change in position has him entering me at a different angle and I don't bother suppressing the long drawn out "ungh" that escapes.

"Damn, baby, you are so fucking sexy," Embry's voice is muffled against my neck, where he's placed his face and is kissing his way down. His lips make their way to the swell of my breasts then lower, stopping at my nipples. Nipping teeth and his stroking tongue make my breasts ache for more while his light scruff abrades my skin. When I lift my chest to beg, he sucks harder, nearly sending me over the edge. There's a tightening in my stomach, a rubber band being wound around and around until I think it might break. With his mouth on me this way, mimicking the movements of our hips, I know there isn't much of a chance that I'll last longer.

I bury one of my hands in his hair, tugging and twisting my fingers through it because it's the only thing I can grab. His body is all hard bunched muscles and smooth skin, nothing extra in sight or under hand. His hips begin to move faster, rougher; his thrusts aren't as smooth as they were, now they are breaking rhythm and I know he's close too.

"Little harder," I beg him in panting breaths. My head is titled just a little as I watch him at my other breast. His free hand is cupping the one his mouth just left and it's massaging gently, his thumb and forefinger twisting my nipple, pulling it until the pleasure is almost too much. My mouth falls open and my eyes roll back, my lids closing behind them. I really don't think I can take much more of this. "Ha- ha-rder, Embry. Oh God please, faster," I moan as his teeth latch around my nipple.

His hips sort of jackknife against me, losing their pattern when he hears my words. Opening my eyes I look down at him and I smirk when I see his eyes glued on me. They are black and full of lust; the look is so intense that I jerk my own hips up, meeting his forcefully.

"Can't say shit like that. To me," he tells me with a growl and I giggle a little. I can't help myself. I love seeing that I can make him lose control. "I'm fucking- fucking going to lose it. Can't hold on-"

I roll my eyes a little and take his face in my hand, forcing him to look at me. "Cum in me, Embry. I want to feel you cum in me."

It's all I have to say, the only thing I have to do, apparently, to make Embry begin to push and pull harder and faster. I don't realize I'm biting down on my bottom lip until Embry runs his thumb over it, making me release it from between my teeth. His mouth fuses with mine and where his chest rests against my breasts I can feel the vibrations there begin to build. A few more pushes, a few more gasps and whimpers and Embry is saying my name over and over, like a chant.

My body tightens around his hard length, pulling at him, quaking as I begin to cum around him. My toes curl and shimmers of heat shoot up my spine. When I feel Embry start to cum in me, his warm body pushing into me, his hard on like a heart beat as he begins to release, I place kisses along his face and neck. Words are muttered; some nonsensical, others out of love, while we both ride out the waves flowing over our bodies. I don't think my hips are ever going to stop moving against Embry's. Mine keep going with each push and pull, even after he's cum in me, he gently pushes into me, like he doesn't want to be done yet.

Lifting my other leg I wrap it around his waist and dig my heels into his butt, pulling him closer to me so he'll stop moving. His mouth moves to the side of my face, then down my neck, kissing and licking at my skin with little moans and sighs of contentment.

Neither of us speak while our hands roam free over the others body. Embry traces my collar bone with his finger tip then trails down to my breasts. I laugh to myself and shake my head a little. It's always the spot he goes to first. Kissing just below each of my nipples Embry moves from side to side, first left, then right. After that he lightly flicks his tongue at each nipple and there's no way I can suppress the gasp from leaving my mouth. The skin there is tender, probably from the rough stubble covering his chin, but Embry is gentle and loving, even after the aggressive way we've just made love. He has gone back to my Wolf Charming in the blink of an eye.

I take his face in my hands and pull his lips up to mine, kissing him slowly and reverently before pulling back to look into his eyes. "You are too much," I grin and his eyebrows shoot up in question. "Just when I think I've learned all there is to know, you surprise me. You felt so good, slamming into me; taking and giving. I think we need to do that more."

A low, deep purr surfaces and he attacks my mouth with his. Embry tugs my bottom lip into his mouth and bites gently before lifting his head to peer down at me. He's wearing a contended grin on his face and I know he's not as concerned with 'hurting' me as he has been before. "I love fucking you, Lills. I love making love to you. When I'm inside of you I never want it to end."

Sighing contentedly against him I lean up to kiss his lips again before speaking, "I love you." Embry repeats my words then slips out of me and pulls me against his chest. The last thing I remember is one of his hands stroking up and over my hip and stomach then cupping my breast. _Yep, always goes for the boobs._

-0-

"Lillah?"

Glancing up from my desk, I'm surprised to see Rachel walking into my classroom, "Hey Rach, I thought you had already left."

"No, I wanted to finish grading a couple of papers before heading home to Paul." She gives me a wink, "I'm sure you understand this now; when I get home, I don't get anything done, because I just want to be with Paul."

Nodding my head I grin up at her, "I completely understand, but honestly, it's been like that with Embry and me all along." Glancing at my watch, I decide to go ahead a pack up, stifling a yawn as I pack up my books, "I actually feel bad, as busy as we've been these past few weeks, and I've barely been able to keep my eyes open through dinner."

Rachel raises an eyebrow at me as I stand up straight, "Have you taken a pregnancy test?"

"I'm sure it's not that, Rach. Embry would have noticed already." Waving my hand as if to dismiss her idea, I continue, "Besides, I'm sure it's just exhaustion from planning the wedding. I'm actually surprised my mom hasn't called yet. She has a florist willing to deliver the flowers next Wednesday, but she needs everything set up already. That means we have to back the rehearsal up, which means the guys are going to have to set everything up at the crack of dawn on Wednesday."

"That is exactly why I'm here! You need to think about something other than the wedding for a little while. We are going shopping." Rachel's face breaks out into a huge smile.

"Rach, I really don't have time for shopping." I frown, once again looking at my watch. It's only three o'clock, but I was kind of hoping to sneak a nap in before starting dinner.

Rachel loops her arm in mine and pulls me out of my room; I'm barely able to grab my purse before she closes my classroom door behind me. "You have time for this shopping. We need to buy you lingerie for your honeymoon."

"Rachel, I don't know what you and Paul did on your honeymoon, but I'm not planning on wearing any clothes on mine," I whisper to her as we both wave at Principal Green as we exit the building.

Rachel pushes me into the driver's seat of the Acura before sliding into the passenger's seat. Once she slams the door she turn to face me, "I didn't wear many clothes, but every now and then, it was nice to put on some lingerie to tease Paul. Trust me, different lingerie will put Embry in different moods. Something pink and frilly will have him being a sweet, gentle lover. Something black with leather and chains will have him begging you to tie him up and ride him all night long."

I feel the blush creep up my neck at Rachel's words. I've grown accustomed to her candor over these past few months but times like these, she still manages to shock me. She moves her hand, lifting my jaw until my mouth closes. She gives me a smile, knowing she's won, "Start the car, Lillah. I'll call Embry and let him know you are going to be a little late."

-0-

Thursday afternoon I'm walking to the dress shop for my final dress fitting when I pass the lingerie shop Rachel and I visited the other day. My checks are still red when I walk into the dress shop, blushing as I remember all the things Rachel picked out for me. Mom is waiting for me, of course, "Finally! Come on honey, we need to hurry." She looks down at my empty hands, "Where are your shoes?"

"What shoes?"

Mom sighs dramatically, "Your shoes for your wedding day. You need to have those on for her to fit the hem of your dress perfectly, dear."

"I forgot." I whisper, suddenly realizing in all the craziness these last few weeks, I forgot to buy shoes.

"Well, that's ok, I'm sure they have a similar pair here." She points at a shoe display, "Which ones did you buy?"

"No, Mom, I forgot to buy shoes."

Mom spins around, her eyes wide, "Lillah, what do you mean you forgot to buy shoes? Honey, you'll never be able to get any dyed to match your dress now."

Biting my lip I try to figure out what to do. She's right, I won't be able to get shoes dyed to match now, and there just isn't enough time with the holiday next week. "Do I have to wear shoes?"

"Of course you need shoes, dear. If you don't have your shoes on the hem will be all wrong."

"No, I mean do I have to wear shoes at the wedding?" I glance up at her, suddenly excited about this idea.

"No shoes? Honey, you don't want to wear shoes?" Mom looks horrified, which makes me giggle just a little.

"Right. I think I want to walk down the aisle in no shoes. I can have a pair of flats for the reception, but I don't want shoes for the wedding."

Mom shakes her head, "Your father reminded me before I left today this is your wedding, so if you don't want shoes, then I guess no shoes. Now go get changed into your dress."

A smiling woman appears beside me, holding my dress. She waves for me to follow, leading me into a dressing room. I strip down before she helps me into the undergarments I purchased to go with the dress. As she snaps the bustier closed, I notice my breasts seem a little more constricted than I remember them being when I first tried the bustier on. Before I can consider the size of the bustier, the woman helps me into my dress.

I hear her zip it up, but as she nears the top, she makes a tsk'ing sound. Before I know what is happening, she pushes me forward and adjusts my breasts in the bustier. She pulls me back up to standing and I hear the rest of the zipper close.

When I turn to look in the mirror, I'm shocked by my reflection. Not because of the wedding dress, but because of my breasts in my wedding dress. When I tried on the dress last week for everyone, my breasts peeked out a little over the top. Now I have two defined mounds coming out of the top of my dress. Turning to the woman she grins, "I've had this happen a lot. There are darts in the chest, I'll let them out a little. Are you pregnant?"

"No." I say simply, but looking back at the mirror I twist my head a little, examining the breasts that seem to have grown in size over a week. "I don't think I am."

She just smiles at me and gets to work, releasing the darts immediately so my mom won't even know the difference. She makes a few minor changes then declares the dress done, handing the bag containing my dress over to Mom. While I'd love to have it at my house, Embry would be too tempted to sneak a look. Plus, Mom is going to get the dress steamed before they come down on Saturday, then she's hiding the dress at Emily's house.

Mom and I hug briefly before we go our separate ways. I drive home quietly, my mind racing in a million different directions. Just like the woman at the dress shop, my first thought would be that I'm pregnant, but since Embry hasn't said anything, I really don't think I am. However, it is realistic that as I gain weight back, it would come back in my breasts. I didn't notice them going down in size when I lost weight, but I'm sure this is some weird cosmic joke on me, or maybe a treat for Embry. Either way about it, I'm guessing my recent weight gain is to be blamed for the increase in the size of my breasts.

_But what if I am pregnant?_

I feel slightly nauseous just thinking about it. Embry will be ecstatic, I think, but I'm not sure how I feel. Even though it was my idea to start trying, I've not really thought about how I will feel if I'm pregnant because I've been so focused on the fact that I'm not yet. Happy, of course. Nervous, for sure. _Scared shitless is more like it._ But more than anything, I know I will be excited, because I can't wait to start building a family with Embry.

As I cross the line into Forks I try to calm myself down, speaking over and over in the car, "You aren't. You can't be. Embry hasn't said anything."

Even as I'm making dinner these words flash through my mind. My heart gets to pounding so hard my breasts jiggle under my t-shirt, which gets me thinking about the whole thing all over again. Needing a distraction I decide to start a load of laundry. After I separate the clothes, I fill a basket and head back into the kitchen, stirring the rice and checking the chicken.

"Lillah? Baby, I'm home!" I hear Embry call through the house as the front door closes. He had planned on starting dinner for me since he knew I had the dress fitting this afternoon, but he texted me earlier explaining that Jacob had something come up; Ness and a dance rehearsal is the only thing I remember from his earlier messages.

Calling out to him, directing him toward the kitchen I turn back to the laundry I'm putting into the washer. I hadn't realized how long it'd been since I'd washed until I couldn't find anything that matched this morning. I hear Embry's large feet tromping through the house and it comforts me, putting a smile on my face. I know mostly he makes noise so I know where he's at; oddly enough, for a large guy, he's incredibly quiet and stealth.

Warm hands wrap around my waist and pull me back against his chest. I release the pair of pants I'd been scrubbing and they fall into the washer tub with a quiet swish. "Hi," I whisper as Embry gently moves my hair to the side and places his lips against my neck.

"Mmm, hi, beautiful girl," he sighs into my skin. I hear him inhale deeply once, then twice. It's not uncommon so I don't think anything of it. He's been sniffing me for a while now; I feel like he's smelling the dirty laundry. That thought makes me giggle a little but I stop when Embry's arms tighten around me.

"Lills, did you do something different? New perfume? New soap or lotion?"

Shaking my head I wiggle a little so Embry releases me enough for me to turn and face him. I look up at him thoughtfully, going over my morning routine in my head as my heart begins pounding again. "I don't think so. There's nothing specific that I recall. Why do you ask?"

Embry's face doesn't give anything away. No expression at all, even in his eyes, which is weird. I haven't seen him closed off this way since- well, when I first met him. That realization sends a shiver of fear up my spine.

A slow smirk lifts the corner of his mouth and my brows knit together in confusion. Embry pulls me back into him and places his nose against my skin. His tongue flicks out but only the tip, as if he's tasting something. My body stiffens when he looks back down at me, his eyes wide with shock.

"I think- Baby, I think you might be- we might be... be, be pregnant," the last words that leave Embry's mouth are breathless and a little squeaky. My mouth goes dry as I process his words. I can't swallow so I try to clear my throat, but I can't make a sound as his words sink into my brain slowly.

When I'm finally able to speak it's a whisper, "What?"

"I don't know... you smell different. Fuck, you _taste_ different. I thought maybe it was perfume or lotion or something. But if you haven't-" he's rambling now. If I were to guess, I would think he's trying to rationalize and not get his hopes up, which is the same thing I'm doing in my head.

"Embry, we don't know-"

"I'll go to the store. Get a test. Should we call Kim?" I can see the excited panic in his eyes now. The need to know for sure is strong but I don't want to bother Kim, not when I want Embry and me to be the first to know.

"Ok. Ok ok, you go to the store. I'll- finish making dinner and- and drink lots of water?" The last part of my statement comes out as a question because I'm not sure what to do with myself. I wasn't expecting this today. With what happened at the dress shop earlier, I had decided that if it happened, I would be thrilled, but if it didn't, I wouldn't put too much pressure on either of us. For Embry to come home and drop this bomb on me, I'm shell shocked.

Embry begins to pull away from me but I don't let go of his arms. My mind is racing and the only thing I can focus on right now is him. He moves back into my embrace and pulls me hard against him, holding me tight to him. I feel his mouth begin to move along my neck, kissing softly until he nears my mouth. Turning my head a little I meet his lips with my own. We begin kissing slowly and it turns more forceful quickly until Embry is pressing his hips into mine.

He's hard against me and it takes my breath away because I'm not expecting that so soon. I've felt him react to my body swiftly but not quite like this. Our kisses become more heated and he's pressing me back against the washer, grinding our hips together, making me pant into his mouth.

When he pulls back suddenly I'm surprised. "I can't do that here. I can't rut like some pig, against the washer while you might be carrying my baby."

Ignorning the last part of his statement, I focus on holding onto him, giving into the desire he has built inside of me. I give him a blank stare then roll my eyes, "Embry, I really _really_ want you to fuck me on top of the washer."

Embry's eyes go wide and I notice his breathing picks up but he still steps back. I pout my bottom lip out, thinking it will bring him back to me. It doesn't work, he stands strong. "You're- killing me, Lillah."

I shrug my shoulders because I don't see what the big deal is, I want him, he wants me. Sure, I'm trying to come to grips with the idea that I might actually be pregnant, but my focus has managed to switch to him, not his suspicions of us being pregnant. In the back of my mind I know I still don't want to get my hopes up.

"I'm horny. You make me horny. Your voice, your scent, the feeling of the heat of your body against mine," I admit to him, thinking it will get him to give in. It doesn't.

Nostrils flaring, Embry steps back a little and grabs his keys from the hook next to the back door. "I'll be back soon. And then I'll fuck you against the washer, on top of it, backwards and forwards. I fucking promise."

Before I can speak, he's out the door and I sink into a chair in the kitchen. I don't know what's come over me and now that he's gone, I don't know what to do. My mind rushes back to the idea of my being pregnant and I know I need to figure out something to do to keep occupied while he's gone.

-0-

I'm scrubbing the bathtub when I hear the front door open and close. Embry doesn't call out to me so after rinsing my hands I make my way into the kitchen. His back is turned to me and I say his name quietly, my nerves still a little on edge, despite spending the last hour cleaning every surface I can reach just to distract myself. When he turns around I see a bruise on his cheek. "What happened?" I ask, running over to him and taking the bags from his hands. Grabbing his hands in mine I realize his knuckles are bloodied. "Oh my God! Embry-"

"I'm ok, Lillah. It's ok. Just a little run in with," he pauses for a second then growls, "Carter."

"CARTER? Where did you see him? How did this happen? Did he jump you?" Words are tumbling out of my mouth faster than I can even think about them. Even though Embry can change into a wolf, I know that Carter is sneaky and will do anything to get back at someone.

Embry actually throws his head back and laughs at that. Pulling me into his arms he clears his throat before explaining, "I was in the store and he came up to me." Gasping, I try to pull away to look up at him but he won't allow it. "Fucker," he whispers almost to himself. "He wouldn't shut up; just kept on trying to goad me through the store. He followed me out to the parking lot and he said some things- about you. So I punched his ass."

Finally he lets me pull away enough to look at his hands and I speak aloud my realization, "That was more than just a punch, Embry." The blood on his skin has dried but I can see a little bruising that has begun to heal already. "I can't believe this. Can't he just let us be? I don't understand why he keeps harassing us. He's with someone else now." I'm beginning to get worked up, thinking about him laying a hand on Embry. I wish I'd been there myself. I would have loved to punch him; although it's doubtful Embry would have allowed me near him.

I tug Embry's hand and pull him along behind me, leading him to our bedroom, where I make him sit on the bed and go grab a first aid kit. He sits quietly while I clean his knuckles and check his face. I see a grin growing on his face while I frown down at the small cut on his lip. "Babe, I'm ok. What little damage he did is already healing. Please don't be upset," Embry urges. Pulling my eyes up to meet his I can't fight the tears any longer. They spill over onto my cheeks and he takes my face in his hands, kissing me softly.

"Lillah, I swear, I'm fine. Don't get yourself worked up over that asshole. Please, baby."

Nodding my head I nuzzle my face into his neck, inhaling the spicy scent that always surrounds him. I hate that he's being put through this; I just want him to be happy and worry free now. He cuddles me in his arms for a while before I finally sit up, smiling at him, relieved that he's no worse for wear.

"Do you want to take a test now?" Embry asks me abruptly. I'm surprised that he's still focused on that and I look into his eyes, trying to see if he's hesitant now that the shock has worn off. He looks excited and anticipatory and that's when I realize that he's brought the bag of tests with him.

After I nod my head in agreement Embry repositions us on the bed and begins pulling the pregnancy tests from the bag. We read the directions for each one, since he bought enough of them for not only me but every other girl in town. There are at least three of every brand the store had. When I lift a questioning eye brown at Embry he just shrugs sheepishly and says, "I wasn't sure which brand was best. And then I thought, what if the one test I bought in that brand was faulty. So-"

"So you decided just to be on the safe side, you'd buy a dozen?" I finish for him with a grin on my face. He grins at me and I pull him in for a kiss. "I really love you, Embry Call. You are the most amazing man. Don't ever doubt that." I place one more kiss on his lips before I gather my tests and go into the bathroom, closing the door behind me.

I make quick work of peeing on sticks and placing tests on the bathroom vanity, lining up the ones I've used. When I leave the bathroom Embry is propped against the head board of the bed, waiting on me. He looks relaxed but I notice that his hands are clenched together and his feet are bouncing back and forth. The fluttering in my stomach hasn't let up since he left to make his run to the store; it relieves me a little to know he's just as nervous.

Climbing on to the bed with him, I curl next to his side and look at the watch I rarely see him wear. He flips the TV on and settles on a movie that we've both watched hundreds of times. It's a distraction, for sure, but my mind isn't completely engaged. I'm startled when the alarm on Embry's watch beeps. I hadn't realized he'd set it. I lift my head from his chest and we stare at one another. He jumps up just as I do, both of us nearly racing to the bathroom.

We stand side by side, his arm around my waist while I stare down at the sticks lined up on the marble sink top. Neither of us speaks, maybe because we are scared of being the one that breaks the silence; I don't know. Finally I manage to swallow around the lump in my throat and I turn to look up at Embry. I'm not expecting what I see; his eyes are already on me and the only way I can describe them is 'shining'. There is a huge smile on his face. "Em- I'm... we're," that's all I can say because he's knocking the breath out of me as he pulls me into his arms.

I can't speak because I can't breathe. The truth hits me; _I'm pregnant_. Embry and I are going to have a baby. Our own family. A beautiful baby that maybe has his skin tone and his beautiful silky hair. Gasping into Embry's chest I say his name over and over. He pulls me away from his chest, looking into my face closely, in fear I believe. There's no way for me to know what he's up to until he's lifting me off the floor, gently cradling me against him as he carries me into the bedroom. Embry allows me to drop to my feet when he reaches the bed. The back of my knees hit the edge of the mattress but I remain standing.

To my surprise Embry drops down to his knees, kneeling in front of me, his hands on my hips. His face is turned up, looking at me with a dreamy look on his face. "We're gonna have a baby, Lillah." I can only nod my head in agreement because he's releasing the button on my jeans and pulling the zipper down. Embry opens them, exposing my skin and pulling them over my hips just a little. After that is taken care of, he moves to my shirt, pushing the end up and over my tummy. His warm hands flutter across my stomach just before his lips replace them.

I watch Embry closely; he has a look of reverence on his face as he traces his fingers along my skin. "Hi, I'm your dad," he whispers close to my abdomen; at that, I'm a sobbing mess. Embry leaps to his feet and pulls me into his arms. "Lillah, baby, are you ok?"

The word "baby" makes me cry even harder even though I try to calm myself, I hiccup against his shoulder. I can tell by the sound of his voice that he's beginning to panic. Sniffling and giggling at the same time I pull back from Embry's tight hug. "I'm ok, Embry, I promise. It's just, I'm overwhelmed and maybe a little hormonal," I say the last part trying to lighten the mood. Climbing onto the bed I wait for Embry to follow me. He leans back against the pillows and I prop myself against his chest before taking his hands in mine.

Our fingers twist and thread together then I move them to my stomach, placing them over my exposed skin. "We're going to have a baby," I whisper. "You're going to be an amazing daddy, Embry." I continue while he kisses the side of my neck, then my shoulder. He loosens his grip on one of my hands and begins to draw circles on my skin.

I am shocked and elated and a million other emotions I can't even put my finger on. When I climbed out of bed this morning I never dreamed my day would end in this way.

"You are going to be a beautiful mother, Lills. I can't wait to watch our baby grow inside of you; to feel it move under my hands." Embry's voice is full of a love I've never known before him.

We lay with one another for an immeasurable amount of time, stroking our joined hands over the place our child is growing as we talk and dream and love one another. I feel blessed with this life I've been given; my heart soars and my body radiates a happiness I haven't ever felt. This is perfection and amazingness all rolled into one.

Some time later, Embry and I move from our cocoon; he goes to rescue our forgotten dinner while I clean up the bathroom, throwing out boxes and pregnancy tests before I join him. He managed to save the chicken, turning it into sandwiches with some left over soup. It's simple, but the best dinner I've ever had, just because of how happy I am. We clean up together, Embry or I touching my stomach often; sometimes he stops me so he can lean down and whisper words too low for me to hear. Every time he does this it makes tears spring to my eyes and a smile stretch across my face.

Once dinner and the dishes are put away Embry lifts me from my feet and carries me back to our bed. I giggle when I recall that I have witnessed Jared doing the same to Kim. Embry undresses me slowly, not leaving a bit of my skin untouched as he reveals my body. We make love, slowly and sweetly for the rest of the night. This is our own way of celebrating this new life we have created together; me and the man I love more than life itself. Now we are being joined by the most amazing blessing either of us could imagine. I couldn't ask for anything more than this.

-0-

**A/N: **Sigh. We'll be the two girls huddled together in the corner bawling our eyes out. One more chapter (we think, unless we just get too damn wordy and have to split it into two) then LC is done. But don't worry, Embry & Lillah will still be around, popping up in our follow-up stories. Make sure you have us on author alert. In addition to follow-up stories, we have a Jake/Ness AH story plus a short (ish) angst story in the works. You definitely don't want to miss!


	40. Chapter 40 Say You Will

**Chapter 40 "Say You Will"**

**Disclaimer:** Let it be said that we love SM for giving us such great characters to play with and to watch grow. We owe her. Unfortunately, she's got all the dough from this little saga and we've got nothing. They're hers. We just like to play.

**A/N:** What we've ALL been waiting for. A little ass kicking. A little wedding. A lot of swooning.

**LILLAH'S WEDDING GOWN**, can be found on our Tumblr (http:/stupidleeches[dot]tumblr[dot]com) or our website (http:/stupidleeches[dot]com). 

**EPOV**

_Forever can never be long enough for me_  
_Feel like I've had long enough with you_  
_Forget the world now, we won't let them see_  
_But there's one thing left to do_

_Now that the weight has lifted_  
_Love has surely shifted my way_

_Marry me today and every day_  
"Marry Me" - Train

_She's pregnant. She's really pregnant. I'm going to be a father. I'm gonna be a_Dad_._

_Oh shit._

I close the back door behind me and run for the woods; I'm too anxious, I have to release this excess energy. I plan to come back for my truck after I've had a little time to run. My thoughts are racing just as quickly as my feet are hitting against the ground. I'm elated and nervous all rolled into one. I run a few circuits around La Push, giving me a little time to think. I'm not phased too long before I decide to get back to my truck so I can go to the store and hurry back to Lillah.

My mind is still in racing as I drive to the grocery store. Once there I make quick work of finding the aisle with pregnancy tests, condoms and the female- stuff. Picking up one of the brands of tests I read the back of the box. Looking at all the options I know I'm out of my league here; I have no idea which one is the best. Tapping the box against the palm of my hand I begin pacing up and down the aisle, looking at the choices in front of me. _How is it possible they have so many?_ I mean, one pregnancy test is the same as another, right? I stop pacing and stare at them again.

Making a snap decision I nod my head and grab one of every test I see, throwing them in my basket before walking down the aisle. Better to let her choose which one she wants._I don't know shit about women products._The voice in my head laughs at me. _You are about to get a crash course._

I pause at the end of the aisle, suddenly struck with a thought. _What if the one I grabbed is faulty?_ I quickly turn back around a grab a few extra tests, just in case. I feel like an idiot, but I need for Lillah to know she's pregnant, and I can't have a faulty test telling her she isn't when I know she is.

Quickly grabbing a few other things I walk to the front of the store. While I stand in the check-out line I grab peanut M&M's, thinking they will make Lillah smile. _Peanut M&M's definitely make me smile, and horny as hell._I shake my head to derail it from that train of thought.

"Well well well, if it isn't the Little Indian."

Hearing the voice of the biggest asshole in the world makes me want to growl, but I manage to hold it in as I turn to face him. When I see him, I can't help but smirk because he looks like shit; his hair is sticking up every which way and his face is covered with patches of a scraggly beard. _I will never understand what the fuck Lillah ever saw in this jerk._ He must have really done a good job of hiding his true colors from her; she is neither naive nor lacking common sense.

"What are you doing in Forks, Carter?"

He gives me a shit eating grin, "Just visiting my fiancée's family."

"Sir? Excuse me?" The cashier catches my attention and I turn to place my basket on the conveyor belt. I do my best to ignore him, hoping he'll just go the fuck away.

_No such luck._ I see his hand shoot out and pick up one of the pregnancy tests.

"Huh.' Results in three minutes.' I know you aren't buying this for Lillah. She'd never have use for a pregnancy test," he taunts and I tighten my jaw, trying to control myself. I know it would not be good if I punched this guy in the middle of the store.

Managing to only growl lowly, I snatch the test from his hand and pay for my purchases. Assisting the cashier with bagging, I grab the bags before walking out of the store quickly. I don't care what that fucker has to say, I just want to get home to Lillah. _My woman. My imprintee. My baby mama._ I grin to myself, knowing she would hate to be called a 'baby mama'.

I'm halfway to my truck when I hear Carter running up behind me.

"Since I'm sure that isn't hers, I'm guessing you have something on the side? Maybe that hot little cousin of hers?"

Turning quickly I growl at him, "I would NEVER cheat on Lillah, unlike some people, she is all I will ever need." I don't wait for his response, turning back toward my truck.

"I find it hard to believe you don't have someone else to take care of your needs; I'm sure she's still a prude. What did you have to do to pry her legs apart? Alcohol? No, I doubt that worked. I've been there and it didn't help, she was still cold as ice."

I keep walking, knowing I shouldn't react to him, because that is exactly what he wants. Unfortunately, he keeps talking, "Did you use drugs to finally get some from her? I considered it at one point, but she really wasn't worth it. I could get my needs taken care of by another, more experienced, women."

My fists curl around the bags, ready to punch him, but I stay focused on getting home to Lillah. The fucker runs faster, his words coming out in pants, "I bet when you stuck your dick in her, that snatch was like a vice grip."

_That's it._ No fucking way will he _ever_ talk about Lillah that way, not if I have anything to say or do about it. Without a second thought I whirl on him, dropping the bags to the asphalt. I raise my fist before he can even blink or realize what is coming. I hit the no-neck-mother-fucking-loser square in the jaw. He is close enough for me to see the shock in his eyes and I grin as I pull my fist back, then nail him in the gut.

I'll give the bastard one thing, he at least tries to take a swing at me once, but my wolf instincts and reflexes take over. I easily catch his hand before it connects with any part of my body other than my palm. I use my free hand to deck the other side of his jaw as his pansy ass starts to drop to the ground. Hovering over him I spit out, "You. Ever. Speak that way about her again, I will END you. You will regret the day you came to Forks. Take your sorry, no good, ass back to Seattle and don't ever step foot in my town again. Got me?"

"Fucking Little Indian! You broke my jaw."

I shrug and roll my eyes at his theatrics then grab my grocery bags from the ground. Seeing the broken eggs I growl, "And you made me break the eggs. Now I have to go back into the store, meaning I'm going to be late getting back home to Lillah. I hate being late."

I place my purchases in the truck then turn back to the store. It takes everything in me not to kick him while he's still down but I keep walking. After just a few steps I hear him yell at me, "I'm so going to sue your ass over this. I'll take you for everything you're worth. I'm sure it's not much, but I'll take it all." _Obviously, his jaw is not broken._ _How disappointing._

"Feel free to sue me. It's your word against mine. You talked shit about my woman and then you landed on my fist. I'm sure my future in-laws would be happy to defend me against you," I smirk watching him wipe the blood from his lip.

"Carolyn and William would never defend your ass," the pussy has managed to stand up again, but he's hunched over.

"Pretty sure they would. William is Quileute, just like me, and Carolyn loves me. She'll love me even more once she finds out I'm the father of her first grandbaby. Just stay the hell away from us."

"Fine, I'll leave you alone. I'm sure it won't take long for Lillah to beg me to come rescue her from living in poverty," the fucker actually has the nerve to give me a smirk.

"Trust me, that won't ever happen. I can, and will, give her anything she wants. She doesn't want you, move on with your fiancée; you two seem like a perfect couple."

I turn around, smiling the whole way back into the store. I can still hear him outside bitching up a storm, but I don't care.

By the time I walk back outside he's gone, thankfully. I get in my truck and drive home.

I try to walk into the house as quietly as possible, wanting to clean myself up before Lillah sees me. Unfortunately, I'm not quiet enough and I hear her walking up behind me just as I move to the kitchen sink. My attempts to assure her that I'm fine don't work and after I give her a brief explanation of what happened, she pulls me into the bedroom to clean up the cuts and bruises that are already healing. As good as it felt to finally put Carter in his place, I'm worried she is upset that I punched him.

When I see tears falling onto her cheeks, I quickly pull her to me, kissing her as softly as I can. Once she stops crying, I place her on my lap, just holding her for a few minutes. I take a deep breath, trying to figure out this new scent that is mixed with her now. I can still smell her, intoxicating like always, but wrapped up in that scent is something else; it's subtle, no one else would ever know, but I know my girl is different now.

Since I hadn't noticed the change in her scent, I tried not to get my hopes up, even though I've seen the signs the last couple of days. Every night this week she has been fighting to stay awake past dinner, but I assumed it was just exhaustion from planning the wedding. The other day she looked like she was going to throw up when I offered to make enchiladas for dinner; my first thought was she must not have liked it as much as she originally claimed, but she said it just didn't sound appealing to her. She attacked me each night as soon as I walked in the door; barely making it into the living room before she had my clothes off. Of course, the best change has been her tits; I first noticed the difference two nights ago when she begged me to fuck her over the sofa again. When I reached for her tits there was just- more of her in my hands. I nearly lost my shit as soon as I realized, but managed to hold myself together until she was satisfied.

Now holding her here, I need for her to know for sure, like I do. I don't need these silly tests to tell me she's pregnant, but I know she does. I can feel myself starting to get excited again when I ask her if she wants to take the tests now. When I show her the bag of tests I brought with me into the bedroom I can see her relax, smiling at my inability to make a decision. Before I know it, she's telling me she loves me then grabbing a few tests and running into the bathroom. I grab one of the tests she left behind to check how long we have to wait once she's done.

I clear the remaining tests off the bed, then grab my watch, setting the alarm for five minutes, just in case it takes longer for the tests she took. I turn on the TV and do my best to look relaxed before she comes out. I'm pretty sure she doesn't fall for it, grinning at me as she climbs into the bed. We both have our eyes on the TV but neither of us is paying attention. I feel her jump in my arms when the alarm on my watch beeps. We stare at one another for a brief second then both run for the bathroom.

I hold on to her as she looks down at the results; my eyes don't move from her, not needing to know what those things say. I'm quiet, letting her absorb what is completely obvious to me. Her eyes are wide with shock; I know the excitement in mine is clear for her to see.

"Em- I'm... we're," she still looks shocked even as the words finally come out of her mouth. I'm too excited to wait another moment, pulling her into my arms and holding her tight against my chest. My heart expands with happiness and I swear it feels like my chest may burst . Lillah buries her face into my chest and begins to say my name over and over. She's gasping in air and I can tell she's struggling to calm herself down.

Hearing her react this way scares me. _Was I wrong thinking that she wanted this as much as I did? Did she only agree to keep trying because she thought it was what I wanted?_ I pull her away from me and look down at her face, her grey eyes are huge with shock but she doesn't look upset as I feared. Her cheeks are flushed and her eyes are glistening with unshed tears. Without thinking I lean down and lift her, one arm hooked under her knees and the other around her back.

The urge to hold her is strong but I want her to be comfortable so I carry her into the bedroom. I let her feet drop to the floor when we are next to the bed then I back her up until her legs hit the mattress. My eyes don't leave her face, trying to decipher her reaction, hoping she's ok. Lillah doesn't sit but I run my hands up and down her back, up into her hair then to her neck until I can cradle her beautiful face. Her skin is pale, like all the blood in her body has fallen from her usually pink tinted cheeks. My heart starts pounding with worry until her eyes flick up to mine. The concern I felt before slowly dissipates when I see the color come rushing back to her face as I see joy spark in her eyes.

Before I even realize I'm moving, I drop to my knees in front of Lillah. My hands on her hips and I look up before whispering quietly to her. She doesn't say anything in return but I keep moving my hands until they are unbuttoning her jeans. I need to touch her skin but not in a sexual way, I just need to be closer, to- to touch our baby. That thought takes me breath away. _A baby._ Lillah and I and a baby. Exposing her skin to my eyes, pushing her shirt up over her abdomen, makes my heart surge into my throat. I spread the palm of my hand over her skin, gently running my fingers over her stomach, wishing I could feel _something_ in there but knowing it's too soon.

Nothing could stop me from placing my lips against her stomach, kissing it gently all while knowing our baby is growing and thriving in its cozy spot within the woman I love. I can't remain quiet and I begin speaking to the baby in there. It's insane to me that there is this small being growing inside of her and I had something to do with it. It startles me when Lillah begins sobbing and my head jerks up to look at her. I jump to my feet and pull her into my arms, worried that I've somehow upset her.

She cuddles into me, hiccupping into my shoulder in between her heavy tears. My breathing picks up because I'm honestly scared by her reaction now. My arms tighten around her body but she begins to pull away when her crying quiets. I don't realize I'm holding my breath until she speaks, assuring me that she's ok, even trying to joke a little. A weak smile plays across my lips as she moves to climb onto the bed and I follow her, leaning back against the pillows and taking her into my arms.

We lounge against the headboard, talking quietly and kissing one another gently while my hands play across her skin. I don't really know what to say to her now. Even though I knew by her scent and the changes in her body, it's still a lot to take in, especially knowing for sure, like we do at this moment. In my mind I begin to see her as she has been in my dreams, both awake and asleep, with a belly full of our baby and her face glowing with happiness. She is beautiful beyond words. It all feels unreal now that it's finally here. I can't help the thrill that comes over me at the flashes that go through my head.

I don't even realize I'm speaking until she squeezes my hand ; lifting my head a little I kiss the crown of her head, inhaling the sweet scent of her shampoo before resting against the pillows again. My hand moves, still connected with Lillah's until it's resting on her abdomen. I don't ever want to move from this spot. I want to lay here with her, loving her this way for forever.

However, when I hear her stomach rumble, I can't stay there a moment longer. Now I have to make sure she and our baby are taken care of, including making sure they are fed. Once we are done eating, we clean up then I carry her back to our bed. It's hard for me to keep my hands off of her on a normal day. On this one in particular, I just need to feel her against me; her silky skin exposed to my hands and lips. I remove her clothes slowly and gently, making sure I appreciate every bit of her sweet skin I can. It's my job to make sure she knows how loved she is; how much she's needed and wanted.

We make love, her back against my chest while I'm buried deep in her from behind. The new angle this position provides is almost more than I can take, but fuck if it's not amazing. I keep her moving with one hand on her hip while the other roams her lush body. When I know she is close I move my hand down to find her clit, rubbing it with light fingers until she's purring and begging me to make her cum. I do my best to oblige her, picking up speed both with my dick and my hand until I think I might lose my shit before she finally comes on me.

I'm reluctant to pull out of her but I need to see her face, kiss her lips once her breathing calms. Tangling our legs together I trace an invisible line over her collar bone, down over her breast, teasing the tip of her nipple and then continuing to her stomach. We fall asleep wrapped up together this way, my hand spread across her skin, just below her navel, protecting our Halona as we drift off into oblivion.

-0-

I'm nervous the next night when I see William's Mercedes in the driveway. As excited as I am that we are down to just six days until our wedding, Lillah's parents staying here at the house with us during that time worries me. We aren't planning on telling her parents we are pregnant until we get back from our honeymoon, but I'm worried they'll figure it out while staying with us.

Taking in huge gulps of the cool night air, I walk slowly up the front porch steps, opening the door with as much noise as possible so they know I'm here. The door shuts behind me just as Lillah runs to greet me. I happily pull her tight against me, my fingers pushing her hair back as my lips find hers. She sinks into my chest as my free arm circles her waist to support her. When we separate my other hand moves to cup her face, whispering softly, "Hi, baby. How's it going?"

She closes her eyes, taking slow, deep breaths as she leans her head into my palm, "Fine."

When she doesn't say anything more, I start to get nervous. Still whispering, I brush my thumb against her lips to get her attention, "What?"

"Mom insisted on making dinner," she sighs, opening her eyes to look at me.

"Ok, that doesn't sound so bad."

"She's making enchiladas." Lillah squishes her nose, exhaling through her mouth like she's trying not to be sick. Remembering her reaction to my suggestion for enchiladas the other night, I'm guessing she's not feeling so hot right now. _Which isn't good with her parents here._

"What do you need me to do?" Ideas race through my brain of ways we can cover up her being sick. "I could say you've come down with a twenty-four-hour stomach bug."

She smiles softly, moving to rest her head against my chest, "I don't think we need to do anything that drastic. I've been drinking my ginger ale and nibbling on the crackers when Mom isn't looking. I think I'll be able to make it through dinner."

"Alright. Everything else going ok with them?" I ask as I run my fingers through her hair.

"So far. They are all settled up in Angela's old room. Mom is planning to have me join her to finish all the running around tomorrow, so it'll be just you and Daddy here. Maybe you can take him down to the reservation, let him talk to the elders?"

"I can definitely do that. Is there anything you need me to do?" My hands have moved down her spine, massaging gently as they move.

She sighs against my chest, whispering, "Just hold on to me through this next week and I'll be good."

"Then I have news that will make you very happy. Sam and Jacob told me to go ahead and take next week off, along with the following week. No work or patrols for two weeks."

Lillah's head jerks up and there is a huge smile on her face, "Really?"

"Really. I'll do my best not to let go of you for the next two weeks," I grin down at her as she squeals with excitement, jumping up and down before pulling my lips to hers. Her kiss conveys her excitement and I get lost in her easily. We don't separate until I hear a throat clearing behind Lillah. Instincts kick in and I step in front of her, holding her tight against my back so she and the baby are protected.

William raises an eyebrow then speaks, "While I don't like walking in to find you two making out like teenagers, I'm glad to see you protect her like that, son. Carolyn asked me to let you both know dinner is ready." He turns without another word, heading back into the kitchen.

"Oh he's going to kill me," I sigh as I turn back to Lillah.

She just shakes her head, giggling as she pulls me into the kitchen. I get our drinks, making sure to fill her glass of ginger ale to overflowing, along with her typical glass of water. When I sit down, she scoots over until her chair is touching mine, her thigh against mine. My hand snakes around her, pulling her against my chest as I eat with the other hand. Keeping an eye on her throughout the meal, checking for any signs that she isn't feeling good. She takes a few small bites of the enchilada, then pushes it aside to focus on the rice and salad. Reaching across to her plate, I cut off a big bite of her enchilada and stuff it in my mouth. Her giggling grabs her parents' attention, but when they ask what is going on, she shakes her head, "Nothing, Embry is just being silly. The enchilada is delicious, Mom, thanks."

I clean up the dishes as is now my habit, while Lillah and her parents relax in the living room. While I can catch some of the words of the conversation, I try not to listen in to what they are saying, giving them as much privacy as I can.

When I make my way to the living room, they bring me into the conversation, explaining they were discussing a few of the more bizarre law questions William and Carolyn have received in recent weeks. During a pause in the conversation, Carolyn clears her throat, like she's hesitant to speak. Her eyes dart over to William, who gives her a questioning look. My arms tighten around Lillah as I feel her heartbeat speed up. _Something is going on._

When Carolyn finally speaks, she turns to me, which is surprising, "I received a phone call this morning from one of my firm's clients. He likes to think he's a VIP, so he demands to speak to me on a regular basis. Typically my assistant manages his calls, but today she sent him through to my cell phone."

I glance down at Lillah and she shrugs, obviously unsure what her mom is talking about either. I don't say anything, but turn back to Carolyn when she starts speaking again.

"The reason my assistant patched him through was because he specifically asked if I was Lillah Hunter's mother." Carolyn raises an eyebrow, glancing over at Lillah.

"Me? Why would one of your clients ask about me?" My fingers gently press into Lillah's skin through her clothes, trying to relax her. Touching her also helps to keep me focused on her and not the sudden dread I feel.

"Because his son is your ex, Carter." My heart sinks as I realize what her phone conversation was about. _Carter is making good on his threat to sue me._

I glance down at Lillah, trying to apologize with my eyes but she shakes her head, whispering, "No, Embry, this isn't your fault."

"Mr. Baldwin wanted to discuss the, and I quote here, 'brutal attack on his son' by my daughter's 'brute of a fiancée'." I hear Carolyn's words but I can't take my eyes off of Lillah now. I knew better than to punch him, but I couldn't take him talking about her that way any longer. He just wouldn't take a hint, so I had to knock him over the head with the truth. Lillah is, and always will be, mine.

My head jerks up when I hear William laughing. Glancing over at Carolyn, I can see her trying to hold back her laughter. Turning to Lillah, I can see she's just as confused by their reaction as I am. Lillah speaks for both of us, "What's so funny? Is Mr. Baldwin going to sue Embry? Because that wasn't his fault. Carter has been harassing us for weeks."

Carolyn is no longer able to control her laughter at Lillah's words. I hold her tight to me as I wait for them to explain what is so damn funny about all this.

Finally Carolyn chokes out, "Don't worry you two, we know he provoked you. I reminded Mr. Baldwin that there are witnesses that saw Carter threaten you at the restaurant in Port Angeles, but no one saw Embry attack his son in Forks yesterday." Carolyn glances over at William and nods.

"Embry, do you mind if I see your hands?" William's voice is deep and sure, like he knows what to expect. I reluctantly remove my hands from Lillah and hold them out for William to inspect. He glances at Carolyn and smirks, "I told you, not a scratch on him. Baldwin doesn't have a leg to stand on. There is no physical evidence that Embry attacked Carter, and no witnesses. It's his word against Embry's, and no judge in his right mind would blame Embry for attacking his fiancée's ex-boyfriend."

"Agreed." Carolyn nods her head then smiles at Lillah and me, "Carter has been causing trouble in Seattle for years, picking fights all over town. Typically Mr. Baldwin requests that my firm cover up any 'incidents' that Carter gets himself into."

"Really?" Lillah sounds shocked, but I'm not. Trust in the little pansy ass to pick a fight with someone bigger then hide behind his daddy's money and lawyers. _I hate him._

Carolyn nods then a sarcastic smile grows across her face, "Carter has been showing off his new little toy, Jessica, all over Seattle, but from what I heard, his parents aren't happy with his selection. He definitely took a step down with that one. His father had our firm draw up a pre-nup, but I heard Jessica is refusing to sign it. I'm guessing she's using him just as much as he's using her."

Lillah shakes her head but doesn't say anything more. I glance up at Carolyn, just wanting to confirm, "Do you think he'll sue me?"

"He can try," Carolyn shrugs her shoulders.

William interjects before Carolyn can say any more, "Don't worry, he won't get very far. We have your back on this one. After the way he treated our daughter, I'm glad someone finally knocked him on his ass."

I glance up at him and we both nod once, each acknowledging the other without words that we will protect Lillah from that asshole no matter what. When I turn back to Carolyn she is smiling again, "Enough of that, let's talk about the wedding. Embry, when are you picking up your tux?"

"Wednesday morning, the tux shop just held the one I used for Rachel and Paul's wedding, so they didn't have to special order it again."

Carolyn nods then launches into a full conversation with Lillah, planning out their day tomorrow. When Lillah is no longer able to hold her head up, I turn to Carolyn, "I think I need to get her to bed. It's been a long week."

"Right! I'm sorry sweetheart. We'll get started again in the morning." Hugs are exchanged and I mention going out the reservation tomorrow to William. His grin is huge, especially when I offer meeting up with the elders. Once they head upstairs, I easily scoop Lillah up in my arms, carrying her to our bedroom. We are quiet as we go through our routines to get ready for bed.

When Lillah slides in beside me, I can feel her heart is pounding. "What, baby?"

"Nothing, I just wish Carter would leave us alone," she sighs.

Growling, I speak as quietly as possible, "He will leave us alone or he'll get more of my fists running into his face. I don't care if he sues, I through playing nice with him."

She doesn't say anything more, just curls up against my chest. I'm just about to reach over and turn off the light when she whispers, "I'd kill for a caramel sundae right about now."

My chest rumbles with laughter. She glances up at me, her eyes wide with shock. I kiss her softly then speak softly, "No one needs to die, I'll go make you a caramel sundae now."

"One more reason why I love you so much," she giggles, kissing me briefly before I slide out of bed. I move to the kitchen, making quick work of creating the dessert for her. However, when I walk back into the bedroom, there is no doubt this time; Lillah is sound asleep. I return the dessert to the freezer for another day, then climb into bed. As soon as I slide under the covers, her body finds mine and we are tangled up together, just like always.

-0-

William and I spend most of Saturday at Billy's house. Sue brings lunch over just about the time Quil shows up with his grandfather and Claire. Claire comes bouncing up to me, excited that she gets to wear her "pretty dress" again in our wedding. I know Lillah worked out all the details with Emily about having Claire and Eli in the wedding, and I'm glad to hear she didn't ask them to buy new clothes for the kids just for our wedding. Sue pulls me aside before we leave, wanting to make sure it's ok if she brings Charlie with her to the wedding. I don't understand why she feels the need to ask this, since we all like Charlie. I know Jacob has suggested Sue bring him to our monthly bonfires, but so far, she has declined.

When William and I return to the house, Carolyn and Lillah are waiting for us. The evening is peaceful, but I can tell Lillah is exhausted, though she does finally manage to eat her caramel sundae; she even shares a few bites with me. I can feel Carolyn's eyes on us throughout the night, but I decide to ignore it.

As soon as Lillah's head hits the pillow, she's out. My dick protests and I consider taking a shower to ease some of the pain. While it's been a few days since we've made love, I can't imagine touching myself; I'm spoiled by her touch now. I can't even be upset with her, I know she wants me as much as I want her, but she's exhausted because of our wedding and carrying my baby. _It's my fault._ As excited as I am to meet our baby, I hate seeing Lillah have to go through this. I wish I could do more for her, but all I can do is hope it gets easier for her soon and hold her until it does.

I fall asleep with my hard dick pressed against her ass but when I wake up the next morning, she is no longer beside me. I open my eyes to find Lillah exploring my body, her mouth hovering over my cock. Her eyes glance up to mine and she licks her lips, whispering a good morning before she takes me in her hot mouth. _Fucking fuck!_ I've been so focused on being in her pussy now that I can be, I've forgotten how fucking good her mouth feels on me. She works me until I can't hold back any longer, giving her a warning just before I cum. I fight to keep my eyes open, to watch her take all of me, and she rewards me by locking her eyes with mine as she swallows everything I give her.

She climbs up my chest and I can feel my dick getting hard again as she slides her wet pussy over my shaft. "I'm sorry I feel asleep last night. Mmmmm," she moans as she pushes her hands against my chest for leverage, sliding her body over me. "I wanted you so much, but I couldn't stay awake. How do you feel about morning sex?"

"If I get to wake up like this every morning, I fucking _love_ morning sex," I growl, pushing myself up as I pull her against my chest. Adjusting her hips, I easily slide into her, both of us groaning at the feel. Our pace is slow, enjoying this connection we have. We also try to stay quiet, since her parents are upstairs. Once we both find our release, she curls up against my chest, both of us panting our love to the other.

When we finally manage to get out of bed, we decide to share a shower. Unable to keep my hands off of her, our shower turns into another round, this time with her back pressed against the wall as I support her by her hips. Her arms are locked around my neck, her legs wrapped around my waist as I push into her; I can feel her nipples pebble against my chest at the contrast between the heat from my body and the water and the cool of the tiles. Her nails scratching down my back as the fingers of her other hand tug my hair roughly are my undoing. For the third time in less than an hour, she manages to make me cum, her pussy milking everything out of me as she rides her own orgasm out.

We finish the shower, but only after I wash her from head to toe and make her scream my name one last time while my hand clamps over her mouth. We dress slowly, laughing as we both tease the other, but don't take it any further. When we arrive in the kitchen, Carolyn is sipping coffee while William scans the newspaper. He lifts an eye brow at us, but doesn't say anything. I make breakfast as Carolyn and Lillah discuss still more details about the wedding. _Who knew it took so much just to get married?_ I keep an eye on her all day, never letting her stray far from me.

Sam, Emily, Claire and Eli stop by that afternoon and we spend the evening together. All of the women laugh when they find William, Sam, Eli and I snuck off to watch the Seahawks football game, but soon join us as we scream at the TV.

After everyone leaves, Lillah and I snuggle in bed as she dozes off. Monday morning our alarm is going off and she jumps out of bed, rushing to get dressed. School is closed for the week for Thanksgiving, but that doesn't mean Lillah is getting a break. The real preparation for the wedding is in full swing and the days fly by in a blur.

-0-

Before I know it, it's Wednesday morning and the wedding is almost here. I crawl out of bed, kissing Lillah goodbye before heading to the back door. I dropped all the equipment off yesterday, which means I can phase and run over to the beach this morning. I haven't phased since her parents showed up, and I feel tightness in my body, like my skin is unable to handle the pressure of holding the wolf in. I take a quick glance back at the house to make sure no one is watching then phase as soon as I hit the woods. Relief washes over me as I'm able to return to this form. Seth and Leah are still patrolling since it's so early, but I can also sense the other guys when they phase into their wolf forms. I show each of them the location for the wedding in their mind before pointing my body in in the same direction.

When I reach the driftwood tree where I brought Lillah nearly two months ago, I can't help but be proud of myself for selecting this location. She knows we are getting married on the beach, but I haven't told her where yet. Emily will be bringing her, William, and Carolyn over later today for the rehearsal, but I'm meeting them at the shop then showing them the way. I plan to carry Lillah just like I did that first day, back to our spot.

The guys and I make quick work of setting everything up. We kept most everything intact from Paul and Rachel's wedding, but there are a few changes that we need to make. Billy's platform is positioned beside the driftwood and the seating area is set up on top of the plywood we've pulled out, but the "aisle" will remain uncovered. Lillah told me the other day she wanted the aisle to just be the sand. When I cocked an eyebrow, asking about getting sand in her shoes, she just giggled and told me not to worry.

Once everything is put together, Sam, Jacob, Paul and I head to the tux shop to pick up our orders. The bag feels lighter than before and when I rummage through it I realize there are no shoes included. When I ask the girl behind the counter she informs me that the shoes were removed from the order last week by a Mrs. Uley.

Turning to Sam he shrugs his shoulders but calls up Emily, just in case. Once he hangs up, he shakes his head, laughing, "She says yes, she made the change and that we are not to ask any more questions, just hurry back to meet the florist."

Sam drops me off at the shop and I don't have to wait long for the florist van to show up. I escort them down to the location and stand back, letting them set up the flowers as Lillah and her mother requested. Once they are done, I head over to Sam and Emily's place to clean up for the rehearsal. When I walk in the house an amazing smell wafts from the kitchen. Letting my nose lead me, I find food set out ready to go for the rehearsal dinner. I'm just reaching a finger out to take a small taste of the mashed potatoes when a hand clamps down on my shoulder. Turning quickly I see a smiling Sam behind me, "I wouldn't do that, Emily and Lillah will kill you. Go get ready."

Grumbling, I head upstairs to shower and change. We are soon in Sam's Suburban, with Eli happily giggling at Claire's antics as Sam drives us to the shop. We take the kids to the location before I go back to the shop parking lot, seeing Emily's minivan pull up just as I step out of the woods. Lillah's feet don't even touch the ground, I move to scoop her up in my arms as soon as she opens the door. She protests, of course, but I ignore her. I lead the way for everyone, even though we've laid out a path all the way to the wedding site. Since it's already getting dark, I'm sure that makes it hard for them to see, so I try to go slower than I normally would to allow them to keep up.

As soon as I approach the small clearing, Lillah gasps, "Embry! You didn't!" I don't have to say anything, she turns in my arms, dropping kisses all over my face, "You amazing man! How did you know? This is perfect! I love you, so much!"

I laugh with her, then slowly set her down when she finally pulls herself together. Once she removes her shoes, she explains the significance of our location to her parents. I can see a tear forming in Carolyn's eyes as Lillah speaks. Once she's done, Carolyn moves to me, hugging me tight, "Lillah is right, you are an amazing man, Embry. Thank you for giving her this."

I don't know what to say, but I'm saved from speaking by Billy, Jacob and Ness approaching, followed by Angela and Ben, and Paul, carrying Rachel. When Carolyn pulls back from me, I can just hear her whisper to Lillah, "These boys sure do like to carry their wives, huh?"

Lillah grins up at me then whispers back to her mom, "Something like that, Mom."

Jacob helps Billy up on his platform as Sam, Paul and I light the torches and heaters we've place around the seating area. Emily starts giving instructions on what will happen during the wedding, placing myself, Sam, Jacob, and Paul beside Billy. As we stand there, she directs everyone else on where they need to be during the ceremony. I don't really listen, my eyes naturally falling to Lillah. She's wearing a dress that I think she picked out just to torture me. When I held her before I could tell it was a soft material, but standing up, it seems to enhance every part of her to perfection. The color, which matches her ring perfectly, highlights her creamy skin as well as brings out the gold in her hair. While she has worn lower cut tops before, the top is cut to show off her beautiful breasts, the swells just peeking out. Dragging my eyes away from her fabulous tits I'm nearly fall to my knees when I see so much of her amazing thighs below the bottom of the dress.

Forcing myself to look back up at her, I can see she's enjoying watching me devour her with my eyes. I just see her mouth "I love you" before Emily pulls her back away from me. We go through a couple of practice runs and I'm surprised to see Emily carrying Eli as she walks down the aisle, but when Lillah makes it to me she explains that the wagon wouldn't exactly work in the sand, so Emily's going to carry him.

Once Emily decides we have practiced enough, she invites everyone back to the house for dinner. Sam helps me extinguish the torches and turn off the heaters before we make our way to his Suburban.

When we walk into the house, Lillah is waiting for me by the door. I pull her to me, kissing the top of her head while she finishes talking to Emily about the schedule for tomorrow. Emily suggests Lillah stay the night at her house, but I shut that idea down quickly, "I'd like to get some sleep before the wedding."

Lillah smiles but agrees with me, promising to be back at Emily's early in the morning.

Just as we are all sitting down at the table Carolyn gasps, covering her mouth before turning to Lillah, a look of worry on her face. "Lillah, what happens if it rains tomorrow?"

"The trees are pretty thick there, Mom. It would have to be raining pretty heavy for anything to hit us. For the reception we have tents set up in the backyard, so that will be fine." Lillah shrugs, unconcerned, but Carolyn is still worried.

"It might be covered, but what if it's raining cats and dogs tomorrow, Lillah?"

The entire table goes quiet. Just as I think no one will say anything, Sam smirks, speaking too low for Carolyn to hear, but all the guys hear his words perfectly, "Is she calling us dogs?"

All the guys, including Eli, start laughing, but quickly calm down when the girls silence us. I glance over at Carolyn, who looks completely confused, explaining, "That's a little bit of an inside joke among this group. I checked the weather earlier, it's supposed to be cold, but no rain tomorrow."

"Oh," Carolyn still looks a little surprised as she sighs, "good. That's good to hear."

Lillah leans over and whispers to her mom, "Its fine, Mom, just a silly joke among the guys. They don't like to be called dogs."

"Who would ever call any of these boys dogs?" Carolyn says a little louder than I think she meant to. This sets the entire table laughing, even Lillah tucks her head against my chest trying not to let her mom see her laughing. Carolyn blushes but laughs too, "Oh, you know you are all handsome boys."

"Including me?" William leans over, grinning at Carolyn.

Her laugh sounds just like Lillah's when she responds, "No honey, you are a handsome _man_."

Lillah has a weird look on her face. When I lift my eyebrows she leans over and whispers, "I think my mom is flirting with Daddy. That's kind of gross."

"Maybe, but if she hadn't flirted with him, I wouldn't have you beside me now," I lean closer so only she can hear me. "Do you think our daughter will be saying the same thing about us one day?"

She is quiet, but her face turns a soft pink. Finally she smiles up at me, her lips brushing mine as she speaks, "I love you, so much, Embry."

Before I can respond, Angela clinks her glass, starting the round of toasts. Emily fills everyone's glasses, but I see her nod her head at Lillah before she fills her glass and I know she knows. After a few toasts, the dinner breaks up, since things will begin early in the morning.

-0-

Lillah has already left but there is a list left for me on my bedside table of things I need to do before I leave for the wedding. Kim is coming over to help finish up the food that still needs to cook today, while Jared, Jacob, and Paul are helping me to finish setting up the backyard for the reception.

We manage to take care of the backyard in record time, which is good because I have other things to work on. Moving to the bedroom I throw a few clothes in a suitcase and set it beside Lillah's. She wouldn't let me look at what she packed, but I'm guessing it isn't much, since she has just one suitcase for our week-long honeymoon. I call the hotel to confirm our reservations as well as to ask for a late check-in, since I have a feeling we won't get out of here early and it's a four hour drive to the hotel. I also book a couples massage for tomorrow afternoon, making sure they know about Lillah's pregnancy. After all that is taken care of, I finally get ready. It feels weird not to put on shoes, but if Lillah wants me barefoot, I'm happy to accommodate.

When I finally make it to the driftwood tree, everything is set up and ready to go. This is a little disturbing to me, because I have nothing to do but wait now. I'm not nervous, just anxious to be done with all this; I'm ready to call Lillah my wife. Finally, guests start arriving and Quil shows them to their seats. This truly is the small wedding Lillah wanted, with only three rows of chairs set up on each side of the aisle. Most of the audience is pack members and their imprintees, but a few of Lillah's friends are also in attendance.

Sam elbows me, showing me his phone. It's a text from Emily. _We're here. It's time._

My heart is now pounding so hard I can barely hear the soft music coming from the speakers Sam set up this morning. I watch as Lillah's mother is escorted in by Quil, taking one of the empty seats in the front row. Next to walk into the clearing is Claire, who grins and waves as she walks barefoot up to the front, then sits beside Quil. Emily approaches, holding Eli and everyone "awe's". As she steps forward, Eli is holding the pillow with our rings tied on, which he gives to Billy.

"My boy is so smart!" Sam gushes as Emily hands Eli to Sue before taking her place opposite me.

I don't even realize Angela is walking behind Emily until I see her step into my line of vision, taking her place behind Emily. When I turn back to look for Lillah, I'm a little disappointed to see Rachel approaching, but I know that means it's almost time.

The music stops then starts back up but I can't pay attention to the song, because suddenly, Lillah's there. I try to take in her dress, commit it to memory, but all I see is my beautiful Lillah walking toward me. I can just barely see her eyes through her veil, and what I see sets my heart pounding even faster; she's smiling from ear to ear. I was expecting tears; I was prepared for tears, but seeing her so happy makes my heart want to break free of my chest.

Managing to scan down, I force myself to remain in place when I see her dress; strapless with the top of her breasts overflowing just a little with my mom's necklace resting between her breasts. The dress is fitted down her entire body, hugging her hips, until it flares out at her feet. Little bits of sand are being kicked up as she walks, which makes me smile. As she gets closer I can see the dress is made out of some sort of lace with a matching satiny-sash around the middle, showing off her curves. Her hair is pulled back from her face, but curls softly fall around her bare shoulders.

When William pauses in front of me, I just barely hear Billy ask, "Who gives this woman away?"

"Her mother and I do," William's voice is thick as he lifts the veil from Lillah's face, giving her a kiss on the cheek before he takes her hand and places it in mine. Before walking away, he speaks softly, "She might be your wife after this, but she will always be my little girl."

My head drops down to our joined hands and I give the slightest of nods before William steps back. When I glance up at Lillah, she has the most beautiful look on her face. Her eyes are soft, watching every move I make. Her makeup is light today; subtle, but highlighting her eyes, cheekbones, and those lips that I can't get enough of. I'm dying to kiss her, but I know I can't do that until Billy says so.

Billy is speaking, but I can't focus on his words, my mind locked on Lillah. When he speaks my name, I jerk my head up; Billy tells us it's time to read our vows. Since nothing for Lillah and I has been normal so far, we wanted to write our own.

I grip her hand tight as I wait for her to speak. She takes a couple of deep breaths, then starts, but nothing comes out. Clearing her throat, she tries again.

"Embry, I fell in love with you the moment you picked me up. You saw me when no one else was paying attention. You brought me here to this place and it was like I was finally waking up from a dream. I felt so connected to you that first moment I laid eyes on you. The more I got to know you I started falling fast and hard. In the process of falling in love with you, though, you also made me learn to love myself. You made me feel alive, beautiful, and loved. I never knew it could be this way. You are my life now, my everything, and I promise to love you every day for the rest of my life."

Lillah lifts her hand, pressing it to my cheek as she finishes speaking. When I rest my head against her hand I feel her wipe at my eye. I'm shocked to feel moisture as her thumb brushes my skin.

No one speaks a word until Billy clears his throat, telling me it's time to read my vows; the words I memorized weeks ago. The words that have been building up since the day I met her.

"Lillah, two months ago I brought you here to this driftwood tree, thinking I was protecting you but I ended up needing you to protect me. I wasn't looking for love when you came into my life, but now I can't live without you. I fought falling in love with you, but even as I tried to push you away, you loved me unconditionally. You opened your heart to me and I realized I was missing something in my life. That something was the love that I never knew I could feel for one person. I can't remember how I lived before you, but I never want to spend another day without you by my side. I promise to love and protect you all of my life. I am honored to be standing here before you and our family and friends, marrying my best friend, my soul mate."

As I finish speaking, the tears I expected to see before are now shining in Lillah's eyes; she's blinking rapidly, trying to keep them at bay. Just as she did for me, I cup her face, my thumb gently brushing away the moisture and she closes her eyes when our skin makes contact.

Billy starts speaking again, asking Lillah to repeat the words he says as he hands her my ring. Her voice is shaky as she repeats the simple words that bind us together in marriage. Once she finishes, she pushes the ring onto my left ring finger. It slides into place perfectly.

I clasp her hand in mine as Billy asks me to repeat the same words to Lillah, handing me her ring. I say the words slowly, speaking as clearly as possible. I push her ring onto her finger but I refuse to let go of her hand now. Billy finally starts wrapping up, but it feels like forever until he speaks the words I'm dying to hear.

"Embry, you may kiss your bride."

The entire pack gives the wolf call just as I drop my lips down to Lillah's. Not wanting to embarrass her, I keep the kiss light, but she surprises me; she pulls herself closer to my body, deepening the kiss. I manage to pull back, but only after I hear Sam laughing as he speaks, "Man, save some for the honeymoon."

I don't hesitate, leaning down and pulling Lillah into my arms, my lips returning to hers as I carry my new wife down the aisle. Something lands on my face and I realize everyone is blowing bubbles at us. Lillah is giggling as I carry her out. When we stop beside the waiting limo that Carolyn insisted we needed, I whisper to Lillah, "That's how we should have left the driftwood tree two months ago."

Once I set her inside, I slide in after her. She climbs into my lap, dropping kisses all over my face, "Better late than never, husband." The sound of her calling me that does unbelievable things to me.

The driver informs us that he will be taking a couple of laps around the reservation before heading to the house; this way the guests have time to arrive before we make our grand entrance.

Lillah shifts in my lap, grabbing my attention by softly speaking my name. "Embry?"

"Yes, my darling wife?"

Her face lights up and she leans forward, speaking softly just for me to hear, "I want to make out."

"Make out?" I ask, lifting my eyebrows in question as I push the button to lift the privacy glass. There's no way I will say no, and she knows this.

Lillah nods and giggles, "Uh huh. Like two horny teenagers."

"I think we already surpassed that stage," I whisper, as my fingers slide across the lace covering her stomach. While she won't be showing for a couple of months, every other part of her body screams at me, reminding me that our baby is growing inside her right now. I have to admit, her hormones might be making her horny but knowing she has my baby in her belly has me in much the same condition.

She doesn't say anything, but her hands cup my cheeks turning my face to look her directly in the eyes. The look on her face is my undoing. "Just make out?"

Lillah doesn't answer, her lips moving to my neck, sucking the skin into her mouth. After a few moments she grins at me, "Maybe a little more than make out. You are mine now, and I'm going to mark you."

"You already marked me." I speak softly, lifting both of my hands to show my wedding band on my left ring finger, and my friendship ring on my right ring finger.

She lifts her hands, interlocking her fingers with mine before leaning forward, kissing me softly, "We're really married?"

"We're really married."

She squeals happily and we spend the remainder of the limo ride doing as she asked, making out like two horny teenagers; boob groping and dry humping and all.

-0-

**A/N:** Soooo we got wordy. ARE YOU SHOCKED BY THIS? We've split this chapter into two parts because it was over 15,000 words. The wedding reception and honeymoon will be the (real) final chapter.


	41. Chapter 41 Just the Way You Are

**Chapter 41 "Just the Way you Are"**

**Disclaimer: **We don't own anything except Lillah, Carter and Eli. It's all SM. We just borrow her toys. Any mistakes are our own.

**A/N:** In case you missed LILLAH'S WEDDING GOWN, you can check it out on our Tumblr, which is sometimes NSFW "not safe for work" (stupidleeches[dot]tumblr[dot]com) or our website (stupidleeches[dot]com).

**EPOV**

_When I see your face_  
_There's not a thing that I would change_  
_Cause you're amazing_  
_Just the way you are_  
_And when you smile_  
_The whole world stops and stares for awhile_  
_Cause girl you're amazing_  
_Just the way you are_

Just the Way you Are - Bruno Mars

The limo stops in front of the house a short time later, _too short._ I don't want to share my wife just yet, but I know I have to. The week long honeymoon ahead of us is the carrot I dangle in front of myself. _Survive the reception then you get her to yourself for a week straight._

We both adjust our clothes, just in case anyone is waiting for us in the front yard, and then I slide out easily. Instead of offering my hand, I reach in, scooping her up in my arms again.

"Embry, that really isn't necessary, we're just walking into the house."

My smile is easy, despite the fact that I don't want to share her, "its tradition, carrying the bride over the threshold."

"Now you want traditional?" Lillah giggles as I carry her up the front porch.

"Alright, you caught me. I really just like holding you in my arms." I don't set her down once we are inside, I head for the bathroom, since our feet are still covered in sand.

Lillah sighs softly when I set her down , pulling me back into her arms when I move to the sink, "I really like when you hold me in your arms. That's when I feel safest." My arms automatically go around her waist and I pull her against me tightly while my mouth attacks the crook of her neck. I inhale deeply and sigh against her skin. She smells sweet and I can't help myself when I taste her with the tip of my tongue.

A soft knock on the bathroom door breaks the moment. Emily peeks her head in, "Everyone dressed? Hurry up you two, we are all dying to see the happy couple."

Lillah gives me a soft kiss on the lips before releasing me. I make quick work of rinsing our feet then grab shoes for both of us. Lillah giggles when I pull on my black riding boots, but they are my most comfortable shoes, when I have to wear shoes.

Emily is waiting at the bedroom door for us, bouncing on the balls of her feet. As we walk out, she hugs us both, "Congratulations! I'm so happy for both of you. Now come on, the boys are getting a little feisty, I think they are hungry."

Emily and Lillah share a conspiratorial wink before Emily leads us out. I pull Lillah into my arms before she can take a step, but this time she leans into my chest, her beautiful new scent teasing my nose. I still don't understand how just a whiff of her can have such an impact on me, but in two months, I've grown accustomed to walking around with a semi whenever she is near.

The party is already going, but stops as soon as we walk out to the backyard. Everyone starts cheering, and we are swept into the crowd. I manage to hold on to Lillah's hand, but we are pulled into two separate conversations; while the guys ask me about the honeymoon plans, I can hear Sue introducing Lillah and Charlie. Once it seems we have talked to every single person in attendance, Emily finally shows us where to sit. There is a table set up for just us, facing the rest of the wedding guests.

Emily grabs everyone's attention and opens the floor for toasts. Way too many people stand up to speak for my comfort. I was expecting Sam and Angela, but they are shuffled to the back of the crowd. To my amazement, William is up first, and I try not to cringe when he clears his throat to speak.

"I have to admit that when my wife first told me Lillah was seeing someone new I was leery. Not because it was Embry, but it's in a father's nature to worry about his only child; his baby girl," he begins and I squeeze Lillah's hand, thinking about our own daughter and how I would feel if I were in his shoes. "Carolyn met Embry before I did and she came home raving about how good he was for our Lillah," he stops and looks down at Carolyn and she smiles up at him and nods.

"I trust my wife and daughter more than anyone else on this earth but I had to see him, to meet him, for myself. I needed to look into his eyes and see the truth. I'm proud to say, after the shock of hearing them talk about getting married wore off," he grins and the crowd laughs, "I knew Embry wasn't just another young man trying to take advantage of Lillah. It was evident he loves her; by the way he looked at her, rarely pulling his gaze from her face, and how he found a way to always be close to her. I noticed how much like me he is- how strong he is and how protective he is of Lillah."

"He's a good man, an honest man with values, strength and a great capacity to love. I'm pleased that it's Lillah he's chosen to have stand next to him, to share his life with. Congratulations to my beautiful daughter and new son-in-law," he finishes, lifting his glass higher and looking at the two of us with a smile on his face.

To say I'm shocked by William's words is a complete understatement. I hadn't realized he saw me in such a way. Lillah leans into my side and kisses my shoulder as I turn my face and kiss the top of her head. Her hand finds mine and she clutches it, gripping my fingers tightly. When she lifts her head to look at me her eyes are shinning with tears. She's beautiful and I love her more than anything; I hope both her parents realize this.

Turning my head to look back at William I nod in thanks because I can't bring myself to actually vocalize what's in my head. I hope later I can thank him for the woman he raised and molded, making her the most precious gift I could have ever asked for.

William moves to hand the microphone to Carolyn, but she is so emotional she waves her hand at him. Unable to say anything, she instead raises her glass in salute to both of us before turning into William's waiting arms.

William hands the microphone over to Jacob, who is the first of the guys waiting to speak, but Paul, Quil, Jared, and Seth are all bouncing on their toes to follow him. Thankfully, the guys behave themselves for the most part, all talking about how annoying I was when I was fighting falling in love with Lillah and how they _knew_ I would give in eventually. I can't help but scoff when Jacob says he had to give me advice on making Lillah fall in love with me. These guys are so full of it- but they are my best friends and I wouldn't trade them for anything.

Once Seth is done speaking, he gives the microphone to a waiting Emily. "I met Lillah the same day Embry did, but I had heard of her already. Rachel couldn't stop talking about this new friend of hers. When Rachel mentioned in passing that her new friend was going to be visiting the reservation to discuss our history with her father, none of us knew what a life changing day that would be. A lot has happened since then, but here we are, two months later, celebrating their love and welcoming Lillah into our family, officially." Emily swipes at her eyes before she raises her glass, "Congratulations to Embry and my new sister, Lillah."

Lillah beams at Emily as she runs up and hugs her tight. I'm happy she and Lillah have become close, especially now that I have Sam as a brother. I smile as I watch Emily run back to her table where Sue is holding Eli.

When I look back up, I see Rachel is next. Having survived the guys, I'm hopeful she will behave, but I still have no idea what she might say. I have no doubt she'll be respectful with Lillah's parents here, but I'm sure she'll throw in some sarcasm. Before Rachel can speak, Emily steps up with Claire. I'm not sure what's going on until Rachel laughs, handing the microphone to the little girl.

I tense up a little; as much as I adore Claire, she can be a wild card, especially given her age. "Thank you Uncle Bry for marrying Aunt Lillah. I _told_ you she loved you and wanted you to kiss her. Just remember, you need to have a little girl like me, so we can be best friends and play Barbie's up in the 'pretty room'."

Everyone laughs but when I glance down at Lillah I can see her cheeks are flaming. I pull her face against my chest, attempting to let her calm down before her parents realize just how right Claire's words are. "They have no idea how accurate she is," I can't help myself and let my hand drop down to graze her stomach, just below the table, "She'll be so excited when she finds out."

Lillah nods her head and looks up at me, a smile on her face that makes her eyes sparkle. I can tell she's bursting with excitement and I'm not sure how long either of us can hold out before we tell _someone._

Rachel takes the microphone from Claire, speaking over the laughter, "Congratulations, Embry and Lillah. I think that you should name that little girl Claire mentioned after me, since I am the one that brought you two together." Paul shouts out his disagreement and those of us that know the true story, laugh. "Fine, _Paul_ and I brought you together, but you never would have been on the reservation if I hadn't forced you to become my friend, Lillah. Aren't you glad you listened to me and gave in? To my best friend and her husband!"

Lillah laughs, shaking her head at Rachel's antics, but both Lillah and I nod in agreement. We are glad she set the whole thing in motion. Rachel turns, grinning as she hands the microphone to Leah. I'm a little scared of what Leah might say, but she surprises me, "Lillah, congratulations, you married a great guy. Embry has been a good friend to me for many years, and I knew you were someone special the moment he mentioned you. You changed him, but it's a good change, he's way less cranky now with you around," she winks as we laugh.

Leah, smiling, turns to Angela. Angela looks hesitant as she takes the microphone Leah offers. She waits until Leah has moved back to her seat before speaking. "Lillah, you've been more than just a cousin to me, you're more like a sister. As such, I need to tell you; you're a terrible liar." Lillah's eyes are wide as she glances at Angela, but I have to laugh, because she is completely right. Lillah narrows her eyes at me then giggles, shaking her head before turning back to Angela. "You were acting weird one day, and when I mentioned it seemed like you were having boy troubles, you said it wasn't a guy."

Lillah blushes bright red, apparently remembering the day Angela is speaking of, but I'm completely confused until Angela continues. "That night, I met your 'not a guy' when he came to return the jacket you had left behind at the diner earlier that day."

Realizing the day Angela is talking about, I can't contain my laughter as I look down at Lillah's bright red cheeks. Leaning down, I brush my lips against the hottest part of her face, whispering, "I was already a goner that day." Lifting my right hand, I wave it in front of her face before sliding my fingers over her neck, "I grabbed this ring-slash-friendship-bracelet out of the cereal box that morning because I wanted to give it to you. To make you smile." Shaking my head, I remember what an asshole I was to her that night, "I'm sorry-."

Lillah's hand against my lips cuts me off, "Shhhh. None of that. It's all in the past, we are here now. I love you."

When Lillah pulls back from my lips, Angela is grinning at the two of us. She doesn't stop smiling as she finishes up, looking directly at Lillah, "I guess you didn't technically lie, Embry isn't a 'guy', but I knew he was definitely different, and different was what you needed. I've never seen you this happy before and I know Embry is the reason why. Congratulations to both of you, I wish you much love and happiness today and for the rest of your lives."

Once the applause calms down, Angela turns, giving the microphone to the last person standing up, Sam. "To my brother and his wife," he raises his glass higher, "Congratulations! I'm so happy for the both of you. You're both so lucky to have each other. I wish you all the happiness this life can provide."

I can feel Lillah's tears against my shirt as I raise my glass, mouthing "Thank you" to my brother. He gives a short nod then returns to sit down with Emily, who cuddles into him, joining their hands.

The music starts playing again while the food is being put out on tables at the very edge of the backyard. I watch as William cuts the massive turkey before turning back to my bride, "I forgot to mention, you are breathtaking." Wiggling my eyebrows, I glance down at her breasts, "I especially like how those are peeking out the top."

"They aren't supposed to be doing that." Lillah leans over and whispers, "The woman at the shop let the dress out last week at my final fitting."

"I'm not complaining," I whisper back to her.

She shakes her head at me then leans over again, "My mom noticed this morning. I'm pretty sure she's figured out that I'm pregnant."

Before I can respond, Emily brings two heaping plates of food over to us. She also conveniently refills Lillah's glass with something non-alcoholic while everyone lines up for their food.

Once the food is finished, Emily moves us over to the cake. As Lillah takes the knife from Emily, I ask for the microphone. She hands it over with a shrug.

"I just wanted to say thank you to everyone for spending your Thanksgiving celebrating our wedding. Lillah and I are so happy you could be here to share this with us. We both have a lot to be thankful for this year and we couldn't think of a better time to celebrate than today." I hand the microphone back to Emily before turning to Lillah, "I love you, Mrs. Call, and I'm so glad you came into my life."

"I love you, too, Embry. I'm thankful everyday that you are mine." she kisses me briefly, making sure not to get too close with the knife.

We cut the cake, each carefully offering the other a bite. I groan when I realize it's Emily's chocolate cake, grabbing Lillah's hand to lick off the crumbs. She laughs, but takes one last lick of my finger when I offer it to her. Emily then takes Lillah from me to toss her bouquet. I can't help laughing when I see Sue dragging Leah out to the dance floor. Leah hangs to the back of the floor, but when Lillah tosses her flowers, they fly right into Leah's hands. The look of surprise on her face causes all of us to laugh and I can't help but feel bad for any guy that Leah imprints on. _If they thought I fought the imprint, wait until it happens for her._

Once that is done, Lillah moves to have a dance with her father. I watch her sway with him until the song ends and I know it's time for our first dance as husband and wife.

The music slowly changes to the song we selected to dance to, _Marry Me_ by Train. After listening to the lyrics I knew it was perfect, and I whisper the words to Lillah as the music plays. My arms draw her closer, thrilled that I can now call her my wife, my partner.

When our song ends Lillah lifts her head and I can see the love and happiness there; along with the tears I expected before. The dance floor fills but we remain in our little cocoon until her father taps my shoulder. I move to dance with Carolyn, and she hugs me tight when I pull her into my arms.

"You two look so happy. I can't express how much joy it brings to me to see Lillah with someone that loves her as much as you do. She's a very lucky woman."

I smile down at Carolyn, "I'm the lucky one. I never expected this. I'd thought maybe there wasn't someone out there for me; someone that is such a perfect match for me. She's the one and I can't tell you how thankful I am for that."

Carolyn's eyes shimmer with unshed tears and she nods, "You are both lucky. I don't want to put a damper on the day by bringing him up but- Carter, he never treated her with an ounce of the love you have in the short time you've been together. I believe that's why her father and I haven't really been overly anxious about everything happening so fast. Sometimes you just know when you've met the right person. I have no doubts that you are that man for her. I'm proud to have you join our family, Embry."

"Thank you for everything. I can't tell you how much that means to me. Lillah and I are very happy. She's my life." We don't speak for the rest of the song, instead dancing in silence while both of our sets of eyes are drawn to watch Lillah and William. He looks maybe a little sad, a small grin on his face as he looks down at his daughter. William is speaking to her and whatever he's saying has a smile on my Lillah's face. It's clear to me how much both her parents adore her but I can't imagine what it would be like to be her father, letting her go; entrusting her to another man.

Carolyn's voice breaks through my thoughts and my body goes stiff when I hear her words, "I have to ask you something." She's smiling when I look down at her but I have a sinking feeling that she's about to knock me on my ass.

"Of course, you are free to ask me anything."

Carolyn glances over at William and Lillah, who are laughing; her feet are on top of his and they are spinning around the dance floor. She smiles then looks back at me, "Is she pregnant?"

I hadn't expected her to ask me that, not here and now. I can't lie to her now that she's asking me point blank. I respect and like her too much to do that. I wish Lillah was here with me so she could share the moment with her mother. I know she wanted to be the one to tell her and rightfully so. Carolyn and I have stopped moving and to my surprise, Lillah taps her mom's shoulder. _She must have noticed something was going on._ "Mom, can I have my husband back now?"

Glancing up, I see William is over talking with Quil, so I lean down and speak softly for Lillah, "Your mom wants to know if we are pregnant."

Lillah's face goes white as she looks up at me then back over to her mom. She doesn't say anything at first, but nods her head up and down a couple of times. I pull Lillah into my arms, holding her against my chest as she stands in front of me and we face Carolyn together.

"We're pregnant," Lillah announces and Carolyn gasps as she pulls us both into a hug. It's not the reaction I was expecting but it is definitely what I hoped for.

When Carolyn finally releases us she whispers, "How far?"

Lillah shakes her head, "I don't know yet. I took a drug store test just a week ago. Embry and I haven't been- you know, for long; so I can't be too far. I have a doctor's appointment on December eighth, so hopefully I'll find out then," I drop a kiss on Lillah's cheek and feel the heat there. She's embarrassed but I know it's because she's discussing something personal with her mom, not because she's ashamed.

"Mom, I promise, this isn't why we wanted to get married so fast."

Carolyn waves her hand dismissively, "I know you didn't. Is that why you hadn't told me yet? Were you afraid I would be upset? You two already act like your married; the wedding was just a formality."

Before Lillah can speak I begin, "We were both so excited once we admitted our feelings to each other. We started discussing our future right away; talking about kids and everything. This baby was planned and is most definitely wanted, I promise, this wasn't some "oops" kind of thing. I would have married her today regardless." Lillah elbows me, blushing at my words, but Carolyn laughs and waves a hand at me; like she's saying "you don't owe me an explanation."

"So you're saying you were trying to get my daughter pregnant?" she says after my words soak in.

"Um, well," I look down at Lillah and swallow nervously. "Yes?"

"Just- please don't tell Daddy yet. I want to have solid information before we tell him." Lillah whispers, checking over her shoulder to make sure William is still occupied. Her father is definitely the hurtle that I knew we would have to jump together. His reaction to me knocking up his little girl has been something I've worried about from the beginning.

"Of course, darling. I've been trying to get him ready. He even laughed when that adorable little Claire mentioned you two having a baby." She hugs Lillah again, "My baby is pregnant! I can't believe I'm going to be a grandmother." Carolyn's hand shoots out like she's going to touch Lillah's stomach but she stops herself. Probably fearing someone would notice.

"So you are ok with this?" Lillah asks, her voice only a little anxious.

"Of course I'm ok with it. I'm more than just 'ok' with it. You and Embry will be phenomenal parents and I know any child you bring into this world will be loved like no other. I'm so excited!"

"Excited about what?" William asks as he wraps his arms around Carolyn.

Carolyn grins up at him, "About having Embry as my son now. He's such a good man."

Thankfully Carolyn covered up for us, as I pulled Lillah off to dance some more before William can question us further.

We stay later than I planned, dancing and laughing with our friends and family, but by ten o'clock, Lillah is starting to fall asleep in my arms. I offer to let her change but she shakes her head, whispering just for me, "No, I want you to take off my wedding dress and make love to me when we get wherever you are taking me." _How can I argue with that?_

Before we say our goodbye's to everyone we make sure Carolyn and William have everything they might need after we leave. Lillah and Carolyn wander off into the kitchen together and I hang back in the living room with William, giving them a few minutes alone.

"I wanted to say thank you for your toast today, it meant a lot to both of us. You don't have anything to worry about, sir. I promise to take care of her and guard her with my life. She'll never want for anything and I'll do my damnedest to keep her happy for the rest of our lives," I say to him, facing him across the coffee table. I need for him to know this about me that I understand the sacrifice he is making and that I won't let him down.

"I know, Embry. My mind isn't bothered by you two getting married. Don't ever think that. She's lucky to have you. It's rare to find something like the two of you have. Thank you for taking care of her. I wouldn't want it to be anyone else."

We do the awkward handshake, half hug thing that men do and I decide it's time for Lillah and I to go. When I walk into the kitchen Carolyn has a hand on Lillah's stomach and they both have tears running down their faces.

"I've never seen people cry so much as I have today," I grin at the two of them and kiss Lillah's forehead.

"Oh hush," Carolyn swats at me playfully, "That is my grand-baby in there. I'm just saying 'hi' and 'can't wait to meet you'," she smiles at us both and I can see she's honestly happy. "Congratulations, both of you, on the marriage and the little bean. I love you both."

A smile spreads across my face and I place my hand next to Carolyn's, both of us cradling all of Lillah's abdomen. "We love you too. All three of us," I tell her with a grin. I almost wish I could tell her she's going to have a granddaughter but I don't want to freak her out- or maybe I just don't want to share that yet.

"We should get going, baby," I tell her reluctantly, knowing she's enjoying this time with her mother.

I turn to Carolyn and look her in the eye, my expression serious now, "Don't be a stranger. You and William are welcome here _any_ time. Lillah and I will try to drive up as much as we can," I assure her, knowing she and Lillah will want to share as much of the next nine months as they can. It sends a ripple of sadness through me, knowing my own mother won't get to see her first grandchild grow and thrive and come into the world, but I'm happy to share it with Lillah's parents.

"Don't tell me that, Embry. I'll be moving in upstairs by next week!" Carolyn jokes as she pulls first me, then Lillah into one last hug.

Since I packed the car earlier, we are ready to hit the road. I walk Lillah around to the passenger seat and help her into the Acura, making sure she doesn't trip on her gown. Once she is settled, I give my keys to William and Carolyn, who have walked us out to the car. We call out to one another through our rolled down windows before I slowly back the car down the driveway, trying not to pay attention to all the writing on the windows, courtesy of Quil, I'm sure. Lillah leans over, resting her head against my shoulder as she speaks softly, "So are you going to tell me where we are going, husband?"

"I suppose, wife." I kiss the top of her head before continuing, "It's a place I found near Seattle, it's called Salish Lodge and Spa. It will take us about four hours to get there, so feel free to go to sleep."

"This day has been so wonderful, I don't want it to end. I couldn't have asked for a better wedding. Thank you, baby." she sighs softly.

"You're welcome. Today was just the start, Lills. I plan on making every day of the rest of our lives amazing; but first, you need to rest."

She grins up at me, but is unable to hide the yawn, "Every day I'm with you is perfect, you stubborn man, you're my wolf charming."

She curls up around my arm, quickly falling asleep. She barely opens her eyes when I stop for gas, falling right back to sleep when we get moving again. When I stop once more, we are in front of the hotel. She yawns and stretches then looks around, "Oh, wow, baby, this place looks gorgeous."

I hand the keys to the valet, before carrying her into the lobby. We are quickly checked in, the man behind the counter smiling when he sees we are still in our wedding clothes. He wishes us a quick congratulations and places the key to our room in my hand, I lift Lillah again and carry her all the way to the room. When we enter both of us oh and ah over how nice the place is. It looked great in the pictures but it was nothing compared to seeing it in person.

"This is absolutely perfect, Embry," she tells me while I carry her in and shut the door behind us.

As much as I want to drop her on the bed and do unspeakable things to her, I instead set her on her feet in front of the patio doors. We have a perfect view of the falls and she gasps when she sees them. We stand there, me holding her as we look out until our bags arrive. She goes to freshen up while I put our stuff away; only she gives me strict instructions that I'm not allowed to unpack her suitcase. I do as I'm told and put all the other things up while I wait on her.

When she comes out of the bathroom I can tell she's played with her hair a little. The curls look softer, looser, and it's a shining veil around her shoulders. I've discarded my jacket and tie, untucked my tux shirt and taken off my shoes and socks. We smile at one another and I hold out my hand, silently asking her to come to me where I'm standing at the end of the bed.

She walks toward me and places her hand in mine, our palms touching. I take the opportunity to bring her to me, to kiss her lips and run my hands through her thick hair. Her hands move up my chest to my shoulders and she wiggles against me. I moan into her mouth and she giggles into mine, knowing what she's doing to my body already.

Before things can get too far I pull her away from me, my hands moving down from her hair, along her neck and then gliding across her bare shoulders. "You look so beautiful, sweet Lillah." My words are a whisper while I caress her skin, touching as much of it as I can. I walk around her, my hand trailing down her arm and the back of her hand as I place myself behind her.

Her breathing has picked up a little and goose bumps have popped up all over the skin that is visible. I drop my face to place kisses across her shoulder, moving her hair aside as I nip at her. My hands begin working on the buttons down the lace of her gown, exploring the soft skin that is revealed as I unbutton the back.

I trace her skin with my fingertips, slowly stroking the beautiful creamy complexion as it's revealed to my hungry eyes. She shivers when I move my fingers up and down her spine, letting them rest on the gentle dip of her lower back. I push the dress a little, only needing to give it a small nudge to see it fall to the floor. It makes a quiet swish as it lands and other than our breath, it's the only sound in the room.

Once the lace pools at her feet, I'm in awe of the lingerie she has on underneath. It's all white satin and lace. My dick instantly jerks against my zipper, needing to get to her. As I enjoy the sight of her, she turns to me and starts working on unbuttoning my shirt and taking care of my pants. My hands move along the curves of her body, the swell of her breasts, her waist, her hips, down to her thighs and back up. The fabric under my hands somehow heightens everything I'm feeling and I have no doubt it's effecting her just the same.

Her nipples strain against the silk that covers them and I can't help but lean forward, biting it lightly. She moans and I do it again because I need to hear the sound fill the room. Lifting my head I look at her, a smirk on my face when I see her eyes are already heavy lidded and full of lust. _I did that. Only me._

"You are so sexy, Lillah. I don't know how I'll ever be able to keep my hands off of you," I tell her as she pushes my shirt and we watch it fall to the floor.

"Good thing you don't have to then, huh?" She grins, watching her own hands move across my chest and down my stomach. Lillah begins to undo my pants and when her hand brushes my erection I think I might cum before I can get inside of her. I bite down on my bottom lip, growling at her as she giggles and looks up at me. She knows what she's done and she's delighted to feel my cock twitch against her. Next she pulls my boxers down, carefully moving the elastic over my hard on then releasing them to float down to my ankles.

I release my lip and yank her to me, my hand on the back of her neck and my mouth attacking hers. I'm really getting into the kiss until her hand wraps around my dick. I pull away, gasping for precious air that I need while I try to control my body. My chin drops to my chest and I watch her hand pump me once, then twice before a bead of pre-cum appears.

"Baby, don't get me wrong, I love your hands on me, but I can't last if you keep that up. I want to be in you when I cum." Her laugh is deep and throaty when she hears how rough my voice sounds. _I'm_ impressed I can speak.

"Ok, Embry," she tells me simply and it sets off bells in my head. _That was too easy_. Before I realize what's happening she drops down on her knees and pulls my foreskin back with her hand. Her tongue darts out of her sweet mouth and licks the droplet away. I hiss and place my hands on her shoulders, trying not to dig my fingers into her skin or bruise her. _Fuck that feels good._

"Hot, sweet mouth. Smooth, wet tongue. Beautiful, pink lips," I mutter when she does it again and moves to take me full into her mouth. The air in my lungs whooshes out and I pull her away with my hands. Her head jerks up to look at me and I gently pull her so she's standing again. Our mouths meet, tongues fighting against one another before I finally pull back to talk.

"Later. Right now, I want to feel your pussy around me, pulling everything from my body when you cum for me. We have plenty of time for other things," I promise her, meaning every word. "I don't plan on leaving our bed often. There is a long list of things I've been itching to try with you," I grin mischievously at her and watch as her eyes go wide and her body shivers.

"O-ok," her voice sounds breathless to my ears as I push her back to the edge of the bed, her knees hitting it lightly. I quickly shed her of the beautiful lingerie covering her tits before she sits down on the bed. I run a finger down her cheek, her skin smooth and soft under mine, then move around the bed and push the bedding back further. Housekeeping turned it down for us but I'm not interested in having any of it in the way.

After that's taken care of I walk back to Lillah and lift her in my arms. She laughs lightly and says me name on a whisper. I don't let her say anything else though. My mouth takes hers then moves down her neck, tasting her before pulling away. I place her in the center of the bed and then slide in next to her, my hands threading through her hair, using it to bring her lips back to mine. One of my hands lets go and moves down her neck, across her collar bone to cup her breast.

I tweak her nipple, rolling it between two fingers and then tugging it gently. She lifts her chest off of the mattress, arching her back so she's pressing herself into my hand. I move from one breast to the other, treating it with the same attention. Her hands tug at my hair and I lift my face to look at her questioningly. She guides me down and I grin, realizing what it is she's after; my mouth on her tits. It makes my dick harder, having her guide me, showing me what she wants. If you had told me she'd be this way a few weeks ago, I wouldn't have been so sure. It's a turn on to know I'm the lucky bastard that gets to see her change into this woman that is so sure of herself.

My lips latch onto her nipple, licking and sucking it into my mouth until her breaths are so labored that I think she might cum before I've touched her below the waist. I grin against her puckered flesh, feeling a little too cocky for my own good. I can't help myself, she brings out this side of me. Releasing her nipple I look up at her, loving the intense expression on her face. She's sexy and beautiful and vulnerable. And the best part is, she's _my wife_.

"Please don't make me wait, Embry. I need you now," Lillah's voice comes out in a shudder. Her hand reaches for one of mine and brings it down between her legs, under the fabric covering her. I growl out her name when I feel how fucking wet she is. My fingers slip along her lips, spreading her open for my touch. Sweeping a finger tip across her swollen clit I'm treated with a whimper from her mouth. It makes my body strain to be inside of her, hearing her reactions, feeling the heat between her thighs. On a whim I lean down and lightly nip at her skin, slowly moving up to the apex of her legs. Her hips move, trying to create friction by bringing her thighs together but I don't let her. I'm holding her open with my elbows while my fingers explore her luscious skin.

The further I move up her leg, the closer I get to her pussy, the more I want to taste her. I can smell the faint hint of arousal and I can feel my heart beating in my dick. It's begging me to take her, but right now, I need to taste her. I lean back and place my hands on her hips, taking the elastic waistband in my hands. There's a damp spot on the fabric and I make a low "mmm" sound before I get rid of her panties as quickly as I can. My lips hover over her opening and I lightly run the tip of my nose over her clit before flicking my tongue out, the flat of it licking from bottom to top in one slow stroke. Her hips jerk up to meet my mouth again and I put my hands on them to hold her still.

She gasps my name and mutters, "Please." I know I can't deny her when she's like this, begging and needy beneath me. Crawling my way up her body, I place kisses everywhere I can touch. Where my lips don't make contact, my hands do. Between kisses and nips and licks, I mutter words of love and adoration against her skin. I stop at her stomach, run a hand across her smooth skin and kiss it softly before continuing on my journey.

When I reach her mouth I kiss her lips, savoring the taste of her tongue as it touches mine, until her hips begin moving against me, grinding and rotating against mine in her need for more. Unable to hold back any longer, I use my hips to push her thighs wider, getting settled between them and pressing my cock against her heat. Our collective groans fill the room. She feels so good against me. A perfect fit.

I drop my face into her neck, kissing her skin while I slowly push into her, savoring the feeling of having her surrounding me again. We made love last night but it doesn't matter; every time I enter her is like the first. We moan together and I don't move for a few stuttering heart beats. I need to gain control of my body before I cum right this second. Lillah rotates her hips, pushing them against me. When I groan she giggles and I can't help but place a rough kiss on her lips. I laugh against her mouth while my hands grip her hips, keeping them from moving any further.

Once I know I'm ok to move, I pull out of her slowly, her body tightening around me, trying to pull me back in. Her walls tremble a little when I stop and push back in. I repeat the process a couple of times but then I can't do it anymore. I need more. _She_ needs more. My hips pick up speed, stroking in and out as her hips set a rhythm with my own. I do my best to push into her as deeply as I can, loving the way her body reacts and the sounds she makes.

The only thing I can hear is the blood rushing through my body, her labored breaths mingled with mine. My head drops so I can kiss her lips then my mouth moves to her chin, jaw and neck, sucking her skin gently. After she got so mad at me, I try not to make a mark on her in a visible place but this time, I don't restrict myself. We are on our honeymoon for the next week and I don't care how juvenile it makes me, I want for everyone to see she's _mine._ Luckily she doesn't seem to mind so much and arches her neck, giving me better access.

Her hands tug my hair then run down my shoulder to my back, short fingernails gripping at my skin and making me growl against her. My hips jerk roughly, hitting her clit when I thrust in. She trembles against me and I move a hand to one of her breasts, playing at her nipple while the other moves between our bodies to help her out. "Oh God, yes please, Embry," she moans in my ear when I press against her clit and twist my hips just so, hitting deep inside of her. "Mmm, do that again," she insists and I hear the smile I can't see.

My tongue flicks along her skin and my lips follow with a kiss before I lift my head to look down at her face. I want to watch what I'm doing to her, to see her face when she cums around me. Her eyes are heavy lidded, her cheeks flushed with arousal and it makes my heart swell with pride. Twisting my hips again I hit her g-spot and watch her shudder, her eyes slamming shut and her teeth biting down on her bottom lip. Once more I try it again, adding a bit of pressure on her clit and her back arches off of the bed.

"You are so beautiful, my sweet Lillah, my beautiful wife," I whisper against her lips with two more thrusts and a pinch on the bundle of nerves between her legs. Her mouth falls open and an almost soundless squeak escapes. The quivering of her body around mine is all it takes and I mutter, "Fuck," as her pussy begins to milk around me, drawing out the unbearable tightness in my balls, my dick twitching inside of her as I cum. I lose all control over my body, my hips jerking erratically in and out of her, slowing only when we are both spent.

Letting my body fall against hers I make sure I brace enough of my weight on my arms so I'm not hurting her. My lips place kisses all over her face and neck, lightly licking the sweat there and I mutter, "I love you, so much. Thank you for being my wife. The mother of my baby. You are so beautiful, inside and out. I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you, sweet Lillah."

Her hands embrace my face and she brings her lips to mine. "You don't have to thank me for _any_ of that. I'm yours because I love you just as much as you love me. I'm thrilled to have your baby in my belly; to have that extension of our love. I'm _honored_ to be your wife. Don't ever forget that, my love. You are my Wolf Charming and I love you more than I can express with words."

A soft smile is on her lips and love is shining from her eyes. God I love this woman. Love her, so much it hurts. I can't wait to spend this entire week, and our lives, proving that to her, with words and actions.

I pull out of her, my cock sensitive to the movement and Lillah whimpering just a little. "None of that. I plan on making love to you all night. I hope you got some rest last night and in the car," I grin as I climb from the bed and go into the bathroom. Coming back out with a warm, damp cloth I clean her between her beautiful legs, taking my time and making sure I'm not too rough on her sensitized body. She runs a hand up and down my neck while I work. I drop a kiss on her lips before taking the cloth back into the bathroom. After I clean myself up and use the restroom I make my way back out. She's laying on her side, arms curled around her pillow and a satisfied and happy smile on her face.

Grinning as I climb into bed with my wife I pull her against me, tangling our legs together as I place kisses on her bare skin. One of my hands threads through the curls in her hair while the other moves down her side and to her stomach. We share a whispered conversation for so long she begins to doze while still speaking. Our hands rest on her stomach together, my fingers lightly grazing her skin. I shush her, promising I'll be here when she wakes up and we can talk as much as she wants. She falls asleep, her breathing gentle and steady as I lay there listening. My mind races to all the possibilities of our life together and I fall asleep with a big smile on my face and her hand on top of mine, our rings touching.

-0-

We've been on our honeymoon for a couple of days now when Lillah wakes me by jerking out of my arms at some ungodly hour. We've been sleeping wrapped around one another since I first began spending the night with her but she's only jumped out of my arms once before; the night she drank too much at Rachel's party. I don't have time to ask her what is wrong or why she's scurrying out of the bed before she disappears into the bathroom. Sitting up I watch her shut the door behind herself then I hear it; Lillah is sick and my stomach drops to my toes. It only takes me a second to move from the mattress and jerk the bathroom door open.

She is huddled on the floor, her long hair obscuring her face while she clutches the lip of the toilet. Moving to her, I pull her hair back quickly after grabbing a hair thing off of the counter. After that is taken care of, I soak a wash cloth with cold water and place it on the back of her neck. I kneel down behind her, placing my hands on her hips, helping her keep her balance. She reaches up and pushes the lever on the tank, turning to look at me sheepishly.

"You ok, baby?" I ask while I use the cool cloth to gently wipe the front of her neck and then softly, her cheeks. I duck my head to look into her wide eyes.

She nods her head and smiles weakly at me, "I'm ok now. I just got a little hot and it made me nauseous."

"Are you sure? Can I get you something?" I ask with concern. Over the past few days Lillah's occasional nausea has now turned to full-blown morning sickness. I'm ready to kick my own ass for being the cause of it. If I'd just kept my dick in my pants, or at least put a fucking rubber on it, she wouldn't be suffering like this. I'd forgotten about seeing Emily's sickness in Sam's head when she was pregnant with Eli. Had I remembered, it might have weighed heavily on my mind when I agreed to try for a baby.

"I'm sure. I don't need anything. I'm just going to rinse my mouth," she tells me reassuringly and I kiss her forehead before returning to our room. Instead of stopping at the bed, I head for the kitchen in our suite, pulling out the liter of ginger ale I picked up the day before, filling a tall glass with ice then pouring the liquid in, hoping that it will help settle her stomach. She's taken to nibbling crackers and drinking the bubbly soda almost constantly and up until now it's helped. Grabbing my loot I walk back to the bedroom just as she is getting comfortable in bed.

"Ginger ale," I tell her and place the glass on the night stand next to her side of the bed, "and crackers." Lillah looks up at me with a shy smile on her face. Without waiting on her to speak I lean down and kiss her lips gently before straightening and walking around to my side of the bed. Once I'm back in bed I watch her pick up the glass and take a sip of her drink. She makes a happy little "mmm" sound when it hits her tongue and slides down her throat.

She places the glass back down and turns to me before speaking, "Thank you, Embry. I don't know how I ever got so lucky."

"I'm the lucky one," I tell her sincerely. It's hard for me to look her in the eye knowing that I've done this to her, that I'm the one responsible for her discomfort. When I mentioned it yesterday, she became upset and told me it was only a natural reaction to the changes going on in her body. Still, I don't like it one bit; even if our baby is the reason. She has to carry her for nine months and go through labor; I wish I could at least take away this part of it for her.

We are both laying on our sides, facing one another when I place a hand on her hip and pull her to me. "Is this ok? I won't make you sick again will I?" I just need to hold her in my arms right now.

"No," she tells me softly, "this is ok." Lillah surprises me by scooting closer and pressing her lips to my skin. She starts at my neck and moves upward, to my chin, each side of my mouth and then lips. "You are so sweet, Embry. Playing doctor; always taking care of me."

"I figure it's the least I can do, since I'm the one that knocked you up and all," I say smugly, trying to make Lillah laugh. "You know everyone is going to think this is an 'oops kid', right?" I rub a hand up and down her back until she finally relaxes, placing her face against my neck. She kisses my skin while my hand travels from her back to her side, up and down in a soothing motion.

"I'll correct anyone that dares to think that. I think I wanted this baby as soon as I met you." She lifts her face then narrows her eyes, "'Oops kid?' Are you comparing our baby to my _car_?" She pulls back to look at me, referring to the time I made fun of her Acura.

Lillah's reaction makes me chuckle but I try to bury it before she hears. "No, sweetheart," I assure her while placing a hand on the side of her face and bringing her lips to touch my own. My hands move from her face, down her neck, over the swell of one breast and down to her stomach. Once there my fingers splay across her skin and I rub my fingertips below her navel.

"Your car is nothing compared to our baby," I whisper. "Our baby will be beautiful, just like her mom," I grin before kissing her again.

Lillah scoffs a little and her voice sounds skeptical. "You're convinced it's a girl. What if it's a boy?"

"Then he'll be just as good looking as his daddy, won't he?" I say with a cheesy grin.

As we talk I scoot down the bed, pushing the covers away from our bodies. I stop and kiss between Lillah's breasts, scoot a little lower then kiss between her ribs. She runs a hand up my arm, over my shoulder and up my neck into my hair. My lips keep placing kisses until I reach her stomach. This has been my ritual since we found out for sure we're pregnant. Convinced I'll be able to hear the heartbeat at some point I place my ear to her still flat abdomen. Every time I do this I'm a little disappointed that I don't hear anything.

"You think maybe once the baby is bigger I'll be able to hear her sloshing around in there?" I know my question must sound ridiculous. That is proven when Lillah doesn't say anything at first. When she finally reacts it's a giggle. She thought I was joking. _I was not._

"Honey, I really doubt that you'll be able to hear the baby 'sloshing'. I really don't think it 'sloshes' at all. I'm kind of skeptical about you even being able to hear the heartbeat." Lillah tells me, her voice soft. I frown, disappointed that it might be impossible for me to hear the baby in there once she grows more. The smile on Lillah's face is apologetic so I dip my head down to kiss her stomach again. My hand moves to her hip and runs up her sides until my fingers are just brushing the edge of her breasts. I glance up, feeling her watching me closely. She looks like she's concentrating on something but I don't ask what.

"I can't wait for you to start showing, Lills. For your tummy to be rounded with my baby," I tell her in a shaky voice. "If I'm not with you the first time you feel her move, please call me, promise?" I pull my eyes up to look at her. I've been thinking about this a lot. When things will start happening; movement and Lillah's body changing more. It almost makes me want to never leave her side.

She nods and promises that she'll let me know as soon as it happens. The tension in my shoulders eases up a little and I pull my gaze back down to her stomach. My hands continue their exploration of her body. "You know, I had a dream about our baby girl the first day we met."

"You what?" Lillah sits up too quickly, making me fall into her lap. I laugh before sitting up and kissing her lips.

"The day we met, the day I imprinted, I had a daydream about our baby girl. I could see her so clearly in my mind. She was around three or so. She looked so much like you, I loved her instantly. She had dark auburn hair and slightly darker skin, more like a honey color, but everything else about her was a mini version of you. It wasn't anything more than the two of you waving at me as I left for work, but I knew the potential for our life together, all the happiness we could have. It did a number on me."

Tears are sliding down Lillah's cheeks as I finish speaking and I lean forward to wipe them away, kissing her eyelids before I go on, "You were also pregnant in that dream. You were _so_ beautiful. You were around seven or eight months and you had your hands cradling your belly. Baby number two," I tell her reverently. "It's going to be a boy."

"Embry, you don't know-"

Puling her to me, I circle my arms around her waist then whisper against her ear, "I don't know anything except I love you. And I will do everything I can to show you that every day. Filling our house with our family and love and by giving you as many babies as you want."

"We have room for at least three."

"Just three?" I scoff. We've had the conversation before but this time it's real; no more pretending or hypothetical or even wishful thinking, she is mine and we are starting our family together. "Some of them can share rooms," I tell her casually. Lillah laughs and I realize she thinks I'm joking, again. Shaking my head at her doubt, I continue on. "I was thinking more along the lines of at least four. I'm shooting for two boys and two girls."

Her eyebrows lift when she hears my words. "I don't think you really get to choose the sex, baby."

"Maybe you're right," I tell her while shoving the blankets back until they fall on the floor. Pushing her until she's laying on her back I kiss down to her breasts. "I'd settle for four girls. Except they wouldn't be allowed to date until they are at least forty." I pause then speak directly to the baby in Lillah's stomach, "You hear that little girl? No boyfriends!"

Her peel of laughter at my words makes me jerk my head up. "I'm serious, I will kick any boy's ass that comes near our daughter." My head lowers again, speaking to Halona once more. "Boys are bad. They will want to make out with you and," I continue, shuddering as I speak. "I can't have that. Just ask your mommy, I defiled her."

At this point Lillah starts laughing so hard that it takes her a few tries before she can choke her words out. "Em, I don't particularly remember you defiling me, even when I begged." Her words are choppy as she gasps for air. "But feel free to make up for that in the future."

When her words register my head pops up again, but this time I grin mischievously. I don't even acknowledge her statement verbally. Instead, I dip my head down to kiss her tits as my fingers dance over her soft skin. My eyes stay glued on her nipples, grinning when they instantly pebble under my gaze. She reaches a hand up to thread her fingers through my hair, slowly massaging my scalp and running her nails up and down, from the crown to the nape of my neck.

She tugs at my hair and a moan exits my chest. Wanting to continue to focus on her instead of me, I sit up, looking down at her, my hands roaming all over her torso. My eyes land on her tits again, unable to tear my gaze away when she lifts her chest a little, pressing her breasts up, begging me without words to touch her.

Instead of placing my mouth on her, I cup one of her breasts in each of my hands. I run the pad of my thumb across her nipple and she gasps a little. Once again noticing the difference in the weight of her breasts I am distracted, lifting each one, watching my hands closely.

"What are you doing?" Lillah pulls me from my concentration and I glance up at her briefly. She's eying me closely and I smile.

"Sorry," I mutter. "It's just- I don't want to miss anything. I want to take the time to notice all of the changes your body is going through." I confess then roll my eyes at myself. "I'm such a pussy," I tell her and allow her boobs to fall from my hands. She groans when they bounce free, but I can't tell if it's from pleasure or pain.

"I seriously beg to differ with that, Mr. Call," she tells me as her eyes drop down to where I know she can see my hard on. "I love that you want to be involved, in any shape or form. I would never complain about that, Embry. Your wanting to touch, to explore and learn; it's beautiful."

"I plan to spend every second I can loving you," I pause and look her in the eye, "Mrs. Call."

"I will never get tired of hearing that," she smiles at me and her eyes sparkle with happiness.

I can't help but smile back at her as I assure her, "That's a good thing, because I'll never get tired of saying it."

My entire being is focused on her- my wife, the mother of my baby, the woman that changed my life and made it so much better than I ever thought it could be. She is my world, my entire reason for being. I feel like I should be getting on my knees and thanking the spirits for giving her to me; for allowing me to have this beautiful and awe-inspiring creature in my life. I could never put into words what she means to me. My life would be empty without her. Now we are starting our own family and it fills my heart to bursting to experience all of this with Lillah. She is the reason for it all, and I am blown away by her.

"How are you feeling?" I ask while propping my chin up to look at her. I'm slowly running my hand up and down her side then to her stomach, moving lower with every pass. It's always been hard for me to keep my hands off of her but now that she's carrying my baby, now that she's my wife- I feel like a caveman. If I weren't afraid of hurting her, I would be tempted to carry her over my shoulder everywhere we go. She is mine now; to touch, to taste, to love. _Speaking of tasting._ I lean down to kiss her hip, nipping lightly at her skin while I wait on her answer.

Lillah smirks, knowing why I'm asking this question. She knows I can't get enough of being inside of her; of feeling her cum around me so hard it almost makes _me_ see stars. "I'm feeling better," she says as her smirk turns into a full fledged smile.

"Really?" My eyebrows shoot up and I can't help the hopeful tone in my voice. She giggles when she hears my excitement.

I don't realize she's moving until her fingers wrap around my dick. "Really. I've enjoyed this honeymoon so far and I plan to continue to take advantage of this time with you, silly Embry."

I laugh and shake my head at Lillah's words. This woman never fails to surprise me. We've barely left the room since we arrived, spending most of our time making love as often as possible, including in the two-person Jacuzzi in the bathroom. Most of our meals so far have been room service, with me bringing it to the bed so she doesn't have to move.

As great as never leaving our room sounds, I know we will have to eventually, if only to try out the hotel restaurant. Lillah was checking out the menu when we checked in and I could tell she was dying to give it a try. I made us reservations for tomorrow night while she got settled in the room.

Of course, we did manage to make it out of the room for our couples massage at the spa the other day. We were both so relaxed after spending that time together that we spent the rest of the morning slowly making love.

I don't want to let her out of my sight, but while we were at the spa, I went ahead a booked her a surprise pregnancy spa package. I want to pamper her as much as I can, especially since our baby is reeking such havoc on her body right now. An hour or so without her won't be that big of a deal. The voice in my head laughs at my stupidity.

My goal for this entire honeymoon is for her to relax, after the stress we have both been through over the past couple of months, I don't want her to have to exert herself in any way- well, almost no exertion.

She is insatiable and reminds me of this, pulling me out of my thoughts by tightening her hand a fraction. My hips jerk forward in her palm and we both moan as I say her name while pressing my lips to hers.

"You are so beautiful, so perfect. I love you, my sweet Lillah," I whisper to her. There aren't enough words in the English language to describe how much I love her; how thrilled I am to spend the rest of my days with her. I deepen our kiss, hoping to convey to her how I feel.

As she returns every bit of emotion I'm putting into the kiss, I'm full of awe that just a couple of months ago I met this amazing woman that made me lose all control over my existence. I wasn't living before her. I didn't know how to love the way I should, or even what love was. I'd never been really kissed or touched before her; not in the way she does those things, with love and adoration. I'd definitely never felt love from anyone other than my mother, before her.

It was all before her, before my sweet wife came into my life and made me realize what I was missing. When she appeared I became whole. As much as I fought falling in love with her, I wouldn't have it any other way. She is my life now and it's perfect; _we_ are perfect. I can't wait to see what comes next.

PLEASE READ THE AUTHORS NOTE BELOW. ALL OF IT.

-0-

**A/N:** Anyone need a tissue? *deep breaths*

This is it. We have completed this journey with Lillah and Embry. **If it feels open ended, that's because it is.** These two (well, the whole gang) will be around in the future. Make sure you have us on _author_ alert, because we will be posting a few outtakes and deleted bits for Losing Control.

There will also be other non-Losing Control one-shots and short stories before we get into the Jake/Ness follow-up story. We need to get out of the Lillah/Embry head space before moving on to Jake and Ness. We don't have a post date on that one yet, unfortunately. It is scary and amazing (and surreal?) to be done with LC, but we are excited for what we have coming up. That includes some other stuff that isn't related to Losing Control. We'll be writing for challenges as well.

Thank you all for your support, we greatly appreciate the reviews and messages more than we can say. Double thank yous to dailyicandy and morethanhuman for cracking the whip.

Be sure to follow us on Twitter and/or Tumblr. We try to answer as many questions as we can and there will be some teasers (Safe for Work and Not Safe for Work) coming up. See everyone soon! **We'll be posting a few downloadable versions of Losing Control on our site so keep an eye out!** If you'd like to drop us a note or say hi, we are available through FFn PM's, through email stupidleeches at gmail or twitter/tumblr.

Much love, NKR & WH.


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